Because the Fourth Wall is for Wussies
The Joys of Coffee at 10:00 AM
Doodle Bug yawned and scrolled through yet another page of porn websites. Why couldn't she search for anime without getting at least 100 pages of porn? It was annoying...She sighed, sipping the last of her coffee as the next page loaded, temporarily blinding her with the sudden flash of light. She shook her head and started scrolling through. "Anime girls...No...Tentacles? Oh Faust no!" She whined as she saw a picture from one of the websites. That was one for the scarring memory folder...She shuddered and started scrolling faster, getting rather bored. It had been, what? Thirty, forty minutes of scrolling through nothing but terrifying things? "Okay, I am totally done- Oh, what's this?" Her eyes settled on the only un-filthy looking website.
'Meet your hoomans!'
"What in the buck is a 'hooman'?" Doodle Bug drowned, clicking the website. It looked like the average Roleplaying chat kind of website, completed with the 'Click here to talk!' button and everything. She frowned again, "Eh, better than scrolling through porn." She clicked the button, getting a sign up page. She quickly typed in her favorite username, Snuggle Bug, and clicked go. She was almost immediately connected with somepony, with the username Snuggle Rex, which was put as SR when she typed, to save space on the screen. "Similar names." She chuckled.
SR: So, is the website a fake, or are you really my pony OC?
SB: What the buck are you talking about?
SR: What's your favorite type of cookies?
SB: Chocolate Chip with Gummy Bears and Sprinkles...
SR: Aaaand, bam mothabuckas, I found something amazing.
SB: Bro, are you high?
SR: Nah, I just drank a cup of coffee at 10:00 AM
SB: Really? Me too!
SR: Of course, I'm writing you doing that right now.
SB: What?
SR: Eh, it's hard to explain...As I'm having this conversation, I'm typing the story so you keep answering.
SB: So...You really are high?
SR: No. You want me to make you?
SB: What? You can't do that!
SR: You doubt my powers of wickedness?
Doodle Bug snorted and shook her head. Why the buck did she feel so happy and carefree all of a sudden. She giggled.
SB: Ahhh, I feel really weird right now, my fine friend...
SR: Bam, see my greatness.
SB: Whoa whoa, calm down Satan! Undo this!
SB: Wait a moment...What the buck is Satan?
SR: Bro, I told you, I'm writing what you say right now! Satan is something in the human world, that's like, really bad.
SB: So it's Spike?
SB: OH MY FAUST, I AM SO SORRY SPIKE, I SWEAR THIS ISN'T ME!
SR: Heh heh. Alright, you are my favorite OC ever, so I'll stop messing with you! I'll edit out that bit, so Spike will never know, and I'll fix the high feeling.
Doodle Bug blinked as her head cleared out.
SB: Oh buck, you really are controlling me, huh?
SR: Hells yea, bro!
SB: Fine, if you are, I have a question.
SR: What is it, my lovely OC?
SB: Why don't I have a colt-friend, you bucker?
SR: ....Well, you see...I...Uh....Wibbily Wobbly Timey Whimey?
SB: No, you can't use Doctor Whooves quotes to get out of this! I know your tricks, you evil being!
SR: WHY AM I SUDDENLY EVIL?!
SB: BECAUSE YOU HAVEN'T GIVEN ME A COLT-FRIEND!
SR: DO YOU WANT ME TO GIVE YOU ONE?
SB: YES!
SR: Okay!
SB: Whoa really? That easy?
SR: Yep! So, Grey is going to be the overly attached colt-friend, kay?
SB: Whoa whoa whoa! What?
SR: You said you wanted a colt-friend, you're gonna get one. A clingy one, but you're gonna get one...
SB: That is not what I wanted! I want one that's nice and not clingy!
SR: Will Hoop do?
SB: WHAT? NO! HOOP IS MY BEST-FRIEND!
SR: And secret cruuuush.
SB: What? Oh Faust...Why do I feel attracted to Hoop now...
SR: Tee hee! Guilty!
SB: OKAY, LISTEN HERE!
SB: I DON'T WANT HOOP, OR GREY, OR ANYONE IN BETWEEN! I JUST WANT A NORMAL COLT-FRIEND!
SR: Ooooo, what about Minty?
SB: NO WHY WOULD YOU- Actually...
SR: See? Not a bad idea! You have liked him since you met!
SB: You have a good point...
SR: Yea! Okay, so you're shipped with Minty now!
SB: Sounds nice but, he's in Ireland...
SR: Tee hee, he'll be there in a few seconds ;)
SB: What?
A knock at the door distracted Doodle Bug from the 'hooman' that was typing her answer out.. She frowned and stared at the computer, then out to the hallway. She swallowed, looking at the computer once more, and pushing her self back. She got out of her chair, ripping the cord to the computer out of the wall and walking out of the game room, to her bedroom. "Nope nope nope nope nope." She said, climbing into bed. "Nopedy nope nope nope." She covered her head and closed her eyes.
~~~~
Meanwhile, in the human universe, a girl named Hope sat at her computer desk, ignoring her little sisters loud noises as she hopped around when she should be in bed, but was instead yelling and running around at 1:44 AM, and watching Pokemon. Hope quickly typed what was going on, smiling as she did. She chuckled to herself, watching Youtube videos as she typed her story on FiMFiction. She smirked as she finished, leaning back in her chair. "I done good." She said before realizing she actually just typed that. "What the-" She frowned, pushing herself out from the computer desk, ripping the computer cord out of the wall. She turned around, walking to her room. "Nope nope nope nope nope." She laughed to herself, laying down in bed. "Nopedy nope nope nope." She covered her head and closed her eyes.