Rainbow Dash is a Lie

by master18

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1850

When Rainbow Dash is turned into a cake by Discord, the Lord of Chaos and Disharmony, can her friends find a way to change her back?

Rainbow Dash messed up big time.

When she insults Discord, the Lord of Chaos and Disharmony, again, he decides to teach her a lesson she won't soon forget- by turning her into a cake.

Now it's up to Dash's friends to find a way of turning her back from a delicious cake to her normal pegasus self.

In her defense though, Discord IS rather funny looking.

Inspired heavily by TomSka's video, 'Cake', which can be found here on YouTube.

Not to be taken too seriously, I just wanted to have a bit of fun and get rid of my writer's block.

Published 2014-07-19 17:10:05 UTC
Last updated 2014-07-19 17:10:05 UTC

The Lie...

Twilight sat at the table in her library, staring intently at the sole item on the table.

The statute of a pony's head that normally adorned the table had been moved to the top of a bookshelf- one of the few places where Twilight could be sure nopony would trip over it.

In the statute's place was a large blue cake with a frosting image of a cloud with a rainbow lightning bolt shooting out of it emblazoned on the top.

"Okay, tell me. How did you get turned into a cake?" Asked Twilight, breaking the silence of the otherwise empty library.

"I- I insulted Discord again," replied the cake in a disembodied voice that sounded suspiciously like a one Mrs Rainbow Dash's voice.

Twilight nodded as if this was perfectly normal. "He is kind of funny looking," she replied absently.

"So, can you change me back into a pony?" Asked the cake hopefully.

"I don't know Rainbow Dash, even if it's possible to change you back into a pony, chaotic magic can only be controled by a chaotic being," she sighed. "I think your best bet is to apologize to Discord and hope he changes you back."

"I'm not apologizing to Discord, he turned me into a cake!" Cried the cake indignantly.

Twilight sighed again. "Well I can try to find a way to change you back into a pony in one of my books, but I'm not sure if I have a book on how to control chaotic magic."

"Great," sighed the cake. "I guess I'm stuck being a cake..."

"Don't give up, Rainbow Dash!" Said Twilight, reaching as if to pat Dash on the shoulder, but wisely decided against it and withdrew her hoof. "I'll try my best. Hopefully, you won't be a cake for more than a few hours."

"Thanks Twilight," sighed the cake.

Twilight closed her eyes and concentrated. Her horn blazed to life and about a dozen books zoomed towards her, orbiting in a slow circle to let her read the titles.

"No... No... No... Ooh, Artemares Fowl... No... No... Ah! Here it is!" She cried at last, letting her magic release all the books except the one she wanted. "Chaos 011- Everything You Ever Wanted To Know About Chaos Magic But Were Too Afraid To Ask," she read aloud as she sat down and opened the enormous book.

Hours passed, but if finding answers in normal books were hard, finding it in a chaotic book was even worse. None of the pages were in order, words moved around the pages, some pages would refuse to open, and pages seemed to disappear and reappear at will.

However, Twilight was never one to give up on a seemingly hopeless task, especially when a friend needed her, so she persevered in her attempt to unlock the secret of turning cakes back into the ponies they once were.

So engrossed was Twilight in her reading, that she didn't hear the door of the library. Nor did she hear Pinkie Pie say "Hi Twilight! Whatcha reading?" However, she did hear Rainbow Dash exclaiming, quite loudly, "PINKIE! PUT ME DOWN!!"

Twilight whirled around quickly to see Pinkie Pie frozen with a slice of cake in hoof, poised to eat it.

"Pinkie no! That's Rainbow Dash!" Cried Twilight frantically.

Pinkie gasped. "Rainbow Dash! You mean to tell me that you turned yourself into a delicious looking cake, and you didn't tell me?" She demanded, seeming more excited then angry.

The cake sighed. "Yeah, I- I insulted Discord again..."

Pinkie nodded absently. "He is kind of funny looking," she agreed.

"That's what I said!" Said the cake.

"Well then, first question, can I eat you?" Asked Pinkie Pie.

"NO!" Cried Twilight and the cake simultaneously.

"Pinkie, if you eat me, I will die!" Said the cake.

"Okie doki Loki!" Said Pinkie cheerfully, replacing the the slice she had taken.

"I've been searching for a way to change her back, but I've been searching for hours and I haven't found anything," sighed Twilight.

"Well maybe you need a good laugh!" Said Pinkie excitedly. "Maybe that'll change you back!" She took a deep breath.

"Oh Rainbow Dash my cake friend-"

"I don't think that'll help," said the cake quickly, cutting off Pinkie's song.

Pinkie looked at Twilight. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

"Sure Pinkie, you can help me look through these books to see if there's a spell that can change her back," Twilight replied, levitating a second tome of chaos magic over to Pinkie and setting it in front of her.

"Okie doki Loki!"

The two of them searched but Pinkie quickly got distracted by Rainbow Dash's delicious cakey smell and bounced over to her, leaving Twilight to the books.

"So are you sure I can't eat you?" She asked.

"Yes Pinkie! I'm sure you can't eat me!" Replied the cake. If she had eyes, Rainbow Dash probably would've rolled them.

"Whaaat if I gave you a hat?" Asked Pinkie, producing a silk top hat from beneath the table.

"No Pinkie! And where did you even get that?"

"I keep hats stashed all over Ponyville! In case of hat emergencies."

"Sugarcube, are you talkin' to a cake?"

"Applejack!" Exclaimed Pinkie, turning around to greet her. "And Rarity!"

"Yes, we saw that the door was open and decided to make sure everything was all right," said Rarity, extricating herself from the hug Pinkie had bestowed upon the two of them.

"Oh yeah, everything's great," replied Pinkie. "Rainbow Dash got turned into a cake and Twilight's trying to find a way of turning her back into a pony, but she won't let me eat her and-"

"Hang on Sugarcube," said Applejack, holding up a hoof and furrowing her brow in confusion. "Did you say that Rainbow Dash got turned into a cake?"

"Yeah, I got turned into a cake," said the cake glumly from the table.

Rarity and Applejack rushed over to the table and looked at the cake. "However did this happen darling?" Asked Rarity, confusion etched all over her face.

"I insulted Discord again," said the cake wearily.

"He is rather uncouth," said Rarity while Applejack nodded her agreement.

"I know, right?" Said the cake.

"Well how can we help?" Asked Applejack.

"Well Rarity, if you could help me look through these books, its easier to control chaos books if you have magic, and if you could find Fluttershy, Applejack?" Asked Twilight, walking over to the two of them. "I've been searching for hours and I may have an idea, but we'll need Fluttershy, and I may yet find something easier in these books."

Rarity and Applejack nodded and went to do their tasks while Pinkie continued trying to reason with the cake to let her eat it.

A half an hour later, Applejack returned with Fluttershy.

"Oh my, you were turned into a cake, Rainbow Dash?" Asked Fluttershy, flying over to the cake.

"Yeah, I insulted Discord again."

"Well that wasn't very nice, now was it?"

"Nice!? He turned me into a cake!!"

"Calm down Rainbow Dash, I think I have an idea," said Twilight, walking over with Rarity.

"You can change me back into a pony?" Asked the cake excitedly.

"Well the Elements of Harmony were able to restore Equestria and everypony to normal after Discord was defeated, so they might work now," said Twilight as she levitated the box with the elements over.

"I dunno Sugarcube, will they even work if one of their bearers is a cake?" Asked Applejack as Twilight distributed the elements.

Twilight gently placed Dash's element on top of the cake. "I don't know, but we have to try," replied Twilight grimly as she placed her crown on her head.

They all shut their eyes and concentrated. Soon, Twilight began glowing with power and her eyes snapped open, completely white. Magical mist swirled her as she lifted into the air a few inches. A rainbow extended from her crown, reaching for the rest of the elements. One by one, the others began glowing and lifted off the floor as their elements were activated.

However, when the rainbow reached for the element of loyalty, it stopped. The magic broke and the other five fell to the ground.

"Darn, I had hoped that would work," sighed Twilight, placing the elements back in the box.

"So I guess I'm stuck as a cake then..." Sighed the cake.

"Don't give up Sugarcube," said Applejack comfortingly.

"Twilight has never let us down before," added Fluttershy.

"Yes, I'm sure she'll find a spell to change you from a cake back into a pony," Said Rarity reassuringly.

"Oh, is that all you need?" Asked Pinkie.

She bounded over to one of the tomes on chaos and opened it to a page labeled 'Spells for changing cakes back into Ponies'.

Twilight stared at Pinkie in disbelief. "But- I- How did-" she spluttered.

"It was under 'C'," said Pinkie in a singsongy voice, bouncing in place.

Muttering to herself, Twilight read the page quickly and nodded. "Alright Rainbow Dash, this spell should change you back into a pony."

Everypony cleared out of the way as Twilight turned on the cake and activated her horn, which crackled with purple and green chaos magic.

"I dunno Twilight," said the cake nervously. "Are you sure this'll w-"

Her question was cut off as a beam of chaos magic shot from Twilight's horn and struck the cake. The cake disappeared in an explosion of green and purple light. When the smoke cleared, Rainbow Dash was sitting on the table, no longer a cake.

"Dashie!" Cried Pinkie, launching herself at Rainbow Dash with a soul crushing attack hug.

As Dash struggled to free herself, or at least draw breath, everypony else began talking about how grateful they were that Dash was no longer a cake.

"Alright, alright, I get it!" Said Dash, finally extricating herself from Pinkie's death hug.

"Are you alright Sugarcube?" Asked Applejack.

"I think so," replied Dash, shaking her head. "I had the worst nightmare about being eaten. And frosting."

"Well at least you're back to normal," said Rarity.

"So d'you think you're feeling up to helping me tear down the old barn still?" Asked Applejack.

"You know it!" Said Rainbow Dash, crouching and preparing to launch herself out the library door. "I bet you I can take down the barn before you could even get there!" She taunted.

"In yer dreams," retorted Applejack, crouching down to run.

"Go!" Called Dash, launching herself forward with a powerful stroke of her wings.

Well, with a powerful stroke of one wing. As soon as she launched herself forward, she tumbled to a stop on front of the library's door.

She turned to look at her wings and cried out in horror when she saw that one wing was missing, barely a stump left. "Where'd my wing go!?!"

Everypony turned to glare at Pinkie who had a bit of blue frosting on her lips.

She blushed under the stare of the five ponies. "I- I may have had one slice..." She mumbled.

"PINKIE!!!!"