Dear Miss Dash, Who I Have Accidentally Offended
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The Best, Most Sincere Apology Letter Ever
Dear Miss Dash, Who I Have Accidentally Offended
Rainbow Dash flew inside her house. She was more tired than a bear during hibernation, since she had been helping Fluttershy with her larger animal friends all day. Rainbow's mouth opened into a wide yawn.
"That was so much work," she groaned. "I never thought- hold on, wasn't there a letter in my mailbox?" Rainbow Dash rubbed her eyes. "Great. I never thought I'd be reluctant to take a flight." She spread her wings and flew down to the open mailbox. Inside was a single cream colored envelope. Rainbow Dash picked it up and flew back up, making no effort to speed. Once she was back inside, Rainbow Dash poured herself a glass of cider and read over the envelope.
"This is from Cloud Kicker?" She muttered. "That can't be right, can it?" Her mind wandered back to the fight she had been involved with several days ago. Cloud Kicker had gotten mad about some clouds, and apparently High Spirits was hogging the thunder clouds, Blossomforth was sick, something about Derpy, yada yada yada. Rainbow hadn't really listened to Cloud Kicker, she had just told her friend that she was being a big whiner and needed to get back to work. Then it had just turned into a yelling match between the two. Raindrops had complained she had gone deaf listening to them.
"I'd better see what it is," Rainbow muttered, downing another glass of cider (that wasn't nearly as delicious as Applejack's but it would have to do since Cider Season for the Apples wasn't until September). She tore open the top with her teeth and read the letter.
Dear Miss Rainbow Dash, who I have offended terribly,
I am write my sincerest apologies, and I wish to explain why I was cross with you. It was terrible of me to raise my voice against you, my superior. Truly, I regret my actions that afternoon.
The troubles in question started when Blossomforth did not appear for her job, as I am sure you are aware of. Since our lovely weather team was short a pony, I offered to take upon myself the burden of Blossomforth's extra workload. I was doing my usual shift, as well as Blossomforth's clouds in the west quadrant of the town of Ponyville.
As I worked dutifully at my job, Miss Derpy Hooves arrived into my presence. She informed me that High Spirits and her team were pushing an unscheduled storm towards her house. I thanked her for the notice a proceeded to follow her back to her house. When I arrived, there were no clouds in sight. I became irritated with Derpy, but she apologized for the inconvenience. I accepted her plea for forgiveness and returned to Blossomforth's shift. It was then I noticed that several Cumulonimbus clouds had disappeared from the scheduled amount.
Please forgive me for my unnecessary tantrum, and allow me to continue. Remembering what Derpy had mentioned, I deduced that High Spirits was the questionable pony who had taken Blossomforth's clouds. I scoured the skies, searching for her, until I spotted her with several other weather team members.
Upon questioning, High Spirits denied that she was the perpetrator. I must inform you, Rainbow Dash, that it was later discovered that she was, in fact, the culprit. But that is not the story on hoof. High Spirits, no matter how pressured, denied ever laying sight on the clouds that rightfully belonged to Blossomforth. As I questioned, I noticed her companions left her to my mercy, indicating they did not want to stand by their friend, further indicating they helped High Spirits bring the clouds to Derpy Hooves's lovely house.
I then decided to inform you, my supervisor, of the situation. I left High Spirits and proceeded to seek your company. When I found you, I began to describe the situation to you, and became quite irritated when you seemed to be taking the matter into little importance. Of course, as my superior you were listening to any problems that might arise.
As you obviously know, you told me to quit whining. From a perspective, I suppose I could be perceived as whining, but such was not my intention. I then lost my temper and began shouting insolent comments at you, and you responded by doing the same. This is where the explanation ends, for we both know what happens after this confrontation.
Therefore, I ask that you can find it in your heart to forgive me of my wrongdoing. It was naive of me to shout and become irritated with my superior. I hope we can continue to be friends and colleagues.
Yours truly,
Cloud Kicker
Post Scipt: I can and will provide insight to the case of High Spirits if you require that insight.
Rainbow Dash finished off her zillionth jug of cider and stared at the letter.
"Wha' was tat?" She slurred, giggling a little bit. "So stupid!" She hiccupped. "Need ta write a 'ply." Rainbow fumbled around for a quill and poked it into her mouth.
"Tickles!" She giggled as the quill tickled the prof of her mouth. Rainbow wrote her letter:
Der Cloud K icker
Yu are fired
Rain bow danger dash
Rainbow giggled again and chugged down another glass of cider.
The Best, Most Sincere Apology Letter Ever
Extra: Cloud Kicker at the bar
Five weeks later, Cloud Kicker knocked the door of the Ponyville Bar open. The bell tinged merrily, signaling her entrance.
"A large cider, please," she told the bartender. The mare simply nodded and went to get Cloud Kicker's drink.
"Cloud Kicker, you look horrible." Cloud Kicker turned to see Berry Punch next to her.
"Your mane is a mess," Berry Punch continued, "and you have bags under your eyes. Did I mention your wings are ruffled?" Cloud Kicker shrugged.
"Rainbow Dash kicked me off the weather team five weeks ago," she explained. Berry Punch stared at her.
"What did you do?" She asked as the bartender returned.
Cloud Kicker took a swig of cider and responded, "I wrote her a lengthy and eloquent apology letter after a fight." Berry Punch continued staring.
"And you've been coming to this bar for five weeks, drowning your sorrows in cider because you don't have the heart to get a new job?" Cloud Kicker nodded and took a drink of her cider. Berry Punch rolled her eyes.
"You should probably find a new job. Doesn't your younger cousin run a soccer team?"
"We're practically identical. It confuses the spectators."
"Right. What about being a sculptor?" Berry Punch suggested. Cloud Kicker narrowed her eyes.
"I think I'll stick to the bar," she responded. Berry Punch sighed.
"Fine. But don't come crying to me when you're labeled as the new town drunk."
"Agreed," Cloud Kicker answered.
