Love's Derelictions

by Celestial Swordsman

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Queen Chrysalis, Shining Armor, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance, Princess Cadance
Length: 5261

Shining Armor confesses to Celestia that he might no longer be able to serve as Captain of the Guard, due to his unique marriage situation.

Shining Armor confesses to Celestia that he might no longer be able to serve as Captain of the Guard, due to his unique marriage situation. Being in love can make one dreamy and distracted, but this is different. The love of your life doesn't usually hunt you.

A light-hearted one-shot.
For serious and deep stuff, try my other story. Teen for sexual topics.

Cover art by the talented Conicer of DeviantArt and Fimfiction
originally made for TheWraithWriter's story here.

Published 2014-07-21 16:00:02 UTC
Last updated 2014-11-08 06:46:08 UTC

Foothold

Farshire lay shrouded in an unusually heavy night. This settlement was the most remote outpost of Equestria on the steps of the eastern wilds. It was a small village palisaded against the dangers that would sometimes roam after dark. However, a greater threat dwelled in the lands beyond, that watchmen could not spy and walls could not contain. Now the houses were all still as death, and green light seeped out of the windows of the central fort.

But Equestria protects its own. A bright red flare suddenly cast the little town in stark light as two formations of pegasus guards swooped in from opposing directions. There was a bright flash behind the closed gate. Captain Shining Armor and three other royal magicians appeared in mid gallop and raced down the central street. Several of his troops fell in behind him as they rushed to the fort while the rest kicked in doors and stormed houses and shops.

They met no resistance and the main assault team converged on target. At Armor’s signal half of them jumped back into the air, arcing toward the roof and windows. The front gate of the fort hung open. “Be ready for anything!” he warned, and all of them charged into the eerie light in a rush.

They burst in from all sides, spears at the ready, and surrounded their enemy. The central space of the fort, which also served as the town hall, was filled with changelings. The enemy was holding their ground in the center, in a defensive yet strangely formal arrangement around their leader.

Shining Armor gulped. There she was. Queen Chrysalis lay on a bed which had replaced the mayor’s podium. She sat up on the cushions, still very much at ease. “You’re here sooner than I expected,” she said, looking straight at him.

All the soldiers were tensed, waiting for their superior’s command or their foe’s advance. “Hold,” the Captain ordered, and stepped forward. He noted that his guards had the advantage of numbers, unless there were more changelings in hiding—a distinct possibility. However, it did not seem that they meant to fight.

“Where are the ponies who live here?” Shining Armor demanded.

“They’re in the cellars downstairs. I didn’t even drain the life from them. Hardly at all.” She motioned her warriors to withdraw from the top of the staircase to allow passage. “You can check on them if you like. I don’t want them.”

He sent three of his soldiers to investigate, while the stallion himself stayed, his eyes locked with hers. She sighed, almost a huff, knowing that she would have to wait until he knew everypony was safe. A short while later, the report came, “They seem to be accounted for.” Shining Armor nodded and relaxed ever so slightly.

“I wanted to see you,” she began.

Wrath faded to irritation, and he protested, “Really?! And this is what you do?”

“I got your message,” she replied, nonchalant. “ It interested me enough to continue the conversation.”

He facehoofed. “I suggested you ask for an audience with the Princesses, not… whatever this is.”

The changeling queen stirred, and rose. She frowned. “Diplomatic immunity, ethics, codes of honor, these things don’t apply—to monsters.” She sauntered towards him, measuring his reaction. “No Princesses, no plotting, I just wanted to talk to you.” He let her approach within a couple meters, and they ended up staring at each other.

“Mind if we trot somewhere a little more private?” She glanced about at the crowd of soldiers.

Shining Armor sighed. “Follow us—but not too close,” he said to his two magicians, and the leaders walked together out of the fort. He was not too proud to admit he needed an escort.

They roamed down an empty street. The town was still again, and vacant, with plenty of space to think.

Unwilling to believe this made any sense, he asked, “If you just wanted to talk to me, why didn’t you sneak into Canterlot?”

She answered reflexively, as if it was bitterly obvious. “I’m not going near that place, not with you and her. Not after what you… did to me… and all of mine.”

“What we did to you?” He shot back, “What about what you did to us?”

She stopped, her eyes wide, dumbfounded. “You don’t even know?”

He put the pieces together as he remembered. “Oh, you mean that, ‘love bomb’ thing.”

“Love… bomb… “ she repeated, with no small hint of disgust. “Surely that is a ghastly weapon, even to your kind. Imagine crossing a desert in search of water, only to drown in wine. Weakened and wounded, scattered to the four winds. If we were to go through that a second time, the hive would be utterly ruined.”

“So love IS like food to you,” he observed.

“In a sense,” she responded, “We do eat food, but we must take a certain amount of love-energy from others as well.”

“Why do you have to take it?” he inquired further. “Is it really true that your kind can’t love?”

“That’s what they tell you?” For a moment she was put off by the ignorance, but quickly put that aside. In a lower tone, she confided, “We’re not like that. Changelings can come to experience some affection within the hive, especially for our mates. That’s actually why I came back. Do you remember… us?”

The captain froze apprehensively. “Yes. At first it was fuzzy, but I remember most of it now. But there was no ‘us’. I only love Cadence, you just made me think you were her.”

“I know,” she admitted, but seemed wistful. “ And I felt it all. You love her so MUCH. I didn’t think it was possible. It felt like you loved me.”

“It was a lie,” he said firmly.

“I know. It was my lie.” She tilted her head, and her mouth tentatively stretched to a sly smile. “But do you remember, the times when we were alone, and I showed you my true form? We even mated, you could see you were doing that with ME.”

“You had me hypnotized. I do remember the way you used me, it comes back to me in dreams—nightmares.” He held back an explosive mix of feelings.

She looked down.

He shook his head. “You know, me and Cadence talked about it, and we decided to wait till after the wedding to do that. But you wouldn’t understand something like that. You just don’t care.”

“I tried not to care,” she revealed, and pulled herself up to a more regal demeanor. “My first duty is the survival of me and my hive. Nothing can get in the way of that. But a part of me was sad that our wedding wasn’t real. I wanted to believe my own lies. Of course I know I could never be loved like that.”

He was unimpressed that she would use a poor-puppydog line like that on him, and equally unimpressed with himself for feeling a bit sympathetic. He shrugged it off. “I thought you said you could love. Why don’t you just find your own mate?”

“I do have one suitor… Who I am avoiding.” Her throat clicked. “He doesn’t love me, he wants to feed on me, and make me feed on my subjects—tribute, if you will. Now that my hive is weaker, I don’t know how long I can resist him.”

His brow furrowed. “Wait--But if changelings can love, why do you need to feed on others?”

She started walking again; what he was asking, would be a long story. “Love has different parts, which you ponies don’t always have words for. We are capable of affection, but we cannot generate the magical energy associated with your love,” she clarified.

“You ponies… “ Her slitted eyes scanned him, marveling at something he couldn’t see. “Have so much. It flows through the sun, the moon, and the landscape, rainbows and flowers, and wells up in you. It gives you ‘cutie marks’, makes you feel special, it makes you live. When you give it to each other—somehow you end up with more than you started! But you have so much more than you need, that you forget to care about it. You bathe in it, you squander it, you destroy it when you fight each other. But we can’t take it in the same way. We are left with nothing. So cold, so empty.”

“The Princesses would not have told you this. Maybe they even forgot,” she prefaced bitterly. She looked up at the stars. “We were once counted among the races of ponykind, and lived together. Then things went sour, and each race turned against the other. That terrible winter could have ended the world, but you came back together… only the new order didn’t have any place for us. It distanced the zebras, but the changelings were cast off, unwanted and feared. For us, the winter never ended.” Chrysalis turned and said with a snap of her fangs, “THAT is why we take back what you deprived us of.”

He tried to keep track of the implications, and whether or not he believed it all. “How do you know we wouldn’t give you love if you asked? Why don’t you try to change things?”

She replied matter-of-factly, “Ponies are afraid of us now, and they hate what they fear. Some of us have tried, but always failed. The changelings who do reveal themselves have always been betrayed and hunted. One of my predecessors was killed during a “peaceful negotiation” in Saddle Arabia. That’s why I don’t want your Princesses involved.”

“Why did you invade? What made you come back now, after all this time?”

“We were feeding to the east, from the Zebras. But the northern hive began to encroach on our territory. They are learning to feed in ways that even I wouldn’t, and on their own kind.” She made sure he saw her expression of disgust. “Their attacks horrified the Zebra kingdoms, who came together to get rid of all the changelings in their land—even though we had been there a long time, and hadn’t caused much harm. My hive needed a new feeding ground, and we needed the strength to resist my suitor’s unnatural hive and keep our way of life. They pushed us toward Equestria. We saw that you are strong, but you weren’t watching for us because it had been a long time since we fed here. Once you knew we were here, you could force us out. Our best chance was to take everything by surprise. But now that I have been defeated, I do not know what to do.”

“Sounds like you need help,” he summarized.

She gave an anxious growl at her fate. “But I can’t face the Princesses again. They have no reason to help me, and they can’t just forget that I attacked them.”

“You came to me because you want to believe me,” Shining Armor claimed with certainty. “You’re just too scared to do it.”

“I brought you here because you must care about me, otherwise you wouldn’t have contacted me. I’ve seen inside you, and I trust you.” She took a deep breath. “I have to know if there’s any way you might want to be with me.”

Shining Armor reminded her, “You should know that I will never leave Cadence.”

The black Queen stopped and nodded sorrowfully. Her thoughts turned dark. What would happen to her?

He stepped in front of her and interrupted. “But you are wrong about us, and about yourself. I apologize for everything we’ve done to you and your kind, to make you resort to living like this. If what you told me is true, that’s really awful. That doesn’t give you the right to do what you did. But we can make this right.”

She seemed doubtful.

Undeterred, he explained, “The Princesses you’re so afraid of… Luna understands what it’s like to feel unwanted, to become bitter and empty for sooo long. Celestia has already felt the pain and regret of making Luna an enemy and casting someone she cares about into exile. She already forgave and welcomed her most dangerous rival once before. If there are any two ponies who would understand what you’ve gone through, and be willing to help you, it’s them.”

He promised, “You don’t have to steal anything anymore, least of all love. By the very definition of love,” he reasoned, “we don’t just care about ourselves. We weren’t made like this, with love welling up inside us, for us to only love those who can repay us. Maybe it’s been this way for ages, but why shouldn’t it be like it was before? Why not tonight?”

“No, I—“ she replied nervously. “It seems we can’t be loved after all. It won’t work.”

“It will, and I’ll prove it to you,” he said with a stamp of his hoof. He turned and strode back toward the fort, Chrysalis at his heels. As they doubled back, they ran into the two unicorns that were following them. “Have some of the guards come out to the main street,” he ordered, and they hurried to obey.

He stopped in front of the fort as pegasi were filing out—his witnesses. A taller changeling came to the gate after them, but was stopped at spearpoint. “I have to see my Queen!” he proclaimed indignantly.

“Let him out,” Shining Armor allowed.

Several changelings followed the bold one outside, and he approached his leader with concern. “My Queen, what are they going to do to you?”

She put a hoof around his shoulder and comforted, “It’s alright.” In truth, her own nervousness had drawn him out to her. She stilled him, and bade him move back.

Shining Armor raised his voice and proclaimed, “Chrysalis, I forgive you. I only have one love of my life, and that’s Cadence. But I care about all ponies, and I won’t send you away empty. Your ponies shouldn’t have to live like monsters. I can’t let you steal anything, but I can give you what I have. Take what you need for tonight.”

The changeling’s nostrils flared involuntarily and her eyes widened.

A royal magician interrupted, “Sir, I don’t think you should be doing this. Has she tricked you again?”

“I know what I’m doing,” the captain responded. “This isn’t something she’s doing, this is me. By all means, stay alert, but don’t stop me.” He turned to Chrysalis.

Green fire washed over her body and turned her black carapace to soft pink fur. “Cadence” looked at him desirously.

“No,” he said. “DON’T do that again. No more tricks, you have to receive this as yourself.”

She reluctantly gave up the identity she was wearing, saying, “I thought it would make it easier for you.”

…

“I’m ready.”

She brought her face close to his. They gazed intensely into each other’s eyes. Chrysalis used her magic to induce a faint stream of light to come out from his eyes into her. The trail of green vapor widened, and she soaked it in hungrily. It was so satisfying, and sensuous to her. As her thirst overcame her restraint, she rose over him and started to drink it in through her mouth, and take more and more.

He weakened, and began to shake. Through cold sweat, he struggled against his fear, and finally looked on her with renewed empathy. The green light coming from him changed to blue.

Lost in the experience, her head swayed back and forth, carousing with the love-energy. She wrapped one hoof around his neck and brought her mouth over his chest, now drinking directly from his heart. She moaned. She closed her eyes, gulping, gulping, until her fangs brushed against his skin.

When she finally released him, she was panting and trembling, but he stood strong before her. She recovered her breath and asked, “Aren’t you… don’t you feel drained?”

“Like you said, when we give love, we gain more than we give.”

The Queen blinked. “That’s… remarkable.”

“Okay, I am a little woozy.” He shook the stars out of his eyes.

“That’s all?” She noted with surprise, “Then you must really love me.”

They were silent a moment, unsure what to say.

The changeling warrior approached his queen again. She transferred a generous amount of energy to his horn, and motioned back toward the fort. “Share it with the others.”

Shining Armor surveyed all the dumbfounded spectators. He couldn’t find the magician who had objected. There was a “poof” behind him, and pink reflected briefly from every surface. “Cadence!” he exclaimed with a start.

Chrysalis gave a warning shriek, terrified that she had been betrayed. Some changelings flew away in fright, and others crouched low and snarled, determined to protect her. In her first moment she moved as if she would stand between Cadence and Shining Armor. She wanted to jealously guard her prize, but she shied away, realizing that she had already lost him. Perhaps she even didn’t want to hurt the alicorn, out of admiration of his love for her.

She turned to flee, but found herself stopped. She glanced down and realized she was desperately clutching his hoof, and he was doing his best not to let her pull his legs out from under him.

“What’s going on here?!” the Princess demanded as she strutted towards her mate.

He blushed crimson as she approached. He knew better than to say, “I can explain.”

Chrysalis hunkered behind him, still grasping his hoof. Since she was unexpectedly unwilling to fight or leave without him, she instinctively morphed to protect herself.

Cadence rushed to his side, and asked, “Are you alright?” He looked her in the eyes briefly, and nodded. She looked past him to where mermaid Flufflepuff lay, looking up at her plaintively. She narrowed her eyes at the thing, but her face softened and she said to her lover, “You just have to protect everything, don’t you?”

“Everypony.”

“That’s what I love about you.” She leaned in and kissed his cheek tenderly. She looked again at Fluffthing. Her rival’s phony cuteness, and contact with her stallion, only made her more uneasy. She turned away for a three-second internal conversation. A second later, she moved toward the changeling.

Chrysalis winced; but then she was shocked to feel the warmth of the Princess’s hoof on her foreleg, and see kindness on the faces above her. Reassured, she resumed her natural form. As her panic left, she let go of her reflexive hold on Shining Armor. Embarrassed at her posture, she stood up, but kept her head low.

She looked back to see that half of her changelings were still fleeing through the night sky. She called them to her, but they had grown unsure of her leadership and would not face the dread of that terrible magic.

Shining Armor looked too, and understood.

“Sweetie?” Cadence prompted, unsure what to do, but wanting to be involved.

He looked away for a moment to collect his thoughts, and then turned straight to her. “Let’s do it,” he said, and added, “but gently this time.”

“I’ll follow your lead,” she offered.

They stood up and put their hooves together. They nuzzled and kissed, and tenderly placed their horns together. They concentrated deeply. Bands of blue and pink energy came out from them and intertwined. Chrysalis backed away fearfully as it built to a climax, but instead it tapered off and only briefly flashed a small heart. The spell went out as more of a ripple than a shockwave. It felt like a warm breeze; the soldiers there noticed no difference except feeling a little inappropriately happy. The changelings, though, could sense it for what it really was. It eased their pains, and they felt invigorated. Those that had fled turned around, and cautiously began to land in the town again.

Cadence wrapped a hoof around Shining Armor’s leg and addressed Chrysalis. “You must be having a very interesting conversation with my husband. Care to fill me in?”

The Second Invasion

The Second Invasion

Princess Celestia sauntered through the halls of the royal palace. She took a sip of tea from the cup she levitated along with her. She sparkled a little brighter for having just raised the sun.

Her ears caught a voice saying, “Celestia, your majesty, I need to speak with you…” She stopped and looked around. She did not see anyone addressing her, and it seemed to be coming from the other hall. She waited a moment. There was a shout, a clang, and sounds of a struggle. The Princess put her tea down on a display beside a bust of Starswirl the Bearded, and stepped around the next corner.

Shining Armor approached her, levitating a blunt sword in front of him and panting. He eyed her with distrust, and summoned an extra glow to his horn. He hit her with a blast of magic. It didn’t hurt her but it did raise her eyebrow.

He gulped. “Celestia, your majesty! My apologies!” He bowed low. “If you’ll forgive me, there is a matter I should have discussed with you earlier.”

She drew a deep breath and fell back into her relaxed state. “It’s alright, Shining Armor. You know you can talk to me anytime. You may still be a guard but you’re also part of the family now.”

He sheathed the sword, despite resistance from the dings that had accumulated on its edge. “That’s actually what I was gonna talk about.” He looked down.

“Come along,” she beckoned, and continued her stroll.

“I would be more comfortable to stay in one place…” Shining Armor worried, but followed after her.

“So what’s bothering you?” she asked, in a soothing voice. “I do not believe there could be anything we could not work out.”

He relaxed a bit in her presence, but still looked about. “You’d think! But I’m not sure. I’m so grateful for what you’ve done for me, but in my new situation, I—“ His tone of voice lowered with regret. He had avoided saying so for months. “I have to confess that I don’t think I can be Captain of the Guard any longer. Maybe not a guard at all.”

For the first time showing a hint of real concern, she replied, “Hm. I did not expect to ever hear you say that. What could make you feel that way?”

A nervous smile teased at his face. “Well first of all, there’s Cadence. She’s just so beautiful and kind…. I’m in love and she kind of consumes my thoughts all day. It’s hard to stop thinking about her. I’ve always been committed to my duties but now I’m watching the clock and waiting to go home.”

Celestia’s concern immediately vanished. “Well that’s only normal. You’re fine.”

“But that’s only half of it,” he said, still insistent.

“Literally,” she quipped.

“It’s embarrassing… “ He quickly corrected, “Don’t get me wrong, it’s wonderful. At first I thought I could keep a handle on it but I don’t know what I was thinking. Some of the other guards have found me—“ he blushed, “—attacking or making out with pots and statuary on the palace grounds.”

“I heard about that,” she chuckled. “Did you get it right?”

“Sometimes.”

Turning as he walked to show her the swords that hung on each side, he explained, “I have to carry a blunt sword as well as a sharp one. Apparently it makes it more fun if I’m armed. But when I’m patrolling I’m not sure I’m on the lookout for enemies any more. If I was really attacked, I’d probably draw the blunt sword out of habit!”

She mulled that thought over, and let him continue as they walked through the colorful beams that came through the stained glass.

“I know it’s irresponsible to be doing this when I’m on duty. But she flirts with me like this all the time. You know I can’t really control her, and I don’t really try. Our relationship isn’t like that exactly. And I’ll admit that I do actually find it pretty fun. Sometimes wears me out, but it’s worth it for me. But I should be doing this on my own time, not while securing the perimeter. And it doesn’t stop there.”

His blush deepened as he confessed further, “We’ve had sex quite a few times, during patrol and everything. I know the little hiding spots around the palace and after we’ve sparred a bit we’re all turned on. Sometimes we don’t even get hidden away.”

Celestia stopped and turned to him. “I never heard about that. Are the others covering for you, or—“

“No, we’ve never been caught,” he clarified. “Some of the guards have stumbled in on us a couple times, but they didn’t see us.”

“Wait what?” Celestia interjected. “You can do that?”

Exotic satisfaction mixed with the sincerity on his face. “Well, of course I can’t, but when I’m holding onto her, she can hide me with her. I don’t think a regular changeling could do that, but a changeling queen can. I just have to sort of… go along with it. I’m getting better at it.”

“That’s new,” the alicorn admitted.

“Thank you again for showing us that the old law about polygamy was never actually repealed. Things in my love life became so much simpler when I could just accept that two amazing mares are in love with me.”

Celestia cautioned, “It’s worth repeating; there are some very odd practices in the old code and I don’t agree with all of them. There’s a reason polygamy fell out of favor—trust me, I was alive back then. It’s very difficult to keep favoritism and jealousy from overtaking those relationships. I saw that your relationship is a very special case.”

“Then thank you especially,” Shining Armor repeated. He smiled and shook his head. “How did I ever get so lucky.”

“Actually, it was Luna who thought of it, but she’s sheepish about it, so she had me say it. After spending a thousand years out of the loop, she’s an expert on the archaic,” Celestia informed. “My advice to you, is that since they have found a way to share you, one that they are both happy with, you shouldn’t mess with it.”

He was silent a moment as he thought about that point. Still conflicted, he explained, “But sometimes I feel like it doesn’t leave room in my life for anything else. Cadence is the alicorn of romantic love, and as a queen, Chrysalis is in the prime of fertility for her kind. I’m happier than ever, but sometimes it’s hard to keep up. I’ve taken steps to… boost my production. Of course the extra hormones don’t help me keep my head while I’m patrolling. And they both want to have foals!”

“Oh dear. Well of course,” she smiled, completely amused at the situation.

“Now you see why I don’t think I can perform my duties as Captain of the Guard.”

“Quite the contrary,” she countered, and motioned, “come along.”

He hesitated in surprise, and as he caught back up he asked, “What do you mean?”

They strode past two guards, who stood at attention as Celestia gestured to them. As soon as their Princess had passed, they resumed looking about. “I have NEVER seen the guards so alert,” she pointed out. “In addition, the magic of love from Cadence has made your own magic more powerful. Don’t think I haven’t noticed. And you have never been more dedicated. You would fight harder than ever to defend the palace, to protect her.”

“Yeah, I guess so,” he agreed, but still uncertain. “But what about my derelictions?”

“You are the most alert of all,” she praised. “You react to any threat almost within the second. I would say she’s training you. And it would be unfair to put you through such a rigorous program without a strong incentive. Honestly I am very impressed with your stealth, that you are now making love undetected in the most secure site in Equestria!”

She had another serious thought. “What would you do if you were suddenly faced with a changeling?”

“I don’t know. I wouldn’t be so eager to kill them. Now I see them as real ponies, like they are, not like monsters. And now I believe that they can be allies.”

“That’s how you feel.” She questioned again, “What would you actually do if one surprised you?”

He thought about it. “Well, I suppose, I would probably draw my blunt sword, knock them to the floor without hurting them, and,” he laughed, “probably kiss ‘em!”

“Naturally,” she smiled. “But that’s not bad. If you think about it, most of the threats that have faced our country have been defeated by friendship or love of some kind.”

They stepped onto a balcony with a sweeping view of Canterlot and the mountains beyond. She continued to observe, “It’s unlikely we will face a changeling threat again. You have defended us from them more surely than our entire security system ever could. Your marriage to her was the greatest increase to the safety of the kingdom since Luna returned to us. Diplomacy will prevent more wars than the sword can win.”

“Your relationship and your children assure me that there will be greater understanding between our races.” She mused with a clever smile, “As long as you are on duty, we can probably count that Chrysalis is guarding the castle as well!

The Princess looked him in the eye and said most sincerely, “Thank you, Shining Armor. I have never felt so safe.”

“I’m honored,” he could only reply, and after a moment he turned from her gaze to look out over the country he protected with a contented smile. A gust of wind blew his mane about, and a bell rang in the city below.

“I guess since you’re wearing two swords, you’ve got four,” the Princess commented offhand.

“Hm?” His focus returned to the balcony, as he suspected he misunderstood something.

“You’re pretty well endowed,” she continued. “It takes a lot of stallion to husband both of those ripe mares. And you’re handsome, too, I can see why they chose you.”

His blush returned fiercely, and he did not look at her. “I… uh—“

“It may seem foolish, but sometimes I wish things had happened differently, so I could have you,” she cooed, and bent down to nuzzle his neck.

He froze. “But… whoah-uh…”

There was a roar and a flurry of motion. In a moment he was tackled to the ground, with teeth around his throat. Celestia was gone, and a menacing black form pinned him and warned him from resisting with a clicking growl.

Chrysalis released him and flashed a wide smile, still on top of him. His momentary shock gave way to annoyance. “You looked away from her, and the sounds gave us an opportunity. You should be more vigilant,” she chided jokingly. “It was such a rush! You’re giving me the best hunts I’ve ever had!” She drew her face nearer and said in a more tender tone, “Thank you.” They kissed.

Celestia grinned without reservation, something she rarely used to do, as she peeked around the wall she had hidden behind. The house had never been so lively. The lovers kissed and licked and caressed, and rolled on the ground. With a flick of her tail, the Princess turned and walked away, humming as if she had seen nothing.