Ophidiophobia

by ClanCrusher

Rating: everyone
Tags: Fluttershy, Twilight Sparkle, Discord, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 3451

Turning to Fluttershy for help with her phobia had been a good idea at the time, but Discord has a way of making even the best checklists fall apart...

When logic and reasoning fail to make a dent in her phobia of snakes, Twilight turns to the one pony who knows more about fear than anypony alive. Fortunately she's happy to help. Unfortunately, Discord is also happy to help in his own way. Now Fluttershy is caught in between a unicorn more frightened than herself and a draconequus all too willing to make things worse.

With thanks to MisterGunpowder for proofreading and editing.

Published 2014-07-21 18:30:03 UTC
Last updated 2014-07-21 18:30:03 UTC

It Just Had To Be Snakes...

Twilight stared at The Book, mentally capitalizing the letters in her mind. It wasn't a great book. It wasn't even very good. Strictly speaking it barely even qualified as a book; perhaps photo album would have been more appropriate. As of right now though, this book was the most important book ever. Her horn glowed and the pages fluttered past. Knowing the page by heart now, she stopped just before it turned over.

“Come on Twilight, deep breath...you can do this. You faced down Discord, Nightmare Moon, and King Sombra...this is nothing, right?” Closing her eyes tightly she slowly turned the last page with her hoof, cracking an eyelid as the monstrosity came into view. The body was slim and seemed to defy the laws of physics as it twisted its way over the page, curling lazily around a tree branch and ending in a slim pointed head and mouth with beady yellow eyes that appeared to glow even on the page. The mouth of the creature was slightly open as well, a long forked tongue slipping between a pair of razor sharp fangs that-

SLAM!

Twilight let out a breath. Her legs were trembling and her tail was twitching from side to side. Very slowly she took another breath, letting it out gently before taking her hooves off of the book.

“So did you actually get to five seconds this time?”

“Gah! Spike! I told you not to do that while I'm...studying this,” she snapped at him.

“You know I really don't understand how you can face down a dragon but can't even look at a picture of a s-”

Her magical aura snapped into existence, wrapping around the young dragon and sealing his mouth shut. “Don't you dare say it,” she growled, her eyes glowing ominously. “For your information I managed a full point thirty-two seconds this time. I'm getting better!”

Spike glared at her until she finally released her magic and let him down. “Twilight, you've been at this for a week.”

“Six days with steady improvement each day,” she retorted. “If I continue my morning exercises then by my calculations I should be ready to face them within...” She paused as she added the numbers up. “Seventy-two years. I think that's a reasonable frame of time.”

Spike groaned and slapped a claw to his forehead. “There's nothing reasonable about that Twilight! What happened to that checklist you made? You said it was three simple steps and guaranteed to work.”

There was a pause. The mare's eyes shifted from side to side. “I don't know what you're talking about.”

Spike looked at her innocently. “Oh really? So this checklist I found hidden behind a dozen reference books isn't yours?” He held up a scroll in his claws tied neatly with a ribbon.

“How did you find- I mean, I don't know what that is,” she said, suddenly nervous.

“You taught me too well Twilight, I always pull out the books and dust the shelves properly,” he boasted. “So why haven't you followed this, huh? Seems like a pretty foalproof plan.”

“Because it's scary, alright?” she snapped. “They're not natural! They're monsters!” Her magic ripped the scroll from Spike's unresisting hand and flung it into a pile of papers where it was promptly buried.

“Twilight, you're getting obsessed again...”

“I have not! I've just been very diligent in my studies on the subject.”

Spike took a breath to respond but then stopped and changed his mind. “Alright, you win. I'm going out for a bit.”

The unicorn's eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Where to?”

“Oh, nowhere in particular. Maybe Pinkie's place. Maybe tell her about a certain friend of mine that's struggling with a problem that she's too embarrassed to share with anypony else.”

“You wouldn't dare...”

“I mean, I wouldn't tell her exactly what was wrong since I'm not the type to go around spilling secrets, but I'm sure she'd be incredibly concerned and desperate to help in any way she could,” he continued in an impressively casual tone.

“I could have you grounded you know.”

“And I have pens, paper, claws, and Celestia's address,” retorted Spike.

Twilight visibly deflated. “You're serious about this, aren't you?”

“Just think of it as an opportunity to study friendship again. This one can be about interventions.”

Grumbling all the while about cheeky assistants, Twilight grabbed the list from the pile and unrolled it. “Step one...find Fluttershy.”

Fluttershy's ears perked up as she heard a very quiet knock at the door, recognizing it almost immediately as the type of knock that one was hoping would go unanswered. Mentally apologizing for disappointing the pony on the other side of the door, she opened it to find Twilight there, her face set with a look of determination.

“Oh hello Twilight, it's wonderful to see you,” greeted the pegasus kindly. “Was there something that...um...” Her words trailed off as she saw the unicorn take a look around as if worried that someone might be watching them. Seemingly satisfied that nothing was around, her horn glowed and a book was slowly drawn out of her saddlebag, her magic making the pages fly until they settled upon the one she'd been looking over that morning.

“A snake?”

A small tremor moved up Twilight's body. Jerkily, she nodded her head. “I don't understand, are you trying to take care of one?

“No! Dear Celestia, no!” Taking a calming breath Twilight closed the offending book and hid it away. “Look, Fluttershy, you're the only pony I can turn to for this.”

“M-me?” she squeaked.

“Yes, you. You're good with animals. And I'm not good with...snakes.”

“I see, you want me to help you with your ophidiophobia,” said Fluttershy, her eyes lighting up. “Or is this a more general case of herpetophobia?”

“You know about those?” asked Twilight, impressed.

“Oh yes, I'm quite well versed in the particulars of phobias,” said the pegasus with a warm smile.

“Huh...I guess I really shouldn't be surprised about that,” murmured Twilight. “A-anyways yes, I need help with my ophidiophobia.” Clearly she was more comfortable using the clinical term.

“Of course, I'd be happy to help,” said Fluttershy sweetly. “How far have you come along?”

“I can almost look at a picture of one,” she said proudly.

“Oh dear...”

Pulling out the checklist from her bag, Twilight marked the second item on the list as Fluttershy prepared her materials. Step two, ask Fluttershy for help, complete.

“Now these are a few pictures of baby snakes. They might be a bit easier to handle,” said the pegasus patiently as she sat on the opposite end of the living room from Twilight who was pressed firmly against the wall.

Twilight had to squint to see the first picture. It was definitely a snake, but barely longer than an inch. There was no way something like that could ever wrap tightly around a pony and squeeze the life out of them while their mouths opened up to-

Raising a hoof, Twilight smacked her forehead to dislodge the thought. “O-okay, I think I can handle this,” she murmured, scooting closer to get a better look at the picture. Fluttershy seemed to have taken care to get an impressive amount of flowers in the image as well, surrounding the monstrosity with all things cute and beautiful to offset it.

After five minutes the unicorn was sitting at a more comfortable distance and even the tremors in her body were lessening. “Are you ready for me to change the picture?” prompted the pegasus.

“Y-yes, I think I'm ready,” Twilight responded, taking a deep breath as Fluttershy prepared to flip to the next one in the stack.

It was another baby snake, this one relaxing in the sun on a rock in the middle of a grassy field with part of Fluttershy's cottage in the background. “Did you take these yourself?”

“Oh yes, I keep careful records on all of the animals I take care of,” explained the pegasus. “Are you ready for the next picture? This one is juuuust a little bit bigger,” she warned.

Twilight sucked in a breath and nodded, mentally bracing herself. Fluttershy briefly saw her eyes widen at the sight and her body tense up.

“AHHHHHHH!” With a speed that might have impressed Rainbow Dash, Twilight flung herself from the chair and hid beneath the couch, only her eyes visible.

“Twilight? What's wrong? It's only slightly bigger...” Turning the picture around her words trailed off. “Oh...oh my...” Instead of a baby snake the picture she was holding depicted a young unicorn who had been wrapped several times by a comically large boa, a look of abject terror on her face as the snake's mouth had opened wide in preparation to consume the constricted pony.

“How did that one get in there?” she asked nervously. Looking around the room, Fluttershy's eyes narrowed and her voice became firm. “Discord! Get out here right now!”

Beneath the couch a second pair of eyes opened up. “Drat.”

One pair of eyes narrowed on the other and Twilight's voice came out sounding quite angry. “You!” There was a thump and a yelp, the couch shaking before Discord was unceremoniously booted out from beneath with a pair of hoof marks on his face. A violet flash later and Twilight was standing in front of him, her eyes blazing with fury.

“Oh when I'm done with you you're going to be begging for that stone prison!” she growled, her horn glowing, every loose object in the house starting to rise into the air as the power of her magical aura grew.

“But Twilight, we can't fight here,” said the draconequus as he wiped away the bruises on his face. “What would poor Mr. Slithers think?”

“Who?” Something poked Twilight's flank. Her head snapped to the side to see a modestly sized snake staring back at her wide eyed and open mouthed, exaggerated fangs poking out that gleamed with the help of Discord's magic.

Twilight screamed and the grip her magic had on all the objects vanished, filling the house with several crashes as all of the levitating objects were dropped back into place, briefly drowning out Discord's laughter at the sight of the unicorn being chased back and forth across the room by the conjured snake.

“Discord!” The sharp sound from Fluttershy made everything in the house stop. Slowly his head turned towards her, his face wincing slightly as he met her gaze. With a sigh, he snapped his claw and the snake disappeared while most everything in the house righted itself, the broken objects reforming and moving back into place while the pictures she was holding reverted back to their natural form.

With her mane slightly tussled and her horn trailing a bit of smoke, Twilight glared at the draconequus. “Death...is too good for you. I'm going to stick you in the deepest part of Tartarus!”

“Twilight, please calm down, Discord didn't mean to go overboard like that...right?”

“Yes, yes of course. It was just a little bit of fun,” he insisted, holding up a placating claw.

“And Twilight isn't going to banish anyone...right?”

“No...but I might send a strongly worded letter to Celestia. She's good at imprisoning things,” responded the unicorn sourly.

Fluttershy carefully ignored that comment and quickly sought out the positives that Discord's presence could provide. “Since you're here though, maybe you can help us,” she said with growing confidence.

“I can?”

“He can?”

“Well yes, you see I have a family of snakes right now, but they're a bit too big for Twilight to handle. Perhaps you could bring some smaller-”

“No need to say anymore friend Fluttershy, one baby snake coming right up!” With a snap of his claws and a poof of smoke, a baby snake appeared in the air looking like a perfect copy of the ones shown in Fluttershy's picture before landing on Twilight's head.

“Ahhhhh! Get it off! Get it off!” There was a crash as Twilight ran into a wall and then into a small table in a desperate attempt to remove the panicked snake.

“Discord, I think that might be a bit too much for her to handle right now,” said Fluttershy patiently, wincing as she heard a loud crash coming from her kitchen.

“Nooo! It's wrapping around my horn! It's going to eat meeee!”

“Do you really think the full-spectrum shield is necessary?” asked Fluttershy kindly as she looked at her friend. She didn't know a whole lot about magic, but she could feel the energy radiating off of her as the violet shield remained in place, giving her form a slightly blurred look. Twilight didn't respond.

“O-okay, well just try to look at the snake this time. Observe it in its natural habitat,” she advised as the unicorn pressed a pair of binoculars to her eyes, observing the miniscule dot that was slithering through the grass. All she received in return was a curt nod.

A minute passed and then two. Finally Fluttershy broke the silence. “Well?”

“It's actually kinda hard to see past the bright violet color. Maybe going full spectrum is a bit overboard.”

“Twilight!”

“Right! Sorry, sorry...dropping it...” she mumbled, the shield disappearing as she looked in the binoculars once again.

“Twilight?”

“Yes?”

“Take the caps off.”

“Nnhhh...do I have to?” Her meek smile quickly wilted under Fluttershy's stare.

Despite all odds and Discord's presence, things were steadily starting to improve. While a glacier might have crawled forward faster than Twilight moved towards the snake, she no longer had to use the binoculars to see it. All the while Fluttershy stayed next to her, gently encouraging her, eternally patient with a friend trying to overcome a phobia.

“You're making remarkable progress,” encouraged Fluttershy, gently rubbing a hoof over Twilight's back in an attempt to relieve her stress. Part of that stress was Discord's fault. For the past two hours he had been very good at following Fluttershy's exact instructions, being warm and pleasant all the while and not causing any mischief at all. It had made the unicorn deeply suspicious.

“He's planning something, I know he is,” she grumbled as she observed the lazy snake resting in the sun.

“He's not important right now Twilight, this is about you,” said Fluttershy, trying to bring her mind back to the task. “Now why don't you climb down from the tree? He's sleeping right now so this is the perfect time to observe him.”

Gulping loudly, Twilight reminded herself of the third and final check box on her list. Number three, do everything Fluttershy tells you to do. The agony of dealing with snakes and the agony of going against one of her lists fought inside of her before her list won out and the unicorn gently slid down the tree, carefully approaching the baby snake and stopping once she was a foot away.

Mentally, Fluttershy began to count down numbers in her head. It had taken some time, but eventually she'd been able to figure out just how long it took Twilight to move on to each stage and just how far she was willing to go each time.

“Are you ready to try one that's a teeeny bit bigger now?”

Twilight opened her mouth to loudly protest only to be silenced with a stare and a pointed nod towards the sleeping snake. Nodding and swallowing she whispered instead. “N-not too big now...”

Fluttershy looked up towards the draconequus who had been lounging in a tree above them the whole time and nodded. Without looking, he snapped his claw and the snake swelled in size. Now it was as big as the one in her picture book, though it had a much softer color scheme and was still asleep.

Each step was getting easier for the unicorn as well, her trembling almost non-existent as she looked at the larger snake. “This is as big as they get in Ponyville,” said Fluttershy encouragingly. “If you're okay with this then none of them should give you any trouble.”

Nodding, Twilight reached out a shivering hoof and gently touched the scales, immediately snapping her leg back as if afraid it would wake up from the touch. Gently, Fluttershy took her hoof in her own and drew her forward again, helping her stroke the snake's body, feeling the unicorn tremble as a few hisses escaped and a forked tongue flicked out.

“Go ahead and put up your shield and let's wake him up.”

Twilight nodded and snapped her shield into place as Fluttershy gently coaxed the snake into waking up. Even though it was conjured through Discord's magic she still treated it like one of her animals and it reacted as such, nuzzling her cheek as it blinked sleep from its eyes. Inside the shield Twilight couldn't hear as well, but she saw the snake turn to face her at the pegasus' prompting and tried her best not to recoil.

Finally after ten minutes of watching Fluttershy play and talk with the snake, Twilight lowered her shield and relaxed her legs. “Now just stay still Twilight. I promise you everything is going to be okay,” she said before smiling at the snake.

Body tense, the unicorn waited as the snake slowly slithered off of the rock, sliding through the grass in very slow and deliberate motions while Twilight tried not to make a sound. Approaching within an inch of her, the snake leaned forward and rubbed its head against her hoof before slipping away. Once it was out of sight, the pony collapsed onto the ground, breathing heavily.

“I...I did it...” she murmured to herself, surprised. She was even more surprised when Fluttershy floated down and gave her a hug, joy written all over her face.

“Yes, you did! Congratulations!” She was almost as happy as if she'd gotten over the fear herself and her good mood was infectious.

Returning her smile, Twilight put a leg around the pegasus and pulled her into a hug. “Thanks Fluttershy, I don't think I could have done this without you.”

“Ahem?”

“And...Discord I guess,” she grumbled.

“Well, you're um...not quite done yet. This was only the first step, but it was a really really big step,” she said encouragingly. “I'll be ready to help you again anytime you're free.”

“Thanks Fluttershy, I'll be sure to take you up on that.” The two ponies shared in the moment of friendship while above the draconequus made a few gagging sounds that they carefully ignored.

A Couple Days Later...

Twilight smiled as she opened up the book to the picture of the snake, no longer trembling. Fluttershy's training had done wonders even in so short a time and while she would probably never like snakes, she could stand to be around them...so long as there weren't too many.

“Spike! Let's go over the daily checklist!” she called out to her assistant, gently closing the book before making her way downstairs for breakfast. Outside, Discord grinned as he summoned a large sturdy box into existence with holes in the top and an intimidating lock.

Poofing into existence next to her doorway, the draconequus gently set the box down in front before adding some finishing touches. A tag with Twilight's name on it, a ribbon that wrapped around the box, a bit of magic to conceal the holes, and a quick color modification spell that turned it pink instead of the steel gray that it had been before.

With the preparations complete Discord reached for the door and paused, unable to find a bell to ring. Not letting a small detail get in the way, the draconequus conjured one and pressed it, a pleasant chime ringing through Twilight's house as he quickly vanished into the air.

Moments later the door was opened by a confused Twilight. “Huh, I didn't even know I had a doorbell...not that anypony even knocks.” She paused upon seeing the box addressed to her, and while Fluttershy's name wasn't on it, she recognized her hoofwriting in the way her name was written.

“Must be those books I asked for,” she reasoned, levitating the heavy case inside. “She must have had it delivered.”

Horn glowing, Twilight undid the bow and the paper before placing the provided key in the lock and letting it click open.

Dear Celestia,

I would greatly appreciate if you would be able to send me any relevant texts that the Canterlot library might have on the subject of raising and caring for a young Medusa along with anything that might allude to how long a magical imprinting lasts for such creatures.

Your Faithful Student,

Twilight Sparkle

P.S. Discord is a jerk.