Bah, normal day for me. I dragged myself out of bed at the crack of dawn. I had put off getting up as long as I could, but finally rolled out into the pain... I got dressed, then gulped some cereal down, then headed to work. I don't like mornings, they just hurt...
Work was ok, it's just hard with everything else. And it would be easier if I wasn't just shoveling dollars into someone else's pocket.
At least today was Friday; I got off a few hours early. After work, I jogged my mile and a half, ate half of a sandwich for lunch, then drove to a local diner for some soda and ice. That's dessert.
On the way back, I parked somewhere and wrote for a while. That didn't hurt. Writing is one of the few things I can do and not hurt... I enjoy writing.
Our subdivision is next to a state park. I drove home, then took a break from writing and I headed off, up the path. It slowly climbs a substantial hill, and the view is nice. The hike is not, since our town is built on a huge sand dune. Walking up hill, in sand, is a good workout, but not fun.
I'm not sure why, but I usually look down when I walk. I could say it is so I can watch for snakes, but there's probably other reasons.
It was early afternoon, and a sunny, warm day. I was halfway up the hill, and a large shadow passed overhead. It looked like I caught the shadow of the outer edge of the wing of a large bird in my field of view, as I looked down at the sand.
I quickly looked up, but was in a part of the path where bushes taller than I grew on both sides of the path. I figured it was a vulture. Maybe he knew how I felt.
I kept walking, looking down. I don't even remember what I was thinking about.
"Please stop, but please don't turn around. Are you Shysage?" The voice came from behind me.
Well, I did stop, and I did not turn around.
I need to explain a thing or two as my thinking proceeded very rapidly here.
First, I really didn't spend much time deciding how I should respond. I just answered with the first question that jumped into my head.
"Are you Summer?"
...
"Yes..."
...
Secondly, I was thinking this part through even before I heard her answer. Summer Rain is not a canon character, and so nopony has ever heard her voice. However, as much dialog as I had written for her, I had developed a pretty good idea what her voice should sound like...
...And that's exactly what I heard...
I actually froze briefly, then I sighed, then paused in thought. I really didn't know what to do. She asked me not to turn around, so I wouldn't.
Well, I wasn't scared, anyway, that's for sure. Summer would never scare me. She was a Fluttershy after all.
"Oh, Summer..." I said, this just came out.
"Oh, Shysage..." She said this almost before I was done. It was clear this was spontaneously what she felt, not a response to what I had said.
...
"Summer, why are you here?" I asked softly.
"I'm not sure, but I wanted to find you. You thought me up... You made me... You wrote me into existence..." Summer said.
I thought for a minute, then replied "Summer, I also made Shysage, as a character, just like I made you. Is he not there?"
Summer's response sent chills up my spine...
"Shysage, during our stories, he is, but when they are done, he is gone... ...I think, because he is you... ...and you are here... I think that's why I'm here now, too... I wanted to find him... I wanted to find you..."
There was a minute's silence maybe.
"Summer, how can I help you..." I asked
"I don't know. I am glad I found you, at least. Beyond that, I just don't know..." she said.
And it was more clear everytime she spoke that she really was Summer. And I had no idea how. Talking to a fictional character I had created, and wrote extensively about, was very disconcerting.
But I absolutely did NOT want her to leave...
"Is there a limit to how long you can be here?" I asked, not sure why I even asked.
"I don't know that, either, I'm sorry..." Summer said quietly.
I thought again for a minute, then asked "Do you remember where you were before you came here?"
Summer thought for a minute, before answering. "Well, the Portal room, I think." She said, again quietly. "This morning, I think I was with you at Fluttershys, then we were all together at Princess Twilight's new Castle."
This was just eerie... That's what I was writing about before I decided to take a walk and head up this hill...
Well, I didn't want to move, and I didn't want Summer to leave, so I just sat down, right there in the middle of the path.
"Summer, I don't mind you being here, I just have a lot of questions, that's all. And I guess they don't all need to be answered either. But I'll be honest, I'm glad you are here." I sort of put these phrases together as I said this.
Anyway, I decided to just roll with this, assume she was who she said she was, and see where this went.
"Summer, which chapter is your favorite?" I asked.
She didn't take very long on this. "The last big one you wrote."
I blushed at this, because I knew which one she was talking about. I really liked how it came out, but it had quite a bit if 'physical' content, but with good reason.
"I saw that" Summer said laughing.
Hearing Summer's laugh was very moving, I won't lie. Her voice I hear as I write, but her laugh fit perfectly... I will never forget it...
I laughed too, though...
Still, my spine tingled again, because I had written the chapter she was referring to already. But I had not posted it before my walk. This meant that the chapters I wrote, became 'real' in Summer's reality, not when I posted them, but when I wrote them...
I realized that this made the most sense... ...Then I realized that none of this made any sense...
As well, even though Summer didn't know titles or chapter numbers, she knew the content very well...
"Summer, I would hug you if I could. Your laughter is amazing." This also just came out, it was how I really felt.
"I know, Shysage..." Summer replied softly.
Even so, I was really enjoying this. I had no agenda, and I realized that, just like Shysage in the stories, I really was trying to help Summer.
"And Summer, I really don't understand any of what is going on here, but being able to talk to you... I so appreciate that... I think I could stay here all day and talk to you. Still, if someone else came by, it would sound very wierd..." I said.
"Well, Shysage, being able to talk to you is amazing to me too..." Summer answered quietly.
"And I wish I could fly here too..." I said this, it also just came out. "Then we could fly together, maybe..." Summer and Shysage did that a lot in the stories I wrote... ...and in the chapter I worked on this morning...
It was quiet for a minute, then I asked "Well, which is the chapter you like the least?"
Again, Summer didn't need to think about this.
"The chapter you just re-wrote. Well ok, I like it, and I don't." Summer said, still trying to make up her mind. "Letting Discord off the hook for what he did, still seems so wrong to me. But, in your new version, we got to talk. I liked that..."
Well, we hugged a while too, in the re-written version; I understood her point, that was one of the reasons I liked the revised chapter 42 as well. It seemed to fill in a little more about the development of Summer and Shysage's growing friendship.
"Summer, can you see me?" I asked this, the idea came out of nowhere.
"Well, yes" She answered right away.
I thought for a minute, then said "Well, do I look like Shysage?"
Summer just laughed. "Of course, because you are Shysage."
"Well, that just means you look amazing just like Summer... Wait... because you are Summer..." I said this, knowing as I said it, that it made little sense.
Summer just laughed again.
"Oh Summer..." I said this, it just came out again...
I was thinking for a minute, then asked "Well, when I am not writing, and when you are not right here, where are you? Where do you appear to be?
"I don't know, Ponyville I think, but I'm not sure" Summer said quietly.
I realized that I probably should not mention that any more. It seemed to be troubling to Summer as much as it was a curiosity to me.
"Well Summer, let me just say this much. We need to be careful that nopony is around, but I really appreciate you being here. You can visit me any time you can work it out." And I honestly felt this way too.
"Thank you, Shysage. I understand there are other concerns, but you welcoming me into your world is so much how you are." Summer said, again softly.
"Summer, you're the only one I know who doesn't hurt me..." I said this very quietly, and also quickly, before I even had a chance to think it through. It was how I really felt though. That seemed to be happening a lot...
"I know Shysage..." she answered just as quietly. "I wish I could do more..."
"Oh Summer... You have already helped me so much..." I said. This was really true. Writing about Summer and Shysage was one of the few things I could do that I actually enjoyed.
It was quiet for a minute.
Summer then asked hesitantly "Shysage, is true friend real?"
"Summer, he is very real... Here too..." I answered with confidence.
"Summer answered "Good, because I am talking to him a lot..."
Summer began to cry...
I hurt for her... I couldn't help it... I quickly got up to hug her, and turned around...
...When I looked towards where she was...
...she was gone...
Well, I think I did see the very faint outline of where she had been sitting, as the beautiful pony that she is, I don't know...
I just stood there in silence for a few minutes, hearing only the wind rustling through the bushes...
"Maybe I am a psycho" I thought to myself...
Nah...
I never know what will happen when I go to sleep.
Sometimes I sleep fine. Other times, I wake up in the middle of the night, going over an existing scene that I am working on, or maybe a new scene that I still need to write. Sometimes, I actually wake up to an idea for a new story. Sometimes I just wake up and realize I am alone.
This particular night, I actually fell asleep quickly enough. But I woke up at maybe 3 a.m.., wide awake.
I guess I was waiting for some storyline to begin to flow through my head. I really didn't mind this part, it was just almost impossible to fall back asleep after my head worked through a chapter a few times.
Out of the Blue... "Shysage..." I heard next, quietly...
There is a low window next to my bed, and it was open all the way, and it sounded like the voice came from there. It was Summer's voice, of course.
"Summer, where are you?" I asked very quietly.
"I think I'm outside the window. I can hear you just fine, well quietly." she said back.
I just sighed at that point. I couldn't talk to her for very long through the window, or somepony else in the house would wake up and want to know what kind of dream I was having, or how much soda I had the last evening, or...
I thought a minute, then said quietly "Summer, I need you in here if we are going to talk. I am going to close my eyes, and you tell me when I can open them."
To be honest, I figured I would probably just fall back asleep.
Instead, after a little while, I am pretty sure I felt the added pressure on the blankets, of Summer sitting or laying down on top of the covers behind me.
"Is this better?" She whispered.
I just smiled, and whispered back "Yes, that's much better."
And by the way, I had no other plans or desires besides just talking to her. Besides, she was a pony, and I would never...
"You can open your eyes now, just don't turn around" She whispered softly.
It was quiet for a minute.
"Summer, I won't ask how you found me, but again, I'm glad you are here." I whispered.
"I'm glad I could come back, but I'm not really sure how I did it." she whispered, sounding slightly confused.
"Well, Summer, don't worry about it. Let's just take this as it comes" I whispered.
"That's easy for you to say" she whispered, then began to weep softly.
I fought the urge to hug her, and just said very quietly "Summer, I would hug you if I could."
"I know Shysage. And you are right, I should be glad I am here right now." She replied very quietly.
It was quiet for a minute or two.
The conversation that follows took place VERY quietly.
"Summer, do you think you will disappear if I touch you?" I asked.
Summer replied honestly "I don't know, but I don't really want to find out. It was really hard suddenly being taken away from you last time."
I could tell Summer was trying not to cry. I also knew that it was my fault...
"I'm sorry Summer, I just hurt for you when you cried" I said.
"I know Shysage, that's just the way you are. But it hurts more to have to leave like that, so..." Summer said, then stopped, again trying not to cry.
"Summer, I understand. And I don't ever want to hurt you." I said.
It was quiet for a minute or two.
"Shysage, do you mind me being here next to you?" Summer asked.
I think I almost laughed quietly, then I said "Oh, Summer... What hurts me the most is being alone. You bring light to my soul when you are here. I can't explain it. You can stay as long as you want."
I thought about this a minute, then added "And if I fall asleep, don't take it as a statement. It is just the middle of the night, and I suspect I will sleep better with you near."
"I know Shysage, and that's ok. I just enjoy being near you, so that is fine" Summer replied.
I thought about asking her what time of the day it was where she came from, but remembered that asking questions like that seemed to trouble her last time.
"Summer, do you remember what you said after I got my memory back in Fury Run?" I asked.
"I think you probably mean the part where I said that not being able to talk to you was maybe the hardest. Is this right?" she said slowly.
"Yes, Summer... I knew you would feel that way. And I honestly feel that way too, by the way. I still don't understand what is happening here, but if talking together is all we are ever able to do, that would be amazing to me" I replied.
"We are on the same page, Stallion" Summer said this then laughed, quietly.
I love her laugh.
I think Summer was thinking a minute here though.
"Shysage, I don't know if you know me so well because you wrote me that way, or if you just understand the way I am. It really is amazing though" Summer said.
"Well, I think I could say the same thing. You seem to be able to read me very well, and you didn't write me into being, so that is very amazing" I said back.
I thought for a minute, then just sighed...
"Summer, being able to talk to you is absolutely amazing..." I said quietly.
Still, having Summer there was very comforting... relaxing... I was falling asleep...
I woke myself up, and said softly "Summer, I am falling asleep. Still, I will probably sleep very well with you near."
She said back, just as softly "Shysage, it's ok if you sleep. Just being here is nice for me too.
I started to nod off again.
I woke up long enough to say "Thank you, Summer. I think I need you."
She said back "I need you too Stallion", and I think she gently nudged my back through the covers.
The pressure on the covers was still there, so I don't think she disappeared.
Still, in the morning, she was gone...
Another harsh day would soon begin...
...but later that afternoon, I found the screen for my window on the ground...
Author's Note
Hmm... I wrote this months ago...
