Sayonara, Zetsubou no Poni: Negativity is Magic

by Gallant Tempest

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Other, Comedy, Pinkie Pie, Slice of Life, Crossover
Length: 10685

A crossover between MLP:FiM and "Sayonara, Zetsubou Sensei".

Nozomu Itoshiki is a very depressed colt, who despairs against life as we know it. Matters aren't helped much by the fact that his evening classes consist of a group of less-than-sane ponies; including the eternally-optimistic Pinkie Pie.

(Crossover with Sayonara, Zetsubou Sensei)

Published 2012-06-03 20:04:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-06-03 20:04:02 UTC

Chapter 1: The Colt of Despair and the Optimistic Mare

“A very small degree of hope is sufficient to cause the birth of love.”
- Henri B. Stendhal, France (1783-1842)

It was the first day of spring, and Pinkie Pie bounced along the winding path of cherry blossoms with the cheerfully optimistic exuberance that she was well-known for. She beamed with a face-splitting grin, her heart brimming with hope for the future and the pleasant inkling that today was going to be an exciting and wonderful day. She stopped abruptly in her tracks, however, when she noticed something just a few feet ahead of her that contrasted sharply with the surrounding she was travelling through.

A colt was dangling from a nearby tree branch, strung up by the neck with a noose.

After a few moments of stunned silence, tears began to creep out of Pinkie Pie's eyes as she rushed forward and bounded into the air, grabbing onto the colt's waist and desperately attempting to yank him back down to the ground.

“NO!” she screamed aloud, “You can't do this, you can't! Please don't throw your life away!”

As she pulled harder and harder, the colt began to flail his forelegs in the air, gasping heavily as the noose swung through the air and tightened around his neck, choking him. This caused the remainder of the rope to be stretched tighter and tighter, until at last it snapped apart, flinging Pinkie Pie back a few feet as the colt collapsed to the ground; he gasped and spluttered loudly, reaching towards his neck with his front hooves as he knelt dazedly.

Pinkie Pie was sat upright, looking on in stunned silence; the only sounds to be heard in the forest were the sounds of birds chirping in the distance. Eventually, Pinkie stood up and began to trot over to the colt, but reeled back somewhat when he turned to her, eyes glaring.

“WHAT IF I HAD DIED?!” he screamed, gritting his teeth at the pink mare; then he froze, relenting slightly upon realising what words he had just spoken, as Pinkie's eyes widened at this revelation. Now that she got a closer look at him, Pinkie Pie could see that the colt's coat was a pale brown with a short-cropped black mane; his tail was also styled in such a fashion, and he wore a long patterned grey kimono that went down to all four of his knees – along with a pair of slim spectacles over his eyes.

Swallowing hard, the colt put on a dejected face and turned away from Pinkie. Sighing in a manner akin to frustration, he quietly muttered, “Once again...I did not die.” whilst shaking his head from side to side.

Perking up at this, Pinkie Pie trotted over to him and gently placed a hoof on his shoulder.
“But you just said 'What if I had died!'” she pointed out.

He pulled away from her and looked up wistfully at the tree he had been hanging from moments before, replying with “A pony such as I...does not deserve to live”.

Pinkie Pie tilted her head at this and smiled, saying “Silly! Nobody would try to kill themselves on such a wonderful day as today!” standing on her hind legs, she threw her forelegs up in a grand gesture, continuing with “Today is the first day of spring! New hopes, new dreams, and new joy are just waiting to be found around every corner!”

Dropping back down onto all fours, Pinkie Pie nodded towards a huge sprawling cherry blossom nearby and explained, “If you had killed yourself on a day like today, Pink Gabriel would never have forgiven you.”

The colt squinted at the tree upon hearing this, quietly repeating the name to himself thoughtfully. “Pink Gabriel...”

“Yep, Pink Gabriel!” Pinkie Pie chimed in, her usual excited demeanour quickly returning to her, “With her branches spreading out towards the sky, each one brimming with petals; like a pegasus spreading their wings! I decided to name her that just now!”

After a few moments of awkward silence, the colt turned his head to Pinkie Pie as a look of confusion spread across his face.
“Named...just now?”

“Yeah!” Pinkie Pie agreed, grinning. Suddenly she started bouncing from tree to tree, pointing to each one with her hoof as she went past. “And this one's Pink Young CEO, and this one's Pink Demon, Lord of Terror – and hey, let's name this one Fluttershy, that'll make for some great irony! Oh, and this one is...”

As Pinkie Pie continued her tirade of tree-naming, the colt tilted his head questioningly and raised his eyebrows in stunned confusion as but two simple thoughts crossed his mind; just who is this girl? And why is her method of naming the trees so inconsistent?

A short while later, Pinkie Pie bounced over to the colt, stopping closely in front of him. Placing one hoof under her chin, Pinkie Pie hummed quietly to herself.
“Now, let's see...what should I call you?”

Suddenly, a look of pure, unbridled joy swept across her face as she squealed “I've got it!”
Looking back towards the colt, she pointed her hoof towards him and exclaimed,
“Since you were dangling from Pink Young CEO, the perfect name for you would be…Pink Supervisor!”

The colt's jaw dropped as he heard this, aghast at what he had just been named by this complete and total stranger.
“P-Pink Supervisor?!” he stuttered.

“Yeppers! That's the name I picked, and that's the name that sticks!” Pinkie replied cheerfully, hopping up and down on the spot.

The look of shock remained on the colt's face, but his expression turned somewhat stern as he shook his head and spoke to her in a level voice.
“You know, you can't just go around naming things like that.”

Pinkie froze in mid-bounce, daintily drifting back down to the ground with a bemused look on her face. “Huh? Whaddya mean?”

The colt cleared his throat and continued. “You cannot simply name things as you please. Only those with power and money can name things in this world. Even then, you can only name certain things, such as sports stadiums…” his expression turned sour as he carried on, “yet one day this will change, and landmarks and towns will be able to be renamed; eventually, those who have the money would be able rename locations such as Ponyville, Canterlot and possibly even Equestria itself to their own desires!”

His eyes clenched tightly shut, the colt threw his head back and screamed at the top of his lungs,
“I'M IN DESPAIR! This pitiful, greedy, money-obsessed world has left me in despair!”

Turning back towards the tree, the colt pulled out both a small saddlebag and a small stool from behind the tree with his teeth, and slipped another noose out of the bag. After carrying the stool to where the branch was, he threw the rope up over the tree and, through a careful combination of using both his teeth and his hooves; he managed to tie the rope to the tree. Standing on his hind legs, he gripped the noose with his front hooves and glared towards Pinkie Pie.
“I would much rather go back to dying, thank you very much.” he spoke coldly.

Pinkie Pie looked forlorn and lost momentarily, but then cheered up and exclaimed “It's just like I said! Nobody would try and kill themselves on a wonderful day like today!”

The colt gave her a cold stare and replied in an icy tone, “Oh, really? Then what was I just attempting to do – and furthermore, what am I attempting to do now?”

Cocking her head to one side, Pinkie squinted at the colt for a few moments before beaming, her eyes widening as she excitedly replied “You were just...just...trying to make yourself taller!”

Upon hearing this, the colt let go of the noose and jumped down from the stool, trotting over to Pinkie Pie with a concerned look on his face.

“...what?” was the only response he could muster.

“Yeah! Yeah, that's it! You were just trying to make yourself taller! Although...” Pinkie placed her hoof on her chin, glaring thoughtfully at the colt for a few moments, “I don't see why you'd need to make yourself any taller. You seem just fine the way you are!”

Shaking his head frustratedly, the colt began to stammer “B-but I...I wasn't even...trying to...” before sighing and giving up, looking back towards the grinning pink pony with a look of annoyance on his face.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The colt that can only see things negatively...
The mare that can only see things positively...

...a meeting that should never have taken place.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Suddenly, Pinkie exclaimed “Oh, by the way; this is for you!” as she pulled out a small collection of coins from what seemed to be hammerspace with her hoof. “Four bits! That should be enough to pay the naming costs” she giggled.

The colt gasped slightly, looking down at the money with a mixed look of anger and surprise; he began reaching for the money, but then frowned and smacked the money out of Pinkie Pie's hoof, causing her to stumble back in shock. Gritting his teeth, the colt turned away and galloped off, screaming aloud “I...I was really trying to die, you stupid mare! And I'll never accept that name! Never!”

Once he was gone, Pinkie just gave an equine shrug and mumbled “What a strange pony. Oh, well!” before happily bouncing along through the forest and carrying on as she was before.

Many hours had long since passed now, and all of Ponyville was basked in the warm orange glow of the sunset. Humming joyfully to herself, Pinkie Pie was happily trotting towards the school, eager to begin the new evening classes she had enrolled in.

“I've never been to evening classes before. The bulletin board was kind of nondescript about what we were supposed to do in class...” Pinkie mused to herself, “but it sounds like it could be kinda fun! And maybe I'll get to meet some new ponies, too! Although really I doubt that, considering that I know every single pony in Ponyville-” Pinkie paused as she realised something she hadn't quite noticed before.

“Except for that one colt I met earlier today. I don't think I've ever seen him before.” At this point, Pinkie switched to her oft-used mode of transportation – overexcited bouncing – and began grinning to herself. “I'll have to ask everypony about this new pony, so that I can find out who he is and throw him a welcoming party!” she exclaimed happily.

After only a few minutes, Pinkie had reached the school. Noticing the door to be ajar, she reached forward with her hoof and pushed it open. Inside, she saw that the small, nine-seat classroom was already almost full; in fact, she was the last one there. Amidst the chatting members of the group she noticed quite a few familiar faces.

“Rarity! Twilight! Fluttershy! I didn't know you guys were taking these evening classes!” Pinkie yelled optimistically to her friends as she closed the door behind her, bounced over to her front-row seat and sat down.

“Hello, darling!” Rarity greeted Pinkie with a smile, “We were as surprised to see each other here as you were! Although I'm not exactly sure as to what the curriculum of the class will be, I thought I might as well try it out and see what its like,” she explained.

“Hey, that's just what I thought, too! Weird coincidence, huh?” Pinkie said exuberantly. Before anypony had a chance to respond, however, she barrelled on with “So, where's the teacher? Have any of you guys seen them yet?”

“Not yet,” Rarity admitted, “in fact, he appears to be running rather late, which I must say is rather unbecoming of a teacher...”

Just then, the school door swung open, and all heads turned towards the doorway as the teacher stepped through doorway. Pinkie's eyes widened with shock, however, when the realisation of whom it was hit her.

It was the same colt from earlier that morning.

“Good evening, class-” he began, but he froze the second he laid eyes upon Pinkie Pie.
“Y...you!”

Pinkie started waving her foreleg in the air excitedly, grinning happily at the colt that was the last pony she'd expected to see here.

“Pink Supervisor!” she exclaimed cheerfully.

Upon hearing this, various ponies began whispering amongst themselves.
“Pink Supervisor?”
“What kind of name is that?”
“Kinda weird, don't you think?”

Trotting over to the front of the room, the colt leapt on to his hind legs and slammed his forelegs onto his desk.
“Th-that's not my name! Pink Supervisor is not my name!” he shouted nervously, fearing for a bad first-time impression from his students.

“Uh...I don't think anybody ever really thought it was…” Twilight pointed out, the rest of the class murmuring in agreement at this – all except for Pinkie, who was just sitting there quietly and grinning at the teacher.

Shaking his head, the colt grabbed a pencil in his mouth and scribbled his name in kanji onto the flipchart. Stepping back, he tapped against the flipchart several times with the pencil before placing it down onto the desk and turning back to the class.

“My name is Nozomu Itoshiki. I am to be your teacher for these new evening classes, which I have organised myself along with help from Miss Cheerilee.”

“Huh. That’s an interesting name…and what’s with those symbols you drew, anyhow?” Pinkie inquired.

Turning to Pinkie Pie, Twilight explained “They’re kanji, Pinkie. It’s an alternate form of writing to the one we use here in Ponyville,” before turning back towards the teacher. “You must not be from around here, am I right?”

“You would be correct, Miss…”
“Twilight Sparkle, sir.”

“However,” Nozomu continued on glumly, “my name is the worst name that any creature in Equestria could have. You see, the kanji for my name is made of thirteen strokes, which I am sure you are all aware is often said to be an unlucky number. Furthermore, all the symbols in my name mean something that either relates to poor luck or misfortune.”
He sighed and shook his head despondently.

“If that’s the case, then why not try writing your name horizontally instead of vertically? I’m sure that would solve the problem.” Twilight suggested.

Nozomu looked towards Twilight with a panicked look on his face. “Well, you see…that might not be the best idea…”
“How so?” Twilight asked, a bemused expression crossing her face.
“Because…um, well…” Nozomu mumbled nervously.

Jumping out of her seat and in front of the flipchart, Pinkie Pie grabbed the pencil off of the nearby desk and started scribbling the name horizontally.

“Let me do it for you! It shouldn’t be too hard!” she exclaimed muffled through the pencil in her mouth.
“N-no, please…don’t!” Nozomu protested, but it was too late; Pinkie dropped the pencil back onto the nearest desk, and gave a cheerful “Tah-dah!” to what she had written.

Upon seeing what Pinkie had written, Twilight gasped in shock. “Zetsubou…but that’s the kanji for…” she gulped nervously, “…despair!”

Pinkie looked towards Nozomu with a surprised look on her face, as the rest of the class began mumbling to each other. “So that would make you…Mr. Despair!” she pointed out unhelpfully.

At this point, Nozomu had had enough. Snarling, he slammed is front hooves on the desk and pointed towards the door, screaming “That’s it! This class is dismissed! Everybody, get out right now!”

As the class emptied, Pinkie Pie stood in the doorway looking towards Nozomu, who had his head hung and turned away from the doorway.

“Mr. Despair? Are you coming?” she asked earnestly in a worried tone.

But Nozomu only shot her an angry glance and pointed towards the doorway.
“Out. Now.”

After Pinkie Pie had left closing the door behind her, Nozomu opened the drawer of his desk and pulled out a small glass, along with a bottle of whiskey, before proceeding to pour the whisky into the glass. Shaking his head, he quietly grumbled “Confound these ponies…” before downing the whole glass in a single go.

A few moments later, he sighed regretfully and placed the items back into the drawer, before exiting the classroom and locking it up for the night.

Chapter 2: Despairing on the Societal Effects of Cutie Marks

The classroom was awash in the cascading array of golden light wrought by the sunset, as the nine mares chatted contentedly amongst themselves; all eager for the arrival of their teacher, Mr. Nozomu Itoshiki, so that they could begin their evening classes. One could say “continue” but that would be foolish, considering that they had learnt little else but their teacher’s name in the lesson the week prior. The most confusing thing to everypony had been their teacher’s location in Ponyville; none of the mares present had seen him around town, nor really knew where he lived. Most of them, however, just shrugged it off as him being a somewhat asocial pony.

Soon the door to the classroom flung open, and Nozomu Itoshiki trotted over to the front of the classroom and towards his desk. A quiet hush descended upon the room as he entered; placing his saddlebags down by the side of his desk, he turned to the class and paused for a few moments before remarking, “Good evening, class. The express train to Appleloosa stopped running again today, didn’t it?”

This was met by the exchange of a few confused glances between the students before he added, “Not that that has any profound meaning or any relation to our curriculum…”

Suddenly Pinkie Pie leapt out of her seat, reached into hammerspace once again and threw four small gold coins onto the desk, beaming excitedly all the while. A confused look crossed Nozomu’s face momentarily; then understanding dawned and he sighed in frustration, shaking his head.

“So, this is for today, is it?” he inquired dejectedly.

“That’s right, Pink Supervisor!” Pinkie replied, bouncing back to her seat with hyperactive glee.

Reaching onto the desk, he slid the coins into the open saddlebag by the desk’s side.

“Mr. Itoshiki, you can’t seriously be accepting her offer!” Twilight remarked with scepticism, arching an eyebrow.

“Well, I am,” he replied flatly.

“But if you give up now, you’ll only encourage her!” she pointed out.

“Well, sometimes it’s best to know when to give up,” he sighed morosely, “Anyway, it’s time for roll-call,” he pulled out the class register from the top drawer; gripping the pencil in his mouth, he began calling out each name on the list. “Pinkie Pie?”

“Yeppie-deppie!” she replied enthusiastically. Nozomu groaned at this for a moment before continuing.

“Twilight Sparkle?”; “Present.”
“Rarity?”; “Here.”
“Fluttershy?”; a slight pause. “Fluttershy?”

After a few moments, a voice timidly whispered “Um…here.”

“Ah, good. Ditzy Doo?”; “Here!”

“Lyra?”; “Yeah!”
“Bon Bon?”; “Lyra! Don’t be some impolite- Here!”

“Colgate?”; “Yes, sir!”

“Berry Punch?”; “Uh-huh.”

Placing the register in the drawer once again, Nozomu commented “Well, looks like that’s everybody. Now, today we will begin our curriculum with a lesson focused upon the study of cutie marks.”

“A Cutie Mark is, simply put, a mark that appears on a pony’s flank when they discover their one true special talent – a unique talent that sets them apart from all other ponies-”

“Um, Mr. Itoshiki?” Twilight interrupted, “We already know all this. It’s pretty common knowledge,”; there were general murmurs of agreement.

“Ah, well…”, he faltered, before continuing, “However, what is interesting to consider are the social implications of cutie marks. For example, if one lacks a cutie mark as a young foal, then they may be derided by their peers as “blank flanks” and mocked for such a thing. This, however, is quite uncommon, and when a foal finally obtains his or her mark the future possibilities that mark brings will fill them with newfound hope…” he froze for a moment, and he turned his face downwards; then, he lifted his head back up and fixed the class with a frustrated and despondent gaze.

“Hope?!”, he yelled, “There is no such thing as hope! There is only despair in this cruel, harsh world! Those without marks are made light of by those who have them, and as such are pressured into finding their future life path before their time comes! And what if they find what they believe to be their one true calling, then find it is not so? Then they are stuck with such a mark, defining a talent that is not truly theirs to cherish and thus they are forced to spend the remainder of their days cultivating a talent that brings them only sorrow and anguish!”

He slammed his eyes shut and tilted his head skywards, screaming at the top of his voice, “I’M IN DESPAIR! This society where one’s life is defined by the appearance of mark on their flank that they have no control over has left me in despair!”

After a long, awkward silence where everypony’s jaw hung wide open in disbelief – sans Pinkie, who was simply giggling and rolling her eyes – Twilight nervously said, “Um…sorry to interrupt, but cutie marks don’t work like that. They only appear when you realise your love for a special talent that is uniquely yours and yours alone. I doubt that a pony would be stuck with a mark that they would hate throughout their entire lives.”

Nozomu shot her an irritated glare, “Are you completely certain of that? I mean, have you ever met such a pony?”

“Well, no…but like I said, cutie marks just don’t work that w-“

“Then how can you be sure?!”, he interrupted hysterically, “I should just end my life right now, and escape from such a pressurised society! Perhaps I will be reborn as a buffalo, where one needs not fear the possibilities or consequences of a cutie mark…”

He began slowly trotting towards his open saddlebags – as he leaned towards them, however, he stumbled forwards and landed flat on his face, causing part of his kimono to slip forwards slightly; revealing both his flank and the cutie mark adorned to it.

At least, it would have done, had Nozomu Itoshiki not lacked said cutie mark in the first place.

Everypony in the classroom gasped in surprise; “P-pink Supervisor! You don’t have a cutie mark!” Pinkie squealed, stating the blatantly obvious.

He staggered up and quickly pulled the kimono back over his flank, before he hung his head despairingly and exclaimed, “Now you know my terrible secret! I have no cutie mark!”; he then slumped down onto his haunches, sighing in mild annoyance.

Pinkie Pie hopped over to Nozomu and placed a hoof on his shoulder; “Why so glum?”, she inquired. “This means that you’ve still got the wonderful opportunity of getting your cutie mark!” she giggled cheerfully.

“But to do that,” he pointed out dejectedly, “I would have to have some inkling as to what my special talent could be. The only thing that I really enjoy is teaching; yet that doesn’t seem to bring me any closer to obtaining my cutie mark…”

“Well, perhaps it’s a certain kind of teaching,” Twilight pointed out, “I mean, instead of just teaching generally, you may be more adept at educating people on a more specific subject.”

“Yeah, Twilight’s right!” Pinkie added, “Maybe your special talent isn’t teaching students about a whole bunch of stuff, but rather teaching them about a certain something!”

For a long while, silence filled the room; eventually, Nozomu sighed and glanced back towards Pinkie, an impossibly faint glimmer of hope in his eye. “Well…I suppose it couldn’t hurt to try…” he admitted.

Leaping joyfully into the air, Pinkie proclaimed “Yeah! That’s the spirit!” before turning to face the class; “Does anypony have any suggestions for what Pink Supervisor would be good at teaching?” she asked, causing Nozomu to wince at the continued mention of his unfortunate nickname.

“Maybe he’d be good at teaching science?” Lyra suggested, giving an equine shrug in the process.

“Unlikely; while I do sometimes enjoy partaking in some of the sciences, I’m not really that interested in delving deeper into the subject matter than a general understanding of them,” he stated bluntly.

“What if he was a mathematician?” Colgate queried.

“I doubt it,” Nozomu retorted, “I lack interest in the more advanced areas of mathematics, anyway.”

“He could be a muffin salesman!” Ditzy exclaimed excitedly.

“I’m not sure that I would-“; he momentarily paused before turning to Ditzy with a puzzled look, “What, exactly, does that have to do with teaching?

Ditzy lowered her head ashamedly, “It was just a suggestion…and anyway, maybe you’re someone who’s great at cooking?”

“Hardly. The majority of the dishes I prepare are more often than not mediocre at best” Nozomu flatly responded, putting himself down once more.

And so an hour passed, each student suggesting a potential teaching career for Nozomu and each in turn being shot down in flames, causing a depressive air to permeate the classroom and infect all within; sans Pinkie Pie, of course.

“Does anypony else have any suggestions?” Pinkie asked the class; the despondent collective sigh from her classmates was taken as a clear enough response.

“That’s it…I give up,” Nozomu muttered; “There’s no point in going on any further with this life; I’m unlikely to find my special talent in this lifetime, in any case.”

“Aw…but there’s so much out there to see and do, Pink Supervisor! You’ve just go and give it your all!” Pinkie cheerfully quipped.

Nozomu shot her an irritated glare. “Don’t you know what the phrase ‘give up’ means?” he bitterly remarked.

“Yeah, but…I prefer to use the phrase ‘Just keep trying’!” she joyfully explained, “After all, just because teaching isn’t your forté doesn’t mean that you should give up completely! What if your special talent is something that you didn’t even think of yet?”

Nozomu pondered this for a moment; then shrugged, “Either way, I think I’d rather go ahead and die, anyway.” He pulled a noose out of his saddlebag with his teeth and flung it towards the ceiling, where it hung over one of the wooden rafters.

“Ditzy, could you tie this noose to the rafter, please?” Nozomu asked; Ditzy nodded emphatically, tying the end of the rope to the rafter, leaving the noose dangling a few inches from the desk. After she flew down to her desk, she joined the class in watching Nozomu clamber on the desk and stand on his hind legs as he grabbed the noose; suddenly they all sat up anxiously, as the full realization of what he was about to do kicked in.

Pinkie Pie noticed their anxiousness and commented “Don’t worry, he won’t really do it! He just likes to try and make himself taller, that’s all!” in an attempt to calm them, though her joyful reassurance sounded hollow even to herself.

Nozomu began to raise the noose towards his neck, quietly remarking “This pitiful world of despair…”; after his remark, however, there was a dull flash of light from towards his flank. Feeling an odd tingling sensation from that area, Nozomu let go of the noose and dropped back onto all fours, lifting up his kimono in the process – and revealing his newly-obtained cutie mark.

It was the image of a rope noose.

As the class simply sat frozen in shock, Pinkie excitedly squealed, “Pink Supervisor! You finally got your cutie mark! That must mean your special talent is making yourself taller!”; after a momentary pause, she placed her hoof to her chin and added “Or maybe it means your special talent is despairing about everything, or teaching suicidally depressing lessons, or…”

Nozomu interrupted her with a mixed shriek of shock, joy, anger, and – of course – despair. “That’s it!” he yelled, “Now I really am going to do it!”

He threw his kimono back over his flank and stood back onto his hindquarters, lowering the noose onto his neck once more. Pinkie suddenly leapt towards him, her eyes filled with terror.

“NO! Don’t do it!” she cried.

Pinkie barrelled into Nozomu, causing him to stumble forwards a step or two; as she collapsed onto the desk, he fell forward as the noose tightened around his neck. His body was still for a moment after, save for the gentle sway of the noose. The class all held their breath in horror…

Then Nozomu began to cough and splutter; as he jerked his head back up, he shot his students an enraged glare as he screamed “What if I had died?!”

They all let out a sigh of relief, thankful that their teacher wasn’t dead; Ditzy flew up and undid the knot on the rafter, causing Nozomu to collapse onto the floor, before she then helped Nozomu back onto his feet. After berating Pinkie Pie for her foolishness and returning her to her seat, Nozomu proceeded to conclude the lesson.

“Well…in conclusion, a cutie mark is something truly unique and wonderful. You never know where or when you’ll get it, and you may not even be sure what it means – but nonetheless, it is still something which defines you as a pony, and there’s no denying that it brings a feeling of joy to you in its uniqueness. All right, class dismissed.”

After this, they all began to quickly file out of the classroom and head for home. As Pinkie reached the door last, however, she heard Nozomu call out her name; “Pinkie Pie?”

She stopped for a moment, turning her attention back towards the front desk, “Yes, Pink Supervisor?”

Nozomu winced at the nickname again; then let out a small smile, “Thanks for helping me find my cutie mark today. That was really kind of you,” the smile left his face as he narrowed his gaze “even if you almost killed me doing so.”

“Aw, don’t mention it!” she replied ecstatically, before she bounced through the classroom door in her usual bubbly manner.

After she had left, Nozomu began to tidy up the classroom; it did not take long, and soon he was done and out the door. As he locked up the classroom for the night, however, he paused and lifted up part of his kimono, revealing his cutie mark. He stared at it for several seconds, before sighing and admitting “Well, I suppose it’s better than nothing”; then, he headed back to his home.

Chapter 3: Even In Celebration, Order is a Must

Nozomu Itoshiki trotted along quietly in the light of the setting sun, small motes of dust gently swirling up as his hooves hit the ground. He was on his way to teach his weekly evening class, yet as he thought of this he sighed morosely; true, he was the one to suggest the idea of them to Miss Cheerilee, and he was the one who had intended to teach these weekly classes in the first place, but that didn’t change the fact that these weekly classes seemed to bring him more frustration and despair than he usually felt. Perhaps it was something to do with the way in which he was delivering his teaching materials to the class?

He paused and thought about this for a moment, before shaking his head dismissively and carrying on. Soon he reached the entrance to the classroom; late as usual, he knew that inside awaited nine mares who were expecting him to teach them a variety of interesting new material – yet whether he really wanted to was another matter entirely. Lifting up the lower half of his kimono, he glanced towards his cutie mark momentarily before letting the kimono fall back; he gave a shrug, sighed softly, and prepared himself for the lesson ahead before throwing open the classroom door.

“SURPRISE!”

Nozomu leapt back in shock, taken aback by Pinkie Pie ecstatically leaping out into the doorway from who-knows-where. His jaw hanging open, he glanced into the room and saw streamers, banners, confetti and balloons all scattered about; the tables had all been pushed together on one side of the room, a cloth strewn over them and covered in an assortment of party snacks. In the middle of the room stood the remainder of his students, all wearing eager grins and donning party hats.

“Hi, Pink Supervisor!”, Pinkie Pie began rambling, “I remember when I first saw you and you were hanging from a tree and I was all like ‘NO! You can’t do this!’ and then I almost killed you but then I didn’t and then I paid you to let me call you ‘Pink Supervisor’ and then you declined and ran off but then I realised that I hadn’t seen you before so I started planning a ‘Welcome to Ponyville’ party for you! But before I got a chance to throw you a welcome party you got your cutie mark which is when I realised that you would never have had a cute-ceañera so I thought that I could throw you one of those too which is when I thought it’d be a good idea to combine both into one so that that way we could welcome you to Ponyville and have your cute-ceañera at the same time, so the fun would be doubled! But ‘cause I don’t know where you live I wasn’t able to throw it at your house so I thought the next best place would be here ‘cause I know you’d show up here since you show up here every week to teach your lessons so this would be the best place to throw your party and-”

Pinkie Pie stopped her excited tirade when she noticed tears beginning to well up in Nozomu’s eyes. “H-hey, are you okay?” she asked worriedly.

After a short pause, Nozomu responded “Y-you did all of this…for me?”

“Of course, silly! Not only are you new to Ponyville, but you just got your cutie mark recently too! It’s only right that we celebrate both of those wonderful things, so this party’s just for you!”, Pinkie giggled, pausing before adding “That is, if you’d like to postpone today’s lesson for the party…”

There was another momentary pause; then, Nozomu responded, “W-well…seeing as you went to so much trouble, I’d hate to see it all go to waste, so…”

Pinkie Pie began bouncing up and down excitedly as she squealed “Yay! Then let’s PARTY!”, before she grabbed Nozomu by the foreleg and quickly pulled him inside, slamming the door shut behind him.

It wasn’t long before the festivities were in full swing, and everypony in the classroom was having a good time – even the normally-despondent Nozomu Itoshiki. Despite it being his party, he was quite content to sit in the corner and quietly sip at his beverage, watching his students as they eagerly chatted away with one another all the while. Occasionally one of them would strike up a short conversation with him before returning to the party; for the most part, however, they just left him be, realising that he was just simply that kind of pony.

When somepony began talking to him, Nozomu often found that the most common topic of interest seemed to be where he came from and his reasons for coming to Ponyville – a question that Nozomu didn’t really mind answering, though admittedly that was partly because answering it now would save having to explain it all later.

Nozomu had just finished talking to Colgate when he noticed Fluttershy approaching, seemingly intent on asking the same question as all the others.

“Ah, Fluttershy,” he remarked, “let me guess; you’re wondering where I came from and why I came to Ponyville, am I right?”

“Um, well, sort of…that, and why you haven’t really, um…’despaired’ that much today,” she agreed.

“Well, I’ve been given a party celebrating my newly-acquired cutie mark and my recent arrival in Ponyville. There isn’t really much to despair about there,” he admitted, before pausing and glancing off thoughtfully, “Although now that I think about it…”

Sensing where this was going, Fluttershy interrupted “Um, you were going to tell me a bit more about yourself?”

Nozomu shook his head and turned his attention back to Fluttershy. “Ah, yes. That’s right. Well, pull up a seat and I’ll tell you what you want to know.”

Sitting down, Fluttershy asked “So, um…where did you come from, anyway?”

“Well, I originally came from Japony. I’m born and raised Japonese, along with my siblings, and was originally a high school teacher when I lived over there. After a while, I became interested in what I could both learn from and teach to ponies in other areas of the world; so, after learning some basic Equestrian, I decided to travel to Equestria and begin teaching evening classes over here. I thought Ponyville would be as good a place to start as any, so…here I am,” he explained, making a sweeping gesture with his hoof as he finished.

“Oh, wow. Well, that certainly is interesting. Tell me, what’s it like over in Japony?”

“That depends on the region. For example, where I’m from is an area not too different from Ponyville, with one or two cities nearby.”

“Ah, I see. Well thank you for your time, Mr. Itoshiki. I hope you enjoy the party.”

Nozomu smiled and raised his glass in appreciation. “No problem. Thanks for asking.”

As she turned to walk away, she paused for a moment and added, “Mr. Itoshiki?”

He looked back up from his drink in confusion. “Yes?”

Turning back to him, she sheepishly asked, “Well…when Pinkie Pie met you, she said that you were ‘trying to make yourself taller’…although I know what she meant by that now…and I was just wondering...why?”

“You mean, why was I trying to hang myself that day?”

There was a moment of awkward silence from Fluttershy. “Um…yes.”

Sighing, Nozomu shook his head and replied, “Well…it was mainly because-”

Before he could finish, however, he was interrupted by a loud clatter on the other side of the room.

“Berry Punch! What do you think you’re doing?” Twilight yelled.

Nozomu and Fluttershy turned their heads to see Berry Punch with her head shoved in the punch bowl, greedily slurping away at the liquids within, while Twilight stood nearby with an expression of both rage and horror plastered on her face. Berry lifted her head out and hiccupped, giving Twilight a drunken grin as she did so. “C’mon, Twilight, take it eeeaaasy…” she drunkenly chuckled.

“No, no, no! What you’re doing is disorderly and unhygienic; you’ll contaminate the punch for everypony! I mean, you should at least be using a cup!” Twilight argued.

“Uh, Twi? I don’t think it’d make much difference at this point anyway,” Lyra pointed out.

“What I’d like to know is how Berry got drunk in the first place. Nopony even brought any alcohol to the party…” Colgate murmured in the background.

“So? Proper etiquette should still be maintained at all times, even at a party like this!” Twilight objected. Suddenly, she levitated a book out from her nearby saddlebags titled ‘The Dos and Don’ts of Good Party Etiquette’ and began to read aloud, “Chapter 14, Section 9, Subsection H; ‘when one is consuming punch or a similar beverage garnered from a bowl containing said liquid, one must always use a cup or similar beverage container in order to prevent the possibility of backwash in the liquid and so in turn decreasing the risk of contamination within the beverage’”. She levitated the book up to Berry Punch’s face and shook it back and forth vehemently, “See? Proper party etiquette indicates that you should be drinking from a cup, not shoving your whole face in there!”

Suddenly, she froze and levitated the book back in front of her face, wildly flicking through the pages as she skimmed them over. “Actually, now that I think about it, there are a pretty big number of Don’ts at this party, anyway…”

After a few moments of silence, Twilight slammed the book shut and began running around the room, levitating objects back and forth as she re-organised the multitude of supposed “don’ts” within the room.

“Oh, great…she’s having one of those ‘by-the-book’ moments again!” Colgate lamented.

Nozomu and Fluttershy had now joined the others in watching Twilight’s frantic flurry of organisation as she continued to whirl around the room.

“Wait…do you mean to say that she’s always like this?” Nozomu asked.

“That’s right. Twilight Sparkle is the most methodical, organised and precise pony I know, and always manages to complete every task she undertakes to an excellent degree of detail,” Rarity confirmed, shortly before adding, “…although there are a few times where she goes a bit over-the-top in doing things ‘by-the-book’, as you can see now…”

Nozomu’s face began to contort into a scowl, as he glanced towards Twilight with distant eyes. “Is that so? It seems that even here in Ponyville, one cannot escape the presence of those with an overly-analytical nature. You see, many will analyse a situation or an object in order to either determine the best possible outcome to the situation or to learn more about the object in question; but if one proceeds to over-analyse said object or situation, then they may discover something about the thing they’re analysing that deep down they never truly wanted to learn! And while being precise is by no means a bad thing, over-precision may eventually lead to such a degree of accuracy that one can see no other course of action save for the one that they have pinpointed with their own precision!”

Growling in desperation, Nozomu threw his head back and screamed, “I’M IN DESPAIR! This world full of overly-precise and excessively-analytical ponies has left me in despair!”

After a momentary pause, Bon Bon pointed out “But…the reason why you’re in despair so much is because you’re always over-analysing everything in a negative light. So…isn’t that kind of hypocritical?”

There were a few murmurs of general agreement from the other students (sans Twilight), causing Nozomu to freeze awkwardly for a few moments before suddenly remarking “W-well…in any case, we need to find a way to calm Twilight down before-“

“There! All done!” Twilight chirped happily.

The others turned to face her and admired her handiwork. Surprisingly enough, spontaneously re-organising the majority of the decorations had actually caused the room to garner a more festive appearance.

“Um…nice work?” Nozomu commented uneasily.

“Thanks! Now the party is entirely accurate and by-the-book!” Twilight remarked proudly, levitating the book back towards her saddlebags.

“Well, I guess that this particular party does look more orderly…” Rarity suggested offhandedly.

The book froze in mid-air, as Twilight turned to Rarity with a perplexed look on her face. “Wait…what do you mean by ‘this particular party’”?

Rarity quickly shot Twilight a nervous grin and stammered, “Oh, um…n-nothing, darling! I was simply commenting on how…n-nicely…you’ve spruced up our little get-together…”

After a few moments silence, Twilight turned back to her book with a thoughtful look and replied “You know, you’re right, Rarity…I’ve helped to ‘spruce up’ this party, but there are probably a couple of other parties out there that are still disorganised!”; she turned towards the door with a look of determination etched onto her face, proclaiming “And as the unofficial party organiser of Ponyville, it’s my job to make sure that those parties are orderly and by-the-book!” as she began to gallop towards the door, book hovering in tow behind her.

“Hey! I thought I was the official party organiser of Ponyville!” Pinkie objected.

Twilight paused for a moment in the doorway and added, “That’s why I said I was the unofficial party organiser of Ponyville,” before galloping out through the doorway.

Everypony stood there awkwardly with confused looks on their faces, a moment of silence passing before Fluttershy asked “Um…shouldn’t we go after her?”

“Yeah, that’d probably be a good idea,” Colgate remarked, “I mean, we don’t want to risk this turning into something on the scale of the Smartypants Incident...”

“Ugh, don’t remind me about that. I’ve still got bruises from where Lyra thumped me”, Bon Bon added, grimacing.

“Hey, I said I was sorry! We were both under a mind-control spell, remember? And anyway, you bit me!” Lyra retorted.

Nozomu cocked his head to one side, staring at the others with a bemused look on his face. “Uh…what are we talking about now?”

Pinkie glanced over at Nozomu and dismissively commented, “Oh, just some incident where Twilight went crazy and almost caused the complete destruction of Ponyville.”

“And I ended up wrestling with the mayor!” Ditzy joyfully supplemented.

“So, it looks like we’ll have to cut your party a little short…sorry, Pink Supervisor,” Pinkie apologised dejectedly.

“Um…well, if it’s to prevent the complete destruction of Ponyville, then…I suppose it can’t be helped?” he replied confusedly.

“Don’t worry! We’ll have another party to make up for it some other time!” Pinkie reassured him, before turning to the others and adding “Alright, everypony! Let’s split up and find Twilight!”

The mares emptied from the classroom quickly, and it wasn’t long before Nozomu was left standing there by himself. Initially he simply stood glancing around the room filled wall-to-wall with party decorations, but eventually he sighed and began to clear up the organised chaos left behind by his students. As he proceeded around the room and removed the various decorations, he shook his head and mumbled a sordid truth he’d just realised moments ago.

“All the ponies in this town are crazy…”

Chapter 4: The Reclusive Fashionista

The sun shone brightly in the azure sky, the swings in the schoolyard rocking gently back and forth to the rhythm of the cool spring breeze. Inside the school classroom itself, Nozomu Itoshiki sat opposite Cheerilee, glaring down at the ground as he sighed despondently.

“So…why did you want to see me, Mr. Itoshiki?” Cheerilee asked.

“W-well…I was hoping you could counsel me, to be honest…” he admitted sheepishly.

“Um…well, I’m not really a counsellor…” she began, before noticing the look of worry on Nozomu’s face at this comment and continuing “b-but I’ll still listen to what you have to say!”

Nozomu nodded and glumly began, “I…am a pony with no reason to live.”

Cheerilee tilted her head to one side in confusion, “Why do you say that?”

“Because both my mind and heart are impure,” he replied solemnly, “my twisted mind ruins everything.” He paused for a moment, before continuing “For example, this morning I was walking through the Ponyville market, and overheard a mare talking about the upcoming ‘Applebuck Season’.”

“You mean the one over at Sweet Apple Acres? Well, what’s so wrong about that?” Cheerilee inquired.

“Because a few moments earlier, I had heard a pony using the word ‘buck’ as an expletive, and upon hearing ‘Applebuck Season’ shortly after, the two phrases combined in my head to create a horrifying phrase!” he exclaimed, burying his head in his forehooves in frustration.

“Ah, because in your mind, Applebuck Season became…” she paused; “Yes, I can see how that would be depressing,” she concluded morosely.

Nozomu threw his head back and cried, “I’M IN DESPAIR! This society that corrupts innocent words by using them as placeholders for language that is much more vulgar has left me in despair!” before dropping his face back into his hooves.

After a short pause, he trotted over to the window and glared out at the schoolyard. “Now the previously innocuous phrase ‘Applebuck Season’ has been corrupted in my mind forevermore, which could potentially lead to many uncomfortable situations later on in my life; thus, the only possible solution to this dilemma would be…to end my own life,” he concluded thusly.

“Um…y-you don’t need to go that far…” Cheerilee stammered nervously, before quickly changing the subject and adding “A-anyway, let’s talk about something else…apparently, one of the students in your class has become a recluse after a recent incident; what you would call a ‘hikikomori’ in your language.”

Nozomu turned towards Cheerilee, a confused look on his face. “A hikikomori? You mean a shut-in?” he asked.

“That’s right. Several of her friends have attempted to get her to leave her room, but none of their attempts so far have succeeded. Considering that she’s one of the students in your evening classes, I thought that you could head over there and check up on her, to make sure that she’s okay.”

Turning back to the window, Nozomu muttered “I already have my own share of problems right now. I don’t have enough time to deal with a student’s issues at the moment…”

As he glanced back at Cheerilee, he saw her giving him a stare that would have rivalled – possibly even outclassed – Fluttershy’s own, and he quickly recoiled, stammering “U-um…w-well, I suppose that it couldn’t hurt to check up on her, right?” before hastily galloping out of the classroom.

Once he was out of the room, Cheerilee smiled sweetly and commented “I’m glad we could work things out.”

It wasn’t long before Nozomu Itoshiki was standing before Carousel Boutique, admiring the overall elegance of the building’s design.

Sighing, Nozomu began to mutter “Miss Cheerilee’s gaze is unsettling…” before being interrupted by a nearby voice. Turning to its source, he saw an excited pink mass eagerly bounding towards him, an excited grin glued to her face.

“Hey, Pink Supervisor! What’s up? Besides the sky, I mean?” Pinkie asked with her usual exuberance.

“Pinkie Pie? What are you doing here?” Nozomu responded quizzically.

“Oh, I just thought that I’d bring Rarity some sweet snacks to try and coax her out of her room!” Pinkie replied, pulling a cupcake out of hammerspace for a moment to show Nozomu before returning it to said void. After a short pause, she added “So, why are you here?”

“Actually, I’m here visiting her on orders from Miss Cheerilee,” Nozomu admitted.

“Cool! Mind if I tag along?” Pinkie asked.

“But…weren’t you going to see her anyway?”

“Yeah, but it’ll be more fun if we see her together!” Pinkie added, grinning.

After a moment of hesitation, Nozomu shrugged and replied “I suppose so…”, before they both entered the boutique together.

As they neared Rarity’s room, Nozomu overheard a duo of voices arguing loudly.

“Come on, Sis! Please come out! You can’t stay in there forever!” a younger voiced whined.

“I can, and I will! I’m never leaving this room again! I can never show my face in Ponyville – nay, Equestria – ever again!” the other voice shrieked.

“Come on, Rarity. Just because one little outfit went wrong…” the younger voice pleaded.

“‘One little outfit’?! That ‘one little outfit’, as you so call it, was supposed to be a gift for Sapphire Shores, a magnificent ensemble that would have enhanced her concert and immortalised my name in the history of Equestrian fashion forevermore! But when she wore that outfit onstage…the crowd booed her! They booed her because of my outfit! How could I show my face in Equestria after that?” Rarity retorted.

“But Rarity-” the younger voice began.

“Leave me alone! I want to be left alone!” Rarity wailed.

As they turned the corner, Nozomu spotted a young filly walking away from Rarity’s room; her head hung low in sorrow. As they approached, she lifted her head up slowly, and Nozomu could see tears forming in her eyes.

“No luck, Sweetie Belle?” Pinkie asked worriedly.

“No luck. I’m starting to wonder if she’ll ever come out of her room again…” Sweetie replied, looking back towards Rarity’s door and sniffling.

“Don’t worry, Sweetie Belle…I’m sure she’ll be back to her old self soon! Just you wait and see!” Pinkie reassured her, pulling the cupcake back out of hammerspace and giving it to Sweetie Belle. The young filly smiled in return, taking the cupcake and balancing it on her back.

“Thanks, Pinkie,” she replied, before turning to Nozomu with a confused look on her face. “Hey, who’s this?”

“Oh, this is Nozomu Itoshiki, or as I like to call him, Pink Supervisor!” Pinkie explained cheerfully.

“Pink Supervisor? Why’d you call him that?”

“Because he was hanging from Pink Gabriel, the cherry blossom tree!”

“Hanging…?”

“From a noose. He was trying to make himself taller.” Pinkie stated bluntly.

“For the last time, I was trying to commit suicide, not make myself taller!” Nozomu objected angrily.

“Ah, Pink Supervisor! You’re such a kidder!” Pinkie giggled, playfully punching him in the foreleg and earning herself a scowl from Nozomu in the process. Turning back to Sweetie Belle, she finished “Anyway, he teaches an evening class that Rarity and I attend, so we though that maybe he could convince your sister to leave her room.”

“Okay…” Sweetie Belle responded, not sure what to make of all this; “Well, I’ll be downstairs if you guys need me, so…see you guys later!” she added, before quickly trotting out of sight.

As he watched her leave, Nozomu commented, “I take it that she’s Rarity’s younger sister, then?”

“Yep! That’s Sweetie Belle; along with her friends Applebloom and Scootaloo, she’s part of the Cutie Mark Crusaders! I’ll have to introduce you to them sometime!” Pinkie replied cheerfully, before turning back to Rarity’s room with a thoughtful – yet determined – expression on her face. “Now, how are we going to get Rarity to leave her room?”

The pink party pony stood there, her hoof raised up to her chin, pondering the possible resolution to the perplexing, problematic predicament she currently faced, all the while gazing intently at the door with a level of intensity rarely seen in her eyes. The effect was rather spoilt when Nozomu simply trotted up to the door and knocked on it with his hoof. “Rarity? It’s me, Nozomu Itoshiki. Would I be able to have a few words with you?”

“Mr. Itoshiki?” Rarity answered curiously. After a moment of silence, she continued, “I apologise, Mr. Itoshiki, but I am not accepting visitors at the moment and would rather be left alone. Good day.”

Nozomu shrugged and trotted back over to Pinkie. “Well, that didn’t work. Let’s go.”

“Are you kidding? We’ve just got to try harder!” Pinkie objected; grabbing Nozomu and dragging him back over to the door of Rarity’s room.

“Rarity, Pink Supervisor came all this way to see you! Isn’t it a little rude to ignore him like that?” Pinkie yelled, banging on the door with her hoof.

“Pinkie? You’re there too?” Rarity responded.

“That’s right! We’re your friends, Rarity! You can at least talk to us!” Pinkie pleaded.

“Please, Pinkie…I would rather be left on my own right now…” Rarity murmured sorrowfully.

Sighing, Pinkie turned to Nozomu and asked “Now what do we do?”

“I would suggest that you offer her the cupcake you brought for her, but if I recall correctly you gave that to her sister,” Nozomu replied.

“Oh, that? Nonononono, that wasn’t the cupcake I brought for Rarity, it was a spare,” she pulled another cupcake out of hammerspace; “this is the cupcake I brought for Rarity!” she said with a grin.

After staring at the confectionary with a puzzled look for a few seconds, Nozomu shook his head and suggested “Then why don’t you offer it to her? It might coax her out of her room, like you said.”

“Oh, yeah! Good thinking!” she squealed excitedly before calling out, “Hey, Rarity! I brought you a cupcake! Want to try it? It’s good!” However, her offer was met with dull silence.

She rubbed her chin with her hoof thoughtfully for a moment, before quickly turning to Nozomu with a manic expression and shoving the cupcake into his hooves. “I’ve got an idea! You climb on to the roof and lower yourself down to her window with some rope! Then you can climb in and give her the cupcake!”

Nozomu simply stared at her, mouth agape, before flatly responding with “What.”

“Come on! It’s the only way we’ll be able to deliver that cupcake to her! Meanwhile, Sweetie Belle and I will try to convince her to leave her room!” she begged.

“But we’ve just been trying that for the last few minutes, and it didn’t work at all!” he protested.

“Trust me on this! I know what I’m doing!” she called out as she galloped downstairs.

Nozomu looked down at the cupcake in his hoof and shook his head, stating “Well, I suppose a plan’s a plan…”

It wasn’t long before Nozomu was on the roof, carefully lowering himself down towards the window, the rope wrapped around his waist to prevent him from slipping off.

“Why do I have to do this…?” he grumbled in annoyance, shaking his head.

Suddenly, his hoof broke through the guttering as he stepped onto it, causing him to tumble backwards from the roof down the side of the building. Worse still, his body slipped right through the loosely-wrapped rope, causing it to tighten around his neck as he plummeted.

Inside her dimly-lit room, Rarity lifted her head up from her bed and looked over at the closed curtains nervously, her mane bedraggled and unkempt from a combination of both stress and lack of maintenance. “What was that noise just now?”

She apprehensively began to make her way over to the window, before being interrupted by a knock from the door. She paused for a moment, before trotting back towards the door.

“Rarity, it’s me, Pinkie!” Pinkie began.

“And me too!” Sweetie chimed in.

“Please come out and talk to us! We’re really worried about you, and we just want to make sure you’re okay!” Pinkie pleaded.

“Come on, sis! What you’re doing is really selfish!” Sweetie added.

After an awkward silence, Rarity confusedly responded “…I’m being…selfish?”

“That’s right! Everypony’s worried sick about you because you stay locked in your room all the time and keep turning everyone away, even though all we want to do is talk to you and help you out!” Sweetie yelled.

“Yeah! I mean, I know that what happened with Sapphire Shores’ outfit must have been rough on you, but you’re never going to be able to deal with it unless you come out and have a real conversation with us!” Pinkie added.

“Please, Rarity…just come out and talk to us…” Sweetie begged.

Another awkward silence followed, before Rarity sighed and admitted, “Alright…I suppose I have been rather selfish by making you all worry. I’ll come out and talk to you for a few minutes. But first let me open these windows; it is getting rather musty in here.”

As she trotted over to the window she heard her sister and friend cheer outside, along with the sound of a high-hoof. Smiling, she tilted her horn towards the windows, enveloping the curtains in a faint glow before flinging them open with her magic.

Upon which she was greeted with the sight of Nozomu Itoshiki’s still corpse, strung up by the neck with a noose and dangling gently in the breeze. Her mouth fell agape in horror, but before she had a chance to react the corpse’s head lifted up and screamed at her “WHAT IF I HAD DIED?!”

Rarity then smashed through the bedroom door and galloped out of her room, shrieking in terror all the while. As she galloped away, a look of worry emerged on the faces of both Pinkie Pie and Sweetie Belle.

“Well, at least she’s out of her room…” Pinkie weakly commented, while Sweetie Belle dropped down onto her haunches.

“Oh, horseapples…” she murmured in frustration.

The sun descended over the horizon as the day neared it's end, basking the schoolhouse in a warm and calming glow. However, the peaceful atmosphere was soon shattered by the frantic clopping of hooves against dirt, as a trio of ponies galloped hurriedly along the gravel path leading up to the schoolhouse.

“Are you sure she'll be here, Pinkie?” Nozomu asked frustratedly.

“Yeah! I mean, we've been looking all over Ponyville for three hours now, and we still haven't found her!” Sweetie added.

“I'm not sure! But we've checked all of the other places she regularly visits, and this is the last spot I could think of!” she explained.

The soon stopped outside the schoolhouse; as they trotted up to the front door, Nozomu began to reach into his kimono.

“Well, in any case, even if she is here – which I doubt she will be, considering that the place should have been locked up tight all day – I'm still not sure if we'll be able to say anything that'll convince her to head back to Carousel Boutique,” he remarked.

“Sure we will!” Pinkie replied, “Once she sees that you're safe and sound and alive and well, she'll realise that there's nothing to get worried about and she'll come back home with us!”

Pulling the door key out of his kimono, Nozomu began to comment “I'm not so sure if-” before being interrupted by the door of the schoolhouse swinging open suddenly. Cheerilee stood in the doorway, giving a surprised look at Nozomu before quickly switching it to one of annoyance and condemnation.

“Mr. Itoshiki...how lovely to see you. I've just been having a little chat with Rarity, and she seems to have been mentioning something about...a suicide attempt outside her window?” she said in an icy tone.

Nozomu quickly shot a worried look towards Pinkie and Sweetie, before turning back to Cheerilee. “I-I can explain! Pinkie Pie suggested the cupcake, and climbing the roof, and I slipped, and-” he faltered nervously, before Cheerilee interrupted him.

“Regardless of what happened, after a brief conversation with Rarity, I have managed to reassure her that what happened was simply a misunderstanding, and that you were not trying to commit suicide because she refused to come out of her room as you led her to believe,” she explained, pausing to observe the look of guilt on Nozomu's face before adding “However, thanks to your little display she is still somewhat emotionally shaken, and – barring the occasional visit to the schoolhouse for your weekly lessons – she will therefore need to remain in her home at Carousel Boutique in order to recuperate from this event.”

“Come now, Cheerilee. I don't think we need to go that far,” Rarity commented.

As Cheerilee stepped out of the doorway to let her through, Rarity trotted onto the front porch of the schoolhouse, smiling calmly despite her frazzled look, “Indeed, while I was a little shaken from this at first, once I remembered Mr. Itoshiki's previous attempts at such an activity-

“Previous attempts?” Cheerilee murmured questioningly.

“-I soon realised that this was little more than an attention-grabbing act from Mr. Itoshiki, as it always is, and realised there was little to worry about.” she added, looking towards Nozomu as he glanced away sheepishly.

“In any case, it is getting rather late, and there are some things that I must attend to. Come, Sweetie Belle. We're going home.” Rarity concluded, trotting down the gravel path with her younger sister following closely behind. After a few moments of silence, Rarity called back “Mr. Itoshiki!”

Nozomu's ears pricked up at the sound of his name and he turned towards her direction. “Um...yes?”

Rarity glanced back to face him with a sweet smile on her face, giving a moment's pause before angrily hissing “I've got my eye on you...”; then, she continued on her way without another word.

There was an awkward silence between the three remaining ponies that lasted for a few minutes, before Cheerliee coughed nervously and remarked “Well, I suppose I'd better be getting home too; I have some papers to grade, so...”

“Yeah, I promised the Cakes I'd help them prepare some muffins for tomorrow, so I'd probably better get going...” Pinkie added.

As the two of them trotted off, Nozomu simply sat on his haunches dumbfounded, attempting to mentally process what had just transpired. Eventually, he simply sighed and shook his head, locking up the schoolhouse before proceeding to make his way home.