~Let's Pretend~
Sometimes I'm a magical compass, leading four intrepid if somewhat whimsical explorers deep into the sweltering black liquorice jungles of the Amarezipan river in search of the legendary Lost City of El Chimichanga and the fountain of endless chocolate within. We, four brave little fillies and their trusty compass, would march through the dark chocolate swamps, stumble upon the occasional rocky roads while avoiding the treacherous rainbow gumdrops in our way. Butterscotch flowers and low hanging candy apples sought to distract us from our quest, but credit where it's due, my band of four courageous fillies were above such petty temptations.
"It's an entire caramel waterfall! Last one in gets die-a-bait-tee-tea-ties!" Our most tempered and restrained leader and scout, one young Marble Pie, shouted excitedly while peering into her trusty red binoculars at a magnificent golden curtain of caramel cascading over a mountain of rock candy. The glorious spectacle gleamed in the heat of the tropical buttercup sun, a formidably sweet temptress promising sugar, dreams and everything nice.
The slightly-more-leader-ish-leader and resident navigator, the impetuous Pinkie Pie, showed slightly less restraint and a lot more initiative in simply swan-diving for the caramel waterfall, somehow magically traversing the entire distance between the binoculars and the waterfall in one single leap.
"Wait, you two!" The moderately-lesser-but-still-important-leader and resident voice of reason, Limey Pie, bit down on Marble and Pinkie's tails, causing them both to fall flat on their bellies mid-jump. "It might be a trap!" She cried, spitting out their tails.
"Limey, not everything's a trap." Marble pointed out, impatiently, struggling to peel herself and her binoculars off Pinkie's face. They finally came off with a very audible wet pop.
"Especially not when it's an entire caramel waterfall, duh." Pinkie added helpfully, with what passes for wisdom in this party, at least by loud majority. "Nothing that good can be a trap!"
Meanwhile, on a humble rock farm in somewhere, someplace, Fillydelphia, our resident Maud Pie, Maud Pie, spoke up. "Because it's a rainwater barrel." She pointed out the rainwater barrel sitting on a corner of the barn, draining the last of last night's fresh spring rain.
And there she goes again. I sighed. There was simply no way to get her to the deep dark jungles of the Amarezipan river. As far as the rest of us were concerned, Maud was stuck on another rock entirely.
Back in the thick dark jungles of the Amarezipan river, Limey Pie was busy voicing her frustration. "But it's always a trap when I go touch it!" She complained to her sisters and fellow adventurers. "Why is it never a trap when you or Pinkie touch the goodies?" She demanded justice and equal-opportunity traps.
Maybe because you're the youngest, Limey.
"Because I have my Pinkie sense, duh." Pinkie giggled.
"Your twitching is because you had more sugar than tea this morning." Maud Pie's contribution was thankfully lost in the background cacophony of jungle noises.
I honestly doubt it was just sugar.
"But that eclair bush I sniffed..." Limey Pie said.
"A trap." Marble and Pinkie said with absolute certainty. "It completely creamed you."
"And the fondant flowers." Limey Pie pouted.
Pretty much all the flowers, Limey. They were all out to get you.
"Yepper-rooney!" Pinkie nodded. "I never liked bitter lemon fondant." She added in a low whisper. "I don't think they liked you either."
"And Maud. Why was she a deadly trap?" Limey's pouting intensified, pointing an accusing hoof at Maud.
Well, she's just Maud.
"She's too sweet for anypony." Marble declared, "That's why they call it die-ate-beauties-teas-tees-ties." She said, struggling to find the brakes on the word.
"Yeah, you die-a-bait-quickies." Pinkie nodded in agreement, curling a hoof around Maud's neck and pulling her into a quick nuzzle. "See?"
"I see no difference." Limey sulked. "Shouldn't you die-a-bit-easies from touching her?" She demanded.
"This is me doin-a-bouncies, silly." Pinkie said with a giggle, doing a little four-hoofed hop for emphasis. "See? I've never been die-bleat-sees-er!"
Whatever that means.
"Maybe not even being dead can stop the mighty Pinkie and the party she led." Marble narrated, poetically. "Because sugar is her power, chocolate-fraught cheer makes her...." She frowned, tapping a hoof on her chin thoughtfully. "Hey, magical compass, what rhymes with 'chocolate' and 'fraught'?" She asked me.
Before I could answer Maud helpfully pointed out the shortcoming in her question, "But that's a rock. Rocks don't rhyme." She said, pointing a hoof at me.
I beg to differ. I can totally rhyme. Duck, swag and rock'n'roll. See?
"That's why it's called 'Let's Pretend'." Pinkie trilled, "When we're pretending, anything can happen! I can sing. Marble can fly. Rocks can rhyme!"
I just wish Marble would come back down to Equestria from time to time.
"I...see?" Maud tilted her head to one side.
"Of course you do! In fact, Maud, give us a rock rhyme!" Marble said, "C'mon, gimme a hoof here." She said, pleadingly.
"Oh, um..." Maud looked around uncertainly, fidgeting a little under pressure. "Ah, 'rock'." She finally murmured.
"Chocolate-fraught cheer makes her rock!" Marble declared. "That works!"
"Oh." Maud whispered, "That's...good." She allowed herself a teeny smile.
"Good? That. Was. The. Best. Poem. EVER!" Pinkie pulled Marble and Maud close together into a tight huggle-snuggle. "And it totally wasn't because it was a poem about me."
It totally was.
"Pinkie's dead. Everything's a trap. We'll never get to the Lost City of El Chimichanga !" Limey wailed in despair, partly out of frustration, partly out of being left out of the hug. "And I'm sure we saw that same puddle-...I mean, tempting but treacherous dark chocolate swamp of doom, earlier." Uncertainty began to grow amongst the courageous band of adventurers, starting upon the lips of little Limey Pie. "Are you sure we're going the right way?" The little filly asked, twiddling her little forehooves anxiously.
"Sure, I'm sure! I'm the leader!" Pinkie declared, "Being a leader means being doubly triply sure-y sure!"
"And the young Limey Pie doesn't believe her leader and the magical compass of magic." Marble Pie narrated ominously, "Will little fillies who don't believe in the magical compass of magic get a taste of the endless fountain of chocolate at the end?"
"But I'm a leader too!" Limey Pie squeaked in protest.
And I'm not holding it against you, absolutely not.
"Limey, we're all leaders. But some leaders are more leader-er than others." Marble said, soothingly. "And the leader-est leader decides where the magical compass points."
"It's a rock." The astute if blunt Maud Pie pointed a hoof at me. I gave her a hard look in reply.
"But this is 'Let's Pretend', anything can be anything we want it! And this..." Pinkie said, patiently, as she waved me under Maud's nose. "Is our magical compass that will lead us to the lost city of El Chimichanga!" She waved a hoof theatrically into the distance, somewhere beyond the sweltering gummy vines and pocky trees, deep within the dark shrouds beneath the cotton candy canopies.
"It's leading us to the outhouse." Maud pointed at the outhouse behind Pinkie, its rusted tin rooftop still dripping rainwater from last night.
"This compass is rocky." Limey muttered, shooting me a dark look.
Oh pebbles. Yeah, blame me for getting us lost. Blame me for that young princess turning into Nightmare Moon. Blame me for income tax and double parking. It's all my fault.
Marble pushed aside the screen of cherry pop bushes to reveal the ancient if magnificent ruins of an abandoned fudge quarry, its crusted sugary surface cracked in the hot midday sun. "Maybe because we must first dig through the Fudge Factor Quarry and the old ruins of Marelantis beneath it to find the seven keys to the lost city's candy bar gates." Marble whispered, softly.
"And I need to pee-pee!" Pinkie giggled, passing me to Marble before hopping inside and closing the door behind her. "Oooh, look, I found ducky!" A cheerful if muffled cry came from within.
"Or that." Marble conceded with a shrug.
"Now we'll never get anywhere!" Limey whined at her sisters, impatience growing to little-sister-tantrum levels. "You know how long Pinkie takes!"
There was a muffled flushing noise. "Oooh, Ducky found Marelantis!" Pinky's voice sailed out from within the dark ruins. "Go Ducky!"
"See!" Limey pointed a hoof at the door.
No, I don't want to see. Seriously, Limey.
Marble, sensing her sister's impatience, quickly scouted for their next destination. "It's alright, Limey, for, uh..." Marble looked around with her binoculars before quickly spotting her prize. "We're here! The ruins of Marelantis marks the dark entrance to the Lost City of Chimichanga!" She waved at the great candy bar gates towering high above them. "Beyond these gates a deep, unknown darkness blacker than liquorice, darker than chocolate, awaits us all." She whispered, hauntingly. Beyond them a gaping darkness loomed, as if ready to swallow them whole.
"You mean we found it?!" Pinkie inexplicably popped out from behind Limey Pie to borrow Marble's binoculars and peer through them. "It's still very far!"
"You're looking through it the wrong way around." Maud helpfully turned the binoculars the right way around.
"It's very empty!" Pinkie added.
"Now you're staring at my flank." Maud pointed out.
Heh, blank flank.
"Come, sisters. We are just a hoofstep away from the endless fountain of chocolate!" Marble declared, pointing a hoof into the dark depths beyond the gates.
And we're completely ignoring the deep unforgiving darkness between us and it.
"It's dark inside." Limey Pie said, picking up a pebble and tossing it inside. It returned a soft, almost ominous distant echo. Suddenly a loud groan filled the air before a loud bang shook the gates like an earthquake.
The little fillies all fell back into a huddle, clutching each other for safety. I don't blame them. If I had a bladder I'd have been emptying them right about then.
"It's the barn." Maud pointed a hoof at the old, rickety patchwork barn, creaking gently in the breeze. The aged wood groaned loudly in the buffeting wind. Dust rained down from the trapdoor to the second floor, the little chain beneath it swinging about in the aftershock of the trapdoor slamming shut in the wind. "And it is dark. And scary."
"C'mon, sillies, what is there to be afraid of out here?" Pinkie giggled, patting her sisters reassuringly.
"Us." Marble Pie shrugged, smiling, though her smile betrayed just a hint of anxiety.
"Everything." Maud said, simply.
"C'mon, you two, it's 'Let's Pretend'." Pinkie said with an encouraging smile. "That means you can pretend you're all the bravest, most courageous adventurer fillies in Equestria! Neigh, the whole world!"
"Or I can stay here?" Maud suggested, hopefully.
Was she afraid? Huh, with her impassivity and flat voice and face, I would never have had her pinned down for the easily-frightened type. That came as a bit of a surprise to me.
"Of course not!" Pinkie curled an encouraging hoof around Maud's neck. "Here, I'm giving you the magical compass. It'll lead you out of there, promise." She said, passing me over to Maud.
What? I have to stick with Maud now? Really, Pinkie? I sighed.
"But it's a rock." Maud persisted in calling me names. And they call me hard-headed.
"Let's pretend he is now your bestest best friend." Pinkie grinned, patting me gently.
I need to be best friends with her? Seriously? That's like, like, trying to befriend a rock! Oh, wait...
"When you call him, he'll be your knight in shining armour and come protect you, no matter what, as long as you can pretend." Pinkie said.
Er, really, Pinkie? I'm suddenly shining armour material? As long as she can pretend? Well, good luck with that.
"Pretend." Maud murmured, uncertainly, staring at me. I stared back. I had always believed I'd never lose at a staring contest. But that little filly's stare managed to put doubt in my very heart. "What do I need to pretend?" She finally asked, seemingly willing to give it a try.
"Pretend you're a strong, brave mare who can do anything." Pinkie said, simply. "Whether it's talking, or making friends, anything!"
I eyed Maud warily. You're stretching this game a little, aren't you, Pinkie?
"But..." Maud balked, softly. I saw the doubt in her eyes. It seemed to say everything. 'It can't be that easy; suddenly talking and making friends.'
"Shush! Trust me." Pinkie giggled, "It's called make-believe for a reason! Cause you make yourself believe!" She pointed out.
"Make myself believe?" Maud repeated, uncertainly.
C'mon, is it really that difficult? I sighed, impatiently. Then I remembered who this was. I felt a pang of guilt at my thoughts. Alright, fine, maybe I've been a little harsh. Maybe all she needs is a chance.
"C'mon, we have yummy treasures to eat, I mean, uncover!" Marble cried excitedly, turning around to lead her party forwards into the waiting darkness. "Now, follow me!"
"Wait a sec, I'm the leader!" Pinkie protested.
"We all are." Limey sighed, trudging along after her sisters.
Marble cast a wary eye over the dark walls lining the winding passages that led deeper into the heart of the lost city. "The ancients must have made these dark passages to confuse us. They've carved themselves into the walls to forever watch the treasures they've hidden deep inside their tomb." Marble whispered, running a hoof along the murals of many tall gummy bears engraved into the walls. "Even now they must be watching, waiting for us to get lost in their maze."
"It's just hay bales." Maud whispered back, though in the half-light even the piles and piles of hay bales packed tight into the barn seemed to loom sinisterly all around them. The claustrophobically tight passages between them didn't help either. Neither did their unsteady footing on the slippery straw underhoof.
Limey trembled a little as she slowly paced deeper into the dark. A cold draft ruffled her mane, sending goosebumps up her nape. "Where are you all? I can't see you." Limey whispered as she squinted into the darkness, struggling to get used to the low light. A low creak came from behind her. She gasped, leaping backwards in fright. Her flank bumped into something. That something bumped back. "Wh-wha...?" She squeaked, rounding quickly, only to find a massive shadow gummy bear reach out of its wall mural, claws bearing down on her. "AAAAAAAAAAAAH!" She shrieked as she was caught under its gelatinous grasp. "I-it's got me!" She cried, little hooves struggling against the captor pinning her down against the ground. "Leave me! Save yourselves!" She cried, valiantly.
Oh, pebbles!
Maud and I looked back to find Limey trapped underneath a fallen hay bale. I heard a little squeak escape from Maud's lips, her little hooves rooted to the ground. I could almost feel the tension coil in her legs. She wanted to rush forwards to save her sister. But at the same time fear froze her solid.
"The wall murals! They're waking up!" Marble cried as more of the gummy bear murals around them reached out of their walls. "That first one must have woken them all up!"
"I'll hold them!" Pinkie cried, rushing forwards to buck one out of Maud's way with her rearhooves. "Maud, you need to find the legendary fountain of endless chocolate! Quickly!" She cried, holding another gummy bear back with her forehooves.
"But, I..." Maud looked about, confused, "What do I...?"
"Use the fountain to make a wish!" Marble cried, holding an entire army of gummy bears with her back alone. "It's the only way to lift the curse on this lost city! Wait!" She gasped, pointing at me. "Look! The magical compass! It's shining!" She shielded her eyes from my sudden radiance. "It must have been the legendary fountain all along!"
I am? That's news to me.
"It led us here so it could turn back to its true form!" Marble said.
Looks like I am. So sometimes I'm a legendary fountain of endless chocolate too.
"I'm confused." Maud backed away slowly. "I'm scared." She murmured, before feeling her flank bump against something, stopping her retreat. She gave a soft gasp as she noticed the small sack of white flour perched precariously atop the hay bale behind her, slowly tipping towards her.
"Maud!" Pinkie gasped, giving the gummy bear before her one last kick, sending it flying. She whirled around and galloped hard towards Maud as a giant white frosting flower burst out of the largest mural behind Maud, threatening to devour her whole. "Quick, you need to make a wish!" She cried, grabbing onto Maud with her forehooves and whirling around to toss her to safety, effectively switching places with her. "Make a wish, Maud!" Pinkie cried as she pulled out an extra-large party popper out of nowhere, aiming it up at the rabid white flower above her. "You can do it!" She shouted one last time before firing an explosive barrage of confetti, glitter and sparkles at the creature. The gigantic flower gave a loud death shriek as it exploded into cloud of dense white smoke that quickly consumed Pinkie Pie.
"Pinkie Pie!" Maud gasped, clutching me tightly. "What do I do?"
Hurry, Maud, make a wish! You can do it!
"Yes, I need to make a wish." Maud said to me. "I want to make a wish." She repeated, fervently.
Great! Err....what now?
A bright light shone suddenly out from the billowing white cloud. The burning light seemed to stun all the gummy bear murals frozen. "I heard you." A voice said from somewhere within the billowing white cloud. A single white hoof stepped out, followed by another, trailing majestic plumes of white smoke. "I am Surprise, alicorn princess of dreams and wishes." The voice said as the smoke receded to reveal the regal form of a pure white alicorn princess. Her lustrous tresses curled and rolled like golden butter, stopping short of her gleaming white wings. Her horn glowed bright, sending the darkness fleeing before her. "I was sealed by this nasty meanie-pants called Discord for one thousand and three and a half years in that thing you called a magical compass. It was sneakily my Element of Wishes all along, but Discord disguised it so nopony would ever find it and release me!"
Okay, I'm having an identity crisis here. I started out a compass. Then I became a fountain of endless chocolate. Now I'm the Element of Wishes and a magical alicorn princess container? This is going to hurt in the morning.
"Whoah! So you were an alicorn-genie-in-a-bottle all along!" Marble gasped, crawling out from beneath a frozen gummy bear. "That's, like, awesome!"
"Pinkie Pie?" Maud asked her flour-covered sister.
"I'm Surprise, silly! You need to listen to alicorn princesses! Oh, and give them lots of sweets of course, but we can do that later." The alicorn princess, Surprise, giggled imperiously.
"Why do you have a cone on your head?" Maud asked, pointing at the upturned party popper now stuck on Pinkie's forehead.
This is Pinkie. Why not?
"That's my horn, all the better to magic you with, duh." Surprise rolled her eyes majestically.
Duh.
"And you've got paper stuck to your back." Maud added, pointing at the two sheets stuck to Pinkie's back. They were helpfully labelled 'Wings'.
"What's the punishment for insulting a princess' wings? Do I make them eat cake or something like that?" Surprise tapped a hoof on her chin thoughtfully. "Anyway, more importantly, you found my Element of Wishes!"
"But it's a rock." Maud said, looking down at me. Dudette, enough with the names, alright?
"No, silly! It's the Element of Wishes! It'll grant you any wish you desire in return for freeing me." Surprise said, generously. "Now, go on, make your wish. Make it special!"
"But I don't have a wish." Maud shook her head.
"Yes, you do." Marble said, patting Maud on the back. "Come on, think about it."
"C'mon, I've got parties to raise and boredom to lower." Surprise said, tapping a royal hoof impatiently. "And I'm sure I've got a little sister sealed away somewhere. I just need to remember where."
"Then, I wish...." Maud took a deep breath, as if steadying herself. "I wish to be able to pretend to be brave and strong."
"No, no, silly!" Surprise giggled gracefully, shaking a hoof dismissively. "You need to wish to be brave and strong, not pretend to be brave and strong!"
"I don't understand." Maud shook her head.
"Just repeat after me." Marble said, patting Maud on her withers. "I wish I can be brave and strong. Like that."
"I wish I can be brave and strong. Like that." Maud repeated, obediently.
"Your wish is granted, young filly!" Surprise smiled, slowly stepping backwards into her billowing cloud of white smoke. She briefly popped her head out of the smoke to quickly add, "Oh, and to prove yourself, and to have just a little more fun, you need to go use the Element of Wishes to make sure that meanie-pants Discord stays sealed in his rocky prison. Alright, have fun!" She disappeared back into her plume of smoke.
"Um, wh-what about my wish?" Limey Pie called out after her from beneath her frozen gummy bear. "Wait! Awwwww!" She moaned in disappointment.
"I'm now brave and strong?" Maud asked, tilting her head to one side curiously. "I don't feel different."
"That's why you need to prove yourself." Marble said, pointing a hoof out of a nearby doorway. Beyond, amidst a grand plaza outside, stood a towering rock candy statue gleaming in the fiery buttercup sunset. Everything from the mismatched claws and horns to its ugly draconic mug was unmistakable; It was the nefarious lord of chaos, Discord, frozen in rock sugar forever for his crimes.
"But that's the field." Maud said, eyeing the tall outcropping of rock that stood out in the field outside the other side of the barn. "Ma and Pa says we're not allowed in the field without them watching us."
"But you're brave and strong now." Marble said with a mischievous grin. "Nothing can go wrong."
"'Nothing' she says." Limey Pie sighed, rolling her eyes.
Pinkie Pie bounded up behind them. "Hey, guys, I was so busy licking the glaze off that frosting flower I completely missed the beautiful and awesome alicorn princess Surprise grant Maud's wish and give us our last quest!" She sighed in disappointment. "And I heard she was really funny too. Oh, and beautiful and awesome."
"You didn't miss much." Limey rolled her eyes. "You still got some 'glaze' on your face, by the way."
"Ooh, right." Pinkie giggled, licking her face clean. "Okey dokey loki! Are we going on that final quest or are we going?"
"We shouldn't." Maud said, flatly.
"C'mon, Maud, look!" Marble giggled, running out into the grand plaza. "It's perfectly safe!" She shouted over the sound of the wind picking up.
"If we're quick about it, nopony will ever know." Pinkie nudged Maud encouragingly. "C'mon, race ya!"
"Let's just get this over with so we can all go home." Limey sighed, chasing after her sisters.
"Wait, no." Maud raised a hoof after her sisters. "We shouldn't."
"See? Nothing to it." Marble said, making it to the massive statue that dominated the centre of the grand plaza.
"You need to bring the Element of Wheezes with you." Limey called back to Maud, stepping into the lee of the statue for shelter from the rising wind.
"Wishes!" Marble corrected.
"Whatever." Limey rolled her eyes.
"Come on, Maud, you can do it." Pinkie called out, before giving a little gasp. "Oooh, twitchy hooves! Twitchy hooves!" She raised a twitching forehoof.
Oh, pebbles. Not this again.
"What does this one mean?" Marble asked, suddenly worried, casting her eye out for trouble. "Don't tell me this whole plaza was made of soggy flapjacks all along."
"It's probably Ma and Pa realizing what we're doing and coming out to ground us." Limey sighed, resigning herself to her fate.
"No, worse!" Pinkie looked around, worriedly. "It's bullies!"
"The thunder guardians of the statue!" Marble gasped, "How could I have forgotten about them!"
"Cause you just made them up." Limey wasn't even trying anymore, grabbing Marble's binoculars from where they hung around her neck. "I see'em. Three pegasi, nine o'clock. Probably those bullies from Cloudsdale." She clicked her tongue, dropping the binoculars.
"Wait, we missed tea?!" Pinkie gasped, clutching her face in horror. "Why'd my tea time sense not go off?!"
"Quick, hide!" Limey Pie wisely pulled her sisters behind the rock.
"What're we even doing down here, DB?" The cracker-coloured thunder guardian flying on the right of the 3-pony formation asked.
"Boss wants to be anywhere, as long as it's away from Rainbow Crash." A sour-grapes-coloured thunder guardian muttered. "Jeez, just cause she managed to turn the tables on us just once."
"Shut up. Shut up, you two!" The centre figure in their flight formation, a thunder guardian the colour of black lightning clouds, barked angrily at his followers. "I'm just looking for a little change of pace, that's all. And lookee here, I just found us exactly what we wanted."
"Rocks?" The cracker-coloured one asked.
"No, Hoops, you dweebster!" The one called DB snapped at his lackey. "Look, we have ourselves some earth ponies."
"Oooh! Oooh! Four little earth ponies, smaller than us!" The sour-grapes one chuckled excitedly.
"They were squirming around in the mud so much I thought they were worms!" The one called Hoops laughed.
"Earth worms!" The sour-grapes one supplied, grunting with laughter.
"Hey, earth ponies! What're you doing out here? Gathering rocks for dinner? Cause I thought you eat dirt." DB taunted.
"Hey, leave my sisters alone!" Limey Pie stepped out from behind the rock to shout back at the thunder guardians.
"Limey!" Marble cried after her.
"Hey, don't like it? Come up here and tell it to my face." Hoops taunted. "Oh, right, forgot, you can't fly!"
"It's not right to be tribalist!" Limey shouted, angrily. "Don't you remember Hearthswarming Eve?!"
"Oh, right, I completely forgot." DB chuckled, nudging his stooges. "C'mon, guys, we need to say we're sorry."
"Doh, we do?" The sour grapes one asked, intelligently.
"Sure we do. We're pegasi. We need to give the earth ponies their weather." DB gloated as he spun around, compacting vapour out of the air into clouds in his wings. He pulled it into his forehooves, spinning and squeezing it tight. It quickly grew dark as it crackled ominously with the telltale flickers of lightning. "C'mon guys, let's give'em a little spark of life."
"Heheheh, yeah." His lackeys gathered little thunder clouds of their own in their forehooves.
"Hey! You shouldn't be playing with thunder clouds outside flight school! I know you shouldn't!" Limey shouted, backing away slowly.
"Limey, get behind me!" Pinkie pulled Limey behind her, pushing her securely against the rock, using herself as a shield.
"We need to run for it!" Limey squeaked.
"No, if we run into the field we'll get zapped. We're safer underneath the statue." Marble said in one of her rare shows of reason as she joined Pinkie in shielding their little sister. "Maud! Call a grownup! Quick!" She shouted at Maud who was still standing in the safety of the temple with me.
"Come on, earth ponies! We're bringing the weather, so you need to start farming!" DB shouted, giving his thunder cloud a firm smack with a forehoof. A blast of lightning burst forth from the cloud, lancing down straight at the little fillies. It struck the rock just above them. Shrieks of fear filled the air as the little fillies cowered together protectively.
Those pegasi are really asking for it! But what can I do?
Maud fared no better. She had thrown herself behind a haybale at the crack of thunder. She curled up in fear, pulling her ears down over her head as more blasts of thunder filled the air.
"Come on, we wanna see you eat some dirt!" The feral voice of DB cackled maniacally. "Not enough weather for you to find something to eat? Well, have some more!"
Maud whimpered softly as another boom of thunder filled the air. Her eyes watered as she heard her sisters shriek in fright. "Maud!" Marble cried in desperation over the blasts of thunder. "Please, get help!" She was quickly silenced by a particularly loud blast.
"Maud? Isn't that the mute one?" Hoops asked.
"Mute? I thought she was just a rock." DB laughed.
"Maudy rock mute as a schmuck." The sour-grapes one sang.
That was uncalled for! I felt a raging anger seethe. I may not like Maud all that much, but nopony deserves that!
I felt a pang of realization strike at my stony heart.
That's how I had been seeing Maud all this time.
Just a plain, quiet, awkward filly who can't even play Let's Pretend properly....who by extension can never play with me. Was that it? Was that why I've been so bitter towards her all this time? For such a trivial, petty little reason?
That seething anger was for nopony but myself. No, Maud didn't deserve that. She deserved better.
Maybe there's a chance. Maybe I can finally get off my backside, reach out to her and give her better, at least a little bit, or crumble trying.
Maud! Don't listen to them!
Maud tensed up at the insults, trembling uncontrollably. "I'm not strong. I'm not brave." She whimpered to herself. "I can't even move." She squeaked, tears running down her cheeks in earnest.
If I could sigh I would have sighed. If I could scream I would have screamed. But all I could do was, well, pretend. For as long as the game lasted, that is all I can do. But perhaps, if I can get somepony to play the game with me....
Even Maud. No, especially Maud. In fact, if she can learn to play this game with me, we can do anything!
I guess that means becoming her bestest best friend.
You know what? Come to think of it this could be all flavours of awesome.
Maud, let's pretend.
"H-huh?"
Let's pretend. Let's pretend that I'm your bestest best friend ever.
"B-but...you're just a rock." She sniffled.
Trust your sisters, Maud. I'm your best friend. As long as you can be brave, I'll protect you, no matter what. Together we can stop those bullies.
"You can't do that. You can't do anything." Maud shook her head in despair. "Just like me. Because that's all we are. Useless rocks."
That's why, Let's Pretend.
"You're. Just. A. Rock." Maud hissed, a subtle but obvious flame kindling in her eyes.
It's called make-believe for a reason. I still believe. More than you. Or do you want to prove something?
"You're just a rock!" Maud cried, slowly rising to her shaky hooves. "You're mute! You're not brave! Not strong! You can't make friends! You can't even save them! You shouldn't ever have been born!" She barked, rearing back. "Just go away! Nopony needs you!" With an almighty cry she hurled her forehooves down on me.
I gave way. I cracked. I smashed into pieces beneath her overwhelming strength.
She gave a little gasp. Her little hooves scrabbled backwards in her shock. She slipped on the fragments of rock, falling back onto her rump. She panted as she eyed her shaky forehooves, unable to wrap her mind around what she just did.
She, a little filly, crushed a mighty rock, me, with her bare hooves.
You're strong, Maud. Stronger than you think. And that's without pretending.
"I...I'm..." Maud whispered in disbelief. I could see it. I could see her slowly but surely crack open, ready to bloom.
Now, Let's Pretend.
Maud gave a little gulp, lowering her trembling forehooves to peer back out towards her sisters. "For them." She whispered, with growing certainty. "I can pretend I'm anything." Her gaze narrowed into a look of fierce determination.
The rocky prison that housed the mighty lord Discord, scion of chaos, trembled under the life-giving lightning bolts from the evil thunder spirits. It rumbled menacingly as it slowly but surely leaned forwards, intent on crushing the three little fillies cowering at its base. Their sacrifice would become the lifeblood that would power his resurrection and allow his return to Equestria.
Maud eyed the pillar of rock that was slowly tilting forwards, about to crush her sisters curled up beneath it. She scrabbled back onto her hooves, galloping hard across the wide abyss that suddenly opened up between herself and Lord Discord. Her eyes glinted with a fiery new light. Every breath she panted was filled with renewed purpose. The grand plaza began to collapse away into swirling nothingness around them, leaving just her and Discord. She took a running leap. She leapt. She soared. She sailed through the dark and thundery air. She pulled back a forehoof, then another.
The valiant knight Maud, guardian of the four adventurers, flew through the air borne by the powers of the Element of Wishes. Her forehooves glowed with a overwhelming power. Its radiance told her to believe in them, believe in herself. "I believe." Maud gave a soft whisper.
Lord Discord roared menacingly as he broke out of his stony prison, lashing out wildly for Maud and her sisters. But his eyes betrayed his confusion. Before him a single filly sallied forth against him, with nothing but her empty hooves. But in them she carried a light stronger than any other. It was the one light he feared more than anything. It was the light of a single wish.
"I love them. You won't take them." Maud declared. Her forehooves struck Discord in the heart. Sparks and lances of prismatic light erupted forth from the impact, lighting up the twilight. The almighty lord of chaos gave a roar of anguished rage as he glared back at Maud in defiance. He fought. He struggled. He roared some more. But his stony cold heart was no match for Maud and her almighty wish. He finally gave way, shattered, exploded into a spray of dust and debris beneath Maud's relentless hooves. The comet of light that was the valiant knight Maud soared through his remains, dispersing them into the four winds.
What remained of the lord of chaos rained down harmlessly all around them, falling away into the deep dark abyss from whence disharmony came. Maud landed by her sisters, hooves trailing little plumes of smoke and dust. Slowly, purposely, she turned. Then, without warning, she shot a look at the flying thunder guardians hovering above.
The three thunder guardians, still struggling to find their jaws wherever they had dropped them in the field when Maud smashed the statue into fine dust, quickly leapt into each other in fear. In their panic they let go of their miniature thunder clouds, allowing them to run free. And like any good thunder cloud they quickly turned on the nearest target - them, blasting them all with lances upon lances of lightning. With frazzled shrieks the three were zapped, zapped and zapped some more. When they were finally allowed to fall to the ground they were but singed cinders trailing smouldering smoke.
"They'll live." Marble muttered, watching the little plume of black smoke rise from their crash site, "Their skulls look thick enough to be lightning-proof."
"For their sake I hope you're right." Limey giggled.
"Maud! You saved us!" Pinkie cried, leaping into Maud to deliver a bone-crushing hug. "That was amazing!"
"Yes." Maud quickly agreed under threat of losing a rib or two.
"You defeated Discord himself!" Marble squeaked, hopping excitedly around the assorted rubble that was once the mighty Discord. "That was, like, double amazing!"
"Where's the rock?" Limey asked, looking around for me. "Uh, I mean, the Element of Wishes."
"You mean my bestest best friend, Boulder?" Maud asked, smiling a soft little smile.
"Oh, you gave him a name?" Pinkie giggled, releasing Maud. "Oooh, this calls for a super duper extra special You-got-name'd party!" She rubbed her forehooves together excitedly.
"Yes. He helped me." Maud nodded, solemnly. "He helped me find courage. He showed me strength."
"I knew he had it in him!" Pinkie cheered.
"He's a rock." Limey muttered. "He's got rocks in him."
"Where's our party colt then?" Marble chuckled.
"Well...." Maud sighed, looking around at the scattered pieces that was once me. "Boulder's with me. He always will be." Maud said, turning around a little to show them her blank flank. Except it wasn't bare anymore. There, upon her flank, was a mark reminiscent of a certain bestest best friend. "As long as I'm brave and strong." She nodded to herself. "He'll protect me."
"You mean, he's...." Pinkie drooped a little. "Aww, Maud..." She quickly launched herself at her sister and drowned her in a tight embrace. "It's alright, I'm sure he's absolutely totally stupendously proud of you."
"We all are, Maud!" Marble couldn't help but join in pulling her irresistibly adorable sister into a tight hug. "Limey, come on! It's huggle snuggle time!"
"Wait a sec. The game's still on, right?" Limey bent down briefly. "Look, I found Boulder. He's still alive. Cause I say so." She said, picking 'me' up off the ground.
Yeah, that's right! Don't write me off as dead that easily! It'll take more than a tiny filly's little temper tantrum to end me! Though, can we please not try that again?
Maud eyed 'me' for a little while, before allowing herself a little smile. "Yes." She nodded, simply.
"He's good at hide'n'seek, isn't he?" Pinkie giggled. "Come on, bring him into the huggle-snuggle!"
"Yeah, yeah." Limey giggled, pulling me into the tightest, warmest sisterly snuggle ever. There are many things that can bring four sisters and a rock close together. Defeating the mighty lord Discord and his thunder guardians was, thankfully, one of them.
"By the way..." Limey added, fidgeting nervously amidst the hug.
"Yes?" Her sisters replied.
"What are we going to tell Ma and Pa about their prized rock?" Limey asked, pointing at the remains of the massive rock tower that the Pie family had painstakingly grown for a long, long while.
"Err...." The Pie sisters looked at each other before quickly coming to a silent agreement. "Boulder did it."
Oh pebbles.
Years later
The Friendship Express to Ponyville
A lone mare sat on her haunches in one of the train's many private booths, an open book in her forehooves, a graphite pencil bit firmly in her mouth. She tilted her head from one side to another before allowing the pencil to drop onto her open book. "Rocks, these are my rocks. Sediments make me...." She mused out loud. "Hmm, Boulder, what rhymes with 'Sediments'?" She asked nopony in general.
Sometimes I'm a rhyming muse, giving the world's best poet a helping hoof here and there.
"'Sedimental', perfect. Thank you, Boulder." The mare said softly in approval. "Oh." She looked out the window at the acres upon acres of apple orchards sailing by under the bright afternoon sun. The sea of green and red spread out for miles, heralding the approach of the small but cozy town of Ponyville. "Boulder. We will be arriving in Ponyville soon." She noted. "I will be meeting with Pinkie's friends soon. I hope I can get along with them."
And sometimes I'm a young mare's best friend.
"Thank you, Boulder. I hope so too." The mare nodded, closing her book and preparing her bag.
But to be honest? For as long as we play this game, I can be anything she could ever want me to be.
"That's a good idea, Boulder." For the first time in a long while I saw her smile. And it was beautiful. "Yes. Let's Pretend..."
Author's Note
Hope you all enjoyed that as much as I enjoyed writing it.
This is my first ever fanfic competition entry. I'm quite excited.
I'd greatly appreciate any help with spotting typos/errors. Thanks!
Usual Disclaimer: My Little Pony is the property of the amazingriffic Faust and Hasbro.
