Equestria Warriors

The CMR-50 clanked as Garret jogged.

   "Hey, I thought the CMR could fold up."

   "I never liked that feature. Made it wobbly and had less power. So I made the CMk2R."

   "Whoa, made? How? Mikey was the gunsmith."

   "I don't know. My CMR got screwed up, and I thought 'Gee, I wish I had a new one' and bam, a brand new CMR sat beside me. I thought I could do it again, so I made the Mk2. I'll show you my shed."  We walked in silence for a minute before a small bungalow came into view.

   "Fluttershy, I brought a guest, is that OK?" A small squeak came from the house.

   "Aw, shit. Hey, Chris, stay here." He gave a sympathetic grin. "She's incredibly shy."

   I nodded. "Sure, I'll just look around." Garret vanished inside. Muffled conversation came from indoors while I looked around. I saw a few animal pens, and a small shed, probably Garret's gunshed. I breathed in, and smelled the fresh air, and the sweet scent of pine. It reminded me of my parent's cabin, deep in the woods of Osoyoos.

   "Hey, Chris!" Garret's shout snapped me out of my daydreaming. I turned to see him standing beside another pony. She was had a pale peach coat, a bright pink mane, and bright blue eyes.

   "This is Fluttershy. Honey, this is Chris, my old squadron leader."

   "H-hi." She whispered.

   "Hi." I put my hoof out to shake. She didn't except. I motioned towards the pens.

   "I see you like animals. Garret was an apprentice vet before he joined up."

   "Hey! I was a full vet before!"

   "Bullshit, you inspected a dog and said it had testicular cancer before you turned it over and saw it was pregnant!" I roared with laughter. Fluttershy laughed too, and warmed up to me.

   "Chris, do you want to join us for dinner?"

   "I don't want to be any trouble."

   "Oh, it's no trouble at all. I always feed any leftovers to the animals."

   "I'm really not that hungry. I've gotta get back and grab my tent..."

   "No, you can sleep here. I have two bedrooms."

   "Ok, I'll crash on the sofa."

   "No, you can have the guest bedroom. Me and Garret can share a bed." She gave a sly look at Garret. He coughed.

   "Ahem. Uh...How about I show you my shed?"

   "Sure. Hey, you know how you made a sniper without knowing how?" We walked away from the house, towards the small shed.

   "Yeah."

   "Well, I made a plane." Garret froze for a second, before hitting my shoulder.

   "Always have to one up me, eh?"

   "Ow, shit dude." We reached the door.

   "Welcome... to the inner sanctum." Garret said. He opened the door and I saw tons of sniper rifles, scopes, ammo and clips everywhere.

   "Tis a bit of a mess." I said.

   "So? I've got everything. From the Springfield and Kar98k, to the SVU and the Ballista."

   "Whoa, wait. Those don't exist."

   "They do now. I also have shit tons of rounds, AP to Incendiary. Even hollowpoint."

   "Damn."

   "Here, I need to ask you something." Garret grabbed a rifle, slung it over his back and walked outside. "Follow me." He walked to small targeting range and set the sniper up on it's tripod and laid down. For a second he was still, then the gun boomed and the target cracked in half. He let the rife off his shoulder and turned to me.

   "Did I pull the trigger?"

   "Yeah."

   "Watch again." He waited until I was beside his before he fired again. His hoof nor the trigger moved.

   "What the hell?"

   "I know. Weird huh? Hey, make a plane for me."

   "Wha... here? Fuck, I still don't know how I did it the first time."

   "What did you do?"

   "I closed my eyes, concentrated on a plane I knew, and it appeared."

   "So do it again."

   "Ok." I closed my eyes and concentrated once more on the F-35. Power surged for a second time and again the plane squatted on the grass.

   "Dang."

It was late when I turned in. Me and Garret had stayed up trading old stories before Fluttershy motioned him to bed.

  The next morning came way too fast. The light shining in my eyes, I groggily stood, made the bed and stumbled downstairs to see Fluttershy making eggs.

   "Good morning" she called. I mumbled a "morning" before sitting down at the table.

   "Garret left to do some shooting. Here you go." She laid a plate of egg in front of me. I tucked in. After a while I came up for air.

   "Man, this is delicious. Thank you."

   "You're welcome.  Unfortunately you seem to be the only one to be eating this morning." She glanced towards a small white rabbit who wasn't eating.

   "You know, we cooked rabbits who didn't eat where I came from." I said offhandedly. The rabbit immediately gulped down a mouthful.

   "Good Angel."

I shovelled the last bit of egg into my mouth before standing. "Thanks for the room and the breakfast. I gotta get going."

"So soon?"

I slung my speakers over my shoulder. "Yeah. Tell Garret I said bye."

   "Ok."

I began the long walk to town. The morning air was peaceful, and full of birdsong. I decided it was too quiet and pulled out my speakers.

   "Time for rock." I said, tapping the playlist labeled 'Volume11'. Iron Maiden burst through, with 'These Colours Don't Run.' Bobbing my head along with the beat, I continued my march. I reached town just as 'Two Minutes to Midnight' ended. Ponies glared red-eyed through slits in windows and doors. I was stopped by Twilight who asked if I was alright.

   "Yeah. I just had a moment there."

   "Ok. Celestia sent me a message. She wants to see you."

   "Ok, I'll send a picture."

   "She needs to talk to you about the...things that you...you..."

   "Shot down."

   "That you shot down yesterday. She wants to talk as soon as possible."

   "Can I piss first?"

   "No."

              An hour later we stood at the mouth of a giant castle. Guards in armour stood at attention. I snorted.

   "Thats the protection? One crazed fucker with a M-16 could mow down the whole regiment. Hell, one plane with decent bombs could fuck this place over."

Twilight gave me a weird look and walked past the guards. I stepped past, muttering. We walked through a couple sets of doors until we found the throne room. Rows of stained glass windows reflected light through, causing strange patterns along the floor.

   "One sniper..." I whispered to Twilight.

   "Shhh!"

I looked around as we waited for 'Princess' Celestia. I noticed another pony in the back corner and gave her a crooked, flyboy grin. She smiled back. Score one for me.

   "She's coming! Quick, bow!" Twilight dove to the ground so fast I thought mortars were falling.

   "Fuck that." I said, standing tall, and ramrod straight. "I bow for nobody." I thought I heard an "Alright" from the other pony in the corner. Score two. Celestia walked in and gave me a hard look. I gave her a big fuck-off glare.

   "Valton Ace, do you know what you have done?"

   "Uh, breathed in?"

   "Don't get smart. You have killed six members of the Changeling delegation! They were flying in to show us a new invention they had crea-"

   "Are you fucking kidding?" I spat. "Those 'inventions' almost killed me, Twilight, Applejack and Dash! They were escorting a bomber, while flying in attack formation, and they shot at me! I did what I thought was right!"

   "What you did was get the Changelings angry! They've threatened war!" Celestia practically shouted.

   "Well, fuck them! The bomber could have levelled the town, and come back here for seconds! Would you rather have five soldiers on your conscience, or one thousand civilians who were doing nothing? You can take your crown and shove it up-" A burst of laughter made me turn. The other pony was rolling in the floor laughing.

   "Luna! That is not funny!" Celestia huffed.

   "Actually...hahaha...It is!" She giggled.

   "Yeah, it is." Another voice, with a British accent, called from the door way. "How you doing, you Canadian Cunt!" My jaw fell.

   "Holy shit, the British Bastard?"

   "The one and only." He shook off his armor, and it clattered to the floor. A pale, white unicorn faced me. I ran towards him and hugged him.

   "Dude! I thought you were dead!"

   "Whoa, no homo mate!" I broke away. "It takes more than an Ivan missile to kill Willis Tromer!"

Celestia turned to Twilight as the two pilots left the castle. "That...didn't go as expected.”

                 Me and Willis walked amid the crowded streets of Canterlot, as he called it. People ran to and fro, and stores peddled their wares. This was obviously the 'rich' neighbourhood.

   "Remember Charlie?"

   "Fuck yeah, the guy who snorted the whole bottle of beer?"

   "Yeah! Do you remember when we hired the stripper for his birthday?"

I laughed. "Yeah. The world’s biggest nosebleed, then he ran off to his bunk."

We kept laughing as we walked. I stopped to check out a store that sold hats.

   "Wish I still had my old Jets hat." I said, while a small alarm bell rung in my head. Three colts I had seen before were standing about a block away, staring at me and Willis.

   "They don't have my style." I said, and began to walk away. I leaned in close and whispered. "We're being followed."

Willis didn't break stride. "Yeah, they only have really shitty hats." He whispered back. "Saw them too. Two unis and a pegasus."

   "Yeah, it sucks." We turned left onto a side street, then ducked into an alley. The three followers walked up to the alley and started down it. The leader had a blue coat, an his cronies were red.

   "Sup guys!" I said. They didn't answer. "Okay... Hey, Willis, do you remember the Butcher?"

   "Yeah."

   "Remember his favourite lesson?"

   "Fuck yeah."

We slowly went into a combat stance, altered because of our new... bodies. The three kept coming. The pegasus flipped up into the air.

   "Ready." I called.

   "Set." Willis replied.

   "FUCKING DO IT!" We shouted together. I leapt, and gave a crashing right hook into the lead unicorn. Teeth and green blood hit the pavement. The unicorn changed midair. A Changeling lay on the pavement, holding it's jaw and hissing at me.

   "Shit, more of these bastards."

Willis grunted. The other unicorns' disguise flickered, and the Changeling fell, shrieking and Willis snapped it's leg with a crunch.

  "They look like fucking bugs!"

The pegasus curled and dove down. I ducked as he swooped and came around for another pass. This time I was ready. As he dove I smashed my hoof into his face. A sickening, wet crack filled the air as the pegasus' nose shattered, caving in the skull. I fell back from the impact.

   "Jesus Chris. You fucking killed 'im!" With his accent it sounded like 'focking'.

   "I...guess I did. Ahh, shit.”

   "Whats up?"

   "Fucking shoulder hurts like fuck." I rotated my arm and I felt my shoulder click. "Jesus."

   Will glanced at me. "Theres a medical place around here somewhere."

   "Yeah, sure. We jut walk in, covered in Changeling blood and ask to get patched up. We gotta get cleaned up first."

   "Theres a river nearby. I don't really want my stab wound frozen though." He looked back at where the Changeling tried to run him through with his horn. Blood oozed out, making his white coat stained red.

   "Fuck it. I'm going in. I'll say I tripped and green paint spilled on me."

The medical office was a gleaming white. A giant red cross squatted on the side of the building. I limped through the doors and approached the front desk. A nurse looked at me from over her glasses.

    "Canterlot Medical Office, how can we make you feel better today?" She said in a flat, bored voice.

   "Hi. I fell and injured my shoulder." I gave a bit of a wince as I lifted it up.

   "Okay, just have a seat and the doctor will see you shortly. Your name, sir?"

   "Valton. Valton Ace ma'am."

She lifted up her pen and made a quick note. "Take a seat please. NEXT!"

I sat on one of the couches, and closed my eyes. The adrenaline began fading when I walked through the doors. It was all I could do to not fall asleep.

   "Valton...Ace?" A voice called. I snapped to. The voice sounded familiar. I turned and saw a unicorn with a light purple coat wearing a doctors coat over a green and brown shirt.

   "Yep." I said back and I watched his eyes light up with recognition.

   "Holy Moly! Chris? It's me, Tes!"

   "Holy- man, it's good to see another familiar face."

   "What do you mean?" He looked puzzled.

   "Will and Garret are here too." A grin spread across his face.

   "Heck yeah. Karen, take the rest of the day off." He looked back at me. "I have some catching up to do."

   "First, can you take care of my shoulder? It's killing me."

   "Sure. What'd you do to it anyway?"

   "Got into a fight with some Changelings. Think I killed one and Willis broke another one's leg."

   "Jeez."

A couple minutes later with my shoulder reset and not hurting as much, we wandered through town trying to find Willis. We finally found him near the river, scooping water with his magic and cleaning his wound. A quick stitch later, and we kept walking.

   "So you just... shot them down? No warning?"

   "I was running on autopilot. I reacted like I normally would."

   "And the Bitch yelled at you, huh?"

   "Who?"

   "Celestia. I call her the Bitch because she made me work in the hospital when she found out I was a field doc. She went through all my stuff too. I had to hide my scalpel."

   "Scalpel?"

   "My Remington. It's in there somewhere, folding stock and all.

   "You know Tes, I don't think I've ever heard you fucking swear." Willis said. "You were always a 'Holy Moly' kind of guy."

   "Yeah man, what about that?" I probed.

   "I just hate her so much, I have to swear."

   "Well, I'm so fucking glad you sta-" A burst if gunfire halted Willis mid-sentence.

   "Shit, that came from the castle!"

   "Well, what the fuck are we waiting for? Lets get our asses out of park!" We ran.

Celestia and Twilight were discussing Twilights studies when the stained glass that decorated the hall shattered. Changelings stormed in, holding aloft long, slender tubes with their magic.

   "What is the meaning of this?" Celestia cried. "Guards, seize them!" A pair of unicorns rushed the intruders.

*broop*

A loud noise blasted from one of the tubes, and both guards went down.

   "Ssssss." A Changeling hissed, motioning towards Celestia. A slightly larger Changeling approached her.

   "Ahh, Princess. It appears we shall finally meet. I am...well, my name is no concern to you. You won't need it for long. And you are?" he asked Twilight. "No matter. I have no need for two prisoners. Dispose of her." A Changeling raised his tube. Before he could fire, another blast rocked the hall. The Changeling's body exploded, bits of bone, skin and green blood flying everywhere.

   "You didn't make a reservation." Willis growled from behind Tes, who's Remington clacked ominously.

   "Well, the guards accepted ours." The large Changeling replied, pointing to the two dead bodies on the ground.

   "You fucking bastard." Valton snarled.

   "Kill them." He replied. Suddenly the hall was once again filled with noise.

*ratatatatatat* *ratatatat*

"What the hell?" I muttered. The Changelings were dropping like flies as what sounded like a Light Machine Gun fired from outside. The long bursts continued until all of them were dead. Then a voice called from outside.

   "'Bought fucking time I got to shoot something." I felt a grin spread as Tes laughed.

   "Hey Griz! Where were you before this kicked off?"

   "Goddamn. You still kickin' Will?"

   "He is, and so am I, and Tes and Garret!" I yelled back.

   "Good! I was tired of being the only fucking badass in this place."