A New World, An Old Haunt

by Professor Frogenshtein

Rating: teen
Tags: Crossover, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, Romance, Adventure
Length: 32883

'A New World, A New Way' spinoff - Dante Amaranth is determined to become the world's greatest ghost-type pokemon trainer, but an unplanned change in scenery leaves him feeling not quite himself...

Yet another spinoff of zeusdemigod131's A New World, A New Way.
As a semi-experienced pokemon researcher and specialist, Dante Amaranth has befriended and captured one of almost every ghost-type pokemon; the only missing species is the elusive yamask. Dante and his ghostly crew are planning a trip to find themselves a new comrade. The night before they're supposed to leave, however, a certain recently released legendary enacts a little 'change of scenery'...

Published 2014-08-31 20:20:06 UTC
Last updated 2015-04-21 07:38:23 UTC

Ch 2: Face Facts

I rolled over, grimaced, and rolled over again. I simply could not get comfortable; it felt like I was laying on a pile of gemstones. Groaning, I opened my eyes.

I was laying on a pile of gemstones.

"This is not my beautiful bed," I mused aloud. My eyes opened further, taking in the scene around me; I looked to be in a dank cave, surrounded by all manner of gems and shiny things.

"This is not my beautiful house," I posited, hoisting myself up from the pile. A crunching sound to my left caught my attention; I was situated next to a small purple creature with razor-sharp teeth and pointed ears, with deep blue hexagonal eyes that sparkled like diamonds. In its claws was a large sapphire with a clear bite taken out of it.

"You are not my beautiful wife." At this, the creature turned its eyes to me, a glint of confusion in its crystalline eyes.

"The master is not married," it said through a mouthful of mineral.

I rolled my eyes. "I was making a joke. Hello, Ravid."

Ravid was a sableye, a cave-dwelling pokémon that ate gems, and one of the 2 known species of ghost/dark types. Legends say, and research has corroborated, that sableyes' rocky diet has transformed their eyes into gemstones over the course of centuries. Recruiting Ravid had put a considerable strain on my funds until Ravid himself had confided in me that ghost-types don't actually need to eat.

Ravid shrugged from his place in the gem mound, then called out to seemingly no-one. "Sword! Shadow! The master is awake!"
"Hey boss," came a voice as a swirl of darkness seemed to materialize in front of me, "you were asleep for a while." Lucius flashed a cheshire grin as he took a seat next to me.

“Indeed, Sire,” came another voice, and I saw the hilt of a familiar sword poking out of a pile of yet more gems and treasures, “Things were, if you’ll pardon my language, terribly dull around here.” Lucius loosed a guffaw. “Hah, dull!” he chortled, “Because he’s a sword! Good one!” Ravid just sat and chewed. “Ravid does not get it, master.” a pause. “Master?”
I wasn’t listening; I’d just had a startling realization. “Lucius,” I began, looking nervously at the shadow pokemon, “Where are we? I can’t feel my legs, and… I’m not breathing.” Lucius looked at me, his expression growing solemn. “That’s, well… You might want to look at yourself, boss.” he gestured to Durendal, who withdrew his gleaming blade from the pile of gems. Without thinking, I floated (floated?) over to get a better view. Durendal kept his blade flawlessly polished, and I looked in through the metallic sheen to see my reflection.

A yamask stared back at me, holding a shining, golden face.

My face.

I dropped to the ground in shock, looking at my hands; they were black, 3-fingered, ethereal. I took the golden mask in my hands and stared into its lifeless golden eyes. There was no mistaking it.

I was a yamask. A ghost.

Dead.

Words failed me as I struggled to form a coherent thought. “I… I-I don’t-” I felt a hand on my shoulder; Lucius had floated over to me. “We all knew it would happen one way or another, boss.” The small, sad smile he gave looked unnatural on his face. “But I was always afraid I’d have to say goodbye.” A sob escaped my lips as I turned to hug my oldest friend, and was both surprised and comforted when my arms didn’t go through him like I expected. We floated to the ground and sat there for a while, Lucius comforting me as the others watched. After a time, I looked up and gave a sad smile of my own. “Do you know the worst part?” I asked, gazing down at my face- at my mask. “What’s that, boss?” and I chucked a bit to myself at the worry in my friend’s voice.

“I never grew that moustache like I always wanted to.”

Years in the past (but not more than 10)

Today was the day, gastly was sure of it. Today he’d show the world that ghosts were nothing to be afraid of, that they were just as capable of loving and being loved as any pokémon. Today, he would succeed.

He had a cunning plan.

Being captured by that human in the white coat had been stage 1, because gastly knew he handed pokémon to beginning trainers; now it was simply a matter of sneaking into the lineup and getting a child to pick him as a starter. He’d practiced his winning smile over and over in the mirror, and being able to speak human would definitely give him an edge. Gastly would succeed, he was sure of it.

Gastly enacted stage 2: he slipped parts of his gaseous form through the thin cracks in the edge of the pokéball, floating it through the hallways and settling in with the “standard” starters while the white-coated human wasn’t looking. Drawing completely back into the ball, gastly waited for the trainers to arrive. His plan was so cunning; he would definitely succeed, he had assured himself of that.

Gastly waited a while; he wasn’t sure how long he waited, bit it had definitely been at least a bit of a while. Then, gastly heard bits of voices from outside.

“…ttle down, you young…need to rush…choosing a pokémon…lifelong partnership…from the ones you see here.”

That was his cue! Gastly burst from his ball in a flash of red, smiled as wide as he could and said “Hi! I’m gastly!” His cunning plan was surely about to succeed!

But to gastly’s complete surprise, the children screamed and ran in what looked a lot like terror. Even the man in the white coat had collapsed, almost as if he had fainted from fright. This confused gastly; he couldn’t have frightened them, he’d practiced his smile in the mirror for 5 whole minutes! And his plan- surely, a plan as cunning as his would have succeeded, right?

“Cool!”

Gastly was brought out of his thoughts by a small voice. There, in the corner, was a young boy gastly had not noticed before; the boy’s hair was scruffy, his shirt rumpled, and he was giving gastly a smile wide enough to show a missing tooth starting to grow back in. The child strode over to the man in the coat, who was still on the ground.

“Professor!” the boy spoke, pointing at gastly as he looked at the man on the floor, “Can I have that one?”

He was met with a half-aware groan as a response.

“Kay, thanks!” Grabbing gastly’s pokéball, the boy walked over to a computer and pressed a few buttons, placing a small red device under a scanner with the ball next to it. After a few seconds, there was an audible ding!, and the boy walked back over to gastly. “I’m Dante, and I’m your new trainer,” he said, and gastly’s smile returned full force. “I’m gastly!” The boy shook his head. “Nuh-uh. I’m your trainer, so I get to give you a new name!” the boy’s hand went to his chin as he stood in thought. “I’ll call you Lucius.”

Gastly thought it over. Loosey-us; it sounded like a nice name. Lucius smiled at his new trainer. “Sounds good to me, boss!” And as the new friends set out for adventure, Lucius had no doubt that Dante had thought of a cunning plan. A plan Lucius knew would succeed.

He’d make sure of it.

Ch 3: A Dog and Pumpkin Show?

Diamond Dog underground hidey place

Outside gem cave

Rover was having a good day. Biscuits, one of the look-around-ers, had found 2 new shinies above ground that morning: a big gold sword and shield with a purple gem in it and a gold circle with a face on it. All the new shinies were put in the gem cave, and Rover was taking Fido and Spot to count their treasures.

As the 3 diamond dogs approached the large cave full of gems, their sensitive dog ears picked up odd sounds.

"Yama, mask yamask ya."
"Gen gen gar gengar?"
"Bleye sab; sab-sableye"
"...That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard."

Rover didn't remember letting anyone in the gem cave...

"Thieves!" whispered Spot, "they're here to take our gems!"

"We're the only ones who steal gems around here," said Rover. "Fido, open the door!"

"No, I'm serious," I said with a skeptical gaze, "you just dug your way to the nearest source of gems?"

Two diamond eyes stared back at him as a claw indicated the tunnel in the celing. "Ravid could smell them, Master. They smelled so delicious." Ravid grabbed a ruby the size of a baseball and ate it whole. "They taste delicious as well!"

"Pardon me for interrupting, Sire, but do you see my shield?" Durendal was floating about, rummaging through piles of gems with his cloth-like arms.

"It's over here, D," called Lucius, pulling the large golden shield from a heap of emeralds. Durendal rushed over to grab it from the shadow's ghostly grasp. "Be careful," said the sword, "you'll scratch it!"

I moved to get up, but the doors suddenly burst open, and three... creatures rushed in. The creatures didn't look like any pokemon I'd ever seen; the best I could describe them would be sort of like mightyenas or growlithes mixed with vigoroths. I stared at them, confused, and they stared right back.

"What are they?" Asked Lucius.

"We are diamond dogs. What are you?"

I blinked; the question had come from the large blue-grey one. Before I could reply, however, a loud crunch caught the attention of everyone in the room. All eyes turned to the source; Ravid had just bitten into a rather large orange crystal.

"It's eating the gems!" Shouted the medium-sized 'diamond dog' in the red vest. "Guards!" It pointed a front paw at us, "get them!"

As armored brown dogs started pouring through the door, I decided now would be a great time to make an exit. "Lucius, D," I shouted, "shining shield combo, stat!"

Both teammates acted immediately, Durendal grabbing Ravid and myself before bringing up his shield as Lucius placed himself in front of the guards.

"King's shield!"

"Dazzling gleam!"

Lucius let out an enormous burst of light, and the guards all threw up their arms to shield their eyes as I expected. Unfortunately, I didn't count on the light refracting through all the gems in the room, nearly doubling the move's power and sending scattered beans every which way.

"My eyes!" Shouted Ravid as the super-effective move bounced behind Durendal's shield, "The light! It burns Ravid!"

"D, get us out of here!" I ordered. Durendal wasted no time, flying out through the tunnel Ravid came in, and a flash of darkness told me that Lucius was following close behind. We surfaced near the border of some kind of quarry and a dense forest, and quickly fled to the darkness of the trees.

"Were we followed?" I peeked cautiously through the branches, looking for any sign of the so-called 'diamond dogs'. Lucius huffed, crossing his arms. "I doubt it," he said, "we ghosts are master escape artists, remember?"

A pained whine to my left caught my attention. "Oh jeez," I groaned, "Ravid's out of it. Anybody have a revive?"

"Here's one."

"Thanks, Jack." I reached out and took the medicinal crystal before doing a double-take at the hand that offered it. "Jack?!"

With a round black body, a tall orange head, and long hair-like arms, Jack was a gourgeist. Gourgeist are known for their heightened activity on the new moon, skipping down streets and singing cursed songs, and are said to take pleasure in the suffering of prey as they're ensnared in the gourgeists' arms. As a ghost researcher, however, I can tell you that's mostly nonsense; Jack is just a very... huggy pokemon. Case in point, I was currently very glad I didn't have a ribcage to crush as Jack squeezed me within an inch of my newfound afterlife.

"Dan, buddy," said Jack, a little too cheerful, "you didn't tell me you were going to die soon! I was going to take you trick-or-treating next week!"

"It wasn't planned," I said, trying to use my new physiology to escape the crushing embrace, "and Halloween isn't for another three months. Lucius, a little help?" Lucius was, for his part, trying his best not to laugh. "I don't know, boss," he sniggered, "you go out every day wearing that mad scientist costume."

Durendal decided to cut in. "If I may interrupt, Sire," he said, "we still don't know where we are, or where our remaining comrades are located. I suggest we attempt to gather some more information."

I thought about it. Durendal had a point; we had no information on where we were, or how scattered the rest of our group could be. I wrest myself from Jack's grasp and moved to the front of the group. "Alright," I said as I fed the revive to Ravid, "let's go find some answers."

Author's Note

I need to ask some honest questions: do the diamond dogs seem unnecessary? Am I making the chapters too short, and should I combine them? Is it taking me too long to get to the actual ponies? (A pony shows up in the next chapter, and he's the OC who'll be following the group around.)

Ch 5: No Place Like Haunted Home

Author's Note

Who wants to read a poorly-paced chapter that I don't particularly feel like rewriting right now?

[nobody's voice] - I do!

Ch 5: No Place Like Haunted Home

Frothing Stein was enjoying himself quite a lot, considering he was surrounded by ghosts in the middle of the most dangerous forest in equestria. The 'Grand Duke Amaranth' was a wealth of fascinating information, and seemed more than willing to share it; in fact, the Duke had revealed that he was also a professor. Frothing Stein always found it invigorating to hold discussion with another pony of science-- or, in this case, pokémon of science.

"I must say," Stein had said, "you have quite the varied collection of spirits as your allies."

"Actually," the Duke had replied, "this isn't even half of my research team. There are 17 of us total, including myself; I'm hoping they were sent here too."

As the Duke-Professor went on about his missing comerades, a question formed in Stein's head. "With seventeen of you, and some of your partners being as large as you say, wherever did you live-- erm, reside?"

Dante's expression turned wistful. "Ah, our home was a wonderful place," he said, "a great big mansion, trussed up to look old and abandoned. We had rich mahogany boards over the windows, and cobwebs of the finest silk a bug-type could produce. Inside, though, was the most state-of-the-art technology for researching ghost-types, and all the comforts of home alongside them." He sighed. "I can see it now."

"Actually," one of the ghosts, Frothing Stein believed his name was Jack, interjected, "I can see it too! Dan, buddy, I think our house followed us."

All eyes turned to look; there was, indeed, a foreboding mansion just a ways through the trees. "But that's not possible," said the large sword, Durendal, as the group rushed up to the door, "it can't possibly be Sire's castle."

Ravid, the small gremlin creature, jumped up and pressed the doorbell, and was immediately met with an archaic series of chimes that sounded out a funeral march.

Lucius materialized next to Dante, facing the door. "This is definitely our place."

This hardly made sense. My house, just showing up out of the blue in the middle of a forest? It didn't seem very likely that someone would have made a mansion exactly like mine on another planet, either.

I was taken from my thoughts as the door opened, revealing a tall grey statue-like creature covered in patterns and cracks that glowed green.

"Goliath?"

Goliath, a golurk, was a simple pokémon; he fought hard when needed and he protected those close to him. He also didn't technically have a gender, but said he was designated as male after his creation centuries ago. That was the only time he'd ever spoken of his creation, and I've never been able to get him to tell me more, no matter how much it would help my research.

Goliath kneeled down to look at us. "Friends..." He spoke slowly, as always, while examining our group. As his rectangular eyes fell on me, he seemed to freeze. "You..."

"It's me, Goliath. It's Dante."

All at once, the giant began to shake. "No..." Said Goliath, and he reached a shaking hand out to me. "I... Protect... You... Died..." I put both my hands on his arm "Goliath?"

"I... Failed... To... Protect..."

I looked in his eyes, and I gasped; I didn't know golurks could cry.

"Goliath, it's okay," I floated closer to him, and found myself being cradled in his arms. "Goliath, I'm right here; I'm not going to leave you."

"Promise..."

"I promise, Goliath."

"No..." Goliath shook his head, holding me closer, "I... Promise... Never... Fail... Again..."

Long, long ago...

"You are sure this will work?" A young alchemist put the final piece in place as his colleague instructed. It was a small statue, no more than a meter in height, carved of a shining silver stone.

"I have foreseen it," came the reply. "He will be vital in the time of the great shift; he shall stand vigil in great turmoil, a protector."

The young alchemist turned, trying to lock eyes with the psychic; its large round body with branching wings and tail, all striped in different colors like some sort of piñata. "Indeed, sigilyph," he said, "we are making this to protect our eternal queen."

As the psychic pokémon looked on, the alchemist anointed the statue with quicksilver. "We will repel this invasion, and the savages will pay for their crimes." He reached to activate the golem, but found himself stopped by a psychic barrier.

"No."

"Sigilyph?" The alchemist turned back to his partner. He finally met his partner's eyes; in them, he saw great sadness.

"I am sorry, my friend, but the golett is not meant for the invasion; he would only have delayed the inevitable."

"But the queen..."

"The queen will not survive this day." At this the pokémon caressed the alchemist with a wing, and the sound of splintering wood and cracking stone came from just beyond the door. "And though it pains me greatly to say it..." The door was ripped off its hinges as a man in bloodstained armor smashed it through with a mace.

"Neither will we."

Darkness. For the longest time, there was darkness.

"Boss, you won't believe what I just found!"

"Lucius? Hold on, I'll be right there."

Sound. There was movement. Light. A boy. A ghost with the boy.

"Look at it, boss! I've never seen one this color!"

"It's awfully still... Hello? Are you awake?"

A nod.

"Alright cool! My name's Dante, and I'm on a journey to become the world's greatest ghost pokémon master. My partner and I are looking for more pokémon to join our group, do you want to come with us?"

Silence. Leave? Why leave?

...Why not leave?

A second nod.

"Excellent! I think I'll call you Goliath, is that alright?"

Again, a nod.

"It's great to have you Goliath; I love making new friends."

A word.

Friends.

"... I... Protect... Friends..."

Ch 6: Electric BOO-galoo

Professor Frothing Stein looked upon the scene before him, and felt his heart warm; a sad yet beautiful moment of friends reuniting after death.

It's really too bad they're blocking the doorway, though.

"Professor Grand Duke? Not to be rude, but would you care to introduce us?"

Dante jumped a bit, then turned to me with a sheepish grin.

"Right, sorry, I forgot you were there for a sec." He gestured to the large animate statue. "This is Goliath. Goliath, this is Professor Frothing Stein," he said, indicating the stallion, before floating over to the other masked spirit.

What was her name? Binocular fright? Stein simply could not remember.

"And this is Queen Banafrit."

Stein put a hoof to the side of his head. Right, right. Well, I was close.

Stein had not been anywhere near close.

Well you're ugly.

That was uncalled for.

You're right, I'm sorry; you're a perfectly handsome narrative, and I bet the lady narratives all line up to meet you.

Please just stop.

Good idea.

Queen Banafrit perked up slightly at her mention, but quickly hid it with an air of regality.

"And what position does this 'Goliath' hold in your royal court?"

There was a moment of hesitation before Lucius cut in.

"He's our... Um... Head of security! Yes, he defends the castle with an iron fist!"

Frothing Stein snuck over to Jack. "He's not really a Grand Duke, is he?" He whispered.

"Dan buddy? Depends who you you ask; D seems to think he's royalty, and rumor has it that an aegislash can sense leadership qualities."

"And what do you think?"

"I think Dan buddy's head-over-tail for that queenie gal, and I'm not gonna mess this up for him."

"Fair enough."

A third voice cut in.

"Are pony and pumpkin coming inside?"

The two looked up; Ravid was staring pointedly at them from the now clear doorway.

"Right, of course."

"A-heh, yeah."

I was glad for a good many things right now. I was glad because my house was, by some miracle, on this other world. I was glad because Lucius was a grade-A wing-'mon for giving Bana-- Bunny the house tour, and that angel of beauty seemed to like me. I was glad because we'd found Goliath, another of my oldest friends.

Mostly, I was glad because my hat collection was still intact.

"My hats! Oh yes, how I've missed you." I placed my purple top hat on my head. "It still fits! Another miracle!"

"Is Master talking to hats again?"

I whirled around; Ravid was behind me, and Frothing Stein was next to him. I hid my fez and my ten-gallon behind my back.

"Maybe-- I mean no-- I mean-- IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!"

Stein chuckled a little. "It's alright," he said, stepping further into the room, "all proper gentlecolt scientists have their own eccentricities. I love the top hat, by the way."

"Great minds think alike." I gestured to the top hat on Stein's head, which was actually very similar to my own. "Why, if I had a moustache, we could be twins!" I said this in jest, but as I remembered my own hairless lips, my face fell.

The professor seemed to notice this. "I was going to say, about that..." He began to idly scan the walls. "I'm a bit of a potions pony myself; if you like, I could whip up my patented Moustache Elixir."

I was suddenly grabbing his face, my eyes barely an inch away from the lenses of his goggles. "You can do that?!"

"Absolutely. Could you show me to the kitchen?"

I didn't know I could float that fast while carrying a whole pony. Of course, I didn't know ponies were so light either.

I fetched a mug from the cabinet and watched as Stein pulled all manner of beakers and test tubes from his lab coat, mixing in spices and ingredients I'd never heard of.

"Milligram of mandrake root, two teaspoons of poison joke extract, three and one seventh petals of heart's desire, a written invitation to the gentleman's ball, a few Moustachium shavings, and a quick spell while it simmers..." Stein's horn glowed purple as he muttered something under his breath. "Now for the final ingredient..." He pulled a metal flask from his lab coat, unscrewed the top, and turned it upside-down over the mixture.

Nothing came out.

"Oh goodness, I forgot..." The professor turned to me with a sheepish [mareepish?] grin. "You wouldn't happen to have any liquid courage around, would you?"

"Liquid courage?" I frowned. "You mean alcohol?"

"Yes. I've been trying to cut down, you see; I'm researching ways to get ponies drunk without using the stuff, to prevent hangovers and blood poisoning incidents you know."

"I don't really drink myself, but I do keep some in the fridge--" I stopped as I opened the door on the refrigerator; there was a gaping hellmouth inside. I closed the door as I heard a chuckle, and I rolled my eyes.

"What's the password?" Asked the fridge.

"Tesla, you have 10 seconds to hand me the emergency booze before I revoke your cookie privilege for the next month."

The door immediately swung back open, and a brown glass bottle floated into my hands. "Actually it's 'swordfish', but you were close enough."

"Thank you," I said, handing the bottle to a bemused Frothing Stein. "By the way, it's good to see you; I'll have to introduce you after this potion is done."

"Potion's done!"

"And if you look to your left, you'll see our extensive collection of portraits. Yes, the eyes ARE following you."

Queen Banafrit looked with feigned interest as the Grand Duke's advisor led her through the mansion, both of them riding on the head knight like some sort of canoe. The portraits were nice, certainly, but the queen's mind was occupied by other matters.

Specifically, the Grand Duke.

It was obvious that he, like so many others, had become entranced by her beauty. But unlike the suitors she had turned down in life, Dante seemed to have a certain air about him. He was obviously from a different era, and only recently deceased; though his pokémon saw him as their master, Dante clearly saw them as his equals, and had a deep bond with each of them that could be formed only in life. His comforting of the Golurk had demonstrated his compassion, and the discovery of his odd 'castle' had shown that the fates favored him. He was knowledgeable, but not boastful; he was eccentric, but not insane.

And yet Queen Banafrit felt there was something missing, some vital part of himself that the Grand Duke had yet to find.

"And for our final stop on the tour" said the one called 'Lucius', "we take you to the kitchen, where all manner of delights and delicacies are prepared. While our full crew of master chefs is unfortunately incomplete, we should still be able to whip up a dish good enough to wake the dead!"

Any further comments were cut off by echoing, almost maniacal laughter from beyond the kitchen door.

"Stein, you're a GENIUS!"

Lucius rushed ahead into the room with interest, Durendal escorting the queen in behind him.

"Yo boss, what's the haps? D and I were just finishing the queen's tour."

"Excellent!" Dante was facing away from them as he spoke; there was a confidence in his voice that had not been there before. "I want her to see this."

The queen floated forwards. "What has happened, Grand Duke Dante?"

"Fairest Bunny, my queen," he began, still facing away from her, "when I first laid eyes upon you, I was still but a boy, too timid to chance my feelings upon beauty such as yours. But now... Now I have become a MAN; a KING!"

At this he spun around, and Banafrit saw his newfound confidence in full; he held himself more regally, and there was determination in his eyes. There was a proud grin on his face as he mimed placing his hands on his hips.

That was incrediy cheesy.

Frothing Stein shut up, since this was not his section.

Oops, sorry again!

Just forget it.

"What has prompted this change?" Asked the queen.

Dante's smile faltered. "Can't you see? It's obvious." He indicated his mask.

Queen Banafrit looked down at Dante's golden human face.

"You grew a moustache?"

Dante's confidence seemed to wither, and he shrank in on himself. "Well yeah I..." He looked down and made to twiddle his thumbs. "I always kinda really wanted a moustache..."

Lucius jumped in to stop the awkward silence. "I for one think it looks magnificent, boss."

"Quite," added Durendal, "very regal, Sire."

Banafrit started; the sword had just elbowed her in the side.

"O-Oh-- yes, of course, you look very handsome."

Dante smiled, a light blush on his cheeks, before looking up suddenly.

"That reminds me-- Lucius, come with me." The gengar melted into his shadows. "You two wait here," he said, rushing off, "I found another one of the team."

As the self-proclaimed now-king went to the back of the room, Banafrit whirled to face Durendal and glared the sword right in the eye.

"Allow me to inform you," she hissed, "what will happen if you ever touch me like that again."

Lucius and I returned with Tesla in tow, introducing him as our 'chief of technology'. Bunny looked delighted to meet him, but Durendal was shaking for some reason.

"Hey D," I asked, "is something wrong?"

He didn't look at me, staring straight ahead. "Please excuse me, Sire," he replied, floating through the door to the living room (or the 'unliving room' as I called it), "I need to go shine my shield." As he left, I heard him muttering something about a "rusted butter knife".

"What's his problem?" Wondered Lucius.

Bunny tilted her head and smiled. "I do not have the faintest idea,"

Author's Note

This marks the last chapter that I'd already written before submitting the story. I've read comments saying that I haven't properly introduced my characters, and that I haven't given enough time for readers to enjoy them; I'll try to make the rest of the story more fleshed out, and hopefully slow down the pacing.

Also, there is a perfectly good explanation for why the house is on equestria; I plan to tackle that sometime next chapter.

Ch 8: No Rest for the Wicked

Author's Note

Behold, the megachapter!

Here we learn a little bit more about some of the characters as they travel towards their first destination.

Ch 8: No Rest for the Wicked

Ghost Mansion

Unliving room

Mid-day

The meeting had been adjourned, and the group had split up to appreciate the downtime before they arrived at Hollow Shades. Frothing Stein had stayed behind at my request; I had proposed that both professors 'needed to get to know each other'. This quickly devolved into a back-and-forth of science jokes.

"And so I tell him 'if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate!'"

"Hah," I laughed, "that's a good one. But really though, I don't know almost anything about you; tell me a bit about yourself."

Frothing Stein leaned back in his seat, opening the soda pop I'd gotten him from the fridge. "Well if you insist," he started, "where should I begin?"

I hmmed in thought for a moment, settling on one of the more obvious questions. "Might as well start with that symbol on your backside; I noticed it when we met, but I kept forgetting to ask."

"Oh this?" He motioned to the picture of a foaming mug of what I could only assume was alcohol on his flank. "It's my cutie mark."

"Kooky whatnow?"

"Cutie mark. It shows what a pony's special talent is after they figure it out themselves; most ponies build careers off of their talent. Mine shows my proficiency with spirits, so to speak."

"So a picture just showed up on your rear end and told you you were good with beer? I thought you said you were a scientist."

Stein looked affronted. "I am a scientist," he said, sounding slightly incredulous, "I also said I was a brewmaster, which I am as well." He put his hooves on the table and leaned forward. "I run a beverage corporation to pay my bills, but my truest passion is in chemistry, alchemy, and all forms of brew-haha; the fine moustache on your face can a attest to my successes in those fields."

I held my mask closer, stroking the moustache on it almost on reflex. Stein took a gulp of his soda as I reflected on how I was instinctually making a habit of using my mask for comfort.

Flavor's a bit bland, but the carbonation is alright; still, it's no 'doctor fizz'.

What was that?

You know, doctor fizz? Basically the best soda ever, which I invented? Unless you're one of those 'hay cola' fanatics...

There it is again; some kind of voice coming from... I don't know where!

Oh goodness, this is a first-person perspective isn't it? Terribly sorry, please ignore me, I'll go away.

It sounds like... Professor Stein?

I looked over at the pony professor, who suddenly seemed very interested in the ceiling.

"So Dante," he said suddenly, breaking my train of thought, "why don't you tell me about your life-- erm, afterlife."

I decided it was probably just the stress getting to me; I concentrated on calming my nerves before speaking.

"Well I actually wasn't always a ghost."

"No!" Stein put both hooves to his mouth in mock disbelief.

"It's true; before I was brought to this planet, I was a human being."

"A whooman whatsman?"

"A human. There's a portrait on the back wall over there; I'm the pink one in the hat."

Stein turned to look. "I see. That's a nice lab coat you're wearing; looks fancy."

I grinned. "Yeah, well, we tended to get a lot of large research grants; I was basically the only scientist in the field of ghost-type studies."

"That explains the flying mansion. Was any of your work ever published?"

"Oh most certainly. In fact, it was only recently that I published a paper on proper care for ghost-types, and how to avoid having your soul stolen."

Stein blinked behind his goggles before lifting them up over his horn. "Stolen?"

"Oh yeah," I said, taking a sip of my own soda, "plenty of ghost-types are known for their tendencies to drain life force, lay curses, drag people to the underworld..." I trailed off as I noticed Stein staring. "Well I mean," I quickly backtracked, "it's only SOME ghost-types that do that, and those guys are jerks. My team is perfectly safe to be around."

It wasn't completely untrue; it'd been a whole 3 weeks since the last incident, and even then the guy only ended up with a couple of mental scars.

Stein relaxed, but only slightly. "Well you don't look like any of the other ghosts in that portrait," he said, nodding towards the back wall, "what's your deal?"

"I'm a yamask," I answered, holding up my mask. "Yamask as a species are, to my knowledge, composed entirely of humans who died and came back as ghosts. That's what the mask is for; it's my face from back when I was alive."

"And is it made of pure gold?" Stein looked at my mask, inquisitive. "I imagine that would be quite valuable in the wrong hooves."

I clutched my mask tighter. "Yeah, no," I growled, "yamask are usually very attached to their mask; temple raiding is one of the leading causes of easily preventable damnation where I'm from."

Stein put up both his front hooves in a 'calm down' gesture. "Just asking," he said, "I'm more curious on if it's made of real gold. From a scientific standpoint, you know."

I paused, then looked at my mask. "I don't know if it's gold or not," I pondered, "that's one of the things I was going to hopefully test after finding a yamask for my team; I guess I found one after all."

"Two if you count Boneyfruit-- er, Banafrit."

"Oh right, Bunny." My eyes wandered as I thought of that angel. "She's a beautiful soul; I wonder what Lucius wanted to talk to her about."

Master bedroom

Meanwhile

"And here," said Lucius as he led a curious Queen Banafrit through the door, "is the master bedroom. I'm showing it to you because I get a feeling you'll be spending some time here." Lucius turned to the queen with a wry smirk and a knowing wink. "If you know what I mean."

The queen crossed her arms and gave the shadow pokémon a small glare. "Watch your tongue, vizier; it is improper to speak to a queen in such ways."

Lucius dropped his grin, his eyes turning serious. "Yeah?" He narrowed his eyes, "I guess we won't waste any time on pleasantries then." There were audible clicks from around the room as the doors and windows seemed to lock by themselves all at once.

Lucius' smile returned, now cold and sinister. "On to business."

Suddenly, all light in the room disappeared, and the queen was left in total darkness. After only a moment, a spotlight turned on; squinting, the queen looked up to see it was shaped like a wide smile. She tried to shield her eyes, only to find both of herself sitting on a padded golden throne with restraints binding her hands to the armrests.

"What is this?" She murmured.

There was a cold steel table in front of her. A figure strode into the spotlight from out of the darkness; it was Lucius, wearing a grey fedora and tie while smoking a cigar and holding a crowbar.

"So'z youze is da dame da boss's got a 'ting for," he said, sneering down at her, "she don't look like much, Lucy."

Much to Banafrit's bewilderment, another Lucius shuffled in, wearing a smock and a surgical mask; both had unpleasant red stains that he absentmindedly brushed at while fiddling with a pair of pliers. "Nein, ze fräulein ist not zat impressive. Und put zat out, zis is a no shmoking room."

The first Lucius shrugged, rubbing his cigar into an ashtray on the table that the queen was sure she had not seen earlier.

"Now don't be so hard on the lass, boys," came a voice, and a third Lucius stepped into the light; this one was wearing a blue peaked cap with a yellow badge on it with a small pair of round glasses, and there was another badge on his torso. "She only just got here." The third Lucius turned to the queen, an expression of mock concern on his face. "Is the chair comfy enough, yer hoighness?" he asked, "I can get ye more pillows if you need 'em."

The queen's confusion died down, replaced with anger and disbelief. "What is this?" She demanded, attempting to phase out of the chair, "release me!"

"A'm afraid I can't do that, ma'm," spoke the third Lucius, "we've got some questions we'd like ye to answer first."

"You DARE--" she began, but was cut off when a crowbar smacked into the table.

"Yeah," spoke the first Lucius, "I darez; da boss seems to like youze a lot. And dat's all hunky-dory, but any new members uh da crew gotta go 'trough a little 'evaluation' foist."

"It's a fairly standard process, mind," the third ghost cut in, "we have to be sure that any new friends we make aren't liable to stab us in the back and warp us into an unending noightmare." The third Lucius floated closer. "We're just looking out fer the boss's best interest ye understand; all ye'll have to do is talk."

The second Lucius spoke up, catching the queen's attention. "Und glauben Sie mir, belief me, ve haff vays of making you talk, fräulein." He clapped the pliers shut menacingly.

The queen struggled against her restraints. "You think you can intimidate ME?" she yelled, "I am QUEEN BANAFRIT, I possess power far greater than anything you can--"

Smack

The queen flinched back; she'd been slapped across the face.

"Be silent," said the second Lucius. The queen looked at his hand; he was holding an empty glove. "Ah yes," the ghost said, "ein kleine buttermesser, a little butter knife, told us you don't like being touched."

"A dame like youze shouldn't be makin' threats like dat," said the first Lucius, reaching under the table, "it might make others wanna threaten youze back." He placed something on the table in front of the queen.

It was her mask.

"Such a pretty face," said the third Lucius, taking in the shock of fear in the queen's eyes, "if something were to happen to it… Well, I think we all don’t want that.”

The queen grit her ghostly teeth, determined not to show any weakness; she would not allow herself to be frightened by these insolent shades.

"What is it that you want?" She asked, clenching her fists.

The third Lucius smiled at her with feigned politeness. "It's like we said befoar, ma'm; we just have a few questions."

"Very well," Queen Banafrit growled, "I acquiesce to your pitiful interrogation."

The Lucius in the fedora growled back. "Who'z is youze callin' pitiful, you--"

"Enough," came a new voice, and there appeared yet another Lucius; he wore a brown deerstalker's hat with a monocle, and held a magnifying glass in his hand. "The good lady has agreed to questioning; we have no further need of such brutishness."

Frankly, if they did not have her so forcefully and inexplicably restrained, Queen Banafrit would have found the situation more ridiculous than intimidating.

The new Lucius turned to face the queen. "Let's begin," he said, examining her through the magnifying glass, "tell us about your past; who you were in life."

Forcing herself to unclench her fists, the queen composed herself before she began to answer. "I was - I am - Queen Banafrit, twenty-seventh ruler of the land that is today known as Unova."

Centuries in the past, on ancient earth...

A shining palace sat half-built upon a foundation of hard stone amidst a barren landscape. Inside, a beautiful young woman with dark, fair skin was being outfitted with the finest of royal silks and jewelry.

From birth, I was groomed to rule by my father, King Ptolemy.

Ptolemy? I know that name; surely you don't mean Ptolemy the war king?

The very same.

In the corner of the room stood a tall man wreathed in the garb of a pharaoh; his skin was tan and littered with scars, and his face was hard and unforgiving. In his hand he held a staff tipped with the blades of a slain haxorus, and his headress was the helmet of a samurott.

I've read that the ruthless war king carved a bloodied path through ancient Unova, conquering lands to add to his kingdom in a search for immortality.

He did indeed do such things; my father was as cruel and unforgiving as the desert sun.

A servant entered the room carrying a cup of wine. The servant was malnourished, face hollow and arms thin, and he stumbled as he entered, spilling the wine on the king's robe as he fell. The servant looked up from the ground, terrified, as the king glared down at him, raising his bladed staff.

He extended his wrath even to his own people.

The king wiped his staff blades on the former servant's garb. Around the young woman, the seamstresses stared and shook. At a glare from the king, however, they hurriedly returned to their task.

And what about you? What were you to your father?

I was the guaranteed continuation of his legacy; his heiress, his princess. I was his backup plan, and nothing more.

All though the ordeal, the young woman did not move, did not turn to look at her father or at the blood pooling on the floor; her expression lay flat, her eyes all but dead to the world.

Harsh.

He worked hard to teach me that compassion was weakness, and that all who opposed me were simply saying they wished to die. He taught me that servants were but insects, that pokémon were mere tools, and we were gods.

It was the next day; peasants in tattered robes were gathered before the palace as the king presented the young woman from a high balcony. Golurk and sigilyph stood guard, ensuring that no one tried to attack. Or escape.

My father also taught me the art of war.

Unbeknownst to the king, the young woman was scanning the guards, her face impassive as she visually checked each one; all of them were wearing a small piece of silk somewhere on their body.

I learned the ways of subterfuge.

She finished her scan, nodding ever so slightly as she slowly inched towards the railing.

I studied the complexities of a perfect ambush.

The golurk on the balcony behind the king suddenly slammed a fist into the ground without warning, causing an earthquake, while the sigilyph guards raised the peasants into the air with their powers to protect them from harm.

I became proficient in hand-to-hand combat.

The king became outraged as the palace shook, his footing unsteady as he whirled to face the guard. The young woman quickly swept the king's legs from beneath him, grabbing his staff.

I was told one must never turn their back on an enemy.

From the floor of the balcony, the king's face displayed his shock as the young woman raised the staff with both arms.

But the most important lesson was one I observed on my own.

She swung down.

One must never turn their back on an ally, either.

From the balcony fell a severed head, wearing a samurott's headress.

The fourth Lucius looked at the queen thoughtfully, rubbing his chin with the side of his magnifying glass. "'Those who live a cruel life shall find only a cruel death.'" he said, "A quote from an ancient Unovan philosopher, I believe."

Queen Banafrit sighed lunglessly. "It does not matter," she said, all earlier traces of her anger gone, "word of my father's death spread quickly, and the shift in the balance of power provided an opportunity for savages to invade our lands; my forces were overwhelmed and I was killed a month after my coronation." She closed her eyes tightly, holding back tears. "I was going to change my father's kingdom, and make the throne a position to be loved instead of feared," her hands curled into fists again, "but the people were all terrified of me; they thought I might become worse than my father ever was." She opened her eyes to look at her mask, and red tears broke loose from her eyes. "But they had been right to fear me. My father's teachings had taken hold in my mind, and even now I cannot stop myself from lashing out..."

A stubby purple hand was placed on the table beside the queen, and she looked up to see Lucius-- the real Lucius; the other four had disappeared.

"You've had a hard life" he said, looking saddened, "and an even harder afterlife." The restraints around the queen's wrists clanked open. "I can't blame you for being resentful; anyone would. You're welcome to stay with the boss."

Red eyes met red eyes as the queen looked up. "You are certain?"

"Absolutely. But first you have to promise me three things."

Queen Banafrit listened intently as he continued.

"First, you should talk to the boss about this; he'll want to help however he can. He won't hold it against you, he's an optimist like that."

The queed gave a silent nod.

"Second, you need to swear to me that you will not harm anyone on our team or treat them as inferior." The shadow's eyes turned hard for a moment as he said this. "The boss sees us all as equals, and he's just as protective as I am when he needs to be."

Another, more earnest nod. "And the third?"

"Third," said Lucius, and the room faded back to darkness as he spoke, "I need you to wake up."

Queen Banafrit woke with a start. Looking around, she realized she was still in the master bedroom, laying on the large canopy bed.

"You alright?"

The queen turned; Lucius was floating beside her as if nothing had happened.

"You must have been tired; you passed out on the bed right after I showed you in."

She blinked. Had it all been a dream? She felt for her mask; it was clutched safely in her tail.

"Yes," said the queen, "I am well." She floated up and off of the bed. "But if you will excuse me, I have matters I must discuss with Dante." She went to the door and made to turn the handle.

It was locked.

"Oh," came Lucius's voice from the other side of the room, "let me get that for you."

The door unlocked with a click.

The queen's eyes widened slightly, but her face was otherwise devoid of emotion. "Thank you, vizier."

"You're welcome, fräulein."

Storage

"Trick or treat!" Jack opened the door to the storage room and skipped joyfully inside, Ravid following behind him as the jack-o-lantern started rummaging through boxes

"Does he finds it? Ravid needs his precious..."

Jack looked up, still rifling through boxes of what looked like junk as he spoke.

"Ravles, pal, you know me; I can find anything! I'll find our spare items faster than you can say 'floccinaucinihilipilification'!"

Ravid frowned as he tried to parse what he'd just heard

"Flocksy- flossynock- flockynotchy-"

The sableye proceeded to stumble over the word for the better part of an hour before being interrupted by an exclamation of triumph.

"Found it!"

Jack popped up from inside one of the boxes. Ravid looked at him in anticipation.

"It finds the precious?!"

"Oh, that? I found that a while ago." Jack tossed over a small orb with a swirled design inside, which Ravid caught and held to his chest protectively. "No, I found the dictionary so I could look up that word!"

Ravid wasn't paying attention, clutching the odd stone like life itself.

"Ravid was worried, precious. But Ravid has you back now, and it won't ever let go..."

"Hey Ravles, you want these cool sunglasses too?"

"Yes, yes, gives it to us!"

Training arena

The training arena was a large room built in the basement of the complex.

How a flying castle could have a basement was beyond Durendal's understanding, but it wasn't his place to question the grand duke-- or the king, as Dante had finally accepted his place as true ruler over his small ghost kingdom. It even seemed the sovereign had found a worthy bride, even if the queen was a bit... Forceful.

Regardless, now was not the time for such matters; he was here to practice his technique with his greatest battle ally.

"Now Goliath," began the sword from his place in the giant's hand, "today we shall be practicing our 'skyward sword' maneuver; focus on properly using that shield, and I shall guide your movements for attack."

Goliath said nothing, simply nodding as he held up Durendal's shield in his other hand.

"Let's do this like Sire taught us; start with Fly."

Nodding again, Goliath withdrew his legs into his body before flames shot out from below his skirt like a rocket booster.

Speakers around the room activated as Tesla's voice rang out.

"Alright guys, I'm activating the training program."

Mechanical hisses and whirs sounded all around them as gun turrets and armed robots rose from the floor.

"Right then." Durendal's eye glinted in anticipation as Goliath brought up the shield.

"For the glory of the spirit king!"

Foal Mountain, near the peak

Biscuits' breath was heavy as he and Corporal tried to keep up with the balloon house. The problem wasn't that the house was going too fast, that wasn't it at all. The problem was that the dogs kept running into more angry creatures, forcing them to... delay their chase.

"Snow bom, boma snowbom abom!"

One such creature was a giant angry snowy tree.

Biscuits found new energy in his terror. "Run, Corporal!"

And as they ran, Corporal thought to himself that ghost hunting was a lot easier back on earth.

Ch 9: They Float

Above the forest just outside of Hollow Shades

A cloud of hoppip and skiploom floated lazily on the breeze, led by a single jumpluff. They had heard the announcement from Arceus that morning, but none of them were too concerned; this new world looked nice, and the cloud was usually fine with wherever the wind took them. The jumpluff leading the cloud was just thinking about how clean the air tasted compared to back on Earth when he spotted a flying type headed quickly away from what looked like a town. He squinted, trying to see clearly; it was bulbous and purple, with a cloud on the top and a yellow X over the mouth, and in its four ribbon-like appendages it held an odd baby ponyta-looking thing.

Looks like one of the locals has made friends with a drifblim, he thought, I should say hello.

"Hello there!" Jumpluff shouted, "pleasant weather we're having, isn't it?"

The other pokémon jumped a bit in midair as it heard the sudden greeting. It turned towards the cloud, and Jumpluff floated closer to it.

"Huh, wuzzat?" It spoke in a male voice, looking a little nervous as he seemed to try and hide the not-ponyta behind himself, "I don't know nuthin' about nuthin'!"

He must be shy, jumpluff thought. He adapted a placating tone and spoke again. "I was just asking what you thought of the weather."

The balloon-like pokémon blinked twice rapidly. “Oh, uh, sure, yeh,” he replied, trying not to look at jumpluff, “da weatha. ‘s great.”

“Yes indeed,” jumpluff called exuberantly, “I was just speaking with my fellows here about how fresh the air is! Could your friend there tell us how they keep it so clean?”

this drew another flinch from the drifblim. “Uhhh, yeh,” he stammered, and brought the young equine out from behind him, holding its head up with one of his appendages; the local creature looked almost asleep, with its mouth hanging open and its eyes glazed over.

“We use magic” the pony ‘said’ in a falsetto, though its mouth didn’t move and its eyes stayed unfocused, “yep, pure one-hundred-percent magic!”

Jumpluff paused a bit; something didn’t seem completely right about this… “Are you feeling okay?” he asked the pony, “You don’t really look like you should be going on flights--”

Wide-eyed, the drifblim suddenly pointed off into the distance, speaking hurriedly. “OH-HEY-WUSSAT-OVA-THERE-IZZAT-RAYQUAZA-GOTTA-GO-BYE!”

The drifblim and the pony zoomed off in the opposite direction of where he had pointed. Jumpluff stared after them, confused for a second, before turning around and seeing the hoppip-skiploom cloud floating away in the wind.

“Hey! Wait for me, guys!”

Jumpluff rushed towards his family-cloud, all thoughts of the drifblim forgotten.

SS Ghost Manor

Dirigible mode control room

(a.k.a. “the bridge”)

I sat in my captain’s chair, my head facing the large viewport at the front. In a chair beside me sat Bunny, both her hands gently grasping my arm, and I had my eyes closed as I listened to her.

“And that,” she spoke softly, "is the tale of my life, so many centuries ago." Her grasp on my arm tightened slightly. "I hope that you do not think less of me; I shall understand if you would prefer that I leave."

I opened my eyes and turned towards Bunny, placing my free hand on her arm as I gazed into her eyes.

"Fairest queen," I said, "my dearest of dears, I could never think less of you." Her eyes widened as I moved to caress her face with the back of my hand. "No darkened past could tear me from your side," I continued, "you have a caring heart deep inside you, this much I could tell from when we first met. I am no stranger to the darkness; if you will permit me, I will help you find your caring heart and bring it to the light once more."

Bunny's eyes glistened as she brought her face closer to mine. "My king," she whispered, and our mouths were only inches apart...

"Oh this is just too much; get a room, you two!"

We snapped apart and whirled to face the new voice; Teala was floating in front of us wearing a devious smile. Bunny stuttered out an excuse before rushing from the bridge.

I slammed a ghostly fist on the armrest of my captain's chair. "Arceus DANGIT, Tesla," I shouted, jabbing an accusatory finger at the tech ghost, "you had better have a GOOD REASON for interrupting!"

Tesla snapped a plasma appendage up in a salute. "We've spotted an anomaly hard to starboard, mein kapitän."

My eyebrows (or whatever ghosts had for eyebrows) furrowed. "Very well," I replied, "down periscope."

A periscope descended from the ceiling; I peered into it, though my newly-shaped head made it a little difficult. Off in the distance, I could see some kind of purple bulb carrying a bundle of black. The shape became clearer as I zoomed in, revealing it to be a drifblim. One that I recognized. He was carrying... A small pony?

"Up periscope," I commanded; I had seen enough to know what to do. "Engineer Tesla, send out the aerial retrieval unit."

The plasma spark nodded, saying "I'll tell Goliath to deploy," before speeding off through the walls.

I sighed and leaned back in my chair. "He'd better have a good explanation for this..."

Aerial unit deployment hangar

(The garage)

This was clearly a serious matter, Frothing Stein could tell; King-Captain-Professor Amaranth had come in wearing what he'd called his "captaining hat" with a firm expression on his face as he held his mask in one arm to stroke his moustache.

That ghost really likes his moustache. He has every right to, of course; its magnificence rivals that of even my own.

Unconsciously, Stein put a hoof to his muzzle to stroke his own moustache, which was admittedly rather magnificent.

Oh by the way, this is a third-person perspective section focused on me, right?

The narrative replied in the affirmative.

Good, good; I don't want a mix-up like that to happen again.

Stein was distracted from his thoughts of the fourth wall as the door to the hangar--

It really looks more like a garage; there's a horseless carriage and everything.

As the mansion was floating in the sky at the moment, the room Stein was in was referred to as the hangar.

Alright alright, sheesh. Narratives nowadays, with their sky-boat-houses...

The hangar door opened and Goliath flew in, dragging a purple balloon-looking thing behind him by what looked like a cloud attached to the top.

"Ow ow ow ow," said the balloon as Goliath released it and the hangar door closed, "yo watch the hair uncle G, I gotta keep up my style!"

Rubbing its 'hair,' the odd creature flinched when it took notice of Dante. "He-hey, pops," it said, and Frothing Stein noticed it held something behind its back, "fancy meetin' you here; ya finally got dat moustache I see--"

The captain-king held up a hand to interrupt. "Avira. What's behind your back, young man?"

The balloon, Avira, cringed and seemed to swell with air to obscure what he was holding. "I don't got nuthin' behind my back..."

Dante's eyes narrowed. "Avira" he growled.

"Okay, jeez," Avira relented, and he shrank back down as he set the object on the ground.

It was a young bat-pony filly, with a dark grey coat and a jet black mane complimenting her small, leathery wings. Frothing stein noted that she was, at least, breathing.

Dante glared at Avira, crossing his arms. "Avira Montgolfier Amaranth, what have I told you about this?"

The balloon deflated further, looking at the floor in shame. "Stealing is bad," he said, as if reciting from memory, "but stealing children is worse."

"That's right," Dante scolded, wagging an ethereal finger at the quickly deflating air creature, "now we're going right back to where you found this one and returning it."

"But pops," Avira protested, "little sis already got da soul--"

"She WHAT?!" The mask spirit looked positively livid. "Where is your sister, Avira?!"

Avira put up a nervous ribbon-like appendage as he gave a meek reply. "Well, eheh," he chuckled timidly, "dat's actually a funny story; see sis and I woke up in da forest down dere," the balloon gestured to the forest through the hangar door, "an' we thought 'hey, we must 'a got lost again, let's try ta find pops,' so we looked around all night an' we couldn't find ya, an' I was like 'we ain't findin' nuthin' like dis' an' den we found a town an' dat message from dat Arceus dude happened an' we're like 'oh man, a new planet, dat's cool' an' dis little horsey thing comes up to us an' sis goes like 'hey, can I have your soul?' And da little horsey thing's like 'yeah, I ain't usin' it' an' when sis got done I figured it wadn't usin' its body no more so it ain't really stealin' is it, an' den dis big angry lookin' horsey thing comes up an' starts yellin' an' grabs sis so I'm like 'ah crehp' an' I take da kid an' bail an' I was totally gonna give it back I swear!"

Stein looked back at Dante, and saw that his face had become calm. Too calm.

"So you mean to tell me," he said, his voice unnaturally level, "that your sister, after consuming this young pony's soul," he indicated the comatose filly on the floor, "was captured by one of the adult locals, and in response you just took the body and ran?"

"...yes?" Avira squeaked, fiddling with the ends of his ribbons.

"Well alright; I just wanted to be clear on that." Dante turned and addressed his shadow. "Lucius, prepare a retrieval squad and a search team; we'll need to find Thanos." His shadow gave him a salute before rushing back inside the mansion.

All at once, Avira seemed to re-inflate to what Frothing Stein assumed was normal size. "You're not mad?"

Dante turned back around, showing a smile that made Stein feel uncomfortable. "Oh I'm plenty mad; I just know that sitting here yelling won't get anything done. Besides, your punishment will have to wait until after we find Alastor."

The masked ghost floated towards the door, gesturing for Stein to follow, as Avira visibly paled.

"Freaky uncle Al? Y-you're kiddin' me, right? Right? Pops?"

The two professors went back into the mansion without another word.

I sighed as I went back to the bridge, Frothing Stein following behind me.

"You probably have a lot of questions," I said as I sank back into the captain's chair, "please, don't hesitate to ask."

The other professor looked wary as he tried his best to sit in one of the other chairs.

"Well," he began, "before we start, I have to ask; is this still third person or is that section over?"

"What?" I had no idea what he was talking about.

"Actually never mind," he replied quickly, "that's a silly question." Stein switched topics, leaving me no time to think about his words. "This 'Avira' fellow; I assume he's part of your team?"

"Yes," I answered, "he's our second youngest member. He's sort of my adopted son; I took him in when he was just an egg, and raised him from when he was a little drifloon."

"But then..." Stein tilted his head, confused. "How does a ghost hatch from an egg?"

"That's actually a good question," I shrugged, feeling myself relax as I talked about my research, "the process by which pokémon eggs even appear is somewhat of a mystery; nobody's ever actually seen a pokémon lay an egg. Ghost-types in particular are strange in that most of them aren't truly 'alive' at all; they're composed of spiritual energy that sometimes takes on properties of different materials. But then certain species, like yamask or golurk, are not 'born' to begin with; yamask like myself are the souls of dead humans, as I said before, and golurk like Goliath were created centuries ago through a process long since lost to history."

"That sounds complicated," Stein commented.

"There's more; yamask and golett, along with all other ghost-types with recorded origins, can also hatch from eggs. This raises several questions: what happens when an egg comes into existence? Does a human die every time a yamask is born? If ghost-types don't die, how do they stop from overpopulating and turning the planet into a veritable underworld-on-earth? These are the kind of questions I had in mind when I began my research."

"All of them excellent questions, I must say," my fellow scientist interjected.

"Yes, but I never found answers to them. There were practical setbacks, like not having a yamask on my research team, as well as moral hang ups - I would never try to kill a sentient being, even if they weren't alive to begin with."

"And of course you couldn't just spy on a pair of pokémon to see if one of them laid an egg."

"Of course not, that'd be terribly rude. That and other scientists have tried already; an egg would appear out of nowhere in the time it took the observer to blink, and recording equipment would either malfunction or go missing entirely. Not even the pokémon themselves had any idea what happened!"

"Fascinating." Stein considered this a moment. "Oh, but I think we're getting sidetracked; does your 'son' tend to kidnap children often?"

I sighed, briefly reflecting that I didn't actually have lungs to sigh with. "It's an unfortunate inborn instinct for all drifloon that carries over when they evolve. You know about evolution, right?"

"I do, yes; Queen Bambifroth--"

"Banafrit"

"--she explained it briefly to me when we first met."

"Right, well drifloon and drifblim are known for kidnapping the young and taking them to the underworld. I've been trying to get them all to stop for at least a year now, but the best I've done is convince a few groups to bring the kids back when they're done. The children seemed not to mind at least, if they remembered the experience at all."

"Well it's something at least," Stein looked wary, but not quite as frightened as any of the distraught parents I'd explained this to. "And he mentioned a sister? Another draft-balloon?"

"Actually," I replied, "chandler is a chandelure; Avira only calls her 'little sis' because she's the other pokémon I hatched from an egg. She's the youngest on our team, and she's honestly a bit of a handful."

"Because she eats souls."

"Oh no, no, not at all. She burns them for fuel."

Stein made a 'mhmmm' sort of noise. "And tell me again how safe your team is?"

"Well I mean she doesn't burn the whole thing," I amended, "just the part that knows the way to the afterlife. In my experience, this has been a good help; my team just had to find the spirit she took and put it back in the empty body."

"Because of course you can do that." Stein deadpanned.

"Well technically," I corrected, "I personally can't do that. That's what the search party is for; to find a certain member of my team as fast as possible."

"But this teammate of yours," Stein pointed out, "could be anywhere on the whole planet."

I shrugged. "He's close," I said, gazing at the ceiling as I tapped my 3 fingers on the armrest of my chair, "I just know he is; no loving god with any kind of forethought or wisdom would put Thanos and Chandler too far apart."

Far away, Arceus blinked; he had the oddest feeling he'd just been unintentionally insulted.

Author's Note

Oh those wacky ghost-types and their soul-stealing, child-abducting, fear-mongering ways.

By the way: if it seems like the romance between Dante and Banafrit is being rushed, that's because it kind of is. This is a romance between two ghosts, both of whom are not entirely of sound mind, on an unfamiliar planet full of strange creatures and magic. It's not supposed to be normal.

(For anyone wondering, Avira is speaking with a Boston, NY kind of accent.)
(And yes, him calling Dante "pops" is a pun)

Ch 10: Trial By Fire

Jack the gourgeist had always been good at finding value in things. Where some saw a boring rock, Jack saw a heart scale wrapped in stone like a present. When a beginning trainer carelessly tossed a used potion container aside, Jack would take it and find it still half-full. While some would pass up a rotten apple core, Jack would see it as a perfectly good waste of leftovers. But more than that, Jack was good at finding things in general. He'd found a great pal in Dan buddy. He'd found companies willing to fund his trainer's research. He'd even stumbled upon their house after being transported to another world entirely! Life was one big Halloween, and Jack had a bag to fill up with rare candies.

Most people would think he's the 'mon to see about lost items, and first pick to lead any search party.

"Ooh, look, a leaf!"

Most people don't know Jack.

"Sir Jack, please," said Durendal, placing a ribboned hand on a hair-like shoulder, "you must focus; we're out here looking for Sir Thanos at the request of our king."

The large pumpkin-like pokémon looked up and turned around as the rest of the small group caught up; the group consisted of Jack, Durendal, Ravid and Goliath.

"But the leaf--"

"We're in a forest, there are leaves everywhere!"

Jack was very easily distracted, and would take notice of every little thing that caught his eye; for every valuable item the scavenger found, he'd have picked up a dozen amusing (but ultimately useless) novelties. That was one of the main reasons he needed a group to accompany him on all searches: to keep him on task.

"Fine," said Jack, pouting at the sword, "but this is the most boring search party I've ever been to."

Another reason was that Jack took the phrase "search party" too literally.

Ravid spoke up from his position on Goliath's shoulder. "Does pumpkin finds its friend? Ravid wants to go home and eats."

Goliath just stood there silently.

"He found me half an hour ago," a new voice rang out from the shadows.
The group turned around to see a dusknoir, Thanos, creeping out from behind a tree.

Durendal sputtered as he took in his comerade's sudden appearance. "But-but-but-- why?!"

Thanos shrugged. "I didn't want to spoil the party."

The most annoying reason Jack needed to be accompanied was that he would always try to keep the party going.

Durendal groaned, he looked about ready to slice his own arms off. "Let's just go."

Jack sighed in resignation. "I guess it's time to end the party."

The gourgeist hopped up on Goliath's unoccupied shoulder as Thanos and Durendal both grabbed hold of the giant's arms, and they took off into the sky.

"I still say that leaf was really cool."

"Shut UP, Sir Jack."

Frothing Stein, Lucius, Avira and I stepped and/or floated into the town, Avira carrying the comatose young pony as we went.

"Are you certain the four of us are all we need for this?" Stein asked, turning to me with a questioning gaze, "I feel like we should have at least asked Bangarang to come with us."

"Banafrit," I corrected absently without looking at him, "and I think she needs some time alone right now."

"Besides," added Lucius, concealed in my shadow, "we're trying to give off a non-hostile presence; having a larger group would only make us seem more threatening, and that could cause things to escalate."

Stein said nothing for a moment, perhaps nodding before remembering I wasn't looking at him. "Of course," he replied as we ambled through the town gate, "that would be unfortunate for us."

"More unfortunate for them, actually." Lucius flashed a quick smile to the professor from my shadow.

Avira decided to chime in at that moment. "Hey so, ah, if we're tryin' ta look un-threatenin', maybe I should go back to the house?"

I gave him a stern glare, and he timidly scratched at his cloud.

"Aright, okay, just askin'."

Our progress into the town was suddenly impeded by a pair of spears held in an X in front of us. I noted that they weren't being held by guards, but coated in a midnight blue aura.

"Hold it right there!"

I turned to look at the voice who had just spoken; a pony clad in dark armor was trotting towards us, wearing a displeased look. From the voice and body structure, I guessed this pony was a she.

"I am Iron Bar, head of the town guard," she proclaimed, "surrender the filly and come quietly, you're under arrest!"

I was unperturbed by the pony's command; that had been about what I'd expected to hear once we entered the town.

"Law enforcement, very good," I called, doffing my top hat to the mare, "I was quite hoping to find you." I turned, intending to go around the spears, but I suddenly found them both pointed directly at me.

"I don't think you heard me," said the mare, azure eyes glaring at me from beneath her helmet, "surrender my daughter, you are under arrest!"

Well, that complicated things slightly.

I raised both my hands in a calming gesture. "Easy now," I spoke calmly, "we're here not here to make trouble; your daughter is fine."

I motioned to Avira, who gently placed the young bat-winged pegasus on the ground; her eyes had been closed, and she looked all but asleep to anyone who was watching. The armored mare, Iron Bar, rushed over, though her psychic kept the spears pointed right at my head.

It's magic, actually. Unicorns can levitate things with magic.

Now was NOT the time to start hallucinating Frothing Stein's voice in my head again.

Oh blast it all, I've done it again. So sorry, just ignore me, I'll be quiet-- now where did I put that...

I was once again interrupted from my thoughts as Iron Bar spoke, gently but worriedly shaking the young pony on the ground.

"Moony? Moony are you okay?"

“I wouldn’t do that, miss,” I said from my place behind the spears, and flinched slightly when the mare turned her head to glare at me. “That is to say,” I amended hurriedly, “your daughter was out playing with my son, Avira,” I motioned to Avira, “it was quite tiring, I’d imagine, and she probably needs to rest.”

Having the head of the town guard learn that her daughter’s soul was missing was pretty much the LAST thing I wanted to happen. Besides, it technically wasn’t a lie; having one’s soul extracted, even temporarily, is a bit of an ordeal.

“While we’re on the subject of children,” I continued, “I understand my daughter was here as well? I want to make sure she’s alright; she has a habit of borrowing things and forgetting to return them.”

Iron Bar’s eyes narrowed at me as she slowly lowered her spears. I could tell she wasn’t totally convinced, but was willing to hear me out because of Arceus’ message this morning.

“I’m not totally convinced,” she said, placing the filly on her back with her magic, “but I’m willing to hear you out because of that Arceus guy’s message this morning.”

"Wonderful!" I clapped my hands together. The sound reverberated oddly, as if there were something wrong with the air, but I paid it no mind. "Her name is Chandler; she's sort of round and purple-white, but also on fire."

The guardsmare raised an eyebrow, and seemed to relax somehow. "Sort of looks like a chandelier?"

"Yes, that's her," I nodded; this was going much more smoothly than I'd expected. "Can you take us to her? I believe she'll help your daughter, ah... 'rest up' a little faster."

Iron Bar narrowed her eyes again, scowling slightly. "Your daughter's back at the station," she said, jabbing a hoof in Avira's direction, "I saw her with this one earlier when he took off with Moony; I tend to make arrests when I think ponies' lives are at risk, especially my daughter."

"Oh I understand completely," I nodded again, and I dimly noted that the light foggy mist that seemed to surround our group. "I get the same way sometimes. To the station, then?"

Nodding, Iron Bar wordlessly turned and began trotting off, levitating 'moony' onto her back as she went. As my group moved do follow her, I noted the foggy mist following the guardsmare.

"That actually went a lot better than I expected," I mused aloud, keeping pace next to Frothing Stein as I motioned to the group, "and all of you were awfully quiet throughout."

"That was my doing, actually," Stein said, speaking for the first time since the confrontation started. He brought an empty vial into view with his purple aura, and looked at me in a way that was both timid and sly. "I confess that I wasn't completely confident in your diplomatic skills, especially after that first encounter with Bungee Flip--"

"Banafrit."

"--so I took the liberty of dispersing a little calming mist to stop things from getting violent." Stein shook the empty vial slightly and waggled his moustache with a grin. "I always keep a supply on hand just in case. It makes ponies a little more agreeable, if just a touch gullible, and removes some inhibitions; it's much more potent if you drink it."

I hmmed as I looked at the vial. "So it's basically alcohol."

Stein huffed and shook his head. "I suppose you could get drunk off of it, but this is a completely alcohol-free solution, with none of the negative effects like hangovers or blood... poisoning..."

The professor stopped his trot, staring intently at the vial held in his magic, and I could almost see the gears in his head turning.

"By Jove," he suddenly shouted, leaping into the air, "I've DONE IT! I've created a completely organic and easy-to-produce alcohol substitute!"

I rolled my eyes and tugged at Avira's hand, continuing on to the guard station as the chartreuse stallion began dancing with glee; there'd be no point in waiting up for him, and I needed to see Chandler ASAP.

"So why were you so quiet?" I asked to the seemingly empty air, and was unsurprised when Lucius whispered to me from the shadows.

"I saw Stein releasing that vapor," he murmured, "and I started filtering the air around us in case he was trying to poison you without you knowing."

I sighed. "Must you be so distrustful of everyone we meet?"

His response was quiet, but resolute. "It's saved your life more times than you'd know, boss."

Hollow Shades Guard Station

Holding cells

Chandler was annoyed.

It wasn't that Arceus had transported her and her brother (and hopefully the rest of her family) to another planet; that was actually kind of cool. It wasn't that she and said brother had wandered around in a forest for a whole day where they could be attacked by any number of angry dark types; Chandler reveled in the fight a ticked-off sharpedo could offer, and her brother was strong enough to take on almost anything after she set him on fire a little. It wasn't even that she was trapped in a cold, dark cell in a strange town full of alien ponyta; she could phase through the walls just as easily as she could burn the whole building down. No, Chandler was annoyed because she was in time out - and she definitely knew a time out when she saw it - but she didn't know what she did wrong!

Sure, she’d taken someone’s soul, but she was sooo hungry and she’d asked really nicely and the pony gave her permission!

Chandler looked at the wisp that was the pony’s soul as it twirled around in midair next to her. The ghost/fire-type had even been careful not to hurt the pony too much as she ate, and dad had told her that the soul-burning left more of a numb feeling than any actual pain.

“Dad…” Chandler sighed, her ethereal flames dimming at the thought. Was the ghostly professor even on this planet? Would Avira be able to find him?

The haunted lighting fixture shook her head-body to clear those thoughts away. Her dad WAS here, Avira WOULD find them, and they’d get this whole mess sorted out. And then uncle Thanos would put the soul back in the pony.

Uncle Thanos...

"I forgot about uncle Thanos!" Chandler cried suddenly, startling the wisp as it twirled about in the air, "Dad's going to be so mad..."

"I've been mad for an hour and a half now," came a voice from outside the cell, "right now I'm more relieved that you're alright."

Looking up, Chandler instantly recognized the golden face of her father clasped in the hands of a yamask.

The fire/ghost type launched herself up, passing through the bars of the cell like they weren't even there as she wrapped the yamask in a hug.

"Daddy!"

Thanos grumbled to himself and flicked the yellow antenna on top of his head as he hovered towards the center of the small pony town, the search party following behind them.

"Confounded antenna, why is there so much interference?"

Ever since the reaper had awoken on this planet, there had been a constant buzzing in his head where he would normally have received orders from the spirit world. The noise had started off quiet enough, allowing Thanos to detect his scattered comerades and head towards the closest signal, but it had grown unbearable earlier that morning, right after the message from Arceus; if Jack hadn't found him, Thanos would likely have wandered in the forest for ages, another lost spirit. Thanos shuddered at the thought; he hated irony, and a spirit guide being lost was certainly ironic.

After a time, Thanos managed to direct the group to Dante's location, where a familiar chandelure was conversing with a yamask. Jack bounced over to them excitedly.

"Hey, Dan," called the pumpkin, "Dan buddy! Look what I found!"

The yamask turned, and Thanos wasn't surprised at the mask it held.

"Jack," said Dante, raising a hand in welcome, "you found Thanos, I see."

Jack stopped in front of the former human and turned around, an absent look on his face. "Huh? Oh yeah, I found him too, but look at THIS!" The gourgeist pulled an object from behind himself. "This leaf is so cool, am I right?!"

Thanos more felt than heard the resounding clang as Durendal hit his head with the back of his shield.

Dante looked rather amused. "Yeah," he replied, examining the loose scrap of foliage, "it is a pretty cool leaf; we can put it with the rest of your stuff later."

"Yay!"

"Excuse me," interrupted a new voice, and all attention shifted to a unicorn mare clad in black metal armor. "You know these... Individuals?"

"Oh, right," Dante moved towards the mare, gesturing towards us. "These are colleagues of mine, here to help your daughter." He turned back towards us. "Gentlemen, this is Iron Bar, head of the guard in this town." He gestured towards the mare, and then indicated the smaller pony laying on her back. "Her daughter Moonbreeze had an... eventful evening with Avira and Chandler, and I had you find Thanos so he could help her, eh, 'wake up'."

Thanos didn't need to hear the shifty tone Dante spoke in to know what happened. The large ghost sighed; even on another planet, a reaper's work is never done. Still, the situation seemed to be well in hand, and the group would probably be back at the mansion in time for him to do a little reading.

"Stop right there, undead scum!"

Or not, Thanos reflected, as an angry-looking stoutland charged towards them.

"I hate irony..."

Author's Note

As a scientist studying the arcane and macabre nature of ghost-type pokémon, Dante has had personal experience with soul-burning.

Coming up next chapter: our first fight scene!

Ch 11: Who Let the Dogs Out?

Corporal bared his fangs as he skidded to a halt near the horrid ghouls, his new trusted companion catching up soon after.

"Corporal," panted Biscuits, the 'diamond dog' out of breath from running, "did you find them?"

The stoutland gave his teammate a determined look as he raised a paw to point at the gathering of ghastly ghosts.

Biscuits went pale as he looked over, giving a "yipe!" as he hid behind Corporal. Corporal didn't blame the pup; Biscuits was a resident of this new non-pokémon world, and couldn't possibly have been prepared to face such insidious odds. Were it not for the inexplicable language barrier, Corporal would have barked some words of encouragement at the lad.

As it happened, there was no language barrier between the stoutland and the fiends in front of him.

"I have you now, villains," he shouted, "you will not be taking any more souls today!"

A yamask, who Corporal assumed was the mastermind of the evil operation, seemed utterly unpreturbed as it replied.

"Ah, I'm terribly sorry," the yamask called, speaking in a way that denoted male gender, "but I think there's been a misunderstanding; we are but simple scientists."

"Ha," Corporal barked back, "your ghost lies won't work on me, you cretins!"

A green rapidash-like creature, most likely a native of the planet, popped up next to the yamask suddenly.

"Ohh, some croutons would be nice right now; a lovely salad, maybe some garlic vinegrette dressing..."

"Stein," said the yamask, turning towards the local, "three things; first, he said cretin, it was an insult. Second, when did you get here? Third, how can you understand that stoutland?"

'Stein' looked at the yamask and tapped his horn, which was glowing a faint purple. "I only got here just now, and I've been projecting a translation aura so I could ask for directions from whoever or whatever I encountered."

So the ghosts had overpowered and enslaved a local psychic, had they? Those monsters!

"You monsters," Corporal growled, "overpowering a local psychic-type and forcing him to do your bidding!" The stoutland indicated the golurk off behind the group holding a young winged native. "No doubt you've brainwashed that poor golurk to think it's one of you while you tried to consume that youngling's soul!"

Corporal had seen it dozens of times; golurk, protectors of the innocent, who had been warped into thinking they were ghost-types! The mere thought was simply absurd!

"Actually I'm a unicorn," the psychic interjected.

"What's this about soul consuming?!" Another rapidash-like local, black in color with dark metal armor, forced her way to the front if the group to glare at the yamask. "What did you do to my daughter?!"

The yamask put up its hands as it turned towards the armored unicorn. "Iron Bar!" He said, cringing, "I assure you there's a perfectly good explaination--" the yamask's hands started moving in circles as his shadow began to undulate. "You are getting sleepy... Very sleepy..."

Multicolored rings moved from the shadow to the unicorn, whose eyes drooped before closing completely as she fell asleep standing up.

"Quick thinking, boss," said the shadow, before a gengar rose from the darkness, "that was about to get a whole lot worse."

"Enough!" Corporal howled, "I am Corporal, a warrior of all that is good in this or any world; I'm here to see that you spectral scoundrels pay for driving young Biscuits from his home and for terrorizing this peaceful town!"

The green unicorn blinked and turned to the yamask. "Do you have any idea what he's talking about?"

"I think I do," the gengar interjected, before affixing Corporal with a harsh look, "You're a ghost hunter, aren't you?"

Scenes flashed through Lucius' mind as he recalled his 'life' back on Earth.

A young gastly fleeing from a graveyard, frightened and confused as grey-robed humans chased him.
"Out, foul demon! Begone with thee!"

A young girl, screaming at the gastly as a mightyena snapped its jaws.
"Daddy, make the scary thing go away!"

An abandoned house, rotten and broken down, where a banette held a hand out to the gastly.
"It's alright, friend; I, too, have been wronged by humans."

A banette standing tall over a trembling little girl, ignoring the pleas of the gastly that floated between them.
"Please, there's got to be another way!"
"There is no other way! Now stand aside, this girl will get what she deserves for casting me aside like worthless garbage!"

A path, flat and worn, where a gastly stared at a distant town as it burned.
"This isn't right– this isn't how ghosts are meant to exist..."

A boy, scruffy-haired and oddly dressed, smiling up at the gastly.
"I'm Dante, and I'm your new trainer!"

A haunter, quaking in fear behind his trainer as a grey-robed man shouted at them.
"I'm trying to help you, boy; that THING is a soul-eating abomination! Now step aside!"
"SHUT UP!"

A young man, panting as he stares down at a battered, beaten man wearing a grey robe specked with his own blood.
"You tell your freaky cult to stay away from my family!"

A haunter, shaking with tears as his trainer tries to hug his gaseous body.
"I'll never let them hurt you. Never. And that's because...

You're my best friend, Lucius."

"You know of my righteous mission, then," the stoutland, Corporal, replied, bearing his fangs in a grin, "that means you should know there's no escape; I am here to see you and your cadaverous cohorts are banished back into the ether for your heinous existence!"

I grit my teeth, glaring at the canine as I restrained myself from lunging at him.

"I thought we took down your freaky purist cult back on Earth," I said.

The stoutland gives a derisive HMPH! "Indeed, the Brotherhood of Nature's Order was disbanded years ago, but I heard tell of their virtuous ways when I was but a lillipup, and I took their holy quest upon myself!"

I clenched a fist at my side. "Virtuous?!" I shouted, "they practically declared war on all ghost-types! They were a bunch of lunatics who thought the voices in their heads was the word of Arceus!"

"Stop your lies and be silent, fiend!" Corporal shouts back, "I am here to carry out my duty as a protector of all life! This world will surely thank me. You should not be here; you ghosts no doubt slipped through to this world with Giratina, that wretched, traitorous son of Arceus!"

He was seriously getting on my nerves.

"Or," I shouted, "maybe Arceus brought us all here on his own because a ghost-type is just as much of a pokémon as any other type and your 'mission' is just frigging crazy!"

"How DARE you!" The stoutland rushed at me, his fangs growing longer as they radiated a dark aura. "CRUNCH!"

Just before the attack could reach me, the a pair of clawed purple hands reached out and grabbed the canine by his jaws.

"Master does not like you," said Ravid, as his opponent struggled to escape his grasp, "Ravid does not like you either."

"Thank you, Ravid," I said, floating up and looking the stoutland straight in the eyes. "You don't want to be my enemy, Corporal. I am Professor Dante Amaranth, and I've had enough of dealing with typist lunatics like you to last me an eternity." I backed away, glaring, as the stoutland glared back. "Ravid, use seismic toss."

The sableye began to spin rapidly in place, effortlessly swinging the large weight around, before throwing the stoutland off into the sky.

"Corporal!" The young diamond dog ran into the forest, chasing after the trajectory of his comerade.

"Welp," I clapped my hands together, turning back toward the others, "back to business; we have a soul to implant!"

Author's Note

I finally got the chapter done! And just in time for Halloween!

It's November.

Just in time for Day of the Dead!

That was almost 3 weeks ago.

HOW ABOUT JUST IN TIME FOR STEIN TO SHUT UP THEN.

(and I know I promised a fight scene, but I never promised that it would be a long one.)

Ch 12: Wood you kindly?

Frothing Stein furrowed his brows as he looked back at the town, watching the little bat-pony, Moonbreeze, wave goodbye at the group's retreating forms from her seat atop the still-sleeping Iron Bar as Stein followed the ghosts back to the mansion.

"Are you sure it's alright to just leave like this?"

Dante, floating next to Stein at the front of the group, shrugged.

"The girl- or, filly I guess- will be fine now that her soul's been put back, and that Iron Bar mare will wake up sooner or later; hypnosis only lasts about 3 to 5 turns."

"Three whatnow?"

"Three to five hours." Dante glanced at Stein, an eyebrow raised. "By the way, what was with that pony's wings?"

"She's a bat-pony," Stein replied, turning to face forward, "it's a type of pegasus pony with leathery wings."

"Is that just... a thing now?"

Stein shrugged, levitating his hat off to fiddle with the brim. "I don't actually know the specifics, but basically yes, they're a thing."

Plus the author couldn't be bothered to look it up.

Stein was then bonked on the head by a pine cone.

Ow! There aren't even any pine trees in this forest!

Stein was then bonked on the head a second time by a particularly large acorn.

OW! What the heck, man?!

Stein was then bonked on the head by a pair of cherries

Ow.

Half a dozen pink eggs

Ow- wait, what?

And a spiked metal seed-egg-thing

Okay now you're just being silly.

You didn't say "ow."

I believe "ow" is already implied by this point.

Stein looked up at the canopy, frowning. "Alright," he said, shaking a hoof in the air, "who's the wise guy dropping seemingly random objects on my head?"

"Cherubi!"

"Hmm?" Looking down, Stein saw that the pair of cherries that hit him had a face- two faces, in fact.

"Dan, buddy, look!" Jack hopped to the front of the group to point at the rather large fruit. "Forest pokémon!"

"So they are," said Dante, smiling down at the large acorn, "what an odd collection."

Glancing around, Stein saw that all of the 'objects' had faces, and were moving around.

"Cherubi!" said the cherry-like creature, "Cherub rubi cher!"

"I don't-" the unicorn started, before jumping slightly in realization. "Oh, the translation spell must've worn off." Stein's horn glowed slightly again before he looked down at the small pokémon. "You were saying?"

"I said 'You were in the way of our parachuting practice,'" was the reply. "I'm Cherubi, by the way." Cherubi gestured toward the other, smaller cherry. "This is my second head!"

"I'm full of nutrients," said the second head, "but you can't have any."

Stein blinked behind his goggles. "...Charming. And the rest are?"

"I'm Seedot," said the acorn.

"Pineco," said the pine cone.

"Ferroseed," said the metal spiky thing, "sorry for any concussions or lacerations you might have."

Stein waved a hood. "I've had worse; I'm more worried about these eggs."

"We are Exeggcute," the eggs replied in unison. "It takes more than that to harm us."

"But some of you have cracks..."

"Those are natural; we hatched with these cracks."

"An egg hatched from an egg?" Stein was getting a little confused.

"Actually," Dante interjected, floating over, "six eggs hatched from the same egg."

Stein blinked again. "... I'm not going to ask."

"Good," the yamask replied, "because I don't know either. Not my field of research."

"Not mine either. By the way," Stein turned back to the cherubi, "did you say 'parachuting practice'?"

"Yeah!" Cherubi hopped up and down excitedly, her second head dangling from its stem, "We were all taking turns jumping off the treetops."

Stein looked around, puzzled. "You don't seem to have any parachutes, though."

"We were just practicing the jumping off part," Seedot called as he attempted to shimmy his way back up the nearest tree, "the parachute part comes after we actually find some parachutes."

The pineco spoke up from its place on the ground. "I still say we should have asked the whispering tree and her hollow ward for assistance."

"We disagree," Exeggcute shivered, "the empty one made us very nervous."

"It was after my nutrients!" shouted Cherubi's second head.

"Wait, wait," Dante interrupted, "what whispering tree?"

The trees of the deep forest trembled imperceptibly as an unknown entity contacted their roots. Were the trees capable of independent movement, they would have shrank away from the touch; it would not have mattered, for their roots were then seized by the entity as it linked itself with them.

The forest regarded the entity, and was unable to process what it found. It felt plantlike and rigid, yet it moved of its own power. It was unnatural, yet it was at one with nature. It reeked with the aura of death, yet it was swathed in an unmistakable cloak of life.

{What are you,} the forest seemed to ask, unable to reconcile with the strange and contradictory creature, {are you flora or fauna? Alive or dead?}

{I am all these things,} the entity responded, and the woods were not expecting it to speak to them in the language of trees. {Mostly, I am a traveler,} it continued, {brought from another world, and I seek my fellow travelers; they feel of death, as I do, though they still move.}

{We have sensed such creatures,} the forest said. {They passed through our forest to reach the clearing, where the hoofed ones live. They have begun passing through again to reach the other side; we can show you the way.}

{My sincerest thanks,} spoke the entity, {but I have nothing to give in return.}

{There is no need,} the forest replied, {though we must ask this: many new lives have entered our forest, be they plant, animal, or something in between; what sort of beings are you travelers?}

The trees had no concept of emotion, only of existence; as such, the smile the entity gave was lost on them.

{We are called 'pokémon'.}

And as the forest guided the traveling 'pokémon' to its fellows, the Equus trees took no notice of the hollow, chitinous exoskeleton grasping the bark of the traveler's head.

It did not mind being unnoticed; it did not mind anything.

"Remind me again what we're looking for?"

I sighed as I turned back to Frothing Stein, twirling my moustache like a nervous habit.

"We're looking for a tree that can move and has arms; trust me, you'll know when you see her."

"Her?"

"Dan, buddy! I think I found something!"

I turned my attention to Jack, but I knew not to get my hopes up when he 'finds' something. As such, I wasn't surprised to see him holding up something that was definitely not a clue.

"Jack," I deadpanned, "that's an apple."

The gourgeist blinked, looking at the fruit in his hands. "Oh." He blinked again. "Can I have it? I'm hungry."

"Ghosts don't need to eat."

Jack looked at me expectantly.

I sighed again. "Yes, you can have it."

I rubbed my temples as Jack bounced away happily; even after I'm dead, my team can still give me a headache.

"Thanos," I called, catching the dusclops' attention, "any luck?"

"None at all," he replied, flicking the yellow knob on top of his head, "blasted antenna is still on the fritz."

I clenched my teeth frowned. "We'll have to get that looked at when we get back to the mansion. Speaking of which, we should hurry up our search; I told Tesla to bring the mansion around to meet us outside the forest at sunset, and you all remember what happened last time we left him alone in the mansion for more than 6 hours."

Chandler bobbed into view, waving an appendage. "We could always--"

"NO, Chandler," I interrupted, "we're not going to set the trees on fire and see which one screams."

"You're no fun, daddy."

"Technically," Lucius said as he popped out of my shadow, "he's not alone; Banafrit is there too."

I turned back to Chandler. "After careful review, the committee has decided that your idea has merit."

"Yay!"

"Wait," called a voice from the forest, "I'm right here! I'm over here!"

"Aww..."

I smiled as a trevenant pushed through the treeline into the path we were taking.

"Good to see you're alright," I said, "just let me give the signal and we can head back to the mansion."

I nodded to Lucius, who rose quickly into the sky.

"Dazzling Gleam!"

A bright flash shot across the sky; I nodded, waving Frothing Stein over.

"Let's get introductions out of the way; this is Frothing Stein, beverage magnate and fellow scientist, and he's been helping us get around and find the crew." I turned to Stein. "Stein, this is our team's gardener and horticultural expert; her name is Acacia."

And as Stein shook hands-- er, claws-- hooves? Whatever. As Stein greeted the ghostly tree, he looked at me and spoke.

"She doesn't drop acorns, does she?"

Author's Note

Hey look, another chapter!

Yes, Jack, another chapter.

Will our intrepid heroes reach the mansion in time to save the Queen from Tesla's antics?
Who (or what) is this mysterious hollow creature attached to Acacia's head?
Why is Thanos' antenna receiving such heavy interference?
Can the forest pokémon master the art of parachuting?

Find out... I dunno, eventually I guess.

Ch 13: A Shell of a 'Mon

It had been precisely 5 hours, 47 minutes and 32 seconds since the search and rescue groups had been deployed. Tesla knew; he'd been counting. And while tesla had been counting, he'd also taken the time afforded to him by doing a few "productive" tasks.

The rotom was just about finished gathering supplies and was preparing to put his plan in motion when--

"Tesla! Drop whatever you're doing and come here!"

Blast and botheration, the professor was back! Now what was he going to do with all of this raw gluten-free spaghetti?

With a staticky sigh, the electrical ghost shot through the mansion to greet the returning groups.

"Any problems?" Tesla asked as both groups returned, "I see you found Thanos."

"Indeed we did," Dante replied. "We also found Acacia on our way back. Make sure you log them in the checklist and have Durendal take the kids to their rooms; I'm going with Acacia to show Stein the garden."

"Yes, kapitän," the rotom replied, mentally cataloging the new arrivals. "Thanos: check. Chandler: check. Acacia: check."

Tesla took a quick look at the trevenant as she trundled off, noting what was stuck to the bark on her back.

"Cassius: check."

"So I couldn't help but notice," said Frothing Stein as he followed Dante and Acacia into the mansion's indoor greenhouse, "that this mansion has a lot of large rooms"

"Well yes," the ghost professor replied, "that's kind of the point in having a mansion."

"No, I know that but--" Stein hesitated.

Should I ask?

Go right ahead.

Alright...

"It's just that this place looked a lot smaller on the outside."

Dante and Acacia both froze, turning a wary eye at the pony professor. At the same time, Lucius formed from the shadows, regarding Stein coolly.

"Should we tell him?" the shadow whispered to Dante, not taking his eyes off of Stein.

I thought you said I could ask!

I never said they'd react positively.

The captain-king narrowed his eyes in thought, hands behind his back. "I doubt there are laws against it on this world," he said after a moment, "and Stein has been nothing but trustworthy so far. Yes, I'll tell him."

The group seemed to relax as Dante floated over to Stein, who released a breath he hadn't realized he was holding.

"Let me show you something," said Dante, showing Stein over to a shuttered window. With the unicorn's attention, the ghost opened the shutters to reveal...

A whole lot of nothing.

"That is one empty void," Stein observed.

But why is it purple?

"Behold," Dante proclaimed, sweeping an arm out over the swirling purple emptiness, "the Spirit World!"

"Fascinating..."

That still doesn't explain why it's purple.

Ghosts are just purple, okay?

Eh, sure. Makes as much sense as anything in this story.

"I spent years of research and put a small fortune into making this in secret, using data I collected from my team's expeditions into this realm," I said to Stein. "Several ghost-type pokémon on my team can travel to and from this place, of course."

"Of course," Stein said. "But why in secret?"

"Ah, that's a funny story..." I replied, rubbing the back of my head, "I'm afraid tampering with the supposed 'realm of the dead' was a bit of a social tabboo on Earth; sort of like human/pokémon relationships or walking around naked."

"Fair enough," Stein shrugged, "we have some dumb laws here too; I can't tell you how off-putting it was when the royal guard told me I couldn't donate my old lungs after I replaced them." A roll of the eyes. "I mean honestly; I wasn't using them anymore, and there were probably plenty of sick foals who could have used them, but apparently gift-wrapping them was 'excessive'."

I nodded; Stein was definitely the reasonable sort. "If the authorities were to find out, it would only have inconvenienced both them and myself; there were plenty of genuine psychopaths calling themselves 'scientists' that were more deserving of investigation." I scowled as I remembered a particularly nasty former colleague. "I wonder if they ever caught Rupert after he lost his mind."

"I do have to question how you funded this in secret, though," the unicorn interrupted, "using research grants would leave an obvious paper trail."

"You'd be surprised at how much you can put under 'living and recreational expenses' actually," I smirked at Stein. "Remind me to show you the arcade later. But you're right, I funded this little project with money I acquired through non-scientific means. Back on Earth, my team was quite formidable in the field of pokémon battles; back in the day, they called me 'Dante the untouchable'."

Lucius chuckled at my side. "I was unbeatable then; I lost count of how many fairies I blew away..."

Stein tapped a hoof to his chin. "I think I remember hearing something about friendly sparring contests being integral to your society..."

"Something like that, yeah," I shrugged. "It's funny; people always told me that ghost-types were niche battlers, but they should've seen the looks on their faces when Cassius would beat them without taking a single hit."

Stein looked confused. "Who's Cassius?"

It took me a moment to realize what he meant. "Oh," I said, "I forgot, you don't know about that." I waved Acacia over and gestured for her to turn around, revealing an insectoid shell with slits for eyes and wings made from the cracks in its back, the halo floating above it giving it an otherworldly appearance.

"This," I introduced to Stein, "is Cassius, our team's shedinja; it likes to cling to Acacia's bark."

Cassius said nothing as Dante introduced it to the non-ponyta creature, electing to float quickly around to scan the equine before settling back on one of Acacia's branches.

This one isn't very talkative.

Stein was yet again thinking in someone else's section.

Oops.

Cassius was okay with it, actually. Cassius was okay with a lot of things.

Oh, erm... Would Cassius like to say something?

Not particularly; Cassius has never needed words. Or sustenance.

I don't--

Cassius has no mouth. Cassius has no organs. Cassius is the discarded exoskeleton of a pokémon, left behind during evolution.

Cassius is starting to creep Stein out...

Cassius is okay with that. Cassius wished only to continue existing; first with Acacia, and now with Amaranth.

Well... Good for Cassius, then.

Cassius could incapacitate Stein in over 120 ways, roughly two thirds of which were non-lethal.

STEIN WOULD LIKE TO SWITCH PERSPECTIVES NOW, PLEASE!

Thanos rubbed his temples as his head throbbed; his antenna was practically killing him all over again.

"Confounded thing," he muttered, heading for the laboratory to call in a checkup, "I can barely sense my own hands in front of my face anymore!" Honestly, the only time he'd ever felt anything CLOSE to this was when...

It was when...

But that's impossible...

"Than the man! Hey, Thanos!" Jack was bouncing over faster then Thanos thought possible, his face uncharacteristically stressed. "Where's Dan!? We got a big problem!"

The buzzing in Thanos' head intensified as the gourgeist approached, and the reaper had to struggle between his headache and his newfound worry to force out his next words.

"W-what kind of p-p-problem?"

And as Jack held out the object in his fibrous hands, Thanos felt the bottom of his bottomless stomach drop out as his fears were confirmed.

It was Legion's keystone.

Or rather, both halves of it.

Author's Note

GRADUAL TONE SHIFT? PROPER PACING?! WHAT ARE THESE ALIEN CONCEPTS YOU SPEAK OF?!?!

Dante keeps most of his technological stuff in the spirit realm, which I think Arceus would have brought over for the sake of the ghost-types. (I was going to make an "it's bigger on the inside" reference, but then I remembered I'm not actually a proper Dr. Who fan.)

Again, feedback on this story is HIGHLY encouraged; tell me what jokes you liked, what you think could be improved, which characters you want to know more about, etc.

Can YOU spot the unauthorized reference to a more popular fic?

Ch 14: Spooky Scary Spiritombs

Amaranth Laboratories

Detection and Scanning

This was a problem.

"Everything hurts," groaned Thanos as Goliath 'mon-handled him into the ultrascanner's chair.

This was definitely a problem.

Jack and Ravid both peeked out from behind an overturned table, using it as a barrier between them and the containment platform holding the remains of Legion's keystone.

This was definitely a terrible, horrible problem.

Lucius, clad in a lab coat and safety goggles, put a hand on my shoulder.

"What's the problem?"

I grunted in frustration as I wrung the white piece of cloth in my hands. "This stupid lab coat won't fit anymore, it's too big!"

It was high time to get some SCIENCE done around here, and one does not simply perform science without a labcoat! One is not allowed in the laboratory without proper dress!

Frothing Stein, who wore a labcoat and goggles at all times like a reasonable being, spoke up while I fished a smaller labcoat out of the closet.

"Apart from the labcoat," he said, sounding a bit worried, "is there something terribly wrong? Thanos seems a bit out of it."

"How am I seeing double?!" I heard from the lab, "I'm a cyclops!"

Finding a suitable labcoat and putting it on, I waved a hand at Stein dismissively. "Oh it's nothing, he'll be fine once we hook him up to the mainframe." I turned to the large display screen hooked to the ultrascanner, which lit up to display a virtual rendering of a rotom in a room full of circuitry. "Tesla, have you reconfigured the system to use that map of Equestria?"

"Affirmatif, kapitän!"

"Good." I pointed dramatically at the overturned table as I floated into the lab. "Ravid!"

The little gremlin jumped upright and rushed over to a large control panel.

I clenched a hand in the air as I glared towards Thanos, now fully secured in the metal chair with electrodes attatched to his antenna.

"THROW THE SWITCH!"

"Yess, Masster."

And all at once, the laboratory went dark.

"Let the science begin..."

Lightning arced between electric coils atop the machinery, and, layer by layer, the tiles beneath Thanos rose, lighting up as they lifted the chair. The display came to life once more, the word 'LOADING' fading in white from a deep purple background, which soon gave way to a map of Equus. Thanos' single eye started to glow and, slowly but surely, a shadowy substance began flowing from Thanos' antenna down the wires attaching the chair to the machine, then from the machine to the display. The ping of a radar sounded as a wave rippled across the map and dozens upon dozens of dots appeared in different locations, scattered all over the planet.

"Bingo," I said, hi-fiveing Lucius as we floated to the control console, "we've found them."

"What bingo," asked Stein, trotting over as well, "what've we found?"

A deep rumble eminated from Goliath, who had retreated to the corner of the room. "...Legion..."

"Another one of our teammates, sort of," explained Lucius as I typed away at the controls. "Legion is a spiritomb and, as such, is a congregation of over a hundred souls merged into one being." He gestured to the broken keystone. "These souls are supposed to be bound to a keystone like that one, usually for misdeeds they performed in life, but Legion's seal was always a little... leaky."

"What sort of misdeeds are we talking about," Stein responded, "because I tend to shy away from overwhelming evil."

"Oh, Legion as a whole was perfectly civil, but the other souls tended to get sort of twitchy if they weren't all together," I explained, taking over so Lucius could check the power couplings, "and it was Thanos' job to find them and put them back together when that happened; we built the ultrascanner primarily to boost the transmitting and receiving power of Thanos' antenna, as well as to relieve the pressure all that spiritual energy put on him." I turned to Thanos. "How're you doing over there?"

"I just need some hot tea and I should be okay," the reaper replied, and on cue, a thermos appeared from the armrest on the chair. Thanos sipped at the tea. "Darjeeling," he sighed, his eye becoming relaxed, "simply wonderful."

I nodded, typing away at the controls again. "Thanos," I said, "when you're ready, prepare to broadcast our location; we should be able to reach the closest 30 souls or so. Lucius will prepare the containment field to hold them all until we can find a new keystone."

A ghostly thumbs up and I hit the enter key, sending a spiritual signal out over a 10-mile radius.

The response was immediate; over 2 dozen of the dots on the map began to converge on our location, and ectoplasmic wisps started filtering in through the walls of the laboratory into the containment field. Upon arrival, however, many of the wisps appeared confused, floating around the energy-encased area with questioning whispers I couldn't make out. Wanting to ease their confusion and explain the situation,I tapped on the barrier to get their attention.

"Hello," I began, and the wisps gathered at the edge of the barrier to look at me. "My name is Professor Dante Amaranth; do any of you recognize me?"

The wisps whispered louder, but I could not understand the language they spoke.

"روح الملكي؟" [a royal spirit?]

"ما هو عليه تقول؟" [what is it saying?]

"يتحدث بألسنة." [it speaks in tongues.]

"I'm sorry," I hesitated, "what was that?"

More whispers I could not decipher

"وجهه ليست ملك لقد خدم، ولكن يبدو مألوفا." [His face is not that of a king I have served, but it appears familiar.]

"شاربه تبدو جيدة." [his moustache looks good.]

"Why thank you," I said, because compliments to a man's moustache have no language barrier.

While the whispering wisps wiled away in the warrier-- erm, barrier, Goliath had moved from his position in the corner to stare closely at the wayward spirits. A little too closely.

"Goliath," I said, floating up and tapping the golurk on the shoulder as he kneeled to get a better look, "everything okay, man?"

"... I... Understand..."

This took me a bit by surprise. "You understand their language?"

Slowly, Goliath nodded. "... Ancient... Unovan..."

I gasped, my eyes widening; of course, it was an ancient language! How fortunate that Goliath was ancient Unovan as well!

"Goliath," I asked excitedly, "what are they saying?"

"... They... Are..."

"Yes, go on."

"...Saying..."

"Yeeesss, yeeeessss?"

"... You... Have..."

"I have...?"

"... A... Nice... Moustache..."

My expression fell and I pinched my brow; it just had to be Goliath who understood them, didn't it? I turned to address the room at large.

"Right, this is taking forever-- DOES ANYONE ELSE HERE SPEAK ANCIENT UNOVAN?"

Jack and Ravid, both back behind the table, shrugged and shook their heads, and Thanos had drifted off to sleep with the Darjeeling tea still in his hand. Stein tapped his horn, giving a confused look.

"I guess this translation spell only works on pokémon?"

Lucius placed a hand on my shoulder, placing his safety goggles over his forehead. "I think we both know someone who lived in ancient Unova." He smiled.

Queen Banafrit, while initially displeased that no one had told her of her King's return, was intrigued by the news of scattered souls speaking the language of her former kingdom, and was more than willing to help them look into such matters.

"And these spirits were part of this 'Legion' you commanded?" the Queen asked as she put on the white coat that Dante insisted was 'for safety'. "Why do they not speak English as they did when whole?"

Dante shrugged and handed her a pair of safety goggles. "I never talked to the individual spirits when they leaked out, I just let Thanos put them back together. Oh, remind me to introduce you to everyone later; I forgot earlier."

Banafrit raised an eyebrow in question. "Why must it be later?" she asked. "You could simply call them here now."

Dante shrugged harder. "They're probably busy doing stuff or something. Plus the children are still in trouble, and that means no science for them until we hold a fair and impartial trial."

Unseen by anyone else, Banafrit frowned slightly; she hoped that Dante's version of 'fair and impartial' was different from her father's, for the children's sake.

"Not to be pushy," Frothing Stein interrupted, pointing a hoof at the wayward spirits, "but can we get on with this? The pacing of this story is all over the place."

"What?"

"What?"

Stein blinked. "Oh, did I say that out loud? Nevermind, just get going."

Dante rolled his eyes and escorted the Queen to the containment field. As they approached, the sprits inside became more active, crowding around the edge of the barrier as if to get a closer look as their whispering intensified.

"[Another royal spirit?]"

"[Look at her mask, it is the Queen!]"

"[The Queen?! We are not worthy!]"

"[She doesn't have a moustache.]"

Confused, Banafrit floated closer to the wisps. "[How do you know of me?]" she asked, switching effortlessly to her native tongue.

Several wisps shied away from the Queen as she approached, but one of them came forward.

"[My Queen,]" said the wisp, "[we all know of you quite well; in life, we were all people of your kingdom before it fell to the invaders that took your life, who bound us to a magic stone for our perceived 'crimes'. I am Ahi, a servant from the castle.]"

Banafrit's eyes widened. "[Ahi, the tinkerer? You were one of the most diligent in easing the terrors inflicted by my father; what crimes could those savages have dared convict you of?!]"

The wisp, Ahi, shook slightly as it was tinted red by anger. "[They presumed that those who worked under Ptolemy were just as wicked as he was, and that the whole of the kingdom needed to burn to prevent such evil from rising again.]" The spirit was practically fuming. "[And as if that had not been enough, they saw those who had taken pokémon as partners and declared it 'depraved' and 'sinful'!]"

"[Pretentious cads!]" the Queen growled, "[They were fortunate to have caught me off guard, lest I would have rent them limb from limb for their arrogance!]"

A gentle hand on her shoulder brought Banafrit back to the present; it was her King, looking at her with concern.

"Bunny, you're getting worked up again..."

Indeed, several more of the wisps had shied further away from the barrier at her outburst.

The Queen closed her eyes to calm down, reminding herself that such things were in the past, and those who wronged her people were since consumed by time. She faced her King, taking his hand in hers as she stared deeply into his caring eyes.

"Thank you, beloved. I was remembering the fall of my kingdom; it would happen that the souls in your 'Legion' were once my people, who were unjustly imprisoned centuries ago."

Ahi spoke up from behind the barrier, catching Banafrit's attention. "[Apologies, my queen, but who is this strange spirit?]"

The Queen turned, confused. "[Do you not recognize him?]"

"[His appearance is familiar, but I cannot recall where I have seen him. I can remeber all things clearly until just after the invasion; after that, the memories become... fragmented... and unclear... And when I think of the ritual that bound us to the stone...]" The wisp shivered, along with several others nearby who had been listening. "[I am filled with a sense of foreboding, as if I have forgotten some crucial detail of our imprisonment...]"

Unknown location

Planet Equus

Deep within a darkened cave, a great evil from times long past was stirring.

A wayward soul, its appearance no different from any other wisp, was attempting to manifest itself as something more.

He knew the incantations, the wisp thought, he had found the minerals to be sacrificed; it was only a matter of exerting his will over what lay before him, and he would begin regaining his greatness. Whatever insolent fools had sought to topple him through death would pay dearly for their ignorance.

He was Ptolemy, the Great War King, and in death, he had found his eternal life.

He would rebuild his empire.

Arceus be damned.

Author's Note

We're getting into the main plot of the story now! Make no mistake, the action is really going to pick up soon!

No it isn't.

Yeah, you're right... Still, stuff is definitely going to continue happening!

Ch 15: A Haunting Refrain

In the hills near Fillydelphia, at the edge of the forest around Foal Mountain, a cheerful ghost-type hummed to herself as she looked for something to occupy her time.

"Salagadoola mechicka boola hmm hm hm-hm-hm hmmmm..."

It was evening on the third day since Arceus had moved all of the pokémon to this new planet, and she'd spent the time since Arceus's announcement learning more about this world. The increased presence of magic energy was almost intoxicating; the thoughts of what spells and enchantments could be achieved excited the ghost-type terribly.

"It'll do magic believe it or not, hm-hm-hm hm-hm-hm hmmmm..."

Of course, magical mayhem would have to wait until after her team caught up with her. Causing a racket would just bring trouble and make things harder when the maestro came to pick her up. She hoped it was soon; the delicious fear and surprise from the nearby town was starting to fade, being replaced by a general unease dotted with bits of acceptance that formed a sickly-sweet taste, turning her stomach and making her long for some good old home cooking.

"Put 'em together and what have you got? Bibbidi bobbidi... Hmm?"

The ghost-type was interrupted from her thoughts when she heard what sounded like voices close by. Turning invisible and heading towards the noise, she came upon a lopunny and a diggersby in some sort of argument.

"Lola, please," said the diggersby, a pleading look on its face, "after so long, I finally get to see you again..."

The lopunny cringed, teary-eyed, backing away from the diggersby. "Get away from me, Dillan," she said, shaking her head as she choked back a sob, "I can't... I can't..."

"Lola," said the diggersby, Dillan, his eyes also watery, "don't do this- I lov--"

"NO," the lopunny, Lola, shouted, lashing out with one of her powerful ears, "you never loved me; the Rangers told me the truth when they arrested you!"

The attack went wide and missed completely, the lopunny unable to aim through her tears; Dillan flinched regardless, struck much harder by her words.

"The truth? The TRUTH!?" The diggersby clenched his front paws, his expression turning hard even as his crying eyes became softer. "Did they tell you the truth that my court-appointed lawyer didn't even try to defend my case? Did they tell you the truth that they stripped me of my license and took away every last member of our family!? Did they tell you the truth that my family sent me to a sanitarium where they forced hundreds of pills down my throat to try and 'fix me'!?" The tension in his body snapped, and Dillan fell to his knees as his eyes streamed freely with emotion. "Did they tell you the truth... that not once during those five years did I ever stop thinking about you?"

The lopunny trembled, taking a slight step back as she put a hand to her chest, her eyes filled with uncertainty.

The ghost-type had seen enough; the feelings of sadness and betrayal in the air were bitter enough to make her want to puke. There was only one thing for it.

"You're pulling a little to the left. And shout louder, you need to make him feel it when you hit!"

"Come on, man, I've been dead for 3 days tops."

Lucius frowned from the side of the arena and crossed his arms as he looked pointedly at Dante. "Do you want to learn astonish or not?"

The incident back in Hollow Shades worried Lucius; this new world had no experience with ghost-types, and it would only take a few mistakes from a few less-than-peaceful spirits to inflame the kind of fear and prejudice they had worked so hard to destroy back on Earth. Not to mention that the stoutland they encountered brought the question of how many... 'unenlightened' individuals Arceus might have brought along, and how many of them held the kind of radical ideals that would have them all exorcised. If those ideals seeped over to the inhabitants of Equus, Dante could become a target, and the newly-made yamask had precious little experience in the physical aspect of battle. Loath as he was to admit it, Lucius might not always be there to protect the professor; Dante needed to be able to protect himself if that ever happened.

Of course, he hadn't said this out loud. Ol' Boss needed to focus on gathering the crew as soon as possible; right now they were just "testing out his new powers" while the mansion headed to the next stop.

"Sir Lucius," called a voice, and the gengar turned to look at their 'practice dummy' Durendal, "are you quite certain we need to continue? I believe Sire is executing the move admirably at this point."

"You're just saying that because you don't want to get your shield dented," Lucius grumbled, but he had to admit that the sword had a point. Also, he was right. "Fine, let's move on to special attacks."

Floating over to a panel on the wall, Lucius entered the combination to open the 'battle storage unit' and removed a purplish disk and a greyish disk from inside. "Here, catch!" He tossed the disks to Dante, who caught them in both hands.

The disks gave a brief glow, and Dante's eyes widened as his mind assimilated the information they contained. "This is..."

"Good old TM30: Shadow Ball and TM17: Protect," Lucius grinned. "You would've learned them later anyway, we might as well get a head start."

Dante grinned in turn, foming a sphere of ethereal darkness between his hands. "I've heard it before and I'll say it now: Science really is amazing."

Frothing Stein watched with great interest as strange alien fruits grew at a highly accelerated rate from the branches of small berry trees.

Science really is amazing, isn't it?

Stein had been curious about the sort of plant life that could grow on another world, and the exciting new beverages he could create from the produce they bore; the fact that Prof. Amaranth's team had a botanist who could literally talk to trees made the whole process even easier.

Said botanist, Acacia, was quite an interesting individual. She was reserved, hardly speaking at all; when she did speak, her words were marked by a thick 'Kalosian' accent, as some of the others had explained it.

"And these 'rawst berries' are used to treat burns?"

"Oui."

The trevenant's reluctance to speak did not mesh quite well with Stein's inquisitive scientific mind, but the unicorn was trying his best to accommodate by asking simple yes or no questions.

"Fascinating... May I...?" Stein gestured at the light-blue berries, and Acacia nodded, picking one and handing it to him.

Outside appears to have seeds embedded in the skin... Aside from sky blue color, somewhat resembles a strawberry.

Stein bit into the fruit cautiously, chewing slowly.

Texture is, again, not unlike a strawberry; flavor, however, is rather bitter. Potential use in making of beverages - further data is needed, suggest full chemical analysis at home laboratory.

"Very fascinating." Stein looked back up at Acacia. "Roughly how long does it take for these to grow normally?"

The trevenant drew back a little, examining the tree.

"... Douze- twelve."

"Twelve months?" Stein tapped a hoof to his chin. "That seems reasonable; get some samples to the missus, fiddle around with the flavoring, get the trademarks through legal..."

He stopped; Acacia was shaking her head.

"Not twelve months? Twelve weeks then?"

Acacia brought her hands together in a 'compressing' motion.

"Twelve days? That's pretty fast." Stein blinked. "... Just curious, what's the shortest time it takes for a seed to grow into a berry tree and bear fruit?"

Acacia folded her hands. "Cinq jours," she stated, matter-of-factly, "five days."

Before Stein could comment on this admittedly remarkable fact, the conversation was interrupted by the arrival of another of the mansion's occupants.

"Casey, babe!" shouted Jack, bounding over from the greenhouse entrance to give the trevenant a hug, "nobody told me you were back!"

The bark around Acacia's face became a more reddish brown, and she stared fixedly at her hands.

Stein raised an eyebrow. "You were there when we found her," he pointed out to the gourgeist, "you were on the search team."

Jack brought a hand to his head, thinking for a moment. "No, I would've remembered that," the pumpkin pokémon posited, "I just remember finding that awesome leaf!"

Not the brightest lantern at the nightmare night party, is he?

Not even close.

"Anyways," Jack continued, "I was just going around telling everybody that we're about to send down Mr. Lucius, sir, to pick up Miss Hanna."

Just east of the mansion, in the shadow of Foal Mountain, a mismagius sighed in content as she watched a lopunny and a diggersby make their way into the sunset, hand in hand.

"Hannelore Melodia Von Magus-Amaranth," she spoke to herself, "you've done it again and reunited the broken bonds of old love."

It had been simple, really; she'd gotten frustrated at how stupid the lagomorphs had been and opened their hearts to eachother's feelings with a destiny bond. Then she appeared and shrieked at them until they ran screaming, magically gluing their hands together for good measure. The mismagius congratulated herself again on a job well done. She was the best matchmaker. It was her.

Hannelore was almost sad that she'd miss the emotional roller coaster the two would no doubt go through, but such is un-life. She had to wait where she was until she could join back up with the band; she had her own romantic interests to look out for.

"Hello, Hannelore."

Speak of the devil. Hannelore turned around to smile at the gengar headed towards her.

"Lucius."

The shadow pokémon looked toward the horizon at the still-fleeing couple, his face carefully devoid of emotion.

"Meddling again, I see," he said, raising an eyebrow.

The mismagius scowled and waved dismissively. "Oh, I was just cleaning up another one of the rangers' messes." She smirked at the gengar, an impish glint in her eyes. "What about you, did you miss me?"

Lucius grinned. "Like a bad rash."

And so the two ghost-types flew back to the mansion, cackling all the way.

Author's Note

Love is in the air in this chapter. That or terror. It's hard to tell sometimes.

Happy new year, everypony.

Ch 16: No Strings Attached

"No but you see, the problem was in the wording of the recipe."

Frothing Stein leaned back on the bench as he discussed potions with Hannelore, the ghostly group's most recent re-addition.

The mismagius in question tilted her head to the side. "How so?"

"Well," Stein shrugged, sipping another soda pop, "the ancient forbidden texts call for 'the blood of the enemy' to act as the catalyst; most individuals assumed it meant actual blood, like from another pony or a zebra or some suchlike." He shook his head. "This led to rather obvious problems, be it war or time or distance, or sometimes even the fact that you didn't have any enemies."

"That does sound off-key..."

"Dodge!"

A shape crashed into the wall near Stein's seat after being flung across the room by a shadowy force. The shape groaned before floating back up.

"What year is it?" Dante asked dazedly.

"Training going well, professor?" Stein quipped with a smirk.

The Yamask shook himself, putting on a determined look. "Oh, I'm just getting started," he spoke as he cracked his spectral knuckles, "I helped invent shadow dodgeball, and I will NOT be bested at my own game!"

Stein simply rolled his eyes as the former human, clad in a sweatband and wristbands, charged back onto the field to clash with an awaiting Lucius.

"Like I was saying," the unicorn turned back to the ghost on the bench with him, "ponies kept messing it up over semantics, and the ensuing bloodshed saw the potion in danger of being banned. I alone managed to restore the elixir in a fit of drunken genius. As it happened, the blood has to come from the enemy of the one brewing the potion; anyone else could use it just fine after it was done. And half of all magic is mental anyways, so I used the 'blood' of my worst, most hated foe..." Stein clenched his hoof (somehow). "Watermelons!"

"Dodge!"

Crash

Hannelore nodded as she helped the yamask remove himself from the wall. "That makes more sense as an ingredient for an anti-depressant." Briefly, she turned her attention to Dante. "You can do better than that, maestro! You have to C♯, or else you'll B♭!"

Dante groaned. "I'm glad we're picking up Alastor soon; that joke was practically criminal."

"That criminal escaped because of you!"

In a darkened alleyway, an ariados loosed a flurry of string shots at a banette, who dodged out of the way with an incensed look on its face. The ghost-type glared at the ledian who had ordered the string shot.

"The plaintiff is throwing baseless accusations against the defendant," the dark puppet proclaimed, straightening its business tie as it stood. "Mr. Dillan is an upstanding and blameless individual."

"Like hell!" the ledian shouted, rushing to tackle the banette, "Radi and I arrested that sick pervert ourselves 5 years ago when we rescued that lopunny!"

The banette made no effort to dodge as the tackle passed harmlessly through its intangible plush form, catching the bug-type in both hands before it could crash into the ground.

"Former ranger Grissom must watch his language, else he will be held in contempt of court." The banette threw the ledian at the ariados, sending both bug-types flying out of the alleyway. "This case was brought to court on faulty grounds, and summary judgment has been ruled in favor of the defendant. Court is dismissed!"

Not bothering with flourish or fanfare, the ghost-type phased through the wall at the back of the alley, disappearing before either of the bug-types could skitter back into the alley. It reappeared on a nearby rooftop, its zipper mouth in a smile. "Another case closed by Alastor Amaranth, ghost attorney."

"Uh, hey, yo uncle Al." The banette spun his head 180 degrees towards the voice that had appeared behind it, coming face to face with a very nervous looking drifblim.

"Avira," he said, turning his body around so his head was no longer on backwards, "it's good to see you. Are you here to pick me up?"

The balloon pokémon nodded, not quite meeting eyes with Alastor. "Pops is back at da base- he sent me to get ya so's we didn't hafta land 'till tamarrow."

"Very well," replied the plushy poltergeist, raising both arms, "matters here have been settled to the fullest extent of my limited knowledge of the laws on this world; I look forward to seeing His Honor again."

As Avira wrapped his ribbon-like appendages around Alastor's raised arms, the banette smiled mischievously and spoke. "I also look forward to seeing what kind of trouble you've gotten into."

The drifblim cringed before lifting off of the rooftop to fly back to the mansion.

One quick trial later...

"Ow..." Avira rubbed a sore spot on his backside as I led him into the room, Chandler floating in behind him. "Dat always stings..."

"It's not that bad," said Chandler, rolling her eyes as she rubbed her appendages together.

"Oh says you! I get da voodoo acupuncture treatment an' all you get is literally a slap on da wrist!"

"Chandler was in time out when we found her," I interrupted, eyeing Avira as I directed them down the hallway, "and she wasn't in as much trouble as you were– oh but what's past is past. Now come along, there's someone I'd like you both to meet."

Queen Banafrit sat alone on the canopy bed, contemplating the flawlessly smooth platinum of her mask as she pondered the fractured spiritomb, Legion. She imagined the remains of her people, her kingdom, bound unjustly to a cursed stone for crimes they had not committed; she thought of them now, lost and confused, their souls scattered across a planet they did not know...

It was uncertain which notion the former queen found more troubling.

A sudden rapping at the door caught the shiny yamask's attention, bringing her out of her thoughts.

"Knock knock," said a voice, and Dante's head phased through the wooden door. "I know knocking is pointless because we're ghosts, but I wanted to be polite."

Banafrit gave a small smile in spite of herself; the self-proclaimed Spirit King seemed to have a talent for cheering her up.

"Please, enter."

And, as Dante ushered two pokémon into the room to be introduced, Banafrit's thoughts drifted ever so slightly away from the plight of her people. She had done all she could for now, and it would not do to exhaust herself by dwelling on such things; with her King and his subjects by her side, she doubted that anything could give them pause.

"Stupid rag doll and his stupid convict friend..." Grissom muttered, rubbing his fists as he flew down the sidewalk next to Radi. The ariados stayed carefully quiet, watching the ledian in case his wings gave out; the former human was getting better at flying, but it had only been 3 days.

"'Summary judgement' my eye; we'll nab that sicko just like we did 5 years ago."

Radi winced at that; her trainer was always a little... forceful about his job.

"Are you sure we need to do this?" Radi asked, "Arceus did say that he only brought those who were worthy..."

Grissom scoffed, crossing his four arms. "Don't tell me you buy that, Radi; Arceus isn't that powerful."

Radi winced again; that kind of talk gets 'mons erased from existence.

"No," the ranger continued, "we're going to find that perp and lock him back up, and then we're going for that stupid ghost-type!"

"Ghost-type?" A stoutland appeared from the corner they were just about to turn onto, sniffing the air hurriedly. "Where are they, I'll smite them where they stand!"

Grissom sighed. "Cool off, skippy, there's nothing there; I was just thinking out loud."

The stoutland paused and looked at the bug-types. "Skippy? My name is Corporal; defender of truth and bringer of justice to all scoundrels! Along with my faithful ally, Biscuits."

Another creature walked out from behind the corner; it was some canine looking thing, probably a local.

"Corporal," it whined in a pleading tone, "I'm tired, can we rest?"

The stoutland ignored the question, looking closely at Radi and Grissom.

"You haven't been having any ghost problems, have you?"

"Oh don't get me started," the ledian grumbled, "I ever see that punk again and I'll..."

"What good fortune we should meet, then!" the stoutland interrupted, "you two should join me as I sniff out those deathly degenerates on my quest of justice!"

Oh boy, Radi didn't like where this was going—

"Deal! I need to serve up some LAW to that creep!"

And there it goes. Radi groaned to herself as Grissom and Corporal shook hands/paws, while Biscuits just sat there looking confused.

Grissom looked back at her and smiled. "I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship."

Author's Note

Another member of the crew has been returned, and our haunting hero is learning the ins and outs of his new form. All is not well, however, as the brave-hearted (though terribly misguided) Corporal meets up with the self-righteous ranger Grissom, forming their own league of idiots to pursue their skewed visions of so-called "justice" for the specters.

I started imagining Corporal as being voiced by Adam West, and now I can't get the thought out of my head.

Ch 17: Dead in the Water

Baltimare was a thriving port town, full of industry and commerce. Equestrian goods were often sent there to be shipped overseas by way of horseshoe bay, while all manner of items from foreign lands were received there to be sent all over the kingdom by train or delivery pegasus. The town itself was packed with market vendors, selling inventory that would spoil if they tried to ship it out.

When Dante had announced that the town was their next stop, Frothing Stein had insisted that the yamask go into town with him (Lucius had, of course, followed in the yamask's shadow); Stein's company had a large base here where he'd set up a family summer home, and the unicorn wanted to introduce the ghost-types to "the greatest pony family they'll ever meet (on that particular day in that particular headquarters)!"

Well I don't want to oversell it; there are plenty of perfectly pleasant packs of ponies of particular pedigrees and progeny.

Sure, whatever. As Stein led the pair of ghouls through the town, he noticed a certain tension in the atmosphere. There were fewer stalls open, and the streets weren't nearly as crowded and bustling as usual. The professor ushered the group along faster; something told him they didn't want to dawdle for whatever might be going on.

I bet it's another side story taking place, and that Wooden Bit stallion is no doubt involved. Harrumph! That jerk; I bet his story's even canon!

Stein's internal ranting was short-lived, however, as they approached a large, brightly-colored building that looked almost like someone had coated a factory in candy. The bricks were colored in a variety of shades of green, the mortar tinted a faint puce, and tall, thick red-and-white striped smokestacks stood at irregular places on the lemon yellow roof, bubbles floating out of them. Above a set of tall, orange double doors, a sign glowed slightly in bright purple letters.

FrSt Foods

Flavor comes FrSt!

"Welcome to the factory!" Stein proclaimed, sweeping a hoof towards the entrance, which slowly opened at the unicorn's prodding.

Dante stared, squinting a little at the sheer brightness of the place. "It's very... Colorful."

Stein shrugged. "Didn't know what the place would look like until it was finished," he said, leading the group inside to a more modestly-colored office, "and we're so close to the bay that we can't paint over it."

"And I still say it's your fault for getting puce mortar!"

All eyes turned to the back doorway, where another stallion was entering the room. Dante gasped, while Lucius simply stared; the pony looked near-identical to Frothing Stein, even down to his clothing, save for the fact that he had no horn. As the lookalike drew further into the office, Dante noted that his 'cutie mark' was that of a waffle cone topped with a large purple gemstone, surrounded by little wrapped candies.

"I've told you a hundred times," Stein responded to the newcomer, "I ordered puce because they were out of periwinkle!"

"You should have gone for MAUVE!"

"Hold it! Hold everything!" Lucius, wanting to avoid a shouting contest, popped up between the two equines, giving Stein a questioning glare. "What is going on here? Who's this guy?!"

"Zounds," the hornless Stein exclaimed, pointing a hoof at Lucius, "a specter!"

The mysterious stallion was, in fact, Professor Frigid Stone, one of Stein's triplet brothers who co-owned the company.

"I didn't know you had brothers," Dante posited.

"You never asked," Stein replied. "But yes, I have two near-identical brothers; Stone here is my earth-pony brother, and..." Stein glanced around, looking for someone else, before turning to the earth pony. "Where is old feather brains anyway?"

'Stone' shrugged. "He's out of the office right now; off working on his 'lemon twister' I think."

Author couldn't think of a name?

Nnnnnnope. Ran out of words starting with 'fr' that had to do with food.

Uuuughh, now there's two of them.

Hey, you're supposed to narrate, leave the color commentary to us.

What he said.

(Oh Arceus give me strength...)

"So," Dante interjected, "what does Stone here do?"

Stone puffed out his chest, a proud look on his face. "I am one of Equestria's foremost scientific minds in the field of physics and geology, though I do dabble in other fields."

"We all dabble," Stein remarked. "I think he's asking about your talents with sweets."

Stone blinked, his smile wavering a bit.

"Right, yeah, I'm good at candy and ice cream too. Invented a hundred and thirty-seven flavors sold worldwide. Pays the bills and such."

Had to spoil it, didn't you?

Sorry, just making sure the audience knows. Besides, a hundred thirty-seven is a big number!

"Well anyhow," said Stein, speaking aloud again, "what say you come with us on an adventure?"

Stone's smile drooped further. "I'm sorry, but I can't."

"But... But why not? You love adventure!"

"Brother," Stone sighed, placing a hoof on Stein's shoulder, "you know that any other day I'd leap at the chance to go exploring and let the company run itself, but matters here require my full attention. Yours too, if you can help."

Stein's eyebrows contracted. "What's the situation?"

"One of those new 'pokémon' creatures is blocking our supply route, shouting that he won't move until we 'get word ta th' Cap'm'."

Dante and Lucius, both of whom had been uninterested, suddenly snapped to attention.

Aahh, another new character?

You know it.

"Ye filthy landlubbin' layabout, I'll keelhaul the lot of yeh!"

"I'll sooner walk the plank as fall tae a bilge rat like ye!"

"Thems be fightin' words, ye bald-faced picaroon!"

I sighed, noticing Lucius put a hand to his face as crashing sounds echoed out from the room in front of us.

"It sounds like he's made a friend," I muttered.

Opening the door, I was very nearly greeted by a Hydro Pump to the face; I barely managed to throw a Protect up around myself as torrents of water rushed towards me. I sighed in relief as the attack splashed harmlessly off the shield.

Stein and Stone, both standing to either side of me, did not sigh in relief, as they were thoroughly soaked.

Inside of the room, amidst the remains of several broken and empty wooden crates, stood two beings, both staring in shock (and slight dread) at our entrance. The first, whom I recognized as my missing teammate, was a jellicent, tinted a noticeable shade of green rather than the blue that was common of the species.

"Marcellus!" I called, putting on my 'I am disappoint' face, "Front and center!"

The water/ghost type flinched, hovering over to me. "Cap'm!" he blurbled, "I knew ye'd find me! Yer lookin' well– erm, metaphorically speakin'..."

I responded with a glare. "Deck. Swab. Three years."

"Aye, Cap'm." The jellicent swam solemnly through the air to hover next to me, where Lucius could continue glaring at him as I looked back at the destroyed room.

The second individual, whom I did not recognize, was an odd creature, who looked almost like someone had stuck the back end of a pyroar to a flying-type, then dyed the result a myriad of different colors before sticking a black moustache on its beak. Its feathers were green at the front and face, fading to white at the wings and plumage, with dark orange talons; at the back, it had off-white fur marked with black stripes all over, its tail alternating with black and white rings. It wore a short navy-blue jacket that had holes in the back to accommodate its wings, and it held a worn (but still serviceable) tricorne in one talon. The creature looked warily towards the sodden pony professors, who regarded it coolly behind their goggles.

"Ah-heh– ahoy perfessors," the creature spoke, its gruff voice obviously male. "This ain't near as bad as it be lookin'–"

Stein and Stone spoke in unison. "This is coming out of your pay."

"Arr..." his head drooped as he put his hat back on.

Introductions were held; the jellicent was introduced as Marcellus, first (and only) commander in our team's aquatic division, and the feathered-and-furred creature (called a 'gryphon') was introduced as Freighter Stern, company partner in charge of shipping materials and goods.

"But– if he's a company partner, how can you dock his pay?"

Both professor ponies shrugged. "How do you keep your kids grounded when they can phase through walls?"

"Fair point," I conceded. "Also, should we address the interesting coincidence that both Stern and Marcellus talk like pirates?"

Stein and Stone looked contemplative for a moment.

"Nah."

"Nope."

I nodded. "Cool."

"So," Stein turned to Stone, clapping a hoof on the earth pony's shoulder, "since that little situation is taken care of, how about that adventure?"

Author's Note

Wow, with as many characters as we're introducing, we'll need a mansion to fit them all...
...wait...

Ch 18: Cold as Death

"Avast," proclaimed Marcellus, "that be a sure sight fer sore eyes!"

The group, which now included both Frigid Stone and Freighter Stern, had just arrived at the outskirts of the bay, near hayseed swamps, where Dante's mansion sat parked on the shore.

Lucius smirked from the shadows cast by the setting sun of the fourth day. "Anxious to get back to your mop, swabbie?"

"...Aye..." The would-be pirate slumped a little, "quite almostly forgot about that..."

At the back of the group, Frigid Stone shook his head, looking to his brother.

Quite the taskmaster, that one.

Frothing Stein gave a roll of his eyes behind his ever-present goggles.

You're one to talk. For that matter, so am I. Regardless, Professor Amaranth seems to make an effort to be both fair and stern.

[Eh? Wha? Someone thinkin' me name?]

Not you, Stern.

Oh for- the gryphon can do that too?!

Yes.

Now narrate.

*grimble grumble*– The narrative, having had quite enough of this and being in dire need of a drink (hard or soft, it didn't care anymore), skipped ahead to a first person section.

[Feh, wimp.]

Shut up.

I floated off of the upper deck with Lucius at my back, giving one last glance at the ghost/water-type busying himself with a mop.

... Wait, when did we get to the deck?

No, right, we came in, stopped to get a mop, and I escorted Marcellus to the deck for swabbing duty while Stein and them went off to do... whatever it is they do. I remember now.

Shaking off the odd sense of temporal distortion, I float-marched back to the laboratory. Putting on my temporary new lab coat– I really should get this one monogrammed before I could call it my official lab coat– I approached the ultrascanner, pleasantly surprised to see Thanos awake already.

I caught his attention with a wave before speaking. "The operation was a success; Marcellus has been successfully retrieved."

Thanos nodded, upturning a cup of tea into the mouth on his torso as he closed the book he'd been reading.

"I suppose, then," he asked, "that it's time to go hunting for major concentrations of Legion's souls?"

I frowned. "You know we're waiting until we recover the whole team to start that quest."

Thanos shifted slightly, making an effort not to look me in the eyes. "The center of the closest cluster is about a hundred miles west–"

"Thanos, we have to go get her."

The reaper slumped back in his chair, letting out a groan. "Do I have to?"

"Now now, Thanos," Lucius interjected, extending his shadowy form to coil around Thanos like a seviper, "do we need to have a calm, civil heart-to-heart?"

The larger ghost-type started, shaking his head in earnest. "Th-that won't be necessary; she's just northwest, on the snow-capped hills near the city."

"Good 'mon, Thanos." Lucius unwound himself from the chair, shrinking back into my shadow.

I felt the slightest hint of concern in back of my mind; I could never figure how Lucius could instill such fear in so many of the others, and the shadow pokémon would always claim total ignorance if I tried to ask him about it. I eventually gave up altogether; as my oldest and most trusted friend, Lucius was allowed to have his own little secrets.

Besides, I mentally shrugged, there are more important things to attend to.

Which winter hat should I wear for this mission...?

With a Cossack on my cranium and Lucius to my left, I followed Thanos up the snowy incline of the hill, Frigid Stone trudging along beside me.

"Remind me why I need to be here?" Thanos grumbled irritably, massaging his antenna. "I'm feeling better after the ultrascanner, but the lingering effects will probably wear off soon."

Lucius appeared with a grin, this time forming from Thanos' shadow. "Because; if there's a blizzard up here, we could get terribly lost, and I wanted to be sure you were telling the truth about our last teammate being here." The shade drew closer to the reaper, his voice becoming hushed. "Of course, I know you would never lie to the boss and me... right?"

The cyclops shivered as he quickly nodded, and it likely had nothing to do with the temperature.

Lucius smirked before drawing back to my side. "Plus, with you out here, she might come straight to us."

Thanos cringed, groaning a little as he worked his hands around his temples. "I can never get any peace of mind when she's around." He threw both hands in the air. "She pesters me almost constantly, insisting I read those inane backwards picture books!"

"They're called manga, Thanos-sempai."

The large ghost quite literally froze at the voice, his body being instantly coated up to his neck in a perfectly sculpted ice cube. The red pupil of Thanos' eye darted back and forth as he tried to turn his head, stopping dead upon sighting a familiar figure. I turned to look as well, giving a chuckle; I knew that ice-work. I smiled.

"Thanos-sempai," the white figure cooed, glomping the ice cube, "I knew you'd find me! –N-not that I was waiting for you, you big dummy..."

I rolled my eyes and spoke up. "Hello, Rin."

At 5 feet tall, Rin was rather large for a froslass, and the ribbon around her midsection was a light pinkish-purple instead of the usual red. Aside from those small differences, however, she looked the same as any member of her species, with a hollow dress-like 'body' and long sleeve-like arms hanging down from where a human's ears would be.

Rin looked at me, her eyes widening in recognition.

"Dante-hakase," the ice/ghost-type exclaimed, "you died!"

"So I've been told," I responded, rolling my eyes again.

Rin squeed a little, Thanos temporarily forgotten, as she rushed to meet me.

"You're a yamask," she said, inspecting my golden face, "that's supaa kowaii-desu!"

Frigid Stone, standing a couple of feet back, presumably in an attempt to stay out of freezing range, raised an eyebrow.

"I'd like to say that I've never even been to Neighpon and I still feel vaguely offended."

Lucius, popping out of my lengthening mid-afternoon shadow, glanced sideways at Rin as he spoke to Stone.

"Don't mind her," he whispered in explanation, "she's kind of a nut. I believe the specific word for her kind is otaku."

"Hmm," Stone nodded sagely, "well I suppose 'otaku' is better than 'weeaboo'." He glanced at Thanos. "Also, is he alright? Being frozen in that position can't be comfortable."

"Oh he'll be fine," Lucius shrugged. "The hard part will be getting him back to the base so Goliath can crack open this ice. Honestly, that stuff won't break unless you hit it with a truck."

Focused as I was on listening in on the conversation while also not letting Rin realize I was ignoring her, I failed to notice the pony-sized object hurtling toward our spot on the mountain until it was within shouting distance.

"Iiiiinnnnnccccooommmiiiiiiiiing!!!"

There was an enormous crash as something green and white plowed straight through Thanos, shattering the ice encasing the ghost and throwing up an icy mist as it hit the snowy mountainside.

All heads (including Thanos, now free from the ice) turned to the pile of snow where the inexplicable projectile had left a pony-shaped hole. Soon enough, what should pop out but the front of a pony.

"I hope nopony is hurt; got a bit caught up in a citrus cyclone."

A very familiar-looking pony.

Frothing Stone trotted to the front of the group, grabbing the pony on a one-armed (legged? forelimbed?) hug.

"There you are, brother! Stein came by the office asking about you earlier!"

"Stone? Why are you–" a gasp. "Zounds, a phantom!"

Feeling better?

The narrative gripped the mug of bubbling potion; it did, in fact, feel better.

What'd I tell you; a good mug of potionade can cure what ails you.

The narrative pointed out that Stein was ailing it.

And my sniffles are completely gone! Aha! Aha-ha! Haaaaa...

['Tweren't that funny.]

I know...

Jokes aside, the narrative felt almost good as new, its headache having vanished.

Hey, we're back from the mountains! Guess who I found?

YO YO, Professor Fructose Storm is in the HOUSE!

And now it was back.

I'll make some stronger potionade.

Please do.

Author's Note

Author: So, Thanos, how are you feeling?

Thanos:

Author: ... okay then.

Ch 19: Dead 'Mon Walking

You sure you're alright?

The narrative nodded, nursing a very large mug of bubbling potionade.

Again, I am very sorry for shouting; I didn't know you had a migraine.

And I'm sorry for not telling him you had a migraine.

It's fine, just– the narrative needs a secondary character chapter to calm itself.

Right... We'll just be off. Won't bother you at all.

[Aye.]

Just go already.

Sure, sure. See you later.

Bye; Sorry again.

[Fair winds and all that.]

The narrative sighed as it heard a door close behind it– it finally had some peace and quiet. The narrative started the chapter.

Somewhere, deep in the badlands of Equestria, a great evil plotted. The–

Hold on, sorry, need a moment; I forgot my keys. Where did I put– ah, there they are. Again, so sorry, please carry on.

... The ritual had been a success. This new body, though weak and immaterial, would serve his purposes for now.

As he thought of his new form, he contemplated the golden visage he held in his hands. This was the face of a conqueror, a fearsome warrior-monarch who ruled lands more vast than any simple-minded peasant could hope to fathom! To see such a godlike countenance reduced to a mere mockery of his former greatness enraged him to no end; once he had a foothold from which to take over this pitiful planet, he would find those who had robbed him of his empire and make them beg for death.

He was shaken from his brooding as he made to tighten his grip on an absent staff, his translucent hands finding only air. He growled; capable though he was, it would be grueling to claw his way back to greatness.
If he only had but a single follower, one minuscule vestige of his former–

Ah, sorry, coming through; forgot my bit pouch. Pretty sure it's– yep, there, got it. Sorry to interrupt, go ahead and keep going.

......one minuscule vestige of his former glory, anything to stifle the dreariness that was so far below a god-king such as he!

His postulating was cut short as he sensed a presence behind him. Acting on instinct, he whipped around to face the unknown entity, moving as if to behead it with a bladed weapon. Fortunately for the entity, his hands were still empty.

The creature that had approached him was large and round, with branching wings and a tail all striped in many colors. It was a sigilyph, bowing deeply to him with no regard–

Eh-heh, sorry, have to squeeze by a moment; I forgot my hat. It's embarrassing really, what with me almost always wearing it– right, there, found it! Sorry again, just gonna squeeze past again... Don't mind me, feel free to continue.

......... *sigh*. With no regard for his reactive attempt to slay it.

"Oh great master," it spoke, not daring to meet his gaze, "oh highest of all beings, my supreme ruler; I have waited centuries for your return, ever since the palace fell, so that I may serve you again!"

He said nothing, thoughtfully considering the pokémon prostrating itself before him; this sigilyph was familiar to him...

Of course! It was his weakest of servants at the time of his rule, the one who had been ever willing to follow his every command. Back in his days of glory, he had dismissed the pathetic thing, telling it to pace the castle grounds endlessly; it had complied without hesitation, never stopping to rest for even an instant as he watched in amusement.

His impulses told him to disembowl this spineless failure where it stood for daring to sully his greatness with its presence; and yet...

[Say, matey, could ye spare a cup o' grog?]

SHOVE OFF!

[... Well SOMEone's got sharks in their undercarriage...]

(Ugh, these wall-breakers... Where were we? Hmm, attempted slaying, weak servant, disembowl... Here it is.)

No... An underling as loyal as this would be difficult, and its survival spoke greatly of how the centuries had made it more powerful. Indeed, this sigilyph could be of great use to him in his conquest of this world.

"Rise, servant," he commanded, a wicked smirk on his lips, "rise and serve your master."

The sigilyph obeyed, its eyes sparkling in awe, filled with the desire to follow his every command.

"Your loyalty is welcomed, sigilyph," he said, smirking again at the look of joy in the creature's eyes for merely being acknowledged. "You shall assist me as I regain my greatness. Your first task is to procure a more substantial body, that I may possess it."

The sigilyph bowed again before taking off, shaking with eagerness. "As you command...

Oh Great War King Ptolemy."

"Well," Axtron Grissom muttered, all 4 arms crossed, "that town was a complete waste of time."

Corporal marched confidently through the muck and marsh as he led his team through the swamps, paying no heed to the grumbling of the ledian buzzing at the back. True, the experience they underwent in Baltimare was one that he'd rather not relive (or even recount any time soon), but he was steadfast in his convictions that those foul, felonious phantoms had come this way!

...probably.

...maybe.

That part didn't matter! The important thing was finding their next clue, a lead to point them straight to the villains!

...which would be easier if it weren't for the fact that none of the natives of this world could understand him. Corporal's bitter scowl at the thought was hidden by his luxurious moustache as he contemplated the difficulties that lack of communication had caused; the stoutland could not even offer words of encouragement to his loyal young companion, Biscuits.

Corporal pondered on their conundrum, remembering the first time he'd encountered their quarry; the ghosts had brought a psychic-type with them, using the poor creature as a translator. Though the idea repulsed him, Corporal wondered if the fiends had been on to something...

"Yes!" The ghost hunter exclaimed, and he stopped short on a small patch of dry ground. He ignored the cries of indignant protest from the other two 'mons in his group, whirling around to share his epiphany.

"What's your stupid problem, skippy?!" Grissom grumbled gruffly.

Corporal raised a paw into the air. "If our quest is to succeed, we must present a unified front! We need to achieve understanding with one another, to overcome the cumbersome confines of our linguistic limitations! We need a psychic-type!"

"...what did he say?" Biscuits asked to no one in particular.

When Arceus had moved all the pokémon off of Earth, Machoke wasn't really fazed. When he figured out that switching worlds had made him evolve, Machamp was even a little happy. Machamp was a machamp of simple tastes; he liked eating, training, fighting, punching things, fighting, sleeping, and training, and having two extra arms made it a lot easier to punch things (although none of the rainbow ponyta had wanted to fight). When the message from Arceus told him not to punch the rainbow ponyta, Machamp shrugged his double shoulders and went to find some big rocks or something, eventually coming across a place called the 'badlands' that had plenty of stuff to punch. That had been really nice.

That had changed, though, when the psychic bird came for him; punching psychics was hard, and punching birds was even harder, so trying to punch both at once... It was not fun. It hadn't stopped Machamp from trying, but the pokémon (that he didn't recognize, and was probably from a different region) was fast to take him down, hypnotizing him as it said something about 'the mighty liege' and 'a fitting vessel for control.'

The last thing Machamp had felt was the cold chill of a ghost (a type he also hated fighting, since he couldn't punch them at all).

The last thing Machamp heard was a deep, powerful voice; one that scared him on a deep level he had never known about.

And the last thing Machamp saw...

Was blinding, shining platinum.

Sigilyph hovered anxiously, waiting for her master's decision on the vessel she had found for him. She watched as the great king tested the machamp's body, flexing his muscles and holding his four hands to the flawless platinum mask on his face. He rolled his second pair of arms in their sockets; they would likely take some getting used to, but such matters were no doubt trivial to a king as mighty as he.

As if to confirm her thought, her master plunged all four fists into a nearby boulder, striking again and again until he was left with two perfect staves of solid rock.

Finally, he spoke. "You have done well, sigilyph," he said, taking a staff each in his right hands, "this body will serve my conquest nicely; you have clearly grown in power, that you were able to subdue this pokémon's mind."

At these words, Sigilyph trembled in near ecstasy. Her king had praised her work!

"Anything for the mighty war king," she said, bowing before his majesty, "though the machamp's mind was simple, your glory could easily have suppressed it without my aid."

Suddenly, however, her prostration was disrupted as she detected four minds drawing close to their position.

"Great one," she spoke, rising, "forgive me for interrupting my praise of your might, but there is a small group very near to us; they are weak-minded and foolish, and they seek a psychic-type to join them."

Sigilyph watched with interest as the great king's mask contorted into a sinister smile. "Then I believe they shall find one."

Radi shook her head, clearing out a strange residual fog. What just happened? She remembered following Axtron as their ragtag group looked for a psychic-type, got lost, stumbled out into a desert-like area, and got lost again, but after that... nothing.

It was a few moments before the ariados realized what was going on in front of her. The stoutland, Corporal, was shaking paws/hands with a machamp, a sigilyph hovering nearby.

"It's great to have you both on our quest of justice," Corporal was saying. "Together, I'm sure we can take down those morbid miscreants and make this planet safer for pokémon and Equus-ites alike."

Radi squinted her almond-shaped bug eyes; was she seeing things, or did the machamp's face look strangely... lustrous? Then the sigilyph looked at her, and Radi almost felt an odd pressure on her brain, a foreign buzz reverberating through the venom in her mandibles. The sensation was over in an instant, almost before it had begun, and when the ariados looked up she saw a completely normal machamp.

"It is my pleasure to assist such a noble cause," the machamp replied, "and Sigilyph will gladly act as translator on our journey."

'It's just my imagination,' Radi thought. Or was that her thought? It almost felt like someone else spoke to her... 'No, it's definitely my imagination.'

Grissom buzzed up to the pair shaking hands, looking at the taller fighting-type. "So what's your name, bruto?"

The machamp smirked– no, smiled, meeting eyes with the ledian.

"You may call me King."

Author's Note

There is something rotten in the state of Unova...

The Narrative takes a chapter off to visit some non-ghost characters, but can it stave off its annoyance at our four wall-breakers in time for the next chapter?

Ooh, wait, I just got an idea; let's have the narrative take the next chapter off.

And how would we do that, Stein?

*whisper whisper whisper*

Hmm... Sure, why not?

Ch 1: Grim Grinning Ghost-Types

"Hey boss, the refrigerator's running again."

I sighed from my place on the couch. "Well then go and catch him, Lucius," I replied, not looking up from the ornate shield I was polishing, "and tell him that joke stopped being funny 2 months ago!"

"No it didn't!" a high-pitched synthetic-sounding voice echoed as a large orange refrigerator floated in through a tall doorway, "That joke will NEVER stop being funny!"

You're probably confused right now. Let me introduce myself: my name is Dante Amaranth, and I've dedicated my life to becoming the world's greatest ghost-type pokémon trainer and researcher. My team and I were staying at the "old abandoned mansion headquarters" I had commissioned with the money I'd saved over the course of the past year. (You'd be surprised at how many research grants I've gotten; not many scientists were willing to work with specters that haunt and torment the living, for some reason.) We were taking a well-deserved holiday to celebrate the fact that we finally finished building our old abandoned mansion headquarters. The place had everything: cobwebs, peeling wallpaper, fake dry rot...

Oh but you're still wondering about the fridge, aren't you? That's Tesla; it's a rotom, and our team's resident electronics expert. Like many ghost types, Tesla fancies itself to be a comedian. I must admit, he isn't that bad at it.

"Alright, alright," I chuckled, holding out my hand, "it is pretty funny. Pass me a soda would you?" A shadow passed through the fridge and a cold soda was pressed into my grip. "Thanks, Lucius." I popped the cap and kicked back a swig of fizzy refreshment, a sigh escaping my lips as I lowered the bottle.

"Any time, boss." Lucius, a gengar, was my right-hand 'mon; he'd been my starter way back at the start of my journey when he was just a gastly, and he'd always called me 'boss' from the time I'd first met him.

"Sire?" I turned my head to look at the sword sitting next to me on the couch. "Not to bother you, but..." A gleaming purple eye near the hilt motioned to the cloth I was holding. "Oh," I said, "sorry D." I went back to polishing the gleaming gold surface of the shield. "No trouble at all, Sire- ah, you missed a spot... There, you got it."

When I'd first met the aegislash next to me, he was a honedge who had refused a nickname until he fully evolved. After 3 weeks of training and 2 more weeks looking for a dusk stone, I christened him Sir Durendal, Knight of the Vorpal Order, or D for short.

"You're such a neat freak, D," I commented, rubbing off a stubborn bit of tarnish. "All due respect, Sire," he replied, looking back at me, "a knight prides himself on the gleam of his blade and shield as you pride yourself on the outlandishness of your crowns."

I readjusted my dark purple top hat self-consciously; so I have a penchant for eccentric haberdashery, it's not a problem. I can stop any time I want to.

I just don't want to.

"Let's see what's on TV," I said, eager to change the subject. I grabbed the remote and pressed the button, turning on the big screen. As the news station played its introduction, I reflected on how out-of-place the 30" plasma screen was in the otherwise decrepit-looking building.

"Reports indicate that the suspect escaped capture; suspect was confirmed to be repeat offender Gene-" a burst of static obscured the sound for a moment- "most infamous for his failed attempt to 'marry' his gardevoir last-" the sound cut off again, this time because I'd hit the mute button on the remote as I frowned.

"The extent of human ignorance disgusts me," came a voice from behind me, "interfering with the sacred bond between lovers." I turned, coming face to torso-face with a dusknoir. "Present company excluded, of course." I rolled my eyes, not out of disagreement, but because I knew the specter behind me was only here because he wanted something. "What is it, Thanos?"

Thanos was a member of the extended team; the team used more for research than for battle. Thanos was quite adept at combat, make no mistake, but he was much more useful outside of the field for one major fact.

"Have you seen Legion? I've found something of theirs." Thanos held out a wisp of ethereal smoke; it quivered from what looked to be burn marks, and an otherworldly whimpering emanated from it. I sighed, pointing towards the ceiling. "They were in the attic last time I saw them." The door suddenly burst open as 2 forms tumbled through; a chandelier with purple flames instead of candles was struggling against a mass of purple and green that seemed to be spewing from a cracked stone.

"THIEF! SHE HAS STOLEN IT FROM US! SHE MUST RETURN IT OR SUFFER!"

"I don't have your stupid soul, get off me!"

"Chandler! Legion! Stop it!" Both ghosts froze in place, hovering almost comically still in midair. "Legion," I started, "Thanos has found your missing soul." I motioned to the wisp in the dusknoir's hand; the purple aura hovered over, the cracked stone following.

As a spiritomb, Legion was the combined consciousness of 108 souls bound to a keystone; if any of them go missing, the rest tend to freak out. Thanos had the important job of stitching them back together when this happened, and it happened a fair deal more than I'd like.

I turned to the purple fire ghost with a stern look on my face. "Chandler," I admonished, crossing my arms, "What have I told you about eating souls, young lady?"

Chandler the chandelure (original name, I know) had been given to me by a fellow ghost enthusiast when she was just an egg, and had seen me as her father ever since she hatched just 6 months ago. She grew quickly, and so did her appetite.

Chandler turned a deeper purple I knew to be a blush. "You said to always ask nicely first, and only when uncle Thanos is there to put them back when I'm done," She said timidly. I nodded my head, still looking stern. "That's right. Now I believe you have something to say to Legion."

Chandler looked back to where Thanos has just finished returning the lost soul to Legion. "I'm sorry, Legion," she said, and Legion looked back at her. "We forgive this time," they spoke, 108 voices in unison, "but do not let it happen again, lest we subject you to the torment of a hundred lifetimes."

"Good enough, I guess," I shrugged a little wearily, "now go gather everyone else up, it's time for bed." I was met with a chorus of groans.

"Do we HAVE to, dad?"

"Yeah, come on boss, it's only 8:30."

"I'm still feeling pretty charged up, myself."

"Please, Sire, I've yet to dust my scabbard."

"We do not require sleep, master!"

"I was hoping I could finish reading that book, myself..."

"Now guys," I started, turning off the TV as I stood up, "we all need to be good and rested when we go to those ruins tomorrow; no one will join us if we don't make a good first impression." I placed my hat on the hat stand as I passed by, wiping off a bit of dust.
In all my travels from Kanto to Kalos, I had gotten 1 of every ghost-type to join me in my journey. All, that is, except for one; I had yet to find a yamask that wanted to join me in my quest to explore the mysteries of ghost pokémon. It was for that reason we were headed out to the recently uncovered sector of ruins near Unova's desert resort, hoping to find - if you'll pardon the pun - a kindred spirit.

As my team and I all headed off to sleep, we were unaware that our journey tomorrow would bring us to places we had never imagined- none of which were the ruins of Unova.

Rest now my children, for when you awake a whole new world shall be your home.

Author's Note

So what do you think? I haven't really put too much thought into this past the first chapter, and I'll gladly take suggestions; I still need to decide if they'll encounter specific ponies or if I should have an OC tag along. It would also be very helpful if anyone would point out errors I've made in the grammar or spelling.

Fair warning: updates for this story may be sporadic and far-between, depending entirely on my motivation and how bad my writer's block is at any given moment of the day.

Ch 4: Making Friends on the Other Side

Deep in the Everfree Forest, the ruins of a time long past lay silent, waiting for a brave adventurer to plumb its depths and discover its secrets-

"Whoops!"
SMACK

Yeah who am I kidding, I'm totally lost. Ancient drink recipes should NOT be this hard to find.

Groaning from a face plant on a hard marble platform, a unicorn pushed himself to his hooves. Readjusting the goggles on his face, the stallion checked himself over- white lab coat over chartreuse fur, purple boots with gold buckles, light grey mane and tail with a fancy black moustache, lightly whimsical purple bow tie and top hat, and a cutie mark displaying a foaming tankard being circled by 3 ghostly wisps. Nodding, he looked at the ground behind him.

"What manner of object dares to impede the progress of Professor Frothing Stein, Master of Spirits?" A gleaming silver platter lay on the ground. "Ooh, something shiny!"

Frothing picked up the shining--

Please, call me Stein. Or Professor.

Stein was met with silence as the narrative seemed to glare at him.

Oh, sorry. Please, continue the story.

...Stein picked up the round, shining silver plate in an aura of purple magic, examining it as he turned it over.

Actually this looks more like platinum. And judging by the markings on the other side, I'd say this is a mask, not a plate.

The stallion's head jerked to the side as he was smacked across the face by an invisible force.

Alright, alright, you don't have to be rude about it!

However, as strands of darkness coalesced into being, snatching the platinum mask out if his magical grasp, Frothing Stein realized that it was not the narrative who had slapped him.

"Insolent mortal!" Came a voice from the ethereal creature before him, "Touch not the face of Queen Banafrit, Empress of a Thousand Lifetimes!"

Stein was, for his part, rubbing the spot on his cheek where he'd been slapped, staring wide-eyed at the shadowy being. "Zounds," he said, readjusting his crooked goggles, "a revenant! A specter! A phantom! A... What's the word..."

"Did you not hear me?! I have powers from beyond the grave that you cannot hope to comprehend! Bow before me or--"

"I'm sorry, Ms. Ghost, but I cannot understand a word you're saying." Stein held up a hoof as his horn began to glow. "Give me a moment, I know a translator spell." There was a brief flash and an audible *ding* as the spell was cast. "Now, you were saying?"

The ghost seemed to have switched emotions from 'outraged' to 'confused'. "As I said, I am Queen Banafrit," she intoned, still with some confidence. "What sort of pokémon are you?"

"Well it's quite obvious; I am the BEST sort of pokémon."

A pause.

"Actually, what exactly is a pokémon?"

And, as a long series of explanations began, a pair of red eyes darted away into the forest unseen.

Lucius was very excited as he rushed back to our group; he'd found some of the locals, and they seemed primed for questioning.

"Let's get there quick, I think they're still talking!"

We swerved through the forest and arrived at the ruins just in time to hear the tail end of a sentence.

"...but you should know all of this; pokémon are prevalent all throughout Earth, unless times have changed drastically since my awakening..."

I decided that now would be as good a time as any to interject. "I beg your pardon," I called as I floated into the open, "my comerades and I are lost." The others took this as their cue to reveal their presence as well. "Could one of you please tell us where we are?"

Both individuals turned to look at me; the first one looked to be some sort of... Mutant rapidash perhaps? Maybe it was an undiscovered species of pokémon. It garnered my full attention as it started to speak.

"Good heavens," it said, and I guessed from the voice that it was male, "another spirit! And a shade! And a gremlin! And... A pumpkin?"

"My good sir," I interrupted, "those directions, please?"

"Of course." At this he faltered, and put a hoof to his chin. "Well I was just about to tell the lady spirit here that the short-lived city-kingdom of Earth dissolved centuries ago, almost right after it was founded, and I have never heard anything about 'pokémon' in relation to it."

I tilted my head, confused by his words. "She probably meant Earth the planet, not the... Whatever you said."

This seemed to confuse the strange not-rapidash even further. "This is the planet Equus."

Now, learning that one has not only died, but also been sent to another planet, would cause many people and pokémon alike to worry, if not panic. Before I could decide if I was one of them, however, I found myself wrapped in another enthusiastic hug.

"Dan, buddy! We're aliens!"

That was half an hour ago. In the time since, the so-called 'pony' had introduced himself as Professor Frothing Stein, and that we should please call him 'Stein' or 'Professor'. I had been completely focused on him as he went on to explain that we were in the land of equestria, ruled by the two princesses that controlled the sun and moon, and yes of course he was serious, and yes he'd been drinking recently, he was a brewmaster, but that didn't have anything to do with their conversation, and yes he did have a magnificent moustache, thank you for noticing.

It was only when he realized that oh, how rude of him, he forgot to introduce the lady spirit, that I remembered the other yamask I had barely taken notice of.

"I believe her name was Banana Fritter?"

"I am QUEEN BANAFRIT, not banana fritter!"

The yamask turned to me and-- oh.

Oh my.

She had the most beautiful face I had ever laid eyes on, its perfection only magnified by the shine of the platinum in which it was set. Even now I cannot find words to describe her beauty, and no painting or sketch could ever hope to emulate her divine beauty.

Oh mighty Arceus, I thought, Oh gracious Cresselia, a thousand blessings to your names, for you have delivered unto me an angel!

In a word, she was right purty.

"And who might you be?" She asked, eyeing me with an unreadable expression.

I steeled my resolve, I had to make a good first impression.

"Hi." I said.

Right, I'm terrible with people. That's why I live in a haunted house surrounded by the undead.

Thankfully, Lucius and Durendal werethere to help. "What his highness means to say is that he is the Grand Duke Dante Amaranth, master of ghost-types." Durendal made a grand sweeping motion towards me.

"The prince of poltergeists," added Lucius, "the pharao of phantasms, the sultan of spooks! And he's also single."

Queen Banafrit raised an eyebrow. "You are royalty as well?" She asked, seemingly intrigued.

"Indeed," replied Durendal, "and I am Sir Durendal, Knight of the Vorpal Order."

Lucius moved to introduce the rest of the group. "This is Jack, chief of celebratory affairs, and Ravid, our um... Treasurer." He gestured to himself. "And I am Lucius, his excellency's advisor and his personal shadow. I mean that last part literally." He sank into my shadow as if to prove his point.

"Well then,Grand Duke," said the queen, floating up to me with a seductive smile on her face, "you may call me Bunny." She ran a ghostly finger down the side of my mask and winked at me.

For a dead man, my heart was beating remarkably fast.

I was almost grateful when Frothing Stein reminded us of his presence. "If I may," he spoke, gesturing toward the horizon, "the sun is rising; we'd best get going now if we want to make it through the Everfree Forest and to the nearest town."

Author's Note

And Lo, our heroes didst find themselves accompanied by a most peculiar new ally from this strange world upon which they had awoken. And what of this queen? Dost she seeketh only an alliance, or something more... Intimate?

Also, does it feel like I'm rushing through this?

Ch 7: Dante's Moving 'Castle'

It was late; everyone had gathered in the 'unliving room' and were sat down on the large wraparound sofa, discussing the situation over the coffee table. They were throwing around ideas on how the pokémon got there, and it was currently Frothing Stein's turn to present a theory.

"You know, it's entirely possible that none of you are real, and that I'm hallucinating terribly from years of inhaling and imbibing various unstable chemicals. And alcohol."

"I think you'd have died by then," said Lucius, "I'd know; I'm an expert on chemical safety."

"Oh I'm not too certain; I have lungs of steel and a cast-iron liver." Stein thumped a hoof against his chest as he said this, and there was actually a faint clanging noise. "Did the whole process myself."

"Even the transplant?"

"Yes, that was the difficult part. It's a funny story actually; I was prepping for surgery when a cantaloupe of all things--"

"Attention citizens of Equus, both old and new.”

"Oh, that sounds important."

The group then listened as a nigh-omnipotent god-creature spoke to the entire planet.

“Goodbye for now, though I doubt this will be the last you hear of me, and peace to you all.”

There was dead silence all around the room, all occupants stunned as they processed the information. Frothing Stein was the first to speak, trying to cut the tension.

"Well that was certainly informative. As I was saying, though; this cantaloupe--"

Stein's words were quickly drowned out as everyone started talking at once.

"Lord Arceus is free?!"

"Everfree forest? That's where we are, right?"

"Hippo-whatnow?"

"SILENCE!" A voice commanded, louder than all others, an the room was quiet once more as everyone faced the source of the voice; it was Queen Banafrit, hovering next to Dante in the middle of the sofa.

"Thanks, Bunny," said Dante, before addressing the room out loud. "Alright everyone; although the information came from an... Unexpected source, we have our answer on how we got here. The meeting, however, is still in session, so let's move on to the next question: How did our house get here?"

Tesla, back in default form, raised a glowing appendage.

"I submit the theory that the house was mistakenly thought as being a pokémon because there was a rotom (namely me) sleeping in the electrical system."

Dante blinked.

Tesla blinked back.

"Alright sure," said Dante, putting a ghostly hand to his temple, "let's go with that." He sighed. "I'm calling a ten minute recess; I need a drink. Goliath, you come with me."

Dante floated out of the room alone, the rest of the group sitting somewhat awkwardly.

Lucius took it upon himself to break the silence this time. "So Stein, you were saying about a cantaloupe?"

"Oh yes; now I personally never eat cantaloupe, so I had no idea where this one had come from..."

I came back 10 minutes later just in time to hear the tail end of a story.

"...and, suffice to say, when the mayor's council asked me why the fire station was encased in a cube of pineapple gelatin, I told them 'I was out of lime flavor!'"

"But why did that giraffe need an eggbeater?"

"Attention, everyone!" I called, "recess is now over; we're moving on to the next item on the agenda."

I took an object from behind my back and placed it on the table with a little more force than necessary.

"Gentleghosts (and Bunny)," I said as all eyes were fixed on the object, "this...is a bucket."

Gasps erupted from the room.

"Sweet Celestia..." murmured Frothing Stein.

"There's more."

"No..." Stein leaned back in disbelief.

"This bucket," I continued, "contains information on all of our missing comerades."

I motioned to Goliath, who wheeled a large whiteboard behind me. I placed various photographs from the bucket onto the board before continuing.

"We are going to search this planet until we find every last one of them. Stein informed me earlier of a town just outside this forest; Goliath and I went there to find and procure a map." I flipped the whiteboard over, revealing said map on the other side.

"Wait," Stein interrupted, "you went to ponyville, found a map, and brought it back here all in the space of ten minutes?"

"Yes, I did."

"That was awfully fast."

"Goliath can fly."

"He can--"

"NO FURTHER QUESTIONS!"

Stein sank back in his seat.

"While in town," I continued, turning to the map, "I was also able to determine that none of our missing friends were there. It is therefore my professional opinion that the closest area likely to have ghost-types in or around it is the secluded town of Hollow Shades. That's where we're going next." I faced the room at large. "Are there any questions?"

A clawed purple hand was raised. "Ravid has question!"

"No you cannot have the bucket."

Ravid lowered his hand, looking downcast.

"I have a question, my king."

"Yes, Bunny?"

Bunny looked at the bucket, confused. "What is the fixation with this bucket?"

Jack popped up next to her. "Inside joke, queenie; Dan buddy can probably tell you later."

Jack was quickly pulled away from Bunny by Durendal, who had started shaking again. The queen shot them a look before turning back to me.

"I also wish to know how we are to travel to this 'Hollow Shades', and the rest of this planet."

I grinned. "I was hoping you'd ask that." I pointed to Tesla. "Chief engineer Tesla, engage protocol W-9-tango-blue!"

Tesla grinned wide and gave a salute, then phased through the floor with a chipper "Jawohl, mein kapitän!"

Biscuits was on a mission; the diamond dogs had lost a whole pile of gems, and Rover had blamed it on him for finding those cursed shinies. The rest had responded by throwing Biscuits out of the pack and chasing him into the bad forest, leaving him to wander alone while he ran into freaky... things he'd never seen before. The only good thing that happened to him was when he found a weird new friend who said they could lead him to the shinies, and Biscuits wanted to make the stupid shinies pay for getting him thrown out of the pack.

"Do you still have the scent, Corporal?"

Biscuits' new friend nodded and trudged through the forest. Corporal was the weirdest diamond dog biscuits had ever seen; he had shaggy dark blue and grey fur over most of his body, and it was long enough to touch the ground. His head had brown fur, and his face had huge fluffy cream fur eyebrows that almost covered his eyes, but Corporal's biggest feature was his jowls, which sported the longest, poofiest moustache Biscuits could have imagined.

"Slow down, corporal!" Biscuits called as he struggled to keep up with the furry dog. Corporal stopped for a moment as Biscuits fought his way through some bushes before taking off again without a word. That was another thing about Corporal that confused Biscuits; he never talked, and Biscuits only called him Corporal because the dog had shrugged when Biscuits had guessed his name.

Before long, Corporal and Biscuits arrived at a clearing; in the middle of the clearing there was a large dingy-looking mansion. Corporal nudged Biscuits in the side, pointing at the mansion with his snout. "Shinies are in there?" Asked Biscuits, and Corporal nodded in reply.

Before either canine could make a move, however, the roof of the mansion opened up with a pneumatic hiss. Biscuits and Corporal watched, amazed, as a giant purple hot air balloon came out of the top, and the mansion began to float through the air.

The sight was so fantastic that it took Biscuits a full minute before he realized the house was floating away.

"AFTER THEM!" He shouted, and both dogs dashed off, rushing to keep up with their quarry.

Author's Note

I was initially going to have the diamond dogs only make one appearance, but I realized that'd be dumb while writing this chapter. However I have limited that sub-plot to just one OC dog; Rover, Fido and Spot will not be reappearing.

Tune in next chapter as we take a break for some good old-fashioned character interaction.