The Mane 6 Visit a Strip Club

by Bonk

Rating: mature
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Other, Sex, Twilight Sparkle, Main 6
Length: 19500

The Mane 6 visit a local strip club for the first time.

In celebration for Twilight's 25th birthday, Rainbow Dash convinces the girls that going to the local strip joint is a good idea. The Mane 6's initial reactions to the new environment and their encounters with everyday Ponyville folk lead to some very interesting conversations. Then they actually start "partaking" in the strip club's "activities". You know where this is going.

Don't blame me, it's your own damn curiosity.

Collaboration with Silverlinings.

Published 2014-09-16 02:20:07 UTC
Last updated 2015-02-01 18:36:10 UTC

A Body Itself Can Be As Magical As Friendship, Especially When It's Being Enjoyed With Friends.

Twilight Sparkle and her friends laughed and played the silly party games Pinkie Pie had prepared for them. Although Twilight was turning twenty five, she and her friends still enjoyed the little filly games such as pin the tail on the pony and musical chairs. Well, almost all of them were enjoying their selves. Rainbow Dash played the games with her friends but gave hardy, bored sighs in doing so.

"Uuuuuugh..." the cyan mare huffed as she sat in a chair at the end of a round of musical chairs.

"What's wrong, Rainbow?" Applejack, who was in charge of the music, asked.

"Yeah, don't you like my games, Dashie?" Pinkie gave large, tearful eyes and a quivering lip.

"Of course, Pinkie," Rainbow answered. "It's just.. aren't we getting a bit old for this? I mean, Twi's turning twenty five, and the rest of us are either older than her, or not too far behind."

"Yeah, so?" Pinkie wasn't sure what age had to do with anything. To her, it was just a number.

"Well," Rainbow thought for a moment, "not that your parties aren't the best, Pinkie, but why don't we go out and do something a little more... age appropriate?" She gave a hopeful smile to her friends.

Her friends looked back and forth at each other, reading the mixed emotions in their eyes. After some time, Rarity spoke for the group.

"Alright, Darling," She smiled at Rainbow Dash, "but where can we indulge ourselves in entertainment meant for our age group?"

Dash rubbed her jaw, thinking. "Well..." She began, "I do know one place... but..."

"But what?" Twilight inquired.

"It's only open at night," Rainbow responded, "So we'll have to go later."

"Alright, we can wait," Twilight said with a smile. She had absolutely no idea what she and her friends had just gotten into.

After a few more hours of playing party games, it was about to reach 8 o' clock and they were all just as energetic as they started the party. However, after another round of hide-and-seek and no one being able to find Pinkie, again, they were all getting bored of party games. With this newfound boredom, Twilight remembered the conversation from earlier, and decided to bring it up again.

"Hey Rainbow, do you think the place you were talking about earlier is open now?" Twilight questioned. Rainbow looked up at the clock.

"Yeah, it should be. Are you guys ready?" Rainbow answered.

"Wait, shouldn't we clean up first?" Twilight said.

"Don't worry about it, guys. I'll clean up later," Pinkie replied.

"I reckon' we're as ready as we'll ever be. Let's get a move on then, Rainbow," Applejack added in.

With that, they left Sugarcube Corner and headed on their way to the red-light district.

Rainbow Dash and her friends stood out, in front of the glitzy building. Large, red and pink neon lights flashed on the front, spelling out "The Pink Pony," with large X's surrounding it. This was a strip club. Twilight and Rarity blushed at the realization that Rainbow had brought them to such a promiscuous play pen, where the exotic and the erotic collide. Applejack had to take her hat off and hide her face, she was blushing so hard, and Fluttershy nearly passed out. Pinkie didn't seem to understand and was giddy with anticipation instead.

"Oh boy!" She cried. "Who knew there was a place named after me?!"

"Uhh, Rainbow Dash...?" Twilight was slowly backing away from the entrance. "Maybe we should try somewhere else..."

"Nope," Dashie replied, sternly, "We're here now, so don't knock it 'til you try it." She began pushing the other five in one large group through the front doors.

They were met with quite the sight: greeting patrons at the door was none other than every ponies' least favorite piece of royal ass.

"Prince Blueblood!?" Twilight, Rarity and AJ cried in unison.

"May I help you?" Blueblood was only wearing a blue bow tie, and a matching banana hammock. He did not seem to recognize Rarity from the Grand Galloping Gala. He did, however, recognize Rainbow Dash. "Oh, Miss Rainblow! Your usual booth?" Blueblood asked, trotting up to her.

The others gave her a look between afraid, surprised, and curious.

"Uh, yeah, that'll be fine." Rainbow was blushing slightly and giving a worried smile.

"Alright, Booth #15." Blueblood was scribbling down something on a note pad.

As the six ponies made their way though the rows of booths, most of which had closed curtains, Twilight had to ask. "Why did he call you "Rainblow"? And why is he working here in the first place?"

"It's just a nickname, and you'd be surprised who works here." Rainbow slid into Booth #15. It sat in the corner of the establishment, and its seat almost made a complete circle around a large, round table, with a pole coming out of the center. The other ponies began filing in, before Dash pulled the curtain shut.

"Now then," She grabbed a book off of the table, "Let's see who's working tonight."

All of the ponies seemed to have gotten over the initial embarrassment except Fluttershy, who still hadn't woken up from her previous fainting. Nopony seemed to want to talk however, and silence carried over the table.

Rainbow had had her turn inspecting the list in the book, hadn't seen anyone interesting in her tastes, and had passed the book to the birthday mare, telling her it was her special day and she should choose, an excuse to watch her reactions to the names in the book. She was reacting surprisingly well, not saying anything except for the occasional 'oh' or 'huh', until she suddenly tensed up at reading one name, something that drew the attention of everypony at the table. She didn't keep reading, simply staring at the name, until someone spoke up.

"What is it, dear? Who did you... find?" Rarity asked, somewhat afraid of the answer she'd get. Twilight didn't answer however, too focused on the words on the page to even listen to her friends around her.

"Lemme see," Rainbow Dash said while leaning over Twilight's shoulder, trying to follow her eyes to the name. She quickly realized who she was looking at. "Oh. I forgot about... her." Rainbow Dash said with a seemingly apologetic tone.

"Who is it? Wait, lemme guess!" Pinkie said excitedly. "Colgate? Ms. Cheerilee? Apple Bloom? Uhhh, Mayor Mare?" She listed off excitedly, about to continue on when Applejack put a hoof over her mouth.

"Who is it, Rainbow?" Applejack asked, somewhat ticked off at Pinkie for calling her little sis a possible "performer", but more worried about her friend prone to anxiety attacks across the table who hadn't said a word in the past few minutes.

Instead of answering with words, Twilight levitated the book across the table to AJ, with Pinkie leaning over her shoulder trying to see it, too. One name was surrounded by a Twilight's purplish glow of magic. AJ read the name to herself, but Pinkie read it out loud for everyone to hear.

"The Horny and Pleasurable Trixie?"

Feeling that the special birthday girl deserved a special birthday gift, Rainbow ordered Twilight the sensual mare (who wasn't cheap, mind you) who had caught her attention. The curtains were quickly thrown back, seemingly by themselves. A blue mare stepped, gracefully into the booth. She wore a cape and a pointed hat. She eyed each mare in the booth, surprised to see that these... particular mares... took to this form of... entertainment. She didn't show her shock and instead began to carry out the instructions Rainbow Dash had given her, for when the unicorn arrived. She glanced at Twilight with a cute smile, and proceeded to straddle her. Twilight's face went a new shade of red that, if this wasn't fictional, would've caused every other pony's head to explode, because there minds couldn't process a new hue in their spectrum.

"Trixie? What are you..." Twilight started, but trailed off. One of Twilight's least favorite mares in all of Equestria had just casually sat on her lap, without saying even a single word. It was at this point Trixie slowly took her cape off, revealing she was wearing nothing more than a tight black leather thong. She turned around in Twilight's lap and started grinding against Twilight slowly with a certain sway and rhythm.

Rainbow Dash just smiled to herself, pleased at what she had done. She thought Twilight's blush was cute, and she could also tell that Twi was enjoying it, at least a little. The other four had absolutely no words for what was happening. As soon as the grinding started, Rarity got light headed and almost passed out like Fluttershy had done earlier. Speaking of the yellow pegasus, she was redder than a sunburned Big Mac. Applejack had to set her hat on her lap, to cover the quivering lips between the hips. Pinkie was staring rather creepily at the performance. Trixie's hip rotations were... mesmerizing... but at the same time disturbing.

Trixie looked behind her to see Twilight looking right at her ass. "Like what you see?" This was the first thing Trixie had said, upon her arrival. Twilight's eyes widened at the realization that she was enjoying this. She pursed her lips, fighting the urge to smile. Trixie smirked, and stopped the grinding. She hopped up onto the table and sat on the edge, a back hoof on either side of Twilight. She leaned back and looked at Twilight, thinking of what to do next. After some time, she finally asked the mare if she wanted anything in particular.

Twilight hesitantly looked the blue mare up and down, fantasizing about all the things she could do. It was at this point Twilight noticed something she hadn't before. Something... twitched. She had to look again to make sure she had seen it correctly. This was hard for her to do, considering the movement in question came from between Trixie's legs. Twilight glanced down at what she at first thought was the unicorn's marehood... but... It was a bit too large of a bulge to be a marehood...

Twilight's brain was going at supersonic speeds trying to process the new info in her head. Twilight Sparkle, Celestia's prized protégé, was at a strip club on her birthday with her 5 closest friends, getting a lap dance by her... her... she tried to find the word, and settled with rival, Trixie Lulamoon, who she just found out was a...

Surprisingly, Twilight's brain was only caught on one detail of her situation; how had she NOT known about Trixie's... condition, before?! Sure, she might have usually wore a cape and hat, but nothing around her private parts to hide them.

Was it just because she had never tried paying attention to Trixie's 'area' before? She was used to naked ponies living in Equestria, so she didn't usually even bother checking them out, with nothing really "new" to see. Of course, she might check out certain stallions that caught her eye from time to time, but not blatantly.

But how in Tartarus had she not noticed this until now!?

When she finally refocused herself into the world of her surroundings, she found herself looking eye to eye with the blue mare, a playful, seductive smile on her face.

"I see someone's enjoying the Great and Powerful Trixie in more ways than one, hmm?" Trixie said, breaking the ice between the two. Twilight simply nodded, too involved for her mouth to form words. She felt something inside her rising with a certain heat she hadn't felt in a very long time, but showed no signs of it.

"Submissive, hmm? What is it, Twilight? Is it your..." Trixie bent over to Twilight's ear, "first?" Trixie whispered, then returned to her normal sitting position with a large, mocking smile, both legs splayed in front of the lavender unicorn. Trixie picked up on the unicorn's inexperience to the situation, and decided to use it against her like she usually did with new clients, teasing them relentlessly.

All the while Twilight's inner heat was rising with every action performed by the performer in front of her. Everything from the seductive, mocking tone Trixie used to the slight movement of her tail between her legs hinting at the prize being hidden away was driving the inner Twilight crazy. Twilight was a mare and knew how to control her heat accordingly in public, but in this situation her inner sexual needs were winning the war of willpower.

Trixie found Twilight's silence unexpected, yet refreshing. She was used to the same old drunkards that had no will or surprise at all, just bending to her will and spewing raunchy comments the entire time. This was far too fun. The unicorn that made her a laughing stock in front of the whole town with an Ursa Minor was now just sitting quiet and speechless in front of all her friends because of her.

Trixie took a moment to examine the rest of the ponies watching the show. Rainblow Dash, a name she had learned about all too well, was sitting to her right with a small smirk, clearly enjoying the view. On the other side of Twilight was a yellow pegasus that was a shade of red that tomatoes aspired to have. She was facing down the table at her hooves and mumbling to herself very quietly, trying to ignore what's going on a few feet away. Next to her was a pink earth pony that seemed rather intrigued with what was happening, looking between Trixie and Twilight and trying to figure out what was happening, a complete contrast to the adjacent earth pony who was using a hat to cover her privates with a shameful look on her face.

She let her curiosity take control instead of focusing on the purple mare in front of her and turned her head to look at the gleaming, white-coated unicorn directly behind her. She was surprised to see quick movement of the unicorn's head towards the floor with a blush growing on her cheeks, confirming her suspicions. She HAD been staring at her ass. Trixie chuckled a little at the thought. Why be bashful? It's why you're here. Oh well, wasn't any of her business.

As she turned her head to return to her previous target, she felt something grip her head and pull her forward. Before she knew what was happening, her eyes and lips locked onto the lavender unicorn in front of her, with reactions coming from everypony at the table.

The two ponies sat in a deep, passionate lip lock, their tongues dancing around one another. Trixie slowly wrapped her legs around Twilight's waist. Dashie giggled a little at the sight. Pinkie had a shit eating grin on, as though to say, 'I FUCKIN' KNEW THIS WOULD HAPPEN!' Rarity actually fainted before Fluttershy, both of whom were breathing so fast they hyperventilated. AJ bit her lower lip and stared at the hot mess of intertwined ponies before her.

She was sweating profusely before saying, "Y'know, we c'n leave, if y'all need any... privacy..."

Trixie broke away from Twilight and turned to the orange mare. " No, it's fine. I'm actually done here. That's all the time Rainbow Dash paid for." She got up to leave, but whispered into Twilight's ear before she left, "But I can still see you later. Then I can show you why the call me, 'Great and Powerful'..." With that, The Horny and Pleasurable Trixie made her exit.

"Alright," Rainbow Dash grabbed the folder once more, "who else we got?" She skimmed through the names. Carrot Top? Naw, she was probably busy. She was pretty popular. Noteworthy? No. Again, he was popular. He could do this amazing thing with his tongue. Like, HOT DAMN! Anyway... Thunderlane? Hmm... maybe later.

After a few more minutes of searching, she found the pony she was looking for. Rarity loved outfits right? Then who better to entertain her, than a mare in a very sexy outfit: The Lovely Nurse Redheart.

Rainbow Dash ordered the lovely mare to the table, but there would be a 15 minute wait time as she was already in service. Instead of ordering another, The Mane 6 decided to simply wait for her availability.

Things were getting interesting at the table due to the recent "happenings" with their last performer. Twilight was looking down below the table at the floor, a bright red blush on her cheeks. Rainbow Dash was looking down on her with a smirk on her face, laughing to herself. Twilight might've normally been the most intelligent and reserved of the six, but no mare was safe from the heat.

Fluttershy was simply glancing from pony to pony at the table, waiting for someone to say something. Her coat seemed to be returning to its normal yellow color instead of the bright crimson she and Rarity had been sporting earlier. Speaking of the fashionista, she was now looking down at her front hooves in disgust. Sometime in the last 20 minutes at the club, she had stepped in some gum that was now attached to her left hoof with no signs of coming off. She yanked the resilient gum with her magic, and with some effort, the sticky pink offender flew off of her limb and straight onto her face, eliciting a scream that caused her friends to clamp onto their ears in pain and brought two bouncers onto the scene with surprising speed. A terrible explanation and a wadded up piece of bubblegum candy later sent the bouncers away grumbling, about a grown mare screaming over a piece of gum.

Needless to say, Rarity was still blushing, but not because of her location anymore.

Pinkie now had the menu in her hooves, observing the options for herself and spitting out a sentence every now and then with some of the performers. It became rather awkward when the mare found one performer in particular named Cheese Deluxe, but was quickly skipped over just like the others. AJ just sat next to her with her hat remaining between her hips, with no intention of removing it anytime soon. A cowpony may enjoy a little "fun" every once in a while, but this was ridiculous!

The table remained the same for a few minutes before a stallion that only Rainbow Dash recognized approached the table.

"Sorry to disturb you mares, but I've been told to come tell you Ms. Redheart won't be able to attend to you tonight," the stallion said.

"What? Why the hay not?" Rainbow replied, disappointed and angry.

"Sorry Rainblow, but during her last session one of the customers wanted, ahem, a more 'realistic' nurse experience," the stallion answered, receiving a confused, questioning look from not only Rainbow, but the whole Mane 6.

The stallion sighed. "Well, the customer asked to be injected with a needle. Strange, I know, but it's not the first time Ms. Redheart has been asked to do something of the sort before, but..." He trailed off, obviously not wanting to continue, but the looks of the mares around the table forced him to continue. "When she normally uses the needles, they don't actually have any liquid inside. Usually just the feeling of the needle entering the skin and a small compression of the needle is enough, so nothing is used for the safety of customers. However when she placed the needle in and pushed, a small amount of some unknown liquid entered his system."

The mares gasped, and looks of worry appeared on their faces. The element of kindness spoke up, the motherly instincts coming out.

"Is the customer ok?" Fluttershy asked.

"Well, we're not sure. Nurse Redheart got to work instantly and took him to the hospital. I wouldn't be sure of anything though at this point, because right as she was taking him outside, he started babbling something about Celestia. I don't know what, though." Faces all around started changing; some worried, some confused, and some returning to normal.

"But, I suppose there is one silver lining to all this. Well, at least for you ponies," the stallion added in, once again capturing the attention of the Mane Six.

"And just what would that be?" Rainbow spoke up.

"Well, since you already ordered Ms. Redheart and she left, you get to order another as compensation. C'mon, you should know this, Rainblow," the stallion said, being much more casual with the last sentence, snickering a little.

"Can you stop calling me that in front of my friends, Crescent?" Rainbow snarled, making her friends all the more curious.

"Whatever you say, Dashie. Just hurry up and order." The menu was now in the possession of Rarity, who was scanning the list quite closely, but as soon as the words left Crescent's mouth, she put down the menu and pointed at one name in particular.

"This one, please." Rarity stated quite confidently. The stallion examined the name, wrote it down, and turned to leave.

"Your order will be here in a moment," He said as he left. As soon as he left, all attention turned to Rarity.

"Who did you order?" Rainbow and Twilight both said at once, each for a different reason. Rainbow didn't want her friends to meet some of the performers here, and Twilight didn't want another awkward encounter with a pony she knew too well.

She wouldn't be the one having an awkward experience, however. As soon as the words came out, a familiar voice came in from the club with a southern accent to boot.

"Hiya, cousin! I didn't know you came to places like this!"

Buck me. Applejack thought.

Every pony was speechless. Braeburn?! Why Braeburn?! What did Rarity have going on in her head?!

The white unicorn sat, a small smile on her blushing face. She had always had a thing for the Apples; always so muscular, so chiseled, so... hot! This was finally her chance to see what the Apples were capable of 'after hours.' She was about to start her work with Braeburn, when AJ piped up.

"Oh hell naw!" Applejack got up, and put her hat back on. She shuddered a little, realizing how... sticky... it was. "Braeburn Apple! I know you're a fully grown stallion and ya can do what ya please, but I won't stand f'r this!" She climbed up and over the table, bit onto Braeburn's ear, and began dragging him out of the establishment.

"OW! Hey, I was only doin' it f'r the extra bits," he pleaded.

"Don't wanna hear it!" AJ yelled back, through the ear in her mouth. "Just you wait 'til Granny Smith get's an earful o' this! She's gonna whip you good, boy! Though I s'ppose it wouldn't be your first whippin'!"

The five other ponies stared, in shock as the orange pony dragged her cousin out of the cat house... and right into the dog house.

Dashie shrugged. One down. Four to go. She picked the folder back up and flipped through the pages. She looked around the table, until she spotted her next target: Fluttershy was really quite. Nothing new there, but this could be for... different reasons. Rainbow, began skimming through at higher speeds, looking for some pony in particular, for the shy little pegasus. Where is she? She's really good with the shy ones. She goes all slow and stuff. Finally she found who she was looking for: The lovely, Sweet as Honey Sweetie Drops, A.K.A. Bon Bon.

Well, those dreams were smashed quickly as the mares learned that Honey Sweetie Drops wasn't working tonight. She had taken off tonight to spend a little time with her marefriend, and couldn't be expected to be in until tomorrow night.

Rainbow Dash sighed angrily as she picked up the menu for what seemed like the millionth time that night. With that thought, she wondered what time it was. While she could care less about what time she got home, she knew her friends might not. She had already made a personal limit to midnight, if not earlier.

"Hey Twi, what time is it?" Rainbow Dash asked as she flipped the page.

"Uhh... it's 10:30. Why?" Twilight responded.

"No reason," Rainbow Dash said quickly.

"Oh dear, 10:30? I need to get home. I don't want to have my animal friends worrying about me at this time of night," Fluttershy said, urging Pinkie Pie to move out of the way.

"I'm afraid I need to go as well, darlings," Rarity added in. "While it's been an... interesting night, I really need to return home. I need to finish some dresses tomorrow, and I need to check on Sweetie Belle. I already told her I might be late getting home and she needed to get in bed at 9, but I still worry."

"Oh, come on!" Rainbow exclaimed. "One more! Then we can all go home." Despite her attempts, the two already had their mind set on leaving, soon to be joined by a third.

"I better get going to. I don't want Spike staying up, eating all the ice cream again. Last time, he ended up eating 56 bits worth, and I do NOT wanna have to go through that again," Twilight said before rising from the table and accompanying the white unicorn and butterscotch pegasus.

"Really, that's it?" Rainbow said with obvious annoyance. The three mares nodded their heads, and headed towards the door. In defeat, the cyan pegasus began to get up and join her friends, but a powerful tug jerked her around to face the remaining pink earth pony.

"Where ya going, Dashie?" Pinkie Pie said with her customary innocent grin on her face.

"Going," Rainbow simply said before turning around to go again. Once again though, she was spun around to face the surprisingly strong earth pony.

"But Dashie, you said one more," Pinkie whined with a growing frown on her face. RD was shocked, nonetheless.

"Really, Pinkie? You don't wanna go too?" Rainbow asked.

"Not really. I don't have to get up in the morning. I don't start my shift at Sugarcube Corner until two tomorrow. Plus, it looked really fun when Twilight was doing it!"

Rainbow simply chuckled and slipped back into the round table with Pinkie.

"Never thought you'd like something like this. Not that I'm complaining," Rainbow Dash said with a sort of happiness growing inside.

"Why'd you think that, Dashie?" Pinkie asked.

Rainbow opened her mouth to speak, then realized she didn't know why she would think that. Sure, her friends might be innocent and all, but Pinkie... well, Pinkie's different. Really, nothing should ever be assumed of Pinkie.

"I don't know, Pinkie. But, since we're staying, I think it's about time we break out the hard stuff." Rainbow Dash yelled out for service, and a familiar stallion came walking up.

"Yes Rainbow, what is it now?" Crescent said with a hint of annoyance. Rainbow simply ignored it, though.

"Two hard mugs of the best Apple Acres Cider you got, and a refreshed menu on the candidates for tonight!" Rainbow Dash answered, giving the menu and a large handful of bits that she didn't count to the waiter, whose attitude improved instantly.

"Two hard ciders and a refresh comin' up!" The waiter babbled out as he hurried to the kitchen, leaving the two mares to their own devices. The waiter returned with two very large mugs filled with cider and a newer-looking menu than before.

With that, Rainbow picked up the menu and started to open to look, but stopped herself.

"You know what?" Dash started, "Why don't you choose the next one?" Rainbow finished, handing the menu to Pinkie.

"Yay!" Pinkie exclaimed, taking the menu and instantly began searching the paper. A smile and frown both grew on the face of Rainbow as a thought entered her mind.

Tonight had just began. Without the birthday mare.

The smile won as Pinkie found the one she wanted.

The Next Day...

Rainbow slowly opened her bloodshot eyes. As soon as her eyes saw raw daylight they snapped back shut. She groaned in pain, placed her hooves over her eyes, and rolled onto her side. Worst. Hangover. Ever. Seriously, did her heart have to beat SO FUCKING LOUD?! She dropped her hooves from her eyes and wiped the drool from her mouth. Wait..., Rainbow sniffed at her hoof. This wasn't her drool. More over, this wasn't drool....

"Gross!" Dash shot up and began shaking her hoof furiously, trying to get the sticky substance off. She stopped after a couple of minutes, and sniffed the hoof, again. Her perverted curiosity took over and she licked her hoof. Sweet... She thought. Like fruit...

The blue mare looked around and realized she was on her front lawn. Cloud. Whatever. What the fuck happened last night? She decided to find Pinkie, and see if she knew. Wait... that was Pinkie she was with last night, right? Rainbow couldn't remember. She was pretty sure it was Pinkie. She decided to go find Pinkie, but didn't make it far. As soon as she tried flapping her wings, the sound pierced through her ears and stabbed her brain. She hit the ground and began rubbing her temples.

"Fuuuuuck." It was then she remembered that Berry Punch had mixed their drinks after the hard cider. She looked over and picked up an empty bottle and tried to read the label. Most of it was fuzzy, but she found what she was looking for.

"196 Proof!" Rainbow did the math (which was a piss poor idea in her condition) and figured out that was 98% alcohol. By all accounts, Rainbow Dash should've been dead. Beyond dead. Her ghost would go to Hell with a hangover, and that would be her eternal punishment. Living the aftermath of the dumbest decisions ever for all eternity. She threw the bottle, which was another bad choice, as it shattered against the wall. Rainbow screamed in pain, holding her hooves up to her ears. "MY GAWD! I CAN FEEL THAT IN MY EYES!"

After several more humorous antics at the cyan pegasus's expense, she decided to pony up and push through this. She stood up and trudged, one hoof at a time. She slowly turned the knob to her house, trying not to make as much noise as possible. She carefully opened the door and looked into her front foyer. Rainbow was met with the sight of what looked like the aftermath of a creepy circle jerk between Blueblood, Thunderlane, Soarin and Noteworthy. Honestly, after the night she probably had, this didn't even surprise Dash. This wasn't the first time she'd gotten plastered and invited the employees of the club back to her place. She tiptoed over the floor, avoiding any... remnants... of whatever happened here last night.

Poor Soarin. RD glanced over at the stallion who had seemed to get the brunt of the 'fun'. He was shiny from head to hoof and Rainbow could smell the liquid from across the room.

The next room she came to was... devastated. Dash couldn't think of a better word. The furniture was everywhere, and the ceiling was dripping various liquids Rainbow hoped were just splashed drinks. She looked around and noticed something else that was devastated the night prior.

"Oh god, Cheerilee..." She looked down at the pile in the center of the room. It was a tangled heap of sleeping ponies, with Cheerilee in the core. "I didn't even think it was possible to fit that many hooves there....." Dash shuddered but continued on, determined to find Pinkie and get some answers, or a bed to crash on. Whichever came softer. And was less drenched in bodily fluids.

After a couple more rooms full of passed out ponies stuck in strange contortions of raunchy pleasure, Rainbow Dash finally found the pink pony she was looking for. Dash still regrets what she saw, to this day.

Holy Hell in a hand basket! How the flyin' fuck is THAT even possible!? She knew it was Pinkie so she shouldn't have asked, because it's Pinkie, but still, how did he even get himself in there to begin with?

Lying before Rainbow Dash was Pinkie Pie, her hind legs spread, and a stallion stuck in her downstairs. An ENTIRE stallion wedged into the lips between the hips. Crescent, the stallion in question, had his head and a foreleg sticking out of Pinkie's stretched out vagina. Both were fast asleep and seemed ok with the situation.

Oh, Dash couldn't wait to hear the explanation for this one...

After about 2 hours of hung over ponies getting a grip on reality and heading home to relieve their headaches, Rainbow continued to clean her house of the aftermath from the previous night. Cleaning was the only thing she hated about these kind of things. That's why she never hosted parties in Cloudsdale Academy. After a thorough check of the living room, she decided to finally take care of the last two occupants in her home.

The pink earth pony hadn't stirred since Rainbow last saw her, still just sitting with her legs sprawled out, showing the world the prize within her legs. Of course, in that prize held one black stallion passed out from too much fun. It was still strange for Dashie seeing a full grown pony getting birthed out of her friend's cooch at 11 o' clock in the morning, but with the amount of booze that was consumed last night, anything was possible.

Rainbow took a moment to contemplate just how to wake the two up, but with no bright ideas, she just did it the old fashioned way.

"PINKIE, CRESCENT, GET UP! IT'S ALMOST NOON!" Rainbow screamed at the top of her lungs, vibrating some of the cloud material of the house. Crescent woke up groggily and began to climb out of his pink rabbit hole while Pinkie just groaned. Whether it was due to the giant mass leaving her body or RD's yelling was not known, but she made no effort to get up any further.

"Jeez Rainbow, what the hell was that for?" Crescent asked while standing up with a hoof to his forehead. It was amazing how a pony could get a hangover at least once a week for 4 years straight, and still not know anything effective at fighting a hangover. "Fuck me, this is a nasty one. Rainbow, do you got any Tylenol or something?"

Rainbow sighed and began to leave when she noticed Pinkie hadn't moved yet. Not in the mood for this, even from Pinkie, she tried the tactic a second time.

"PINKIE, GET THE FUCK UP! YOU GOTTA BE UP AND READY FOR WORK IN 3 HOURS!" Crescent put his hooves to his ears and screamed in pure agony.

"Ow! Christ, can you stop yelling already? Celestia damn!" Crescent whined.

Pinkie became aware of her situation at the second scream and began to try to get up to her hooves. After recreating a perfect resemblance of Bambi and his first steps, she toppled over and sprawled out her legs to prevent her fall. She split her legs in complete opposite directions in a way that most gymnasts would kill to be able to do.

Rainbow just laughed at the sight of the pink mare. If she didn't believe Pinkie had never gotten drunk before and never had a hangover before, she did now. She was as klutzy as a drunk Ditzy Doo, and was just as adorable. Still, she was hungover as hell, and Dash had no idea how she was gonna be ready for Sugarcube Corner today.

"Well, if you're not gonna get me a damn Tylenol, I'll just go already," Crescent huffed before heading for the front door.

"See ya later, asshole!" Rainbow called out. Crescent simply flipped her the bird(explain how that's possible in your own mind, I sure as hell can't) and left, slamming the door behind him. With one gone, Rainbow returned her attention to her best friend who had finally gotten a grasp on walking again. She decided to help a little more by getting next to Pinkie to give her something to lean on.

"Damn Pinkie, how much did you drink last night?" RD asked, at this point somewhat curious. Sure, it might of been her first, but this was ridiculous. Either she was a hell of a lightweight, or there was something else to this. Pinkie groaned and raised one hoof, pointing at one dark corner she hadn't even paid attention too. Rainbow looked at where Pinkie was pointing, and immediately left Pinkie's side, leaving the party animal to tip over and groan more.

"WHAT THE FUCK?! Pinkie, please tell me you didn't do what I think you did!" Rainbow yelled in both anger and concern as she looked down a wooden barrel. It was now empty with small drops of red-colored liquid hanging of the edges. Rainbow quickly couched to look at the label on the barrel's front.

Coltasia- Crimson Rose

Arrival in paradise

"GODDAMNIT! That was some expensive beer! that cost me 600-" Rainbow stopped her verbal assault when she noticed a glass bottle behind the barrel. She didn't keep any type of wine or beer in glass containers, where had that come from...

She moved the barrel to grab the bottle and investigate it further when a trick of the light cast a small glare on something shiny. The glare hit Dash straight in the face and grabbed her attention.

"What the?" She moved closer to the source of reflection while Pinkie prepared herself. This wasn't gonna go well.

She was right. Five seconds later, the rainbow pony appeared from the dark corner with a surprisingly blank look on her face.

She face planted the floor with a grunt and small whimper.

"Let me get this straight: last night you were challenged by Cheerilee to a drinking contest," Rainbow started and looked up into Pinkie's eyes. Pinkie simply nodded in affirmation. "You outdrank her at 16, but wanted to keep going," Rainbow stopped again, waiting for Pinkie's confirmation. Pinkie nodded again.

"BUT, you wanted to keep going. You kept going until you ran out of available beer in the living room. Then, you went to my private collection and started drinking out of it," Pinkie uh-huhed. "You finished that off, then were actually able to call Berry Bunch and get her to bring TWENTY-EIGHT CASES OF SPARKLING WINE TO MY CLOUD HOME AT TWO O' CLOCK IN THE FUCKING MORNING. Not only that, but you charged the cost of the wine to ME." Pinkie confirmed again, further driving Rainbow crazy.

"After that, you decided to fuck Crescent Cast in the middle of my private collection. Then finally, you passed out while halfway through." Pinkie continued to confirm all of this, though she seemed to blush slightly at Crescent's name. Rainbow stared at Pinkie for a few moments that seemed to last an eternity for the Element of Laughter before Dash broke out into a humongous laugh.

"Are you serious, Pinkie? All of that on your first night out ever? Damn, you make me feel like a fucking joke of a partier. First night I actually partied I only got to first base with a dude and drank two shots of Promane." Rainbow all said while guffawing like a drunk. Pinkie continued to listen while wiping the counter.

It was a good thing Sugarcube Corner wasn't busy around four, or else this would get far more interesting with the yelling. The Cakes had taken the explanation of Pinkie's attitude and tardiness extremely well, far better than Dashie or Pinkie would have thought. If anything, Mrs. Cake seemed happy that she was finally going out towards the "mature" adult scene. Something about finally growing up and experiencing the world. Mr. Cake just didn't want it to become a daily thing and interfere with business.

Meanwhile, the story of Pinkie having a hangover was going viral throughout Ponyville. Ponies were coming in to Sugarcube Corner randomly without ordering anything, just wanting to see if the rumors were true. Of course, every time one of them got the guts to actually say something, Dashie overwhelmed them with details of the previous night. Some walked away with a knowing grin while others just seemed shocked and disgusted at Pinkie's actions, or more importantly, her drinking. Those ponies usually didn't last long with Dash nearby, though.

After another hour of simply hanging out at Sugarcube Corner, two familiar ponies came waltzing through the door, eyes instantly locking onto them.

"There you two are!" Rarity said as she trotted over to the two mares along the counter, accompanied by Fluttershy shortly behind.

"Hey Rare, how's it hanging?" Rainbow welcomed the unicorn.

"How's it hanging, dear?" Rarity said in annoyance and anger, "What's 'hanging' around the air of Ponyville is the rumor that two of the Elements of Harmony were..." Rarity looked for the correct term.

"Shit-faced last night?" Rainbow finished, a smile growing on her face. The Element of Generosity was not amused, however.

"So, it's TRUE!?"

"Yup," Pinkie answered instead of RD, which seemed to anger and shock Rarity more than before.

"My Celestia, I honestly expected it to be true for Rainbow, but for you, Pinkie?!" Rarity sputtered. Fluttershy continued to say nothing, instead enjoying a smoothie she had ordered from Mrs. Cake during the chaos(no, no popcorn. Just how cliché do you think I am?).

"Hey, lighten up. Birthday girl didn't wanna party too hard, so Pinks made up for it," Rainbow defended. "By the way, where is Twilight anyway?"

"I'm not sure. I haven't seen her come out of the library all day. I'll go visit her after this. I need Spike's assisstance with something anyway."

"Huh. Well, I better go clear up some clouds. My wings could use a little stretching anyway," Rainbow concluded and headed for the door.

"Well, don't get too loose. Don't wanna be for later tonight, that'd take the fun out of it!" Pinkie called out, causing Rainbow to look back in confusion.

"What are you talking about, Pinkie?"

"Duh, silly. I'm talking about tonight's party!"

Fuck.

Author's Note

Shardz note: Hope you enjoyed this colab with Silverlinings. Please leave any thoughts or suggestions down below.

Silverlinings note: Just saiyan, I had a SHIT TON of fun making this.

P.S. Bonus chapters coming soon. Please wait patiently. Be warned: There WILL be clop involved in most bonus chapters.

BONUS: Makin' Some Magical Memories, If Ya Know What I Mean.

This bonus chapter contains clop, as many of the bonus chapters will.
Triggers include but are not limited to: F/F, Futa, Oral, Cum Swallowing, Creampie, and Toys.
If you have problems with any of these triggers, please leave and go elsewhere.
With all pointless warnings that you're gonna ignore aside, enjoy!

As three mares walked outside, a sudden breeze made the air as cold as ice. At least that's what felt like to the ponies strolling out of the Pink Pony at 10:30 p.m.

"Well, that was certainly interesting, wasn't it girls?" Rarity said, breaking the silence between the trio. Fluttershy just continued to walk and say nothing, wanting to get out of that "area" as soon as possible. Twilight was willing to talk, however.

"Yes, it was," Twilight answered, a hint of happiness in her voice. "I mean, it was interesting, alright! Not like I wanna go back or anything!" Twilight quickly added, realizing her mistake too late. This earned an awkward silence from the white unicorn, though they never stopped moving.

As they crossed the wooden bridge to town central, the trio stopped in the large town square, each turning to look towards the others.

"Well, I suppose this is where we go our separate ways for tonight. It was a rather... fun night I suppose." Rarity said.

"Uh... yeah. Fun." Twilight replied while looking down towards the ground, a blush growing on her face. Fluttershy continued to say nothing, odd even for the shy pegasus. Eventually, the moment and goodbyes were passed as they all headed for home. Except one.

As Twilight lurked through Ponyville after dark, she kept her eyes peeled for the light blue unicorn that "entertained" her earlier. After looking through a large portion of Ponyville, she began to give up. Around the corner, she found something that suited her interests well: Trixie's cart.

She knocked on the door and waited. When no answer came at all, she simply entered the cart without permission after finding the door unlocked.

She found Trixie's cart to be surprisingly roomy on the inside than it appeared on the outside. It had a very small kitchen and a bathroom, and of course a bed in the center. Everything was neat and tidy to Twilight's joy, with nothing seemingly out of place. Not sure what to do now, Twilight began to snoop.

It didn't take long to find Trixie's own "toys", as Twilight found them under her bed. She definitely had more than Twilight as she soon found out. While Twilight only had one to help take care of her when she was in heat, Trixie seemed to have many of varying sizes and shapes, some seemingly too large to fit inside a pony.

Tucking them back underneath the bed, she found her hoof going to her own marehood, wanting release from the earlier tease. Twilight happily obliged, rubbing her pony pussy with easy motions. She didn't want to come yet. No, that honor would go to the main performer tonight.

As Trixie walked down the barren streets of Ponyville after dark, she readjusted her thong with her magic with annoyance.

Damn clothing. I just wish to get home and take off this stupid thing and go to bed. Trixie began to get angry quickly with all the events of the night. First, she hadn't been able to get any customers, which was rather boring. It had been a slow night, which Trixie didn't like to begin with.

When she had finally gotten an order, she was more than surprised to see an all-too familiar purple mare. The same one that shunned her in front of the whole town. The same one she found all too irresistible.

She didn't know when she had started finding Twilight sexy, but all she knew was that when the purple unicorn was around, she had trouble keeping her "equipment" calm. That shyness of everything, that rump that swayed with every step she took, that magical power, it just turned her on in a way she couldn't explain.

When she got the chance to be paid to be sexy for that Twilight, she thought she was having a wet dream again. Even when she was in a club, she still retained that sexy shyness so well, it made Trixie wanna explode.

She wondered what would happen if they ever met outside of the club again. It would certainly be awkward, but she had no idea how she would be able to avoid it. Of course, it would all be better if Twilight walked away, giving her a view of that perfect ass walking away...

With that thought, a familiar tug came from her thong, reminding her all too much of her sexual frustration. She'd have to have a long session with her toys to take care of one this bad. With that thought in mind, her home appeared in her vision and she walked to get inside. she pulled her keys out and aimed for the keyhole, but as she began to unlock the door, the door just opened on its own.

Strange, I must've forgotten to lock the door on my way out, Trixie thought as she entered her home and saw nothing out of place. As she got comfortable from a long night's job, she grabbed a dildo from underneath her bed and took off her thong to reveal her growing member, now just under 6 inches and growing. A loud gasp filled the air that didn't come from Trixie.

"Who's there?" Trixie called out to the intruder. No reply came. ""Trixie knows you're here, come out. Now!" Still no reply. Just as Trixie was about to give one last chance before the cops, a sudden distortion of the air in front of her changed her mind. Moments later, the distortion dissipated to reveal a lavender unicorn Trixie fantasized all too much about.

"Sparkle?! What are you-" For the second time that night her words were cut short by the mare's lips locking onto hers, catching her pleasantly off-guard. Once the initial shock subsided, she began to kiss back, aware of what she was doing.

It wasn't long before their tongues began to meet, swapping saliva for dominance of the other's mouth. Though Twilight gave a lot of energy into hers, she was still a rookie compared to Trixie, who's tongue moved far more freely and efficiently. They continued the battle between their mouths before Twilight eventually broke the kiss to take in breath. Trixie was out of breath, but didn't want to show.

"Couldn't resist the Great and Powerful Trixie, hmm?" Trixie grinned down on Twilight, now lying on her bed spread-eagle style, presenting her prize proudly to the magician. Every fantasy Trixie ever had was coming true in front of her eyes, and whether it was real or not she was going to enjoy every moment of it.

Twilight shook her head and got back up onto her haunches. Before Trixie even knew what was happening, she felt something warm and wet hit her tip. She moaned and looked down at the cause of it; Twilight was licking the head of her cock slowly, twisting her tongue around it with incredible skill for a virgin. Trixie realized this but didn't care. It felt too good to question it right now.

After a pleasurable few minutes of toying the unicorn's cock with her tongue, Twilight took it up a step and took it in her mouth, instantly earning a moan of approval from the blue unicorn. She started slow at first and stopped from going any further than the medial ring, but eventually began taking more and more of the now fully hard 8 inch horse cock until she finally reached her gag reflex halfway through. A few attempts at going further all ended in failure, but neither unicorn seemed to mind at this point.

In her current situation, Trixie's mind was going a hundred miles per hour with sheer ecstasy. She had always imagined Twilight sucking her cock, but she never imagined it would feel so good. She could only imagine how good her tight throat would feel, and prepared to jam her dick into the purple mare's throat until another thought came to mind from earlier that night.

"Twi-Twilight...," Trixie tried to say, but nothing but bits and pieces came out in her pleasure-stricken voice. Twilight seemed to understand though as her eyes locked on Trixie's, though her mouth never stopped doing her wonderful job.

"Is this yo-your first?" Trixie finally managed to finish as she felt a familiar sensation through her balls. She was getting close fast between the excitement Trixie had and the pleasure being delivered between her legs. A nod and a noise Trixie identified as "uh-huh" put her in a hell of an inner battle.

Should she cum inside Twilight's mouth, or pull out for later? She didn't want to ruin Twilight's first, but the sensation of her mouth was overriding her thoughts and making her body shudder in bliss. Her body made the decision for her though as she moaned loudly and felt the familiar release of sperm, directly into Twilight's mouth.

Twilight's eyes grew wide in surprise at first, but quickly her body reacted by swallowing burst after burst of the liquid. Soon, she finally reached her limit and took her mouth off the cock to take a breath. Trixie immediately missed the warm, wet mouth she had gotten used to and wanted more. Twilight didn't give her a chance though as she laid back onto Trixie's bed, stretching her legs out to give her lover a good look at her virgin pride. Her pussy leaked juices non-stop, aching for relief. The hoof she had been using not good enough anymore. She needed the real thing.

Trixie took the hint immediately and got on top of the bed in missionary position for Twilight's first real fuck. As she lined up her cock with Twilight's wet folds, Twilight whimpered and begged, wanting it inside of her now. As Trixie finally made contact and began slowly going inside, Twilight made a sound between a moan and a scream of pain.

Seeing her chance to do something she would never be able to do, Trixie lowered her head to whisper into Twilight's ear.

"Are you ready for me pop your cherry, Twilight? Hmm?" Trixie said seductively, toying with the virgin. Twilight mumbled something unintelligible, but Trixie wasn't letting her off that easy.

"What was that? Speak up, Twilight. Trixie can't hear you. You have to ask for it." Twilight mumbled louder, but Trixie still couldn't understand her. "Well, I guess you don't want it enough. That's alright, I'll just use my toys if you don't want the real thing." Trixie wanted a reaction from Twilight, and a reaction was what she got.

"Please...," begged Twilight.

"Please, what? Trixie can't do anything if you don't tell her what you want," replied Trixie. She was enjoying being the dom too much to pass this opportunity up even if it was Twilight's first. She had her right where she wanted her, and all Twilight had to do was say it.

"Please rut me, Trixie! I'm tired of waiting, I want to be rutted now!" Twilight screamed and let out her frustration. She looked like she could've started crying any moment from sheer agony. Trixie grinned and lowered herself to Twilight's ear like before.

"The Great and Powerful Trixie is going to use her 'magical' cock to fuck that little virgin pussy of yours until you scream Celestia's name, you little bitch." Before Twilight could respond, Trixie slammed her hips down to meet Twilight's and rammed her meat inside, instantly breaking Twilight's hymen and eliciting a scream from the lavender mare. The intense pain and pleasure finally drove Twilight over the edge and caused a long-awaited orgasm to rack her body, leaving her speechless.

Trixie was in heaven as soon as she forced herself inside Twilight's unimaginably tight hole, but it only got better as she felt the virgin's pussy tighten even more and release her juices. While she wanted to stop and enjoy the feeling, she continued pumping Twilight without hesitating. She needed to keep going before Twilight felt the massive pain from her popped cherry over the feeling of great rutting.

As Trixie continued her assault on Twilight's pussy, Twilight began to babble and moan incoherently in pleasure. After a few minutes of continued fucking, it started to become rather stale for the experienced stripper. Instead of changing the speed however, Trixie had a better idea.

Picking up her toy off the floor from earlier, she placed the toy in her mouth and began sucking on it, coating it in saliva while continuing to rut Twilight senseless. Wasting no time at all, she shoved it down her throat as far as she could and held it, focusing on her pleasurable deep throat than Twilight's screw. After 15 seconds of successfully holding it down, she finally gagged and spat the toy back up, now shimmering with saliva on it. She levitated it out of her mouth and once she located her target, she rammed it with incredible speed straight into Twilight's flank hole.

Twilight went wide-eyed and silent for a few moments before returning from cloud nine with an even bigger orgasm than her first. The pleasure of her pussy tightening again made Trixie's own climax seem to approach faster than before, now only seconds away from bursting her load. Wanting to make the most of it, she increased her speed as fast as possible and rammed as deep as she could with both real and fake cock at once.

With a groan, she released her load directly into Twilight's waiting womb, launching shot after shot of her semen while continuing to pump as fast and hard as she could muster. After finally feeling Twilight's pussy overflow with juices, she took her member out of Twilight's pussy and opened the floodgate of juices.

As Trixie watched her unmoving partner leak the aftermath of her fantasy come true, she began to feel light-headed and passed out into black darkness, as her lover had done seconds before unknowingly.

As Twilight woke up in her unfamiliar sleeping environment, all of last night's events flooded her memory. Directly next to her was the blue mare she had lost her virginity too the previous night. Twilight smiled at the thought and got up out of bed, only to realize how much she smelled of sex. Not wanting to return home to Spike smelling like that, she turned towards the bathroom to take a quick shower before beginning her journey home.

Speaking of which, she wondered if Spike was worried right now about where she was. She quickly dismissed the thought however as she entered the shower and felt the hot water wash away her worries.

He probably isn't even awake by now. What am I afraid of? Twilight thought as she lathered her coat with shampoo. He's probably taking advantage of being able to sleep in. I know, I would.

After a few more minutes of lathering, rinsing, and repeating as well as going over a mental checklist of things to do, she stepped out of the shower and dried off with a towel. Once she found it suitably dry, she hung the towel back in its original place. She walked out of the restroom to the sight of Trixie watching her with what appeared to be a frown on her face.

The sound of running water caused Trixie to awaken from her slumber involuntarily. Being the huge morning person that she is, she groaned and put her pillow over face to block the noise.

Can a mare not get some sleep around here? She thought as the sound of her shower filled her ears through the pillow. She continued to try to block out the noise to no avail, but she quickly woke up on realizing that she was listening to her shower, and her lover of last night was nowhere to be seen.

So that's it? My fantasy came true for a single night, but now everything returns to the way it was? Trixie reached down and touched her member, still pleasantly sore from the night before. Something finally went her way, and now that was going to end as quickly as it began.

Trixie began to run through her options of what she could do now, from telling Twilight her feelings outright to simply forgetting this night altogether. She really didn't hope it didn't go down that path, but anything was possible. Just then, the sound of running water stopped. Trixie listened in and all her thoughts stopped, waiting for Twilight to appear in the door.

After a few moments of waiting, the lavender mare stepped out of the bathroom with her eyes closed in a happy manner. As her eyes opened, she looked straight at Trixie and her smile vanished into a look of concern.

"Good morning, Trixie. I hope you don't mind I used your shower," Twilight said with the look of concern still on her face.

"No, Trixie supposes not, but where are you going so early?" Trixie asked with more attitude than anything.

"Well, I need to get back to the library soon. It needs to be opened, and I'm sure Spike is wondering where I am. The faster I get back, the better chance I have of him not being awake and not having to make up a lie," Twilight explained. "Which kinda leads up to my question for you. When's the next time you want to do this again?"

"What?" asked Trixie, wanting reconfirmation of what she thought she just heard.

"Well, I wanted to know when you wanted to get together again, and... you know..," Twilight trailed off, still not comfortable using the word with other ponies. Her ears splayed back slightly against her head as she continued, "Well, that is, if you wanna do this again. I mean if you don't want to, that's alright, too..."

"No! Trixie means, no, Trixie wouldn't mind doing this again. Just at what time?"

"Well, I'm filled up with things to do around the library and my friends for the next couple of days, but I should be available next Sunday all afternoon. Would that be okay?"

"Yes, that would be fine." replied Trixie.

"Well, see you then, Trixie!" Twilight said as she left through the door, giving Trixie a perfect view of the flank she made her's last night.

As Trixie got up to take a shower of her own to prepare for her day of magic shows, a smile stayed stuck upon her face.

The Horny and Pleasurable Trixie now had a permanent, private audience of one.

Author's Note

This chapter was written by Shardz solely. (C1, 1-3B)
My first clopfic written ever. Probably shoulda tried writing a one-shot and see how that went first before this, huh?
Editing by Silverlinings and Pegasi Bob
Leave thoughts, suggestions, and grammar errors below.
P.S. I realize I might've wrote the last line a little strangely. Trixie has not quit the Pink Pony, if that's what you got from it.

BONUS: Braeburn's been a Baaaaad Wittle Colt

WARNING: This bonus chapter contains incest. Much incest. Also, there's fellatio, creampie and some minor BDSM. I don't want to hear any bitchin' from any pony in the comments, so you've been warned. (Probs missed one. I don't know all the triggers.)

Applejack and Braeburn were sitting in the living room of the Apple Family home. Braeburn had been told to sit down, shut up and wait, while AJ talked to Granny Smith.

"Just one minute, deary. I need to go take care of something, then you can tell me what's wrong." Granny Smith walked into another room, leaving AJ and Brae alone.

"Really, Cuz. You're over reactin'," Braeburn huffed.

"I caught you workin' a pole!" Applejack shot back.

"I'm a fully grown stallion, I c'n make my own choices!" Braeburn retorted.

"An' you call sellin' yourself out for a few extra bits, destroyin' your public image, and bringin' shame to this family a GOOD choice?!" Applejack stomped her hoof.

Braeburn opened his mouth to reply, but was interrupted by AJ.

"Nope, Granny Smith's gotta know 'bout this." Applejack turned, looking at the door Granny Smith had gone through. After several minutes, AJ's blind rage subsided long enough for her to realize what room Granny Smith went into. "Great..." She sighed. Granny Smith, bless her, had gone to bed, completely forgetting that a furious Applejack and a now embarrassed Braeburn had tried to start a conversation with her. Well... AJ did at least. Braeburn just wanted to go home. It was a long ride back to Appleloosa, and he was only there for the off season. He needed to get home in time for harvest season, and what better time, then when he needed to get away from family the most?

"Well then," Braeburn clapped his front hooves together, climatically, "guess I'll be headin' home, then..." He bolted for the exit, but was cut short by Applejack's hoof stomping onto his tail.

"I don' think so..." AJ knew Braeburn had to be punished, she just didn't know what to do. The only pony she'd had to punish was Apple Bloom, and a time out in the corner, wasn't gonna cut it. Nope, Brae had been a bad, bad little stallion... and needed to be taught a lesson.

Braeburn slowly opened his eyes. He winced slightly, at the large welt on his forehead. "What da hay?" It took his freshly bruised brain a second to catch up with what had happened. The last thing he saw before everything went black was a set of size nine horse shoes coming at him full buck. AJ most have knocked him out cold. He decided just to slip out while he could, but was halted by the simple fact that his hooves were tied to the posts of the bed he was lying in. "Buck me...." He cried out loud.

"Don' worry, we'll get t' that." Braeburn's head darted around to see AJ standing in the doorway. She had a look of "I'm pissed at you, but let's have fun with this."

"Wait... what?" Braeburn wasn't sure he'd heard his cousin correctly. "AJ... what's goin' on?"

The orange mare walked over to the bedside, "Did I stutter, motherbucker?" She sighed and decided to expand on the situation at hand. "You've been a bad colt, Brae. Jus' sellin' it to whoever was buyin'. Well now... I'm buyin'." She dropped a sack of bits onto the bed. She had no intention of going any farther than just making her cousin uncomfortable. The feeling of unease should've been enough to scare Brae straight.

The yellow stallion swallowed hard, his face turning red, as he stared at the sack of bits. "Well, uh... I, uh..." For once, Braeburn had nothing to say.

Applejack smirked. "What's wrong Brae? I'm a payin' customer, aren't I?"

Braeburn looked from the sack of bits, to his cousin, back and forth.

"Maybe there ain't enough blood gettin' to your head." AJ straddled Braeburn and leaned over to one of the bedposts, "Maybe if I loosen these a little."

Braeburn began sweating, profusely. "Uh..." His eyes were wide, getting in the full, undershot of AJ, looking her up and down.

Applejack tugged at the knots in the ropes, not doing anything with them. She merely wanted to make Braeburn more uncomfortable. She thought it was going her way, until she felt something nudge her flank. Something... rounded. She stopped fiddling pointlessly with the knot and stared at her cousin, unamused. "Oh, for the love of Pete..."

Applejack got off of her cousin and stared at his rising shaft. She wasn't as angry anymore. Now, she was just frustrated. Honestly, couldn't Braeburn control himself?

Braeburn followed Applejack's gaze down to his nether regions. Braeburn slowly put two and two together, looking from the sack of bits, to his cousin, to his stallionhood. If AJ really wanted him, then what was with this negative reaction to his erection? A light bulb went off in Braeburn's head. So that's how it's gonna be, is it Cuz? Well two c'n partake in this game.

Braeburn smirked, "What's wrong AJ? Like you said; you're a payin' customer and I'm here to serve. So what's the hold up?"

Applejack stared at the stallion's long, hard phallus. Was this really happening? This was her cousin. True, they didn't see each other much, what with him living out in Appleloosa... But he was still kin. It was wrong. But why couldn't she stop staring at the throbbing limb? It was almost mesmerizing. She slowly got closer. In hindsight, was it really so bad? Like she thought before: they weren't close relatives...

Braeburn stared at Applejack, who seemed distracted by his junk. What was with her? It wasn't anything special: about as long as the other stallions he'd seen. However, he may have been looking at this all wrong. It occurred to him that, although she had an outgoing attitude, Applejack was never one to chase after stallions. Could it be, that she was still a virgin and had never seen a schlong in this state before? All of these thoughts were almost instantly washed away, as something warm wrapped itself around his projectile: AJ's mouth.

This caught Applejack by surprise as much it did Braeburn. What was she doing?! But she couldn't help herself, it was just so... inviting. Almost instinctually, she began moving her head up and down, only taking about half of the shaft in. Every time she moved down, she was greeted with a heavy breath outward, from Braeburn. The stallion had his eyes closed, his head tilted back and every muscle relaxed. He was going to say something at first, something about how wrong it was, but he honestly didn't care. It felt amazing.

Applejack stopped caring as well and became completely immersed in the experience. She closed her eyes and began slowly taking in more and more of Braeburn's member with every head bob. It was warm and her saliva, mixed with the precum, made for good lubricant. She was able to slide up and down the nine inch, one-eyed monster with ease. Unfortunately, she could only go so far. Her gag reflex stopped any passage beyond her mouth. She continued to work his phallus, slowly picking up the pace and after several minutes Braeburn's breath began to speed up.

"Uhh.. h-hey, AJ?" he said, eyes still shut. "I don't mean t' interrupt, but I- I think soon, I'm gonna..." He couldn't quite get the words out, but Applejack understood. He was on the verge of climaxing. She took his member out of her mouth, a single, glistening strand of precum connecting them. Braeburn's breath slowed.

She slowly moved her way onto the bed and next to Braeburn. She smiled and whispered into Braeburn's ear, "Ah know where you can dump your load."

The yellow pony's eyes snapped open and he looked over at his cousin, "What?"

The orange mare sighed, and planted a kiss on her cousin's cheek.

Braeburn didn't know what to think. "Are ya sure?"

"Only if ya want to," She replied.

Braeburn smiled, "Mind takin' the straps off?"

Braeburn and Applejack rolled across the bed, wrapped as close as they could be, sharing a romantic, if a bit sloppy, kiss. Eventually they ended up with Braeburn on top and Applejack begging him to take her. After fiddling around with the condom wrapper, eventually finding a way to open it without fingers, he slowly began pressing the tip of his member against her entrance, earning a satisfying moan from the farm mare. He pressed until his was granted clearance, and he moved about an inch inside, inciting a squeak, much higher pitch than her usual voice, from AJ.

The orange mare bit her lower lip. While it was true she'd used her hooves plenty of times for such jobs, she had no idea the real deal would be so enjoyable. It was painful, but it was a good pain. Like after a hard days work, it was satisfying.

"Mmm... Brae..." She moaned in ecstasy.

"Yeah AJ?" He whispered.

"Keep... keep goin'..." She eventually let out.

The stallion smiled and began moving in slowly and back out, then back in, creating a sort of rhythm. He would've gone faster, but Applejack was surprisingly tight, and he could only go at a certain pace, without hurting her to much.

"Faster..." She moaned.

"Ya sure? Ah don' want t' hurt ya..." He said.

"Ah don' care," She wrapped her front hooves around Brae's neck.

After a little hesitation, he began picking up the pace, causing AJ's breathing to speed up and her moaning to become louder.

"Oh Celestia..." She exclaimed.

Braeburn backed out a little and paused, before plowing into her as deep as he could. Applejack screamed out in pure pleasure, as she began to tighten around his limb.

AJ's sudden reflexes sent Braeburn over the edge. He began filling up the condom with his juices as he continued to pound his cousin. However, it had been sometime since he'd ejaculated, and the condom wasn't exactly new. It didn't take long before the dam burst and the stallion's spunk began seeping out of AJ's snatch. After a couple seconds of silence, Brae collapsed next to Applejack. They looked at each other and smiled, their breathing heavy. They slowly began to drift to sleep, not caring about the mess they had made. They'd worry about it later.

Applejack slowly opened her eyes and looked at the window. It was morning, sunrise to be specific. It took her a couple of seconds to realize her cooch was warm and a few more seconds to remember why. She rolled over to find that her cousin was gone. She sat up slightly and looked around. She got up and noticed that the bed was almost completely clean, just a couple little spots that weren't too noticeable. As she was about to leave her room, the door slowly opened and a yellow stallion peered through.

"Oh good," he entered the room entirely and closed the door, "you're awake. Listen, 'bout last night..."

Applejack and Braeburn knew this would happen: that awkward aftersex conversation, made even more awkward since they were kin.

"The way I see it, we can look at it two ways," AJ explained. "One, we could continue in this little affair and pray no pony finds out or, two, we c'n jus' stop right now and act like it never happened. Not that it weren't amazin' an' all, but I like the second idea better. Less chance o' gettin' caught an' such..."

"Right. Of course," Braeburn agreed. "But there's still one thing that's been eatin' at me..." he glanced over at the garbage can, which had the torn condom on top.

"Riiiiight..." AJ blushed slightly. "Well... hope f'r the best?"

"An' if the worst comes t' pass?" Braeburn looked at his cousin.

The orange mare sighed, "We'll cross that bridge when we get there. Oh, one last thing," she reached under her bed and pulled out a bag of bits. Not as big as the bag she had before, which was actually filled with spare nuts and bolts instead of real money. This bag was a little smaller, but still a decent size. "Jus' so no pony c'n call me a liar."

Braeburn smiled and accepted the bag. As the two of them were walking down the stairs, they were greeted by Apple Bloom.

"Braeburn!" She called, "When did you get here?" She was delighted to see her cousin.

"Jus' last night, but ah gotta go," He tussled her hair and began walking to the door.

"Aww" Apple Bloom looked crestfallen, "why'd ya only come over for one night?"

Braeburn stopped and looked at the little filly. "Well..." He looked at the bag of bits and smiled. He turned and opened the door. Right as he was about to leave, he turned again and said, "I was here on business."

Author's Note

Chapter by Silverlinings alone. (C1, 2-3B)
I've written stuff like this before, but it's still odd for me. Especially since this is my first smut fic for MLP.
Edited by Shardz and Pegasi Bob
Comment what you thought: Any suggestions, creative criticism, grammatical errors, ETC.

BONUS: A Challenger Appears

As everyone's least favorite guard walked down the hall of the Crystal Palace, he occasionally walked past another fellow guard, simply locking eyes and nodding as he continued on his way to the barracks. He hurried along as fast as he could without running, wanting to get the heavy armor off and relax.

Seriously, who the hell thinks it's fun to walk around in 70-pound armor for 8 hours straight? Flash Sentry thought to himself while walking down the kitchen hallway, getting a whiff of tonight's dinner. It smelled of basic ingredients such as warmed hay and wheat bread. Hay sandwiches again? The Princess really doesn't enjoy the fancy stuff, does she?

After leaving the kitchen hallway and losing the scent of food, he returned back to his previous thoughts and complaining.

Couldn't they just use magic to lighten these things up? How hard could it be for them. If the battle mages can summon goddamn crystal shards from thin air or use healing magic to recover any wounds instantaneously for an amount of time, why not take five minutes to reduce the weight of these damn things? Flash rambled on inside his head, musing the facts to himself.

After a few minutes of walking, he was finally nearing his destination and began contemplating what to do tonight. Watch a movie? No, nothing good to watch. Read a little? Nope, that last book he read about the romance between a fucking batpony, earth pony, and a damn lycan pretty much killed his love of books.

As he continued to list possibilities of tonight, he went around a corner, straight into another fellow guard. Both ponies fell on their ass with a clank of metal on metal and then metal on crystal. The guard looked at Flash Sentry with a face of pure annoyance until he recognized him.

"There you are, sir. I was sent to find you to tell you her highness wanted to speak with you as soon as you could spare the time." The officer spoke, as if he had been rehearsing the words for a while. Flash Sentry was just confused and somewhat stunned.

"Me? Why would the Princess want to see me?" Sentry asked of the guard. The guard simply shook his head.

"She didn't say, sir. I was just told to find you and let you know." With that, the guard sauntered off the way he came, leaving Flash Sentry with more questions than answers. After a brief moment of hesitation, he headed towards the royal throne, wondering just what in the hell she could need him for.

As Flash Sentry entered the room, the sound of the closing doors echoed throughout the room. The noise continued to echo around the room before fading to silence as before.

Princess Mi Amora Cadenza was sitting on her throne, or to be correct, she was lying on her throne with her head perched on her forehooves. She appeared to be napping until she began to rise from her throne and walked down the aisle towards the new arrival.

"Good evening, Princess."

"Good evening, Lt. Sentry," Cadence returned the greeting, "I didn't expect you until the morning, but that's alright. That means I'll actually have a little free time to myself in the morning." She continued with a smile. Sentry just chuckled, knowing personally how good it was to actually be able to sleep in.

"Well, I was told to meet you as soon as possible by your messenger. Why did you request to see me anyway, Princess?" Flash asked.

"Please, call me Cadence, and well, I think it's about time we discuss something that occurred a small time ago." Cadence answered, further confusing the pegasus guard.

"Discuss what, ma'am? Has something happened in the Guard that requires my attention?" Flash asked, hoping to get a more straightforward answer this time. Cadence seemed to pick up on the Flash's confusion and worry, and began to walk to a window to the left, a large window overlooking the magnificent Crystal Empire.

"Don't worry Lieutenant; you aren't in any trouble of any kind. You can relax a little. Would you like a drink?" Cadence offered.

"No ma'am, I'm fine, but back to the subject, why have you requested me?" Flash asked once again, getting slightly annoyed at the constant dodging of the question. Of course, it was all inwardly emotions. If he showed annoyance to a Princess... Well, he could kiss his ass goodbye.

"Do you remember the situation a little over 2 months ago involving Princess Sparkle's crown?" Cadence asked, turning to look at Flash Sentry as she spoke.

"Yes. Princess Sparkle's crown was stolen in the middle of the night by one of Princess Celestia's previous students and taken to another world. Princess Sparkle gave chase the next morning, and after 3 days, she returned with her crown. Correct?" Flash Sentry explained, really hoping he hadn't fucked up the summary somehow.

"Yep. Why I wanted to speak to you is something that occurred here in the castle while she was here that very visit. Something involving you two." Cadence said with a sly smile. Flash instantly blushed.

"Us two?!" Flash replied, not knowing what else to say. Cadence simply laughed.

"Yes, you two. You don't need to hide it; I am the Princess of Love after all. Honestly, I find it adorable. Little Twily found a crush," Cadence said with a smile growing on her face. "In the Guard, no less. What is it about you soldier-types that get us mares so easily anyway? I'm the Princess of Love, and I still haven't figured out why I like a stallion in uniform." Cadence stared into Flash's eyes with a look that he wasn't prepared for, lust if he had ever seen it. Cadence must've noticed the stallion's uncomfortable state, as she quickly looked away with a small blush growing on her face.

"Uh, sorry about that. Uh, well... back to what I was getting at, I saw that "thing" going on between you two and thought it was cute, but didn't say anything, just to let it go its own course. 2 months later, everything's turned back to normal, and you two seemed to have completely forgotten about each other." Cadence continued explaining, returning her view back to the world beyond the window. The sun was setting, and the sun's final rays of light were bouncing off of crystal ponies' homes and giving quite a light show to its audience.

"Prin-Cadence, why exactly are you telling me about this? Is there something you want me to do for Princess Sparkle?" Flash asked.

"Well, as you probably know, a few weeks ago when Tirek returned and Twilight finally opened a magical box she had received on becoming a princess, she received a castle. Her own castle." Cadence elaborated while continuing to stare out at the final glimpses of the sun before the moon would take its place in the sky.

"Of course with a castle now, and now further confirmation as her status as a Princess, she needs guards. Experienced guards that are commanded by her and her alone." Cadence looked at Flash. "See where I'm getting at?"

Flash Sentry didn't hear her last words. He was too far gone in thoughts.

So this it. This is my chance to live in Ponyville. He thought. So many perks to be had as a Princess's private guard, and he had the chance now. Improved salary, travel, promotions, anything. All now possible.

"Lt. Sentry?" He snapped out of it straight into the face of Cadence, now looking somewhat confused. "Are you alright?"

"Uh, yes ma'am. Sorry, just kinda let my mind wander for a second. I guess it's my brain telling me to go to bed. I'm usually relaxing and drifting off about now," Flash explained, not completely lying as he felt his eyelids getting slightly heavy.

"Of course. All I need is an answer, and you could head to your barracks for the night," Cadence said.

"An answer to what?" A suddenly very tired Sentry replied.

"Well, Lt. Flash Sentry, would you like to become one of Princess Sparkle's private guards and be called Capt. Flash Sentry instead?" Flash Sentry grew a large, prideful smile.

"Yes, ma'am," He answered with as much confidence as possible in his sleepy state. Cadence grew a smile of her own and turned to walk towards her original location atop her throne.

"Then your paperwork will be taken care of, and you should get something very soon as confirmation along with instructions, living requirements, salaries, and all that stuff,' Cadence finished, sitting on her haunches and yawning at the end. "If that's all for tonight, I believe I will relax, and you should go ahead and return to the barracks for the night." Flash Sentry nodded.

"Good night, Princess." Sentry said as he opened the door to leave.

"Good night, Lieutenant." Princess Cadence replied as the door banged closed and everything returned to silence as before.

It didn't remain that way long however, as an all-too familiar figure appeared next to her throne with an all-too familiar smile.

"Oh, how fun is this gonna get, my dear? Sending Princess Twilight's little," Discord changed into a little schoolfilly's uniform, "crush straight to her, when you know the truth. Oh Cadence, why didn't you tell me you liked chaos too? I coulda gone out and bought a cake to celebrate." He finished mocking as a cake spontaneously appeared in his hands, presenting it to the pink alicorn. In frosting, It clearly stated "Congratulations, you're a bitch!".

"Shut up, Discord. You know that's not what I mean to do." Cadence retorted, anger quickly rising. She didn't usually get angry, but something about the Spirit if Chaos just naturally made her more agitated than normal.

"Oh, really dear? Then please explain, because I don't get it," Discord replied while drawing out a complex mathematical equation on a large blackboard. He stared at it for a moment, gasped as if he figured it out, and finished the problem accordingly. He turned to look back at Cadence with a happy, slightly cocky grin and received an unamused frown in return. "Fine, be that way." With a snap of his fingers, the blackboard was gone.

"He just needs to be around Twilight again. He'll come around." Cadence said, trying to convince herself as well as the draconequus.

"Really? Well, Miss Love, I think you know as well as I do you can't force love." Discord chuckled, " Well at least not emotional love. Lust is simple, though. Celestia's still butthurt about the cactus 1,200 years ago. 1,200 years ago! I don't know how she's still angry about it. I didn't know it would actually drive her to..."

"Stop!" The alicorn cut him off. "I really don't wanna know." Discord just huffed with a grin.

"Your loss." Suddenly, an alarm clock appeared next to Discord, playing very loudly the MLP Theme. "Oh, would you look at that. I better go, I'm sure dear Fluttershy is looking for me." Discord snapped his fingers, and with a flash he now donned a 3- piece tuxedo with a rose in his front pocket.

"Until next time, Princess," Discord bade farewell as a door appeared next to him. As he opened the door, he stopped halfway through. "Oh, and please keep spreading the love chaos around. It's starting to feel like Hearts and Hooves day around here, and I positively LOVE it." With that, he stepped through the door and closed it with a smack, leaving the Princess of Love once again alone. She got up off her throne and walked to a window adjacent to the one from before, looking towards the direction of Ponyville.

"If Discord knows...," Cadence looked off in the distance. "Then this can't end well."

Two Weeks Later

As the train rumbled down the tracks, Flash Sentry looked beyond the mountains, down towards his destination; a little rural community now infamous throughout Equestria because of one mare. The mare he was supposed to protect.

Not knowing what else to do, he fumbled through his things to find one object in particular. Pulling it out, he examined the picture for the 100th time. It was a picture of the Elements of Harmony, all together in front of Ponyville's Town Square. They were all in their own unique poses, seemingly relative to their personalities.

He, as well as the other guards, had been given the picture to help them identify and remember just who they were protecting. It seemed stupid to Flash Sentry, but he didn't bother complaining. Even though the main target to protect was Princess Sparkle, the other Elements were also to be protected when necessary. They were just as important as the Element of Magic, and were to be taken care of when called upon. They wouldn't hover around them as they would Princess Sparkle, but they would keep an eye out for trouble.

The more he looked at the picture, the more his eyes jumped to one pony in particular, the pony he had ACTUALLY gotten a crush on two months ago. The butterscotch pegasus laying in the center below with her hooves and wings tucked against her body. While her friends around her were laughing and smiling for joy, she seemed content with a closed smile and remaining stationary.

Something about her just got to Flash; she was so adorable the way she acted. When she was at the Crystal Empire, he remembered her being so shy that she wouldn't even answer anyone unless she knew them personally. She was so quiet, so calm.

From what he was informed of, she was the Element of Kindness, which didn't surprise him in the slightest, and she also had a love for animals, something that Flash never really had. He never had any pets growing up, and he never really got involved with other animals at all unless it was for the Guard. They never interested Flash, so he didn't take the time to learn about them.

Well, some things change. he thought as he placed the picture back in his belongings and leaned back in his chair. He wasn't supposed to arrive in Ponyville for another five or so hours, so a good nap was in order. Or at least, that's what Flash thought as he closed his eyes.

You will be mine, Fluttershy.

Author's Note

Written by Shardz solely. (C1, 3-3B)
Edited by Silverlinings.
Suggestions, comments, thoughts, and any grammatical errors down below.
BUM BUM BUUUM! More terrible sex jokes, shameless shipping, and *gasp* a plot of some kind in the next chapter: "F*ckin' Parties and Sex Everywhere, What Did You Expect?" :trollestia:

P.S. For those of you who pay attention to details and break down everything(I do it a lot personally), you probably noticed that this whole scenario makes no sense(as much as it can:ajbemused:) due to one thing: This story doesn't involve Alicorn Twilight. Thus no Princess status, no EG, no Flash Sentry. Well... fuck your logic! Twilight will remain a princess and everything else will remain canon to the S4 finale EXCEPT Twilight will remain a unicorn. Oh, and the library's still intact, as made clear before. I'm not a very good interior designer of large castles. Sorry. Maybe later.
Just wanted to get that out of the way.

F*ckin' Parties and Sex Everywhere, What Did You Expect?

F*ckin' Parties and Sex Everywhere, What Did You Expect?

"Out of Tylenol again? Fuck!"

Rainbow sifted through her medicinal cabinet, sending bottles of all kinds to the floor. She had woken up with a hangover again, just as she had every day for the past three weeks since Twilight's birthday.

Rainbow Dash had ended up taking them all to Ponyville's own strip club for some "fun." The only two that actually ended up having "fun" were Twilight and Pinkie, though Rainbow honestly hadn't been surprised by that. She knew taking her friends and expecting them to like it was a long shot, but hey, it was worth a shot... right?

Was it worth it?

The question that had repeated itself since that night. The question that Rainbow didn't have an answer for. The reason for her uncertainty: Pinkie Pie, Ponyville's one and only party animal, though that definition had been greatly expanded since then.

After Rainbow had taken her there that night, she wanted to go there every night for some fun. At first, Rainbow loved it; she hadn't had anyone be able to keep up with her partying ability in years, and Pinkie had plenty of energy to go on. She could keep going when most others would wuss out, and could outdrink anyone she crossed paths with. She was undefeated in Ponyville, and a few outsiders had poured in from other parts of Equestria to challenge her, but they ended up just like every other challenger; extreme liver damage in the hospital, while Pinkie somehow remained completely functional in every aspect. It was great, and Rainbow felt like she was on top of the world, and she was sure Pinkie felt the same way. Everything was great.

Then shit changed.

While Rainbow knew Pinkie was already "different" in the amount of energy she had as a party animal, she had no idea just how truly powerful of a monster she had created.

After two weeks of partying, Rainbow had asked Pinkie for a day or two off from partying. Just relax for a little bit, and return back to the Pink Pony completely refreshed. Pinkie wanted no part of it, though; she was completely driven to continue partying with no breaks. With her friend refusing to stop, of course Dash didn't want to stop. She'd be lame, and if there's anything Rainbow Danger Dash isn't, it's lame. So, the pegasus sucked it up, and kept going.

The constant partying was just an ingredient to the mix, however. What kicked off the shitstorm was the piece of paper Pinkie receive in the mail 3 days later.

The tab from Berry Punch's deliveries, which now amounted to a little over 22,000 bits.

With the high of partying dulling their senses, Pinkie and Dash both continued to spend bits for their partying needs. Rainbow wasn't in anything serious, though. While she had elevated her expenses partying with Pinkie, it was still perfectly controllable with her saved up cache of bits and great income as the captain of the Weather Team of Ponyville.

Pinkie was not so fortunate, however. While Rainbow had experience as a partier and had already knew to be at least somewhat careful with money at parties, Pinkie didn't. She shelled out cash faster than Diamond Tiara in a candy store, paying for the starting shots, then putting everything else on a tab. The worst part was that the "everything else" was the binge-drinking alcohol, which she kept buying from Berry Punch, who was already overpriced to begin with. Drinking anywhere between 20-70 bottles of the stuff a night meant between 1,000 to almost 3,000 a night, something not affordable of a baker.

Pinkie had shown the paper to Rainbow Dash first, not wanting to worry the Cakes or the rest of her friends yet. Rainbow Dash was just as worried as she was, though, and just as clueless. RD had about 12,000 bits saved up in total, Pinkie about 7,000. A good amount combined, but not enough to satisfy the tab.

To finish off the shitstorm of trouble, Pinkie still wanted to party. She still wanted to keep going. Everytime Rainbow brought up the tab, Pinkie broke down emotionally in tears and made Dash feel terrible, but as soon as she got the chance she'd take another chance to live the high life.

As Rainbow finished drinking a cup, she began to search her house for any "guests." Finding none, she found her thoughts echoing the same question over and over.

Was it worth it?

"Pinkie, we need to talk," Rainbow Dash said, rather forcefully at her friend, who was laying on her front yard, wearing ALL the Mardigras beads, along with red shutter shades.

"Oh... hey Dashies..." Pinkie smiled, as shit faced as ever, up at what she presumed to be three Rainbow Dash's side by side.

"Christ....Dash faced hoofed herself, before helping the binged out pink mare to her feet.

"Hey, I'm gettin' better at this hungedover sheet...." Pinkie remarked, leaning from side to side, "I di'int fall down, this times."

"Pinkie Pie, really, we need to talk about your bill," The pegasus began saying to Pinkie.

"SSSsssssshhhhhh..." Pinkie hushed at Rainbow, "If you talk too loud, my ear holes'll get pissy and make my head hurt."

"Dammit Pinkie..." RD muttered to herself. "Alright," She continued, in a softer tone, "I think I have a solution to your problem."

"..." Pinkie stared vacantly at Dash.

"Pinkie?" She waved her hoof in front of the earth mare. "Pinkie?!"

"... Your voice... is so damn obnoxious..." Pinkie began smiling from ear to ear at her comment. "Like... really Dashie, damn. You sound like a squeaker who smokes a pack of cigs a day." She began giggling.

"Enough of this shit," Rainbow Dash said, bluntly. She walked over to the side of Pinkie's house, grabbed the hose, and began water-logging her friend. After several minutes of drenching, Rainbow turned the water off and approached Pinkie.

"Feeling better?" Rainbow asked smugly, as Pinkie laid on the ground, clenching her head with her hooves.

"Owie, my head..." She complained as she got to her hooves.

"So listen, I think I've found a solution to your money wows," Rainbow informed.

"Yeah?" Pinkie asked, still rubbing her throbbing temples. "And what's that?"

"So you like the Pink Pony right?" Rainbow asked, double checking her facts.

"Yeah..." Pinkie said, "Listen Dashie, I need to get an ice pack or something, so whatever your plan is, I'm sure it'll work. I'm all for it, whatever." Pinkie turned and began staggering towards her front door.

"Great!" Rainbow cried. "You start working at the Pink Pony tomorrow night!"

"Wow Dashie, this outfit is really silly!"

"Pinkie, just... uh...." Dash trailed off, not sure what to say. Tonight was Pinkie's first night, and she was putting on her "performance uniform" for the first time. Right in front of Dash.

Pinkie was wearing a baker's outfit, of course, but it made her the sexiest goddamn baker that Dash had ever seen. The apron around her neck that covered her front was small and looked to be easy to rip off in a moment. The baker's hat was unnecessary, at least to Dash, but something did seem a little sexy about it.

The sexiest part of the outfit though, and admittedly the strangest, was the stockings. Rainbow Dash was pretty sure a baker didn't normally wear stockings, but obviously that wasn't the point. The stockings were striped, red and white, complimenting her pink fur in a way that Rainbow hadn't even thought of. They were extremely long, almost reaching up to her barrel, but that just seemed to add to the eroticism.

"Dashie, helllllo?" Pinkie called out, snapping Rainbow out of her trance. It took a second for Rainbow to respond as she tried to relax her wings, which had gone impossibly stiff.

"Uh... yeah, Pinkie. Look, I'm gonna go ahead and go. I'll see ya later, ok?" Dash said, trying to get out of there as fast as possible.

"Okie dokie lokie! See ya!" Pinkie replied, seemingly oblivious to Dash's growing wingboner. Dash left as soon as the words left her mouth, leaving the baker all to herself. That was, until a mint-colored pony walked into the room to join her in changing into an outfit of some kind.

"Hi, Lyra! I didn't know you worked here, too!" Pinkie greeted.

"Yeah, I do, me and Bonnie both." Lyra said while examining Pinkie's outfit. "Since when did you start working here?"

"Oh, tonight's my first night! Oh, this is gonna be so much fun! Or wait, is it going to be fun?" Pinkie said, her mood dropping drastically. "Oh no! What if it's not fun? What if I mess up?! What if..." Pinkie's rambling was cut off by Lyra's hoof to her mouth.

"Whoa, calm down, Pinkie. Everything's gonna be fine." Lyra put a hoof on her shoulder in reassurance. "There's just a couple things you'll have to learn to make it here. Maybe the other girls and I can teach you but, somethings you'll have to learn on your own." This just earned a slightly less concerned but more confused look from Pinkie.

"Things to learn? Like what?" Pinkie asked.

"Well, first off..." Lyra started, but was interrupted by the appearance of a familiar white earth pony with a nurse's hat on her head.

"Lyra, you got a high-roller! He's paying quite a bit for the time, so you might wanna hurry up!" Redheart said before leaving. Lyra got up to go see her client, but not before turning to Pinkie with an apologetic smile.

"Sorry Pinkie, but I gotta take this. I don't know how long this'll take, so I'll see you later." Lyra said her goodbyes before beginning to walk towards the door. Pinkie still had more questions, however.

"But wait, Lyra, what if I mess up something really bad, and..." Pinkie began to ramble again.

"Are you still on that? You'll be fine, Pinkie!" Lyra assured.

"But what if I..." Lyra just shook her head, and her horn began to glow. A nearby cabinet became enveloped in the same color as Lyra's horn, and opened revealing a small collection of different objects. Two of them began to glow as well, and floated towards Pinkie.

"Here, just take this. It'll help relax you a bit for your first night. Just light the end of the roll with the lighter, and take a small breath of the fumes," Lyra explained, "It'll be a little strange at first, but it'll help, trust me. You aren't the first pony to be nervous here," A small smile grew on Lyra's face, "Just don't worry. I'm sure you'll do fine." With that, the unicorn left, leaving the earth pony alone in the dressing room.

Pinkie looked at the rolled up paper in her left hoof and the magical lighter in her right. Shrugging her shoulders as if to say "fuck it, what could go wrong?", she flicked the lighter's ignition switch until a small orange flame appeared. She lowered the end of the paper into the flame until the paper caught fire and a pleasant scent filled the air.

She raised the joint to her mouth, and took a huff.

"And I said, are you crazy?"

Pinkie was currently sitting in the lap of a stallion with half of her outfit off and a large kitchen knife that she continued to swing aimlessly in her drug-induced state. The stallion now really wished he had just gone with the nurse at this point.

"No, I think you're crazy! Watch where you swing that knife, dammit!" The stallion said while dodging a swing that came uncomfortably close to his neck. Pinkie simply giggled at the stallion's complaining, though not the normal Pinkie giggle. Instead, it was a small chuckle, most likely caused by the top grade marijuana coursing through her veins and somehow relaxing the energetic party pony.

"Silly, this isn't a knife. It's a..." the baker began, but suddenly seemed to fall asleep, leaving the stallion in a wonderful situation to handle. Luckily for the stallion, a certain musician happened to pass through the room and saw the knocked-out pony.

"Pinkie!" Lyra called out, running up to the seat and lifting up the mare in her magic. She lowered the pink pony to the floor to begin an examination. The stallion watched all this happen in front of him, and began to wonder whether he should run for it or knock her out as well.

"Yep, overload." Lyra concluded, the smell of weed filling her nostrils through Pinkie's mouth. "Really surprising though, I coulda' sworn she snorted two or three kilos of cocaine a day. Huh, guess ya learn something new every day." Lyra spoke out loud to no one in particular. The sounds of distancing hoof-steps met her ears, and she turned to find the stallion nowhere to be found.

"Hey, sir!" Lyra called out. No answer came back. She simply shrugged and picked up Pinkie in her magic again. "Eh, oh well. His loss."

With party pony in tow, Lyra began to head to the backroom to get the OD'd pony some relief, but not before a voice stopped her. A voice that could sound so sweet, but yet so bitter when the owner wanted it to. A voice that she fell in love with, but yet sometimes hated more than Tartarus itself.

"Lyra, why did I just walk into you and Pinkie, who's unconscious right now?" Bon-Bon seemed to growl at the unicorn, who was now stumbling over her words, trying to word an explanation. Nothing came, leaving her looking guiltier by the second. She finally just gave up and stopped making noise at all, leaving a single thought in her brain.

Fuck me.

The three of them calmly headed into the backroom, where no costumer would see. After several moments of dead silence, one mare glaring, the other tongue tied, Bon-Bon spoke once more, "Lyra, I'm going to give you to the count of three, to explain what the hell is going on." The cotton candy maned mare spoke clearly, not raising her voice. "One..."

"It's not what it looks like!" Lyra blurted out, almost immediately.

Bon-Bon raised one eyebrow, skeptically. "Then what, pray tell, is Pinkie Pie wearing?" She peered over the mint green mare at the less-than-scantily clad pink pony.

"Oh, uh, you see," Lyra began to explain, as beads of sweat rolled down her face, "P-Pinkie's working here now, and I just thought I'd help her, by-"

Bon-Bon gasped, cutting Lyra off. "By taking advantage of her?!" She proclaimed as she jumped to her perverse conclusion. "I bet you drugged her, too, didn't you; with your 'medicinal herbs'?!"

"What? No! You see... well... uh," Lyra began to think of an excuse, until she and Bon-Bon both noticed the half smoked joint sitting on the table, at the same time.

"Shit..." The mint unicorn muttered, under her breath. She quickly looked up at her partner, "Bonnie, listen, I-!"

"No," The cream mare interrupted. "I don't want to hear anymore excuses. The drinking I was fine with; the smoking was pushing it; but this, Lyra? What possessed you to do such a thing?"

"I was just trying to get Pinkie to relax and get comfortable..." Lyra tried once again to explain, until she realized how badly she worded it this time.

Bon-Bon looked a mixture of horrified and disgusted, but still managed to keep her proper appearance. She took a deep breath and, trying to speak calmly though her voice was shaky, she simply said, "We're going to have a long talk at home, later," And that was that. Bon-Bon left the room, leaving Lyra to clean up the mess she'd made out of Pinkie.

Earlier that day

Twilight walked through Ponyville with Spike listing off her royal duties as his duty as her number one assistant. However, his engrossment in the list of duties prevented him from seeing the growing look of annoyance on the alicorn's face.

"... Then you have to sign off on some papers for your..." Spike stopped, reread the next few words, then giggled and continued, "your allowance from the Royal Treasury." Spike burst out laughing. "You have an allowance now, Twilight?! I guess becoming a princess has its perks, doesn't it?" Twilight was not so happy, however.

"Yes, ha ha, so funny, Spike. Now will you keep reading, already?" Twilight glared at Spike, wiping the smile off his face quickly.

"Geez, fine. Princess of Friendship maybe, but definitely not the Princess of Fun," Spike grumbled before reading aloud again, "Arrange a court for questions from any and all subjects. Prepare for travel to Canterlot in two days for diplomatic summit..." The pair arrived home, the dragon not even noticing. Before, he could walk into the door however, the door was surrounded by a purplish glow and opened, giving the young drake entrance.

"...Recheck barracks, making sure all guards are accounted for and any problems with living arrangements are resolved and accommodated for..." Spike droned on, a slight twitch flickering in Twilight's right eye, "...Prepare Ponyville for Nightmare Night in a week..." Finally, the alicorn snapped.

"WHAT NEXT, CELESTIA? WANT ME TO MAKE A NEW ASTRAL BODY IN THE SKY BY NEXT TUESDAY?" Twilight yelled at no one in particular in anger, causing Spike to drop the list on the ground in fear.

Celestia was enjoying her afternoon cup of tea with her sister when that familiar feeling hit her. She stopped drinking her tea for a moment before continuing to sip. However, her sister knew better.

"Sister, I thought you deactivated that ridiculous spell on thyself already," Luna chided, no small amount of disapproval in her words.

"Luna, we've already been over this. I need to know whenever somepony or something speaks my name in case of a threat against my kingdom's security," Celestia answered bluntly before raising her cup to another sip, but found no liquid left in the fine china.

"But how would..."Luna started, but gave up halfway through. She just shook her head in confusion and annoyance and left the gardens to head back to her observatory, leaving her sister with a victorious smile and empty teacups.

"Oh, foolish, foolish Luna, I..." She started to say, but then looked down at the tea set left behind. "Wait, Luna! It's your turn to clean up the..." She stopped calling out, her sister far too gone to hear her. She began picking up the many components of the tea set in her magic while swearing under her breath, "Tartarus damnit."

Twilight sighed before attempting damage control.

"Sorry Spike, just... I have a lot of new responsibilities as a princess, and I guess it's starting to get to me," Twilight tried to apologize.

"It's alright Twilight, just don't do it again. So... do you want me to continue reading the list, or just leave it for later?" Twilight thought for a moment, weighing the pros and cons of leaving the chores for later, but her overstressed mind won out.

"Later, Spike. Right now, I'm just going to go catch up on my studies of Equestrian Rulers from ancient to modern times," Twilight said glumly as she lifted a tome off of a nearby shelf in her magic and opened it to a page with a magical bookmark. Spike watched as the alicorn simply read the book with a bored expression for at least a minute before Twilight realized he was still there.

"Yes, Spike?" Twilight asked with annoyance.

"Twilight, is something wrong?" Spike asked.

"No. Why?" Twilight responded almost defensively.

"You haven't been acting like yourself lately. You've been really moody and weird for a while, and never seem to be happy. The last time I can even remember you with a smile was..." Spike pondered, "A couple of weeks ago when you got that new textbook from Celestia, I think. Something's gotta be bothering you."

Twilight tried to come up with a reasonable excuse as fast as should, but she finally just gave in to her assistant.

"Yeah, I know Spike. It's just that between my studies," Twilight rose her book in the air, "and these new duties I have as princess," The piece of parchment in Spike's hand levitated to join the textbook in mid-air, "I can't ever seem to find the time to do anything fun, not even hang out with my friends, even though I'm the Princess of Friendship in the first place!"

"Well, why don't you write a letter to Celestia, Twi? You know, tell her you wanna take a break from your studies for a while? Maybe you could even ask her to give you less stuff to do as Princess?" Spike suggested. Twilight just sighed.

"Believe me Spike, I've thought of it, but that wouldn't work." Twilight bluntly reflected before returning the levitating textbook to its original place in front of her and the list onto a nearby desk.

"Why wouldn't it work?" Spike asked.

"Because if I ask for a reduction in my duties Spike, she might think I'm not responsible enough to be a princess in the first place. I have to get used to all these new responsibilities and be able to fill my roles as a ruler for probably my whole life. I'm a princess now, and there's no going back now. If spending less time with my friends is a consequence, I'll just have to live with it." Twilight concluded. While Spike tried to figure out what to say, she opened her textbook and flipped back to her magical bookmark. A simple spell, and the bookmark was gone.

"Well Twi, I don't know what to tell you. I'm gonna go make dinner, though. Anything you want in particular?" Spike asked. The words didn't seem to register to the alicorn however, as she was already engrossed in her book. Spike spoke again, a little louder, "Twi? I..."

"No thanks, Spike. Whatever you make will be fine," Answered Twilight without her eyes leaving the page. Spike just sighed and headed for the kitchen to figure out what he could make tonight.

"Pinkie... Piiiiinkie..."

The pink pony slowly opened her eyes and in her immediate view was a mint green unicorn, with large, amber eyes. "Oh..." She giggled, "Hey Lyra."

"Oh thank Celestia!!" Lyra flopped onto her back, exasperated. "I thought you'd croaked 'r something."

"What happened?" Pinkie sat up and surveyed her surroundings. She was in the changing room at the Pink Pony.

"Well..." Lyra went on to explain Pinkie's passing out while on the job and, although it wasn't really her business, the tight spot she was in with her filly friend because of it.

"ooooooooh, I'm so sorry Lyra!" Pinkie, being the overly emotional mare she was, was nearly in tears. "This is all my fault!"

"I'm sure it'll be alright Pinkie, really," the green unicorn reassured.

"No nonononono!" Pinkie waved her hoof in Lyra's face, "I need to make this right... Riiiight after I finish with that stallion." Pinkie said, recalling her session with a tall, yellow stallion that was interrupted half way through. "Who was he? What was his name?" She grabbed Lyra by the shoulders and shook her, violently.

"Uhh..." Lyra thought, "Lucid Gaze I think." She pried herself away from Pinkie's iron grip.

"Lucid Gaze! Got it!" Pinkie shouted with a gleam of determination in her eye. With one swift movement, she shed the rest of her costume and was out the back door in a mere five seconds flat.

"Wait, Pinkie!" Lyra called. however, the party pony was already a block down the road. "... Thought you'd like to know where to find him..."

Shit... I've seen that look before. That Lucid is one poor bastard...

The neon lights of the red light district illuminated the entire road. As ~~Rainblow Hash~~ Rainbow Dash entered the Pink Pony, she was met by a very familiar face. "Apple Jack?"

The earth pony she was talking to flinched and turned around, a beet red complexion on her face. "Uhh..." She gulped, "Hey there... Rainbow Dash. Heh... fancy seein' you here."

"Yeah, I'm just here to check on Pinkie; she's working here now," RD explained, nonchalantly.

"Oh, uh... is that so?" AJ glanced around, beads of sweat trickling down her face.

"So what brings you here? I thought you'd had enough of this place." RD nudged AJ in the side, "Guess you couldn't resist, huh?"

"Uh yeah..." Luckily for AJ, she was saved my the arrival of a waitress, ready to serve her, like a five star restaurant. "Any ol' booth's fine," The farm pony told her. The two of them began walking down the rows until they came across an empty booth. "This's fine."

"Anything you need before you get started?" The waitress asked.

"Actually," AJ answered, "do you know if Braeburn's still working here?" She could feel how warm and red her face was getting.

"Actually yes, he is," The waitress smiled. "I can send him your way, immediately."

"Thank ya..." Apple Jack was then left alone for some time.

After what seemed like the most awkward eternity ever, a yellow stallion entered the booth, cleaning his face with a moist towel. Using his magic, he shut the blinds and hopped up onto the table. Because of said towel, he couldn't see who had called on him. "Alright, sexy, you rea.... dy..." He dropped the towel and saw his cousin, looking extremely red and biting her lower lip.

"Uh... Brae...." she said, her voice quivering, "we need to chat."

"Uh..." Braeburn hated where this was going, "... Alright, ah guess." He lowered himself into the booth.

The two of them sat, awkwardly, across from each other.

"Alright... uh... Brae..." AJ cleared her throat, "Ah... uh.. aw shit..." She had no way to dance around such a delicate subject. So she decided to be as straight forward as possible.

She took a deep breath and said, "Braeburn. Ah'm pregnant."

Author's Note

Edited by Pegasi Bob and Reasoningmage0.