My little pony: friendship is facinating

by arkman575

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1516

We know the ponies of Equestria to be a rather amusing race of pastel colored equines who seem to have the world nearly end a few too many times. What would our fave ponies look like in the eyes of another nation?

Equestira: Land of the ponies. This is all we really need to say about our favorite equines. I mean we can mention how Rainbow Dash is 20% cooler, or how Fluttershy is best pony. But that's all we really need.

However, how would a nation living within the same realm of the pony-verse see our little color-coated quadrupeds? This is the logs of a watcher for a such nation. What will a watchful wolf think of these innocent ponies?

Published 2014-08-09 13:10:02 UTC
Last updated 2014-08-09 13:10:02 UTC

Prolog

June 2nd
Notification of acceptance

-To the director of wolven intelligence:

I wish to send you this note of gratitude for being selected for the task that you have assigned me. I have found that the surveillance of the ponies ~~would be~~ is our highest priority regarding national security. I am rather surprised that I was chosen, however. When I first applied for the program, it called for a canine with survival talents and much knowledge of the nation of Equileria (hopefully that was spelled correctly). I am not trying to show any displeasure for my assignment, only that me being chosen is a rather poor decision as I have little knowledge in both.

I will fallow your your orders and stick to whatever plan you have lined up for me. If the surveillance of the equines and their princess is vital to our nation and it’s inhabitants, then I shall not falter.

In preparation to serve our nation,
Tiber Fang- Wolven intel

June 5th
Acquisition of Target

-To the director of wolven intelligence:

As instructed, I received much information on the ponies and their homeland. Again, I must thank you for aiding me prep for the mission at hand. In the files given to me, I also received my main target of interest: a purple mare by the name of Twilight Sparke. I assume this to be a bit of a joke played upon me as for my last letter describing my lack of knowledge on ponies. I admit, I am a bit of a ‘dunce’ when it comes to these equens, but I know a fraud name when I hear one. No living being is named with such utter lack of realism.

With a smug grin to your humer,
Tiber Fang- Wolven intel

June 5th
30 minutes later
Addendum

-To the director of wolven intelligence:

Well... I have just been informed my superiors that the name ‘Twilight Sparkle’ is in fact a real name. I wish to apologize for my accusation of it being a joke, and withdraw my smug comment.

Although, in retrospect, it is a rather odd name to be given if you consider it. I hope you understand.

With a lack of smugness,
Tiber Fang- Wolven intel

June 15th
Departure
-To the director of wolven intelligence:

As I write this note, I am boarding a military aircraft headed for the nation of Equestria. I have been given ample supplies, resources, maps, and training so that I can live and watch over the target. As suggested, I brought along a few weapons for self defence if I am discovered. I know that if my body is found that you would disavow knowing of my mission.

Repeating my mission to you as to give confirmation, I am to log day by day events of my
HVT (high value target) and then give my analysis of what these events have in significance to the safety of our nation. As of now, I am a lone wolf.

In hopes of safety in my future,
Tiber Fang- Wolven intel

Author's Note

This was an idea I've had for a while, and only now do I begin writing it. Hope you enjoy.

Friendship is Magic, Part 1

June 19th
11:00 A.M. local time
Arrival

-To the director of wolven intelligence:

I regret my silence since arriving in Equestria, as I had a rather long hike from the drop zone to the nation’s capital. Apparently my pilot didn’t realise that the town of Ponyville was not the main city of ponies. It was just an agricultural village. The main capitale, where the mare known as Twilight resides, is about three fourths the way atop a mountain. Canterlot, the capital, is also home to the princess of the ponies. It was to be expected that the student of the princess would be in the same city.

As to why I was delayed, I had to scale that mountain with my entire supplies. Thankfully, the trek is over and I have set up a small enclosure for myself not too far from the city. I begin my search for the mare this afternoon.

PS: please do demote that ignorant flight jockey!

In preparation for surveillance,
Tiber Fang- Wolven intel

June19th
3:00 P.M.
First observations

-To the director of wolven intelligence:

As instructed, I have been keeping a low profile while acquiring my target. Needless to say, there have been no incidences finding the purple mare. At first observation, I was wondering if I had tracked down the right mare, as she was muttering to herself while looking at a picture book. Looking back to my notes about the mare, it indeed was Twilight. Her butt emblem matches the one listed in her profile.

To continue, she seemed to be looking at pictures depicting Equestria’s past. From what I could pick up from her low tone, it had to do with a nobel lunar goddess being stuck down by her overpowering sister. She was said to be imprisoned on the moon. Either this is just a legend, or our lunar teams will find something interesting when they arrive on the summer solstice.

After finishing her picture book, the mare proceeded to return to her residence. Along the way, she was encouraged by a group of strangers to partake in a social gathering. Twilight seemed to be preoccupied about the return of the sun witch, so she had to decline. Even though the strangers seemed to be the mare’s ‘friends’, they seemed to mock her for her advanced studies. Rather odd if you ask me.

At her return, she and her reptilianne servant (yes, they seem to still consider slavery of lizards accepted) began to search their archives for something relevant to the picture book. Nothing worth noting happened, besides harshe abuse of the lizard. Eventually, they found a book of scribbled lines. After talking to each other for a bit, the unicorn dictated a letter to the princess about her findings on the lunar god’s imprisonment. However, the princess denied the even existence of the story, saying it was just a pup’s tail. The letter also instructed the mare to go to the town of Ponyville...

I urgently request that you allow we to stay here for a while and pick up anything the princess might have to say about the legend. It would be a waste of time and effort if I were to scale down the mountain tomorrow just to track down one mare.

In hopes of a sympathetic future,
Tiber Fang- Wolven intel

June 20th
7:00 P.M.
Ponyville

-To the director of wolven ~~hell~~ intelligence:

Even after scaling the mountain yesterday... you not only order me descend back down today, but to hike all the way back to that ponytown with all my supplies? Now I see why no one signed up for this job.

Well, two can play at that game. They have a train. As I am writing this, I am in a cargo container aboard a train headed to my target destination. I should be there before long and then I can get back to the mission you assigned me to.

Oh, and thanks again for not telling me about the train as I was walking across miles of farmland.

Enroute to Ponyville,
Tiber Fang- Wolven intel

June 21st
4:00 A.M.
Longest day and night

-To the director of wolven intelligence:

Ok, someone sent me the wrong files this time around. I am getting sick and tired of being the laughing stalk for you. This mare isn’t a royal student, she is a party animal! Ever since I arrived at the town, the so called library has been playing every style of music imaginable at levels that are nearly making me death. I'm about a quarter mile from the place, and I can barely hear myself think. This has been going on all night!

At least I can watch the lunar teams’ approach on the moon. The sub-light engines can be seen from even here.

In request for the right documentation,
Tiber Fang- Wolven intel

June 21st
6:00 A.M.
Summer solstice

-To the director of wolven intelligence:

Well... shit hit the fan here. Where to begin... First off, apparently the ponies assume their princess can raise and lower the sun and moon. I care to believe otherwise. On the summer solstice, the princess was to show up and perform the act publicly. She was nowhere to be seen. However, I do have some good news. Apparently, the Lunar goddess is real and actually did retune. She even granted the wolves warmth in the sun while the ponies who betrayed her stay in the shadows. I would have bowed down before her, it it weren't for the princess’s guards attacking lunar goddess. Seeing she was still threatened by the mortal ponies, she fled to the near by forest to regain her full power. I shall pursue her in an attempts to gain an alliance with her for the Wolven Empire.

In hopes of a new lunar rule,
Tiber Fang- Wolven intel