Shared Feelings

Chapters

Morning Routine
Tea Time
And a Picnic
Alcohol Talks
Paradise is a Lie
Into the Unknown
Face Your Fears

Morning Routine

It was just another normal day; well, besides the fact that Twilight was coming to visit later. It was nothing too important though. We were just going to have some tea and chat, simple and relaxing. I truly loved the days in which my usual schedule wasn’t interrupted by anything vaguely excited.

Yes, I know, to most ponies, excitement is a good thing. It keeps things going. It “gets you out of a rut,” so to speak. Of course a little excitement was never a bad thing, but too much; well, it turned me into a nervous wreck. Besides, I enjoyed my daily routine enough to not really ever get bored with it. The animals always tended to change things up anyways.

It started out with breakfast, not for me, (that was later) but for the animals at the cottage. As you may know, (if not, it’s okay, that’s why I’m explaining) almost all of the animals that lived at my home weren’t my pets. Most of the critters who were there at the time either came to me with an illness, or just needed a helping hoof. Life for them could be much harder than a pony’s at times.

Anyways, I don’t want to bore you. So time to get back on track. I woke up with the sun as I always did. It shone brightly through my bedroom window, its intense rays already warming my face. I tried my best to be quiet, and not to be bragging, but I’m pretty good at quiet. There were plenty of early risers in the cottage, but some liked to sleep in. After making up my bed, I slowly made my way downstairs. Only the softest of clacks came from my hooves as they made contact with the wooden surface.

I raised a hoof to those awake, their small little eyes shining brightly and excitedly at my appearance, and gave a “shush,” as not to get them talking when others needed their sleep. I then made my way to the kitchen, a variety of rodents, birds, and mammals following close behind.

It may not have looked the best, and I’m sure Rarity would have a fit about proper house care, but I had piles upon piles of many different foods for each and every critter who might make an appearance in large, labeled sacks. Of course there were also plenty of fresh foods which I had to prepare for them as well.

After making the critters line up in an orderly fashion, I began to fill their bowls. This had become such a regular routine, that it gave me time to think. I was very, and I mean very excited for Twilight to come visit. It was very rare that just the two of us got to spend any time together. I loved to see all of my friends, of course, but spending one on one time with anypony almost never happened.

Pinkie Pie would always spend time with Rainbow Dash. If Rainbow Dash wasn’t with Pinkie, she was hanging out with Applejack. If Applejack wasn’t with Rainbow, she’d normally be spending time with Rarity. They always argued, but it was the friendly kind. Rarity and I would sometimes spend time together, but she was the only one. As for Twilight, it was rare for her to spend personal one on one time with just about anypony. Whenever she had a plan to go do something, it always involved everypony, or everypony ended up coming anyways.

I’m not sure exactly what it was about her, but I tended to feel a much stronger bond between the two of us than anypony else in the group; that is, if it was just the two of us. When we were in a group, she seemed…more distant? So this was going to be quite the treat. Finally, I’d get to spend some time with her, and just her…well, the animals too of course.

I could feel butterflies in my stomach from just the thought of having her sitting on the couch with me and sipping at her tea, speaking with such an adorable voice, and the sweetest of words. Her smile was contagious; and her eyes were ones that I tended to lose myself in before shying away, and looking someplace else… I liked her as more than a friend, and had for quite some time. She was just so amazing in almost every way. I could feel the fluttering grow stronger and stronger, and my cheeks heating up with a blush.

I looked down and realized that the bowl I had been filling was overflowing with small pellets of food, which quickly tumbled down the large mound I had created. Each and every one of the critters was staring at me with concern.

“Oh, I’m so sorry, little ones. I must have just gotten lost in my thoughts,” I explained to them with a sheepish smile as I scooped much of the mound back into the sack which it had come from.

The soft patter of a paw against the counter filled my ears, and I looked down to see a scowling little bunny staring up at me. His empty dish was placed directly in front of him, and bits of the other critters’ food were scattered messily all across the countertop. He, of course, refused to snack on any of that. He was always such a picky one. Normally, I would tell Angel to wait his turn. Especially if I considered the fact that I could tell by his squinted and glazed over eyes, that he’d just woken up; but then he would refuse, and we would argue. I simply didn’t have the time to argue with him that day.

So with a sigh of defeat, I filled his bowl with some crisp, delicious looking lettuce I had bought the previous day. I then mixed in an array of vegetables, including plenty of carrots to make a bright, colorful looking salad. He smiled with thanks as I placed it back down in front of him, and began chomping away at his meal.

Luckily, Twilight was an early riser just like me. That’s why she scheduled our little get together to be somewhat later that morning. I could feel the butterflies return to my belly at the thought. I was getting nervous and excited all at the same time for a simple get together. This is exactly why I don’t like things more exciting than that. Just look at what it was doing to me.

A nice, warm shower would calm my nerves. I needed to take one anyways, after all. After supplying each of the critters with their allotted meals for breakfast, I quickly made my way to the bathroom. Sitting through hour after hour of the cool night, the tile floor had grown cold. I gasped softly as my front hooves touched down against its frigid surface. My body shivered ever so slightly, coxing me to hurry even more so into the shower.

The sound of spraying water echoed through the room as I switched the hot water pouring from the tub’s faucet, up to the shower head. I took in a deep breath of warm steam as clouds of it emerged, and spread through the room.

As I stepped into its powerful, massaging stream, and closed the curtain behind me, I was engulfed by its soaking heat. I simply stood still for a minute, or possibly two, enjoying the relaxing sensation as water dripped from my fur and mane. I had little time though, Twilight would be coming soon.

I once again lost myself in my well-worn routine as thoughts of my soon to be guest filled my mind. What would she say if I told her my true feelings? Would she be shocked, disgusted, uncomfortable, or maybe all of those at once? Would she admit she felt the same? If not, would she at least be willing to give it a try? I could imagine myself pleading as I try to hold back my tears. “Oh, Twilight, please just one date? …I-it doesn’t have to be anything special…I mean, um, unless you want it to be…and, um, er… I’m so sorry, Twilight… I never meant to make things awkward between us. I just… I just couldn’t hold back my feelings any longer… but maybe I should have…”

Even in the steamy embrace of the shower, I still shuddered at the thought, goose bumps causing my fur to stand on end. I could never tell her something like that, ever. If I somehow ended up making her like me too, she would have to be the one to act first. I’d just have to be stuck waiting… or maybe it was just better to try forgetting.

Anyways, there would be none of me asking that, or even thinking about it when she came to visit. It was just easier that way. There would be no worries, no stress, no awkwardness; none of it, exactly the way I like.

I tried my best to push the thoughts from my mind as I scrubbed shampoo through my waterlogged mane; massaging my hooves against my scalp to help it bubble up more quickly. My mane was so long and thick, that I always had to scrub it about three times before it actually felt clean. Then came the conditioner to keep my mane so silky and smooth. I loved it that way. It was just so soft and silky.

Finally, my mind started to focus on what needed to be done before Twilight’s visit, rather than what may or may not happen during it. I still had to clean up all of the bowls I used for breakfast, feed all the other critters which hadn’t gotten up yet, wash their bowls, and feed myself. Then I had to tidy up before Twilight came. I didn’t want the critters and I to look like slobs, after all. I also had to start warming water for our tea…and decide what tea we were going to have in the first place…oh my, what a busy day.

I could feel my heart beginning to pound as I quickened the scrubbing motion of my hoof against my body. I was running out of time, and I hadn’t even finished showering yet. Maybe Twilight being an early riser wasn’t such a lucky break after all… but at the same time, waiting around all day would be even worse, and make me even more nervous. I sucked in a deep breath of air, and breathed out slowly in an attempt to calm myself. “Everything will be fine… at least, I hope,” I mumbled to myself.

Tea Time

I gasped as a sudden trifecta of assertive knocks flowed into my ears. Twilight was already there, and I had barely even started on the mess of dishes I had made. “Oh my…goodness,” I mumbled beneath my breath as I quickly wiped the suds from my hooves.

I took in a deep breath of air to calm myself, along with pushing away the worries of what she’d think of the mess; and the fact that I wasn’t even close to being prepared for her visit. I gave myself a quick shake and trotted to the door.

“Hello, Twilight,” I said softly as I opened the door, her smiling face and lavender fur glinting in the morning sun.

“Hey, Fluttershy, how are you?” she asked with a chipper tone.

I was stressed, very stressed. Yet that smile of hers was already calming me down. It was amazing; she was amazing. Of course, I wasn’t going to say that. “Oh…I’m good,” I managed to mumble out, still lost in my thoughts and worries.

“Are you sure about that?” she asked, raising her eyebrow smugly, and causing my heartbeat to quicken. “You seem even more nervous than usual. Is everything okay?”

“Yes…” I quickly shook my head. “No, I mean, it’s just that the animals have kept me so busy this morning that I’ve barely had time to prepare myself for your visit. I hope you don’t mind.” Getting that out of my system released some of the tension, and I finally remembered to invite her inside. The door creaked ever so slightly as I opened it wide, and then motioned my hoof for her to enter.

“Don’t worry about it,” Twilight said sweetly as she stepped into my home, and used her magic to close the door behind her. “I may have accidentally come a little bit early.” She gave me a sheepish smile.

“Oh, okay then,” I said softly. At least I now had some form of excuse for my unpreparedness. “I’ll go start making the tea. I was already going to have it almost finished when you arrived, but…”

“Like I said, it’s fine,” she assured me as she followed me to the kitchen. A mess of bowls laid in the form of an unsteady pile in the sink, crumbs of food still clinging to their surface.

“And I do apologize for the mess. I just finished feeding the critters. I’m sure you don’t want to see all those dirty bowls… should I clean them up for you?”

“Fluttershy,” Twilight said with a smirk, and rolled her eyes at me playfully. “It’s okay. If you’re really that worried about the dishes, I can get started on them while you make the tea.”

“What?” I mumbled softly. I felt horrible. It was as if I had somehow tricked her into cleaning up the mess I’d made. “Oh, no, no… I never meant for you to… there’s no need to do that.” As I finished, it was already too late. With a few quick zaps of her horn, the sink was filling with soapy water, and she was already busily scrubbing away at one of the dishes.

“Consider it a thank you for the tea. Besides, what are friends for, after all? I’m sure you’d do just the same for me.

“Oh, yes, of course.” I wasn’t quite sure if she was truly doing it as a favor, or her OCD was kicking in. Her library was always spotless, after all. “Can I sneak in there, please?” I asked through my teeth as I carried my well used kettle to the sink. Twilight nodded her head and stepped aside as I filled it, then went back to washing as I made my way to the stove.

“It must take a lot of energy to care for all of these critters on your own. I’m not sure how you can do it alone,” Twilight said in marvel, causing my cheeks to grow red.

“Oh, it’s just what I do best… Although, it would be nice to have somepony else around to help. There’s times when I have so many critters here, that I have a hard time tending to them all.” Was that possibly a hint? Was she interested in helping me? I was sure it wasn’t. If it was, she’d simply just say so, being the straightforward pony that she was. “Anyways, what kind of tea would you like?” I asked as I dug out multiple cartons from the cupboard, and set them on the counter.

Finishing up the last of bowl, Twilight pulled the plug from the sink to let it drain, and walked over to me. “Well, you have quite the selection, don’t you?” she asked with a smile, her beautiful, deep violet eyes traveling across each of the labels. Those eyes were one of her most attractive aspects. Well, that, and her personality… and her smile… and her mane… oh, everything about her was attractive. I couldn’t help but blush at the thought. Luckily for me, she was too busy deciding to notice.

“Well, a variety of choices is always nice,” I said. “I think I’m going to have one of my favorites, lavender.” I pointed a hoof at the box. “It’s just so soothing.”

“Hmm, I might as well have that too,” Twilight said with a shrug. “My coat is lavender after all.” She chuckled softly.

I smiled. “That is tr-”

My sentence was interrupted by the shrill whistle of steam expelling from the kettle. I quickly trotted over, pulled it away from the stove, and turned off the flame. As I returned, Twilight had already set out two teacups. I was surprised she’d remembered where they were from her last visit. It was quite some time between the two. Using her magic, she placed a teabag in each, and I gently filled them with steaming water, making sure not to spill any.

I couldn’t help but smile as I set the kettle down, and turned to see my friend sniffing the air, her nostrils flaring ever so slightly as they sucked in the aromatic steam. “It smells amazing, doesn’t it?”

“Very,” Twilight said, looking up and smiling as she noticed my own.

“Would you like to go sit on the couch?”

***

I was both content and excited when Twilight sat down so close to me on the couch. We were close friends after all. I was sure it meant nothing; but it was still nice to feel the warmth of her body radiating against mine, even if we weren’t touching.

I’m not sure how long, but for quite some time we were silent. We were simply enjoying our tea. Its calming scent filling our nostrils; its steam clearing our lungs; its equally relaxing, and mild flavor traveling over our tongues; and then there was warming sensation which it left in our stomachs as we swallowed.

“It’s a beautiful day out so far,” Twilight said, breaking the silence, and causing me to realize how much of it there truly was.

“Oh, is it? I haven’t really been outside yet. I’ve just been so busy.”

It was once again silent for a moment as she took a sip of her tea, then swallowed. “Well, you really should at some point. Knowing you, I’m sure you will. You know, I always love walking to your cottage.”

“Oh, and why is that?” I tilted my head at her curiously.

“I know it’s just at the edge of Ponyville, and barely out in the wilderness, but there’s always so much nature. I guess it’s just nice to hear the sounds of birds chirping, critters rustling through the bush, the water rushing through the creek, and so on without the noise from town. It’s just so peaceful. No wonder you chose to live here.” She then gave an almost dreamy sigh.

I smiled at her appreciation. “Oh yes, you know me. I love nature.”

“And your home is wonderful too, always so nice and cozy. I just feel welcome here. You know, I wouldn’t mind living out here. Have you ever thought about a roommate?” she teased; or was it teasing? Could this be another hint? Did she truly want to live with me, of all ponies? I was sure she was just kidding around. “…Fluttershy?” I looked up and suddenly remembered she was awaiting my response.

I smiled, blushing lightly. “Oh, hehe, very funny, Twilight… I’m sorry, I just was thinking.”

“About?” she raised her eyebrow curiously.

“Oh, nothing important.”

Twilight gave me a simple shrug in response, and began to sip away at her tea once more. Once again, the two of us grew quiet, and it was all my fault. Why did I always have to make things so awkward? I wondered what she thought of me when I shut down like that. I assumed she thought it was pathetic, just like I did. I couldn’t help it though. It just happened. Even if I pushed myself, it was hard to recover from something like that. Thanks to her though, she made it easy. One of the many other reasons I liked her so much.

“So, how’s life, Fluttershy? Done anything interesting lately?”

I quickly swallowed the hot sip of tea I had taken, barely having time to even taste it. “Good. I haven’t been doing much though. Well, just the usual, that is.”

“Yeah, same here. Believe it or not, I’ve actually had time to read books that I actually want to read.”

I couldn’t help but smile wide; her eyes and face lighting up as she spoke. “That’s very good.”

Twilight chuckled happily in response. “Oh, you don’t even know! It’s nice when we don’t have to go defeat some evil villain, or stop some evil magic, isn’t it?” she asked with a smirk.

I giggled. “Oh, yes, very nice. So, anyways, how are the other girls doing? I haven’t seen any of them for a few days.”

Her eyes widened as she looked at me, almost as if in shock from what I’d said. “They’re all good… but nopony has stopped by to see you?”

I shook my head softly. “I’m sure they’ve been busy.”

“Well, I’m glad I’m here then. I don’t want you getting lonely,” she smiled softly, nudging my side with her hoof.

I giggled at the feeling. “Thanks, Twilight. You’re very sweet.”

“Actually, I think I have an idea for how we can spend a little more time together.”

“Oh?” I asked, looking up at her curiously as a sense of excitement overcame me. I would gladly spend as much time with her as possible.

“Would you be interested in a picnic? We won’t have to go far. We’ll just do it right outside in your yard. Like I said, it’s a lovely day, so why not enjoy it?”

I could feel my lips spreading wide, and then my teeth exposing in a grin. “That would be wonderful!” I gasped softly. My cheeks then began to heat up, realizing how silly I was acting.

“Cute,” Twilight teased, knowing it would make me blush even further; and of course, it did. I couldn’t control myself, and let out a small squeal, feeling even dumber afterwards. “Calm down there. I was only playing around,” she chuckled.

I nodded my head, and took another sip of my tea, the cup shaking in my hoof as I lifted it to my lips. “Sorry.”

“I’m not really sure what you’re apologizing for, but it’s okay. Now, once we finish up this tea, how about we go make some sandwiches?”

“Cucumber?” I asked, my mouth watering at the thought.

Twilight thought for a moment, then nodded her head. “Sounds good to me.”

And a Picnic

I always enjoyed watching Twilight do just about anything. I felt bad for making the cucumber sandwiches so slowly; but it was hard not to be distracted by her. Each movement of her magic was so precise, so calculated, so steady, and smooth, all at the same time. She could make even the simplest of chores beautiful.

It was nothing like watching Rarity make dresses though. That was an art. Although all of her movements were just as steady, they were ever changing with the flow of the dress. Twilight’s motions were much more of a science; a series of steps which were just as beautiful after each and every repetition as the previous.

Although a problem in some situations, her OCD came in handy in times like that. Bread, cheese slice, another cheese slice slightly overlapping the first, four thick slices of cucumber, bread; each item was laid down in perfect order with nothing left out of place.

“Fluttershy?”

Her voice broke me free from my daze. I hesitantly moved my eyes up to hers, seeing exactly what I feared. She was staring right at me, her lips curved upward in a smug smile, and her hoof tapping lightly against the floor. “Oh…I’m so sorry. I was just…well…um,” I muttered, stumbling over my words.

“In a daze? It’s fine, Fluttershy… but is everything alright? You’ve been acting strange all morning.”

I could feel my heart suddenly pounding heavily at my chest, my breath seeming to leave me. I sucked in a soft gasp of air, my body growing rigid. “…Yes…I’m fine,” I mumbled.

I watched as Twilight’s face grew stern and serious, her eyes narrowing ever so slightly. “Look, Fluttershy, I understand if you don’t want to tell me what’s going on. That’s fine; but whatever it is, I’d recommend you find a solution. It seems to be really taking a toll on you. I’m starting to get worried.”

“Oh… well, I really don’t want you to have to worry about me, Twilight. I’ll do my best to straighten up.” Inside I let out a long, drawn out, imaginary sigh of relief as my body and mind relaxed. I was more than thrilled that I wouldn’t have to explain myself to her. Just the thought of it made my heartbeat quicken again.

“Anyways, let’s find a nice place outside, hm?” she said with a warm smile. “I’m sure this picnic will help get your mind off things.”

“But… the sandwiches,” I sputtered out, my eyes darting to the plate we had set out for them. “Oh…” I mumbled, realizing it was already stocked full.

Twilight replied with a smirk, and used her magic to place the final piece of bread atop the one sandwich I had been working on the whole time. She then gently placed it in amongst the others, making sure the rows she had created were still perfectly straight and orderly.

“Want to carry the basket for us?” she asked sympathetically, seeing the almost shocked look which had formed on my face. Carrying the basket would have to make up for my slacking off.

“Of course I will,” I said sweetly, giving her a smile as she covered the plate with a glass lid; and placed it in the basket alongside a container of iced tea we had made beforehoof. This time it’s flavor was a gentle, but refreshing citrus. After she stuffed in the blanket, and put the lid in place; I grasped the basket tightly between my teeth, and headed for the door.

The sun had already grown very bright and intense outside, causing me to squint as I stepped out into it. The ground was still cool though, and the grass tickled against my hooves as I made my way across it.

“Underneath that tree, down by the creek?” Twilight suggested, pointing a hoof to the location.

I nodded my head, and gave her a tight grin, struggling to keep the woven handle in my mouth. Taking my expression as I had intended, she trotted off to the shade excitedly. I tried my best to keep up, but made sure to watch for any insects in the grass. It wasn’t fair of me to harm or even end their little lives just because I wanted to catch up to my friend. Luckily, there were only a few beetles and bees, ones which I could easily step around.

“Whew, it’s getting pretty warm out already,” Twilight said with a sigh, and quickly wiped a hoof across her brow.

I gently set the basket on the ground as I reached her. “Oh, yes, very,” I agreed. “We don’t have to eat outside if it’s too hot for you.”

“No, no, I’m sure it’ll be fine in the shade. Thank you though,” she assured me as she took the blanket from the basket. It unfurled easily with the help of her magic, and she laid it out as perfectly as she could on ground, adjusting it a few times to make sure.

I took a seat on its soft surface, a bit uneven from the larger tufts of grass beneath. Twilight took her seat directly across from me, and placed the plate of sandwiches between us. I could feel my mouth grow wet with salivation, and suddenly realized that I hadn’t even had time to eat breakfast.

One thought led to another, and suddenly, I gasped. “Oh, Twilight, I’m so sorry.”

“For?” she asked, raising her eyebrow.

“I never thanked you for washing all of those bowls for me; and for making these yummy looking sandwiches.”

A small smile formed on her lips. “Well, you’re certainly welcome. I don’t think you should be thanking me for the sandwiches yet though. I’m not even sure if they’re any good.”

To alleviate any doubt she had, a grabbed one of the near-perfect looking sandwiches between my hooves, then took a small bite. I had taken a bite large enough to get a little bit of everything; but quickly realized that Twilight had layered them so perfectly that each bite would contain every ingredient.

“Mmm, these are delicious,” I said with a hum after swallowing. The taste of the sweet, juicy cucumber, the strong, flavorful cheese, and the grainy goodness of the bread lingered pleasingly on my taste buds.

As if to make sure my compliments were true, Twilight took a bite of her own. After swallowing it down and grinning, she took another much larger bite. If you didn’t know her, the way Twilight ate seemed very out of her character. She was both messy, and noisy. Strange sounds escaped her mouth as it was covered with cucumber juice and breadcrumbs. I tried my best not to snicker, and quickly looked away as an amused smile grew on my face. It was so adorable.

She grinned after swallowing. “You’re right, these are good! I should be thanking you though.”

Pushing my mane away from my eye, I turned back to her, wondering what she meant. “Why is that?”

“Well, you’re the pony that bought all of the ingredients, after all. I don’t know how you do it, but you always seem have the freshest food.”

I felt my cheeks warming slightly at the compliment. Any compliment, even the most simple, made me blush. Especially if the pony giving it was Twilight. “Thank you. I always try my best to buy what looks the nicest. I tend to do it more for the animals than I do for myself though,” I said with a sheepish smile.

“No wonder those animals love you. You treat them like royalty,” she teased before taking another bite. I giggled softly. It was very true, but each and every one of those little critters deserved it; at least, I thought so. “I have a feeling there’s food on my face, hm?” she asked.

I nodded my head softly. “Yes.”

“I was only saying that because you have a little something there.” She pointed her hoof at the corner of my mouth. “Here, let me get you a…” her sentence came to a stop as she peered into the basket. “Oops, we may have forgotten the napkins,” she said with a lighthearted giggle.

“Oh…um, hmm…” My eyes darted back and forth looking for something, anything to wipe our mouths on as I mumbled.

“No problem, I can just use a simple spell.” I turned my eyes back up to her, watching as a pink aura surrounded her mouth, and easily flicked away the crumbs. I was glad she’d found a solution…but what about me? My question was quickly answered. “Turn your face a little to the left.”

“Hm?” I looked at her curiously.

“You want your mouth cleaned too, right?”

I nodded my head softly. “Yes, of course…but-” I felt a strange tingle around my mouth and cheeks, then realized that she was using the same spell on me. “Oh, thank you, Twilight,” I mumbled, feeling myself blush. “You’re so very sweet.”

“Pshh, it’s nothing,” she said with a smirk as she finished. “Anyways, want some of that tea? I’m thirsty.”

I nodded. “Of course.”

She placed a cup in my outstretched hooves, then filled it nearly to the brim. I smiled softly in thanks, and took a small sip. Twilight did the same. A sudden, “Shh,” escaped her mouth, even though I wasn’t speaking. I tilted my head questioningly.

She slowly closed her eyes in response, and tilted her muzzle up into the air. The small patches of sun which broke through the canopy of the tree above us, illuminated her face. I quickly realized what she was doing, listening to the sounds of nature.

The peaceful movement of the cool stream beside us created a pleasing background to the chirping of birds, buzzing of insects, and the soft whistle of the breeze in the nearby forest. The shade of the tree created the perfect cover from the intense sun above it. The grass and wildflowers glowed brightly in its rays. So too did Twilight’s absolutely stunning face. The shadows of the leaves helped to outline its smooth features.

I felt ashamed for staring, but I couldn’t help myself. With her eyes closed, I could do it all I wanted, and gladly took the opportunity. She was breathtakingly beautiful. The edges of her cheeks were so perfectly rounded, and her muzzle just as smooth with no harsh edges. Her dark, silky mane shimmered elegantly in the light, a stripe of pink and purple accenting it perfectly. Her long, black eyelashes contrasted starkly against her light, lavender fur.

My eyes began to travel down to her shapely body. I felt quite guilty for noticing, but the curves of her body had grown even more accentuated after she became an alicorn. Her chest was much more pronounced, and rounded. Her legs were slightly longer and more slender; and her stomach pushed in away from her ribcage with a soft, but noticeable curve.

Twilight’s eyes blinked open, and surprisingly enough, I gazed right into them. I wasn’t afraid, or nervous. Not even the slightest awkward sensation rose within my stomach. I felt calm… content. I’m sure it was only just a few seconds, but it felt like minutes; and Twilight gazed right back. Her eyes were like two perfect amethysts.

“Beautiful,” Twilight whispered, finally causing my heart to begin pounding. My eyes darted down to the blanket, and my cheeks burned with a blush. Because she was staring at me, I, of course, assumed that she was referring to me. My mouth opened in an attempt to say something, anything, a thank you, maybe. Luckily, nothing but a soft gasp came out. “Thanks for letting me enjoy such an amazing day with you, Fluttershy. Honestly, if it wasn’t for you, I’m sure I’d be locked up inside the library reading,” she said with a laugh.

“Oh…” I mumbled, my heart wrenching painfully as I finally realized she wasn’t referring to me. I gulped, and then clenched my teeth together, trying my best to hold back tears from the sudden insight. “Y-you’re welcome,” I managed to push out.

I felt something brushing against the outside of my thigh. To my relief as I looked over, Angel’s small face, and piercing black eyes pointed up at me. He crossed his paws, and huffed. “Oh, Angel, you and the critters need lunch too, don’t you? I’m sure you’re starving.” I would never, ever want to cut things short with Twilight; but after what just happened, I was on the verge of another breakdown. This time, one which was much worse. “I’m sorry to cut things short, Twilight; but I really do need to get these critters their food.”

“That’s fine, no worries. I should probably head back to see what trouble Spike’s gotten himself into anyways,” she said with a light chuckle.

“I’ve had a wonderful time with you,” I said sweetly as I got to my hooves. “You can make almost anything enjoyable.”

“Well, thanks,” she said with a grin as she too got to her hooves. “I had a lot of fun too.” Suddenly, her hooves were wrapped tightly around me in an embrace. Her warmth, and soft fur felt amazing against my own. I gently nuzzled my cheek against hers, and squeezed back tightly… I loved her.

“We should do this again soon,” I sighed out, trying my best not to make it sound too dreamy.

“Yeah, we really should,” she said with a soft smile as she pulled away. “Actually, are you going to that concert a couple days from now?”

“Oh, Vinyl…I mean, I guess I should be saying DJ PON-3 is playing in the town square, right?”

“Yeah… that’s normally not the sort of music I listen to, you know that; but it’s free, so why not? Besides, this filly has to party every now and again.” She gave me a smirk.

“Oh, I’m not really sure if I want to. You know me. Big crowds and dancing aren’t really my thing; and it’ll have both.”

“Come on, Fluttershy, live a little. It’ll be fun. You don’t have to dance if you don’t want to; and we can stay away from the crowd.

“I…I’m not sure, Twilight. I just… wait, did you say we?”

Twilight nodded her head and smiled. “Mhm, you did say you wanted to spend some more time together, right?”

“Yes, but-”

“Come on, Fluttershy, we’ll call it a date,” she pleaded.

Because she was pleading, I knew how badly she wanted me to come along. I had never, ever had her do that to me. Along with that, she said “date.” Did that truly mean what I thought it did? “Um…a…a d-date?” I muttered out shyly, quickly turning my eyes away from her as my cheeks began to heat up.

I looked up just in time to see her eyes roll as she laughed. “Fluttershy… you know what I meant. I tilted my head questioningly. “A date between friends.”

Even if it was just a friendly get together, I would never pass up the opportunity to spend more time with Twilight. It was going to be a little out of my comfort zone, but I’d do it for her. “…O-okay… I’ll go.

“You will?” she asked, a pep in her tone. I nodded my head in conformation. “Oh, Fluttershy! You’re great!” she squealed with delight, a large grin on her face. Suddenly, her soft lips made contact with my cheek, and I blushed furiously. My body grew light with joy, and my heart pounded lovingly. I was sure it was just a way for her to physically show both her excitement and gratitude; but it was still absolutely amazing.

My cheeks on fire, I looked down to see an infuriated Angel, his paw tapping against the ground. “Oh, Angel, I’m so sorry…” I turned my eyes back up to Twilight, my mind still in a bliss from what she’d done. “I really should be getting these critters their food. I’ll see you in a couple nights,” I said with a smile, my voice much louder and more excited than normal.

Alcohol Talks

A colorful, tightly packed crowd of ponies stood before us. Their many loud voices echoed through my head, causing a sense of fear and anxiety to grow from deep inside me, and slowly force its way out. I could feel my body tremble slightly, and tried my best to hold it back.

“Well, it looks like everypony had the same idea we did,” Twilight said with a sigh, but one which was lighthearted, and not angered. “I guess we should have planned on coming even earlier. It is a DJ PON-3 concert, after all. Everypony is going to want to be up front, you know?”

I nodded my head softly, her soothing, but straightforward voice helping to calm me down. “Oh, yes, almost everypony is a fan of her music… and her looks.”

Twilight smirked. “Yeah, she’s definitely one good looking DJ.”

I had never heard Twilight call another mare attractive before, even a stallion for that matter; not even Flash Sentry, and I knew how much she enjoyed his looks. She was most likely just at ease. She was going to have a fun night at the concert with no worries. I was sure that put her in a great, and very open mood.

“I wonder where the other girls are,” I said, my eyes traveling across the colorful sea of ponies. In such a large crowd, it’d be hard to even spot a mane as bright as Rainbow’s.

Twilight shrugged. “I really have no idea. They said they’d be here, but never really specified where. If you’d like, we could always push our way up front. Even if we don’t find them, at least we’ll have a nice place up close to the stage.”

I could feel a rush of anxiety suddenly explode through my body, locking it up. I was barely able to shake my head as I spoke. “Oh, no… I mean, I’m not so sure about that. What if we lose each other, or… or-”

Twilight responded with a teasing wink. “Say no more, Fluttershy. How about we just head to the bar? It’ll be a little quieter, and we’ll have easy access to the booze. I was planning on having a few drinks anyways. How about you?”

I wasn’t much of a drinker. The thought of getting drunk, and not remembering a single thing scared me. Along with that, no control over my body. I shuddered at the thought. On the plus side though, alcohol did help to calm me down, and maybe even made me a bit braver. “I guess I could have one.”

Twilight smiled, and we headed over to the small tent, plastic table, and simple bar stools that had been set up. “Glad to hear it. I’m sure we’ll have lots of fun, even from back here. We’ll actually be able to talk; and that’s what we wanted, right? I nice little night out for the two of us.”

I nodded my head, a flutter of excitement overcoming my nerves. “Yes, of course.”

“Maybe it’s a good thing we didn’t find the others, hm? Now it’ll just be us,” she said sweetly as she took a seat near the end of the bar. I took a seat beside her. Luckily, it wasn’t too busy back there yet; so there were only a few other ponies there with us. “So… what’s new with you? Anything?”

I shrugged slightly. “Oh, still just the usual. It’s nice to get out for once, I guess.”

“You guess?” she asked with a chuckle. “Come on, Fluttershy, It’ll be fun. You are with me, after all.”

I could feel my cheeks heat up slightly at the thought. I was with her, just her, and it was great. “You’re right, it’s really nice to be spending some more time with you.”

The sudden voice of the bartender startled me, making me jump slightly in my seat. “What can a get you two hot fillies?” he asked with a wink, a smug look on his face. My body froze in its place, and I blushed deeply. I wanted to leave, get away from him, but I couldn’t. I was stuck. “You’re the prettiest mares I’ve seen so far tonight… but there hasn’t been much action back here yet. Tell you what, first round’s on me.”

Twilight, my soon to be savior from such an awkward situation, rolled her eyes, and huffed at his attempts to woo her. “No, I think, I’ll pay.” I watched as she gave him a very fake wink, and threw some bits out on the counter. She then stretched her back, purposely unfurling her wings so he’d realize that he was talking to a princess.

A sudden look of shock poured over his face, and his mouth fell open. “Oh… Princess Twilight, is it?” he asked with a quick bow. “I do apologize. What would you and your friend like? I’ll get it right away.”

“That’s better,” she said with a smirk. “Just get us two of your most popular drink… oh, and a word of advice; you’re never going to pick up fillies like us with whatever it was that you just did. You may want to rethink it. Try something, oh, a little more mannerly, perhaps?”

“Yes, Princess,” he said with another bow. Even though Twilight was a bit angered by the stallion’s actions, she still gave him a generous sum of bits for a tip. I couldn’t help but smile.

The bartender speedily returned with two yellowish iced drinks. He smiled, but said nothing, quickly returning to his other customers. “Now, what the hay is this?” Twilight asked, more to herself than me as she examined the drink, lifting it with her magic. She took a quick sip, and smacked her lips after swallowing. “Hmm, vodka and some kind of energy drink… that can’t be healthy.” She gave me a shrug, then laughed. “Oh well.”

I smiled softly, and took a sip of my own. The combination of relaxing alcohol, and the rush of energy immediately made my head spin as I swallowed. I cringed, and shook my head, mumbling an, “Oh…my…”

“Strong stuff, huh?” she asked with a chuckle before taking a small gulp.

“Very,” I giggled, then tried my best to down another sip. We both turned away from the bar to the crowd and stage in the distance. Celestia’s day was beginning to end, leaving a purple hue in the already orange sky. Soon, Luna’s beautiful night would be upon us, and the party would begin.

The strangest of feelings was beginning to overcome me as I swallowed down more of my drink. I was feeling more and more relaxed, but at the same time, more and more anxious. It wasn’t my normal anxiety though. It was more, the want to move rather than sit, to do something. I kicked my hooves back and forth as they dangled from the stool, attempting to get rid of some of the excess energy.

The air around us began to grow cooler, but my body felt warmer than ever. I turned my eyes away from my hooves, and back up to the crowd, noticing a familiar face flying towards us, Rainbow Dash.

“Hey, Rainbow,” Twilight said with a smile as she came to a speedy stop before us, a slightly disgruntled look on her face.

“Uh… hey, Twilight, Fluttershy… we’ve been lookin’ all over for you two! We were supposed to meet up, remember?” she said in a matter-of-factly tone.

Twilight shrugged. “I’m sorry, but we just didn’t want to push our way through all of those ponies.”

“Both of you can fly, remember?” she grumbled. “Easy peasy, you know? Just sort of fly over everypony.”

Twilight placed a hoof on her chin as she pondered the thought. “Well… I guess we always could do that. What do you think, Fluttershy?” She turned her beautiful eyes to my own, as if expecting an answer.

I could feel my lips turning downward into a frown as my heart began to pound. I really didn’t want to go out into such a large crowd of ponies. It just made me so uncomfortable, even after having something to drink. I didn’t want to disappoint Twilight by saying no either though; but my expression said it all, and she knew my answer right away.

“I think I’ll just stick back here with Fluttershy,” she said, causing Rainbow to become even more angered.

“…I-I’ll be fine here by myself, Twilight. Go ahead and have fun,” I mumbled softly, still trying my best not to disappoint her.

“Yeah, what Fluttershy said. If she doesn’t wanna have fun, that’s cool; but don’t let her drag you down with her!”

I could feel a growing pain from within. I had really begun to hope that the night would be a special one just for the two of us; but I was sure Twilight didn’t want some awkward pony like me “dragging her down” as RD said. If she left, I’d probably just head back home… there was no reason for me to be there otherwise.

I let out a small gasp of surprise as I suddenly felt her soft hoof wrap around my shoulders. “Fluttershy, I said I wanted to spend more time with you, remember? I’m not just going to abandon you back here. We’re on a ‘date’ after all.”

Her words made me grin like an overly awkward idiot as my entire face turned red. “Bleh! This is no time for some cheesy, romantic date! It’s time to party!” Rainbow grumbled, scrapping her hoof angrily at the ground. “I thought you weren’t even into mares, Twi?” she asked teasingly, glaring at her.

Twilight rolled her eyes in response. “Ugh, Rainbow!”

“Yeah, I don’t care! Enjoy your weird little date, ya party poopers!” Even if Dash said she didn’t care, I could easily tell by her yelling, and reddening face that she did.

“I think we’ll have plenty of fun back here, Dash,” Twilight said with a confident smirk. “Maybe even more fun than your little party up front.”

Rainbow responded with a loud huff. “Yeah… whatever,” she mumbled as she took off, leaving Twilight and I alone once more.

"Oh, that Rainbow Dash, she’s one stubborn pony,” Twilight said with a chuckle.

“Yes, very.” I nodded my head in agreement. “You can be pretty stubborn too,” I teased.

“Heh, I do get things my way when I want to,” she said with a wink, gently patting me on my back. I could feel myself blushing once more, realizing her hoof was still wrapped around me. I began to wonder if it really had turned into a date, rather than a ‘date.’ Was she really into mares… and me for that matter? I could feel my heart pounding lovingly at the idea, and my stomach filling with butterflies. I wished I could just ask to make everything easier, but I was much too nervous to. Instead, I gently rested my head against her shoulder. She didn’t seem to mind.

“So when is this thing going to start, anyways?” she asked, gazing into the upper sky which was now a much deeper purple. Twinkling stars were beginning to reveal themselves, and the large moon glowed in the distance.

As if wanting to answer her immediately, the sound of a microphone turning on echoed through the speakers, and then came Vinyl Scratch’s voice. “Sup, everypony? Are you ready to party? I know I am! Think I should start blasting out some serious beats?”

A synchronized roar burst from the crowd before us as they jumped up and down excitedly. Then came the sound of thousands of glowsticks all snapping at once as ponies wrapped them around their necks and hooves. I watched as one group of ponies began to quickly inflate large beach balls with air to be bounced back and forth through the crowd.

Vinyl’s voice returned. I could barely see what she was doing up on the stage. From where we were, she was almost just a white blur, glowing from the black lights on stage. “Aww, yeah! I’d say that’s a yes! Tell you what, Ponyville, I’m gonna shake this town like it’s never been shaken before! You better hold on tight, and hope your homes’ve got shatter resistant windows, ‘cause here comes the bass!”

After another collective cheer, the deep, shaking boom of bass filled the air as Vinyl’s music played. I could feel it in my ears, my head, my body, and perhaps even my soul. It was very strange, but felt nice in a way too. The crowd moved up and down with the beat. Colorful, flashing lights, along with the neon of glowsticks lit up the ever darkening night. I was in awe just watching.

“Whoa! There it is!” Twilight yelled over the music with a grin, the sensation of the beat, I assumed, feeling just as strange inside her as it did in me. “Can I get another drink?” she asked, turning to the bartender; his head bobbing to the music. She then turned back to me, and gave a wink. “How about you, Fluttershy? Need another round?”

I shook my head. “Oh, no… I think I’ll just take a water!” I tried my best to raise my voice over the music. Luckily, she was close enough that it was easy for her ears to pick it up.

“And one water!” she yelled to him. He gave a nod, hoofing over both of our drinks.

I watched as Twilight sipped at her drink, its level lowering much more quickly than it had with the first. She wasn’t much for drinking either, unless it was an occasion like this. I could tell she was already getting a little buzzed. Her eyes moved more slowly, and her movements were becoming much less precise than usual. The more alcohol she consumed, the closer she got to me. I felt guilty for enjoying it so much, especially considering the fact that it was just the alcohol acting, and not her… but having Twilight practically snuggled up to me was amazing. The night was suddenly even better than it had been before.

“I guess I can see why so many ponies enjoy this music!” Twilight yelled. Even though she was buzzed, she was still as thoughtful about everything as ever. “It has a feel to it, a very special feel, you know? It’s hard to put a hoof on, but the flow of the music almost seems to transport you to a completely different world! A world were there’s no worries, where only having fun, dancing, and drinking exist! It’s great! Right, Fluttershy?”

“Well… it’s certainly interesting!” I wasn’t really sure what to think about it. It was nice and all… but almost too much. Twilight was like my buffer zone though, keeping me calm and collected.

“Oh, I’ll certainly make things interesting, all right. You’ll see!” She gave me a wink, and pulled me even closer to her, nearly causing my stool to slip out from under me. With her hoof wrapped tightly around me, stroking against my side while my head rested against her, I was, at first, shocked. Then I began to relax, my cheeks growing heated as I nuzzled against her warm fur. What exactly did she mean by, “make things interesting,” I wondered. Was she going to do more than just hold me close? My heart began to pound once more.

“Why so nervous, Fluttershy?” she asked with a teasing wink, placing her hoof against my chest. My heart pounded faster, and faster; and I could feel my face growing redder and redder. She chuckled softly into my ear, then said, “You’re so adorable when you’re nervous.”

I let out a small yelp. Was she just teasing me… or was I finally getting what I wanted? She suddenly pulled away, helping to set me back up in my seat. “Get me another drink, please!” she yelled to the bartender. I began to wonder how long it would be until she was truly drunk. I was sure it wouldn’t be long at all.

“So… Fluttershy, I was thinking, maybe, just maybe we could go dance for a little? I know you don’t like crowds, but I’m sure it’ll be fun. Just try to zone out everypony else or something!”

My heart began to pound, this time with fear rather than love. “Oh… I’m not really sure about that.” Dancing… in a huge crowd with everypony watching me… it was like a nightmare.

“Oh, please, Fluttershy? Won’t you do it for me?” she pleaded before taking a gulp of her new drink. “This stuff is making me itch to get up and do something!”

“Can’t you just go dance by yourself?” I asked. I knew the moment I said it that it was a selfish reply, but I really didn’t want to go out into the crowd with her.

She frowned, and gave me a stare with wide, puppy-dog eyes. She was so cute. I was sure I had never seen her plead so much before. “I thought you’d jump at the opportunity to dance with me though.”

My face grew red. Did she know? Had she just been pretending to not notice my affection for her all this time? Was I really that bad at hiding it? “I guess it wouldn’t be…but there’s so many ponies out there…but, um, okay.”

“Okay, as in, you’ll dance with me?” she asked eagerly, a grin forming on her face. I nodded my head. “Good choice!” she yelled, giving me a wink as she hopped away from the bar, then pulled me up onto my hooves. Her drink, surrounded by an aura of magic, was in close tow beside her as she pushed her way through the thick, sweaty, and extremely energetic crowd of ponies. Along with that, so was I; her hoof wrapped tightly around my own, pulling me along as I stumbled over my hooves.

So many different faces, some of ponies I knew, others, complete strangers. I didn’t understand exactly why Twilight wanted to drag us so deep into the sweaty, bouncing sea, but she was. I was growing more and more panicked by the second. There were so many ponies, too many. They didn’t seem to mind us though, or even notice us for that matter. They were lost in the music, and the party itself. I guess that made it somewhat more comforting, to be ignored.

Finally, Twilight came to a stop in an open space wide enough for the two of us, along with a little wiggle room. A large grin appeared on her face as she began to stomp her hooves to the beat. Quickly, her moves grew faster, stronger, and wilder, until she was lost, just like everypony around us.

The beat of the music was catchy, and easy to move to, but I had a much harder time getting into the groove of things. I awkwardly shuffled my hooves from side to side, gently shaking my head. Unlike the others, I couldn’t lose myself in the low rumble of the bass. Every single time I got close, a sudden thought or worry filled my mind. I became suspicious of others watching, even though it was easy to see they weren’t. I began to realize that my awkward movements probably looked even more idiotic than Twilight’s rather haphazard style of dancing.

Perhaps she was getting a little too lost. Her body hung low to the ground as her hooves thrust away from her body randomly, and then returned to her side. Her wings flapped excitedly, most likely unknowingly as well. Her face was scrunched together tightly as if concentrating too hard. Nopony seemed to care though.

I guess that was another reason why so many ponies enjoyed concerts like those. You could be yourself, dance however you liked, and nopony even gave it a second thought. They were too busy enjoying themselves, and wanted to let you experience it as well. It was amazing, really.

As I thought about this, I grew more comfortable; and slowly, my shuffling turned into real movement. An uncontrollable smile formed on my lips as I let the music flow through me. I was no longer in control, instead the music was.

I could just vaguely hear Twilight’s familiar voice as she spoke. I had to read her lips to discover exactly what she was saying to me. “That’s the spirit, Fluttershy! You go girl!”

I gave her a grin, my dancing growing even faster, and harder as she followed suit. She paused for just a short moment to take another large gulp of her drink, and then got right back into it. In the flashing strobes and the glow of neon, I could tell her eyes were growing more and more glazed over with inebriation. When Twilight wanted to party, she really partied. I didn’t want her to get too drunk though… even if it did give me a good chance of getting closer to her. It just wasn’t right to use her like that.

Suddenly, I noticed Twlight’s relaxed eyes grow a bit wide as she stared upward. I looked up as well to see exactly what was going on, and noticed a large inflated ball plummeting downwards. I let out an unnoticeable yelp, and squinted my eyes shut tightly. I flinched as the ball’s surface pushed into my face, and then blinked as it bounced away, traveling somewhere else into the crowd.

I gasped once more as a hoof tapped against my shoulder from behind. I turned to see a grinning mare, one who was certainly not a local. She lifted her muzzle to my ear, and spoke, her warm breath pushing outwards. “Here, take these! Looks like you need some!” She pulled away, her grin as wide as ever, and hoofed over some glowstick necklaces. I nodded my head and smiled in thanks before she disappeared into the crowd. I pushed one over my head, and let it settle around my neck, then gave the other to Twilight. She gave me a rather slow wink in return, a seductive smile on her face. I looked away shyly, a deep blush on my cheeks. I tried to tell myself that it was just the alcohol talking, but I couldn’t help imagining it wasn’t. What if she did like me after all?

A pang of shock rushed through my body as her hoof wrapped around my chin, and pulled upwards. She gazed at me with unsteady eyes, and then pressed her lips against my cheek. They were warm, and wet, her saliva dampening my fur. My face grew red, and my body froze. It’s just because she’s been drinking, Fluttershy. Just because of the alcohol…that’s all. I thought to myself for assurance.

Twilight then gave me another wink before whipping around so that her backside faced me. Staring back at me, she raised her flank as close to my face as she could, and shook it to the beat. I could feel my lips contorting awkwardly as my body began to shake with nerves. Along with that, I could feel cold beads of sweat forming on my forehead.

It felt so wrong to not turn away, or simply ignore her… but at the same time, I couldn’t help but stare. I had never really had the chance to take a look at her backside before. I was much too nervous to take any glances. Now though, she was presenting it to me, and I could look all I wanted to.

It was so beautiful and perfect, just like the rest of her. It was smooth, and rounded. Just the sight of its curvature was enough to turn me on. It was plump and firm, but loose enough that it jiggled ever so slightly with each of her movements. I awkwardly shuffled my legs, and bit down hard upon my lip as I could feel myself growing a little wet… I wanted more.

She kept her tail rigid enough that it covered what was beneath as it swayed from side to side, not letting me have even the slightest glimpse. I had a feeling she was doing it on purpose, just to tease me, and make me want her more. She gave me one more wink before turning back around to face me.

Twilight then moved to my side, placing a large wing over top of me. She did this both as a way to keep her balance because she was growing tipsy, and as a way to press her body against my own. She gulped down the rest of her drink, and her magic sputtered on and off as it faltered, letting the drink cup fall the ground beneath. Luckily, it was plastic.

Before I had the chance to pick it up and find the nearest trashcan, I was suddenly pulled away, back through the crowd on the same path from which we’d arrived. My body was still a bit stiff with nerves, giving Twilight a bit of a struggle as she drug me along. I was unsure exactly what was happening. Were we just heading back to the bar for another drink? Her eyes kept gravitating towards me, barely even concentrating on where we were headed.

I looked away shyly, and tried my best to help navigate us through the ponies. The engulfing roar of the music slowly dissipated as we grew more and more distant from it. My ears still rang though, as if the music wanted to stick with me, to keep me dancing. It seemed almost eerily quiet as we finally reached the bar, even though the music was still pumping through my ears.

“D-did you, um, want another drink or something?” I stuttered out nervously as Twilight pulled me even closer against her. It was exactly what I had been wanting for so long, yet, it felt wrong. I wanted the real Twilight to hold me close, to love me, and care for me… not the drunk Twilight.

“Oh, I want something, alright,” she said with a smirk, leading us right out of the concert gates and into the seemingly desolate town beyond.

“And what’s that?” I muttered shyly, looking away. “…Oh, and by the way, I had fun dancing with you out there.”

She chuckled before giving me a quick nuzzle on the neck. “So did I… hot stuff.”

“O-oh…my,” I mumbled, blushing deeply.

She brought her mouth to my ear and whispered softly. “I was thinking maybe we could have a little more fun.” She then pulled away with another wink.

“U-um…what kind of fun?” I had a feeling I knew exactly what she wanted…

“Well, I’ve been reading a book recently… about mares our age. It said that a lot of us tend to… experiment with our sexuality.” Her pauses were long, and drawn out, as if struggling to figure out exactly what she wanted to say. “You’re cute…”

Even though I knew it was coming, my mouth still flopped open with shock after hearing it firsthoof. My body froze and trembled once more. My thoughts grew into a jumbled panic. I began to wish that anypony, Rainbow, Pinkie, Rarity, Applejack, even just a random stranger would come to my rescue, and save me from such an awkward situation.

I wanted Twilight, I wanted her so badly. I had for so, so long. This was different though. She had been drinking, it wasn’t the real Twilight, the pony that I loved so much. She was somepony else… or was she? Sometimes ponies say that alcohol helps them speak their minds. So was that what Twilight, the real Twilight really wanted? Was it wrong of me to use her, and say yes; or was it an opportunity for both of us to show our true feelings for one another? An opportunity which I shouldn’t let slip from my hooves.

“…I know you want me, Fluttershy,” she teased, a seductive tone in her voice.

My heart began to pound at the statement. “Y-you…do?”

“Well, duh… have you ever realized how you look at me; the way you gaze into my eyes… the way you blush or smile at whatever I say? Don’t worry, I want you too… and, no, it’s totally not due to the fact that the book I told you about made me curious or anything. I really, really like you Fluttershy,” she mumbled, shaking her head loosely to and fro.

Was she telling me the honest truth, or lying to my face just because she wanted to “experiment” with me? Or maybe it was a little of both? My body, my emotions wanted me to say yes, but my mind was telling me no.

“I, um, you’re very right, Twilight. I like you a lot…but…but-”

I was no longer able to talk as her soft, damp lips wrapped around my own. My body was suddenly overwhelmed by a flurry of tingling, and the hardest fluttering I had ever felt in my stomach before. I thought she was going to pull away, but she continued to kiss. My eyes slowly fell shut as I was lost in a world of bliss. Her hoof wrapped around my head, pushing our lips even further together.

I had never kissed another mare before, or even a stallion for that matter. It was my first kiss, and it was with the mare of my dreams. I pushed an uncontrollable gasp of joy out of my mouth, and into hers. A small moan reverberated from her mouth in response.

Twilight pulled away with a grin, a light blush tinging her cheeks. “So what do you say, cutie?”

“I-I… yes!” I struggled to push out. Yes, oh why did I say yes?

“That’s my girl. Good choice,” she cooed, once again wrapping her wing around me. “Why don’t we head to my place, hm?”

Paradise is a Lie

The walk back to the library was one of the longest I’d ever taken. I had never been so conflicted about anything in my life. Either out of respect for my emotions; or just due to the fact that she had been drinking so much, Twilight was completely silent except for the un-rhythmic beat of her hooves against the hard earth beneath.

It most likely would have been one of the quietest, and most awkward walks I’d ever taken as well; but my thoughts made it seem much louder. My heart pounded heavily at the thought of Twilight having her way with me, and my marehood tingled excitedly. My mind filled with multiple scenarios and thoughts on what exactly we’d do to one another. Then those thoughts would be cast away, and my dreamy smile would turn into a painful cringe. I, of course, had never done anything like that with anypony; but I was sure I wasn’t the one night stand type.

Deep within my thoughts, I knew that was exactly what she wanted. She had said experiment after all. I knew what that meant. She was curious about sex, especially with another mare, and wanted to give it a try. That was it…. although, I was very unsure why she decided to choose a mare like me. I was sure a fun mare like Rainbow Dash or Pinkie Pie would have said yes if she’d asked them. So why me? I tried my hardest to push back the hopeful thoughts that she really did love me; and assured myself that I was just going to be hurt even more if I thought like that.

The easiest plan I had come up with was to tell her that I had to go, and simply leave. She’d go home. I’d go home; and there wouldn’t be any complications. Better yet, the next morning, there was a chance she wouldn’t even remember asking me in the first place. All would be back to normal. I couldn’t do it though. My body was urging me to stay. Her strong, warm wing, felt more and more comforting around me. I’d always wanted to have sex, and not be stuck using my hoof or the vibrator I had hidden in my home. Along with that, I’d be doing it with the mare of my dreams.

Whether it was the right one or not, my choice suddenly grew much clearer. I was ready to let Twilight do whatever she wanted to me, or even do whatever she wanted me to do to her. Sudden worries of what our friends would think filled my mind… especially if we were just “experimenting” with one another for fun, and out of curiosity. Would their opinions of me change, of Twilight? I would never want to give Twilight a bad reputation, never. If we just kept it a secret…

The thoughts escaped my mind as I looked up, realizing we’d come to a stop. We were already there. “Well, here we are… are you sure you want to do this?” Twilight asked, her eyes slowly turning towards me.

The simple fact that she was still giving me a choice took me by surprise. I was expecting to be hustled up to her room and thrown flat on my back. I guess she was still the same Twilight after all, even if she was drunk… well, at least mostly the same. It didn’t change my answer though. “…Yes,” I mumbled, giving her a nod as I gulped nervously.

Her cheeks turned a light pink at my answer, causing mine to do the same. “Mmm, I think I love you…” she mumbled softly as she nuzzled my neck. I then let out a small gasp as she kissed it.

I knew for a fact that what she’d said was just out of excitement, and being caught up in the moment. It was still nice to hear though. I let out a moan as she sucked some of my fur and skin into her mouth, giving it a soft nibble. A sudden sound of hoofsteps, or at least, what I assumed to be hoofsteps off in the distance startled me. What if somepony saw us? “Um…Twi-Twlight? Maybe we should head inside?”

She giggled in response, giving my neck another kiss before pulling away. “Want me that bad already, hm? I knew you would.” She then gave me a wink as she opened the door with her magic.

The library was dark and lifeless as we stepped inside, only the soft bluish glow of the moon helping to light up its familiar interior. I was sure that little Spike was snug, and fast asleep in the warmth of his bed… Spike! My heart began to pound. We couldn’t have sex while he was in the same room as us. That’d just be awful. He could wake at any second, and see us…not that he’d mind a little show, but I was no showpony.

“Twilight… what about Spike?” I gasped out in fear, but tried my best to keep it as quiet of a gasp as possible.

Her horn glowed with pink as she flicked on the lights, allowing me to see her rolling, and very glazed over eyes. “He’s still at the concert, silly. Don’t you know he’s a major DJ PON-3 fan?”

I sighed with relief. “Well, no… I guess I never asked.”

“Lucky for us… now how about I get your sexy little flank upstairs?” I froze, my face growing as red as a cherry when her hoof smacked down against my flank. A rush of pain, the good kind of pain, traveled through my backside.

“Twilight!” I groaned out lovingly as she gave me one more spank. My eyes widened, and I quickly covered my mouth as I realized what I’d just done.

Twilight smirked proudly, and chuckled. “I always knew you’d have a kinky side, Fluttershy… Now come on, cutie…I want you in bed.”

“Oh, yes, of course,” I cooed sweetly, having a hard time believing the words that were coming out of my mouth.

I let out a gasp of pleasure as she gave my flank a squeeze before heading to the stairs. I had never had anypony touch my like that before; and it felt amazing. I couldn’t wait to get even more. Even though my heart was pounding, and my nerves trying their best to freeze me up or make me fumble, I wasn’t stopping. Things were about to happen to me that I thought I could only ever dream about. This was my chance; and for once, I wasn’t giving up. The thought still persisted deep in my mind, that maybe I should though.

I followed close behind her as if in a trance from being touched. Her silky tail which was restrained from swinging earlier, now swung freely back and forth. I had a feeling it wasn’t just swinging though. She was moving it on purpose. With every sway I was given a glimpse of her delicious marehood. Its lips looked soft, smooth, and plump. Streaks of her juices glimmered in the light. She was just as wet as I was, making me realize the sudden awkward dampness between my legs… more than damp, dripping.

I bit down upon my lower lip as I continued to stare, occasionally tripping myself up on the stairs. Her heart shaped clitoris was already swollen with excitement, spreading her lips just enough to let me see its pink surface. Below, I could just barely see the rounded edges, and hard nipples of her teats. They were the perfect size. I shouldn’t have been surprised though; everything on her was perfect. I was in my own personal heaven. So much so, that all the consequences of my previous worries seemed to disappear. All that mattered now was Twilight.

My heart began to pound again as we reached her bedroom, and new fears entered my mind. What if I got so nervous that I didn’t enjoy myself? What if Twilight wanted me to please her, and I couldn’t get her off? What if I suddenly decided I didn’t want to continue? Could I actually get myself out of it; or let her have her way with me because it was too awkward to say anything? No… I wanted her, I wanted her so bad. I knew I would get a little nervous, but we could do whatever she wanted, however kinky it might get because I’d do anything to be with her.

“How about you lay down on your back, and let me examine that pussy of yours?” Twilight asked with a smirk. “You already got a great view of mine,” she cooed, giving me a wink. “So I think I deserve to see… and play with…I mean examine a little something in return.”

Just by her strange sentences, I could tell she was still very drunk; but I didn’t mind at all. If she hadn’t been drinking, I was sure something like that would have never happened. Like me, she would probably overthink the consequences and end up shying away; but instead of using alcohol to wash away those thoughts, I overcame them through pure desire. Something which I was sure Twilight was much less passionate about when it came to the two of us. As she said, she was just curious.

Blushing deeply as my mind filled with many scenarios of how our night would pan out, I crawled onto the bed, and rolled over on my back. I suddenly froze in a panic. Besides my mother and father, nopony else had ever seen my private parts… well, there was Rainbow Dash when we were still foals, but I put that under the same category as my mom and dad. There was nothing sexual about it. This was completely different. What would Twilight think of it? Would she like what she saw? I’m sure my marehood was nothing compared to her beauty of one.

“Come on, hot stuff. What are you waiting for?” Twilight questioned in a seductive manner as she closed in on the bed. She was drunk, I’m sure she wouldn’t exactly care about what was down there. Besides, if she had never done something like this before, she really had nothing to compare it with. After convincing myself that everything would be fine, I decided to spread my legs. Before I could though, I was beat to it.

Twilight’s hooves wrapped around my legs, and quickly pried them apart. I gasped with both shock and excitement; the sudden sensation also causing me to grow even wetter. I watched intently as her eyes moved slowly back and forth as if scanning my crotch. I became eager as she began to lick and bite down upon her lips. She was enjoying what she was seeing.

My teats were slightly larger than hers, although I had no idea what she preferred. That could be a good or bad thing to some. My marehood, well, I didn’t really look at it that often. It’s kind of hard to when it’s on the opposite end of your body from your head. On the occasions that I did look at it in a mirror, it seemed nice enough. It certainly felt nice too when I touched it with my hoof. And just like staring at yourself in the mirror, it was hard to say whether or not if it really looked sexy or hot down there. I just had no clue. Twilight was enjoying it though.

“Sooo, do you mind if I touch?” Twilight asked eagerly, her hoof slowly traveling down my leg, and over my thigh.

I had never realized what a polite drunk she was. I’m sure anypony else would have just went for it, even if they hadn’t been drinking for that matter.

“Of course,” I mumbled shyly and gave a soft nod; my face growing red as her hoof moved closer and closer to my crotch.

I gasped in a combination of excitement, joy, and pleasure as the smooth tip of Twilight’s hoof made contact with my lips. Twilight smirked playfully in response, and slowly traced their surface, growing teasingly close to my clit as she reached it.

“Oh, Twilight! I couldn’t help but moan out. She was barely even touching me, and it was the most pleasurable feeling I had ever experienced. I could feel myself growing wetter and wetter; and my insides swelling in response to the wonderful sensation.

Twilight pulled away her hoof with a seductive smile. My juices were already dripping from its surface. She gave it a slow lick, and grinned. “Mmm, you taste great, Fluttershy. Give me more,” she cooed.

I moaned more loudly as her hoof went back down, this time, straight for my clitoris. She teased the tip of her hoof around its edges, causing my entire body to heat up with the pleasure as I groaned uncontrollably. My legs twitched with her movements, and my wings suddenly thrust out from my sides.

As they began to flap with bliss filled spasms, I felt as if I was literally climbing higher and higher into the air. My body and mind felt lighter with each and every pleasurable rush which raced throughout me. Beads of sweat began to form at the tips of my fur as my body heated up further. It was the most amazing feeling I had ever experienced; and to make it even better, Twilight was the one doing it for me.

My vision grew blurry as I let my mind focus completely on the sensation; and my eyes slowly fell shut. My hips began to raise up uncontrollably as I moaned and panted more quickly. Suddenly, I felt Twilight’s hooves wrap around my lower thighs and flank. Before I was able to open my eyes to figure out exactly what she was doing, a sudden rush of warmth and wetness covered my marehood.

I gasped lovingly and gripped my hooves against the bed sheets as her tongue moved up and down my slit. She was a pro, or at least I thought she was. It could have been because nopony had ever done anything like that to me before. I could feel more and more of my juices flowing out from between my lips and mixing with her warm saliva. Her tongue was strong, but gentle, pushing in just far enough to tease at my insides.

Soft moans escaped her mouth as she continued to lick, her warm breaths causing even more pleasure. "Twi-Twilight!” I couldn’t help but moan out again, my tail and wings twitching uncontrollably. In response, her muzzle pushed down hard against my marehood, causing her tongue to thrust deep inside. As she explored my dripping insides, she kissed lovingly at my entrance.

Even though my eyes were already closed, I could feel them rolling even further into the back of my head as she continued, massaging her hooves at my flanks. Suddenly, I began to grow tense as spasms of pleasure rushed through every muscle in my body. My flank rose even higher into the air, my wings flapped faster, and I groaned and grunted with even the smallest of her movements.

Her amazing tongue made its way down to my clitoris, and her soft lips wrapped around my marehood as best they could. As her tongue traveled back and forth across my clit, she sucked strongly at my insides. The sudden pulling towards her mouth somehow gave me even more pleasure than I was already receiving.

I was in my own little paradise as the sensation within me grew stronger and stronger. As a way to reward her, and just to feel more of her, I placed an unsteady hoof upon her head. I shakily moved it across her silky mane, and then played with her ear. She twitched it in appreciation as I gently stroked my hoof along its surface.

I was unable to control my hoof for long though. It suddenly clamped down against her head, pushing her even deeper inside me, and causing her to moan. My body shook violently as it tensed up again, and a wave a pure, blissful pleasure rushed over me. With an instinctual thrust of my hips and a loud gasp, I began to sigh and moan lovingly as I came

My eyes were clenched shut tightly, but I somehow managed to pry them open; and watched as my juices covered Twilight’s muzzle and lips. My head fell back onto the bed as I finished, and I panted heavily. “That was… a-amazing,” I sighed out, watching my stomach heave up and down with heavy breaths.

She pulled away with my cum dripping from her lips and chin, her tongue still hanging out of her mouth. She gave me a wink, and used her magic to clean the juices from her face; and then hung the collected liquid above her head and let it drip down into her throat.

“You think?” she asked after swallowing. I nodded my head softly and smiled wide. “Well, I hope I wasn’t so good that you don’t want to do anything else,” she cooed teasingly, once again rubbing her hoof across my lips, and causing soft gasps to escape my mouth. “That’s what I thought.”

Just as the sweat clinging to my fur began to cool, my heart started to pound heavily. She was now climbing on top of me, her teeth bit down upon her lip, and a sudden vibrancy in her glazed eyes. We moaned in unison as her marehood pushed down against my own.

My eyes widened in surprise; and my cheeks lit up as her lips wrapped around mine. I could feel the tip of her strong tongue pushing at my lips, and slowly opened them to let her inside. Her salivating tongue swirled around my own, barely giving me a chance to play back. I moaned as I attempted to do the same to hers, our drool mixing and covering each other’s lips. I could taste the faintest sweetness of my own juices in her mouth.

We both pushed a gasp into each other’s mouth as Twilight began to grind her hips, gliding our marehoods across one another, their path slick and lubricated from both of our juices. Her perfect pussy was soft and smooth against my own, its lips just the right plumpness. As Twilight’s tongue pushed deeper and deeper inside my mouth, her grinding grew heavier and heavier.

I could not only feel her smooth vulva sliding across my own, but her swollen and dripping clitoris brushing and teasing at mine. We gasped and moaned into one another’s mouths, and I watched as Twilight’s wings jutted out, growing stiff like mine. Although blurry because her face was so close to my own, I could see her cheeks growing red, and noticed that her eyes were squinted shut with pleasure.

Causing me to blush even deeper, I wrapped my hooves around her slim waist, and pulled her down against me. I watched as her eyes widened with surprise. I’m sure she wasn’t expecting somepony like me to be so assertive; but I wanted her, all of her. After the moment of shock had passed, her eyes slowly fell shut again; and I let mine do the same.

I realized that her teats were now pushing up against my own. Her nipples were hard with excitement, and pressed into my skin. Twilight’s hoof suddenly moved down and latched around my breast. It was as if she had been so infatuated with my marehood earlier that she had completely forgot they were there; and was just now realizing it. I moaned into her mouth as she squeezed at it harshly, causing both a wave of pain and pleasure to rush through my crotch. Her grinding grew harder and deeper with each of her movements; and our marehoods grew wetter and wetter. I thrust my hips with her motions causing a sloppy noise to fill the room as our vulvas glided over and rubbed against one another.

Feeling even braver, I moved my hooves down to her flank and squeezed gently. Twilight gasped her appreciation into my mouth, and I sucked in her sweet breath as I squeezed more harshly. I never wanted to take my hooves off such a beautiful backside. I moved them slowly up and down, tracing her curves; and then pulled her marehood even closer against mine.

With another sharp, but enjoyable pain rushing through my body as she squeezed my teat once more, I realized that it had grown wet. A small amount of lactation had dribbled out in all the excitement.

Suddenly, I broke away from our kiss as my head fell back onto the mattress. My body was getting stiff again, and my mind was growing fuzzy. Twilight’s hooves moved up to my waist and squeezed tightly. I could feel her body tensing against my own, and knew she was about to burst just like me.

With my eyes squinted shut, I felt as she rested her cheek against mine. The two of us panted more and more quickly, our heavy breaths expelling onto each other’s shoulders. The pants turned into loud moans as both our hips tensed, pushing our marehoods harshly together.

Twilight let out a loving gasp, and a sudden rush of warmth poured over my crotch. The sensation of her steamy juices seeping into my marehood was enough to send me over the edge. I groaned and moaned loudly as my juices once again splattered out. Sweat dripped down my forehead as I looked forward and watched a small, but growing puddle of both of our juices forming on my crotch and stomach.

“I love you, Fluttershy,” Twilight sighed out as she finished, and nuzzled her cheek against my own.

“I so deeply in love with you, Twilight!” I cooed happily, pulling her body close to mine again and giving her a kiss on the cheek. I then blushed deeply, realizing what I’d just told her. I slowly turned my head so that I could see her reaction. To my surprise, her eyes were shut peacefully in what looked to be sleep.

“Cutie,” she said with a giggle as if to assure me she was still awake, and then pushed her hoof against my nose. “Let me clean us up.” A box of tissues levitated in front of Twilight’s head, and I watched as sheet after sheet was pulled out. She rolled off of me; and I felt a tingle as a cloud of magically enhanced tissues was gently rubbed back and forth across my marehood, soaking up our juices. After finishing up with me, Twilight repeated the process with herself.

“So… want to cuddle me for the rest of the night?” Twilight asked with a wink.

“Oh, of course I do, Twilight,” I whispered into her ear as I snuggled up into her warmth. “I love you so much.” She had told me that she loved me, but was it true? Was I just embarrassing myself by saying it again? What if she just got caught up in the moment? My worries wouldn’t be answered that night.

Twilight pulled me even closer to her before soft snores began escaping her mouth. She was fast asleep; a sleep that looked very peaceful by the calm expression and slight smile on her face. I gently, and making sure not to wake her, pressed my lips against hers one final time.

My heart began to pound painfully; and I realized that warm tears were trickling from my eyes. If all of what we did was just to experiment; if all of what we did was just because of Twilight drinking; then that night would be the one and only time I could ever get so close to her. I loved her so much; but I still wasn’t sure that she loved me.

I nuzzled my snout into her chest, whimpering softly. I wanted to spend as much time as I could with her; but at the same time, I knew things would be very awkward by morning. The only option was to leave.

Into the Unknown

I couldn’t sulk in my home all day. I had to get out, and at least do something; but I was in no state to be doing so anytime soon, or even in a state to see anypony else. Twilight wasn’t coming back. I just knew it. So what would I do? I picked the solution that always came to mind first. I’d go take a walk in the forest, not the Everfree, of course.

I always enjoyed walks. They were calming, relaxing, and got my mind off of anything. It was as if I was alone, but never truly alone. There were always plenty of animals around; and it was nice to hear them singing, and chatting.

“Goodbye, little ones,” I said with a soft smile as I opened the door, causing each and every animal to look up at me. “I’m going for a walk. I’ll be back soon… oh no, I want to go alone. Thank you, though.”

Fresh, slightly moist air filled my nose as I stepped outside. I sucked in deeply, getting scents of damp soil, wild flowers, and grass. Even in such a mood, those natural scents made me smile slightly. I tried my hardest to shrug off any thoughts of Twilight, the night before, or anything relating to those two things. It was very hard when my brain was filled with such things.

I looked down at watched as dewdrops hanging from the tips of grass, brushed onto my hooves, and dampened my fur. It felt rather nice. The water had grown slightly warm from the sun, but not so warm that it had evaporated. I scanned the land beneath me, watching as small bees and other insects buzzed from flower to flower, pollen thick around their legs.

The amount of flowers to be seen was astonishing. The colors ranged from bright, beautiful white to deep, elegant shades of purple. Their many unique, but wonderful scents were almost overwhelming. I couldn’t stop myself from sniffing the air every few seconds to soak up more. The heat of the sun was getting somewhat intense as it beamed down upon my back. Luckily, I was getting close to the forest’s edge.

As the land around me grew dark with the shadows of the large, thick canopy above, the air grew damper, and cooler. The smell of soil, rotting leaves, and bark was much more intense there. The many sounds of busy birds, rodents, and other critters filled my ears as they traveled through the bush, and trees. Some came out to greet me; while others, I only got a glimpse of as they hurried through the forest.

Even though I was trying my hardest to forget, thoughts about Twilight, of my friends, and of my mistake kept returning to my mind. I was sure I couldn’t bear being around her any longer; and that meant the girls too. If I was spending time with them, I was bound to see Twilight again at some point. What would my life be like away from them? I wasn’t going to try, but I had a feeling I’d slowly begin disassociating myself from them. I loved them, but everything was just so different after what I’d done, everything was so wrong. Even if I tried to pretend it never happened, my life would be a lie. That was just as rough.

I cringed as tears once again streamed down my face. I’d just have to accept my fate, living alone with my animals. I’d only head into town if I absolutely needed to. It’d be a very lonely life, but at least it sounded better than my other options. At least my life would be free of any awkward situations.

I sighed heavily, and slumped down by a tree, letting my back rest against its rough surface. I knew I couldn’t live like that. I needed my friends; and even though it didn’t seem like it at times, I knew they needed me too. I’d just need some time to adjust. Being out in the calm, peaceful forest was the perfect way to do so.

My body grew more and more relaxed as I rested. My senses dulled, and my back leaned more heavily against the tree. My lack of sleep was finally catching up to me. The world around me blurred. The length between my blinks grew longer, and longer until finally, they stayed shut. I was asleep.

***

“There you are,” a muffled voice echoed through my ears. I tried to ignore it, to pretend it wasn’t there so I could sleep. “When you weren’t at home, I had a feeling you’d be out here somewhere. I’m just glad I found you.”

I slowly blinked my eyes opened. Ignoring it wasn’t helping. Besides, it would be rude not to respond. Through my blurred vision, I saw a familiar shaded figure standing before me. I realized the voice was very familiar too. “Twilight?” I mumbled, rubbing my hooves against my tired eyes.

“Yes?” she asked in a calm, comforting tone.

“What are you doing here?”

“Um…well, I’m really sorry I left. What you said was just a little too much for me to handle. I needed some time to think about it. I did say we’d stick through this together, didn’t I?”

I nodded my head softly, blinking up into her warm eyes. “You don’t look so good,” she said as she took a seat beside me. “I didn’t mean to hurt you even more… I’ve just... never really done anything like this before.” She shook her head softly and wrapped a hoof around my waist. “I do love you, you know? I just don’t know if I love you as a friend, or something more.”

“Oh?” I asked, feeling my cheeks warming up as I gazed into her eyes. Her stare was soft as she looked back.

“I think the problem is that I escalated our relationship too quickly. If I would have known you were actually that into me; I don’t think I would’ve pushed having sex at all. I was just assuming I’d get off easy since we’re both close friends. I was thinking we were just going to have a fun night, and that’d be it…” she blushed deeply as she took a pause. “Well, maybe more than one fun night; but it was a really dumb decision. I was hoping that maybe we could start things over. We can start hanging out even more… and maybe try a date, a real date at some point? I’m not sure how soon, but I’ll think about it.”

“Um…” I mumbled shyly. I couldn’t believe she had turned things around so quickly. Or maybe she never had turned things around? Maybe that morning she just hadn’t built up enough courage to speak her true feelings, or accept that fact that she did like me. I was sure it was just as awkward for her.

“Look, it’s okay if you say no. I’ve screwed things up enough that I probably deserve it. I’ve just been thinking a lot about us after I left… and I just feel like maybe we do have some kind of connection. I’ve had so much fun with you the last couple of times we’ve been together.” She chuckled nervously as her blush deepened. “And I promise I don’t just mean what we did last night. I just feel so good around you; and maybe that means something. I just don’t know… this is all so confusing to me; but I at least want to give us a try.”

I shook my head. “No, I want this. I always have. I’m not going to say no now.”

“Good, because I really want us to have a chance… a real chance,” she said with a soft smile, her hoof tightening around me. I wrapped my hoof around her in response and sighed. “But for now we’re just friends, okay?” she said, her face growing red.

I nodded my head softly in response. “Of course. We’ll only take things further when you want to.”

“If I want to,” she said. “I just don’t want to get your hopes up again. It could happen, but it might not.” She shook her head softly and frowned. “No matter what though,” a slight, almost unnoticeable smile returned to her face, “we’ll always be friends, as close as we can get. I don’t want to ever lose you, Fluttershy. It might not end up being the same as what you’re looking for; but at least we’ll be together in a way.”

So that was it. It was a maybe, nothing more, nothing less. I still loved her more than anything in the entire world; but I guess I could deal with just being very close friends if worst came to worst. How long would that last though? I’m sure we wouldn’t be so close forever, especially if we couldn’t get any closer. It just didn’t work like that.

I never liked living in a world of chances, a world where nothing was ever set in stone. I tended to appreciate predictability. It was just comforting, safe, there was never any surprises. Life though, it was very unpredictable. Twilight had actually helped to show me that just letting it flow wasn’t such a bad thing at all. Because of her, I went to a dance concert, and actually had fun dancing. I had sex. Even if it was just once, she helped me realize that it wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. I did have a lot of fun after all. If I had the chance to do it over, I’d still say yes.

Taking chances wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. The decisions I made always had their good, and their bad. That was just life. I couldn’t fear the bad just because it might happen. That meant I was also rejecting the good. I was finally ready and willing to live life as it was meant to be. Twilight and I would give our relationship a chance; and if it didn’t work out, it just wasn’t meant to be. If it did, I’d be overjoyed.

“Um, Fluttershy?”

I quickly shook myself from my thoughts to see an almost concerned look on Twilight’s face. “That sounds like a wonderful plan, Twilight. I’m just glad to hear that you’ll always be here for me.” I smiled widely before giving her a quick kiss on the cheek. “I really do hope that it works out though.”

“Maybe,” she mumbled, blushing deeply.

Face Your Fears

I slowly, and as gently as possible, pried Twilight’s hooves away from my back. My heart pounded every time her body shifted. Even the slightest of movements was enough to set me off. She didn’t wake up though. I’m sure the alcohol had put her in a very deep sleep.

I let out a soft sigh of relief as I finally freed myself fully from her grasp. Then came the next challenge: getting off the bed without making too much noise or movement, and making my way downstairs. I slowly rolled over onto my opposite side, and slid myself over to the edge of the bed. Luckily, my eyes had adjusted to the darkness; and the glow of the moon helped to light up the silent room.

I gently slid my back hooves over the edge of the bed. A slight clack tickled at my ears as they made contact with the floor. Then with one more push I was on all fours.

My hoofsteps seemed to echo through the room as I slowly made my way to the door. It was slightly ajar, but I still had to open it further for my body to fit through. I cringed as its hinges made a slight squeak. My body froze, and my heart pounded heavily. I turned my head, expecting to see Twilight staring at me with a half-asleep expression. She was still sound asleep, her position the exact same as when I’d left her.

I quickly slipped through the doorway just in case she somehow managed to wake up. If she didn’t see me, then hopefully, she’d forget. I sighed with relief as I realized that the steps didn’t even make a sound beneath my hooves. After what seemed like ages, I finally reached the main library floor. My escape route was directly before me, glowing in the moonlight.

The door latch clicked open right as I placed my hoof on the nob. Twilight hadn’t closed the door fully, or even locked it for that matter. My heart skipped a beat, realizing that Spike could have walked in on as at any minute. Luckily, he didn’t.

I gently closed the door behind me, making sure to lock it for her. I was free. Now, all that was left was waiting for tomorrow to come. I knew I wouldn’t get any sleep. I’d be much too worried about whether or not Twilight would remember.

Suddenly, a voice called out from behind me. I jumped with shock and my heart fluttered painfully. “Fluttershy! There you are! I missed you so much!” Suddenly a pair of pink hooves wrapped around my neck.

“Oh…um…h-hello Pinkie…” I mumbled, turning to see all the girls, and Spike staring at me.

“What are you doing at Twilight’s?”

“I’m sure she was just being, well, I’d say a gentlecolt…but;” Rarity said, giving me a wink, “You know how much Twilight drinks at parties after all.”

“Nah, come on, Rarity. I know what was really going down!” Rainbow chimed in with a smirk, patting Rarity on the shoulder.

“And, what exactly would that be, dear?”

I gulped, knowing exactly what Rainbow was going to say; and knowing it would be true. Her smirk widened before she spoke. “They were totally banging!” She burst out into laughter. “Imagine that, right? Twi and Fluttershy? Actually, sorta hot if you ask me.”

“Is this true?” Rarity asked, tilting her head towards me. I could feel my body freezing up, my face growing red, and sweat beading up on my forehead.

“Definitely,” Rainbow said with a smug nod as she gave me a rather slow wink.

“I…um…um…” I stuttered out, watching my hoof scrape against the ground.

“You and Twilight are, like, lovers or something?” Spike asked.

Dash shook her head and chuckled. “Not so sure about that one, Spike. I think we may have caught Fluttershy in the act of a one night stand.”

“A one night what now?” he mumbled.

“I-I-I-I….I have to go!” I blurted out, nearly tripping over my hooves as I turned, and bolted for home. I didn’t want to hear any more of it. Now, I definitely knew Twilight would know exactly what we did. If she didn’t remember herself, the others would tell her. What was I to do? Hiding in my home would at least give me a little more time. That’s what I’d do.

The night air brushed against my face, and ruffled my mane as I trotted home as quickly as I could. It was oddly silent now. The concert had ended; and the sounds of nocturnal critters returned. It was relaxing in a way. The sound of nature always was, after all. It at least helped to calm my nerves a little.

That calmness didn’t last for long. Tears began to stream down my face as I thought of my wonderful night with Twilight. It would be the only time we’d ever do anything like that. The closest I’d probably ever get to her again would be a hug. I loved her so much. Even if it was a never ending lie, I’d do anything to have more nights with her like that one. I knew it wasn’t going to happen though. The next day would just bring pain and awkwardness.

I was still sobbing as I reached my door, perhaps even more so because I was so close to the sanctuary of my own home. Angel was there, waiting for me. I could see much concern is his little face. He was a bit demanding at times, but it was good to know how much he cared for me. I was in no mood to talk though.

“I’m…I’m so sorry…Angel,” I said between sobs. “I just…don’t want…to talk…right now.” He huffed at first, but then accepted my need to be alone. As I rushed up to my room, he stayed downstairs.

I fell down face forward on my bed, and bit down hard upon my blanket, its fabric dampening with each and every sob. I wanted to stop crying, but I just couldn’t. Muffled screams of agony escaped my mouth, and burst out into the room. A night of pure ecstasy, of paradise and pleasure, had taken a horrible turn.

***

The night was one of the longest I’d ever experienced. I was exhausted by the time the sun began to peek over the hills, and shine down warmly upon my cottage. Even though the day was vibrant and alive, it was as if the night had never ended inside. After finishing my routine of feeding all of my little critters, I sat down upon the couch.

I was cold, freezing for that matter. It was just my nerves; but it felt very real. I wrapped myself in the warmest, and thickest blanket I could find; one that I tended to use on cold winter nights. I hadn’t even attempted to take a shower that morning. After all, I’d be inside the whole day anyways. My mane was a fright, my eyes were still wet with tears; and large bags hung beneath my eyes.

My body shook with a combination of nerves, and the chill they caused. The critters sat near me, my sorrow reflected in their faces. They were close, but not too close, knowing that I could burst into another fit of sobs at any moment. Even though I had told them I didn’t want any company; it was nice to be in their presence anyways.

I was expecting a knock on my door at any moment. Even the slightest of sounds made me cower with fear. I knew I couldn’t hide forever; and that doing so would most likely end up making things worse; but it was the only way I felt comfortable dealing with any problem. That’s the way I lived, cowering from everypony, and everything. It was terrible, but it was just the way it was. I tried to change; but there was no way I could. If I could just tell Twilight how I really felt, maybe things would be different.

It would be simple, muster up enough courage to head over to the library. Courage was very hard to come by though, especially after what had happened the previous night. I knew exactly how the day would pan out. I would tell myself over and over again that I’d muster up enough courage sooner or later. An hour or two later, I’d tell myself the same thing, and then again. No matter how hard I tried, I wouldn’t be making it to the library that day. I was already nervous enough that Twilight would come to me, and she did.

I gasped at a sudden knock on the door, a very quiet, almost unnoticeable knock. My ears were so attuned to even the slightest of noise though; that it seemed as loud as the music from the night before. I gulped, my body growing cold even in the warm embrace of my blanket. I knew I had to answer it; but I didn’t want to get up.

Struggling to unravel myself from the blankets, I finally stumbled onto my hooves, and trotted to the door. My heart began to pound as my hoof touched the cool handle. If it was Twilight, what would I say? I knew deep in my gut it was her.

My entire body trembled as the door slid open on its hinges. I turned my eyes to the floor so I wouldn’t see her face; but I knew it was her because of the lavender hooves my eyes had locked onto.

“Oh, um…T-Twilight…h-h-hello…” I managed to stutter out, sounding much more nervous than normal.

“Fluttershy,” she muttered awkwardly as I watched her hoof scrape at the ground. “I… well, I want to talk about last night. Can I, um, come in?”

I could feel my heart pounding more and more quickly; my body tensing even further. I couldn’t say no though. There was no point in closing the door on her. That would just make things even more awkward. Besides, I did want to tell her the truth after all. I was planning on heading to her; but she had come to me instead. It seemed to me that it would actually make things simpler, and even easier.

I nodded my head softly, never turning my eyes in her direction. “Thanks…” she said with a sigh. I got the feeling she was having just as rough of a time with this as I was. “Talk on the couch?”

I nodded my head again as a trembling, “meep!” escaped my mouth. I had planned on it being a “yes,” but of course that didn’t happen. I shuddered and headed for the couch. I knew the animals were watching both of our every moves. I tried my best to pretend they weren’t there.

Only looking at the floor, I managed to reach the couch, and gently take my seat. My heart fluttered with another rush of anxiety as I felt her weight sink the cushion beside me. What would she say? How would I respond? If I was already so nervous, how was I going to tell her what I wanted to say? My heart raced to the point which I thought I was going to pass out. Heavier, and heavier breaths escaped my mouth. I had plenty of air; but it was as if I barely had any.

“Anyways… about last night,” Twilight said quietly, almost in a whisper. “This is going to be really awkward, isn’t it?” she asked with a sigh. “Fluttershy, all of the girls already know. I know you’re trying to hide from it; but I think we’re just going to have to accept it. Everypony makes mistakes; and we both made one last night. Sometimes we just have to make those mistakes a part of us. They do make us better after all. We’re still friends, even after what we did. We can work through this together, okay?”

“I um…o-okay,” I muttered. I had to tell her what I needed to tell her. If I held back, she’d never know the truth. She must have thought I drank as much as she did. She thought I had made the same mistake. Well, I did make a mistake… but it was out of my own will. I knew she didn’t love me. She just wanted the sex. At least, drunk Twilight wanted it. By the way she was speaking, she seemed very ashamed of her actions.

“Good… now that does mean you’re going to have to come out of your house, okay? Like I said, we just have to accept what we did.”

I nodded my head hesitantly. “But um, um, Twilight…I-”

“I’m sorry, but we can’t have any “buts” either, okay? You’re going to have to face it, the sooner the better.”

I peaked up at her through mane, making sure my eyes were mostly hidden. Her eyes were a painful red, and a saddened almost desperate frown lingered on her lips. Even in such a state, she was still beautiful.

“Twi-Twilight…I, it’s um, not that…”

“Then…what is it?” Her eyes stared directly into my own as she questioned me. It was as if she was gazing into my soul, my thoughts, looking for the answer. I was panicking, the urge to flee sinking into my stomach. I had to tell her though… but I just couldn’t get it out.

Her gentle hoof brushed my bangs away from my eyes, causing me to blush deeply. My eyes darted away from her own, but soon returned. Through the thin film of glaze, I could see warmth and comfort in her eyes. At least I knew that she truly did care about me. It was just as a friend, but that still meant a lot to me. “What is it? You can tell me,” she said in a soft tone.

“I…I wasn’t drunk last night,” I whispered. As my face grew red, my body began to shiver.

“I know,” she responded, giving a nod. My heart pounded heavily. Maybe she remembered much more about last night than she’d first let off. “And I feel horrible about what I did to you last night, absolutely horrible. I took advantage of you… of course you’d be too polite to say no.” Her frown deepened, and she ruffled a hoof through her mane. “I’m so sorry, Fluttershy,” she mumbled, her voice broken. Empathetic tears formed in my eyes as she began to weep.

Almost instinctually, I wrapped a hoof around her waist, and nuzzled myself into the fur on her chest. “No, Twilight… you’re an amazing friend. You never took advantage of me; and I know for a fact that you never would. You even asked me again if I wanted to….um, with you before we headed into the library. I…I said yes; and I meant it…”

“You… did?” Twilight asked in astonishment, her eyes growing wide. She turned away from my gaze as her cheeks grew pink. “Well…that makes me feel a little better, at least,” she said with an awkward chuckle. “I…uh, never knew you were into mares, Fluttershy.”

If my face could have grown any redder than it already was, it would have. I nodded my head softly. “Yeah… I guess I sort of always have been. I like stallions too, I guess… but only some.”

“Hmm, so you’re bisexual, but leaning towards the mare side?” she asked, a pep returning to her voice as curiosity overtook her. “I’m not really sure exactly what my feelings are. I mean, last night I was experimenting, of course; but I still have no clue what my sexual orientation really is. I think I’m bisexual too though.” She paused a moment, her blush deepening. “I’m… well, I’m really glad my first time ended up being with you. I’m glad it wasn’t with…you know, some random pony or anything. You’re a really close friend; and I feel comfortable with you.”

My heart pounded lovingly; and I had the sudden urge to move closer to her. I didn’t, of course. She was actually fine, even content with me being her first? “Anyways, I know my curiosity got the better of me; and it seems to be doing it again; but why exactly did you say yes last night?”

My loving heartbeats turned into harsh pounds of fear. “Oh… um… well, I guess… never mind…” I muttered, almost beneath my breath.

She wrapped a comforting hoof around my shoulders. “Come on, Fluttershy. It’s okay. It’ll be a secret between you and me.”

My body shook and shivered violently as I tried to push the words out. I knew exactly what I had to tell her; but once again, my nerves were preventing me. I couldn’t hold back though. I had to tell her now; or I never would.

“Twilight… I did it because I…um, I’m…I think I’m in love…with you.”

Her face grew a deep shade of red as I finished my sentence. Her body froze as still as a statue, all except her growing eyes. “Oh… I guess that explains a lot then; doesn’t it?”

I softly nodded my head. Her weakening hoof pulled awkwardly away from my shoulders. With a few simple adjustments, she then made a safe distance of space between us. The inevitable had come. Twilight had never felt the same way as I did of her; and now, I had most likely ruined our friendship from what I’d said. Things would just be much too awkward between us. I was beginning to think that saying nothing would have been a much better choice. I could feel tears welling up in my eyes. With just a few key words, I would burst.

“Now, I really feel bad,” she mumbled. “I’m sorry, Fluttershy… but I just, I really don’t think we’d be good as anything more than friends. I’m sorry I lead you on. It’s okay if you don’t forgive me. I really screwed up… when you said you loved me last night…” she paused, giving a loud gulp. “You meant it.”

“I did,” I whimpered, the tears flowing in full force.

“I am so sorry.” By the way Twilight spoke, I could tell she was in a lot of pain. I wasn’t sure if it was empathy, the fact that she had done something so horrible to her friend, or a combination of both. I could feel her hooves embracing me in a hug; but she quickly pulled away. “Look, Fluttershy…I really don’t know exactly how we can deal with this yet. I’m going to leave. I did say we were in this together though. We still will be… Just, I need time to think, okay?” I felt the cushions shift as she stepped up onto her hooves.

“Bye,” she whispered as she quickly made her way to the door. I shook my head in disgust. I had a feeling she wasn’t coming back. The door shut quietly; and sobs once again burst from my mouth.