Setting the Rules: A Lesson in Love

by Compendium of Steve

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Rarity, Fluttershy, Random, Pinkie Pie, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other, Romance
Length: 1037

When love is in doubt, count on a friend to show you how it really is.

In the wake of heartbreak, Rarity is left caring for a jilted Fluttershy. Yet she may find no better opportunity to do more than just tend to her saddened friend. But can she succeed, or will fate make it impossible? The important thing is that one must learn to roll with the punches.

(Written a long time ago for the /mlp/chan writing contest "Setting the Rules". Once thought lost, I now share with you. Enjoy!)

Published 2014-08-11 09:00:03 UTC
Last updated 2014-08-11 09:00:03 UTC

What's Going On

Within the cozy confines of Fluttershy's cottage, Rarity was cooing her heartbroken pegasus friend. The poor pink-maned filly was much aggrieved and overcome with sobbing, and considering the blow she had been dealt earlier, it came as no surprise.

"I, I just can't believe it," Fluttershy choked out the tear-filled words into Rarity's shoulder. "It was, it was supposed to be perfect!"

"There there, darling. It's alright," Rarity said, brushing her friend's mane gently with her hoof.

"No it's not! Big Macintosh was my one and only, but he just, just—!"

The timid animal-lover couldn't finish, instead breaking into more sobbing. Rarity remained vigilant in her compassion as she let her friend's tears flow.

"Yes, it was quite startling for him to outright reject you like that. Honestly, I thought you both fit marvelously for each other," Rarity said. "But you have to understand, dear Fluttershy: We're no strangers to love. You know the rules, and so do I—"

"But a full commitment's what I'm thinking of!"

"Yes yes, and you thought you wouldn't get it from any other guy," Rarity resumed. "But, Fluttershy darling, as both your friend and long-time spa partner, I just want to tell you how I'm feeling. I've got to make you understand."

"Huh?" Fluttershy paused in her despair-athon as she looked into Rarity's gentle blue eyes.

"I want to tell you that, no matter what, I'll never give you up, never let you down, never run around and desert you."

"But, you've run around plenty—"

"Never will I make you cry, nor will I ever say goodbye. And above all else, I'll never tell a lie and hurt you."

"B-but, Rarity? You've told lies plenty of times."

"Oh, why, yes," Rarity admitted with a blush. "Well, none of them hurt you, did they?"

"Well, no, I guess not," Fluttershy agreed shakily.

"Good. Now that you know how good a friend I am, I say it's time we—"

"NOT SO FAST, HUSSY!"

With a thunderous crash of wood, the front door flew in across the living room. From the open doorway, Rarity gasped at the sight of a very hot-blooded Pinkie Pie, adorned in a suavey trench coat!

"Pinkie Pie! What are you doing here!" Rarity exclaimed, holding Fluttershy's head close to her chest.

"Don't play dumb, Rarity!" Pinkie said while pointing an accusing hoof at the fashionista. "We've known each other for so long; your heart's been aching, but you're too shy to say it!"

"Whatever are you talking about? Did you drink too much rainbow again?" Rarity asked.

"W-what's going on?" Fluttershy said half-pleadingly.

"I'm trying to keep you from taking my mare!" Pinkie did the somersault across the room and onto the coffee table before the two other ponies. Looking down on them, she then said, "Rarity! Inside we both know what's been going on! You've wanted to make the moves on Fluttershy for quite some time. Big Mac's rejection was just the windfall you needed to make your confession. However, we BOTH know the game, and I'M gonna play!"

There's a considerable pause as the three ponies just looked at each other, until Rarity calmly said, "Pinkie Pie, darling. You're saying quite a lot. Now, I honestly can't say what I think of it, but," she paused briefly, as though wrestling with some deep internal conflict. "But, if you asked me how I'm feeling…"

Pinkie leapt down from the table and slammed her forehooves onto the table, snapping the other two fillies to full attention. "Darn it, Rarity! Don't tell me you're too blind to see! I would never give you up, never let you down, never run around and desert you! I would never make you cry, never say goodbye, never tell a lie or hurt you!"

At this proclamation, Rarity lifted her head. "Wait... So, you wouldn't give me up, or let me down, or run around or desert me?" Pinkie nodded vigorously to this as Rarity continued, "Nor would you ever make me cry, or say goodbye, or tell a lie?"

"OR HURT YOU EITHER!" Pinkie cried as she leapt back onto the table, only now she was kneeling on one hindleg. "Don't you see, Rarity? I Love You!"

Rarity let out a heartfelt gasp as she stood up abruptly, letting go of Fluttershy's head in order to cover her mouth. "Oh, Pinkie Pie! I was a fool not to realize that you felt the same way! But I had thought it was a lost cause."

"There's nothing lost when it comes to Pinkie Pie," Pinkie said with a wink. Rarity started swooning amidst all the fiery passion and revelation.

"Oh take me, my one and only!"

Rarity threw herself into Pinkie Pie's forelegs, and with her love in her hooves, the perky pink pony skipped away, out the door and into the vast bountiful expanse that was their future! Meanwhile, Fluttershy found herself alone and immensely confused.

"But… But I still have nopony!"

"For now, maybe."

"GASP! Rick Astley!"

And lo and behold, standing there in the living room was the swanky master crooner of love himself, in full trench coat and sunglasses attire. Though immediately star-struck, Fluttershy was quick to recover and ask, "But, why are you here?"

"To see everything goes the way it should," he answered most smoothly. "Love is a complex game, with set rules for every occasion and encounter. In the case of those two, it's the bold and unabashed that get the happy ending. But don't worry yourself; someday you'll get your special someone. Plus, there isn't a rule that says you can't try twice on the same guy."

"Wow. Thank you, Mr. Astley! I'll keep the hope alive!"

"Be sure that you do," he said, and then turned to the door with a contented sigh. "My work here is done; time to deliver my profound wisdom somewhere else."

Taking his leave, the marvelous Rick Astley returned to his back-flipping bartender valet, and together they ascended toward the heavens, where new worlds and new games of love were in play and in need of a seasoned referee. And really, that's just the way to roll.

THE END

Author's Note

I REGRET NOTHING!!