A Moment in the Sun

Chapters

A Moment of Curiosity
A Moment of Anger
A Moment of Regret

A Moment of Curiosity

I never liked it when Mommy and Daddy took me to the palace. In fact, I hated it.

Not because there was anything wrong with the palace. It was really big and fancy and impressive, and all the decorations were really pretty. The guardponies had been a bit scary at first, but Daddy told me they were nice, and the one I tried talking to was.

The reason I never liked coming to the palace was because of my parents. They were both really important magi, so whenever they came to the palace it was always to go to some room and talk to a lot of other really important ponies. And since they were talking about stuff that was way too important for a filly like me to listen to, I had to wait until they were done. They already had to spend a lot of time away from home doing magus stuff, so it really stank when they had to spend the time when they were home meeting with ponies and stuff instead of with me. Especially when I had to sit around waiting for them.

This time it was about magical gems or something. You wouldn’t think magical gems would be really boring, but they are. Especially when adults talk about them for hours and hours and hours.

I groaned and rolled around on the stone bench, checking the clock again. Usually when they were gonna be gone for a long time, they left me with a foalsitter or a guardpony or something. But this was one of those meetings that was only supposed to last five minutes, so they told me to just sit outside and wait patiently and quietly until they were done. Too bad the five minute meeting had started half an hour ago, and didn’t look like it was gonna end any time soon.

I desperately looked around the room for something, anything, to keep myself occupied. I didn’t have any luck. They didn’t even have any old magazines or some old pamphlets like they do at the doctor’s office. Just a cold stone bench, and the guard standing in front of the doors. He was one of the really stiff and formal ones who wouldn’t even say anything to me I know I said some of the guards were really nice, but that was when they were allowed to be nice. Right now this one still had to be a guard, so he couldn’t do any too-nice stuff with me.

I could groan about how bored I was, but that would just get me in trouble for making noise that would bother everypony at my parents’ important meeting. I wish I’d brought a book or something, Normally I would’ve, but this was supposed to be one of those meetings that would only last a couple minutes.

Ugh! So bored!

I got up and tried pacing around for a bit, but that didn’t do any good. I was just bored while walking instead of being bored while sitting. I was still stuck waiting in front of a door, with nothing to do. I needed a change of scenery. Something. Anything.

I walked up to the guard. “I need to use the bathroom. Where is it?”

“Down the hall and to the right.” The guardpony glanced back at the door behind him, then turned to me. “I think I can walk you most of the way there without leaving my post, if you need some help.”

“I’m fine.” I’d gotten my cutie mark a few days ago, I was way too old to need an adult to walk me to the bathroom. Besides, I didn’t really need to go. I just wanted to go exploring a little. I would stay in the palace—there were all kinds of neat things here, and just being stuck waiting in front of this one boring door was a huge waste of time. Mommy and Daddy might get a little upset, but they had magic they could use to find me if they really wanted to. Besides, making them come look for me was what they deserved after how long I’d waited.

I walked off towards the bathroom, but once I was sure the door guard couldn’t see me anymore I shifted course and went deeper into the palace. I didn’t have any particular destination in mind, I just wanted to look around and see all the neat stuff in here. In fact, one of the big problems with the palace is that there are so many cool things that I didn’t know where to start.

Maybe the library? The Royal Library has all kinds of neat books about magic and stuff, and I wanted to learn all about magic. After all, Mommy and Daddy were magi, so I wanted to grow up to be one too. Once I learned enough magic, one of them was gonna take me as their apprentice, and then I would get to spend a lot more time with them.

But on the other hoof, I could read books anytime I wanted. Mommy and Daddy had plenty of magic books at home, and even if most of them were way too complicated for me, there were still plenty of ones I could read whenever I wanted to. And I could read anytime I wanted to, but this might be my only chance to explore the Royal Palace!

Being in the palace made my destination rather obvious. The whole reason the Royal Palace was interesting was because it was where the princess was. And obviously she would be in the throne room, because that’s where a princess does all her princess-y things from. So that’s where I needed to go if I wanted to do something I could only do at the palace.

Finding the throne room wasn’t too hard, because there were these big maps of the palace posted in a couple places to help everypony find their way around. The Royal Palace is really big, and ponies come from all over Equestria to come visit it, so they have the maps so nopony gets lost. Though I’ve heard there are a bunch of secret rooms and passages that aren’t on the maps, and they’ve got all kinds of secret stuff there like dragons and hidden treasure and spies!

But I didn’t want to go exploring for secrets right now, ‘cause I didn’t know how to find them. And nopony could tell me either, ‘cause if everypony knew about the secret rooms then they wouldn’t be secret rooms.

So instead I went to the throne room. Maybe Princess Celestia could tell me about the palace’s secret rooms? After all, if anypony would know all about the palace’s secrets, it would be the Princess. It was her palace, after all.

I trotted off to the throne room, stopping a couple times along the way to check the maps and make sure I was still going the right way. When I finally got to the hallway leading to the throne room, I had to check the map again to make sure I was in the right place. The corridor was really impressive and had a lot of pretty stained-glass windows, but the door at the end of the hallway didn’t have any guards on it, and I thought there were always supposed to be guards standing in front of the throne room to make sure ponies didn’t bother Princess Celestia.

Once I walked through the big double doors, I figured out why there weren’t any guards. The princess wasn’t here, so of course they wouldn’t be here either. The whole room was empty, except for the throne that was up on its raised dais. It felt really weird and a little bit creepy being in such a big throne room without anypony else here.

I walked up to the throne, since it was the only other thing in the room. It was really big. Though I guess that made sense, because Princess Celestia was really big too. She would have to have a throne that was big enough for her, or else she would look really weird and silly.

I took another look around the room, just to make sure there wasn’t anypony else around. There wasn’t. I had the throne room all to myself.

Feeling daring, I hopped up onto the throne. I’d needed a bit of a running start to actually make the jump, and I wound up bonking my muzzle on the back because I couldn’t stop in time. It was worth it. After all, I was sitting on Princess Celestia’s throne!

I got comfy, then turned around to face the room. “I am Princess Sunset Shimmer, and I say that school and bedtimes are cancelled forever, and everypony have to make me dessert at least five times a day!”

“Five desserts a day?” I jumped in surprise at the voice coming from behind me. I’d checked the room twice, so there was no way somepony could be in here without me noticing them. Except somehow, I’d missed whoever had just said that. “Goodness me, that's a lot of dessert. My poor chefs would have to work themselves to the bone making that much cake.”

I looked around again and finally found the pony who’d said all of that. Princess Celestia was standing right next me. Princess Celestia. And she’d seen everything I did. “Ack!” I tried to get off of the throne as fast as possible, but that just made all my hooves pick a different direction to go in. I wound up tripping over myself and fell, heading muzzle-first for the marble steps below.

I braced for a rough landing, but before I hit, a golden glow enveloped me, and then I was floating in the air. I looked back at the princess and saw her horn glowing as the magic set me back down on my hooves. Once I was safely on the ground, she let out a soft chuckle. “Maybe for your next decree, you should consider adding safety rails to the throne? That, or making a new throne that’s a bit more suited to your size.”

I giggled at the joke, but a second later I remembered just who I was talking to. “P-princess Celestia!” I nearly fell over again as I scrambled to bow down before her. “I'm sorry for sitting on your throne! Please don't banish me!”

Thankfully, instead of doing that, she just laughed. A nice laugh, not some kinda mean bad guy laugh. “Banish you? Oh child, where did you get such a silly idea?” She took a couple steps closer and sat down next to me on the stairs. I’d never realized how huge she was before. I mean, everypony knows that Princess Celestia’s bigger than any other pony, but she just towered over a little filly like me. She smiled down at me. “You don’t need to worry, I won’t do anything like that. How could I banish a child for merely indulging their curiosity? I'm sure you didn't intend to show any kind disrespect for me by sitting on my throne, right?”

“No!” I hastily agreed. “I was just playing around, ‘cause nopony else was here.” I looked up at her, and offered a relieved little smile. “So you’re not mad?”

“Not at all,” she assured me. “In fact, it was an absolute delight to see somepony having a little fun with something that’s really just a fancy chair. However, I’m afraid I won’t be able to go along with your first royal decree; school, bedtimes, and proper meals are important for growing young fillies.” She leaned in and whispered, “Though just between you and me, I hated them too when I was your age.”

“Really?” It was hard to imagine that somepony as big and old and important as Princess Celestia had even been a filly like me. I mean, she was Princess Celestia!

“Well, we didn’t exactly have proper schools when I was your age, but I was an absolute terror to my tutors. I certainly would have preferred to stay up late and eat lots of sweets, as well.” She took one of my hooves in her huge one and gave it a gentle shake. “ It’s nice to meet you, Sunset Shimmer.”

I blinked in surprise at that. “You know my name?”

“I know all of my little ponies.” She paused, and then she gave me a teasing little grin. “Besides, you did declare yourself ‘Princess Sunset Shimmer’ a few minutes ago.”

“Oh yeah...” It was pretty silly to think somepony as important as Princess Celestia would know about me. I’m just a kid. “I guess I better go so you can do princess stuff, right?” If Mommy and Daddy were always busy with magus stuff, then a princess would probably be way busier with princess stuff.

Princess Celestia nodded, her tone quiet and serious. “Oh yes, I have quite a bit of princess stuff to do.” She turned back to me, and smiled. “Thankfully, one of the more important princess things I need to take care of involves you, so there's no need for us to part company just yet.”

“Me?” I tried to wrap my head around the idea. “But why would a princess care about me? I’m just ... I’m me.”

“I care about all of my little ponies, Sunset. Even the ones that most ponies would say have ordinary, boring, and unimportant lives.” She stood up, and motioned for me to do the same. “However, you have much more ahead of you than most ponies. More than even you know.” She waved a hoof towards my flank. “I see you already have your cutie mark.”

I grinned at the reminder and shifted around so she could see it better. “Yeah, I got it a couple days ago. Isn't it neat?”

“It's a very nice cutie mark.” Her eyes drifted back to her own mark. “Admittedly, I’ve always been rather partial to ones that feature the sun. Would you mind telling me what it represents?”

“Um...” I didn’t really know exactly what it meant. I mean, I knew what my special talent was and everything, but a cutie mark’s more than just that. It’s really complicated, and I didn’t wanna explain it wrong and look silly in front of the princess. “I guess it’s kinda like the sun, and the sun’s a big ball of fire and stuff. That would make sense, ‘cause I can make fire. You wanna see?”

The princess smiled and took a step back. “I'd love to. Just make sure you don’t accidently burn the palace down.”

“I’ll be careful, but it’s okay. I can’t make that much fire yet.” I closed my eyes and concentrated really hard. I was still getting used to casting magic spells other than the basic stuff like telekinesis and light. After a little bit of work, a tiny little ball of fire popped up, hovering in front of my face.

Princess Celestia lightly tapped her hooves on the floor in applause. “That's very impressive for a filly your age. Though it looked like you had to try very hard to actually make fire. Are you just creating it from nothing?”

“What do you mean?” I frowned, trying to puzzle out what she meant. “There wasn’t fire before, so I gotta make the fire exist with my magic, right?”

“That is one way of doing things.” Her tone then changed, and it reminded me of some of my teachers at the School for Gifted Unicorns. “However, let me offer you a bit of advice. You see, creating fire is ultimately a matter of finding the heat for it, and heat is everywhere. I think you’ll find it is much easier if you take all the heat that’s just lying around, and draw it all to a single central point. Using what’s already there is almost always easier than creating something from nothing. Like this.” Her horn lit up, and she created a little flame just like mine. “Do you think you could try making fire my way?”

“Sure.” It wasn’t like anypony could tell the princess no when she asked them to do something. I took a look at her spell, and tried to figure out how she was doing it. It didn’t look too hard. I mean, it was more complicated than the way I did things, but I didn’t think it was too hard for me to figure it out.

I closed my eyes again and concentrated on using my magic to pull in all the heat just like she told me to. It wasn’t too hard at first, but when I cast the spell there was just a sudden flash of heat and light, and then nothing.

“You can’t gather all the heat at once,” the princess explained. “It has to be gradual and controlled.” She pointed to the ball of fire hovering in front of her face. “If you want to create something like this, you need a slow, constant, steady flow of heat.”

“Okay.” I closed my eyes and tried it again. This time I managed to actually create a sputtering flame that lasted half a second before it died. After a dozen more tries, I was finally able to keep a flame going the way Princess Celestia was. Or at least close enough to how she was doing it; my spell still looked weird and clunky compared to how perfect hers was. She’d been right about it being easier: once I’d gotten used to using the trick the princess had showed me, I could make fire with a lot less effort than it had taken before.

I grinned up at her. “Thanks, Princess Celestia! That really helped.” I waved a hoof near my flame to see how warm it was and pulled back in surprise. The fire putting off a lot of heat, but once my hoof got a little bit away from it the air around it was cold. Though that made sense; I was taking the heat out of the air to make my fire.

An idea popped into my head. “Princess Celestia? Can I have a glass of water?”

“Of course, Sunset.” One spell later, there was a glass of water resting right in front of me.

I looked down at the glass and tried to focus on it. It shouldn’t be that different to take heat out of water instead of out of the air. It’s still just heat, right?

It turned out to be a bit more complicated than that. The first thing I noticed while siphoning heat was that the water felt a lot more… slippery. Maybe it was hard ‘cause everypony knows water and fire don’t really go together. I still managed to draw the heat out, it just took a lot more work than it had before. As a new flame took shape, the water slowly froze from bottom to top, until I was left with a glass full of solid ice.

Princess Celestia looked down at the glass, then nodded and gave me an approving smile. I’d always hoped Mother would do something like that when she started teaching me magic. “Very good, Sunset.” I stood a bit taller and puffed my chest out a little at her praise. “Many ponies can go for years without realizing what you just found out about how fire magic works. It has been more than eight centuries since I’ve seen a pony with your natural gift for pyromancy.” A hint of a smile crossed her face. “In fact, that same mare wrote the magical principle you just demonstrated. Sunbeam’s First Law of Thermodynamics: cold is nothing more than the absence of heat.”

The fact that Princess Celestia herself was praising me brought a modest blush to my cheeks. “It was just a little bit of fire and ice.”

“For now, yes.” She set a hoof on my shoulder. “But that is only natural. A filly of your age can hardly be expected to have mastered the magical arts. That you have learned as much as you have is a credit to you, and from such small things as your tiny flame, great spells can be born. In time, you might even be able to cast a spell like ... this.” Her horn lit up, and a huge blast of fire shot up towards the ceiling, stopping halfway there. Then it spread out and twisted around, and the fire itself changed colors, until it was a perfect match for my own cutie mark.

My jaw dropped at the display. “Wooow. That’s amazing!”

“Thank you, Sunset.” Princess Celestia patted me on the head. “Of course, it takes many years of practice to manage that level of showmareship with one’s pyromancy. And I imagine many would judge it a somewhat impractical use of my talents, regardless of how impressive it looks.”

I looked up at the display and wistfully commented, “I wish I could do something that cool.”

The princess looked down at me and offered an indulgent smile. The kind adults always give when they’re humoring a kid. “Maybe you will one day. Assuming you have a good teacher, of course.”

“Really?” I tried to imagine doing something like that, but it was hard to see it when right now I had to concentrate just to make a little bit of ordinary fire. I knew I would probably be really good at magic one day because of how good my parents were, but right now it all seemed so far away. “How am I ever gonna learn to do spells like that?”

“The same way most promising young unicorns do, I imagine. Somepony will teach you what you need to know, and you’ll learn the rest on your own.” Princess Celestia paused and looked me over. “I assume your parents have been teaching you magic?”

“A little, yeah.” I shuffled on my hooves, and admitted the truth. “Well, mostly they just bought me a couple books to read over. Mommy and Daddy said they really wanna help me learn magic, but they’ve just been so busy doing magus stuff that they don’t have time for that.”

“Ah.” She didn’t say much for a bit after that. I hope she wasn’t feeling sad ‘cause my parents were busy. After all, since she was the princess she could probably un-busy them if she really, really wanted to. “I presume they’re participating in the conclave happening in the east wing, then?”

“Yeah.” I wasn’t sure if they were actually doing that, but they’d been in east part of palace so that was probably it. “They said it was supposed to be really quick, but it was taking a long time and I got tired of waiting, so I went exploring and then I thought about some secret passages that were supposed to be in the castle and I figured you would know where those passages are ‘cause you’re the princess, so I found the throne room and ... well, then I met you.”

“Indeed you did.” Her eyes lingered on me, and she seemed a little sad. “I’m sorry your parents are so busy, but I’m sure you realize they’re doing very important work. I believe today’s conclave has gone long due to some warlock trouble. The reason your parents are so busy is because they’re working to help keep you and everypony else safe.”

“I know.” I sighed and slumped down on the floor. “But I still miss them...” The Princess didn’t say anything, but her horn lit up, and a second later there was a plate with a slice of cake sitting in front of me. I remembered my manners. “Thanks, Princess.”

“It was my pleasure, Sunset.” While I ate the cake with my best table manners, Princess Celestia looked at me. It wasn’t a normal kind of looking either. It’s hard to say what exactly was different about it, but it was definitely different. Deeper, I guess. Like she was seeing way more than just me. Or maybe she was just seeing way more of me than anypony else ever could. Either way, it made me feel really nervous. Like when you’re in the school play, except you know your costume is messed up and you’ve forgotten half your lines, and you’re hoping nopony will notice how wrong everything is before you can get off the stage. It was like that, except a lot worse, ‘cause she was Princess Celestia. If she didn’t like looking at me it’d probably get Mommy and Daddy in trouble too.

The Princess gave me a smile and a gentle pat on the back, and I was sure she’d seen past my face and found out just how nervous I was. “There there, I didn’t mean to worry you, Sunset. I was just trying to get to know you a bit better. You are a very special little filly, after all.”

“Huh? I'm special?” I tried to figure out what that was supposed to mean. “How am I special?”

“You have incredible potential for greatness within you. I would hate to see all that potential go to waste.” One of her huge wings wrapped over my shoulders. “It's not every day I see a child on my throne and issuing commands as if she were born for it, after all.”

Reminding me of what she’d caught me doing made me feel guilty all over again. “I'm really sorry about sitting on your throne, Miss Princess. Please don't tell Mommy and Daddy.”

“It’ll be our secret.” She winked at me, and one of her hooves came up and ruffled my mane. “Though I should caution you not to do that again. If anypony else had walked in on you, they might not have been so understanding. You might even have been sent to bed without dessert, and that is a fate I would not wish on any child.” She chuckled. “And now all this talk is making me hungry for some cake. Perhaps after our other business is finished.”

“Other business?” I frowned and tried to figure out what she meant by that. “What do you mean? Is there something you want me to do?

She paused and looked toward the doors. “Surely you’ve wondered why there were no guards keeping you from entering the throne room, and why I’m here alone? This meeting was not a matter of random chance. I came here to meet you, and you were drawn to my throne room in order to meet me.”

I hadn’t really thought of that before, but she was right. Normally there would be a guardpony whose job was to make sure nopony snuck into the throne room and stole the throne or sat on it or something. Still, the rest of what she said didn’t make any sense. “Why would you wanna meet me, and how would I know to go to the throne to meet you? I was just exploring, and...”

“Of course, it’s not that destiny drew you to this place, you just arrived here by happy coincidence.” She smiled and ran a hoof over my mane. “I find that fate seems to enjoy hiding its designs. You see, I believe that everypony has a destiny, Sunset. We all have our paths, and all of our choices in life will affect the direction they take. Sometimes our destiny will not take the form we expect, but in the end it will be fulfilled.”

I stared at her, trying to process it all. “Are you saying you let me in here because I have some kinda destiny?”

“I am.” She extended one of her hooves to me. “You have a great destiny before you, Sunset Shimmer. One I would dearly love to help you forge.”

“You wanna help me?” This was all getting to be a bit too much. I had a special destiny. One that Princess Celestia wanted to help me figure out. This morning I’d been trying to figure out if I wanted orange juice or chocolate milk with breakfast. “But you're the princess, and I'm just ... well I’m me.”

“Yes, you are.” She shook her head. “It never ceases to amaze me, how so many ponies can see themselves as nothing but ordinary. How they fail to grasp that everypony is a unique and special individual, precious and irreplaceable.” She looked down at me, and her face looked super-serious even though her voice was still nice and gentle. “Never forget that you are a very special pony in your own right.”

“Really?” I’d never heard anything like that before. “How special?”

“Very special.” Her eyes turned to the throne. “You seemed quite at home on my throne. Perhaps some day, if you work very hard and learn everything I have to teach you, you’ll have one of your own. Though for now, I think I have a question for you: Would you like to become my apprentice?”

“Me? Become your apprentice?” I couldn’t believe my own ears. Princess Celestia wanted me to be her apprentice. Me!

Celestia answered me with a smile that had just a tiny bit of mirth in it. “Of course, you’re under no obligation to accept if you don’t want to—”

“Yes!” I quickly cut in, jumping up as high as I could to make sure she heard me. “Yes! I wanna be your apprentice! More than anything in the history of anything! Please let me be your apprentice! Please please please!”

The Princess smirked and ruffled my mane. “Considering I asked you first, I don’t know why you think I wouldn’t want you as my student. However, to make things official, yes. I, Princess Celestia, do hereby declare that Sunset Shimmer is my personal apprentice.”

“Yay!” I started bouncing around the room and singing at the top of my lungs. “I’m the princess’ student! I’m Celestia’s apprentice!” I kept that up for a bit, until I noticed that the princess was giving me one of those patient looks adults always give kids when the kid is acting really silly, but the adult doesn’t wanna make a big deal over it or tell them to stop. It took a bit, but I managed to settle down and not act too excited about it all. “I'm gonna be your apprentice! This is so cool! I promise I'll study really hard every day!”

“Well, hopefully not every day. Anypony who tries to do that would wear themselves out.” The princess smiled, and put one of her wings around me to pull me up closer. “I’m sure we can fit some time for friends and leisure into your training schedule. And of course we will need to tell your parents, once they’re done with their business.”

“Oh yeah!” I’d almost completely forgotten about them, I’d been so excited about being Princess Celestia’s student. For a moment I was worried they’d be sad I wouldn’t be studying with them, but they were probably too busy to really help me anyway. It wasn’t like they’d ever had time for me before. Besides, having me trained by the princess would probably be a big honor. “Mommy and Daddy are gonna be so proud of me!”

The princess answered by giving me a little squeeze with her wing. “I think they will be very proud of you, Sunset. You deserve it.”

Yeah, I did. I had a special destiny, after all. “So, what're you gonna teach me first?”

Princess Celestia chuckled and ruffled my mane again. “Well, somepony’s eager. Slow down just a little, Sunset. I’m glad you want to get straight to work, but I still need to draw out my lesson plans and decide exactly what I’m going to teach you first. Obviously we’ll be focusing on pyromancy, but I don’t want to restrict you to being a one-trick pony. Not to mention all the other details to sort out, such as arranging for your room in the palace.”

“My room?” It took me a second to figure out what exactly that meant. “I get to stay in the palace? That’s so cool!”

“I’m glad you like it, then.” For just a second, Celestia’s ears fell and she looked really sad. “Long ago, I learned the risks of letting ponies with a great destiny stray from my side. As I said, destiny does not always take the form we expect, or that which we would prefer.”

She was quiet for a bit longer, and then was all smiles again. “But let us not linger on things long past. You will be living in the palace, both to make it easier for me to teach you, and so we can have some time together outside of our lessons. I do hope you can come to see me not just as your teacher, also as a friend. At least, as much as our stations will allow. If nothing else, I will need somepony to help me eat the rather large cake I’ve had my chefs preparing for a special occasion.”

“Neat!” For a second I forgot she was the princess and hugged her. Before I could get too scared about the fact that I probably wasn’t supposed to be hugging a princess, she hugged me back. Hugging Princess Celestia felt kinda weird, ‘cause she was so big. Plus she had wings, and I’d never hugged a pony with wings before. And she was really warm.

Princess Celestia pulled me a bit closer. “I'm looking forward to being your teacher, Sunset.”

I smiled up at her. “I'm gonna be the best student you’ve ever had! Promise!”

A Moment of Anger

I was four hours into my study session when somepony knocked on my door. I answered as any reasonable mare would. “Go away! I’m busy!”

I suppose there was a slim chance I was yelling at somepony I shouldn’t, but that wasn’t likely. Princess Celestia has a very distinctive knock, either because of those hoof-coverings she wears or just because ponies knocked differently a thousand years ago and old habits die hard. It also wasn’t one of the guards, either—she does send them to pick me up when she’s too busy to come for me herself, but they always identify themselves when they knock. Besides, they knock like guardponies: heavy and authoritative. If it wasn’t the princess or one of her guards, it probably wasn’t anypony important.

Instead of taking the hint, whoever it was knocked again. “Sunset? It’s me.”

I groaned, marked my place in my book and got up to answer the door. On the other side was a middle-aged mare dressed in the traditional white robes of an Archmagus. It was hard not to note rather critically that her red coat didn’t suit the robes, nor did her dark yellow-brown mane. I rather doubt she came here to get my opinions on her fashion sense, though. “Hello, Mother.”

“Sunset.” My mother stepped in, looking around the room. My quarters in the palace were very generous—being Princess Celestia’s protégé comes with some very nice perks. I had my own private tower; not an overly large one as far as the palace goes, but it was still an entire tower of the palace that was all mine.

The central room was my own private library, big enough to fit an entire house into it. My library was stocked with everything I needed to conduct my studies; whenever I needed new books I could just give a note to one of the guards, and within a few hours it would be delivered from the royal archives. Aside from lessons with Princess Celestia, I almost never needed to leave my quarters. And really, why would I ever want to leave? I had everything I needed to keep studying right here, which meant that everything out there was just a distraction.

Mother stood in my doorway, shifting on her hooves just outside my room. “Would you mind if I came in for a minute? There are some things we need to talk to you about.”

Joy. I just love having my incredibly important study time interrupted by ponies who want to talk. “Now’s not a good time, I’m in the middle of several very important projects for Princess Celestia. Maybe you could come back later?”

Instead of going away, Mother crossed the threshold into my tower. “If we don’t talk now, when would we? It’s been months since you came home for dinner—your father and I barely even see you anymore. It’s only a fifteen minute trot to our home. You could visit every once in a while.”

I clenched my teeth and bit down on the first couple things that popped into my head. After all, if I got snippy with Mother then word might get back to the princess. “As I said, Mother, I’ve been very busy with important work for Princess Celestia. I’m sure you understand all about being too busy working for the crown to have any time for family.”

I felt a small thrill of vindication at Mother’s flinch. She didn’t enjoy having the horseshoe on the other hoof. Her ears went flat, and her shoulders slumped down as her eyes dropped to floor. When she finally spoke, there was a sort of quiet resignation to her voice. “Sunset, I know your father and I weren’t always there for you. We were busy keeping Equestria safe—keeping you safe. I’d rather miss your birthday party than neglect my duties and have you or somepony else suffer for it.” She sighed and ran a hoof over her face. “I know it can be hard to understand that when you’re just a filly, but you’re an adult now. You should have a bit more perspective.”

“Perspective. Yeah, sure.” It’s easy to talk about having perspective when you’re not a five-year-old filly whose parents decided they had more important things to do than show up at your birthday party. That kinda thing sticks with you, and no amount of logic will make it go away. “So why are you here now? Other than to tell me how I shouldn’t be annoyed at you for being a terrible mother.”

Her eyes narrowed. “Excuse me for devoting my life to protecting Equestria. The lamia running around in the undermountain had already taken more than a dozen children when I captured it. The next one could have been you. Part of being an adult is prioritizing—”

“And I was never a priority for you,” I finished for her. “Since I became her student, Princess Celestia’s been there for every single birthday, holiday, everything. She’s the ruler of Equestria, but she always made time for me. Yet somehow you and Father had too many responsibilities.”

“That wasn’t what I—” Mother cut herself off with a frustrated groan. “Sunset, I didn’t come here to argue with you. I came here because...” She trailed off rubbing her temple with a hoof. “I ... look, Sunset, I know things aren’t right between us. They haven’t been for a long time. But, well, I managed to clear my schedule for a while, and tomorrow is Mother’s Day, so I was thinking maybe we could...”

“Oh, you have got to be kidding me.” I stalked up and jabbed her in the chest. “You think you can ignore me for most of my life, then just waltz in and ask me to be a good little daughter for Mother’s Day? Did you expect me to start tripping over myself in gratitude because you finally decided to be a proper mother for the first time in your life? Sorry, but I—how did you put it? Right: I have to prioritize. I have a lot of studying to do for Princess Celestia, and that takes precedence over ... whatever the hay it is you think is gonna happen here.”

“Sunset, I...” Mother turned her head, looking away and to the side. “I’m sorry, Sunset. I’m sorry I wasn’t there when you wanted me to be. I wish I could’ve been, but...”

“I get it.” I threw a little bit of spite in my next sentence. “Being a good magus was more important to you than being a good mother.” I spared an annoyed glower at her archmagus robes. “Guess it all worked out the way you wanted it to, didn’t it? You got a big fancy promotion, and the Princess took me off your hooves so you can focus on your career. So congratulations.”

Mother didn’t say anything for a long time. She just stared at me, like she was trying to think of something, anything she could say. Not that there was any point—we were way past the point where anything she could say would just magically fix everything. When she finally said something, the words practically spilled out of her mouth. “I love you, Sunset. I know I wasn’t the mother you wanted, or the one you deserved, but I tried to do my best.”

“You tried to do you best?” I shot right back. “Pity it wasn’t good enough.”

Mother answered that with an irritated growl. “Dammit, Sunset, I’m trying to fix this! What do you want from me?”

That was an easy question to answer. “Nothing. No wait, actually, there is one thing.” I pointed at the door. “Get out, so I can get back to studying.”

She stared at me and slowly shook her head. She stepped through the threshold, but turned back to say a few final words. “I ... I’m sorry. I know it’s not good enough, but I’m sorry.”

She was right. It wasn’t good enough.

I went looking for Princess Celestia the next day. We met pretty regularly for lessons, and so I could update her on my studies whenever she wasn’t occupied with affairs of state. Not that our relationship was all business—I could just walk up to her and start talking about whatever I wanted. It was one of the perks of being her personal student. One of many; it’s surprising just how much nicer everypony acted once they found out who I was. Ponies would do favors for me or even give me things just because I was Celestia’s student. Not that I really cared about most of that—ponies fawning all over me usually just got in the way of important stuff like studying—but it was nice to have a few sycophants hanging about, ready to do whatever I told them to.

None of them mattered right now, though. I was headed straight for the throne room and didn’t have any time to waste on those frivolous ponies and their frivolous things. Well, that’s not entirely true—I had stopped by the kitchens to pick something up from the chefs. I got along pretty well with them, so they were more than happy to do me the occasional favor. Early on in my apprenticeship, Princess Celestia sent me to help with the cooking as a way to teach me fine control with my pyromancy. Considering how important it was to keep the temperature of everything just right while you were cooking, it made for good practice. I’d eventually gotten good enough that the chefs were disappointed when Celestia decided I’d mastered the lesson and had me move on to other things.

Thankfully, the princess wasn’t too busy. Well, she’s always busy, that’s part of being a princess, but right now she was just going over a lot of paperwork. Paperwork’s still important, but it’s something she can do while also spending time with me. Plus, it meant that other than her guards and secretary, we pretty much had the throne room to ourselves. Not many ponies want to sit around and watch Celestia read and sign off on a seemingly endless stack of reports. Most of it was just routine stuff—putting her seal on budget reports or updates on some project or another.

She looked up from her stack of paperwork when she heard somepony come in through the throne room’s massively oversized doors, and when she saw it was me she smiled. “Sunset, always a pleasure to see you. I hope you’ve been doing well.”

“Princess.” I stopped in front of the throne and gave a quick bow. Celestia didn’t expect me to worry about that kind of formal protocol unless we were at some kind of big public event. We were close enough to be past bowing and scraping, but the guards got moody if I didn’t go through all the formalities. “I hope I’m not interrupting anything.”

“Not at all.” She picked up another folder from the stack and started scanning the documents within. “Assuming you don’t mind my attention being a little divided.”

“Actually, I was hoping I could talk to you in private for a bit.” My eyes turned to the giant stack of folders her secretary had waiting for her. “When you can spare the time, of course.”

Celestia spent a couple seconds focusing on the paperwork before she answered me. “Well, I have been meaning to spend some time with you...”

Her secretary cleared his throat, which made the stallion’s rather ridiculously huge mustache quiver. “We do have a very busy schedule for today, Your Highness. In addition to the usual concerns, you will be making several public appearances for the holiday; you’ll be making a lunch appearance with the Equestrian League of Mothers, and then there’s your usual holiday speech for the afternoon, as well as a few special appearances in court to present medals to a few exemplary mothers we’ve selected for the occasion.”

“Yes, of course.” Celestia frowned and tapped a hoof on her chin, then grinned at me. “That being the case, I’ll need to free up a little time for Sunset.” Without even taking her eyes off the report she was going over, she levitated about a quarter of her paperwork over to me. “Hop to it, Sunset. The quicker we finish, the more time we’ll have before duty calls.”

Naturally, her secretary’s mustache began quivering madly at this latest affront. “Your Highness, this is most irregular! You can’t just have your apprentice sign official legal documents!”

“Oh relax, Pigeon Hole.” Princess grinned and winked at me. “She’ll just be reading everything over for me before I sign, and I didn’t give her anything critical. I have the utmost faith in her ability to read over the Solar Guard’s incident report about a case of public intoxication in the gardens or pay rates for a few members of the palace staff without causing any problems.” A hint of a teasing smirk crossed her lips. “Besides, one of the nice things about being a princess is that I can do whatever I want.”

I grinned up at the princess, then got to work on the forms she’d trusted me with. I won’t deny being a bit amazed at just how much she trusted me—she was letting me help her run Equestria now. Even if it was just little stuff that didn’t really matter in the grand scheme of things, it was still important enough for Princess Celestia to deal with herself. Except now it wasn’t Princess Celestia doing it, it was me.

True to what the Princess had said, everything she’d delegated to me looked pretty straightforward. It was just a lot of stuff that she’d delegated out to her ministers, officials, and everypony else working for her, and now they needed her official approval on their solutions. A lot of it was probably unnecessary, but it had started out as one of Grand Vizier Sunbeam Sparkle’s reforms to centralize the government back when Princess Celestia had less direct power than she does now. Even though Princess Celestia almost always approved whatever her subordinates did, the fact that their decisions had to go through her meant she could keep an eye on things and make sure nopony did anything they shouldn’t.

I was making pretty good progress through it all, until I got to one report that stood out from the stack. “Uh, Princess, I think you gave me something you shouldn’t have. This report actually needs you to make a royal decree, not just sign off on something.”

“Oh?” She looked over at me, and I caught just a tiny hint of a smile tugging at the corner of her lips. I knew what that meant; being her student for as long as I had meant I’d learned to recognize the warning signs of when she was up to something. Sure enough, she didn’t just take the file from me and handle it herself. “Since you’ve already gone over everything, why don’t you tell me about the problem, and how you think it should be handled?”

That confirmed it, this was another one of her little tests. Princess Celestia would do those sometimes; just throw out a random question or problem, and see how I handled the situation. Whatever this test was, I wanted to get it right. “Well, the undersecretary to the treasurer thinks there’s something weird going on with Ponyville’s disaster relief budget because it’s way too high for a town of its size. So it could be a case of somepony skimming the money, the town’s padding its budget, or something weird is going on.”

Celestia waited patiently for me to continue, seeming quite content to let me puzzle it all out myself. “Ponyville ... never heard of it. I don’t think I can make a decision about a town I can't even find on a map.” I looked through the folder Celestia had given me, and sure enough there was a map of Equestria included. In fact, there was a lot more supplemental information in the folder than one would expect. Almost as if somepony wanted to make sure I had all the relevant information on hoof.

It took a while to actually find Ponyville on the map, but once I did a couple things fell into place. “It’s on the edge of the Everfree Forest? No wonder they have so much trouble.” I frowned and tapped a hoof on the map. “Really, the whole forest has been a problem for centuries. Something ought to be done about it. I don’t suppose we could just burn the whole thing to the ground?”

“I think that would be a bit needlessly destructive,” Princess Celestia answered. “While the Everfree is a problem, there are also a number of unique plants and animals that could be lost forever. Not to mention the ecological impact; destroying their natural habitat would scatter all the animals that live there across all of Equestria. I don’t suppose you’ve heard of Parasprites?”

“No,” I admitted.

“They’re native to the forest,” Celestia provided. “They’re extremely voracious eaters and prolific breeders. So long as they stay in the Everfree Forest, the local predators keep their population from exploding. But remove them from their native habitat, and...”

“They would breed out of control,” I finished for her. “And if the predators that eat them lose their normal food source, they’ll go looking for something else to replace it.” I grumbled and shook my head. “I guess if there was a quick-and-easy solution, somepony would’ve done it by now. In any case, it’s still a problem right now, so Ponyville needs the extra money. Though I’d suggest having somepony look into a long-term solution to the problem. It would save us money on Ponyville, and would probably also encourage the town to grow more. A bigger town means more ponies paying taxes, which is always good for the budget.”

Celestia was quiet for just long enough to make me nervous, then smiled and nodded. “I think that’s a fine solution, Sunset.” She pulled out some parchment and wrote out a quick letter containing her instructions. “Since you helped me so much, why don’t you co-sign it with me?”

My ears perked up at the offer, and I wasted no time adding my signature below her own. “Thank you, Princess Celestia.” I’m pretty sure getting to sign an official royal letter alongside Celestia meant I had passed the test.

Princess Celestia took the letter, sealed it, and then tucked it into the folder before moving it over to the completed pile. Then she shot me a conspiratorial little grin. “Since you handled that so well, perhaps I can see how you handle a few more issues?” She spared a glance for her secretary. “Don’t worry, Pigeon Hole, I won’t give her the keys to Royal Treasury, and I’ll check over everything she decides. Just consider this an extension of my usual lessons for her. I’m multi-tasking and using my time more efficiently—surely you approve?”

“Of course, Your Highness.” It’s not like he could have said anything else.

With that settled, I got to work on deciding whether the Royal Gardens should add more rosebushes, or diversify and add some gardenias to the mix.

Celestia and I finished her paperwork a bit over half an hour early. More than enough for us to squeeze in some private time before the next engagement on her social calendar. A princess’ duties are never done; that’s why I appreciated every single moment she could spare for me.

The two of us had gone to her royal quarters like we always did when we wanted some time alone. It was one of the only places where we could have complete privacy. The Princess’ royal quarters aren’t what most ponies would expect from the ruler of Equestria—sure, they were as huge and fancy as you would expect, but it was the understated kind of fanciness. Come to think of it, they were a lot like my room in that way. Things were nice, but there was none of the ostentatious and pointless luxury that was so popular in a lot of Canterlot. Princess Celestia didn’t need to slap gold and gems all over the place to show off how rich and powerful she was. After all, everypony already knew she was Princess Celestia.

She led the way over to some cushions the servants must have set up for us and settled down, motioning with a wing for me to take a seat next to her. I scooted my cushion a bit closer to her before I sat down. Once we were both comfortable, she turned to me with a smile. “Now then, Sunset, what was it you wanted to talk to me about? It must have been important if you were willing to spend an hour helping me with paperwork. I wasn’t expecting to see you at all today; I thought you would be with your mother. I know Scarlet was working hard to clear her schedule for today.”

Oh. Well this conversation was already starting off on the wrong hoof. I wouldn’t lie to her about what had happened, but I didn’t want my time with her to turn into a big conversation about my problems with Mother. I had plans for today, and they included something a lot better than whining about my problems with Mother. “She came by yesterday to try and arrange something. It didn’t work out.”

“Oh. I’m sorry to hear that.” She turned to meet my eyes. “I know things have been difficult for the two of you, and I was hoping this would be a chance for the two of you to make amends.” She slowly reached out and put a hoof on my shoulder. “Cherish your family, Sunset. I know it seems like they‘ll always be a part of your life, but you would be surprised how swiftly they can vanish.” Her head dipped towards the floor, and she let out a soft sigh. “Don’t spend the rest of your life regretting all the things you’ll never have a chance to tell them.”

“Princess?” I scooted a bit closer, so that I was practically up against her side. Something was obviously bothering her, and I wanted to help. “Are you thinking about your mother?” I didn’t really know anything about Princess Celestia’s parents. Nopony did. I suspected they might have been quietly removed from the history books to make Celestia seem more like she was above ponykind. It’s hard to keep the mystique of being an immortal goddess-princess when ponies can read about your mother putting you in time-out for raiding the cookie jar.

Celestia shook her head. “Not my mother, my sister. Luna and I ... had a disagreement, shortly before her madness. Both of us said things we shouldn’t have. You know how it is when family quarrels, we both knew exactly what to say to hurt one another. We never really had a chance to make things right before...” She trailed off, but I could fill in the rest of it. “Don’t have any regrets about your own family, Sunset. Even if you don’t get along with your parents, they still love you very much.”

“Right.” Celestia frowned at my brief answer, so I expanded on it. “I’ll think about it, Princess. It’s just ... it’s complicated.”

Celestia answered that with a soft, half-mournful chuckle. “Family always is.”

“Yeah, I guess.” I really didn’t want to talk about it anymore. Actually, I’d never wanted to talk about it in the first place. The last time I’d tried talking to Celestia about everything going on with my parents, it got all confusing. She made me question a few things I’d taken for granted about how things had gone. Normally I don’t mind being challenged intellectually—a bit of healthy debate makes your ideas stronger in the end—but when it came to my parents, and how they hadn’t been there for me...

Ugh, still thinking about them, when that was the last thing I wanted on my mind right now. Time for a quick change of subject, and I had just the thing to arrange it. Saddlebags normally weren’t the best place to store any food that didn’t react well to being jostled around, but there were spells to deal with that. I pulled to the box out and offered it to her. “Um, I got something for you. Because ... well, you know, it’s a special day and all.”

“Oh?” The Princess took the box from me and opened it up. Inside was a relatively small cake, about enough for two ponies to finish in a single sitting. Strawberry-and-cream icing, which I knew for a fact was Celestia’s favorite. I’d also added a quick personal touch, writing a message in the icing. ‘Happy Mother’s Day, Princess Celestia.’

Celestia looked down at the cake for a while, reading the message. “That looks absolutely lovely. Thank you very much, Sunset.” She slowly closed the box and passed it back to me. “I’m afraid I can’t accept it, though.”

My jaw dropped. “What? Why not?”

She sighed, and her voice shifted to that patient, lecturing tone she always used when she needed to explain a lesson I was having a hard time with. “Sunset, it’s bad enough that you’re spending Mother’s Day avoiding your real mother, but now you’re spending time with and giving gifts to me as well. It could be taken the wrong way, and your mother might be very hurt if she found out under the wrong circumstances.”

“Oh.” I slumped down on the cushion, briefly wishing that it could swallow me up. Celestia was trying to be nice and understanding about it, but that just made it worse.

The truth was, I’d meant it exactly that way. Ever since I’d become her student, Celestia was always there for me and always supported me when I needed somepony. When I had a hard time getting to bed on my first night in the castle because everything was so new and scary, she’d known somehow and let me spend the night with her, eating cake, talking, and just being amazing. Every time I did well on a test or mastered some new lesson, she was there to congratulate me. Whenever I needed somepony to give me advice or help with a problem, she was there for me.

In short, she’d been ten times as good of a mother to me as my biological one. If anypony deserved my love and affection on Mother’s Day, it was her. If that hurt my mother’s feelings, then maybe she should’ve done a better job. After all, the whole reason Celestia had been able to take up the role in the first place was that it was vacant until she showed up.

I guess it was stupid of me to think I could actually make things ... well not official exactly, but a bit less unofficial, I suppose. It’s not like I was expecting her to adopt me—though I’ll admit to having a couple dreams where she did, or even revealed she was secretly my real mother—but she could at least accept a Mother’s Day present.

Unless I’d misread things. Maybe I was just another student to her, and all the little gestures were just her being a good mentor. And like some pathetic, affection-starved little filly, I’d latched onto the first pony to actually treat me decently and read too much into things. I picked the cake up and dropped it back into my saddlebags. “Sorry, Princess. I was just ... I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have bothered you with this. I’ll just go study or something.”

I turned around and headed for the door, but only got a couple steps before Celestia called out to me. “Sunset, wait.” I stopped and turned around. Princess Celestia lifted the cake box out of my bags and offered one of her conspiratorial little grins. “I can’t accept a cake from you today, but tomorrow’s perfectly fine. I’ll even put it in a stasis spell to keep it fresh.” She did exactly that, setting it aside. “After all, it did look rather delicious, and I hate to see a perfectly good cake go to waste. As for the rest of the day, I had something rather special in mind. I’ve been meaning to make a few changes to your lesson plans, and now seems as good a time as any.”

“Changes? What kinds of changes?” Change could be either really good, or really bad, and more likely the latter. After all, I was pretty happy with how my life was right now. I had plenty of time to study in peace without anypony bothering me, and Princess Celestia always had some time for me. What if she had decided it was time for me to graduate? I might never see her again!

Celestia stepped forward and put a wing over my shoulder. “Well, after how much you helped me with that paperwork earlier today, I think I’d like to have you around more often. I’m sure a mare with your intelligence and drive will be an asset. Besides, you’ve been spending too much time cooped up in your tower—it will be good for you to go out more often. Make some friends and have a social life instead of just studying all the time. I think it’s time I taught you a few things you can’t learn from a book. The sort of lessons you can only learn at my side.”

I gasped as comprehension dawned. “You mean you want me to spend more time with you?”

“Yes, quite a bit more.” I could barely contain myself at the confirmation. Jumping and squealing would not be dignified, no matter how much I wanted to. “I want to have you at my side whenever I’m conducting official business. It will cut down on your study time, but I think you know enough about magic for the moment. Or at least the sort of magic you can study in a library.” She pulled me in a bit closer. “The magic inherent in things like love and friendship, on the other hoof, is a good deal more complicated. I look forward to teaching it to you.”

“I’m looking forward to learning.” To be honest, I wasn’t sure either of those types of magic even existed, but if Celestia said they did I would at least try to learn the material. Especially if it meant spending most of the day with her every single day. Obviously she’d only turned down the cake because she wanted to avoid a deliberate snubbing of my mother, but deep down she felt the same way that I did. This was the best Mother’s Day ever!

The next couple months were probably some of the happiest of my life. Instead of squeezing in a few lessons between engagements, Celestia and I got to spend all day together. And better than that, she introduced me to all the rich, powerful, and important ponies in Canterlot. She even took me to the Grand Galloping Gala and had me spend the whole night greeting ponies alongside her.

I still wasn’t sold on the idea that friendship was somehow magical, but I’d definitely made some useful allies and contacts from all the time I spent out in public with Celestia. Not friends. More like assets. I spent a couple minutes at a garden party chatting with a newspaper editor, and the next day’s story about the event made mention of what a sophisticated and charming young mare Princess Celestia’s protégé Sunset Shimmer was.

I never did get around to talking to Mother, but I think we both knew that was a lost cause. Besides, there was so much else I would rather be doing.

As wonderful as things were, the best was yet to come. Princess Celestia hadn’t said anything definite, but I was confident that I’d connected all the dots the right way. From the moment we’d met, she told me I had a special destiny. Now she was taking me with her to public events, showing me off and having me watch and learn as she ruled over Equestria. Sometimes she even asked for my opinion about whatever issue she was dealing with, just like she had with the tax thing in Ponyville.

I knew enough about history and politics to recognize what was going on. Back when Unicornia had been its own kingdom, the unicorn kings and queens would do the exact same thing whenever one of their heirs came of age. Show their heir around the kingdom so everypony got used to seeing the pony who would one day rule over them. Have that pony present for official royal business so they would learn how a monarch should act. Let them make decisions on smaller issues so one day they can handle the big ones.

The evidence was indisputable. And to think I’d been worried I might graduate one day and never see her again. Not likely, when she was obviously grooming me to become Princess Sunset Shimmer. Maybe even make me an alicorn, just like she was. I can’t think of anything I would love more than that.

I think other ponies had put it together, too. The guards had always been nice, but they were a bit more polite. Like they suspected that one day I might be giving them orders too. And of course, my inevitable cloud of sycophants and favor-seekers had expanded considerably thanks to my new public role. I still treated them with the contempt they deserved, other than when they were useful, but it was gratifying to have them around. Having socialites like Refined Palate and Upper Crust trying to win my favor was proof that I had become a very important pony.

Of course, I didn’t let all the socializing get in the way of what was really important. I might not spend as much time in my tower studying as I used to, but that just meant I had to study twice as hard in the time I did get. Expectations had been high enough when I was just the princess’ personal student. Now that I was a future alicorn-princess-in-training, I had to be better. I had to be the best at magic in all Equestria, other than Celestia. Anything else just wasn’t good enough.

My skills were more than up to the challenge. I was already well past the standards for entry into the magi. In fact, I could probably give one of the archmagi a tough fight. The prospect of testing that out was almost enough to talk to my parents again. Almost.

I suppose I should’ve realized everything was going a little bit too perfectly. Sometimes the universe has a nasty sense of humor, and likes to let a pony climb up high so they’ll fall further when they get knocked down. ‘Happily ever after’ only happens in those storybooks parents read to their children. Well, most parents.

It all started to go wrong when I stopped by the royal quarters to meet the princess at the start of the day, just like I’d done almost every single day for the last three months. Except this time when I walked up to the doors, the guards didn’t smile and open them for me. Instead they stayed right in position, looking grim and serious. “The princess has ordered that nopony is to enter her chambers.”

I was a bit annoyed, but there was no point in making a scene right in front of the princess over it. Besides, this was obviously just a miscommunication. “Nopony except me, you mean.”

“No ma’am,” the guardpony answered, his face carefully blank. “In fact, she left specific orders that you were not allowed to enter until she was ready for you.”

Okay, this was officially outside the realm of an understandable mistake. Something weird was going on here. Still, yelling at the guards wouldn’t accomplish anything. Given that I wasn’t supposed to enter until the princess was ‘ready’ for me, she was obviously setting something up for me. Maybe some kind of surprise present or something? I had been doing a pretty good job as her student, so some kind of reward would be quite appropriate. Maybe today was the day she was planning to make her obvious plans for my eventual ascension official?

I pulled up a book and tried to read while I waited, but it was hard to concentrate now that I had an idea what was waiting for me on the other side of those doors. It’s rather hard to focus on a bunch of dry academic text about multi-spectral prismatic wave energy when you’re minutes away from possibly becoming an alicorn princess.

It felt like I was waiting forever, but when I checked the time it had only been half an hour. Finally, the doors glowed with Celestia’s golden magic and cracked open. The guardpony cleared his throat just in case I’d missed it. “Ma’am, the princess is ready for you now.”

I nodded at the guard and slowly walked into Princess Celestia’s quarters. I don’t know what I’d been expecting to find. Probably a whole lot of complicated magical ritual implements—turning a unicorn into an alicorn was almost certainly a complicated process involving the type of magic that nopony except Princess Celestia could manage. A couple other ponies had tried to become alicorns behind her back in the distant past. It had not ended well for them.

But there weren’t any magical implements in the room, beyond the things Celestia normally kept. Everything looked exactly like it would’ve on an ordinary day. Princess Celestia herself was sitting on one of her cushions, waiting for me with that welcoming smile she always had for me.

What was different was that this time we weren’t alone. There was another mare in the room. At first I didn’t know why this strange pink unicorn was here, rubbing her forehead like her horn wasn’t on right. I’d never seen her before in my life, and after three months on the social circuit with Princess Celestia I knew everypony worth knowing in Canterlot. She looked like she was around my age, but I’d never seen her at the School for Gifted Unicorns back when I still took classes there. So who was this strange mare, and why was she here with the princess? Why was Celestia making me wait in the hallway while she talked to this new pony?

Then the new arrival shifted to the side, and things simultaneously became more and less clear. I’d been wrong before; she wasn’t a unicorn. She was an alicorn!

I tried to wrap my head around what I was seeing. “I ... princess, what’s going on here? Who is this mare, and why is she…?” I waved a hoof at her wings and horn.

Princess Celestia smiled and wrapped a wing around this strange new pony. “Something wonderful has happened. Sunset Shimmer, I would like you meet my niece, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza. Princess, this is my personal student, Sunset Shimmer.”

“Hello.” Cadenza rose up from her seat and walked up to me, offering a hoof. “It’s nice to meet you, Sunset. And my friends call me Cadance.”

Friends? Friends?! This nag came out of nowhere and been given everything I’d worked for years to earn. I studied my flank off—I’d been the princess’ personal student for almost a decade, and I’d worked hard every single day of it. Then this Cadenza pony shows up, and all of a sudden she’s not only an alicorn princess, but she also gets adopted by the Princess!

And now she had the gall to think we could be friends?! Not likely. Not likely at all.

I took the coward’s way out of dealing with Cadenza and and Celestia. I should’ve confronted them right then and there—called them out for treating me so unfairly, and for giving this new mare everything I’d ever wanted without her needing to earn one bit of it. I’d busted my flank for most of my life, but she got to just trot in from out of nowhere and have everything I’d paid for in blood, sweat, and tears handed to her on a silver platter. It wasn’t fair.

But I didn’t call them out on it. I think it was mostly because I was afraid of upsetting Celestia. Obviously I’d been a bit too optimistic about where things stood between us—if she was really preparing me for something as grand as becoming an alicorn princess, she wouldn’t have sprung this whole Cadenza situation on me. If she knew how I felt about her, what my dreams were for the future, and she really cared about me, then there was no way she would do something like this to me.

So yeah, I told myself that confronting her would just make things worse. If Celestia was already upset with me, the last thing I needed to do was start yelling at her. That could end with me getting kicked out of the palace and not being her student anymore. Or worse.

Instead of risking that, I just told them I wasn’t feeling well and went back to my tower. In hindsight, Celestia almost certainly knew what was really bothering me, but she let me leave anyway. She probably didn’t want my bad attitude ruining Cadenza’s special day. Still, a part of me wished that Celestia had asked me to stay, or come after me and asked what was wrong. It would’ve been nice to know she cared.

Since apparently she didn’t care, I went back to my tower and studied. I didn’t have any intention of leaving until Celestia came herself. Maybe it was a little immature, but after everything she’d put me through I deserved an in-person explanation and apology.

When somepony knocked on my door the next day, I was sure it was her. I was certain that Celestia had come to tell me how things weren’t as bad as I thought, and the elevation of this Cadenza pony wasn’t intended as an insult. After all, despite my fears, I knew in my heart that Celestia still cared for me. How could she not, when I cared so deeply for her?

But the pony knocking on the front door of my tower wasn’t Princess Celestia. In fact, it was the pony I least wanted to see out of anypony in Equestria. Even my parents would’ve been better than her.

I cracked my door open, and found myself facing the newly elevated Princess Mi Amore Cadenza. The smile I’d put on my face in the expectation of seeing Princess Celestia immediately vanished. “Oh. It's you.”

Cadenza answered me with a cheerful smile, seeming completely oblivious to the open hostility in my tone. “Hello, Sunset. I hope I’m not interrupting your studies, but I was wondering if I could talk to you for a bit. Is now a good time?”

Ugh. The bright and happy cheerleader act was just making her even more annoying than she had been before, and I hadn’t thought that was possible. My eyes narrowed, and my voice dropped down to a low, irritated growl. “What do you want, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza?”

Cadenza met my obvious irritation at her mere existence with a patient, understanding smile. “To talk. I heard you haven't been out of your tower for a bit, and I thought you could perhaps use a friend, or at least a pony to lend an ear.” She paused, and let out a soft chuckle. “And please, just call me Cadance. All my friends do. Honestly, it sounds really weird having anypony call me princess, let alone having them use my full name on top of that.”

Joy, she was one of those ponies who thought she could have anypony eating out of their hooves with just a few kind words and some generic nice friendliness. I wonder how many ponies had fallen for her act over the years? Well, I certainly wouldn’t be one of them. “If I needed a friend right now, it wouldn't be you.” I opened the door all the way and stepped forward, forcing her to take a half-step back. “That’s because we're not friends, Cadenza.”

Cadenza’s ears wilted at that, and her bright and sunny disposition faded away, replaced by a soft frown. “Sunset, please. You don't need to be so hostile. I want to help you, and even though I know you don’t like me right now, I really hope we can be friends one day.” She sighed, and stretched out a hoof towards me. “Look, let me in and we can talk for a bit. Maybe air some things that need to be said. I’m not sure what I did to upset you, but it’s obvious that something’s gone wrong, and I’d like to make it right if I can.”

Tempting as it was to just slam the door in her face, I decided to hear her out. After all, I’d been willing to give Celestia a chance to explain what was going on; maybe Cadenza could do the same. Besides, if she started pissing me off, it would probably fun to throw her out of my tower—preferably from the highest window, though that might be pointless when she had wings. “Fine. Come in.”

Cadenza answered me with another one of her annoyingly friendly smiles. It’s like she thought if she acted nice enough I’d just forget why I didn’t like her. “Thank you, Sunset.” She trotted in, looking around my library like she’d never seen one before. Which was actually pretty likely, since as far as I could tell she’d never been to Canterlot before yesterday. “You have a really nice place. I can see you're every bit the scholar Auntie said you were.”

Any points she might have earned from the obvious attempt at flattery instantly vanished when she just casually referred to Princess Celestia as ‘auntie.’ What gave her the right to do that? She’d only been adopted yesterday! Still, I probably needed to make some effort to at least try to manage a thin veneer of politeness. Otherwise her ‘auntie’ might be unhappy with me. “Thanks, Cadenza.”

Cadenza’s smile slipped for a fraction of a second, presumably because of how obviously forced my words were. Faking politeness was a lot easier than faking sincerity. Despite that, she pressed on in trying to make friends with me. “I heard you were really good with magic. Well, ‘prodigy’ is the word I've heard thrown around.”

Joy, more obvious attempts at flattery. “What's your point?”

Cadenza briefly broke eye contact with me, took a deep breath, and when she met my eyes again she was unleashing more of that forced friendliness. I suppose she deserves some credit for being so stubbornly persistent about trying to win me over. “I could use some help with learning unicorn magic.” She tapped a hoof against her horn. “I was a pegasus before, so I'm still getting used to having this.” She let out a self-deprecating chuckle. “I would like to get to know you a bit better, so I was hoping you could give me a few pointers.”

Seriously? Princess Celestia made this mare a princess when she didn’t know the first thing about how to cast a spell? I snorted and tossed my head. “I suppose I can see why you’d want to learn. A princess who can't do magic would be an utter embarrassment.”

Cadenza’s teeth clenched, turning her smile into something else for a moment. She shook it off pretty quickly, though. “Which is why I'm trying to learn as quickly as possible. As a princess, I’ll be expected to use my magic for the good of all Equestria, so it's my duty to learn how to actually use it.”

“So you want me to help cover your plot before everypony finds out,” I concluded. Since she seemed determined to remain all niceness and smiles no matter what, I shot a mocking smile right back at her. “I know this is probably a really crazy idea, but maybe you should've learned what you were doing before you became a princess.”

That finally took that annoying fake smile off her face, replacing it with a frown. She opened her mouth to say something, but caught herself before any words came out. Then she closed her eyes for a few moments, and when she opened them answered me, her voice dripping with forced patience. “Now, Sunset, I understand you’re a bit upset with me—though I’m not sure what I’ve done to make you angry, considering we never even met before yesterday. I'm trying to do the best I can with the cards I've been dealt. Not everypony is lucky enough to have all the opportunities you have. I would’ve loved to have years as Aunt Celestia’s student to learn everything I might need to know before I became a princess, but things didn’t work out that way.”

Oh, so she thought the only reason I was Princess Celestia’s student was because of luck? Not that I’d earned it by working my plot off every day to be the best damn student in Equestria. Not that I had a special destiny that I deserved after all the effort I’d put into working towards it. No, I was just lucky. And now she wanted to throw a pity party for herself on top of that? “If you're expecting me to feel sorry for you, because it's so hard being given everything on a silver platter, when other ponies have worked their plots off for years to earn them...”

“It's not like that.” Cadenza groaned and rubbed her temple. “I wasn’t asking you to feel sorry for me, I just wanted to explain why I wasn’t as prepared as you are.” She ran a hoof over her face, but two thirds of the way down her hoof paused, and her eyes widened. “What other ponies have worked for ... oh.” She stepped forward and put a hoof on my shoulder. “I think I understand why you’re so upset now. Sunset, you haven't lost anything just because I’m a princess. You're still very important to Aunt Celestia. If you heard her voice when she was telling me about you, how unbelievably proud she is of you...” She gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze. “Me being here and being a princess doesn’t mean Aunt Celestia’s stopped caring about you. Nothing has changed.”

“Of course it has.” I brushed her hoof off and took a step back to keep her from trying again. “You think having a new princess around and being Celestia’s niece doesn’t change anything? Please.”

Cadenza answered that with a long-suffering sigh. “Okay, fine, some things have changed. I’ll admit that she’s probably going to have less time for you because she needs to help teach me how to be a princess. But aside from the changes to her schedule, nothing about you and her has changed. I'm not some kind of replacement for you, if that's what you're worried about. I’m not trying to take her away from you—I don’t think I could. And Aunt Celestia still has big plans for you.”

That all sounded nice, but only on the surface. Once you dug a little deeper and read between the lines, it was obvious that Cadenza was just tossing out a whole lot of empty platitudes. Nothing she said really made any difference. She was still here, and her mere existence was an insult. “Yeah, I’m sure she has big plans. After all, apparently it's my job to tutor you now.”

One of Cadenza’s ears flicked. “No, that’s not your job. You can’t seriously think Aunt Celestia put so much time and effort and into training you just so you could be my tutor. I was hoping you would be willing to teach me as a friend. If you don't want to, then I'm sure other arrangements can be made. I just thought it would be a good way to get to know you.”

“Why?” I demanded.

“Because you sound like a very talented mare,” Cadenza answered, “but one that could use a few more friends in her life. I know Aunt Celestia thinks so; I’m pretty sure she wants us to be friends. There is so much more to life than books, studying, and trying to prove to everypony that you deserve to be Aunt Celestia’s protégé. I know she’s been trying to help you get out more, but there are only so many things Aunt Celestia can do with you when she’s also your teacher and busy running Equestria.”

She put her fake friendly smile back on. “I think I can help you in ways she can’t. I know I might technically outrank you in the eyes of Canterlot society, but I have no intention of treating you that way. I want you to see me as your peer, your equal, and your friend.” She waved a wing towards one of the windows that showed the rest of Canterlot below. “There is so much more out there you could experience, and I would love to show you those things. We could go to the theater, someplace for dinner, or the opera house. We could study together if you’d like, or even go to West Hoof and ogle the cadets while they’re exercising. Whatever you want.” She offered her hoof to me. “Sunset Shimmer, will you accept my friendship?”

I’ll admit, that sounded nice. I almost shook her hoof. As much as I enjoyed working hard and earning my place at Celestia’s side, there were times when it got ... well, a bit lonely. Other than Celestia herself, there wasn’t really anypony I could talk to. My parents were out, and all the other ponies my age just didn’t understand. There’s nothing more annoying than trying to talk to somepony and seeing the gears turning in their mind as they tried to find some way to relate to things that were completely outside their realm of experience. But Cadenza might be an exception. After all, she was effectively Celestia’s student as well. She would be going through most of the same things I would, so she might actually know how I felt. Having somepony like that did sound rather nice. In fact, it sounded...

Too good to be true. “Okay, what's your angle? What are you trying to pull?”

Cadenza blinked in surprise, and a faintly confused frown crossed her face. “Sunset, I don't have an angle, and I’m not trying to pull anything. That's not how I do things. I am not trying to manipulate you. I'm being completely honest when I say I want us to be friends get along. I can see you're upset, and even though I think your fears are unfounded, I can understand why you’re afraid. That’s why I want to do whatever I can to make you feel better.”

More horseapples, but I wasn’t going to fall for it.“You want to make me feel better?” I glared at her. “Fine. Then go away. Hoof your crown back Celestia, get rid of your horn, and go so far away that I'll never have to see you again. That would make me feel much better.”

Cadenza frowned at me, her patience obviously wearing thin. “We both know that isn't going to happen, Sunset. I know it’s hard to adjust to sharing Aunt Celestia with a new pony, especially so unexpectedly, and I’m willing to work with you to help you adjust, but it is something you’re going to have to deal with. You're mature enough to know better than to act like this.”

Oh, that did it! All the false charm had been bad enough, but now she was going to start outright insulting me by implying that I was immature? No way I was putting up with that. My horn lit up with an angry flare, and I took a threatening step towards her. “You come into my tower and insult me? I'll give you one chance to reconsider what you just said.”

Cadenza took an instinctive step back, holding up one hoof defensively. “Sunset, please, calm down and think about what you're doing. I'm not your enemy—I’m trying to be your friend!”

“Sure you are.” I stalked forward, idly taking note of the ambient temperature in the room and thinking about how easily I could shift it around to make her life very unpleasant. “You barge into the palace out of nowhere, steal everything I've worked for years to earn, and then try to say that you're not my enemy?” I snorted at the sheer ridiculousness of it. “If you don’t think that makes us enemies, then you don’t even know what the word means.”

“What?” She was still backing away from me, and her eyes briefly shot towards the door, like she was calculating her chances of getting there. “Sunset, You’re not making any sense! I haven't done anything like that!”

“The hay you haven't,” I growled.

Cadenza ran out of space to back away as her rump ran into a bookshelf. “Sunset, you're scaring me right now. Please, stop and think about what you’re saying. I don’t want you to do something you’ll regret later.”

Oh, there were all kinds of things I could do to this Cadenza nag without a moment of regret. “Fine. Then get out. Out of my tower, out of Canterlot—hay, out of Equestria entirely!”

Cadenza slumped, half in resignation and half in relief. “Alright, fine, I'll leave your home. I'm sorry we couldn't work this out. If you want to talk later, you can visit whenever you want. Even after how badly this went, I’m still willing to give you a chance to be my friend. I don’t think you’re a bad pony, you’re just in a bad place right now, and you need somepony to help you out of it.” She turned and started heading for the exit.

Something about how self-righteous she sounded when she said that made me want to get one last parting shot in. Maybe crack her goodie-four-shoes act and prove that she wasn’t all sweetness and light after all. “I have one question for you, Princess.” She halted her progress towards the door. “What did you do to deserve anything you've been given?”

She turned back to face me. The friendly smile was gone, but in its place was something ... well, the best way I can think to put it is that it reminded me of the way Celestia would look, sometimes. Serious, and almost kind of unfocused, like she was seeing a lot more than just what was in front of her. “I earned my ascension by helping ponies find love and happiness. Not because I was expecting anything in return, but just because I wanted to help them.”

“Really? That’s it? Love and happiness?” I don’t think I could’ve come up with a more ridiculous excuse for making somepony a princess if I was trying. What did ‘helping ponies find love’ even mean? And what did it have to do with being a good princess? “So, how did you help ponies find love? Did you go around town lifting your tail for anypony willing?”

Cadenza’s eyes narrowed, and I could hear her teeth grinding. Apparently I had finally found a weak spot. “No, I helped them find ponies that made them happy. Ponies that completed them.”

I smirked and followed it up. “Oh, so the tail-tossing was just purely for your own pleasure?”

“I did nothing of the sort,” Cadenza growled. “Though frankly, what I do or don’t do with my personal life is none of your business. You should know better than to say things like that; I can't imagine Auntie ever taught you to act like this.”

There was that ‘Auntie’ again. It was so familiar and comfortable, as if they’d known each other for years. It pissed me off like nothing else, hearing her talk about Celestia that way. That kind of familiarity should be earned, and Cadenza hadn’t earned it. I was so infuriated that I just cut loose on her, screaming at the top of lungs. “What the hay would know about me and Celestia anyway? You don’t know anything! You didn't even know her before yesterday, and you sure as hay don’t deserve to call her your aunt! You're nothing! Nopony! I'm the one who's been by her side for years! If anypony should’ve been adopted by her it’s me! She’s been like a mother to me for years—hay, she is my mother in everything but blood! You can’t take that away from me! I won’t let you!” By the time I was done shouting I was panting and gasping for breath.

Cadenza let out a loud, frustrated groan. “Listen, Sunset, for the last time, I am not here to replace you. I’m not trying to steal Celestia’s love from you, and even if I wanted to I couldn’t. That’s not how love works.” She let out an annoyed sigh, and turned for the door again. “I think it’s past time I left. You clearly aren't in any mood to listen to me, and I’m tired of trying to be the better mare while you keep hurling out insults.” She stomped over to the door, pausing to let out a frustrated grumble as she vainly tried to use her magic to open it.

That would’ve been the end of it, if she’d just left. However, once she finally managed to open the door she let out a huff and tossed out a parting shot. “You know, if you’re that upset about not being a princess yet, maybe instead of blaming me you should take a look at your own behavior. If you did, you might realize that it's pretty obvious to see that your bad attitude is why you aren't ready for it.”

All the anger I’d been—well not exactly suppressing, but at least keeping a bit of a lid on—exploded when I heard that. How dare she tell I didn’t deserve to be a princess! “Oh, that is it, you nag!” I snarled. Fire burst out of my horn, heading straight for her.

Cadenza’s eyes widened in shock, and she tried to throw up something that almost bore a passing resemblance to a defensive shield. Alicorn or not, she obviously had no clue how to use magic. Her shield wouldn’t have stopped a stiff breeze, let alone a fire spell from a pony with all my experience and training. I’d learned to conjure flames from Celestia herself; it would take more than a little blue mist to stop me.

My fire blast tore straight through Cadenza’s pitiful attempt at defense. She throw up a foreleg in a vain attempt to ward it off, but that just gave the flames somewhere to start. The nag screamed in pain when my attack struck, and a moment later the stench of burning fur hit my nostrils.

For a brief moment, it was very satisfying watching her moan and clutch her burned limb to chest. Then the smell of burned flesh joined that of her fur, and I took a closer look at the injury. I’d only intended to singe her a bit, give her the equivalent of a nasty sunburn. But the injuries I saw were worse than that. Her coat had been burned away to reveal skin that glistened like plastic, and bulged into a deep, mottled pink that burst and bled where she’d gotten the worst of it..

“No.” I hadn’t meant to hurt her. Well okay, I wanted to hurt her, but not hurt her. This was bad, she was going to need a doctor. There might be scars from it. I stared at the injury, and words spilling out of my mouth as I tried to make sense of it. “I—um—I—I didn’t mean to...” My brain woke up from the shock long enough for me to pull out my first aid kit; like any prudent pyromancer, I kept it stocked with everything needed to treat burns.

“Horseapples, Cadenza, I—I'm...” I knew I should apologize, but for some reason I couldn’t bring myself to actually say the words. Instead I just opened up my first aid kit, and started walking over to treat her.

As soon as I tried to approach her, Cadenza shrieked and scrambled away from me as fast she could with three working legs. “Get away from me you monster!” She let out an unfocused wave of magic that knocked me onto my rump and shattered every window in the tower. Cadenza promptly fell back on the pegasus instincts she’d been born with, flying out of one of the opened windows as fast her wings could carry her.

I just sat there and watched her leave, trying to figure out how things could’ve gone so horribly wrong.

A Moment of Regret

I don’t know how long I just sat there, waiting in my tower. I thought about running, but I doubted that would’ve done any good. The teleportation spell Celestia had taught me would let me get out of the palace, but that was only the first step. Even if I could manage to hide from whatever divination magic Celestia used to try and follow me, she had the resources of all of Equestria at her disposal. I didn’t like my odds of getting away from the entire Royal Guard, the Equestrian Intelligence Service, the Magi Corps, and whoever else she could send out looking for me.

Besides, even if I could’ve gotten away, I wanted to face her. I wanted to hear what she had to say for herself, and there were things I wanted to say to her. Even if it ended with her casting me out as her student, I’d rather look her in the eye than run away.

I had just finished halfheartedly poking at my dinner when heavy armored hooves started pounding on my door. I opened it up and found myself face-to-face with two of the larger, more intimidating members of the Solar Guard—Celestia’s personal bodyguard unit. The senior of the two turned to me, his voice all business and devoid of the respect I’d become accustomed to. “Sunset Shimmer. Princess Celestia requires your presence. At once.”

My throat was so dry from nerves it took a couple tries before I could manage a proper response. “Yeah. Okay, I’m coming.” As I stepped out the two guards fell into place alongside me. On any other day it would’ve felt like an honor guard, but on that day it felt more like I was a prisoner being escorted to the gallows.

I was a bit surprised when they led me towards the throne room instead of Celestia’s personal quarters. That didn’t bode well for me; if she was using the throne room for a personal meeting, then she was almost certainly planning to lay down the law.

I slowly trudged forward into the throne room, intently studying the carpet at my hooves. Once we reached the steps of the throne, I came to a halt. After a few seconds the guards turned about, leaving me alone with the princess.

Once it was clear Celestia wasn’t going to say anything, I dug up enough courage to stop staring at my hooves and actually meet her eyes. Celestia was perched on her throne, glowering down at me with open disapproval. I shrank down against the carpet, but there was no escaping her now. It was all I could do not to break down sobbing and beg for forgiveness right then and there. “Sunset Shimmer, do you know why I have summoned you?”

I shuffled my hooves like a filly who’d been caught stealing from the cookie jar. “Yeah.”

Her scowl deepened. “Would you kindly tell me what you did?”

My voice came out as a small, ashamed mumble. “I burned Cadenza.”

Unsurprisingly, Princess Celestia didn’t find my barely-audible murmured confession satisfactory. “I cannot hear you. Louder.”

I spoke up. “I burned Cadenza.”

Celestia gave a slight nod to show that I’d at least managed an acceptable volume, though there was a long way left to go before I was out of the doghouse. “Yes, you did. Do you know how painful it is to suffer a burn wound, my student? A real one, like the one you gave Cadance?”

“Kinda,” I lamely offered. “I mean, I've burned myself a couple times, while I was practicing my magic. Never as bad as she got hurt, but...” I trailed off, realizing how utterly inadequate my own excuses sounded. I tried to think of something else to say, and the words spilled out of the mouth. “I didn't mean to hurt her! Well, I did, but I didn’t mean to hurt her that much! It was accident! I just got really mad and—”

Celestia cut me off before I could get any further. “An accident is when you're practicing a spell, and something unintended happens. What happened earlier today was no accident. You attacked Cadance. She offered you her hoof in friendship, and you answered her by burning that hoof.” Her tone hardened, and the glare she directed down at me intensified. “You used the very magic I taught you to launch an unprovoked attack on an innocent pony! I am appalled and utterly ashamed of the use you put my training to. I cannot imagine anything from our time together that would have made you think it was appropriate to attack another pony for any reason other than to defend yourself or another.”

I slunk down lower, until my belly was practically brushing the carpet. “I didn’t use my magic the way you taught me to.”

“Precisely,” she agreed, not letting up one iota with her condemning glower from atop her throne. “Please, explain why you thought it was acceptable to make an unprovoked attack against an innocent pony, in direct contradiction of everything I have ever taught you.”

“I lost my temper,” I admitted. “She said I didn’t deserve to be a princess and I just ... snapped.”

“Does that make your actions acceptable, then?” Celestia demanded. “Should I overlook everything you’ve done just because you lost your temper? Cadance will carry the scars from your attack for the rest of her life. Her coat will grow back over the scars on her body, but that’s not all that you hurt. She might be the same age as you, but she her heart is still innocent. You stole that innocence away from her. Her leg will heal, but a wound to the heart is a far more difficult thing to predict.”

I was starting to wish I’d decided differently on the whole running away thing. I’d wanted to face Celestia, but the more I listened to her, the worse I felt about everything that had happened. It sounded like Celestia hated me now, like I’d become some kind of complete monster. I’d made a bad decision, but that didn’t mean I was a bad pony, right?

A bit of the harshness left Celestia’s voice, replaced with quiet disappointment that hurt just as much. “Sunset, you are a pony with incredible magical talents. Perhaps you should think about what it would be like for other ponies to be around a pony who may injure them, severely, simply because you ‘lost your temper’? Think what might have happened if your spell had struck Cadance in the face instead of one of her legs.” I winced as I imagined the potential damage in vivid detail. “It’s the same reason ponies with your level of talent aren’t allowed to drink to excess: having power comes with an attendant duty to use that power responsibly. I’m sure I don’t need to explain just how much pain and suffering you could cause if you continue to use your pyromancy so recklessly.”

She slowly stepped down from her throne, approaching me. “I made you my student so that you could learn to fulfill your potential. Because I hoped that one day you would be able to take what I taught you to help the ponies around you, to make their lives better. You have the ability to do so, but you need to show wisdom in how you use your power and abilities. For all that you know about how to use magic, you still haven’t learned why.”

By this point I felt utterly miserable, so I said the only thing I could think of that might fix it. “I'm sorry, Princess Celestia. For misusing everything you taught me. For hurting Cadenza. Everything.”

Celestia finished coming down the stairs from her throne, standing directly before me. Then she extended a hoof and helped me back up to a proper standing position. “Apologizing to me is only the first step, my student. One on a long path we're going to have to take.”

I bit of the tension left my body at her choice of words. I still asked for confirmation, though. “I'm still your student, right? You're not gonna throw me out?”

Princess Celestia shook her head and offered me a small reassuring smile. “Of course not. You have made a mistake; all ponies do, and I do not give up on my little ponies because they made a single mistake. If I did, I would have given up on all of ponykind.” I let out a relieved sigh, but that was when the other horseshoe dropped. Celestia’s smile vanished, and her voice went from gentle and understanding to firm and authoritative. “Though let me make it very clear that you are going to need to make amends for your actions. I will forgive you, but you must face the consequences of what you have done. I expect you to start by apologizing to Cadance.”

I answered that with a resigned sigh—I wasn’t looking forward to it, but it wasn’t a surprise that an apology was one of the things Celestia expected. “Yeah,” I answered. “Sure, I’ll apologize to her.”

Celestia noticed my distinct lack of enthusiasm, and the disapproving frown reappeared on her face. “And I expect a sincere apology from you, Sunset. Otherwise it is nothing more than a collection of empty, meaningless words. As part of your new assignment, you will attend to Cadance until she is fully healed. You will treat her with respect and with kindness, even if she treats you the way you treated her in the events leading up to your attack. Though I would hope she is better than that, I could hardly blame her for feeling bitter towards you. If she is, I expect you to address and resolve that problem as part of your penance.”

I tried not to show just how much I didn’t like that rule, but I’m pretty sure my ears flicking gave me away. Bad enough that I was gonna be stuck playing nursemaid, but I also had to just sit there and take any insults Cadenza decided to dish out? How was that fair?

Celestia interrupted my thoughts, her voice utterly uncompromising. “Do you understand me, Sunset?”

“Yeah, I understand.” I didn’t like it, but I definitely understood it. Before I could think better of it, a question tumbled out of my mouth. “Why does she get to be a princess? She never did anything to earn it!”

Celestia took her time answering me. “Cadance has done a great deal to earn her ascension. Just because you were not present to witness those acts does not mean they did not happen. And more so than her actions, she ascended because it was her destiny to become an alicorn and thus a princess.”

There was that destiny word again. Well as long as we were on the subject... “Is it my destiny to become an alicorn princess too?” I’d suspected as much for a long time, but after everything that had happened I wanted—no, I needed confirmation.

Celestia was quiet for so long that I was starting to wonder if I needed to repeat the question before she finally gave me an answer. “You have the potential to become that, yes. But you are a long way from fulfilling that potential right now, and you’ve taken the first steps on a path that might deny you that opportunity entirely.”

My jaw dropped at that news. She was thinking of taking away my destiny because of what happened with Cadenza? “Why? Why are you taking it away from me? Haven't I done everything you wanted me to do? Haven't I studied every day for years?” I’d planned on trying to keep calm and quiet, but pretty soon I was shouting at her. “Cadenza hasn't had to do a lick of work to earn her princesshood, and she doesn’t have a clue about how to be a princess! She doesn’t know anything about politics or magic, but you still made her a princess! I have to work my plot off for a decade, then you tell me I'm still not good enough! How is that fair?”

Celestia let a patient sigh, the way she did whenever I was having a hard time figuring out one of her lessons. “Becoming an alicorn is not something you can earn by studying books and learning spells. Ascension changes who and what a pony is on a fundamental level. It's as much about the journey as the final goal. Cadance has managed to finish her journey, and I plan on helping you to do the same in time. Do not compare yourself to Cadance; hers was a different road than your own, but one no less worthy of respect and admiration.” A slight frown crossed her face, and she added, “If you would judge her for lacking your skill with magic, I would point out that were the situation reversed, you would be a far poorer flier than her.”

Okay, maybe she had a point about Cadenza’s magic. That didn’t mean she was right about everything else, though. “Yeah, sure Cadenza took a different path or whatever. That’s why now I’m getting demoted to being her tutor and nurse.”

Celestia stepped over to my side and wrapped a wing around me. “Sunset, I’m not doing this merely to punish or humiliate you. I want you to make amends with Cadance for your own sake. Please, spend time with her. I think you will find that you have just as much to learn from her as she has to learn from you. I promise, it will help you on your own journey. In all honesty, that is one of the reasons why I brought her to Canterlot and had her live in the palace: to help you.”

I pulled out from under her wing, letting out an angry little growl. “I’m supposed to learn from her? You have to be kidding! She doesn't know a single thing about magic! I’ve seen unmarked fillies who knew more than she does! The only thing she knows anything about is love and friendship.” I let out a contemptuous snort. “Yeah, her love and friendship did a great job stopping that fireball I chucked at her.” An instant after the words left my mouth I regretted them, but I couldn’t quite bring myself to apologize or take them back.

Celestia frowned and let out an exasperated little huff. “Do not underestimate love and friendship. For they are far more powerful than you may realize. For all that you know of spellcasting, I’m afraid you still do not understand the more powerful forms of magic.” She conjured a ball of fire and let it hover in front of my face. “Do you think this is power, Sunset? I assure you, the ability to make a bit of fire is child’s play compared to what love and friendship can create.”

“That’s what I keep hearing,” I grumbled under my breath. “So far I haven’t seen much evidence for it, though. Just a lot of talk.”

Celestia let out a frustrated little huff. “Friendship isn’t something you can understand by reading about it in a book or sticking it under a microscope, Sunset. And it is something you need to experience if you ever want to fulfill your destiny. I’d hoped getting you out of your tower would help with that, but as much as I enjoyed having you at my side on a daily basis, the results were ... unsatisfactory. That was my failing; I can give you so many things to help you grow, but I cannot give you friendship. That is something you have to discover for yourself, though I had hoped Cadance might be able to help you.”

I still wasn’t sure whether I believed her claim that she’d hoped elevating Cadance would help me, given what an obvious slap in the face it was. Though I guess Celestia hadn’t seen things that way. “If all that’s true, then why did you adopt her?”

“A few reasons,” Celestia answered calmly. “First and foremost is that she does not have any family—she was an orphan, raised in a small earth pony village. There were many ponies who loved her and whom she loved in return, but she never had a proper family.” She paused for a minute to let that sink in. I guess I was supposed to feel sorry for her, now that I knew she was orphan. I mean, being an orphan was sad and all, but everypony has problems they need to deal with. You don’t see me running around demanding everypony feel sad for me just because my parents didn’t do a very good job of raising me. I just dealt with it and moved on.

“Furthermore,” Celestia continued, “I believe it would be best if all the alicorns remain tied to the royal household in some way. It will help the ponies of Equestria accept her and give her the authority she will need to help rule Equestria. ‘Princess Cadance, niece of Princess Celestia’ commands respect far more easily than Cadance could in her own right.”

My ears perked up at that. She’d adopted Cadance because she wanted all of the alicorn princesses to be part of the royal family, and since she’d already said I would be a princess too one day... “Does that mean you'll adopt me once I become an alicorn?”

If she really did that, then as wrong as things had gone over the past couple days, it would still be okay. Every family has problems, right? And honestly, half of why I wanted to be an alicorn and a princess so much was that it would ensure me a place at her side. Plus—well, you know what they say about foals wanting to grow up being just like their parents...

Celestia dropped down until she was eye-level with me, and put a hoof on my shoulder. “Sunset, you are my student, and I love you dearly.” She closed her eyes, and voice turned firm, though no less gentle. “However, you need to accept that I am your teacher, not a replacement for your mother. I don’t want you neglecting your real family to chase after some fantasy where I replace your parents. It’s not a healthy desire.”

I flinched back as if she’d slapped me across the face. All this time I’d assumed she felt the same way I did. Sure, she’d never said it, but that was because she didn’t want to insult my parents or was hoping I could work things out with them. I had never dreamed that it was because she just didn’t want to be my mother. “Why are you doing this to me? Why don’t you want to ... to ... Why don’t you want me!?”

Celestia sighed and pulled me into a hug. “Sunset, as your teacher it is my duty to do what is best for you. Even if you don't see it at first. Even if it hurts you. Please, calm down. I see now there is much we need to talk about.”

“Calm down?” I shoved her back, freeing myself from her grasp. “You reject me and cast me aside like yesterday’s trash, and then you ask me to calm down? You expect me to just calmly accept the insults you’ve heaped upon me ever since that Cadenza nag showed up? You’ve demoted me from your protégé to a mere trainer for the pony you really care about! But apparently I should just ‘calm down’ because no reasonable pony would be upset by something like that!”

“Sunset, listen to me!” Celestia grabbed me by the shoulders, forcing me to meet her eyes. “You are still my student. That hasn’t changed, and it will never change. The only thing that’s different is what I want you to learn about. You are not being demoted, replaced, cast aside, or anything of that nature.”

“You say that, but we both know it isn't true!” It felt like my entire world was crashing down around me. I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t think of any way to fix it. Hay, I could barely even remember how to breathe, let alone actually think things through rationally. “What did I do wrong? I thought I was a good student! Do I need to study harder? Did I mess up on one of your tests? Did I say the wrong thing one of the times we were out in public together? Tell me what I did wrong so I can fix it! Please! I can still fix it, and then you can adopt me and everything will be fine! Just tell me what I need to do!” I planted my hooves on her chest. “It’s not fair! How can I fix it when you won’t tell me what to do?”

“Sunset, calm yourself. Please.” Celestia squeezed my shoulders. “You don’t need to do anything right now. You are still very precious to me—you always have been, and you always will be. You made a mistake with Cadance, but you haven’t failed me. If anything, I have failed you.”

I snarled and slapped her hooves away. “If that were true, then why am I going from a future princess to a tutor and a nurse for the pony you really care about? You say I’m important, but she’s the one you adopted, the one you made into a princess!”

Something fell into place for me, and I realized what she must be building up to. Sure, she wasn’t getting rid of me yet, but she was laying the groundwork for it. Why else would she need a spare princess around unless she was thinking of getting rid of me? I felt some wall of inner restraint within my mind collapse as I realized what was happening. “You can't take my destiny, my princesshood away from me! You promised it to me! It's mine!”

“Sunset Shimmer!” Instead of gentle concern, there was iron-hard authority in Celestia’s voice now. She wasn’t looking at me like I was just an angry little filly throwing a temper tantrum now. She was worried. Maybe even scared. Good. She should be scared. I wasn’t some filly she could jerk around without facing any consequences. “I have taken nothing from you, Sunset. Once you are worthy, you will become a princess. Nothing has changed if you do not make it change. Losing your temper and yelling at me does nothing to help your chances.”

She still thought she could lecture me? After everything she’d done, everything she put me through? “I've worked for a decade to earn my destiny. A decade. Every single day, for ten years. I studied hard. I remembered every single thing you taught me, even the thing like your lessons about friendship that didn’t make any sense! I've earned princesshood! I deserve it! More than that nag Cadenza ever did! Give it to me!”

Celestia drew herself up to her full height and broke out the tone she usually only used whenever she needed to assert her authority as supreme ruler of Equestria. “That is enough, Sunset Shimmer! I am certainly not going to make you a princess just because you throw a temper tantrum like a little filly who isn’t getting her way. You will return to your tower at once and remain there until you can conduct yourself with the level of basic maturity I expect from a mare your age.” When I didn’t immediately run off to obey her orders, she stomped a hoof hard enough to crack the marble floor beneath it. “Now, young lady!”

I almost obeyed on pure instinct. The sheer presence and force of personality Princess Celestia could exert when she wanted to was almost physically overwhelming. Thankfully, I knew her well enough that I was used to dealing with her, even when she was throwing around her royal authority. “No!” I shouted at her, and my horn flared to life as I instinctively conjured more fire. “I won’t let you treat me like a bucking two-year-old! Do you have any idea what you’ve done to me? Everything I've done, every single moment of my life from the day we met, all I've ever wanted to do was to make you proud! I studied every day, practiced my spells until I was ready to drop from exhaustion, just so I could get your approval! If you take that away from me I have nothing! I am nothing!” I lashed out at her with a wild blast. “See how much I've learned! Are you proud of me now?!”

Celestia was no Cadenza; the instant she saw my attack, she deflected it upward, where it slammed against the ceiling without harming anything more than mural painted on the throne room’s ceiling. Her eyes narrowed, and when she spoke the sheer volume and power of her voice nearly knocked me off my hooves. “Sunset Shimmer! You will stop this at once, or so help me—”

“I’m not taking any more orders from you!” I snarled as I gathered every bit of heat I could, until frost covered the windows and icicles began forming on the ceiling. “If you have anything left to say, then tell me how proud you are!” I unleashed the fire, hammering futilely against Celestia’s unbreakable defense. “Tell me how much you love me!” Glass shattered as I followed the flames with a dozen daggers of ice, which she brushed aside with a flick of her horn. “Tell me about the great destiny you’re going to help me fulfill!” I telekinetically grabbed the window shards and hurled it at her, to no more effect than any of my other attacks. “Tell me how I’m the daughter you never had!”

I kept pounding uselessly against her defenses until I could barely manage more than a few feeble sparks of magic. It didn’t help that all the fire I’d thrown at her had probably used up most of the oxygen in the room, leaving me gasping for air. More than that, I just felt ... empty. Drained. Like after I’d hurled all of my rage at her, there was nothing else left. Just a huge, gaping hole in the middle of my chest that I had no idea how to fill.

Celestia stepped forward, her horn glowing, conjuring golden chains of pure light. Even if there had been anything left in me to fight back with, I would’ve been as helpless against her as Cadenza had been against me. Instead I just sat there and let the chains bind me. One smaller chain wrapped around my horn, containing my magic just as effectively as the rest of the chains trapped my body.

Celestia slowly strode forward, a steady flow of magic coming off her horn to hold me in place. Her voice trembled as she spoke. “Sunset ... my beloved student.” She came a halt in front of me, one hoof rising half off the ground as if she wanted to caress me or pull me into a hug before she remembered why she couldn’t. “What madness has overtaken you? Please, talk to me. I want to help you. I never wanted to hurt you or make you think I didn’t care. Have I truly been so blind to the troubles growing within your heart, that this is the only way you could reach me?”

I wanted to be mad at her, but I couldn’t find the energy for it anymore. All I wanted to do was go back to my tower, curl up in my bed and cry. “You don't want to help me.” I struggled against the chains, but it was a token effort. Even if the chains weren’t there, I don’t think I could’ve summoned the energy to make it more than five steps before I collapsed.

Celestia froze at my words, and her hoof slowly dropped back to ground. “Of course I do. More than you realize. I love you with all my heart. Sunset, if you could just see yourself as I see you—you have the potential to do so much good, bring so much joy to so many ponies.” She concentrated and teleported an adamantine inhibitor ring to her side. “That was what blinded me. All I saw was your potential for greatness, and all I could think about was how unbelievably proud of you I was. I loved you too much to see the darkness growing in your heart. I have failed you, but I promise that I will do everything in my power to make this right.”

Despite all her kind words, my eyes were fixed on the inhibitor ring. Those were only used when a unicorn’s magic needed to be locked away for a substantial period of time. “You're going to put me in jail? Why not send me to the moon instead? That’s what you do when ponies you say you love let you down, isn’t it?”

Celestia recoiled at the words, and the flow of magic to her binding spells halted. “You attacked me, Sunset. Yesterday, you badly burned Cadance. You need help, and I can’t risk you hurting anypony else while I’m trying to find the best way to help you. I need time to understand what went wrong and what measures I must take to correct it. I swear to you, I will make this right, but first you let me help you. Please, Sunset.”

“By putting me in prison?” The despair that had all but paralyzed me vanished, replaced by pure terror and the animal instinct to escape. “No! You can’t lock me up in your dungeons!” I threw everything I could, both magically and physically, against the spells holding me down. Normally, I wouldn’t have had a prayer, but her concentration had already broken. Without maintenance, any spell can eventually be overpowered, even Princess Celestia’s. I was one of the strongest unicorns in Equestria, after all.

Celestia jumped in surprise as her chains shattered. “No! This will not happen again! Never again! I am not going to lose you too, Sunset!” When I realized what she was talking about, I grew even more terrified. I could see her readying her magic once more, and I knew she wouldn’t make the same mistake twice. If I didn’t get out of here now, I would be spending the rest of my life in the palace dungeons. Or worse—I knew how that story with her sister had ended.

“You’re right.” I prepared the only spell I could think of that might give me a chance of escaping. “It won’t happen again. I won’t let it.”

I teleported out of the throne room, and back to my tower.

I knew I needed to keep moving. I’d learned that spell from Celestia, so it wouldn’t be shocking if she had some way of finding out where I’d gone. And even if she didn’t, my tower would probably be the very first place she looked. It was my home, my refuge. Plus, all my things were here. I didn’t want to go on the run without taking so much as a coinpurse with me. I didn’t want to go on the run at all, but what choice did I have? It was that or familiarize myself with the inside of the palace dungeons. Assuming I didn’t just end up keeping Nightmare Moon company.

I tried to focus on what I needed to pack, but I just had no idea. Yesterday, I never would’ve considered what I might need to live as a fugitive. Pretty much everything I’d ever needed had been provided by Celestia. I wasn’t completely sheltered, but I was used to having things taken care of. I’d never had to worry about whether I would still have a roof over my head, or where my next meal would come from. What would I do once I ran out of bits? Pretty much all I really knew how to do was use magic, and showing off the full extent of magical talents would make it easy to find me. But I couldn’t just do without my magic either; it was who I was!

I needed to calm down and think this all through rationally. Easier said than done. I’d just attacked Celestia! What the hay had I been thinking? Something clamped down on my chest, and I could barely breathe as the world swam around me. I had attacked the mare who was, in everything but blood, my mother! What was wrong with me? No wonder Celestia wanted to throw me in the dungeons!

I started grabbing whatever I could find and frantically shoving it into a garbage bag. I should’ve used a suitcase, but I couldn’t remember where I’d put mine. There wasn’t any time to think about it, Celestia would be here any minute now! I had to run! Run and find somewhere so hidden and so far away that she would never find me.

Did I even deserve to get away, after everything I’d done? Maybe I should be locked up in prison, or sent to the moon. That’s what I would say should happen to anypony else who had attacked Celestia.

No. I couldn’t afford to think that. I couldn’t afford to think. I needed to run!

Then I heard the fizzling pop that Celestia’s personal teleportation spell always produced, and saw the flash of light that accompanied it. Too late to run. Celestia’s hoof dropped onto my shoulder. “Sunset, stop this. You aren't behaving rationally.”

I growled and shrugged the hoof off. “Leave me alone! I never want to see you again!” I went back to shoving everything I could think of into my impromptu luggage.

Celestia let out a huff and used her own magic to rip open my bag, spilling everything I’d packed up back onto the floor. “I am not going to let you run away like a child who wants her parents’ attention.” She sighed and dropped down to eye-level with me. “Sunset, I understand you’re upset, please believe me when I say I understand that. But this is not the way to handle this. Please, just calm down and talk to me. I’m not mad about what happened back in the throne room, and I’m not going to lock you up or send you to the moon. I just want you to calm down. You’re scared, hurt, and you’re lashing out in a way that makes you a danger to everypony around you—but most of all yourself.”

“I don’t believe you!” I shrieked at her. Spells had done nothing, and trying to hit her with my hooves would’ve been just as useless, so I hurt her the only way I could. “You never loved me! Never cared about me! I was just some tool for you to use in whatever political destiny game you’re playing! You’re worse than my parents! At least they were honest!” I took a deep breath, and then screamed at the top of my lungs. “I hate you!”

Celestia stepped back, and to my shock I saw unshed tears in her eyes. Her words came out slightly choked, as if she were struggling to keep her emotions in check. “I know you don’t really believe any of that, Sunset. I know you’re just saying it to hurt me.” She wiped a wing across her face. “And it worked. You’ve hurt me. Does that at least make you feel better? You can say whatever you want, as long as you just stop and listen to me once you’re done.”

It didn’t make me feel better, if anything it made me feel worse. I’d reduced her to verge of crying, and I’d done it on purpose out of pure spite. I wanted to rush up to her, hug her, and apologize for everything. Tell her how sorry I was for all the terrible things I’d said, for hurting her, everything. But I couldn’t do any of it. I felt almost like an observer, watching helplessly from outside the scene, screaming at myself to stop this and go back to her while I still could. Instead, I just snarled and turned away from her. “I'm done listening to you. I don’t know why I ever did in the first place.” I left behind everything Celestia had spilled out of my bag, just grabbing some bits and a simple robe, then heading for the door.

Before I’d gotten more than halfway across the room, a shield of golden light blocked the exit. A look out the windows confirmed that they were blocked too; the whole tower had been enclosed. “I'm not done speaking with you, Sunset.”

I tried teleporting, but nothing happened. Of course Celestia wouldn’t leave that escape route open. The only reason I’d gotten away with it the first time was how quickly everything had escalated. I fell back on the option I had left; talking to her. “If you're gonna attack me, then get it over with. We both know I can't beat you.”

Celestia didn’t make a single move, but everything about her changed. It was a subtle thing, there was no one part of it that really stood out, but suddenly she looked ... old. Normally she looked timeless and unchanging, like all the years had slid off of her with no effect, but now I could see every single one of them in the sag of her shoulders and the way her head bowed down. As if all the centuries of her life and the massive responsibility of watching over Equestria had worn her down, and all that was left was a tired, broken-down mare who had lost everything she cared about, and only thing she had left was her sense of duty.

“Fighting you is the last thing I want, Sunset.” She slowly stretched out a hoof to me. “Do you remember when you were still a filly, and I would read stories to you? I kept reading them even when you said you were too old for bedtime stories, because I knew that deep down you still secretly enjoyed them. Or that time you tried to bake a cake to celebrate the one-year anniversary of becoming my student. It was terrible, but when you looked at me with your big, innocent eyes and asked me if I liked it I couldn’t bear to tell you the truth. I ate the whole thing even though it made me sick for a week afterwards. And you were there for me every day, doing anything you could think of to help me feel better.”

The memories came flooding back. All the good times we’d shared together. I’d almost forgotten about them, and now I wondered how that could’ve happened. I’d always told myself Celestia was like a mother to me, but somewhere along the way I’d forgotten why she’d earned that title. “I remember it.” I wiped at my own eyes. “I remember every moment.”

“So do I.” Celestia’s hoof remained extended towards me, her eyes pleading with me to take it. “I will always remember it. Ten thousand years from now, if I’m still alive, I will remember and cherish those moments just as clearly as I would if they had happened yesterday. Please ... let’s just forget about everything that’s happened today. We can deal with it tomorrow, but right now I just want to hold you, like I did when you were still a filly who needed somepony to hug you.”

I wanted to go to her. More than almost anything in the world, I wanted to go to her, and let her hold me like a mother. The mother I’d always wanted, the mother I’d deserved. But I couldn’t do that. Too much had happened, and I couldn’t just turn back the clock and pretend we were still in the good old days. I took a deep breath. “I’m leaving, Celestia. I know you can stop me, but you’ll have to either put me in your dungeons or lock me up in a spell like the one you’ve got right now. However, you can’t hold me forever. The more you try to keep me here, the further I’ll run and the deeper I’ll hide when I escape.”

Celestia’s face crumbled. “But ... but why, Sunset?”

“Because I need to get away from you.” Remembering everything we’d once shared had finally done what she’d wanted; I had calmed down—but at the same time it had brought things into focus. Instead of being consumed by wild panic that bordered on madness, I finally understood what was going on in my own head. “It’s like I said, all I’ve ever wanted was to be a good student for you. My whole life since that day we met has revolved around that. Being your student. Pleasing you. Earning your approval.” My eyes dropped down. “Earning your love.”

“You never needed to earn that, Sunset.” Celestia shifted closer to me, cautiously wrapping a wing around me. I didn’t shove it away, but I didn’t press any closer against her either. “You had my love from the moment I met you. And no matter what happens, you will have it until the day I die.”

“It’s not about that.” I sighed and shook my head. “It’s ... I can’t keep living my life trying to do whatever it is I think will impress you. As you said, it’s not healthy, constantly hoping that if I work a bit harder or push myself a bit further I’ll finally get everything I want from you. I can’t spend the rest of my life trying to be the pony I think you want me to be.” I pulled her wing a little bit tighter around myself. “You said everypony with my kind of destiny needs to walk their own path, right? If that’s true, then I don’t think I’m even gonna find my path as long as I keep trying to force myself to follow yours. Being a princess is about being a leader, right? Well how can I learn how to lead by blindly following you? Even becoming a princess is something you’ve always told me was my destiny. Would I really be a princess because it’s what I want, or would I just be doing it for your sake?” My shoulders slumped down as I delivered my conclusion, "If it is my destiny to become an alicorn, then I think the only way I can ever find it is to do it by myself. As long as I’m with you, I’ll never get it right.”

Celestia stiffened, and a note of genuine fear entered her voice. “Sunset, the path I have set for you will lead to your ascension in due time, I promise you. It’s hard to explain to somepony who hasn’t ... who doesn’t have an alicorn’s perspective on the world, but I give you my word that you will become an alicorn, so long as you remain at my side.” She sighed and shook her head. “You were right earlier, though. I don’t ... I can’t keep you imprisoned in your tower. After Luna, I don’t think I could live with myself if I did that to another pony I loved. Not unless I had no other choice. But if I let you leave...” She trailed off, and took a moment to gather her thoughts. “Destiny is a fickle thing at the best of times, and the road you would walk down without me could lead to very dark places.”

A distant look clouded her eyes, as if she was remembering something from long ago. “You know our history; every single pony who tried to become an alicorn without my guidance met a bad end. Most became so consumed by their lust for alicorn magic that it twisted them, and if they finally found some spell or ritual they believed might accomplish the task it merely stripped away the mask and revealed the monster within. If you go down that path, the pony that comes out the other side might be one none of us will like.” Her eyes slowly hardened. “You might become something that I will have to stop, Sunset. No matter how much it breaks my heart, you might force my hoof. If need be, I will protect my subjects from you.”

She was right. I’d done enough reading to know how badly things could go wrong. That didn’t change my resolve. “Maybe that’ll happen. I might fail if I try to go it alone, but if I do, then at least it’ll be my failure. It’s tearing me apart just trying to live up to your example, and the harder I keep trying the worse it’s going to get. Maybe you’re right, and this could all end with me turning into a monster, but at least I’ll only have myself to blame if that happens. I’d rather live and die on my own terms than live out the rest of my life as an alicorn princess who gave up every scrap of herself just to get a set of wings.”

Celestia kept her wing firmly in place around me. “Sunset, you don’t understand. I’ve seen too many ponies go down the path you’ve traveled, and no matter what happens it ends in misery. The last mare I knew who tried to walk this path eventually became so twisted that a mare who loved her as a daughter had to kill her to end the threat. I can’t watch you go down that road, and I won’t let that happen to you too.”

I finally gave in and pressed against her side. She was just as warm as I remembered. “How will I ever find my destiny if you won’t let me walk my own path? And if you’re afraid of me becoming a monster...” My ears dropped, and my voice dropped as I confessed, “I think I’ve done a pretty good job of that today, even with all your guidance. At least this way, whatever happens, we’ll both know it’s all on me. If I fail, you won’t have to blame yourself for it.”

“I have already failed you, just in letting things come to this point.” Celestia’s wing tightened around me. “I don't want you to go, Sunset. I am sorry if I did anything to hurt you. If you give me the chance, I will do what I can to make it better. But you need to give me time. Please, just give me a week to find some other way to help you. This isn’t a decision you should make on the spur of the moment. Besides, you still need to talk to Cadance before you leave. And you parents too. It would give you time to properly prepare yourself.”

I reluctantly began pulling away from her. “Celestia ... if I stay for a week, it would be that much harder to leave. I don’t think I’d be able to manage it.” From the way her ears drooped ever-so-slightly, I think she’d been hoping exactly that would happen. She didn’t want to help me leave, she just wanted more time to find a way to convince me to stay.

“Will you at least give me time to make some arrangements, then?” Celestia pleaded. “If you feel like you need time away from the palace, I could arrange to have you study with somepony else for a while. You would learn things I can’t teach you, and you would have enough distance to gain some perspective on your life.”

I won’t deny it was a tempting offer. It gave me almost everything I wanted, without having to make that painful final separation. Except making that break was the whole point. Even if I went to study under somepony else for a while, I would still be doing it as Celestia’s student. I would still be trapped in that cycle of trying to remake myself in her image.

I had to go. To hay with staying for a week, every minute I stayed made it harder to actually follow through and leave. Sooner or later she would make an offer that would tempt me enough, and I would give in. Then we would be right back where we started. “Goodbye, Celestia.” I gently removed her wing, rose to my hooves, and started for the door.

“Wait.” Celestia called out after me. Despite everything I’d just told myself about the necessity of acting quickly, I paused in the threshold. Celestia strode to my side, and put a hoof on my shoulder. “Sunset, I know things have been difficult, but you are always welcome back here, my student. You will always have a home here. No matter what. And if your journey is as dangerous as I fear it might be, then I will find a way to save you. No matter what it takes, or how far you fall, I will find a way to bring you back. That’s a promise.”

For a moment, I tried to tell myself to just keep walking out the door. I couldn’t let her words affect me, or I would start doubting my decision all over again. But not letting what she’d said slip past my defenses would’ve been impossible. I cracked and all but galloped back to her, latching onto her and hugging her like I was still that scared little filly. “I love you! I'm sorry for everything! I’m so sorry!”

Celestia hugged me back, every bit as tight. “I’m sorry, too, Sunset. I wish I could do more to help you. I wish I’d seen how much you needed help before it was too late.” I trembled in her embrace, and before long I could feel tears trickling down my face. Celestia nuzzled my shoulder, and left it damp as well. “Please don't do this.” Her hold tightened around me. “I don't want to lose you like this. I’ve already lost so much, had to say goodbye to so many ponies I cared so much for. I don’t know if I can bear to lose you too.”

“I have to do it.” I gave her as reassuring of a squeeze as I could. “You’re strong. You’re the Princess of Equestria. It hurts, but you’ll be okay. Having me walk out on you can’t be the worst thing you’ve ever had to deal with, right?” I tried to smile at her, but my heart wasn’t in it. “Maybe ... maybe some day I can come back. Once it’s finished, or once I’m ... better. Once I’m settled enough that I won’t blow up every time I feel like I’m not being the perfect student.”

“Please do.” She pulled me closer, holding me like she used to when I was a sad little filly who needed a mother, so she clung to the closest substitute she could find. “Use the lessons I have taught you for good. Be yourself, but try and do what is right for your fellow ponies. I know your heart is troubled, but I also know that deep down, you’re a good pony. Never forget that: for all your pain, confusion, and mistakes, you still have the capacity to do so much good. And I still believe that one day, you will become a truly wonderful mare.”

I sniffled and wiped my eyes on her shoulder. “Y-you always saw the best in me. Even when I didn’t deserve it. Even when I didn’t deserve you. I—I'm sorry for everything.”

Celestia took one of my hooves in hers, holding onto it as if that would be enough to keep me by her side. “If you ever need anything. Anything at all. Whatever you need, whenever you need it. My door will always be open to you. This will always be your home, and you will always be my student.” She paused, frowned, and shook her head. “No. Student ... that’s not the right word. It’s what you were to me at first, and what I always told myself you should be. But no matter how much I told myself that, the truth is that somewhere along the line...”

She couldn’t bring herself to finish the sentence, but she didn’t need to. We both know the truth. “It’s okay ... Mom.”

My mother—not the mare who bore me, and whose blood flowed in my veins, but my mother nonetheless—shivered at the word, giving me one final, desperate squeeze. She kissed me on the forehead, and then very slowly and reluctantly, she let me go. “Be safe, Sunset. And come home to me, when you’re ready.”

“I will,” I promised her. “Goodbye, Mom.”

I teleported outside of the castle and ran off into the night.

Author's Note

Sunset Shimmer will return in “The Freeport Venture."