"Dear Celestia. Where in the world is that filly?"
"Patience, Raborn. She'll be here soon."
"Patience?! We've been out here for two HOURS, Beignet! I've been more than patient. Patience cost me lunch."
"Watch your blood pressure, Raborn. Doctor Blue Vein was very clear on not getting too stressed or angry. Besides, you were the one that said we should wait for her before we grabbed a bite."
"That's because she's our guest and we should treat her to a meal. Also, the train ride from Ponyville to Neigh Orleans is 5 hours long. Last time I rode out there I got so hungry I ate an apple core out of the trash."
"You realize there's a snack car for literally that reason, right?"
"..."
"..."
"...I may or may not have just learned that. Damn, that apple core gave me a bad case of the Trots too."
"Too much information, hun."
"If I get my hooves on the conductor of this train, I swear to the sun, I'll give him a good kick to the-"
"Hush, Raborn, here comes the train now."
~*~
The train slowly braked into the station. The squealing making some ponies cringe as it came to a complete stop. Ponies began to exit the train at a casual pace as train workers unloaded the luggage into separate piles.
Maud Pie stepped off the train's stairs and walked onto the platform. She stopped to take in her surroundings.
Many ponies were waiting for friends and loved ones, some even had signs. A particular pair of ponies grabbed her attention. One being a light brown mare with a white mane. She wore black shoes, a black bow tie, and a little white hat. Her cutie mark was a little grey sugar-shaker on a cloud of sugar. Next to her was a sitting, dark brown stallion with a lighter brown mane. He wore a dark blue hoodie with what looked like Princess Luna's cutie mark on it. He had a sign leaning against himself that obscured his cutie mark. The sign read "Ms. Maud Pie."
Maud Pie walked toward the two. They noticed her and the stallion quickly stood up, revealing his cutie mark. His cutie mark was a playing card featuring one of Celestia's guards, the card in question being the Jack of Spades. The mare smiled warmly.
"Well hi there, Ms. Pie," said the mare, "I do hope you remember us from our letters. I'm Beignet, the mascot of DerpyCon South. This here is Raborn, the convention organizer."
"Good afternoon, Ms. Pie," said Raborn, bowing his head slightly, "On behalf of DerpyCon South, I'd like to welcome you to Neigh Orleans!"
Maud looked around, her face emotionless. She finally looked back to Raborn.
"We should probably grab my bags." said Maud, walking towards a particular pair of bags.
Beignet looked to Raborn with a worried expression. Raborn merely shrugged.
***
"Well here's your room, Ms. Pie," said Beignet, "Here, let me get the door."
With a clicking sound, the door unlocked. Beignet turned the knob and opened the door allowing Maud to enter first.
"I do hope you find everything to your liking, Ms. Pie." said Beignet, "The Hamptrot Hotel is known to be one of the better hotels in Neigh Orleans, and it's so close to the rest of the city. We can show you around tomorrow after you get settled."
There was a brief moment of silence before Maud's response.
"...Well, if my bags ever get here."
"Just a *gasp* moment, Ms. *gasp* Pie" said a rather out of breath Raborn.
Raborn finally entered the hotel room walking backwards. On his back were Maud's saddlebags that were quite large and bulging in places. In his mouth he was gripping the strap of a rather large, wheeled suitcase. Once Raborn had entered the room a decent enough amount, he let go of the suitcase and took off the saddlebags. He was sweating quite a fair amount and seemed unable to catch his breath.
"Ms. Pie, *gasp* If I can ask, what are *wheeze* in these bags?"
Maud looked at Raborn with the same expressionless face.
"Rocks."
Raborn looked at Beignet with an expression that said 'Help Me.'
"Um...Ms. Pie, why don't I help you unpack while Raborn here goes out in the lobby to grab himself a drink."
"Yeah *gasp* then we can take you out for *wheeze* lunch."
"I ate already," said Maud, "On the train."
Beignet shot Raborn a look of "I told you so." A few moments passed before Raborn spoke.
"If you would excuse me, Ms. Pie."
With that Raborn left the room and went down the hall. A faint sound was heard that was very similar to that of a pony smacking their head into a wall.
~*~
"She's...alright. A little monotone, but nothing bad."
"Nothing bad?! She brought a load of rocks halfway across Equestrian for no good reason!"
"Princess Luna, Raborn, they're minerals! Well some of them are, anyway. Besides, a few rocks don't hurt nobody. My granny puts them in her gumbo to add a bit of zest."
"You< didn't have to haul them up two flights of stairs! Broken elevator my-"
"Watch your language, Raborn, there's fillies here. You're just angry because your hungry. I'm sure once we get some fast food into you, you'll be right as rain."
"....Maybe."
"Now, do we know where we're gonna take her for dinner?"
"No worries, Beignet, I have it all planned out. From now until we walk out the train station Sunday evening."
"You sure?"
"Positive. There's a reason I'm the convention organizer."
"Is it because you can eat a whole order of hay fries in 9.95 seconds flat.
"Shut up and go pick up our order."
~*~
The door of the restaurant opened as Raborn exited and held the door for Maud and Beignet. They began to walk as a group back to the hotel. Neigh Orleans, even though it was dusk, was still full of ponies in taxis and carriages try to grab their slice of the night life. Residents and tourists alike shared the sideway making short trips to many a destination.
Raborn caught up with Maud and matched her pace.
"You know, Ms. Pie," said Raborn, "When you eat crawfish you're supposed to eat the meat inside the shell and not the shell itself."
"But the shell was hard, similar but not identical to that of a rock. Unfortunately, rocks only have more rock, or crystals if it's a geode, on the inside instead of meat."
Raborn was left silent for several moments. He deeply pondered a response that would sound interested and not rude. Suddenly a clever one hit him.
"Well, Ms. Pie," said Raborn, "That totally rocks."
There suddenly was the brief and silent sound of Beignet facehoofing.
"Really Raborn?" asked Maud, "Rock puns?"
Raborn hung his head and slowed down to walk behind Maud. Beignet quickened her pace to walk next to Maud. While she did she whispered into Raborn's ear:
"Great going, Mr. Pun Organizer."
Raborn rolled his eyes. This was going to be a long weekend for him.
Author's Note
DerpyCon South is a convention that's close to my heart because it lead to me actually becoming a brony in the first place. I was only into Doctor Whooves before DerpyCon South, but attending the convention opened my eyes to the community. After the convention I watched all through season 3 in a Netflix binge watching session and became full on brony. In honor of the upcoming convention (September 20th-21st) I'm writing a fanfiction version of the con featuring Maud Pie, the pony version of our actual guest Ingrid Nilson.
Please note that the chapter names represent the day in the fanfiction. The con starts on Saturday, so next chapter is a Neigh Orleans chapter. I do hope you enjoy.
"Raborn, can you hoof me my shoe?"
"Here."
"Merci."
"I'm still not sure about today."
"What do you mean by that?"
"It's just that...I'm not sure if Maud's going to enjoy where we go today. It's so hard to gauge whether she's enjoying herself or not."
"I know what you mean. I used to have a-BOWTIE!"
"You used to have a bowtie?"
"No, it's just that Chicory knows how to tie a bowtie and I...can't...get it...RIGHT."
"Need a hoof?"
"No. I am...perfectly...CAPABLE....Yes, if you wouldn't mind."
"Sure."
"Like I was saying, I used to have a customer like her. He was a Prench Zebra but he was totally unreadable. He would order a cup of coffee or a beignet (a little too tight) and sit at his table. There wasn't even that spark in his eye like when ponies normally eat my beignets."
"How's that?"
"Great. Thanks, Raborn. Anyway, it was just so hard to judge if I was doing something wrong. He didn't say much and I had never seen him as much as nod in acknowledgment."
"What did you do?"
"I just did my best and eventually he stopped coming. I'm not sure if he was sick of my beignets or he just went back to Prance, I just tried not to think on it too hard. I did my best and if it couldn't make him happy, then that's just how praline crumbles."
"Hmm...I'll keep that in mind. Thanks, Beignet."
"No problem. Now let's go across the hall and see if she's up."
***
Raborn knocked the door, his mind trying to go over their schedule for the 30th or 40th time since he woke up.
It wasn't a complicated schedule by any means. It was quite tentative incase they wanted to stay in one place longer than others. He hoped that they could do everything on the schedule and get back early enough that he could start pre-DerpyCon South preparations.
First things first, Maud had to open the door.
Raborn raised his hoof to knock again when the door opened. There stood Maud who, aside from her mane looking recently brushed, looked exactly like she did yesterday.
"Good morning, Ms. Pie!" said Beignet, "I do hope you had yourself a nice sleep."
"The bed was a bit too soft," said Maud, "Besides that it seemed good enough."
"Ummm...Ms. Pie?" Raborn spoke up, "Your room has the hardest mattress that the Hamptrot Hotel could find. Just like you requested."
Maud just shrugged and Raborn made a mental note to talk to the staff later.
"Well, mattresses aside, are you ready to head out?" asked Beignet, "We have a full day planned. Right, Raborn?"
With mention of his name Raborn's ears perked up. He had been lost in the thought of how to go about increasing mattress hardness when Beignet had said his name. He vaguely remembered Beignet saying "Day planned" and she was now looking at him expectantly. Raborn just nodded and hoped to the Princesses he didn't agree to something weird again. Like those buffalo yodeling lessons.
"Riiiiight!" said Beignet with a slight sing-song in her voice, "If y'all are just about ready, Ms. Pie, it's just about time to head to our first stop...Breakfast!"
Author's Note
This is where this story ends. I really don't know enough about New Orleans to keep writing and I have no will to really continue with it. I apologise.
