Oh, joy! The school day is nearly over, and I can see the outside beckoning me back to my lovely house to finish that confounded project I've been working on all summer... Ah yes, for I am Rarity! The best dress maker in Equestria!

And what is Pinkie Pie doing?

It is art class, and I don't see her doing any art whatsoever. This is a total shock to me... well, not really. I've known her ever since primary school. We both managed to keep in the same classes there, and I would see her every day whether I liked it or not. And, most of the time, I did, to be quite honest.

But, not to be rude or anything, but she must be going into a phase, or she's just off the pill. She fiddles with her hooves, a gesture I know to be the latter. But the next thing I see her doing makes me think she's going through a phase. She removes a transparent glass plane and sets in on the table, having laser-engraved squares, checkered across its surface. I tilt my head ever so slightly to the side. Pinkie has never been into checkers, at least, from what I've seen. This confuses me so, and I must ask what's gotten her into such a thing...

But not right now. The bell rings out, its high-pitched dings piercing my eardrums. I rub my temples. That is simply uncouth! I think, trying to rub away a headache. Though it seems every time I use it in any case, Twilight would respond quite cockily, "That word you just said. I don't think it means what you think it means." I blow at my mane. Of course I know what it means! Why would I be using it if I didn't?

In any case, since it took quite a while for the teacher to arrive, I study with grace at what Pinkie Pie is doing. She lays out sixteen checkers on either side of the board, the plastic not going very well with the dark color of the glass. She sets them up precisely on the grid, sticking her tongue out during the process. She straightens up moments later, but still studies the board.

I can't imagine why. She is the only player, of course. Should I join her? I think, studying the board as well. I can't say that I've played this game recently, but recently enough that I at least still remember the rules. I narrow my eyes. Still though. Do I really want to embarrass myself at an impending defeat? I think about it for a moment, tilting my head back and forth, mouthing the possibilities.

Fine, I think, finally. I will join her... and the game has already begun? The checkers were set up already, of course, but they've been moved and stacked, like what you'd expect from stacking a king or a queen. On one side of the board, unstacked checkers surrounded two stacked ones, to my side, one stacked three high, the other side, two. The checkers were mixed in color; even the royalty was quite colorful itself.

This is not how the game is played... I figure out. What is she doing? It looks like the checkers are in a defensive formation... or they could be citizens? Is that what they are, Pinkie?

That's when I notice her expression. She smiles evilly, looking down at the checkers, specifically the unstacked ones. With the tip of her hoof, she moves the red-colored checkers into the semi-circle, getting closer to the multi-colored royalty.

I cock and eyebrow. Okay... the reds are moving into the civilization. Maybe they're a higher class or caste? I stroke my chin. It does appear so. Suddenly, it clicks. She's making a story from the checkers! She has to be. I turn in my seat, facing her as she did her works.

Her evil smile broadening, she slides the red checkers closer and closer to the royalty. The caste must be getting intense, I analyze, eyebrows elegantly raised. That must be horrible! But then, she does something that makes my jaw drop. She flings one of the red checkers at the three-stacked checkers, blowing them across the board. Before I have time to process what happened, another flies out and hits the queen.

I let my jaw hang, a behavior that I would normally think would be uncouth. She just... killed off the royalty? No... those reds... they are the ones to blame! All of a sudden, I feel anger toward these obviously inanimate objects that, frankly, have no feelings whatsoever. I wish them to be dealt with. I give a quick, crawling smile. They must be exterminated as soon as possible, no questions asked!

The scene changes as Pinkie Pie switches the board around, knocking all the white checkers off the board, save it two. She stacks them near the center of the board, the evil, red checkers forming a circle (or rather, an octagon) around her. I knit my eyebrows. The white queen is being outnumbered! It's only a matter of time... before the inevitable happens. No... I won't let that happen... Go, white queen! I almost yell. Give them a nice taste of female power! I pump my hooves to cheer her on.

As if my cheers actually mean something, the queen goes completely badflank. She knocks all of the red peasants off the board with a wide, swooping attack, clacking onto the desk below. There she stands, the queen, alone and proud. I feel a sudden burst of adrenaline as I nearly jump out of my seat. She was able to do it! She will be able to restore the kingdom, just you wait and see, reds!

But then something changes. My eyes widen as a tower of quadruple-stacked checkers enters in. The light glares in an evil glow off the plastic, and I swear I can hear maniacal laughter. I narrow the space between my eyebrows. No... I think. The red one isn't a king... but... an emperor? A menacing opera plays in the background as the emperor swoops in for the kill. But, fortunately, the queen dodges out of the way just before a fatal blow disables her. She slides backward, and swooshes across the board, drawing a half-circle around the emperor.

I jump up. Yes! I chant in my head. She's going in for the back-attack! She can do it! I know she can! The queen rushes in, going faster than light when she collides with the emperor, then hesitates. The emperor turns a full circle. My heart sinks to the bottom of my stomach. It... the back attack failed? I scowl, glaring at Pinkie Pie. That is not fair! Uncouth! I will not have it!

Pinkie Pie turns her head, and her eyes widen. A drop of sweat trickles from her brow as she leans back in her seat, away from me. I snort. Yes... fear me. It's time for the god to fear the pony!

With a sigh, Pinkie Pie looks back down at the checker board, and carelessly flicks the white queen toward the emperor, both of them sliced to pieces. My head spins. What have I done? I ask myself, putting my hoof to the crown of my head. I've killed the queen... I shake my head. No... she killed the evil Emperor... she will be remembered throughout the kingdom for centuries to come. I drag my hoof down to just above my eye. Salutations, my queen.

Author's Note

Little did she know, she missed the instructions for the introductory assignment, effectively getting an 'F' immediately in art class.

"Curse you, master of killing time," she whines, taking another spoonful of chocolate ice cream.