Oh Look! It's a Perfectly Normal Paring Knife!
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Apple Bloom Brings a Paring Knife to School
Oh Look! It's a Perfectly Normal Paring Knife!
"Okay, class, it's time for lunch!" sang the schoolteacher, Cheerilee, sweetly. "We'll go back to class at the regular time, and continue our studies on the inside of fruits." This, of course, involved a knife. Perfectly normal, nothing to worry about.
But that was because it was in the hooves of their teacher. With anypony else it would be completely different. This is why Apple Bloom was careful when withdrawing a paring knife and apple from her satchel at lunch today, so as not to let anypony other than her friends see the glint of the blade.
"This here apple came from one of mah sister's best trees this season," said Apple Bloom, as she sliced the apple. "So ah wanted to share this one with you girls so you could taste it. It's really juicy!"
She started to slice the apple, very carefully, since she didn't want to cut herself, but she erred on the side of caution. The ever-increasingly irritating bully, Diamond Tiara, happened to notice the paring knife in Apple Bloom's hoof. She stopped, thought for a few moments about what was quickly becoming a very promising scenario in her mind, and then screamed.
"Apple Bloom has a knife!" she screeched in abject terror, which she was surprisingly good at imitating (or, and this was much more likely, foals were very gullible). The classroom froze, and all eyes drifted to the obviously blunt knife in Apple Bloom’s hoof. Diamond Tiara glanced at Silver Spoon with a look in her eyes Silvy[1] understood all too well.
[1]: Silvy was Diamond's pet name for Silver Spoon, conversely Tia.
"She's going to kill us all!" screamed Silver, breaking the hesitant silence, and the classroom plunged into a frenzy.
"Oh my gosh I'm so scared!" exclaimed Tiara, over-dramatically, earning a facehoof from one of the CMC.
"It's so sharp!" shouted Snips[2].
[2]: The foal with a pair of scissors for a cutie mark.
"Her big brother is mind-controlling her to kill us all!" exclaimed Pipsqueak, the resident conspiracy theorist and aspiring pirate. He was stubbornly convinced that Big Macintosh was “eeeeeevil.”
"With a blunt knife," droned Cheerilee, sarcastically, in that generic teacher way. "Calm down, class. It's fine." It goes without saying that this did not work. "I said, calm down, or no recess!" That did the trick. She thanked Celestia inwardly as the foals went back to eating.
The CMC let out a collective sigh, and Apple Bloom picked the knife back up, starting to slice again. But before she could even make a full slice, Sweetie Belle stopped her. “Apple Bloom, you can’t hold the knife like that!” she warned. “It’s easier to make mistakes that way. You have to hold it with one hoof, so that the cuts and your grip will be cleaner. That’s what Rarity told me. She knows all about how to hold knives!”
Her horn lit up in a black aura, and without straining, she lifted up the paring knife to place it in her hoof. She could have easily lifted it up with one hoof, but she simply had to show off. Bad idea.
“I was right!” exclaimed another foal, whose father was a devout yellow journalist. “Rarity’s the one that wants to kill us all! Look, dark magic!”
“Huh?” asked Sweetie Belle, hardly able to process the foalish statement before the clamour started up again. In mere moments, almost all of the foals were gone, having run right out in fear.
The four remaining ponies said nothing for what seemed like an eternity. Finally, in chorus, the first thing to break the silence was, “We’re sorry, Miss Cheerilee.”
“Oh, it’s not your fault,” said their teacher, reassuringly. “Just a foalish overreaction. They’ll come back. But your magic, Sweetie.” Cheerilee pointed to the black aura surrounding Sweetie’s horn. “Why is it black?”
“More importantly, since when were you not terrible at magic?” asked Scootaloo, blunt as ever. Cheerilee and Sweetie Belle shot her a look.
“Er, ah think ah can answer that for you,” Apple Bloom interjected, sheepishly. “Ah mixed a potion to make Sweetie Belle’s magic stronger, but ah may have accidentally mixed myself up and put the stuff for an aura colour changer too.”
Sweetie Belle groaned. “Am I stuck like this?” she whined, pointing to her aura. At this point she dropped the paring knife and her magic shut off.
“Nah, should jus' last a day or two. So ah guess try not ta use your magic around other ponies?”
Sweetie Belle sighed in dismay, and Scootaloo groaned. “Aw, come on! We totally could have shown that off-” Scootaloo was suddenly aware of Cheerilee, and corrected herself--”showed everypony she could do better at magic.” Cheerilee sighed, and was about to say something, but decided against it. She had things to do.
“Well, I suppose if they’re not going to come back," she began, "school is out.” The CMC cheered, and Cheerilee laughed lightly. “You can go. I’ll need to go reassure all the parents,” she said, a bit irritated.
“Actually,” began Scootaloo. “This peace and quiet without that jerk DT and her cronies is cool. They won’t come back as long as they feeear our evil dark magic.” She laughed, and Cheerilee narrowed her eyes. But her mind was rather muddled from all the confusion, and so she dismissed it.
“Okay then. Have fun! I’ll be back soon.”
As Cheerilee left, Apple Bloom began to cut the apple again, forgetting to remember how she held the knife.[3]
[3]: When the story was told: “She still didn’t hold the knife right.” Rarity fainted. Onto a conveniently placed fainting couch, clearly. "What? A mare needs her fainting couch."
Cheerilee looked back in to make sure Apple Bloom wasn't going to hurt herself, and then trotted off to assure the parents that yes, Apple Bloom had a paring knife, and no, she was not going to kill anypony with it. They would be fine. What could go wrong?
***
Apple Bloom finished the job and handed the slices to her friends evenly. They munched on their lunches thoughtfully as they deliberated what to do next.
“You know,” mumbled Scootaloo, through the lettuce being crunched loudly in her mouth. Sweetie Belle grumbled at Scootaloo’s blatant breach of manners. “I think I kind of liked scaring those bullies like that.”
The other two shifted uncomfortably in their seats. “Well,” began Apple Bloom, after contemplating for a bit. “Ah've gotta admit, the look on Diamond's face was kind of funny.”
Sweetie Belle absent-mindedly held the knife with her magic. “You know, the magic around the knife makes it look kind of spooky!” observed Sweetie Belle, her voice cracking. “It kind of reminds me of Nightmare Moon.” They all had the same thought at once.
“Are you guys thinking what I’m thinking?” asked Scootaloo, with a spreading grin.
Everyone in the town blinked, and a certain schoolteacher's eye began to twitch madly as she felt her foal sense. This could only mean one thing.
“Cutie Mark Crusaders, Rumour Spreaders, YAY!”
Cheerilee raced to the schoolhouse, but the (slightly) sinister foals were already gone.
“Not even 10 minutes?!” came a lone exasperated cry.
The Crusaders sat in their treehouse, bouncing back ideas on what to do to make the completely safe knife look scary. They definitely weren’t going to hurt anyone with it; it was blunt, after all.
“Think, think, think,” Sweetie Belle muttered to herself as she paced around the knife they’d put on a stool.
“Ugh, what can we do?” cried Scootaloo, exasperatedly. “It looks so boring. Nopony’s ever going to be scared of that dumb thing.”
“Looks…” Sweetie muttered in response. “Looks… Looks! A colour changing spell! We can make it look dark and creepy even without my magic!”
“You kin make it as dark and creepy as you want,” interjected Apple Bloom, skeptically. “But it’s still not like anypony’s gonna be scared of some blunt old paring knife.”
Sweetie Belle thought about this carefully. “Hmm... Well, we’re going to look at spell books for a colour changing spell anyway, so we're bound to find something there! Come on, let’s go to the library!”
“But-” Before Apple Bloom could even try to lodge her complaint, Sweetie and Scootaloo whisked her away.
Sweetie Belle anxiously flipped through the pages of a spellbook, looking for some sort of spell to suit their purposes. “How am I supposed to find a colour-changing spell in all of these books?” she cried, her voice cracking again.
Apple Bloom spoke up. “Ah’ve never read a spellbook before, but ah have read books, and ah’m pret-ty sure there’s a table a' contents. And an index.”
Scootaloo snerked and Sweetie Belle facehoofed. “Oops... Well, on to the table of contents! Or the index. That’ll be alpha… alphabetically organised.” She quickly flipped to the index, and searched for a colour-changing spell in C. “Here! Perfect!
“Colour Changing spell: Pretty simple. No weird complex runes to think about. Great! Although patterns are pretty hard, it looks like…”
“It’ll look creepier if it’s random,” Scootaloo interjected.
“Good point. Okay then, I think I saw something that might work somewhere else in this thing…” Sweetie flipped through a few more pages. “There! Irrational Fear spell,” she said, proudly. “I can do this one! And make exceptions for you guys, too. Anyone who sees it will have an inexpli- inexplec- Uh, I think that word means unexplainable. An unexplainable and irrational--that means silly--fear of the object.”
Scootaloo grinned. “That one sounds fun.”
Apple Bloom frowned uncertainly. “Ah don’t know… Dont'cha think it's a bit mean?”
“Nah,” replied Scootaloo, coolly. “It’s like an early Nightmare Night prank!”
“Yeah,” the filly in question noted. “And, if I put only a little bit of power into the spell, it won’t be a big fear. Still scary though.”
Apple Bloom perked up at the reassurance. “Okay then, if ya say so!”
“I think I’ve got this memorised. Let’s go!” Her voice cracked again as she closed the book and put it in the shelf (in the wrong place[4]). They all left the library, waving goodbye to Spike, who was maintaining the library.
[4]: Somewhere, Princess Twilight’s hoof shot out and slammed into a wall, denting it. “Ow…”
This time, the fillies went over to Sweetie Belle’s house. The trek back to Sweet Apple Acres was too long, despite their having just walked it a bit ago. But now they were in a hurry.
"Okay," said Sweetie Belle, in her room, the knife out and ready for spells. "Let's start with colour changing. What colours should we go with?”
“Black, obviously,” replied Scootaloo. “Make sure it's all swirly and creepy. Random not-patterns will do that, right?”
“Some blue, too,” Apple Bloom added. “Real dark-like though.”
Sweetie Belle nodded as she began to put together the spell in her mind. “Okay then, here we go…” Her horn glowed black, and the knife’s colours started to warp into a random, but eerie mix of blacks and blues. She mixed in a sort of shadow spell she’d seen somewhere else to make the shadow a bit creepy as well.
She felt something odd mix in with the shadow spell; maybe she had remembered it wrong. She finished the spell and spoke again. “Guys, something weird might have gotten in. Just, uh, concentrate on it, I guess, and see if you feel anything.” Apple Bloom simply looked at it, and Scootaloo narrowed her eyes at it suspiciously.
“Nope, nothing,” supplied Scootaloo.
“Must’a just been you,” Apple Bloom said.
“Huh, I guess it was. I don't feel anything either. Well, time for the irrational fear spell!" Sweetie Belle exclaimed, her voice cracking as her horn lit up. "Stand back.” She began to cast the spell, weaving in exceptions for Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and herself. Suddenly, her horn flashed brightly, and a burst of power flooded into the spell of its own accord. She quickly finished up the spell to figure out what was wrong.
“I think I might have put in too much power,” she said as she finished.
"You think?" asked Scootaloo, indignantly, as she rubbed her eyes. "What was that?"
"Okay, way too much power. But I can't remember what that meant... I'm pretty sure it was fine though."
“Whatever, it doesn't matter,” droned Scootaloo, her mood quickly changing. “Power shmower. If it works, it works.”
Sweetie Belle felt a bit of unease, but decided to dismiss it. The spell wasn't anything hurtful, after all, so too much power wouldn't do anything bad. With that in mind, she perked up again. "Okay then! Let’s go do this!” she exclaimed, and they all left the house to get ready.
Their plan was simple. Get a table in the middle of town while nopony was there, and then put the knife there. Easy, right?
Yeah. No.
“Fifth try, and this still isn't working!” cried Sweetie Belle, as the others panted from exertion. Five times they had tried to push out that table, and five times somepony had come before they could even get out there. They’d tried distractions; those didn't last long enough. They definitely couldn't do it in plain sight. Ponies would figure out where the table had come from quickly enough once the prank started. This was clearly not working.
“This is stupid!” Scootaloo exclaimed, exasperated. “Everypony's getting in our way! Why do they have to make pranks so hard to pull?” Sweetie Belle facehoofed, and Scootaloo frowned.
“Ah wish we could just teleport the dang thing like Princess Twilight can,” complained Apple Bloom. “This'd be so much easier.”
Sweetie Belle's eyes lit up. “That’s perfect! Why didn't I think of it before? Apple Bloom, you're a genius!”
Apple Bloom smiled widely. “Thanks! Just don’t know mah own brain sometimes.” They all laughed awkwardly.
“Apple Bloom, if that was a joke, you probably inherited your sister's bad joke-itis,” droned Scootaloo, bluntly. “Just a hunch.”
“Fine,” Apple Bloom muttered. “Let’s get on with it.”
Sweetie Belle giggled, and her horn lit up, but it was more green than black now. She strained to teleport the table, but nothing happened. “I think that potion wore off…” she said, dejectedly. “How are we supposed to do this now?” Her voice cracked in indignation.
“Another potion!” replied Apple Bloom. “Quick! Let’s get to Zecora! She’ll have the ingredients for a stronger version a' that potion!”
“I don’t know, it’s pretty far…”
“We still got a lot of time in the day, we kin get back before nightfall. Then we kin finish preparing it. Nightfall would be the perfect time anyway.” Sweetie Belle was sufficiently satisfied by the answer, and so off they went through the Everfree, making their way to Zecora in record time. Apple Bloom rushed in first with the knife, and screeched to a stop in front of Zecora, who surprisingly kept calm.
“What brings you to my humble mode?” she began. “I fear what that knife may forebode.” Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo entered at this point. “And your friends have come as well as you. What trouble for yourselves you brew?”
“Oh, no trouble at all, miss Zecora!” exclaimed Apple Bloom. “We’re doing a little prank-” Zecora looked a bit skeptical. “Just a little one. And we need to brew a potion! It’s not dangerous. You have a stronger version of that magic enhancing potion, don’cha? And an aura colour-changing one, too.”
“In this book is what you seek,” Zecora replied. “Open it, and take a peek. I trust that you will keep from harm, any may your prank alarm?” The three of them nodded profusely, and Zecora nodded in return before slightly reluctantly hoofing the book over to Apple Bloom, who started flipping through the pages.
“Here we go!” exclaimed Apple Bloom. “Scootaloo, go get the Meday- Meda- Sweetie Belle?”
Sweetie Belle looked at the book. “Medeis-Paracletus,” she said, quickly. “Violet flower, 7 petals, blue stem.” She took the book from Apple Bloom and listed off a few more ingredients, and then flipped over to the colour-changing spell and listed off those. Apple Bloom started preparing the potion, with the help of Zecora. About halfway through the brewing, Zecora had to step outside to tend to some things, and in that short window of time, Sweetie Belle happened to accidentally dip the knife into the potion. She quickly pulled it out. "Oops!"
Scootaloo looked up. "What?"
"Oh, nothing, just a little mishap. It'll be fine!" Her voice cracked, and Apple Bloom looked at her skeptically, but brushed it off.
Finally, it was finished. Zecora checked it carefully. “Nothing harmful can I see, so drink it now to this degree.” She poured a precise amount of the potion into a vial, and gave it to Sweetie Belle to drink. She drank it slowly, following her sister’s advice about lady-like manners.
“Just get on with it,” said Scootaloo, exasperatedly[5]. Sweetie Belle sighed and gulped it all down quickly.[6]
[5]: Somewhere else, Rarity slammed a hoof into a wall. The subsequent wail of despair was heard through Ponyville. “My hooficure!”
[6]: When the story was told: “The. Worst. Possible. Thing!”
“Did it work?” asked Apple Bloom, and Sweetie nodded.
“I can feel a lot more magic!” They all grinned, thanked Zecora, and rushed out before she could say a word. Zecora shook her head in wonder.
“Perhaps this time will no trouble be caused,” she said to herself, and then chuckled. “Or more likely it is that my judgement has paused.” When they were all together, they were bound to cause trouble, without fail. She offered a silent prayer that Ponyville would be at least somewhat spared.
The Cutie Mark Crusaders were hiding in an alley, with the night approaching. They were waiting for an opportunity, when there were no ponies around to witness any sign of magic from Sweetie Belle. All the foals knew of her different aura, so if any saw, the Crusaders would be quickly found out. Scootaloo was watching for ponies, trying to find an opening, while Apple Bloom helped Sweetie prepare for a quick, inconspicuous teleportation of the table, which Sweetie Belle had also ended up enchanting with the eerie colours and shadow.
Scootaloo herself was starting to think that this prank would be kind of lame. Why would anypony be scared of a dumb knife? Weird spell or no, it was still pretty boring. She didn't think the colours were too "spooky" either. She sighed, finally speaking up. "Are you sure this is going to work? This is starting to feel kinda lame."
Apple Bloom frowned. "We went through all that trouble, and now you're callin' it lame?" she asked, incredulously. "Let's jus' try it. Maybe we kin learn from it an' make it better for Nightmare Night. Or at least git an idea o' what scares ponies." Sweetie Belle nodded absent-mindedly, and Scootaloo thought about what Apple Bloom said.
"Oh, fine," she said. "It's not like anypony will know it was us if it turns out to be stupid." She looked back out, and to her surprise, there were no ponies. "Go, do it now!" she quietly yelled, and Sweetie Belle immediately fired up the spell, sending the knife and table out into the middle of town square.
"Just in time," Sweetie Belle said, as she looked out to see a pony approaching as darkness finally draped over the land. Thankfully, it didn't seem that he'd noticed. He came across the table, and upon seeing the knife, he yelped, turned tail, and ran, screaming something about a "Mister Hooffums." Scootaloo snickered, but kept it from turning into a full blown laugh.
"Okay, so maybe it's not as lame as I thought," she said, calming herself down. She quickly put on an impassive face. "Um, I mean, whatever, still lame." Apple Bloom chuckled, and they all watched as more ponies began to come across the enchanted object, each with their own hilarious display. Sweetie Belle sent out Apple Bloom to covertly find out how ponies were reacting behind their reach. As Apple Bloom searched, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo continued to watch, the latter revelling in the scare the prank was giving the ponies. More were starting to come out of curiosity, as rumours had started spreading about the knife. Eventually, Apple Bloom returned with what she had found out.
"Well, it looks like they're callin' it the 'Nightmare Paring Knife,'" she said, laughing lightly. "It's kinda weird that they know it's a paring knife, even though they're still scared of it."
"It's not called the Irrational Fear spell for nothing!" Sweetie Belle said, her voice cracking, and she giggled.
"Hey, look, here comes Miss Cheerilee!" exclaimed Scootaloo, and then she gulped. "She probably knows that we were doing something; what if she figures it out?" These fears were quickly rectified, as Cheerilee came upon the knife, stared at it, and then simply collapsed in exhaustion, passing out on the ground. She was definitely going to quit this time.[7]
[7]: She didn't.
"Crisis averted," said Sweetie Belle, grinning. "I wonder when Diamond Tiara's going to get here." They all grinned this time. Finally, some payback, and Diamond couldn't get hurt like she could the last time they tried.
"Speak o' Tartarus, here she comes!" Apple Bloom exclaimed, and they all watched in excitement. She looked at the knife, and then froze.
She started spluttering, her eyes growing wide with terror. "My imaginary friends, they were right! It's the end of the world! Mr. McMeany!!" she screamed, in actual abject terror, and dashed off, flailing her legs about wildly.
The three paused for a few moments, the silence blanketing over the town as they stared, processing what had just happened. Sweetie Belle cast a sound-proof spell just in time, and then they all fell over, laughing like mad.[8]
[8]: Her subconscious also saved her and her friends from a terrible fate of uncleanliness by casting a quick cleaning spell behind her back. It was an alleyway.
"Okay," cried Scootaloo, between laughs. "This prank is definitely out of the lameness zone... I am never going to let DT live that down..." They all sighed happily as the laughter died down.
Sweetie Belle stood up, the others following suit, and she peeked out of the alleyway again to watch for other ponies. "I wonder who'll be next," she mused, as she watched the streets for other ponies.
Apple Bloom started to look a little uneasy, as she caught a glimpse of Twilight Sparkle and friends approaching. "Ah think we forgot about the Elements," she said, nerves creeping up her spine.
"Aw, it'll be fine," said Scootaloo. "Rainbow loves a good prank, and it's not hurting anypony. We'll be fine." Apple Bloom wasn't so sure, but Sweetie Belle was reassured by the statement.
"So," began Applejack. "What're we lookin' at again?" she asked. "What's all the fuss about?"
"There are rumours circulating the town of some 'Nightmare Paring Knife,'" Twilight responded. "Everypony seems to be irrationally scared of it."
"Um..." whispered Fluttershy. "If everypony's so scared of it, maybe we shouldn't go look at it?"
Pinkie Pie giggled. "It'll be fine, Fluttershy! Remember, giggle at the ghosties!" Fluttershy appeared heartened at this, and so they continued. They came across the knife, and immediately upon seeing it, Fluttershy eeped and hid behind the others.
Rarity gasped in horror. "It's a crime against fashion! Just look at it!" She drew a hoof over her face over-dramatically.
"See, nothing to be afraid of!" exclaimed Rainbow Dash, patting Fluttershy. Fluttershy looked up slowly and eyed the knife, and then came closer to it. Rarity stepped closer to it with Fluttershy, the former looking closely at it to encourage the latter.
But then as the knife really got into focus, they both suddenly screamed out of some innate fear of the knife and shrank back, their eyes wide with terror. Twilight was genuinely confused. "But, just a moment ago..." she murmured, her voice trailing off as she examined the knife closely. Rainbow Dash and Applejack did the same, eyeing it menacingly, but nothing at all happened.
"Ah don't know what's got y'all so scared," Applejack said, turning around and looking at the two cowering mares. "It's just a plain ol' blunt parin' knife. Nothin' ta worry about."
"But- But-" Rarity stuttered as she tried to figure out how exactly it was scaring her. "It's so... So scary!" she cried, and both she and Fluttershy began to bawl.
Rainbow and Twilight turned toward the two terrified mares, and Twilight frowned. "They don't seem to have a reason," she said, jotting down mental notes. "They just seem to fear it. The knife evokes some sort of fear on sight." A notepad and quill appeared as she started writing down her observation. "Closer look evokes stronger fear. Subjects seem not to know why they fear the knife." She thought for a bit. "Rarity?" she asked, as the mare in question calmed down enough to speak coherently. "Is the knife very sharp at all?"
Rarity shook her head.
"Is the colour very scary?"
Rarity shook her head again.
"Is... Is the table scary?" Same response. "So it's the knife." A nod. "Just the knife." Both nodded vehemently. "What about the knife?" As soon as they started contemplating this, they broke out into crying again.
The Crusaders watched this from the alleyway curiously. "Wow, that Irrational Fear spell is really doing its job," said Sweetie Belle. "But the others aren't scared... What if Twilight figures it out?"
Scootaloo and Apple Bloom frowned. "Well, make it scarier!" exclaimed Scootaloo. "Levitate it or something! Maybe they'll think it's alive or whatever." Sweetie Belle nodded and her horn glowed with a black aura, which surrounded the knife and caused it to float up before Applejack and Rainbow Dash, whose eyes went wide.
"Uh, Twi?" asked Rainbow, as she began backing away, fear starting to grow. But neither she nor Applejack could take their eyes off of it, the terror becoming increasingly evident on their face.
"Not now!" exclaimed Twilight, not bothering to look. "I'm busy."
"Twi!" yelled Applejack, fear filling her voice. Twilight snapped her head around.
"What is it-" She shut up when she saw how scared Applejack and Rainbow Dash were. "Girls, what's wrong?" she asked, as she looked at the floating knife. She was mildly surprised, and jotted down more notes, but didn't seem scared in the slightest. "So they have it too. Okay then. Knife blanketed in black aura, effect stronger on ponies who resisted before." Then her mind finally clicked on what was happening. "Rainbow Dash, Applejack, snap out of it! What's happening to you?!" she exclaimed, unnerved by their fear. Pinkie Pie shook them madly.
"Helloooo?" she asked, giggling. "Anypony in there?" She poked and prodded them.
"Okay, this is bad. This is extremely very not good. Why are you four so scared of it? It's just a normal knife!" She whirled around to look at the still floating knife, completely unfazed.
"Ah know what we should do," said Apple Bloom, as they watched the events unfolding. "Sweetie Belle, d' ya know any voice changing spells?"
Sweetie Belle's eyes widened as she realised what Apple Bloom was insinuating. "I know just the thing! But what are we going to say?" she asked, thinking.
Scootaloo grinned. "Something like..." She explained her idea of what they could do with the spell to her fellow Crusaders, and they all nodded as she finished.
"Okay, let's do this!" said Sweetie Belle, her voice cracking, once Pinkie Pie and Twilight were both looking at the knife.
Suddenly, the knife whizzed off and impaled a fruit in a grocery stand, bringing it back. "We are the Nightmare Paring Knife," said a deep chorus of what seemed like countless voices coming from the knife, although it was really just the three Crusaders, their voices echoed numerous times to give the illusion of more voices than there really were. "We have come..." There was a pause, as fear began to creep up Twilight and Pinkie's spine. "To slice all your fruit!" The knife quickly and smoothly cut the fruit into multiple even slices before the two mares still thinking coherently[9] could even register what happened.
[9]: As if Pinkie's thoughts could be considered coherent.
The two stared in disbelief. "Uh, and then kill you all!" A third of the voices from the knife seemed to crack, but it did the trick. Pinkie Pie squealed, actually genuinely scared of the knife, and Twilight was just as scared as the others, although she was still able to think clearly.
"This... This is evil," murmured Twilight, terror clear in her voice. The small still rational part of her brain was screaming, 'That is the least evil thing ever!' but she wasn't listening. It was also too busy screaming at her to figure out who was clearly responsible for this.
"Yes," echoed the knife. "We are the most evil thing ever! Muahahaha!" A third of the voices cracked again during the evil laugh, and it was rather asynchronous, but nopony noticed. They were too busy being terrified.
"I know what we need!" exclaimed Twilight, suddenly. "The Elements of Harmony!"
"Wait, what?" said only one third of the voices coming from the knife. "I mean," it corrected, with all of them. "Wait, what?"
"You're a Nightmare! And Nightmares can be fixed with the Elements of Harmony! It's perfect!" She had no concern for the facts that, 1. The Elements were in the Tree, probably very stuck, and 2. If they could get them out, that would probably trigger the Plunder Seeds and release doom upon Equestria. That's what the still rational part of her mind would have been screaming about, if it weren't too preoccupied with screaming about the non-evilness of the knife. The rationality of this part of the mind was drifting further and further into question.
Sweetie Belle stopped the sound spell so that they could converse. "Uh," said Apple Bloom, with more than a hint unease.
"Oops?" finished Scootaloo.
"This is bad, this is very bad, this is very absolutely incredibly extremely not good," Sweetie Belle muttered, taking Twilight's statement and adding a few more words just to adequately express how not good the situation was.
"Sweetie Belle, ah think this 's gone a mite too far," said Apple Bloom, deadpan. "Don't that Tree o' Harmony need the Elements to keep all those weird vine things from eating up Equestria?"
"More importantly, why do they think they need the Elements of Harmony?!" cried Scootaloo, worriedly.
Sweetie Belle gulped as she thought back to when she had originally cast the spell, and tried to remember how she had cast it. "Um... I just remembered what the side effect of too much power was... It makes the fear really, really irrational and makes the ponies want to take drastic measures to get rid of it. Also I accidentally mixed in a spell that would make the knife protect itself in any way it could when I did the shadow spell," she said, very quickly.
Scootaloo and Apple Bloom facehoofed. "Now what're we supposed ta do?" asked Apple Bloom, extremely unnerved.
"I can get rid of all the spells! I'm more powerful now than when I cast the spells, I should be able to negate them!" she exclaimed, the unease disappearing.
"Well, do it fast, because Twilight's already getting ready to drag her friends to the Everfree!" Scootaloo warned, and Sweetie Belle was naught to protest. She fired up her horn, and tried to negate the spells...
And nothing happened. Actually, something did happen. The six friends in front of the table became visibly more afraid, and Twilight became much more frantic. "... Remember what I said about the knife protecting itself?" The other two nodded, their unease growing. "Well, I think it just drew all the power out of my spell and made itself more powerful." They all swallowed nervously. "The exceptions are still holding, though."
Apple Bloom perked up as she thought of something. "Hey! Maybe those exceptions will pass on to Twilight and friends if'n we go over there and try and get them ta stop!"
Sweetie Belle frowned. "Hmm... Maybe..." Before she could think any more about it, the other two Crusaders quickly jumped at the idea, and dragged Sweetie Belle out with them to get over to Twilight.
"Twilight!" exclaimed Scootaloo, quickly. "You only fear the knife because there's some kind of weird irarrtional fear spell on it to make you fear it!"
"Yeah!" added Apple Bloom. "Nothin' ta worry about! No need fer any Elements or anything like that!" They all chuckled nervously at them.
Twilight stared at them. "... I don't believe you," she said, simply.
"But- But-" stammered Scootaloo and Apple Bloom, in unison.
"I can prove it!" Sweetie Belle's voice cracked, and her horn lit up. "See? Black aura!" Then she levitated the knife again, in the same way as before. "Black aura around the knife! And I did a sound spell!" She started up the spell again and the three Crusaders said the name of the knife like before, deeply and with hundreds of echoes behind it. "There's a colour spell too!"
Twilight frowned, thinking about this. "Hmm..."
Pinkie lit up, literally. "Are you sure the knife isn't controlling you? Huh? Huh? Ooooh! Spooky!"
Twilight nodded at this. "Yes, girls. After all, Sweetie Belle, you're only just learning levitation, aren't you? Your magic isn't as strong as it would have to be to do all those spells."
Sweetie frowned. "Well, my magic is a lot stronger-"
Before she could explain why, Twilight interrupted her. "Ha!" she exclaimed. "The knife is giving you that power! Obviously."
Sweetie Belle tried to speak. "But Apple Bl-"
Rarity shushed her. "Twilight is trying to speak, dear. Now listen to her so I can go back to being terrified." With that, her eyes widened and terror fell back over her features.
"That's new," droned Scootaloo.
"Since the knife is clearly using you to accomplish its evil plans, we'll have to keep you from leaving here," explained Twilight.
"D' ya think we should leave?"
"Well, that escalated quickly," said Scootaloo, before Sweetie belle teleported the three far away from there.
"Okay, we need to get to Spike and have him send a letter to Celestia!" she exclaimed, frantically.
"Let's hurry up then!" Scootaloo looked around. "Uh... Why is the castle way over there?" She pointed a hoof to the castle.
Sweetie Belle's mind registered where they were at this point. "Er... We're at the other side of town?" Her voice cracked in nervousness. The other two crusaders groaned.
"Le's jus' go," said Apple Bloom, exasperatedly. "We need to git there fast!"
"Follow me!" exclaimed Sweetie Belle, and they all began a mad dash to get to the library while avoiding Twilight and her friends. Thankfully, the six were busy preparing to get to the Elements, and so they didn't have any encounters. They rushed into the castle and called for Spike.
"I'm right here," said Spike, walking toward them. "What's happening?"
"Twilight panicking... Nightmare Paring Knife... Out to get us..." Sweetie Belle panted from the exertion of galloping to the castle from the outskirts of town without breaks.
Spike frowned as he heard 'Twilight panicking.' "Follow me." He quickly led them to the throne room, where he opened up a drawer under his throne. "What class of panic? Mass spell, cuckoo, rage mode, or Elements of Harmony?"
"Elements of Harmony," the Crusaders chorused.
Spike grimaced. "Ooh, that's not good." He whipped out a scroll and sent it off to Celestia.
"What was that?" asked Apple Bloom. "Don'cha need ta write something?"
"I have form letters ready to send for all kinds of Twilight situations! When you live with her, you need them." He chuckled. "I do need to send the details while she gets here. So, what's happening?"
"We were playing an early Nightmare Night prank on the town," Sweetie Belle began. "We made a blunt paring knife look creepy and put an irrational fear spell on it and accidentally put on a spell that would make it protect itself in any way it could. The spell was too strong and so it makes ponies want to take drastic measures to get rid of it, and now Twilight wants to get the Elements of Harmony and use them on the knife!"
"Couldn't you have just stopped the spells?" asked Spike, as he wrote the information down on a scroll.
"I tried, but the knife just used my power to make itself stronger."
Spike nodded. "That's not good at all. Okay, I'm sending off the letter. Nothing else you need to add?" The Crusaders shook their heads. "Okay then." Spike sent the letter off and they all rushed out to look for Celestia.
Twilight and the others were galloping past the castle as Celestia came down. "Twilight Spark-" She was cut off as Twilight created a magic inhibiting cage around Celestia without a second thought, and she and her friends ran off the scene. Celestia's jaw dropped, and Spike and the Crusaders quickly made their way to Celestia as the shock wore off.
"Princess Celestia, are you okay?" asked Apple Bloom, worriedly.
"Yes, I am okay," the princess said. "You need not worry. Although it seems my dear Twilight has placed a magic inhibiting spell on the cage. It will take some work to unravel it."
"No worries!" exclaimed Sweetie Belle, and teleported Celestia out, her magic still quite strong. The cage only stopped magic on the inside, not the outside. "Apple Bloom mixed a potion to make my magic stronger!"
Celestia smiled. "That's very interesting. Is that how you cast all of those spells?" Sweetie Belle nodded profusely, overjoyed to be in the presence of Princess Celestia.
"When can we get to saving the world?" asked Scootaloo, and the other two Crusaders glared at her. Spike looked horrified. She didn't budge, and Celestia put a hoof to her mouth to hide a laugh.
"Fine, whatever," mumbled Sweetie Belle, annoyed. "Princess Celestia, do you think you could help me unravel the spell? If we get rid of it, it'll probably stop Twilight from trying to get the Elements of Harmony! It just sucks up my power, and I don't know how to get around that. I'm sure you do, though!" Sweetie Belle beamed.
Celestia nodded. "I will be able to see the whole spell, something that you will be taught later on."
Sweetie Belle frowned. "Could you teach me?" she asked, suddenly.
"Sweetie Belle, we don't have time fer that!" exclaimed Apple Bloom.
"Yeah, we need to get that spell unravelled before Twilight can get to the Elements!" added Scootaloo, exasperatedly.
"Do not fret, my little ponies," began Celestia, a comforting air and smile around her.
Spike was about to speak, but Scootaloo stopped him. "Yes, we know what fret means." She then turned to Sweetie Belle and, obliviously, loudly whispered, "What does fret mean?" earning a collective facehoof (and claw) from Spike and the Crusaders.
"It means worry," Spike droned.
Celestia smiled. "Yes, don't worry. I will send Luna and Discord to stop them." She expected to see signs of Discord's chaos from where they would unravel the spell.
"Why not just one?" asked Scootaloo, frowning.
"Have you seen Twilight when she's panicking?" droned Spike.
"You have a point," replied Scootaloo. Celestia laughed lightly, not hiding it this time.
"They will keep Twilight and her friends occupied as we unravel the spell," said Celestia. "Now, let's go. Lead the way." Sweetie Belle pranced off ecstatically, and they all followed quickly after. She knew things had to be sped along. Luna and Discord would definitely keep the Bearers from getting anywhere for a formidable amount of time. Hopefully. But it wouldn't be forever. She couldn't imagine what sort of shenanigans the two would be up to, though.
Luna set down in front of Twilight, and her voice boomed with the Royal Canterlot Voice. "Twilight Sparkle, you will stop this instant!"
"What in tarnation?" asked Applejack, surprised at Luna's appearance. She had a fishbowl for a head, and there was an orange and very cross fish speaking. Discord, with a tall, red-and-white-striped hat and a red bowtie, floated down under an umbrella with the same colour scheme.
"The Discord in the Hat," he hummed, and then stopped. "Oh, I'm terribly sorry! Wrong story, my mistake." He snapped his fingers and Luna's head returned to normal. The not-a-fish Princess glared at him.
Before they came into view of the knife, Apple Bloom stopped them. "Wait, won't the Fear spell affect you, Princess?" she asked, uneasily. "And Spike, too."
"I have a mental spell block against the Irrational Fear spell and others like it," replied Celestia, and then she looked at Spike. "Dragons are naturally resistant to tampering with the mind."
Spike nodded. "When Twilight found out, she didn't let me out of the basement for hours. You have no idea how uncomfortable her metal helmet thing is until you've had it sticking needles in your head so it can probe your mind." The Crusaders grimaced, save Scootaloo, who was busy imagining Twilight as an alien.
"So that's settled," said Sweetie Belle, and she led them into the clearing, where they gathered around the knife, which was happily lying on the table and doing nothing. Sweetie picked up the knife and looked over it. "I know a lot about magic; Twilight teaches me about it. But I've never had enough power to do anything with it. Now I do though! It'll wear off in a few hours, though." She frowned sadly. "But we can always make another potion."
"Do you know about the three-rune system of spell-casting?" asked Celestia. If she knew this, this would become much easier.
"Oh, yes!" Sweetie Belle beamed, ready to share her knowledge. "A spell at its root is composed of three runes," she began to recite. "Each rune represents some kind of concept. The first rune is like a beam of coloured light, and it decides the basis of what the spell will do!"
"That is correct," said Celestia, stopping her. "It is the simplest part of the spell. Finding out this rune is quite easy. Just concentrate on the spell with your magic, and think about what the basic concept of the spell might be. The rune will show itself to you at that point."
"Really? Cool!" Her horn lit up and she concentrated on the knife, narrowing her eyes and trying to think of what the basis of the spell would be. Darkness? Confusion? Fear.. "Fear!" she exclaimed.
"Very good, my little pony." Celestia smiled proudly. "The first rune in this spell is Fear." Scootaloo was thoroughly confused at this, but Apple Bloom was interested, and tried her best to understand it. "What is the second rune like?"
"Um..." Sweetie Belle thought hard. "Oh, I remember! It's like a gem with many... What was that word... Facets! It takes the light and splits into lots of other beams and colours that look a bit different! All those other beams of light clarify what the spell is made of and how it works!"
"You know much about this. Is Twilight a good teacher?"
All the Crusaders nodded profusely. "She knows a lot of stuff, and she's really good at teaching it to us!" exclaimed Scootaloo.
"Darn tootin' she is!" added Apple Bloom. "She don't know as much about potions as Zecora does, but she's teaching me the more science-y aspects of it!"
"Scientific," corrected Sweetie Belle.
"There are lots of words that matter with potions, but that ain't one of them," droned Apple Bloom. Sweetie Belle sighed.
"It is good that you are all learning much. I taught Twilight well, and my expectations have not been let down." Celestia would have to commend Twilight on this, when everything had blown over. She would also have to puzzle out the matter of Sweetie Belle's exceptionally low power levels. She should have been able to do so much more. "Now, on the matter of learning the second rune: this is more complicated and less intuitive. This is not simply a matter of thinking about words wantonly, but requires intricacy. Extend your magic onto the knife yet again, and think about the first rune, Fear." Sweetie Belle did so, feeling the spell on the knife and putting the concept of Fear in her mind.
"Now, the second rune will be composed of branches of the first rune." Certainly, when there were parts of the spell unrelated to the "trunk", there would be some sort of external branch, twirling around the branch in the spell it was most connected to. And then there was the fact that sometimes, even those most basic concepts of the first runes would have roots of their own. But those were complicated, and Sweetie Belle wasn't ready for that yet. "Imagine splitting up the rune of Fear like a fabric, into many threads of different colours. The spell will naturally provide you with the correct number of threads, but you will need to thoroughly examine the threads to learn what they represent. As you practise, this will become faster and easier to do."
"If it takes so long, why are we doing this?" asked Scootaloo, annoyed, and worried. "We're running out of time, I just know it!"
"Patience, my little pony," replied Celestia, comfortingly. "Have faith in my sister's and Discord's abilities."
"Well, he is Discord," added Apple Bloom.
"And we all know how he is," Spike Interjected. He and the Crusaders, minus Sweetie Belle, shared a laugh. Sweetie Belle was deep in her work.
Meanwhile, Discord was spinning a wheel as Twilight and her friends were involuntarily playing a game of four-dimensional Twister, in a stadium filled with countless Lunas and Discords, cheering them on.
"We are mildly amused," said the real Luna, on one of four thrones. The other three were occupied by three Discords. The first had blotchy white paint spots all over him and a poorly rendered wig of Celestia's mane. She had a sign that said "Sunbutt." The other two Discords were much the same, but were attempting to reproduce Cadence and Twilight, with signs "Lovebutt" and "The smiler and waver" respectively.
Finally, Sweetie Belle finished drawing out the meaning of the various branches of the spell. "Okay, I'm done," she said, as her horn shut off. "It's got lots of them, like Confusion and Mind and Darkness and a bunch of other stuff."
The shock was evident on the faces of Celestia and Spike. "You picked that up real fast," said Spike[10]. "Almost nopony ever gets it on the first try."
[10]: At such a blatant error, Twilight slammed a hoof into one of the pads, inadvertently stopping the game. "Ow... Again... Hey look!" Luna was very much not amused.
"You are an even faster learner than I previously thought," said the princess, smiling. "Which reminds me, your power level really should not be this low at this age."
"Twilight's tried to figure it out before, but she always failed," Sweetie Belle replied, frowning sadly. This was definitely something Celestia would have to study about the filly. But for now, her focus was unravelling this spell. She retrieved the parts of the second rune, helped in part by her knowledge of the usual version of this spell.
"This second rune contains most of the details of the spell," Celestia explained. "What about the third rune?"
Sweetie Belle thought for a bit, readying something to say. "The third rune is the director of the spell!" she exclaimed, smiling widely at her remembrance. "It specifies what the spell will be cast upon, how it will respond to other ponies or creatures or other things, and any specifics about certain ponies! It applies the branches of the second rune in the different ways! Like in this spell, it would probably have something for applying Confusion and some of the other branches to any creatures by sight! And it'd have stuff for exceptions, too."
"That's spot on," Celestia replied, happily. Sweetie Belle really was a rather smart foal. "And, like the other two runes, the nature of this category is heavily echoed in how you find the third rune. Place your magic over the spell again, and call to mind the first and second runes once again." Sweetie Belle did so, subconsciously sorting them into place with each other, and she began to actually feel the essence of the spell.
"Woah! What is that?" asked Sweetie Belle, surprised.
"Ah, I see you are feeling the spell." Celestia kept her growing concern out of her voice. "When you think about the runes and begin to put them into their proper places in your mind, the spell will begin to open itself up to you more, and you will feel the essence of it. This is vital to finding out the third rune. I had expected to have to teach you how to do this, but I believe your mind, much like Twilight's did, has sorted it out on its own. You will, of course, need to learn to consciously do this."
Sweetie Belle nodded. "This feels so weird! But in a good way!" Her voice cracked and she giggled from the feeling of the spell. "It kinda feels like how a fear spell should feel..." she mused.
"Exactly. It is the essence of the spell, revealed to you by the first and second runes. Now that you have this feeling about you, try to visualise it, as a sort of mist."
Sweetie Belle was surprised yet again. "I can actually see it! It has my black magic colour."
"The spell's essence takes the colour of the caster--at the time of casting, of course." Now, try to feel through the essence with your magic."
"It's kind of like you're probing with your hoof, but with magic," added Spike, helpfully. "That's what Twilight said when we were little."
"As you feel through the spell, try to pick out strands coming out from the centre of the spell; in this case, that would be the knife." Sure enough, little white strands began to pop into Sweetie's vision, connecting to different ponies, like Apple Bloom and Scootaloo, but not Celestia or Spike. The spell wasn't doing anything to them. Sweetie Belle's eyes filled with wonder, and Celestia took that as Sweetie Belle being able to see the strands. "These strands are the connections of the spell, and they are what make up the third rune." As Celestia spoke, she herself began to do what she had taught Sweetie Belle to do, assembling the spell in her mind at a veritable pace.
"There are six really strong ones right here!" she exclaimed, pointing to those which she was talking about. She could feel Celestia's presence, and she somehow knew that Celestia could see what she could. She didn't end up thinking about it too much, her filly mind being too focused on wonderment about what she was seeing.
Scootaloo and Apple Bloom were confused. "What're ya pointin' at?" asked Apple Bloom, confusion clearly in her voice.
"Yeah, I don't see anything!" Scootaloo added.
"You won't see it," Spike explained, for Celestia and Sweetie Belle. "You don't have magic," he finished, bluntly. The two fillies frowned.
"Now ah wish ah had magic," said Apple Bloom, dejectedly.
Celestia looked at Spike. "Now, Spike," she said, some condescension in her voice. "All races can do the magic that you see as 'unicorn magic'. Earth ponies, pegasi, and unicorns. And dragons, and gryphons, and zebras."
"What?" Spike and all of the Crusaders asked, incredulously.
"You never told me this!" exclaimed Spike, deeply disappointed.
"I didn't?" asked Celestia, confusedly. "I'm sure I did... It must have slipped my mind, Spike, and for that I am sorry."
The three young fillies were about to open the floodgates for a lake of questions, but Celestia raised a hoof. "I'm sure you have many questions, but they will be answered later. Time is of the essence." They all sighed collectively. "On the topic of the spell," the princess began again, and she and Sweetie Belle turned their attention back to the mist around the knife, and the strands running throughout the air.
"In order to unravel the spell, we must work backwards, from the third rune. You must first sever all of the ties that the spell has to the ponies and objects around it. This takes precision in order to cut the threads with your magic--" She was interrupted as threads started falling and dissipating around her.
"This is fun!" exclaimed Sweetie Belle, giggling as she snipped threads left and right.
"How are you- You can't- Not at this age level..." Celestia stammered, her calm and collected demeanour temporarily falling apart.
"You know Rarity's a seamstress! I have lots of practise cutting threads just so!"
Celestia was surprised. "That's very interesting." That, it seemed, would be very good for teaching how to cut the strands. She would have to effect this in the curriculum for schools quickly. This was much easier than the original method. Get the foals practising with cutting threads with scissors, and when it came time for this, it would be intuitive.
Sweetie Belle had nearly finished cutting all the ties, and a complaint snapped Celestia back to reality. "I can't cut these strands!" she exclaimed, pointing to the six most powerful ones. "And those are the ones for Twilight and her friends!"
"That's odd..." Celestia mused, and she herself tried to cut them. Try at she might, to her great consternation, the strands refused to budge. She had never come across ties she could not cut, and these weren't nearly as strong as the strongest. She felt her magic around the strands, and she felt something odd, something she had not felt in a long time. "What...?"
"What's wrong?" asked Scootaloo. "Why can't you cut them?"
"I don't know," Celestia said, her voice far off. She shook herself, and, determined to disprove what she obviously was imagining, felt some of the dissipating strands, and realised that they, too, had the same feel. They had been weak enough to cut, though, and that was fine. "But how can it be there?" she thought aloud.
"How can what be there?" asked Sweetie Belle. Celestia was about to answer, when Luna teleported in front of them.
"My sister, wherefore dost thou take such a time to unravel the spell? The Elements have escaped our clutches, and are nearing the Tree! What art thou doing?"
"It's.. The spell is... Mother..." Luna immediately understood, and her eyes widened.
"Uh, what are you two talking about?" asked Spike, as they grew impatient.
"It is a matter of the utmost importance," replied Celestia.
"So are Twilight and her friends!" Scootaloo exclaimed, exasperatedly.
"But..." Luna was extremely shaken. "Nopony has ever been in possession since..."
"What are you talking about?!" shouted Sweetie Belle, her voice cracking. "We need to go right now!"
"Thou art correct," said Luna, shaking herself. "If we cannot then break thy ties, we must needs shake the Elements from thy spell before they can effect great damage. Come, sister, let us go."
"Sweetie Belle, bring the knife," Celestia added, and Sweetie Belle picked it up before they all teleported away. Discord was thumping a pillow over the head of Rarity, whose horn simply speared the pillow.
Discord dramatically put his lion's paw to his head. "Oh, I have tried everything to stop them, my dearest Princesses," he said, with a powdered wig and a sad-face mask. "But alas, nothing has worked! They just keep going!"
Scootaloo deadpanned. "Discord, you can do better than that."
Discord fell apart. Literally. "Exasperated sigh," he sighed, his voice disembodied. A bobblehead copy of him reassembled his puzzle pieces and he came out of the finished piece with a white face and a beret, placing his hands on an invisible wall. His claw and paw tied together and he had a pouting face, which turned into excitement as they heard crowds cheering from nowhere.
"This is no time for games," said Celestia, firmly, and Discord and the sounds returned to normal.
"Fine," he droned in a bored manner. "And yes, I can do better, but oh, what suspense! Will you make it in time? Will the secret be revealed? Will Sweetie Belle ever get her cutie mark?" As he spoke, the scene turned into the set of a poorly made commercial. "Find all this out and more in the next-"
"Discord!" Luna boomed, in the Royal Canterlot Voice. "Stop this instant!"
Discord stopped talking. "Fine, I'll stop helping you," he said, smirking. "Suit yourself."
"Wait!" they all exclaimed, but he was gone.
"There goes Discord," said Apple Bloom, swiping her hoof across the ground frustratedly. "Dang it."
"Let's just go," said Spike. "We're close to the Tree now; if we don't stop them in time, who knows what'll happen?"
Celestia nodded. "You are right. We have to hurry. The influence of the Elements will be stronger the closer they get." With that, she and Luna teleported them in front of Twilight and her friends and raised a dome barrier around them.
"What are you doing, Princess?!" Twilight cried, sending a blast of magic at the barrier but failing to break it. "We need to get the Elements of Harmony and defeat the Nightmare Paring Knife!"
"Twilight, thou hast been deceived," replied Luna. "This 'Nightmare Paring Knife' thou speakest of is but a simple knife, enchanted to place this fear upon thee. Shake thyself of thy delusion!"
"It's not a delusion!" Rainbow Dash responded. "This is real! Didn't you see that thing?" She shuddered. "Or... Maybe you're being controlled by it too!"
"We are not controlled by any lowly kitchen accessory," Luna said, indignantly. "You are they who art controlled!" But the six refused to believe that.
"Maybe now that we're closer, we'll be able to cut the ties," said Sweetie Belle. "Come on, Princess, let's try again!" She focused her magic on the spell, seeing the thread and trying to cut through it, with no avail.
"It will be of no use, my little pony," said Celestia, dejectedly. "That spell is strong, too strong. Neither of us can shake it off of them, or cut it apart. Nopony holds that power. Something you did when creating the spell has changed it into something only one pony has ever been able to use." The Crusaders and Spike were very confused.
"But I thought you said everypony has magic!" Scootaloo interjected, suddenly, without thinking.
"Scootaloo, that don't mean there ain't kinds that nopony does," Apple Bloom replied, deadpan.
"Oh..."
"Sister, do not lose hope," said Luna, frowning. "At least let the filly try, lest we lose the Elements forever."
"Try what?!"
"What if she can't?" asked Celestia.
"We shall find our answer if she fails! But hurry; they are breaking through!" Sure enough, Twilight's repeated blasts of magic were making a crack in the barrier.
"What do you want me to do?!" cried Sweetie Belle, her voice cracking. "Just tell me already!"
Celestia hesitated for a moment, and then her shaky, cracking calmness fell apart. "Sing, Sweetie Belle, sing!" she exclaimed.
"But I'm a terrible singer!"
"Wha?" asked Spike. "You're a great singer!"
"I am?" asked Sweetie Belle, confused.
"Yes, yes you are!" shouted Scootaloo, quickly, finally realising their mistake during the talent show all that time ago. "Now do what she's asking before they break out!"
"Sweetie Belle, feel the strands we can't break, and sing," said Celestia, shaking, as he tried to push long-buried memories out of her head.
"Sing what?!"
"Anything!" replied Luna. "Thou wilt know!"
"But-" Sweetie Belle had no idea what to sing. Sing anything? That's was no help at all! She paused, for seconds that seemed like an eternity.
"Jus' do it!" cried Apple Bloom, breaking Sweetie Belle out of her mind.
She didn't hesitate. She drew her magic around the threads, and sang. She let out a crisp, clear note of vocalisation that instantly quieted the forest and the commotion from its beauty. Suddenly, she knew exactly what notes to sing, and she did so, creating a beautiful melody that resonated throughout the forest. Visible green swirls began to dance around the invisible threads, straining and shaking them. Celestia could feel the spell unravelling around her. With one final, perfect note, the spell shattered, and Twilight and her friends woke up in various states of confusion.
"What in tarnation just happened?" asked Applejack, rubbing her forehead as she adjusted to the light.
"My goodness gracious, I'm filthy!" exclaimed Rarity, in despair. "Of all the worst things that could happen, this is the! Worst! Possible! Thing!" And then with a flash from her horn she cleaned herself up, tidying up her mane and tail and cleaning all the dirt from her body, before she went on like nothing happened. "Now, where were we?"
"Drama queen much?" muttered Rainbow Dash, and Rarity smacked her over the head with a hairbrush. "Hey! Ow..."
Pinkie Pie gasped, looking around. "Oh my gosh, why are we in the Everfree Forest?" Fluttershy was cowering as she looked around, her eyes wide in terror at the total non-existence of any hostile creatures in the immediate vicinity. "Isn't it so scaaary, Fluttershy?" In the blink of an eye, she was in front of the mare in question, who eeped and tried to hide.
"Pinkie Pie!" exclaimed Twilight, condescendingly. "Don't scare Fluttershy like that."
"Tact, darling," added Rarity, frowning. "Poor Fluttershy is so very fragile, you know that."
"Can somepony please tell me what in Tartarus is going on here?" asked Rainbow Dash, and, just like that, the memories flooded back. "Oh, ponyfeathers."
"Rainbow Dash!" exclaimed Rarity. "The princesses are here! You'll be so kind as to mind your language!"
"Okay, for the record, that wasn't me scared, that was the knife making me scared." Her mind cleared, she could remember the influence of the knife, whilst she had before been unable to discern it, thanks to the spell.
"Sure, sugarcube," replied Applejack, smirking. "You jus' keep on believin' that." The others shared a laugh as Rainbow Dash fumed and Scootaloo looked on in horror. "Ah'm jus' kiddin' you."
Twilight, however, did not partake in the jest, being immersed in discerning what had happened. "I find it really hard to believe that I would do any of that!"
"Um... I don't..." whispered Fluttershy, almost inaudibly. Much to her dismay, Rainbow Dash heard.
"I'm with Fluttershy--" Fluttershy eeped again. "--You do overreact way too much to little things."
"I do not!" exclaimed Twilight, blushing, but before she could make any other arguments to the contrary, Discord finally showed up, clapping, with a baseball cap with Sweetie Belle and '#1' upon it.
"Fabulous job!" he exclaimed, finishing his clapping. "You put on a wonderful show. And what a twist! Sweetie Belle, you must be so proud of yourself, having-" Celestia shut his mouth with magic suddenly.
"Having what?" asked Sweetie Belle.
Discord snapped his fingers and his mouth broke free from Celestia's grip. "Oh, they haven't told you yet?" He knew that they hadn't, of course. "Are the Princesses, me not forbid, scared? This is it! The end of Equestria! Dearies, you are being far too overdramatic about all this. Really. You should know better."
"Overdramatic about what?!" asked Sweetie Belle, indignantly. She was fed up with not receiving any answers. "What was that about the singing? What were those swirls? Why does Discord say you're scared? Can I please get some answers here?"
"All in due time, my little pony," replied Celestia, clearly shaken. "Your questions will be answered when we return to Ponyville and the whole story has been told." Before anyone could say anything, she put a hoof to her mouth. "Later. Let us go." With that, they all disappeared.
"And that's how Equestria was made!" exclaimed Pinkie Pie, as the story was finished. They sat in the throne room, with extra, but also comfortable chairs for the Princesses, the Crusaders, and Discord.
"Pinkie, that's getting old now," Rainbow Dash droned.
"What is?" asked Pinkie, confused. "What did I say?" Rainbow groaned.
"Now that the story is finished, I know we all have the same question to ask," said Twilight.
"I am her sister," Rarity interjected. "I simply must ask. When did you develop such beautiful singing?" she asked, her eyes gleaming.
"I don't think that's the question we were supposed to ask..." whispered Fluttershy.
"Oh. Yes. I suppose I do have to ask what those swirls were. But that is hardly important!"
Twilight deadpanned, but before she could say anything, Sweetie Belle interrupted.
"Just, somepony tell me what's going on here! Why did you want me to sing? What were those swirls?" She stood up indignantly.
"Sit down, my little pony," said Celestia, sternly. "We have much to speak about." Sweetie Belle sighed and reluctantly sat down next to her friends. Celestia and Luna were hesitant, and worry was clearly etched upon Luna's face.
Discord sighed. "Oh, do get on with it," he said. "Don't tell me you aren't scared again. You can't get over bad memories unless you actually face them."
Luna sighed. "Thou art right, as much as we hate to admit. We will begin," Luna began, and everypony felt a strange sense of redundancy. "But this story starts many thousands of years ago. With our mother."
"You have a mother?" asked Scootaloo, very surprised.
"Scootaloo, everypony has a mother," Apple Bloom droned in reply.
"I've never seen yours," Scootaloo retorted.
"She's out n' about fer a while," Applejack said. "She's been sending us letters."
"Darn tootin' she has! She explores the world lookin' fer new kinds of apples!" Apple Bloom added.
"Well- Uh-" Scootaloo didn't know what to say. "Well, I'm an orphan! I don't have any mother!"[11]
[11]: Late this morning, Scootaloo yawned and rolled out of bed. "Oh, woe is me!" she exclaimed, mock-dramatically. "I have to sleep in a box in an alleyway! No house!" She sniffed the wonderful smell of potatoes coming from downstairs. "I have to scounge around for food!" She trotted down the stairs, as she cried, "No mother! No father! No anything! Oh, hi mom," she finished, as she sat down to eat.
"Scootaloo, you're not an orphan," Sweetie Belle said, exasperatedly. "I thought you were done with that."
"Done with what? I'm totally an orphan." The other Crusaders groaned.
Celestia wisely decided to continue before this became an argument. "Yes, Scootaloo, everypony does have a mother. Including us. Her name was Cor Cantae Amoris, Heart of Love's Song. Mi Amore Cadenza was named after her."
"She was the Queen of Song," continued Luna. " 'Tis not a useless position, however ye may think. Cor Cantae Amoris-"
"This is boring," said Discord.
"Um... It doesn't seem very boring to me..."
"Oh, but it will be! Luna is the worst storyteller. Her mother would go on and on about trying to persuade her daughter to learn from her, but no. To this day, she refuses to take tips." Luna snorted indignantly.
"We would like to see thee try," she said, with an air of arrogance around her.
"Why, is that a challenge? Well then, if I win, you have to try to learn." Luna harrumphed. Suddenly, they were all facing a large screen. Cliché Italian accordion music was playing in the background. The screen showed a felt set for puppets, with just Amoris in the centre. She was an alicorn, with fur that was mostly pink like that of Cadence, but it faded into white at her hooves and up her wings. She had a long, flowing mane and tail, with Luna's dark blue and Celestia's blues and greens.
"Cor Cantae Amoris was the Queen of Song," began Discord, dramatically. "She was an incredibly overdramatic pony, which was extremely annoying but endearing all the same. She was by far the best musician in all of the world!" The puppet grew until her face took up the entire screen. "So she decided to one up every single musician ever, and figured out that the Heart Song was the essence of all magic!" A puppet of Twilight Sparkle appeared, which was promptly crushed by a heart with poorly drawn music notes scattered around it.
"She revolutionised magic with this new-found discovery, and she found out that she, oh my, could use the Song itself!" The heart shrunk and floated into the mouth of Amoris. "But alas, only she could use this magic, and she despaired! But at the same time she was happy because she would forever be the greatest musician ever. Even counting future musicians, because she was extremely sure that nopony else would ever gain the ability. How sad. Even then, she taught her daughters how to use it, although they never could. And then she died. The end."
The music suddenly stopped in an extremely anti-climatic strain, and the screen rolled up, disappearing. The Crusaders and Rainbow Dash clapped wholeheartedly, but everypony else (excluding Fluttershy) was deadpan.
"That... Certainly explained what happened..." said Luna, uneasily.
"Very concise," added Celestia.
"That was great!" exclaimed Sweetie Belle, and then her demeanour dropped again. "But what does this have to do with me?"
Celestia was about to say something, but Discord stopped her. "Our dear princess here is just going to drag it out, so I'm going to cut to the chase for you. You can use the Heart Song! Congratulations, you just one-upped every musician ever!" The sound of cheering children filled the room.
"... Oh."
"That's boring," said Scootaloo. "The real question is, did we get our cutie marks?" At this, all three looked at their flanks, only just now remembering, and suddenly everyone felt a sense of eerie contrivance. There were two groans, and one gasp.
"Won'cha look at that!" exclaimed Apple Bloom, looking at Sweetie Belle's new cutie mark. It was a heart enveloped in Sweetie's magical aura, with notes rising up from it.
"Oh, it's positively gorgeous!" exclaimed Rarity, fainting onto a fainting couch that was conveniently there for the fainting.
"You have been blessed with great power, my little pony," said Celestia, comfortingly. "But with great power comes great responsibility, and you must learn how to use it, lest you lose control. You must come to Canterlot, so you may be trained."
Sweetie Belle thought on this for a few moments, but she quickly knew what was wrong. "I can't leave my friends!" she exclaimed. "We need to keep Crusading! I don't want to leave!"
"Yeah, please don't make her leave!" Scootaloo cried.
"We need 'er!" Apple Bloom added.
Celestia opened her mouth again, but Luna stopped her. "We shall stay in Ponyville to train the filly," she said to Celestia. "She with her friends will in turn teach us the ways of the ponies of now. Thou knowest well that we know more than thou dost on the subject."
"Celestia dissed studying when she was little," Discord stage-whispered, and the princess in question blushed.
"Well... I suppose," Celestia said, with a tone of finality, and the Crusaders cheered. "I do not wish to tear you and yours apart. Now, we cannot stay further. We have much to discuss. I will see you again very soon, my little ponies." Before anypony could say another word, Celestia and Luna disappeared. Most of the ponies shuffled out of the room one by one, until Applejack and the Crusaders were the only ones left.
"Ah wonder what happened ta that ol' blunt parin' knife," mused Applejack.
"Dunno, it's stuck in the Everfree somewhere. Who knows?" Scootaloo didn't care about it any more, it was done and over with.
"The spells are all gone, anyway," added Sweetie Belle. "It'll just sit there, doing nothing. Nothing to worry about." Satisfied, they all left the castle.
Somewhere in the Everfree Forest, a plain, blunt paring knife rattled.
Author's Note
And, that's it! That's my first (real) story on this site, and a one-shot, I suppose for all this about One-shotober. I've had this lurking in my mind for a while, and so I finally decided to put it on paper, or, more accurately, computer. My knowledge of Luna's dialect comes from a few studies on the matter, and also much reading of the Matthew Henry Commentary of the Bible and John Bunyan's Holy War. I also study Latin, which is where I pulled that name (Cor Cantae Amoris). It means, literally, Heart of the Song of Love, or if you like to use possessives instead of 'of's for translations, Love's Song's Heart, which is much less pretty.
I really don't know what else to put here, except for thanks for my editors, LegendBegins (with no account on this site) and Dusk Shimmer (no idea what his account is, I'm such a sad person). I once made the mistake of not getting an editor. Never again.
Commence awkward goodbye thing.
