Rainbow Dash Sells her Soul to Satan
Twilight groaned yet again. After an all night binge-reading session, it was too early for her to be walking through town with Rainbow Dash. The incessant twang of Rainbow's inexperienced hoof on her new guitar was not helping Twilight's headache at all. Twilight could see the castle in the distance, and let out a sigh of relief as she thought of going back to bed. The harsh strike of another failed attempt at the guitar filled her ears, making Twilight wince.
"Would you please give it a rest, Rainbow?" Twilight asked, as nicely as she could manage given her current state.
Rainbow Dash hovered in the air beside her, looking down at the acoustic guitar in her hooves, attempting to unravel the secret of not making it sound like she was pestering an angry cat. "I'm just trying to figure out how to play it, Twi. Geez, don't get so worked up," Rainbow said, not looking up from her new instrument.
"You just got it today. You need to practice before you can be good at it. That really is a unicorn's instrument anyway."
Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"
Twilight stopped and motioned a hoof towards the fret board. "Look at those tiny grooves. How are you supposed to play those with your hoof?"
Rainbow rolled her eyes and gave Twilight a nonchalant wave. "Oh please. When am I ever not good at something? I could be the best guitarist in the world in no time."
Twilight turned around and sighed again. The sooner she could get back to her castle and go back to bed, the better. "If you say so."
"Oh come on, Twilight, you know how good I am at like, everything," Rainbow said, trying to strum an epic chord on her instrument, only to have it turn out like somepony was taking a baseball bat to a trash can. Both of them cringed at the sound. Rainbow eased off of her cocky expression slightly. "Okay, I might need a little help. Do you have any books on guitar in your new library."
The thought of having Rainbow Dash raking on that thing in her library for a couple of hours made Twilight wince, but her desire to be a good friend won out... just barely. "I don't know, Rainbow. There might be one or two books in there. I did just have it set up last week, remember?"
Rainbow's ears perked up and a smile crossed her face. "Good enough for me!" she said. Rainbow sped off into a multi-colored blur towards the castle, too impatient to stay with Twilight. "Meet you there!" Twilight heard off in the distance.
Twilight sighed. She sped up towards the castle at a slow trot. As appealing as the thought of her bed was to her tired mind, last time Rainbow Dash was alone in the library, she had to reshelve for a week.
Rainbow had long since left Twilight in the dust, and was now speeding through the castle, looking for her new library. After checking every other room, she finally opened a door into Twilight's massive library. Her eyes went wide as she looked at the massive rows of books on two different levels. "Woah..." she said, "How am I supposed to find anything in here?"
Determined to get on her epic guitar journey as fast as possible, she took a book out of each section and scanned it over quickly. When she found one with a title that didn't have the word "guitar" in it, she just tossed it on the floor. Twilight would clean it up later.
She'd gone through half the library before a book caught her eye. A quick scan over the title made Rainbow's eyebrows raise. "The Lusty Pegasus Maid, huh?" Rainbow read aloud with a sultry smile. She forgot about the guitar hanging around her shoulders and moved a hoof to open the book, but the book case in front of her let out a groan.
Rainbow looked up curiously at it, then the entire case swung around, catching her in the air and throwing her into a dark room before slamming back into place with a loud bang. Rainbow flew through the air, not of her own accord and hit the ground hard. She slid to a stop finally, the smut book sliding in beside her.
Rainbow groaned and rose to her hooves. She rubbed the back of her head where the case had hit her, and tried to focus in her vision. Her guitar seemed to have fallen off during the furniture's assault, but she had bigger things to focus on.
Like the room full of lit candles and a giant red pentagram. A black book sat on a pedastool in the middle of the marking. A red glow emanated from the pentagram etched into its cover.
"Oh, neat," Rainbow said, enticed by the shiny object.
As soon as she lifted her hoof to touch it, the book flew open and flames erupted from its pages, filling the room with a molten heat that Rainbow couldn't get away from. She was blinded for a moment by the brightness and let out another yelp as the flames overtook her body. She could feel herself being burned alive and reformed all at the same time.
In an instant, the explosion was over, and Rainbow opened her eyes to see the dark overlord himself, but as a pony, she had no idea what she was looking at.
The beast in front of her gave an evil roar as it formed from the flames. Pitch-black eyes and horns formed onto a blood-red face that connected to a wicked torso protruding from the lava around it. On each of its hands were sets of claws that looked like they could rip through rock.
Rainbow gulped as he finally stopped thrashing around in the lava and turned to face her. She had no means of escape; the small island she was standing on was barely big enough to take a step in any direction, and her wings were pinned to her sides out of fear. She didn't want to think of what might happen if she tried to fly away from this monster.
"What brings you to my plane of torment, mortal!" he snarled. The power of his voice resounded through Rainbow's bones.
"I-I uhh... got lost looking for a book?" she said with a shaky voice and a sheepish smile, hoping he might be understanding.
Satan gave her a scrutinizing look and leaned over the island, towering over Rainbow. She gulped as he came closer. "You stumbled into hell looking for a book?"
Rainbow looked around. The cries of the damned? Eternal hellfire burning in every direction? The prince of darkness about to devour her soul? Yeah, this was hell alright. "S-Something like that." Rainbow gave a nervous laugh and tried to back up, but only slipped off the edge slightly and had to reposition herself. "So, if you could just send me back, that'd be awesome. It was nice to visit and all, but I better get going, you know?" Rainbow gave him a fake smile, but he didn't seem to buy it.
Satan grabbed her by the midsection and hoisted her into the air, bringing her close to his face to look her over. Rainbow yelped at being lifted, then winced as she saw his face coming closer to her. To her surprised, he didn't bite her head off or anything.
His studying look turned into an evil grin as a plan formed in his head. "What is it you desire, mortal?"
Rainbow brightened at the question. Maybe some good would come of this after all. "Oh! I want to get good at guitar."
With his other hand, Satan summoned a ball of fire that flashed away into a contract. "Then it shall be yours. Just sign your eternal soul away to me and I will grant you the skill of the greatest guitarist in the world."
Rainbow's pupils grew wide and her face lit up with wonder at the prospect. The greatest in the world? And at the cost of just her soul? Sounded fair. "Awesome! Where do I sign?"
A dark smile grew on Satan's face. "Right here, minion," he said as he pointed to the bottom of the contract where an x was, followed by a line. A quill appeared out of a ball of fire in front of her, and Rainbow took it in her mouth and signed her name without a second thought.
"Now when do I get to--" Rainbow started, but was cut off by Satan as he threw his head back and let out an evil laugh that shook even the lava around him. He threw Rainbow Dash back down to the tiny island, and with a mighty breath, he bathed her in hellfire.
Rainbow winced once the flame hit her, but opened her eyes again when she realized it didn't hurt, even though it was quickly melting her skin and bones away.
"Now go my minion, bring my evil power to your land," Satan said, his demonic teeth in plain view through his evil grin. Before Rainbow could say anything, she completely incinerated into the fire.
Rainbow rematerialized back in the secret room in the library with a fiery pop, sending her across the room and into the wall. She groaned and rubbed her head. Being incinerated usually leaves one sore for a few days. Rainbow struggled to her hooves, slowly regaining her strength after being hurled back from the depths of hell.
"Rainbow? Where are you?" she could hear Twilight call out with an angry tone. Rainbow went stiff at her voice. She was going to be pissed for messing with her dark magic or whatever the giant pentagram room was supposed to be.
"Rainbow! What have I told you about throwing books down!?" Rainbow Dash looked around for a way out in the dark room, but the only exit seemed to be the bookcase that threw her in here. She waited silently, hoping Twilight would just forget about her or something. Hoofbeats came closer and closer to the outside of the room, until Rainbow couldn't hear them anymore.
"Oh, you better not--" The bookcase whirled around again, slinging Twilight in this time. She didn't land any more gracefully than Rainbow did, sliding face first into the room with her hind legs in the air. She skidded to a stop in front of Rainbow Dash, a mouthful of floor and an expression of extreme agitation. Rainbow couldn't help laugh at her, even if she just got busted hardcore.
"Nice landing," Rainbow said with a snicker.
Twilight groaned and teleported herself up with a flash of her horn. She brushed herself off with a hoof, then glared daggers over at Rainbow. "What are you even doing in here?"
"I was looking for books and your bookshelf just kinda ate me I guess," Rainbow said with a shrug, looking back at the offending bookshelf.
Twilight looked around, then quickly realized what room she was in. Twilight gasped. "Rainbow, you didn't..." Twilight frantically searched for anything that might be out of place. Rainbow rolled her eyes, preparing for one of her usual lectures.
Twilight's eyes fell onto the glowing red markings around the pedastool. In one place the red line had a smudge on one edge, causing Twilight to almost blow a blood vessel right there. "Rainbow Dash! Look what you've done!" Twilight said, exasperated, "You've destroyed the summoning circle! How am I supposed to have my demon gangba--er... practice my dark magic now!"
Rainbow's face went from uncaring to shocked. "Demon gangbangs?" she mouthed under her breath questioningly.
"Ah! Getoutgetoutgetoutgetoutgetout!" Twilight yelled in frustration. She grabbed Rainbow with her magic and threw her right back into the bookcase, making it spin around and make her faceplant into the carpet of the library outside.
Seeing stars, Rainbow let out another groan and slowly got to her shaky hooves. "What is her problem?" Rainbow asked, rubbing the bruise growing on her head with a hoof.
Rainbow turned to walk down the walkway out of the library, completely forgetting about the events of the past ten minutes, until the sight of her guitar caught her eye. Her eyes lit up brightly at the sight. "Greatest guitarist in the world..." She said with wonder. Rainbow knelt down to her guitar and took it into her hooves.
The old, beat-up acoustic hand-me-down guitar instantly went up in bright red flames, incinerating the deteriorated wood and out-of-tune strings, replacing them with a wicked concoction of metal spikes and the finest ebony wood. From the depths of hell shot out a set of light top/heavy bottom strings for that extra crunch. Dripping with blood, lightly emanating the screams of the damned, and set on fire in a couple of places, the guitar formed in Rainbow's hooves.
With slightly singed hair, Rainbow looked over the guitar with wide, amazed eyes. Rainbow looped the writhing snakes it had for a strap over her shoulder and went to play it. As if a natural instinct, her wingtips wrapped around her to touch the frets. "Huh, why didn't I think of that?"
Passing on the thought, Rainbow began to play. Fire erupted from her wingtips and hooves as they cascaded down the fret board and picked the strings at lightning speed. The wicked licks and the staggering speed at which the scales were played were sure to melt the face off of anyone in earshot. The walls of the library bent to her will as the power of billions of lost souls blasted through her ravenous riffs.
"That. Was. Awesome!" Rainbow yelled, throwing a hoof in the air as she completed her last note. In the same explosion of red fire, a leather jacket appeared around her torso, complete with studs and a glowing pentagram on the back.
With a devious smile on her face, Rainbow flew out of the library to put her new-found talents to good use.
______________________________________________________________________
At least half of Ponyville was in attendance that day in town square. The clouds above circled ominously over the the impromptu stage, blood red lightning striking out over the buildings around the area. Despite the hellish sight, the citizens couldn't take their eyes off of the stage.
With one last demonic chord, Rainbow Dash sent her latest victim flying off the stage in a smoking husk, sending the poor guitarist through three brick walls and a fruit stand.
"Who else wants some?!" Rainbow yelled, a deeper undertone ringing out with her voice, "Any guitarist in all of Ponyville, no, all of Equestria! No one has a chance! Just come and try, mortals!" Rainbow ended with a hellish laugh.
All of the ponies in the crowd looked amongst each other nervously, then began to slowly back away from the pitch black, spiky stage. They all knew that even the most talented among them had no chance.
"Really? None of you have the guts to face off against the master?" Rainbow said, eyeing each member of the crowd. In her intense gaze, her pupils transformed into snake-like slits and her sclera faded to pitch black.
"Fine, I have a solo for you cowards!" Rainbow whipped her feathers around the frets, making a snarling song that summoned red, ferocious demons out of flaming cracks in the ground around the stage. As the denizens tried to run, the ground cracked underneath them and the claws of hell wrapped around them.
Rarity, out for her daily errands, stopped as she headed into town square and noticed the weather. Rarity gasped. "What is the meaning of this? We aren't due for rain for another week."
Rarity turned her eyes back down to the chaos of town square. She raised an eyebrow and looked on in confusion until she spotted Rainbow Dash at the epicenter of the chaos. Rarity rolled her eyes and trotted towards the stage, mumbling about Rainbow's shenanigans and how this was the third time this week.
After pushing a few demons out of her way with magic, Rarity made her way onto the stage. Rainbow Dash was still playing as hard as her wings could go, releasing the very depths of hell around her.
"Rainbow Dash!" Rarity said in a stern tone, "Just what do you think you're doing?"
Rarity's voice snapped Rainbow Dash out of her mid-metal reverie. She stopped playing and looked over at her friend, a proud smile crossing her face.
"Hey, Rarity! Check it out; I've got some rad guitar skills now," Rainbow said, putting her wing back to the guitar and preparing to play again. Rarity put a hoof out to the guitar to stop her.
"Yes, Darling. I've been 'checking it out' all the way up here. You didn't happen to get that skill from some sort of dark magic, did you?"
Rainbow stepped back from Rarity, looking away from her with a sheepish smile on her face. "Haha, what makes you say that?"
"Your coat is stained with blood, a large portion of your guitar is on fire, you have live snakes crawling around you body, and your wings just turned into leather abominations," Rarity said with a flat expression.
Rainbow looked back at her wings, stretching out the new dark red skin with claws tipping the end where her old primary feathers were.
"Woah..." she said under her breath. She quickly shook out of her amazement and put on an innocent face for Rarity. "Come on, Rares. Twilight was just... practicing some new spell! Yeah, that was it. She was practicing a spell and decided to try it out on me!" Rainbow said, proud of her own lie.
"Rainbow, dear, I sincerely doubt our Twilight would be using magic that would cause such destruction." Rarity motioned out to the massacre that was happening in the crowd.
"What? They'll be fine," Rainbow said with a nonchalant wave.
"Daisy is being eaten by demons and I can count at least three ponies that are running around on fire," Rarity said with an unamused expression. She knew exactly whose fault this was, and Rainbow's lies were wearing on her patience.
"She's, uhh..." Rainbow Dash looked out into the crowd to see two demons take large bites out of the screaming pony in question. "Oh it's just a scratch."
Rarity rolled her eyes and took hold of Rainbow's ear with her magic, dragging her with her off of the stage and towards the castle. "Come, Darling. Let's get you to Twilight. You are causing havoc for this town and that shade of red doesn't go with your coat at all."
Rainbow sighed and let herself be dragged. Hell hath no fury like a fashionista trying to fix tacky.
_____________________________________________________________________
"...and so I pulled her over here so you might put a stop to this, Twilight," Rarity said, shooting a stern look over to Rainbow Dash. Rainbow tapped her hoof against the castle floor, looking off in another direction with an annoyed expression.
"Why didn't you tell me you used the book, Rainbow!?" Twilight asked, "Look at you! You're covered in blood and becoming more of a demon by the second!" Twilight motioned towards the horn that just popped out of one side of Rainbow's head.
Rainbow shrugged. "It's not my fault you let anyone into your secret gangbang room," Rainbow said, the demonic undertone of her voice growing louder with each word.
Twilight opened her mouth, but froze in shock when she realized what Rainbow had said. A dark blush crossed her face and she looked away from her two friends. She coughed into her hoof, and Rarity looked between the two in confusion.
Twilight cleared her throat and stood tall, choosing to ignore Rainbow's comment. "At any rate, I've already sent for the other girls. We'll have this fixed in no time."
Rainbow's eyes shot open in shock. She looked between Twilight and Rarity, confused and bordering on angry. "What? What do you mean 'fix this'? This is the most awesome thing ever! There's nothing to fix!"
"You're crying blood and half of your body is on fire!" Twilight yelled, ready for an argument. Rarity stepped between them and put a hoof in front of Twilight.
"Rainbow, dear, this look is simply garish. And do you really want to be known as the mare who cheated her way to be the best guitarist in the world? I think both of us agree you would be much better off."
Rarity turned her nose up, not willing to compromise. Rarity felt Twilight leave the end of her hoof, and she looked over her. "Twilight, whatever is the--"
The look of terror on Twilight's face made Rarity swing her head back towards Rainbow Dash. The demon before them bore almost no resemblance to their old friend. On four sharp, crab-like legs that protruded out of her back, Rainbow rose above them with a look of infinite rage on her face. Her eyes burned with a bright red fire and her guitar snapped into position, ready to be played.
The door to the library shot open, and the rest of the girls poured in, only to see the horror that was now their old, flying friend.
"What in tarnation!?"
"Oh my!" Fluttershy said, cowering behind Applejack.
"Ooooh, what's going on with Rainbow? Did she get a new Nightmare Night costume? Oh! Is this a costume party ? Why didn'--"
Twilight turned tail and ran, with Rarity close behind. "It isn't a party, Pinkie. Run!"
All of the girls except Pinkie turned to run towards the exit, only to hit the metal door face first as a strange flame welded the opening shut. The girls landed in a heap in front of the door, with Rainbow quickly climbing on her new limbs towards them.
Pinkie cocked her head and studied Rainbow's new form. "Then what is it? Nightmare Night isn't for another three months."
Twilight turned on her back and looked up to Rainbow in horror. "She's a... a..."
"Did you really think you could coax my new minion out of her eternal contract with a few words?!" A demonic voice that was no longer Rainbow Dash's growled. With an intense glare, she looked over the quivering ponies, then laughed loud enough to make thier ears ring. "Pathetic. You will all burn for an eternity as my personal slaves. Be devoured!"
The same claws that Rarity had seen in town earlier cracked the floor of the library and grabbed each pony by their midsection, dragging them down into a pit of eternal hellfire. They all screamed at the top of their lungs with fright, except for Pinkie Pie, who was still rubbing her chin in contemplation.
At the end of their fall, the girls landed in a dark cavern, each of the scattered across the hot stone floor. Their groans echoed around the cave as they all tried to shake the immense fall off.
"Uggghhh," Twilight moaned, rubbing her head. "Is everypony alright?"
Before anyone could answer, the room lit up with the brightest fire any of them had ever seen. The massive upper body of the dark lord himself protruded into the cavern at the end of the room, Rainbow Dash hovering on her bat wings at his side. The girls all shot to the center of the room as flames licked the walls. They huddled together, quivering and passing terrified glances between Satan himself, and their controlled friend. Except for Pinkie Pie, whose face lit up brightly with sudden realization.
"Ooooh, she sold her soul to Satan! It makes sense now!"
"Pinkie!" Twilight yelled over in frustration.
"Silence slaves!" Satan commanded. The volume and depth of his voice made all the girls freeze in fear. "Enjoy your last moments without pain, for the rest of eternity will be filled with agonizing torment overseen personally by--"
"He's not quite as terrifying as I'd imagined. I thought he'd be taller too," Pinkie said, looking over evil incarnate with a scrutinous eye.
Satan was taken aback by the interruption. He raised an eyebrow at the tiny pink mare, confused as to why any mortal would dare interrupt him.
"There has to be some other way," Twilight said, stepping out of the group, "We just want our friend back. Can't we work something out?"
The flames around the room exploded with heat as Satan's face lit up with rage. "There is NO escape from my eternal--"
"Oh, you just have to beat him in a musical duel. Then any contract in question with him becomes instantly void," Pinkie said with a smile. All the girls looked over at her in utter confusion.
"Damn you, mortal!" Satan shouted.
Pinkie Pie snickered. "You already did that, silly."
Satan's eye twitched with fury at Pinkie. With his one weakness revealed, he turned to the rest of the girls with an expression of contempt. "Choose your instruments. I'll make this useless competition quick."
Twilight's face lit up with hope. She turned around to face her friends, new-found determination on her face. "We can do this girls." Twilight gave them a curt nod, and they all stepped up to their hooves and returned it, determination coming to their faces as well... except for Pinkie Pie, who kept her same playful smile.
"The oboe!" Twilight proclaimed proudly.
"The banjo!" Applejack said, stepping forward.
"The harp," Rarity said, giving her mane a proud toss across her shoulders.
"Um... the guitar," Fluttershy mumbled quiet enough to where no one except Satan understood her.
"Oh you know me, Satan. The usual," Pinkie Pie said finally.
Satan rolled his eyes and snapped his fingers.
In the hooves of each mare appeared their instrument of choice in a plume of fire. Around Pinkie Pie appeared her usual ten instruments of choice.
With the boring formalities out of the way, Satan leaned forward, a sickening smile crossing his face. "Now go forth my minion, show these mortals what true power looks like."
Rainbow Dash curled her lips up, revealing her sharpened teeth into a devilish grin. Her guitar burned to life and dripped with the essence of the damned. Her clawed wings wrapped around the fret board, ready to release all manner of hellish sounds.
"This is it girls, give it your all!" Twilight said, putting the reed of her oboe to her mouth.
Satan summoned a set of spiky, massive drums in front of him, ready to release the bombastic beats to the battle for their souls.
The snare started and the bass boomed as Rainbow began her first lick. Twilight was the first to try her luck. She blew into the oboe, her hooves dancing around the keys, creating a wonderful melody. Twilight's well-practiced hooves channeled every night of playing after her homework, making music that was technically magnificent, but not powerful enough to trade blows with Rainbow's wicked solos.
With a blast of red lightning out of Rainbow's guitar, Twilight was thrown back into the cave wall, her instrument exploding out of her hooves.
The girls looked back at their injured friend with concern, only to look back at Rainbow with even greater determination. Applejack stood up to the plate next, closing her eyes and letting the country tunes of ten generations flow through her hooves. The southern twang had immense energy, but Rainbow's fast-crawling chords tore Applejack right off her hooves, destroying her instrument and sending her back as well.
Rarity was next, delicately brushing her hooves across the harp to create a heavenly sound that let a gentle rhythm flow through the cavern. Rainbow cared not for the soft melody, and let out a sickening slide up the fret board with a combination of her hooves and wings that demolished any chance she had at victory as she was slung across the cave as well.
And then there was one--and Pinkie Pie--left. Fluttershy cowered at the sight ahead of her. Intense flames made her knees shake, and sweat ran down her face as Satan's beat assaulted her and Rainbow waited for her to start with that demonic smile.
"Y-You can do it, Fluttershy! You have to!" Twilight yelled with a shaky voice. The rest of the girls looked towards Fluttershy, apprehension in their eyes.
Fluttershy gulped and looked back at her opposition. The fear in her heart began to grip at her, threatening to turn into panic. She took a deep breath, and put her wingtips to the fret, trying to expel her stage fright.
With a frightened wince, Fluttershy started playing. Her wingtips shredded through the frets and picked faster than anything even Satan had seen. Pinkie Pie took this as a cue to start her own playing, keeping a wacky beat for Fluttershy and acting as an entire band behind her. The beat faltered as both him and Rainbow stopped to stare for a moment. A light broke through the ceiling, enveloping Fluttershy in a heavenly glow, lifting her off her hooves as the scales poured out of her guitar at amazing speeds, yet still sounded as smooth as silk. Rainbow knew she was falling behind, so with an intense scowl, she began to battle back, trading riffs with Fluttershy as the heavenly light grew greater around the cave.
Fear crossed Satan's face as the light began to beat back Rainbow. Her intense, hectic style of playing couldn't keep up with Fluttershy's majesty. Every lick she attempted was beaten down and out-shined by Fluttershy's technical prowess. Fluttershy's majestic speed metal blew every mind in the cave, and burned every part of demonic power out of Rainbow Dash.
Satan dropped his drumsticks and put his hands out in front of him to block the light. He screamed and began to melt into the light. With a final power-chord, Fluttershy vanquished the evil around her and enveloped the once-hellish cave in a flash of heavenly light.
In an instant, they were back in the library with Fluttershy floating back down to her hooves. All the girls looked with wide eyes at their meek friend, astounded such power could erupt from such a shy pony.
"F-Fluttershy... how did you...?" Twilight asked, being the first to pick her jaw up off the floor.
Fluttershy touched down gracefully, letting her white explorer guitar set down at her hooves. Her eyes opened and she looked around. "Did I win?"
"Did you?" Applejack said, putting an arm around Fluttershy, "Why, you kicked that thing back to the ninth plane of torment. That was amazing, Sugarcube!"
Rarity stepped forward, looking Fluttershy over to make sure she was the same friend she'd went down there with. "Fluttershy, however did you acquire such a talent?"
"What did you think I did when I wasn't looking after animals?"
The girls all shared a laugh and had a group hug with their savior. All except Rainbow, who sat in front of her beat up old acoustic with a pout on her face. After their hug was done, Twilight went over to Rainbow and put a reassuring hoof on her shoulder.
"You know, if you want to get better, I think I know someone who can teach you," Twilight said in a soft tone.
Rainbow turned around, her guitar all but forgotten about. "Nah, guitar isn't really my thing. I'll just go back to being the fastest flier in all of Equestria," Rainbow said, flying out of the library door as if nothing happened.
Everypony in a twenty mile radius collectively face-hoofed.
