Mirror Finale

The sun was setting as we approached the Portal.

I had to capitalize it. Shimmer's creation was more than just the sum of its parts; the twisted, black-spined frame seemed to have grown of its own accord while no one was watching, and I couldn't escape the feeling that when I watched it, some part of it was leering back. There was an electric hum in the air, and a nauseating scent of oil and toxic metal, made more evident by the circle of dying grass that was rapidly spreading around it. Even the air itself seemed to darken as our small group approached it. Despite an unnatural heat, I shivered. If there was ever anything I'd encountered that felt like it could tear a hole in the fabric of time and space, it was this.

Princess led the way, tightly holding a large travel bag and Flash's hand. A small, purple dog stuck close by her heels. Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy followed close behind, with Rarity a few steps back, Coco clinging to her arm nervously. With everyone else having been sent away, I wondered if the girl didn't have anywhere else go to. Applejack and I brought up the rear, with her arm still locked around mine. I couldn't tell if it was meant to be comforting or restraining.

Shimmer was already waiting. She was leaning against a table she'd set up nearby, idly flicking through her phone, which she pocketed as we drew near. I thought I recognized some of the tools and sensors behind her, but they'd been so mangled by whatever she'd done to them that I couldn't guess at their purposes now. Sunset sat glumly against the table's leg, and Shining Armour stood behind it. I noted, with a cold flash of disgust, that since he'd left the party his shirt had somehow come untucked. "Oh good, you found her," Shimmer said loudly, smirking in my direction. "We were starting to think she'd chickened out. Another few minutes and we were gonna phone her mommy."

I put up a weak glare. We spread out along the edge of the circle of dead grass, with Coco and I, the outsiders, a step back. Princess walked forward and put her bag down in front, taking a deep breath. "Is everything ready?" she asked.

"Just about." Suddenly Shimmer darted forward, and the next thing I knew she was shoving a tissue in my face. "Spit in this," she instructed.

In a panic, I tried to squirm back. "What?" I gasped.

"Spit. We need some fluid from you, and if you won't spit then blood's the next easiest." She let go of me, and as if by magic she was suddenly twirling her knife, dangerously close to my arm. "Your choice."

I gulped. With everyone watching I tried to call some moisture into my dry mouth, and after a humiliating thirty seconds managed a pathetic dribble into the sheet. Shimmer soaked this up then whipped back over to Princess, who spat in the tissue as well, then took it and smacked it against the Portal's stone surface. It immediately started to blacken. "That should do it," she muttered, chewing thoughtfully on a finger. "How's everything else?"

Shimmer's phone came out again. She held it up, displaying lines of flashing, scrolling numbers. "Atmosphere's at 90%. The crystals are marinaded, the oil's prepped, and I've thrown out all the breached batteries. It's as good as it's ever going to get."

"Okay." She took another deep breath, slightly ragged. It didn't escape any of us that she was trembling. "How... how long do we have?"

"The minor conditions will start to deteriorate in about forty minutes. We can repair those if we have to, but the longer we wait, the harder this is going to get. Also, just saying, it would be a real bitch to have to set all this up again."

Pinkie Pie gasped. "Ooh! Swear jar! Swear jar!"

"Just put it on my tab," Shimmer snapped at her.

"What conditions?" Rainbow Dash asked Princess. "What's she talking about?"

"It's over your pretty little head," Shimmer sneered in her direction instantly.

"Enough of that," Applejack barked. She took half a step forward, her fists clenched. "We've waited long enough. I'd say you owe us some gosh-darn answers."

"Everyone, please!" Princess held up her hands. "I promise, Shimmer and I will explain everything in a few minutes. This is just the technical stuff. For now, please, we need to focus."

The two of them spent the next several minutes hunched over Shimmer's phone, poking the screen and whispering back and forth. Flash looked over their shoulders and tried to follow, while Shining Armour helped, making adjustments to the devices nearby as they directed him. The rest of us drifted a short distance away, watching tensely. "Alright, this is our last chance to talk this over," Applejack hissed. "Do we really trust Shimmer?"

There was an uneasy silence. "We should at least listen to what she has to say," Fluttershy offered up, but even she didn't sound certain.

"We shouldn't trust her," Sunset sighed. We all looked at her. She'd approached us slowly and was standing a few steps away, her head down in a posture uncomfortably similar to mine. "We should never have trusted her," she continued, keeping her voice low. "We shouldn't have let her into our lives. But it's too late now. She's got us by the throat, and we have to trust her. And all we can do is pray as hard as we can that she's right."

The hush fell again, until a small, nasal voice spoke up in our midst. "Well, my vote is that we get this over with as quickly as possible," Spike said, with two paws clamped over his snout. This got a small chuckle from the group and a sad smile from me. I was glad I hadn't brought my Spike; I pitied his poor canine nose.

I stared at the ground for another minute, tuning out of the world around me, until I felt the mass of Shining Armour move up beside me. "Hey Twiley," he said.

"Hi." I didn't look at him.

"Sorry I had to bail on you at the party. Something came up with Shimmer, and, well..."

"Yeah," I snapped. "I think I know exactly what 'came up' with Shimmer."

"Twiley, it wasn't like that." He reached out to me. "She needed m-"

"Save it." I swatted his hand away, grunting acidly at him. "It's fine. Okay? Fine. Tonight's about her. Not about me. I don't even care."

I showed no outward signs of it, but inwardly smirked as Shining looked around, no doubt receiving glares. "Hey," he said, trying to save face. "Tomorrow, we can..."

He paused. I waited tensely for several seconds before I heard what he heard: the sound of engines, getting closer. "Are we... expecting someone?" Spike asked.

Shimmer looked up distractedly and tossed her phone to Princess. "Nope," she answered. She leaped onto the table and squinted around the statue, frowning. "The fuck...?"

The rest of us leaned around the Portal, staring. I paled. A van hurtled by into the school parking lot, only to be overtaken by a bright pink motorcycle, which jumped the curb and came tearing across the grass toward us. The rider flipped up her visor and yelled over the sound of her motor. "Twiliiiiiiiight!"

At almost the last second, she turned sharply and skidded to a halt, throwing up a rain of dirt that scattered over us. I threw up my arms to shield myself, keeping them raised as the dust settled. Oh, McCarthy, I swore internally, frantically scanning for somewhere to hide. Twinkleshine... why now?

Princess cautiously approached as she dismounted, stretching out her hand. "Um, hello...?"

Twinkleshine just brushed past her and made a beeline through the middle of the group, straight to me. I caught a smile behind her helmet and suddenly she'd wrapped me up in a big bear hug, lifting me off the ground. "My bones were getting so twitchy for you," she whispered to me in a relieved voice. Then she turned around and started carrying me back the way she'd come, calling out in her usual chipper tone. "I found her!"

I looked over my shoulder, struggling to breathe in her grip. Colgate, Lyra and Bon Bon had piled out of the van and were sprinting toward us, all calling my name. Behind them, Lemon Hearts had tripped over her heels and sprawled on her face. "Twilight?" Applejack said, raising an eyebrow at me as I was carried past.

I squirmed. "Um..."

Colgate reached us first, barely winded. "Twilight..." She yanked me out of Twinkleshine's grip and made me face her, holding my shoulders as if she wanted to strangle me. "What the heck, Twilight?"

I turned bright red. Everyone was staring at me. "C-Colagate?" I stammered. "What are you guys doing here?"

"What are we-" She clenched her teeth as the others caught up. "Do you have any idea how worried we've been? You just ran out yesterday, no explanation, no crest, still high off that muffin for all we knew, along with some, some clone who popped up out of nowhere, and you didn't think we'd have any questions?"

"We were going to ask you about it today," Bon Bon added between gasps for breath. Behind her, Lyra was almost bent double, hands on her knees. "But then you didn't come to class today. And at lunch, 'Shine started aching so badly she almost cried."

"It's true. I cried," Twinkleshine said proudly.

Colgate counted on her fingers. "We called your phone. Duh, you left it in my room. We called your house. You weren't there. We searched all our houses. You weren't there. We drove all the way to the hospital... do you know how scared we were?" Tears of rage glittered in her eyes, stabbing through me. "We spent all day crawling around town looking for any sign of you. And then just by luck, Lyra found a group of girls coming home from a party, and they told us you were planning on leaving to another dimension! Forever!"

"I told ya they meant it literally," Lyra choked out with a grin.

"And you weren't even planning on saying goodbye?" Lemon Hearts asked.

The dead weight that had been sinking in my stomach with every word came to a surprised halt. "Girls, wait," I said.

"Do we not matter to you?" Colgate continued, striking another internal blow. "Were you just going to leave us wondering forever what happened to you? What pushed you to this?"

"I-"

"We've always been here for you, Twilight," Bon Bon added, the hurt in her voice twisting my insides even more. "After everything you've done for us, we would always have been willing to listen. Why couldn't you just talk to us?"

"But-"

Lyra sprang up. "You knew something as cool as interdimensional portals existed and you didn't tell me?" she said. "Is there a dimension where my fanfics are canon!?"

Desperately, I pointed with both hands at Princess. She waved awkwardly. "Her!" I gasped out quickly. "She's leaving through the portal. Not me. Her."

There was a moment of collective wheel-spinning as the group took this in. Then Colgate stepped back and put a hand on her forehead. "Ohhhhh. Okay. That makes a lot more sense."

"This makes sense?" Lemon Hearts whispered to her.

"No, but maybe if I keep saying that it'll stop me from flipping out."

"Ahem." I looked up at Shimmer, who was glaring down at us with a look of profound irritation. "Care to explain, Twilight?" she snapped.

I took a careful position between the two sides and gestured back at my study group. "Um. Everyone? This is my..." I took a breath and tried again. "These are my friends."

"This Twilight has friends?" Rainbow Dash blurted. Fluttershy punched her, but did it so lightly that she didn't notice.

"Hey, watch your mouth!" Twinkleshine pulled off her helmet and threw an arm around me, rubbing me with her cheek. "Twilight's the best study buddy a birdbrain like me could ask for!"

Pinkie Pie gasped. "Ohmygosh. Twinkle?"

Twinkleshine looked at her and straightened up so quickly she nearly knocked me over. "Ohmygosh. Pinkie!"

The two of them bounded towards each other and clasped hands, then started chattering to each other at a rapid-fire pace. "You two... know each other?" Princess asked over the unintelligible excitement.

"Pinkie was my first ever party planner!" Twinkleshine squawked giddily.

"And Twinkle was my first ever party supplier!" Pinkie Pie yelled in kind.

"And she taught me everything I know!" they said together.

The rest of the group stepped forward. Colgate and Applejack shook hands. Lyra and Rainbow Dash nodded sharply, checking each other out. Lemon Hearts and Rarity waved cheerily to each other; Bon Bon and Fluttershy, shyly. Princess and I stood off to the side, letting it happen. Flash and Shining joined us. "I... guess I misjudged you," Flash admitted.

"Still think you didn't follow your destiny?" Princess teased, nudging me.

"My little sis," Shining added, ruffling my hair.

I looked down. "They were right," I muttered.

"About what?" Princess asked.

"I don't deserve them. I've been a bad friend."

"Hey, don't say that." She put her arm around mine. "They chased you all the way to a hole in the universe. They wouldn't have done that for someone they thought was a bad friend."

"But I didn't even tell them... anything."

Princess shrugged. "Sometimes friends keep secrets. Sometimes friends make mistakes. But then we talk about it, and we understand. They'll understand. They obviously care about you a lot. Whatever you've done to earn their friendship, it always matters more than the things you haven't done."

...What I've done?

All I'd done was help them study. Nothing special. Just that. I hadn't even been doing it for them; studying in a group was known to help with comprehension and performance across the board. My motivations for hanging out with them had been entirely selfish. Sure, I'd helped them with their work when they needed it, but it wasn't like that was personal. I hadn't been trying to win their favour or anything. I was just trying to improve the cohesiveness of the group. That was the point of studying together.

What else? I'd sat passively and listened to them talk. I'd attended birthday parties, when I couldn't reasonably say no. I'd defended Lyra during the Vinegar Incident. Simple, idle, meaningless things, things anyone would have done if they'd been in my shoes. But just by doing what was expected of me, I'd tricked these girls into thinking that I was their friend. And now, because I was too stupid to see what I'd done, I'd hurt them. I'd hurt all of them.

Stupid.

"Are you okay?" Princess whispered to me.

I faked a smile. "I'm okay."

"Yeah, that's great," Shimmer said loudly, suddenly looming over us. "Now how about you pull yourself together and get these assholes out of here?"

All mirth stopped. "What?" Colgate asked, turning.

"You heard me." Shimmer addressed them all. "This thing is dangerous. As in 'real possibility that it could explode' dangerous. There's a reason we sent almost everyone else away. Obviously these dumbasses wouldn't leave their leader's side if you paid them, but what's going on tonight has nothing to do with any of you."

Colgate snorted. "You clearly don't understand what being friends is if you think that's true," she said.

"If this matters to Twilight, then it matters to us!" Twinkleshine said. She folded her arms, and Pinkie Pie followed suit.

"No... girls, no." I stepped forward. "She's right. This doesn't have anything to do with you. Please, please don't put yourselves in danger because of me."

"And miss seeing what that thing looks like when it's turned on?" Lyra shook her head wildly. "Heck no!"

"Whatever this is, it's obviously important to you," Bon Bon said. "And even if we can't help, we want to be with you while you see it through."

There was a pause. Colgate nudged Lemon Hearts, who was busy gaping at Flash. She jolted, startled. "Huh? Oh, right, friends, staying, Colgate pinch me he's so HOT."

I opened my mouth. "Fine!" Shimmer interrupted me before I could speak, shoving me to the side. "Fine. Just... just don't get too close and don't make sudden movements." She groaned and stomped back to her table, muttering to herself.

I put on a smile. I still didn't fully understand, but... it felt like what Princess would do. "E-everyone?" I said, gesturing. "This is Princess Twilight of Equestria. Tonight we're trying to send her home."

"Yeah, yeah, backstory later!" Shimmer belted out, poking at her phone. "Our window is closing here, so if we could get on with this?"

We briefly reformed our original semicircle, a little more lopsided than before. Princess and Shimmer stood in the middle, in front of the Portal's mouth. "Okay," Princess started. "Some of you are completely new to this, so I'll start from the beginning." Shimmer rolled her eyes at this, but she continued. "When thinking of parallel universes, it's easiest to understand them as giant destiny strings. A universe 'grows' upward through time like a never-ending blade of grass, with all the destiny strings of the people inside it supporting it like the filaments of a rope." I saw several people nodding; the reality was much more complicated, but the "field of grass" model was still how destiny mechanics were taught in most textbooks.

"That's as far as our Star Swirl got," Shimmer continued, taking over. "He imagined the multiverse as a field of mega-strings, growing around and through each other but not able to actually interact. He never figured out how to cross between them, but he did write a paper describing a method that could work if the rules of our universe were a little different, which we guessed is what Equestria's Star Swirl used. Basically, he used magic to punch a hole in reality and then shotgunned energy into the void until he hit something. If he could consistently hit the same spot with the same frequency, it meant the local destiny strings were running exactly parallel, which meant that he could safely form a portal between them." This got some blank looks, so she sighed and clarified. "Imagine trying to build a bridge between two blades of grass growing in different directions. It would work, but not for very long."

"My first attempts at building a portal followed that design," Princess said. "But I quickly realized it wouldn't work. Unlike Equestrian magic, human magic is incredibly personal and almost always invisible - it can't be projected and manipulated like ours can. So even if I'd been able to open a portal, which I couldn't, and even if I'd been able to send energy through, which I couldn't, there's no guarantee that I'd hit the right universe. I'd just end up even further from home, with even less of an idea how to get back.

"My next idea was to use my Element. It's a source of unlimited Equestrian magic, with the same harmonic frequency of my home dimension. I thought that if I could approximately manipulate the local frequencies to match Equestria... I was so sure that it was going to work." She shook her head sadly. "That was the closest I ever got. I managed to reactivate part of the portal and make a hole between realities. But without a complete mirror portal to guide me, all I could do was stare out into the void between worlds. And that was when I realized the truth." Her shoulders slumped. Across the circle, I saw Sunset wince sympathetically. "After the portal was broken, our worlds became unbalanced. This universe has two more destiny strings in it now, and mine has two fewer. Without the mirror to tether them together, they grew further and further apart. We're not parallel any more. Even if I spent the rest of my life tearing random holes in space, there's no way that I could ever find Equestria again." She shivered in recollection, letting a wave of it pass over her. "At least... that's what I thought."

She looked at the ground. We waited for more, but Princess had come to a stop, biting her lip. Lyra waved at her impatiently. "So that's where this mega-portal comes in, right?" she asked.

Shimmer savoured the moment, then looked back at Princess. "Care to enlighten them, your Highness?" she said.

Princess nodded hesitantly. "W-well," she started, "what we've done is combined several of our old theories into a single, cohesive entity. We started with the heated base elements that I'd been using in my old design, which Shimmer expanded to include-"

"Fuck's sake." Shimmer threw up her hands, laughing. "It does nothing. Okay? It does fucking nothing."

There was a pause, the length of a gasp. "What!?" Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash yelled at the same time. "Jinx," Pinkie Pie added, giggling.

"That's not entirely true!" Princess added quickly. "Every little bit adds up."

"Yeah, whatever." Shimmer flung out her arm, gesturing to the great black Portal. "You see this frame? Bullshit. If we've run the numbers right, it'll make it maybe a tenth of a percent more likely to make a portal form. And that's if the numbers are right, which I can guarantee they're not. The boiler? That's half a percent, at most. And the spit? I just made that up. We're only getting one shot at this, so we're throwing everything we've got at the wall, just in case something tips us over the edge. That's it."

Applejack swelled up. "So you're telling me-"

Flash put a hand on her arm, steadying her. She backed down, grumbling to herself. "So what's the big secret?" Flash sighed.

"That's an apt word," Rarity added. "If all of... this isn't your means of getting home, then what is? And why have you been keeping us all in the dark about it?"

Princess fidgeted. "Everyone," she started, "I... I'm sorry that we've been keeping this from you. Shimmer and I agreed..." They shared a look. "...No. It was my idea. And I'm sorry. I wish I could have told you sooner, but I need you to understand..."

She trailed off again. Shimmer smirked. "The problem was that she was trying to follow in Star Swirl's footsteps, creating a portal from scratch," she said. "But she never needed to. She's had a direct line back to her homeworld right in front of her this whole time." She looked at Princess, who was standing statue-still. "Well, go on," Shimmer said. "Show them."

Princess moved, but only slowly. She knelt down and unzipped her travel bag, reaching into a hidden pocket inside it. With careful reverence, she lifted out the Element of Magic.

Right away, Pinkie Pie's hand was in the air. "Buuuuut, didn't you just say...?"

"I wasn't using it right," Princess said. Her words had a cold weight to them. "In this world, the Element of Magic is powered by the emotions of its wielder and those around her. But it only exists at all because of its connection to the physical Elements, the five Elements of Harmony that govern Equestria, without which the Element of Magic can't exist. That link still exists, even between dimensions. If I can just call on that bond and apply it to the broken portal, we should be able to re-establish a connection."

"An unstable connection," Shimmer corrected. "The whole 'growing in different directions' thing I mentioned. And without a way of sustaining it on this end, it'll probably collapse the moment a body enters it. One-way trip."

"Wait, a body?" Spike asked, sounding panicked. "What about me?"

"A body can be anything," Shimmer said dismissively. "Just go in while you're touching. The portal's not gonna care."

"That... sounds fantastic," said Flash cautiously. "So what's the problem?"

"Wait, did that dog just talk?" said Bon Bon. Lyra shushed her.

Princess swallowed hard. "Before, I was using the Element to power the portal," she said. "But Shimmer's plan is different. It's going to become the portal - or at least, this side of it. That means that, even in the best-case scenario, I won't be able to take it with me. But it's much more likely that... when we do this... the Element is going to be destroyed."

There were several noises of shock. "Twilight, you can't," Flash gasped.

"Twilight, you can't!" Sunset cried, much more frantically.

Nearby, Lemon Hearts put up her hand. "I... don't understand why that would be bad," she said.

Flash stepped into the circle. "The Element isn't just a source of magic," he explained. "It's a part of who Twilight is. It's an extension of her crest. It's her destiny." He looked at her pleadingly. "You can't destroy that. Not even for this."

"It's the only way," Princess said quietly.

"It's more than that," Sunset added. "It's the most important magic in Equestria. It's the only thing that stands between them and destruction. You c-can't just go back without it. If you get back and they need your help, then-"

"It's the only way," Princess repeated.

Sunset didn't relent. "What about Discord? Nightmare Moon? Or something even worse, something we don't even know about yet? Equestria needs it, more than it needs you. If you go back without it, you'll only-"

"It's the only way!" Princess shouted. She clenched her eyes shut, making trembling fists. "I don't want this. I'm terrified. But it's the only option I have. Either I go back and leave the Element behind, or I keep it and stay here forever. There's no other choice."

"Twilight..." Flash took a deep breath. "I won't let you do this."

For the first time since I'd known her, Princess glared. "Flash," she said coldly, "if you really care about me, you won't try to stop me."

We collectively took this in. "I... I agree," Fluttershy piped up. We looked at her. "Twilight knows the risks better than anyone," she said. "If this is what it takes for her to go home... then we should respect that."

A few others nodded. "Yeah," Rainbow Dash said. "We trust you, Twilight."

Applejack sighed. "Well, that's that, then. Pretty big risk you're taking."

"I know," Princess said. "You can't understand how much I know that."

Sunset crossed her arms. "I don't agree," she said. "But... I understand." She sighed. "How do we do this?"

"Oh, that's the best part." Shimmer picked up her sledgehammer and twirled it, grinning nastily. "Hey, hands up everyone who can say they've destroyed an all-powerful artifact before."

Princess winced. "Overkill much?" Colgate muttered.

"But first," Princess said, "it needs to be activated."

Before she could say anything else, Pinkie Pie was already swinging around her in a physics-defying hug. "Twilight-you're-my-best-friend-and-I-love-you!" she screamed happily.

"Pinkie, wait-" The protest came too late. In seconds, Princess was buried inside of a smiling, impromptu group hug. "Girls... wait!" She pulled her arms free one by one. "I told you, that's part of the problem. The Element doesn't..." She eyed the girl resting her head on her shoulder. "Do I know you?"

"Does it matter?" Lyra asked.

"Lyra!"

Bon Bon yanked Lyra out of the group, disentangling the girl-cluster. Shimmer rolled her eyes impatiently, but Princess laughed, some colour returning to her. "As I was saying," she went on, "in this dimension, the Element has modified itself to run on essentially human magic, drawing power from its wielder directly. But there's one other condition that causes all the Elements to link together." She raised it up. "A spark."

A second passed, and sounds of dawning realization passed over the group. Some of Princess' friends stepped back. I glanced around, trying to piece together what this meant, only to catch Rainbow Dash staring at me. "You don't mean..." she said.

With the subtlety of butterflies, the gathering parted. Suddenly, I was standing alone. Suddenly, Princess was smiling at me. "Or," she said, "should I say... a sparkle."

I was sharply aware of the amount of empty air around me. My throat was dry. I couldn't breathe. "M-me?" I choked out, far too loud.

"That's right." Princess took a step forward. "It's your destiny."

I took an equal and opposite step back. "No," I blurted out. "I can't be. You're wrong."

"You are." Again she advanced, and again the crown in her hands repulsed me; my own crest, carved so perfectly on its tip, forced waves of nausea through me with its approach. "It was my destiny to awaken and unite the Elements of Harmony," she insisted. "And that means it's your destiny too. You can awaken it, just like I did. I know you can. You're the only person in this whole universe who we know for certain the crown will respond to."

"I can't." I tried to keep backing up, but couldn't; with that phrase she'd tethered me. I knew that if I took one more step away, it could only be to turn and flee. "That's not my destiny any more," I pleaded, shrinking away as she brought the hateful crown closer. "I'm not like you. I don't know anything about friendship."

"Neither did I," she countered. "But that doesn't matter. All it takes is one moment. One spark. That's all anyone needs to change everything."

She was right in front of me now, holding her Element up to me. I could feel it pulsing, like a second heart, every beat inflicting another wave of agitation on me. "Twilight," she said, more quietly, "you're the only way I can get home. Won't you try?"

She asked as if I had a choice. I was already reaching out, already accepting my fate. "I can't," I protested one last time, even as my fingers wrapped around the metal.

"You can." And then she withdrew, leaving the cold weight of the crown in my hands.

I tried to breathe. The unnatural heat of the Portal sucked at me, but I felt cold. Cold and alone, in a way that I hadn't understood was possible until now. The star I held pulsed yet again, cutting into me. I couldn't bear to look at it. Hesitantly, I drew my eyes away from the ground. Everyone was watching me. Princess was at the front, her hands clasped, her smile confident. Flash and Shining stood at her back, the boys I'd loved and lost. My study group was on her right, beaming encouragement; her best friends on her left, only slightly less so. Sunset peered at me from behind her bangs, grinning shyly, and even Shimmer - Shimmer, of all people - held no malice in her smirk. She did, however, make a meaningful glance down at her wrist. "That's the spirit," she said, with only a bare trace of sarcasm. "Now why don't you make with the friendship..." She grabbed Sunset and shoved her toward me, almost sending her double sprawling. "...and we can finally finish this." Her voice hardened. "Don't keep us waiting."

Sunset and I stared at each other. My hands shook, and she turned pale, looking just as scared as I felt. Everyone was watching us - watching me - watching and waiting, waiting for me to fix everything, waiting as time ran out. Seconds burrowed into my skin as I stood and shivered and sweated, using up all of my mental faculties just to keep standing straight. Panic threatened to burst out of me at any moment. I had no idea what they wanted, let alone what to do, and time was passing, and I was ruining everything, and-

Okay.

Okay.

Deep breaths, Twilight. You'll figure this out.

I put a hand to my chest and swung it out as I exhaled, like I'd seen Colgate once do. It wasn't much, but it made me feel a little better.

A spark.

Reluctantly, I forced myself to examine the crown I was holding. Cold, hard, delicate. I couldn't feel it through my fingers, yet some part of me still insisted that it was pulsing; piercing me, filling me, scanning me. Its star-shaped tip lazily reflected light up at me, terrifyingly familiar and yet, at the same time, hauntingly alien.

Was I supposed to put it on? Unleash everything I'd been holding in and use its power to show them all the scarred, vengeful monster that I truly was? It chilled me, but there was something undeniably tempting about the thought. To abandon all pretense and lay myself bare, show all the people depending on me the truth of who I really was. Liar. Poisoner. Rapist. A dangerous monster, fit only to be hunted down and killed, leaving everyone else's lives better without me. It seemed antithetical to friendship, sure, but wasn't this how fairy tales were supposed to end? With the slaying of a monster?

But no. If I was understanding this right, my job here was to recreate the original spark that had brought the Element to life. To reset it to factory conditions, in a way. That meant that, as tempting as it was, I couldn't steal the magic that the original Twilight had imbued into the crown. I had to discover it for myself.

The magic... of friendship. Right.

I returned my gaze to Sunset.

She'd stood statue-still while I'd gathered my thoughts, her hands frozen mid-wring. Her mouth jittered, trying to smile and utterly failing. I was sure that we looked similar; there was a certain nauseating poetry to it. I tried my best to pity her. I tried. Honest, I tried.

I'd loved her. I'd done enough reflecting that I could admit that. We'd played together, learned together, grown together. I'd experienced friendship with her, true friendship, and in return, she'd broken me. She could apologize all she wanted, she could beg and plead and shower me with attention, but she couldn't take back what she'd done. Just forcing myself to look at her was sending hot flashes of pain and rage through me; what personal revelation was I supposed to have that would lead to us ever being friends again?

And it wasn't that I didn't understand. Intellectually, I understood. It didn't take a princess to know that, from a purely objective standpoint, being friends was superior to not being friends. We could emotionally support each other, work through our issues together. Revisit old times. Learn to trust again. With just one action, one tiny moment of acceptance from me, things could go right back to the way they were before.

I ran my tongue over dry lips. "Sun..." I said, inaudible, and got no further.

But if I did this, I asked myself, wouldn't I just be going down the same path that Princess did? It had already taken me everything I had simply to not attack her; I certainly wasn't going to forgive her. Any offer of friendship I made now would and could only be a lie. And then what? Years of swallowing my hatred, pretending everything was okay until I finally learned to stomach her? I wasn't sure that I could last that long, and even if I did, I'd already seen that it would forever taint any real friendship we somehow managed to wring from the experience.

But then, wasn't that the lesson? That no price is too high for friendship? And what could be a greater act of friendship than enduring years of agony for the sake of another person? After all that had happened, did I really deserve anything else?

I willed my feet to move. One step, two steps, but no further. Any closer and Sunset and I could have reached out and brushed fingertips. I tried to meet her gaze. She was-

-standing over me at the end of the corridor, leaning down as I tried to burrow into the corner, my arm thrown protectively over my head. "Look at me when I'm talking to you," she said with a laugh, pushing me back so my tear-streaked face was in full view.

All I could do was shiver. Sunset's friends clustered around her, blocking us in, with the shortest acting as a lookout. Sunset's face was inches from mine, her smirk filling my world. "My boyfriend tells me you've been staring at him," she said, loud enough that the whole hallway could hear. I squeaked and paled before I could stop myself; I knew that she couldn't have known, but she didn't have to, not when my stupid expressions told her everything. "Get real," she laughed, shoving me back again. "Everyone knows what you're into, you freak. Why don't you just disappear and stop creeping out the rest of us?"

Her friends cackled, and Sunset smashed her hand into my shoulder, bruising the back of my arm against the edge of a locker. "And if I ever catch you looking at my property again," she hissed, "maybe I'll run and tell Celestia all about how my 'best friend ever' put her own brother in the hospital when she couldn't screw him." Then she whirled away, leaving her followers to shower me with the confetti of my astrology notes as I sat and wept.

-standing with her head down, looking pale and exhausted, trembling as I drew near. She was so thin that her beloved jacket from years gone by still fit her perfectly, unchanged, but in my mind's eye I could see outlined ribs and mottled scars. "Sunset," I said.

She looked up at me. Something glinted in her eyes. "Twilight," she whispered.

The pulsing of the Element filled me, faster, harder. I can do this. So much promise, so much power. I turned it around in my hands. It's easy. Princess did it. Easy.A deep, sick feeling squirmed up through my stomach. They're only words. I can say them. I could save her. I could change her. I could change everything.

"Say it!" someone screeched. Was it someone around me? Did it come from inside my head?

"I..." I swallowed hard. My head was swimming. "I..."

Shimmer smirked.

My eyes shut tight. My brain shut down. The sickening air spread down my limbs and for one glorious moment I felt absolutely nothing at all.

I inhaled. My resolve tightened. Self-sacrifice was one thing... but like hell was I going through with this if it gave that jerk the slightest satisfaction. If Shimmer approved, then it couldn't be real friendship. It just couldn't be. There had to be another way.

I opened my eyes. Turning pointedly away from Sunset, I looked to my study group.

Friends. I'd called them that, and it hadn't been a conscious lie. By Princess' logic, I was already past where I needed to be. I had friends. Lyra, Twinkleshine, Bon Bon, Lemon Hearts, Colgate; they were all watching me with pride in their eyes. In a strange way, they'd come to the edge of the world for me. And why? Because... because I was their friend. And for them, that was enough.

What was I supposed to be feeling when I thought of that? Grateful? Overwhelmed? I hadn't asked them to come for me. They were risking their lives just by standing close, and for... for what? Just for the chance that it would make me feel better? All I felt right now was scared, guilty, queasy at the thought that I was responsible for anything that might happen to them. My feelings obviously weren't worth the risk. I obviously wasn't worth it. Why was I the only one who was able to see that?

My mind stopped short - some inner equivalent of a scratched disk.

I wondered silently if, if our situations had been reversed, I would go to the edge of the world for one of them. I barely hesitated. Of course I would. A numbers game had nothing to do with it; they were worth it. Yes, between them they could be petty, they could be liars, stubborn troublemakers, messy, gross, rude, gay, and honestly, a couple of them were kind of dumb. But they still deserved my help - just for being present, just for being human. That was Ethics 101 right there: Show kindness to others, no matter what. No matter what.

So why, I forced myself to ask, was it so different when they showed that same kindness to me?

Deep breaths. Deep breaths.

The thought was poison. The thought was pain. But I closed my eyes and forced myself to turn away. One step forward, two steps forward, push everything else out. When I opened my eyes, Princess was in front of me.

I looked at her- I looked at me.

This strange, outcast girl who'd wandered into everyone's lives and changed everything. So badly hurt. So alone. So jealous of everyone around her. She thought so little of herself - even though she was so kind and beautiful and incredible that it made my heart hurt. When she looked at herself, all she could see was flaws. If she could only see herself the way I saw her-

If I could only see myself-

She gasped as my arms snapped around her, pulling her tight to my chest. "We're the same," I whispered. "The same. And I'm... I'm ready to accept that." Unbidden, tears came. "I don't want to be. But I am. That's how friendship works, right?"

"Twilight..." she began. I put a finger to her lips.

"I know I have friends. That's what you wanted me to see. But there was someone else I needed to settle things with first. Someone we both needed to meet." I put my forehead against hers. "Thank you for being a mirror for me. Without you, I never could have met... myself."

She nodded. Now or never. In a swift motion I placed the crown onto my head, leaned in, and whispered to myself something that I knew I needed to hear:

"You deserve to be loved."

Then everything went white.

Light. So much light. Someone was shouting.

I could feel them. All of them. Individual points of light, streaming in every direction, piercing into me. Awe, fear, but above all love, pouring into me from every angle - so alien and intense that it was practically agony. I writhed in it, building up shields only to feel them wither away under the pressure. Someone was shouting.

I opened my eyes. I was floating off the ground. Light surrounded me, almost blinding me - I could feel it floating down through my hair and my arms. Beams of light radiated off of my crown, spinning and slowly focusing. Someone was shouting.

I felt... strong. I lifted an arm experimentally. A chunk of ground came with it. It felt... good. The auras around me flickered and changed. Someone was shouting.

Someone was shouting. Oh. Right.

"Wake the fuck up!" Shimmer screamed at me. One of the beams of light intersected the Portal, which began to glow. "Now! Give it to me now!"

I plucked the crown from my head and clumsily tossed it. The moment it left my fingers the light died and I plummeted back to earth, landing in Twinkleshine's waiting arms. The solid beams of light persisted as Shimmer caught the crown, more and more of them focusing on the brightening Portal. In a flurry of motion she positioned herself, tossed the crown into the air, caught her sledgehammer as Pinkie Pie threw it to her.

And then, as the beams focused and the crown began to glow, Shimmer smashed it into the Portal with all her might.