Observations in Technicolor

by Nny11

Rating: everyone
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Rarity, Other, Comedy, Human
Length: 1959

Rarity learns the difference between complaining and whining from her mother.

While waiting in line to receive her yearly school supplies Rarity finds herself learning a rather colorful lesson about the differences between whining and complaining from her mother.

This is a humanized story in an alternate universe, so please be aware before you dive in! Also, I’d be happy to get some feedback on what you think of this “version” of the world.

Published 2012-04-16 16:54:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-04-16 16:54:00 UTC

Chapter 1

[Rarity][Pearl]
PG-13 (for a bad word, tobacco habits, and bad fashion choices)
General/Humor

Summary: Rarity learns the difference between complaining and whining from her mother.

AN: Why yes this is a humanized alternate universe, why do you ask? Also, Pearl is really the star here as Rarity is more of an observer, but you’ll notice some similarities between them as I took liberties with Pearl and changed her for the purposes of this story. (See Pearl is ooc) I’m mostly having fun playing around with the world here, so feel free to leave me some comments on what you think of it.

Disclaimer: My Little Pony Friendship is Magic belongs firmly to Hasbro and not me; this is just for entertainment folks!

EDIT: I would love to know what people think of this story, if you have any constructive feedback I'd be happy to get it. And if you down vote let me know why. Without meaningful feedback I can't improve.

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Rarity stood in line with her mother and watched in mild horror as an old woman in front of them managed to fling her spit into the gutter with pin point accuracy. Rarity was sure it was an acquired skill that the crone had developed over years from her use of chewing tobacco; after all just a few months ago Rarity had been dared into a spitting contest and had ended up with nothing more to show for it then a wet chin. While the entire act still disgusted her, Rarity now had a sort of respect for those who could hurl their spit and make it look easy. It was something of a gift that the young girl could see the skill and beauty in nearly anything, even at uncouth act such as spitting.

Her mother tugged at her hand and gave a short reproachful glare at the old woman. The line was hardly moving, but Pearl insisted that they take every inch given to them with a sort of zealous ferocity that left Rarity impressed.

So she shuffled a small bit forward.

Stableside had been having a heat wave for the last two weeks. It had been the cause of great ire among the Mages and Terran citizens, and a lot of headaches for the Seraph tending the skies. After all it wasn’t their fault that national weather required the heat wave, they were just doing a job, it will get better when it ends, please stop sending complaints. It was getting to the point where the sky folk were practically hiding away in their homes just to avoid the onslaught of questions and demands. What it meant in the end was a lot of sweat and sunburns, without even the hope of a stray passing cloud. The small town’s mood had been slowly declining as the heat continued, and the tension between everyone was high. It always got bad when the weather wasn’t ideal.

Stableside is a small coastal town on the edge of the misleadingly named Eternal Crossing. About an hour long boat ride across the “Eternal Crossing” would land you in Seaddle, or you could catch a train head north and get to Hoofington in roughly an hour and a half. Stableside was mostly known for the high quality boats they could produce, although many people seemed to think they had good fishing. In the summers you could tell who the tourists were simply by watching to see who went fishing. Not that Rarity needed that, sandals and sock or loud floral patterned shirts were a dead giveaway. While this building industry made it mostly a Terran town, Mages had come down as well to form the Stableside Academy of Magic and set up a local Covenant for all eighty of their kind. This was the main reason that Rarity had been standing in line, in the direct sunlight with her mother for the last two hours.

“At this rate I don’t know if they’ll have any supplies left!” Pearl huffed in annoyance and tugged her daughter forward another few inches. “I swear they need to advertise less or supply more.”

Rarity rolled her eyes. It was the same thing every year; they would get up extra early and gather their paperwork to prove their neediness before walking across town to the dispensary. It never seemed to matter what time they arrived at, there was always a long line formed and her mother would complain the whole way to the front. There was always a bag of supplies for them to get, the benefit of a small population of Mages was that Rarity was always guaranteed one of the free bags. It was the hundreds of needy Earthers that often would stand in line for hours only to be turned away in the end. Not that getting a bag was even all that great, the academy required many expensive items for use in potions, incantations, and summonings; none of which were ever included in the bag. They would throw in things like molted Seraph feathers instead of griffon, bottles of diluted clouds, vials which claimed to be dragon blood but was often merely imp blood—it just went on and on like that. Knock offs, cheap, diluted, rubbish that was passed off as equal.

Rarity would have refused a bag completely if it wasn’t for the fact that such an ungrateful act would earn her a long scolding and lecture from first her mother and then a much angrier version from her father. Money was one of those issues that she was told not to discuss with them and yet was often stuck being told about or forced to overhear as another large argument over it reverberated easily in her room. After the first few years of complaining that the bags weren’t high quality Rarity had learned to simply be quiet and be grateful to get one at all. The rest of her school supplies had to be borrowed from a classmate or were donated to the family from the Covenant. In the end she never had enough for quality performances, but she always had enough to slide by.

Pearl nearly dragged her daughter forward again as a few people in front of them gave up hope and left the line. “Well we’ve almost made it now, and that is something to be grateful for!” She ran her free hand through her stripped purple hair, and delicately fanned herself. “I swear this is the worst year yet, I wish they’d just count the remainder up and let us know how many more there are. It’d give us a much better sense of whether we should stay or go. And I do wish they would provide some water for us, maybe some shade could help to stave off all this heat! Is it truly that difficult I wonder to find a few unused awnings or umbrellas? I mean I understand that we can’t really do this indoors and that they couldn’t line the whole route every year, but perhaps a few scattered along hmmm? That would provide a little ‘bright’ spot to the waiting!” Pearl gave a small chuckle at her own joke.

Without warning the old woman in front of them whirled around and glared at Pearl. Rarity noticed that the woman wore a pair of coke bottle glasses, which were horn rimmed, and where there used to be rhinestones there was now a series of pock marks; the glasses however hideous themselves were connected to a beautiful cord of beads. They were clear with splashes of colors throughout, connected with shining pewter rods and golden bands. It could have been very classy on its own.

“Yew lisen here yew beetch we all been staning here an I am sick to deaf of hearin yew whine!” She punctuated her screeching demand with another wad of brown tinted spit that crashed onto the side walk and splattered onto both Rarity and Pearl’s shoes.

Rarity danced backwards slightly and fought the urge to fling her shoes away in disgust.

Pearl glared back at the old woman and slowly lowered her head as she spoke, “Mother Madam, my daughter is here as are many other children and I will not—I repeat, I will not tolerate such language around them! If you wish to behave boorishly with your chewing habit, affinity for cursing, and not to mention the all too detectable scent of your unwashed self I will ask you to leave myself.” Pearl snapped her head back up. “And for your information I was not whining, I was complaining. You want to hear whining? THIS is WHiNiNg! Oh WHHHAAAA, the sun is MUCH TOO HOT and my FEET are TIRED! I spent AaAaAllllll morning standing behind a BRUTE and a SLOB, and I’m THIiIiIiIiIrstyyyyyy! And Wh-hi-hi-hhhhhhyyyyy don’t they hurry up? I am DYING over here, eeeewaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh! And now, after all of this, I am being assaulted by some total stranger! My daughter is being ASSUALTED by some TOTAL STRANGER! It’s not FAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIR!”

Rarity watched with equal parts horror and glee as the older woman’s eyes nearly bugged out of her head, her hands flew up in front of herself in a weak attempt to stop the many pairs of eyes that turned her way. Her mouth hung open awkwardly displaying her stained teeth and the wad of chew stuffed in her cheek. “Shhhhhhh! Lahdy, keep it dawn nah! No need to geeh nobady else involved.”

“Involved? Of course I need others involved, I’m a whinny witch and I NEED THE ATTENTION, since my DAUGHTER WAS SPIT ON!!” Pearl dramatically flung one hand across her brow, and clutched at her heart with the other.

“Hokay, hokay, I’m sorry for the spit, jus stop that!” The crone’s eyes were swiveling around at the crowd in desperation.

“Not to me, I want an apology for my daughter! And I want you to make up for your foul language too!”

“Are yew serious!?”

“AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHhahahahahahahahahaha, she SPIT ON MY DAUGHTER!!!” Pearl looked fit to fling herself down onto the road as tears jumped to her eyes on command.

“HOKAY! Nice gihrl, I am sorry fer all my language and for the sp-hit. Here,” the older woman ripped off the cord around her glasses and held it out, “for yew, a nice thin for a nice gihrl.”

Rarity glanced first at her mother who had frozen in place to hear the apology (one hand still flung over her brow and mouth twisted into a mock despair), before looking back at the other woman. “Thank you very much for the kind gift ma’am, it’s very pretty. But I don’t need it. Apology accepted.”

The older woman twitched and glanced at Pearl who straightened up and was fixing her hair.

“That’s my darling little Rarity, she’s a generous person you know, and she never likes to deprive others. Well I think your apology is accepted by both of us madam, please watch your language in the future around children.” Pearl reached down and picked up her daughter’s hand again. Before looking back ahead as if nothing had occurred at all.

Rarity bit her lip to stifle her laughter as the old woman tried to decide if her mother had meant it all or not. After a moment’s hesitation she turned back around to face the front of the line her head shook back and forth but she held her tongue.

As a few giggles slipped past her lips Rarity glanced up at her mother who winked back down at her. “Well I do say it seems like we’re moving faster now too! Would you just look at all this progress, funny how it always happens when one is not paying attention.”