Chapters This is the story of six individuals venturing in the unknown part of the Ever- free forest to find out the existence of the legendary Bigfoot. The following footage is all that remains of their ordeal. WARNING- This film contains of screaming, galloping, eating, giggling, singing, crying, wild creatures, out-housing, and dry rubbing. Viewer's Discretion is advised.
A camera turns on to focus on a yellow-coated Pegasus with a light pink mane and teal colored eyes.
"Wow, Fluttershy," A grinning cyan blue Pegasus with a rainbow colored mane stood behind her holding a camera of her own. "You sure look tiny on film."
Fluttershy places her camera inside a tree so that it would remain half-hidden. "Do you think this looks okay Rainbow Dash?" The Shyer Pegasus asked.
"Sure, it looks fine," Rainbow Dash said. "Thanks for helping me with this for the Young Pony Film Festival. We're gonna win for sure!"
Fluttershy smiled kindly at her childhood friend. "Anything to help out a friend. It's been a while since we did something special together."
Rainbow dash flew over and handed Fluttershy her camera. "Alright now, Fluttershy, I need you to follow me and document every single detail of everything that comes our way. No matter what happens, don't stop filming. Got it?"
Fluttershy nodded in affirmation. "Got it. Ready?" The camera switched on, and Rainbow Dash smiled at the camera confidently.
"Rainbow Dash here, standing less than 20 feet away from where got a glimpse of Bigfoot's leg!" She held up a photo of a hairy leg in the corner which was covered in plastic. "Me and my pal Fluttershy are going to prove its very existence in the Everfree forest when nopony else could. And that's not all." Rainbow Dash flew up and pulled out a large chicken leg out of a nearby tree. "We put tracking devices in chicken legs just like this one, and we placed them around all around our campsite."
"Um, Rainbow?"
"Yeah?"
"Those aren't... real chicken legs, are they?"
Rainbow Dash smiled and rolled her eyes. "Of course not. They're rubber. I just filled it applesauce so that he would eat it". Fluttershy sighed in relief. "Oh...wait, what?" SNAP! Both mares jumped in surprise. There was a sudden rustling sound in the trees. Fluttershy gasped and whirled around, the camera focusing on the moving trees. "W- What was that?!!?" suddenly, they heard voices.
"Sugar Cube, I think we're lost."
"Of course we are, silly! That was the whole point!"
"I wish the map didn't get wet, because how are we 'supposed to know how to get back to where we came from?"
"That's easy! We'll just follow the stars!"
"…It's the middle of the day."
Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash looked at each other in awe. They knew those voices! Together, they trotted to a clearing behind the rustling trees in front of the two familiar ponies. One had a light pink coat and a poofy, bouncy dark pink mane with blue eyes. The other pony had a light orange coat with green eyes, and a cowgirl hat resting on top of her blonde mane.
"Pinkie Pie? Applejack? What are you two doing here?" Rainbow Dash's rose-colored eyes widened in shock, not just because the party pony and the Apple Farmer where here in the forest as well, but at the sight of pinkie's wild mane holding a video camera on its own, which was pointed at both her and Fluttershy. Both Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy wondered in their heads how this came to be, but they knew better than to question it.
Applejack looked surprised too. "Shoot, we could say the same thing! What are Ya'll doing here?" Applejack asked in her sweet southern accent.
"Well, if you must know, we're tracking down Bigfoot for the Young Pony Film Festival contest." Said Rainbow.
Pinkie Pie let out an excited gasp. "You're looking for Bigfoot?! That's so cool! AND, we're participating in the Young Pony Film Festival too!"
Applejack gave a shrug. "I'm helping Pinkie find a new variety of apples that are rumored to be growin' in the unknown part of the Ever free Forest." She narrowed her eyes at the Pegasi. "But Bigfoot? Really? Rainbow Dash I could understand, but Fluttershy? Even if this so-called Bigfoot exists, you wouldn't be nervous at all if Y'all should encounter him?"
Fluttershy beamed behind the camera she was holding. "Oh, no, I've actually always wanted to meet Bigfoot… if he exists that is… and if he does, I bet he's really gentle and sweet once you get to know him… he's just misunderstood, that's all."
"Hey!" Pinkie suddenly exclaimed. "Why don't we tag along with you guys? We haven't had the best of luck with finding apples, but it would be so much fun if we could tag along with you as we go! Don't you think, Applejack?"
AJ shrugged. "I don't see why not. We're already lost. Might as well be lost together."
Rainbow Dash nodded. "Alright then, we'll let you tag along. Our success will be twice as documented!" She said with a big grin. "C'mon!" Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy started to fly in front of them, and Pinkie and Applejack followed.
"This is gonna be so much fun, Applejack," Pinkie squealed, turning her camera towards the cow pony while they walked. "Finding rare apples and finding Bigfoot on the same day!"
The Blonde mare looked at Pinkie with a blank expression. "Pinkie Pie, I'd hate to rain on your parade, but there is no Bigfoot. He just doesn't exist, Sugar cube. It's most likely that Rainbow Dash is pulli'n one over us. She's probably got poor Fluttershy roped into this too."
The Party Pony thought hard. "Well… maybe it does seem like a prank that Dashie would pull… but that doesn't explain why she would risk losing the competition. You know how much she likes to win."
Applejack's eyebrows knitted together as she looked toward the sky. "True. But Rainbow Dash is mischievous. Not stupid." Pinkie Pie suddenly gave Applejack a cavalier grin.
"Well, in that case," she grabbed the farm pony and trained the camera on the two of them. "We should both be on camera for this. This is important!"
They heard Rainbow Dash shout in the distance. "Come on you slow-pokes!"
Pinkie Pie turned back to the camera which was being held be her tail. "What's more interesting than a documentary about finding Bigfoot?"
Applejack raised an eyebrow. "Having a tea party with Tirek?" Pinkie chuckled. "No, you silly goose! A documentary about a prank documentary about Bigfoot…that gets busted!"
Applejack frowned. "Pass."
Pinkie pie wrapped a fore hoof around her fellow earth pony. "Oh, think about it, AJ. You and me… Apple Jacquelyn Smith and Pinkamena Diane Pie… two could-be cousins, prank busters! We could start our own T.V. show and everything!"
Applejack sighed. "Fine. As long as you edit my full name out of the video, I'll do it."
"Come on guys, we're almost there!"
The group of colorful ponies arrived at Fluttershy Rainbow Dash’s impressive campsite.
“Awesome, right?” Rainbow dash flew down next to where Applejack and Pinkie Pie were sitting. “Got it all set up in ten seconds flat.” Pinkie Pie grinned.
“I wouldn’t doubt you for one of those seconds, Dashie.” She turned her camera to Applejack who was chowing down on blueberries that the pegasi brought with them. Applejack looked up at the camera and shrugged.
“What? I’m starved!” Pinkie Pie suddenly gasped.
“Look!”
She rushed over to a nearby bush and picked up a blue apple with gold stripes. A.J. walked over to Pinkie and nodded in approval.
“Good work, Pinkie Pie. I reckon I never seen an apple like that before. What do you want to call it?” The pink mare thought hard.
“Hmmm… I think I’ll name it… birthday surprise!!” She turned to Applejack and narrowed her eyes. “Don’t eat it, Applejack!”
There was a sudden growl coming from a bush behind them. Rainbow dash quickly peeked outside the bushes and gasped.
“Holy cow!” She gestured for Pinkie to come over with her camera. “He’s real!” she whispered. Pinkie poked her camera lens through the bushes and saw a tall hairy figure roaming through the forest. “Are you guys seeing this?” Rainbow could barely contain her excitement.
“Omigoshomigoshomigosh!!” Pinkie whispered. She turned the camera towards Applejack who was crouching behind a tree. She was glaring angrily at the party pony.
“Pinkie, if we get out of here alive, I will kill you.”
STATIC
Rainbow dash walked cautiously ahead of them through the forest where they spotted the hairy creature with Pinkie Pie filming her from behind. The energetic pony shook her head.
“She’s gonna get eaten, Applejack. Then we’re gonna get eaten… we’re doomed! ” The farm Pony took a deep breath.
“Now, just hold on a minute Pinkie, just calm down. I’m sure there’s an exclamation for all this.” Pinkie Pie suddenly straightened up with an angry look on her face.
“Where’s Fluttershy?”
“She’s gathering timber.”
“Wrong! She just changed into a giant dog suit and came around that corner with a big fake emu over her shoulder!” Applejack looked wary.
“That wasn't an emu.”
Pinkie grinned. “This is brilliant, Applejack. We are going to expose this prank if it’s the last thing we do!” The blonde mare crawled over to Pinkie.
“Fine… fine, but there are still bears out here, Pinkie. Probably Timberwolves too. Timberwolves that don’t take kindly to apples.”
“Hey.”
Both ponies jumped, and cried out in alarm. Rainbow Dash was hovering over them holding a camera. “Heh heh… sorry, but I don’t have a long enough lens, and Bigfoot won’t come out of the cave. I think we need to get closer.” Pinkie Pie perked up.
“Um, actually, Dashie, I think we should head back to your camp to get more supplies and come back with Fluttershy.” She said slyly.
Applejack nodded. “Power in numbers.”
Rainbow sighed. “Alright, fine. We better not lose him though.” Applejack smiled at Rainbow giving her a look.
“Don’t worry Rainbow. Plus, Fluttershy will be able to speak the creature’s language.”
The multi-colored Pegasus nodded. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. Let’s go.”
“Gee, I wonder where Fluttershy could be”, Pinkie said loudly as the trio trotted back towards camp. “I don’t see her anywhere!” Fluttershy then burst through the trees, breathless.
“I’m here! I’m here!”
Applejack raised an eyebrow. “Where’s the firewood, Fluttershy?”
Fluttershy caught her breath. “Well, um, I was… I was gathering the firewood when… when I heard a scream coming from the other direction.” She pointed her hoof to her left. Rainbow Dash grinned, pointing her camera at Fluttershy.
“Oh, yeah? Guess what we freaking saw?” Fluttershy looked at the cyan Pegasus curiously.
“What?”
Rainbow paused for dramatic effect. “It. Dude, it trudged towards that cave!” Fluttershy’s face brightened up.
“Really? Oh, how wonderful!” Pinkie Pie, who was filming the whole exchange, spoke up in an over exaggerated voice.
“But we didn’t want you to miss anything, Fluttershy. We figured that we would all go back together… as a group… so we can see each other.” Fluttershy smiled at Pinkie.
“Oh, how thoughtful of you. Thank you.”
“Wait till ya see it Fluttershy!” Rainbow Boasted. “C’mon, I show you were we saw it. Be right back guys!” As the two Pegasi disappeared into the bushes, Pinkie pie, with her camera in her hair began trotting towards their tent.
“They’re probably making a new plan because we’re onto them,” she said as she unzipped the entrance of the tent. “A.J., I’m going to snoop around this tent, okay? Be my lookout!” Applejack nodded.
“Okay.”
Pinkie Pie sorted thought her friends things while filming. “Daring do books… sleeping bags… a teddy bear… laptop!” Pinkie opened the laptop and on the screen was footage of the campsite. “Oh, you’re good, girls,” Pinkie whispered in a serious tone. “You’re good.” The mare searched farther until she came across a device that looked like a game boy. On the screen were three big circles and a dot that was blinking. “Wait a minute, who’s the dot? I’m the dot?” Pinkie then heard a growling and moaning noise along the outside of the tent. “What was that?!?” The noise grew closer and closer to the tent. The dot was beeping faster by the second. “A –Applejack? What’s goin’ on out there?” The groaning continued. Pinkie’s voice got higher. “Talk to me, Applejack! Applejack?!?” Fortunately, Applejack herself entered the tent. The noise was coming from her. “A.J.!” Pinkie whined. “What the heck!” The farm pony appeared to be munching on the inside of a rubber chicken.
“In a tree. Crazy, right? It’s still warm!” Applejack smiled wide as she happily continued eating.Pinkie put two and two together and looked at her friend warily.
“I think that chicken leg was meant for Bigfoot, Applejack. They must have set up some foot traps with tracking devices! Man, they are really committing to this prank!” Applejack’s eyes widened.
“Wait, I just swallowed the transmitter, Pinkie! What if I’m allergic to this stuff?”
“Don’t worry, A.J., it’ll come out the other way soon.”
“What?”
They suddenly heard Rainbow Dash’s voice from a distance. “All right, you guys, ready to make history?” The two earth ponies jumped in surprise and scrambled out of the tent.
“Get rid of that thing!” Pinkie hissed.
STATIC
The four ponies sat together around some firewood. It was starting to get dark. Applejack gave a shrug.
“I rarely eat cherry changas. If it’s there at the table, sure, I’ll partake. But chances are, something else is gonna grab me.”
“Well, then you just haven’t had a great cherry changa,” Pinkie pointed out.
Rainbow Dash scrunched her nose. “Eh, good cherry changa, bad cherry changa, bottom line, it’s just plain messy, period.”
Pinkie thought about this and nodded slowly. “True.”
Fluttershy timidly spoke up. “Um… I’m sorry to interrupt, but… Well, I kind of need to go to the little fillies room… so to speak.”
“Alright,” Rainbow said. “Just make it quick. I’ll hold the camera.” As Fluttershy left, Rainbow trained the camera to the two earth ponies who stood up. “Fluttershy may not have the strongest bladder,” Rainbow said with a smirk. “But she can hold a hoof stand for a whole forty-five minutes.”
Pinkie nodded. “Wow, that’s something!” She gave Applejack a nudge. Applejack nodded violently.
“Yeah, uh, we um, have to go too!”
“Yeah, we gotta go number 1”.
“We are gonna catch her putting on the costume, Applejack!” Pinkie declared while the two cautiously followed the shy Pegasus through the forest. “We’re gonna hide, and get everything on camera. And then, we’ll keep playing along!”
Applejack smiled. “Alright. This is actually kind of fun.” They turned a few corners, and found their friend with her back toward them. They could detect a slight hiss from where she was standing. Applejack’s eyes narrowed. “Pinkie, she looks like she’s doing her business.”
The Party pony looked confused. “Where’s the big furry dog suit?” Applejack face-hoofed. “We’re filming a pony that is going to the bathroom, Pinkie. This isn’t right.”
Fluttershy, after finishing, turned around. “W–Who’s there?” She called out tremulously. “I have pony spray! I-I mean… I’m a black belt!” Applejack rolled her eyes as she and Pinkie came out from hiding to meet their friend. Fluttershy sighed in relief. “What are you guys doing here?”
“We had to go too,” Pinkie said.
“Oh. We should probably get back to Rainbow Dash then—“
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!”
“RAINBOW DASH!” they cried.
The three ponies galloped as fast as they could back to camp and they found Rainbow Dash on the ground. “What happened?” Pinkie asked frantically.
“He’s here!” Rainbow gasped.
“Who? Who’s here?” Applejack asked as she and Fluttershy helped the Pegasus to her feet while still holding on to her camera.
“Who do you think!?!”
GRRRRUGHHH!!!!
The big hairy creature from earlier appeared out of nowhere started to charge toward the ponies. “AAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!” They all cried, and stared running as fast as they could. Both cameras shook as the group of friends tore through the forest, screaming.
“Omigoshomigoshomigoshomigosh!!” Rainbow kept shouting. Applejack suddenly tripped over a tree branch and tumbled behind some trees. She was finally able to stop herself and stood up, panting.
“Applejack!” Fluttershy called. “Are you okay?” Applejack took several deep breaths.
“I’m Okay. I’m Okay!” She shouted to the others. She suddenly stumbled backwards and fell into a hole. “Whoa!” She cried.
CRASH
“Applejack!” Pinkie rushed over to the hole the farm pony fell into with her camera. It was pitch black, but Pinkie could just barely make out her friend’s blonde hair at the bottom. She could hear her breathing too. “Wow, you’re tough as nails, Applejack!”
The Element of Honesty groaned. “I can’t say I feel 100% right now, Pinkie.” The Pink pony smiled encouragingly. “Look on the bright side! We lost the monster and everyone lived. Even Fluttershy!”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing!”
“Can ya’ll please get me out of here?”
“Sure thing, A.J.!” Pinkie chirped. She turned to Fluttershy. “I have some rope in my saddle sack.” Fluttershy nodded and opened pinkie saddle sack with her mouth. “Hey Dashie, could ya give us a hoof please?” No answer. “Dashie?” A groan came from behind them. Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy turned to find the cyan pony on her stomach with a heavy tree branch on one of her wings. Both ponies gasped at the sight of their friend.
“Oh, Rainbow Dash.” Fluttershy said as she flew over to Rainbow. Pinkie put down the camera and helped Fluttershy lift the tree off of Dash.
“Are you okay, Rainbow Dash?” Pinkie asked. Rainbow cringed.
“Been better. I’ll live though.” Fluttershy wrapped a blanket around the cyan Pegasus.
“As soon a we get Applejack out of the whole, I’ll look at your wing.” She said kindly. Rainbow nodded. Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy both rushed over to the hole to aid the southern pony. “Catch the flashlight, Applejack!” Fluttershy called, as she tossed it down the whole.
Down below, Applejack caught it and turned it on and Pinkie picked up the camera once more and filmed the whole process. The Farm pony sighed in relief as light flooded the whole. Then she realized that she was not alone. On each side, there were two dead ponies lying beside her. Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy gasped in horror. Applejack screamed.
STATIC
“Ow, ow, ow, that stings!” Rainbow dash complained as Fluttershy poured alcohol on her wing. Fluttershy continued to clean Rainbow’s wound.
“It’s supposed to kill the bacteria, Rainbow. You don’t want to get infected. Just a little longer, then I’ll wrap it up.” The wounded pony sighed.
Applejack spoke up. “Uh, I don’t want to cause anymore alarm, but, am I the only one concerned about the two corpses in the hole?” The pointed her bandaged fore hoof towards where she fell earlier.
“It seems obvious to me,” Pinkie said. “Bigfoot did this, no question about it. It’s only a matter of time before he comes back to his pantry for snack time.”
Applejack frowned. “Or we could be snack time! Uh-uh. Nope. Not today. We’re leaving right now.”
Rainbow stood up, her wing covered in a bandage. “Wait! We can’t go now, the stuff we’re getting is epic! We’re gonna make history!” Suddenly, there was a rustling in the bushes. The four ponies whirled around and braced themselves. “He’ll want me first, I’m the sweetest!” Rainbow exclaimed.
Pinkie Pie turned the camera in her hair to Rainbow Dash. “Ya mean he’s gonna start with dessert?”
Rainbow thought about it for a second, and then turned to Pinkie. “Hmm. Good Point. Maybe not. A.J.’s toast though.” What came through the bushes surprised everyone.
“Ugh, my mane!”
“My book on Surviving The Wilderness For Dummies never covered on how to go through bushes with wings!”
“Twilight! Rarity!” Fluttershy exclaimed. Sure enough, the lavender Alicorn and the pure white unicorn stumbled out in front of them, both covered in leaves. Twilight looked tired and worn out, while Rarity looked livid.
Pinkie Pie quickly bounced over and gave the two a giant bear hug. “Boy, are we glad to see you two!”
Though she was glad to see her friends, Rainbow Dash was confused. “What are you guys doing here?”
After gently releasing herself from the crushing hug, Twilight looked at her incredulously, widening her purple colored eyes. “What are we doing here? We came out here looking for you guys! It was getting late, and nopony has heard from you since you guys left! We were worried!”
Rarity looked around at the group. “Why do you have all these cameras?” She sighed. “No matter. As long as you get my good side.” She flipped her mane. “Now then,” She gave Pinkie an irritated glare. “This had better be good, Pinkie Pie. I just had these hooves polished, that, and the fact that none of you are bleeding in a ditch somewhere, I am borderline furious!”
Pinkie raised an eyebrow at Rarity. “Okay, first of all Rarity, Applejack was in a ditch earlier… and second of all, she and I are here to discover rare Apples… then we ran into Rainbow and Fluttershy, and they were looking for Bigfoot, so they hired us to help them find him.” She concluded with a squee.
Rainbow Dash glanced at Pinkie. “Hired? No. You volunteered! We’re not paying you squat!”
Pinkie rolled her eyes. “Anyway, we were able to track him down. It was startled. It gave chase,” Pinkie stated dramatically. “We barely made it out with our lives, but we did discover a hole filled…filled with… non-living ponies, which he will presumably be eating later, along with Rainbow for desert.”
“What?”
“And we got the whole thing on camera.”
“That is 0% funny, Pinkie.” Rainbow grumbled.
Twilight sighed. “First of all, are you guys okay?” Pinkie Pie spoke up again.
“Yeah, sure, although Applejack fell into a hole and injured her leg and a tree branch fell on Dashie and injured her wing. Other than that, we’re good!” Twilight and Rarity looked at the two injured ponies with concern.
Applejack waved her uninjured hoof. “It’s alright, we’re fine. Just a few scratches, that’s all.”
Rainbow nodded. “Yeah, no problem. She waved her bandaged wing proudly. “Battle scar!”
Twilight sighed again, and shook her head. She turned to Fluttershy. “You say you got all this on camera?” The yellow Pegasus nodded. “Yes we did.”
Pinkie pointed her camera down the hole. The bodies that were there before were gone. She looked up. “No way! C’mon, Rarity, you saw the footage!”
Applejack frowned deeply. “Impossible.”
Rarity rolled her eyes. “I know”, She said in a sarcastic voice. “It’s shocking really. But no pony bodies could only mean one thing…It’s the zombie apocalypse!”
Applejack shook her head. “But that can’t be. They were… cold, an’… ashy, an’…pale, an’….dead!”
Rarity walked over to Applejack. “Darling, you know I trust you because you’re always so honest, so I think it is painfully clear what is going on here.” She gestured her hoof over to Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash with an angry look on her face. “These two have obviously orchestrated a prank, and somehow got you and Fluttershy to fall for it! A prank gone too far!”
Rainbow straightened up. “That’s not true!” She said defensively.
Pinkie Pie bounced over to Twilight.“Yeah! We would never pull a prank like this! Besides, that kind of a prank would be impossible to pull off!”
Rarity sighed for the tenth time and turned to Applejack and Fluttershy. “Think about it girls. Use your brains! They probably got two other pranksters to crawl into a hole and play dead. You got punked.” She turned to the Pegasus and Earth Pony. “But now they have gone too far because we are losing daylight, and time is of the essence!”
Fluttershy peeked out behind the camera she was holding. “Um, excuse me, but, how come we’re ruling out the theory that Bigfoot moved the ponies because we found it?”
“Fluttershy’s right,” Applejack said. “Plus, I found it by accident. I had to tumble all the way down a ridge to find it.”
Twilight thought about it and turned to Rarity. “Applejack has a point,” She said slowly. “I mean, the hole was covered. I don’t think those bodies were made to be found.”
Rarity widened her sapphire blue eyes at the princess. “Twilight,” She whined. “Not you too! I simply forbid you to buy into this! I say we grab our friends and drag them back to Ponyville!”
Applejack looked around. “Speaking of Ponyville, where’s Spike?”
Twilight gestured behind her. “He’s at home, watching over the castle.”
Suddenly, Pinkie’s body started to shake violently. “Oooooooohhhhhhh…..” She shuddered. Then she stopped. Everyone looked at her anxiously.
“What is it, Pinkie?” Applejack asked.
“It’s my Pinkie sense!” She exclaimed. “And it’s telling me that the bodies did not get up and walk away on their own, which also puts the kibosh on Rarity’s zombie theory.” Rarity looked unamused. Pinkie continued. “In fact… They were dragged! ”
Rainbow Dash grinned. “Ha! Told ya!”
The Main Six trudged through the forest. Rainbow frowned at the device that Pinkie pie found earlier. “Well, this can’t be right.” She turned to Pinkie and looked into the camera she was holding. “According to the tracking device, Bigfoot is…one of us.”
Rarity rolled her eyes. “Rainbow, stop saying Bigfoot like he’s real.”
Pinkie Pie couldn't take it anymore. “Applejack ate a giant chicken leg with a transmitter in it!” she blurted out. Applejack shot Pinkie a death glare.
“Oh, come on!” Rainbow groaned. “It wasn't weird to you that it was just sitting in a freaking tree?”
Applejack quickly tried to defend herself. “Aw, shoot, I said I was starved! It didn't help that you put applesauce in it!”
The group found a large river behind some trees. Rarity trotted ahead, and stood next to the river. She turned around. “Somepony would have us believe,” She said loudly to be heard over the water, “That these ‘bodies’ went into the drink. This means we have to search this creek… go back to Ponyville, call in the PVPD, and bring them all the way back here." She narrowed her eyes. “Now, Rainbow dash, Pinkie Pie, you know you’re both very dear friends of mine… but you had better think long and hard about what you say next. Playtime is over, and I will not be toyed with!”
SNAP!
A Bear Trap Snaps around Rarity’s back leg. Rarity screams in pain. “Ahhhh!” She starts hopping around, trying to get it off. The other ponies could barely register what just happened. But before they could rush over to help, Rarity fell backwards, and tumbled into the river with a big SPLASH!
“Oh my goodness!” Twilight cried, running down the path of the river, with the rest of the ponies following her. “Don’t fight the current!” She shouted. “Try to grab onto something, I’m coming!” Suddenly, Applejack squealed and ran the other direction into the bushes.
“A.J.! Where are you going?” Pinkie shouted. Applejack tore through the bushes.
“Don’t worry about it, Pinkie, y’all do ya’ll!” She called back frantically.
“Look!” Rainbow Dash pointed to where Rarity was being taken by the current. “There she is, we gotta go down there, come on!” Rarity was wailing and thrashing in the water. “And that’s what you get for blaming us for pranking!” Rainbow shouted. She looked over her shoulder at Pinkie and grinned. “This is a total bonus!”
Meanwhile, Fluttershy is filming Twilight knocking down a very thin tree with her magic.
“Twilight! Is there anything I can do to help?”
“Stay back, Fluttershy!”
“I was hoping you’d say that.”
The tree fell into the water just as Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie caught up to them. Rarity was floating towards the tree in a very fast pace. “Rarity, grab the branch! It’s right in front of you!” Rarity reached out and grabbed the tree branch, and held onto it for dear life.
“I got it! I got it!” She shouted. Twilight started hopping up and down.
“Yes!” She exclaimed. “Good work!” Fluttershy gave her signature “Yay.” Pinkie and Rainbow looked on in awe.
“Twilight, you’re amazing!” Pinkie squealed. “Hang on, Rarity! We’ll have you out of there in no time!” Suddenly a huge hawk swooped in out of nowhere, and snatched Pinkie’s camera out of her mane. Rainbow’s jaw dropped. “Hey!” Pinkie shouted. “That lady hawk stole my camera!”
“How do you know it’s a female?” Rainbow said her eyes still on the hawk.
“Ooh, she’s circling around!” Pinkie said.
“I think my leg just came off!” Rarity wailed. “Rarity! She’s coming back this way”, Pinkie called out. “I think she’s gonna drop it!” Sure enough, the hawk gave a squawk and dropped the camera. It started to fall down to where Rarity was still holding on to the tree branch. Pinkie Pie started to hop up and down. “Rarity, you have to catch it! Catch it!” Forgetting that she had magic, Rarity reached out one of her fore hooves and caught the camera just before it fell into the water.
Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash stared once again in awe at Rarity as Applejack appeared behind the two ponies, trying and failing to look as collected as possible. “Wow”, Rainbow said, impressed. "That was the most awesomest thing I've ever seen. Or at least top eight.”
STATIC
It was dawn. The remaining ponies were gathered around the camera Rarity had left behind. They watched the previous footage from the night before, and looked on with complete disbelief and awe as their friend is carried away by the hairy creature. Twilight shook her head and began to pace. “That is not possible.” She muttered.
“I… I can’t believe it,” Fluttershy said with fear in her voice. “Bigfoot took Rarity! What… what do we do?!”
Pinkie Pie looked around at the group with a somber expression. “I think there’s only one thing to do,” She said gravely. She bowed her head and closed her eyes. Everyone except for Twilight reluctantly did the same. “Rarity was a great fashionista… and a fantastic friend,” Pinkie said. “She was always there for us when we needed her. I’ll never forget the time when she chased me around with a pair of sewing scissors when I accidentally dropped Ice Cream on her new dress.” The rest of the ponies nodded and chuckled lightly. “Or the time when she followed through with that dare, and got her mane wet in the rain. She was so brave.”
Applejack looked up at Pinkie with a raise eyebrow. “How’d you know about that? You weren't even there.” Pinkie never opened her eyes.
“That’s not important right now, Applejack.”
Twilight spun around. “Alright, everypony stop! Rarity is not dead.”
Rainbow nodded. “Twilight’s right. She can’t be, and we won’t let her.” The Princess of Friendship gave a small smile.
“Thank You, Rainbow Dash.” She turned to address the rest of the group. “We are going to find her, and then we are going to get out of here.” Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy both picked up their cameras (Pinkie with her mane of course) and started rolling.
Rainbow looked back over her shoulder. “Fluttershy, how are we doing on battery?” She asked.
“Um, half, and we still have auxiliary.” The veterinarian replied.
Rainbow smiled. “Nice.” She turned to Twilight. “We’re ready when you are.” The Alicorn gave an exasperated sigh.
Pinkie bounced over to her. “Twilight, I know you’re upset,” She started. Twilight cut her off. “Why are you filming this, Pinkie?”
The Baker took a deep breath.
“Becauseatfirstwehadtofilmeverythingelseandthetapealonemightgiveuscluesandeveryponywouln’tbelieveusiswetoldthemandwecouldlookbackatthisandlaughandwehaveadutytoserveourcounrty!!!”
Twilight shook her head. “I give up. I have no idea what you just said.”
Applejack suddenly galloped in front of them and stopped. She turned to look back at the group. “Guys, I smell barbecue!”
Twilight looked at her friend with sympathy. “No, Applejack, you’re not. You’re distressed and you’re probably projecting a delusion of grandeur.”
Applejack shook her head. “No...No. It’s smoked meat.” She took a big sniff. “And it’s fresh. It’s freshly smoked meat!” She took off, galloping in the direction of the smell.
Twilight blinked in surprise. “That’s the direction where Rarity was taken!” She quickly galloped after Applejack. “Let’s go! Everypony, now!”
Rainbow Dash leisurely trotted behind Twilight. “Sure knows a lot about smoked meat,” She commented.
The Main five silently moved through the forest with Twilight in the front. Fluttershy hovered in the air in front of Rainbow Dash while filming her.
“Three, two…”
“Rainbow Dash here! We are currently tracking the monster in an attempt to find and rescue one of our own… or possibly find her remains.”
“That is overstated! ” Twilight called back.
“Fix in post,” Rainbow said quickly. “Needless to say, we have risked everything in order to bring the truth behind this legend to the rest of the free speaking world.”
Applejack stopped. “Are she blows,” she announced proudly. There was a crackling fire and a cave within just a hundred feet from where the ponies were standing. “I knew that I could always smell food from a mile away.”
Fluttershy pointed a hoof towards the cave. “Look. That’s the same cave we can see from the blind, which means… we’ve gone in a big circle.”
Twilight slowly crawled out in front. “Okay everypony,” She whispered. “Stay together. Let’s go.” Everyone quickly and quietly made their way towards the fire. When they got there, they saw that a hunk of meat was being rotisseried over the fire. There was also a certain saddle sack with gems on it hanging in the entrance of the cave.
“Uh-oh.” Pinkie said.
“Oh my goodness,” Fluttershy breathed. “That’s Rarity’s saddle sack!”
Rainbow Dash gulped. “It looked she got roasted rotisserie style.”
Pinkie took a deep breath. “Okay…uh… In lieu of everything that we’ve been through with that dear pony… I can’t believe I’m about to say this…” Everyone stared at Pinkie intently. “…Rarity does smell absolutely delicious, anypony?” Applejack took another deep sniff.
“Amen,” She agreed. “If that is in fact Rarity…which I highly doubt…I reckon that she’s been dry rubbed.”
Twilight threw her hooves up in the air. “What’s the matter with you guys?! Look, I refuse to believe that there isn't a rational explanation for all this, and I highly doubt that Bigfoot is dry rubbing his dinner with barbecue sauce!” Applejack spoke up.
“’Course he didn't, Sugar cube. It’s apples and oranges. The operative word is ‘Dry’ meaning ‘No sauce’.”
Rainbow Dash cut in. “Look, the show must go on, right? We gotta get inside that cave.”
Pinkie came back from investigating the cave. “He’s not in there,” she reported. “But I found a cabin not too far away. Also, I think he might have a green thumb… which is weird, because he’s Bigfoot.” It was true. Beautiful flowers were decorated along the path. The ponies quietly made their way to a large clearing that surrounded the cabin. “Huh.” Pinkie said. “This is surprisingly cozy… and is that a solar panel? ”
Twilight burst through the door with the others right behind her. The inside of the cabin looked rather charming. There was furniture, a fireplace…and Rarity wrapped in a blanket in a chair with her eyes closed. “Rarity!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed. Everyone rushed to the unicorn’s side.
“She’s here!” Pinkie squealed. “She’s alive!”
Twilight gently shook the unicorn by her shoulders. “Rarity? Rarity, say something! Talk to me. Tell us you’re okay.” Rarity’s eyes remained closed. Pinkie started to tear up. Were they too late?
Suddenly, Fluttershy shouted “THERE’S A SALE HAPPENING AT THE MALL!” Rarity immediately perked up. She looked around at everyone in surprise.
“Oh, hi girls!” She said with a big smile. Everyone sighed in relief, and hugged the element of Generosity.
“Rarity,” Twilight breathed. “Oh gosh, we thought that…” She paused, and composed herself. “They thought ...” Rarity gave a light chuckle. “No, I’m fine, Twilight dear. In fact, we were going come and find you right after brunch.”
Applejack raised an eyebrow. “We?” Just then, the door flew open, and the large hairy creature stood in the doorway. Everyone but Rarity screamed, including the creature. Twilight’s horn lit up, ready to fire at the creature if he came any closer.
“Don’t shoot!” The creature pleaded. “I’m unarmed!” The ponies’ mouths hung open.
“Dear Lord,” Rainbow gasped, stumbling forward. “You can speak!”
Rarity waved her hoof in the air. “He’s okay girls!” The creature pulled off his head… it was costume. The monster was in fact… just a pony. An Earth Pony. A stallion. He was tall, about seven feet to be exact, and he had light gray fur, and a scruffy beard. He looked around at the astonished mares sheepishly.
“Okay, I may have fibbed a little bit right out the gate there,” He said in a deep voice. “I’m armed but I’m not dangerous.”
“You look dangerous.” Applejack said truthfully.
The stallion shrugged. “I mean, I‘m really dangerous, I’m just not vengeful or vindictive.” Rarity smiled warmly at the stallion.
“It’s quite alright, Ed. They’re with me.” The others just stood still, unsure of what to think of the situation.
“Rarity, what is going on here?” Twilight asked cautiously.
“Ladies,” Rarity said, extending her hoof towards the large pony. “This is Big Ed Trottington. He saved my life.” The girls looked at Ed and back at Rarity. “Truth is, my ankle was a lot worse off than I admitted,” Rarity confessed. Ed put the head of his costume on a shelf, and the others started to relax. “I bled profusely and at some point in the night, I passed out… by the way, Applejack, your hat is on that chair over there.” As Applejack went to retrieve her hat, Ed explained what happened the night before.
“I found the trap with blood on it, and saw Miss Rarity, put two and two together and felt horrible. It was my trap.”
Rarity stood up and started hobbling around, lightly tossing her recently brushed mane. She was all cleaned up. “Like a gentleman, Big Ed picked me up and brought me back here. He cleaned up my ankle and re dressed my wound.”
“Um, Mr. Ed?” Fluttershy spoke up softly. “Pardon me for asking, but why do you wear a furry costume?”
“And what are you doing out here?” Rainbow asked, knitting her eyebrows.
“I've been living in these woods for over a decade,” Ed explained. “The sad truth is I just lost faith in the Equestrian society. I was an army ranger back in the day, so I knew I could exist at one with nature.” He gave a deep sigh. “I don’t have to open the paper every morning and get depressed.”
Pinkie walked up next to Ed. “You lost faith in society? Why don’t you come over to Ponyville? It’s ideal, and fun, and there are lots of ponies, and they’re all so nice, and we sing a lot…” Big Ed smiled down at the bubbly mare.
“I don’t think so,” he said. “Thanks for the offer, but I’m content with being alone. Regarding the costume, In any event, I created this pelt suit for camouflage. It allows me to hunt and move about without disturbing the natural order of things. Plus, I burn easily.”
Twilight, having relaxed now that everything seemed to be okay, smiled at the tall stallion. “Well, we can’t thank you enough for saving our friend.” Then her demeanor changed a little. “And I really hate to be a buzz kill here, but there are still two bodies that are unaccounted for. I suppose you wouldn't know anything about that, would you, Mr.Trottington?”
Ed smiled. “Oh no, your highness. I wouldn't hurt a fly.”
There was an awkward silence that followed.
“Anypony hungry?” he asked. Voices erupted in agreement.
“Oh, yeah.”
“Yes.”
Trottington nodded. I've been smoking some venison outside all morning,” he said. “Trust me. My dry rub is the best thing you’ll ever taste.”
“Affirmative.” Applejack said with a laugh. Then she paused. “Uh, so it smells,” She said quickly.
Pinkie Pie turned to Applejack with an angry glare. “Oh my… Applejack, you are unbelievable!”
Applejack glanced at Pinkie, looking guilty already. “What?”
“Don’t you ‘what’ me!” Pinkie hissed. “You sampled the meat, didn't you? You tasted the meat when we all thought it was Rarity!”
Applejack gave a huff. “No. I said that I highly doubted that it was Rarity. Besides, what difference does it make? You’re the one who said that she smelt delicious!”
Pinkie’s eyes widened. “I was trying to put a positive spin on a horrific event! I certainly wasn't going to partake! ”
“I can feel my ribs, Pinkie.”
“It hasn't even been 24 hours!”
Ed quickly cut in. “Okay, okay. There’s plenty of meat for everypony… and none of it is made out of pony. I’m gonna hoof it up to the Ranger station and get an ATV back in here for Miss Rarity… and for the Earth pony and Pegasus,” He informed. “I just need to get out of this suit.”
The Main six sat at the dinner table eating the meat that Ed put out for them (Except for Fluttershy, who insisted on salad and fruit and kept filming the group while she ate).
After a while, Rainbow Dash notices that someone was missing. “Where’s Pinkie Pie?” she asked.
“Probably in the back snooping around,” Applejack said a matter-a-factly. She leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms. “You guys aren’t at all suspicious of Ed?”
Rarity picked up a grape with her magic and smirked. “You didn’t seem to have any trouble eating his food.” After munching on the delicious fruit, her expression changed. “Pinkie Pie, you better not be snooping back there!” She yelled.
***
In the back of the house, the Element of Laughter was indeed snooping around in Ed’s bedroom with her camera still being held by her mane. “Pretty bare bones, huh, Ed?” She said with a sigh. She eyed a brown wooden box under the bed. “What do we have here?” She reached down and pulled the box out from under the bed.
***
“I’m just saying,” Applejack said back at the dinner table. “This fella’s been living here for how long? And he’s never seen or heard anything?”
Rarity straightened up in her chair and threw Applejack a stern glare. “Ed Trottington is an angel in a wolf’s, bear’s and elk’s clothing,” She said, waving a fork with her magic. “Why would he nurse me back to health if he was a cold blooded killer, Applejack? It doesn’t make sense! Despite his rugged appearance, the Stallion is quite chivalrous.”
Rainbow Dash leaned back in her chair, putting her hooves behind her head. “He’s two Stallions,” She said with a smirk. “Seven feet, and what, like, 400 pounds? Did ya get a load of those meat hooks? Can you imagine? ”
Twilight looked at Rainbow with a deadpan expression. “Imagine what ?”
***
Meanwhile, Pinkie had laid out most of the contents of what was inside the box on the mattress. Documents, files, certificates, The Purple heart, and a picture of Ed in a military uniform and another picture of Ed in a tux with a pretty mare beside him in a white dress. Silently pondering these items, she moved on to the shelf by the bed, and found another box. As she opened the box, her eyes widened.
“Hey guys, I think you should get in here!” In less than two seconds, the other ponies appeared at the doorway.
“Pony feathers, Pinkie Pie!” Rarity said angrily. “I told you not to—“ She stopped short as Pinkie held up photos of the two dead ponies that were lying in the hole.
“I found these in a box by Ed’s bed.” Pinkie said. Rarity quickly held up the photos with her magic so that everyone could see them better.
“I thought I recognized those ponies,” Twilight gasped. “That one’s June Del-Mane!”
Rarity squinted her eyes. “And that one is Silver Platinum. I remember reading about them in the Newspaper. They went missing about two weeks ago, but the trail went cold.”
Fluttershy nodded. “That’s right! They’re associated with a Serbian crime syndicate up north.”
Twilight looked back at the pictures gravely. “It looks like these guys have taken contract killing to a whole new level.”
Applejack shook her head. “What did I tell you? Big Ed is probably taking out the trash for mobsters who don’t even speak English!”
Pinkie Pie tilted her head to the side. “We don’t know that for sure. I mean, they’re bound to have accents.”
Applejack face hoofed. “Regardless! We know who the dead people are, and we know who killed them and we’re in his house! We need to get out of here.”
As the Main six piled into the living room, Ed burst through the front door with a huge BAM!! They all stopped in their tracks, some shouting in surprise. Without hesitation, Rarity held out the photos in front of her with her magic.
“Would you care to explain these?” She asked in a calm voice.
“I found those netting salmon.” Ed replied with difficulty.
Rarity swallowed, and said “I’m afraid we have to leave now, Ed.”
Ed said nothing at first, but then he replied, “I’m afraid you’re not gonna make it out of here alive, Miss Rarity.”
The Main Six stood their ground, ready for anything that Ed might throw at them(Except maybe for Pinkie and Fluttershy who were still filming, at least until Ed made a move). Twilight and Rarity both lit up their horns, ready to fire. Then, Ed collapsed on the floor in front of them with an axe buried in his back. The mares stared at him in shock. Pinkie Blinked. “Um…Ed?”
STATIC
“I have a pulse,” Twilight Sparkle announced. She was kneeling next to Ed on the floor who still had an axe lodged in his back. The Princess looked back up at her friends, her face the picture of anxiousness. “He’s still alive, but I don’t think he’s going to make it.”
Rarity scowled and closed the front door with force. “Blast it,” She hissed.
Rainbow Dash spoke up. “So, does this mean that Big Ed isn’t a killer?” She asked incredulously.
“Probably, Rainbow,” Pinkie said sarcastically. “But maybe you should ask him yourself.”
Rarity spun around. “Enough!” she cried. “It must have been those Serbian Ponies.”
Applejack ran around the cabin, looking out of every window, checking to see if anyone was out there. “How do we know that Ed wasn’t already workin’ for ‘em?” She asked.
Rarity’s voice rose up in anger. “Because he saved my life, and he served our country..” She started talking faster and faster. “..and he lost his wife, and he’s got a garden , Applejack!”
Twilight stood up. “Why would the Serbian ponies be out there?” She asked, confused. “How would they have known that Applejack was going to uncover those bodies?”
Applejack nodded. “Right! I didn't do in on purpose!”
“Wait,” Pinkie said, and turned to Rainbow Dash. “We got here by canoe. How did you guys get here?” The party pony asked.
Rainbow Dash looked at Fluttershy and looked back at the rest of the group. “We asked around,” She said. Everyone else face-hoofed.
“That’s why,” Twilight groaned. “The Serbian ponies are bound to keep tabs on the area…you practically advertised that you were out here!” The two Pegasi blushed.
Rainbow Dash chuckled nervously. “Heh, heh…Oops…”
Rarity frowned. “Which means they knew their dumping ground’s been compromised, so they sent out some muscle to tie up loose ends and move the bodies!”
Applejack turned to Rarity, both of her eyebrows raised. “Including me?”
Pinkie’s expression flattened. “No, Applejack, you’re probably okay. Of course including you! Everypony!” She threw her hooves up in the air. “All of us, and poor Big Ed. He probably made it all the way back here to warn us! That brave, huge and cuddly teddy bear!”
Twilight raised a hoof. “Or they let him go so they can track him and see where he goes.” Everybody’s face paled at that theory.
“So some cold blooded Serbian ponies are coming to kill us?” Applejack croaked.
Rainbow swallowed hard. “Uh… has the Young Pony Film Competition Award ever been won posthumously?” She asked nervously.
Pinkie’s eyes widened. “We need to get out of here!”
Twilight frantically rushed over to her friends. “Wait, no! It’s too dangerous, that’s like leading lambs to slaughter!”
Rainbow Dash suddenly straightened up, with nothing but pure determination on her face. “Twilight’s right,” She said bravely. “They want a fight, we’ll give ‘em a fight.”
Rarity tossed her mane. “I’m really more of a lover,” She said simply.
“We know!” The other ponies shouted in unison. Rarity frowned.
“…So… what are we going to do?” Fluttershy asked. Twilight’s eyes scanned the cabin.
“Well,” she said with a sigh. “Look around this place.” There we lots of furniture, chairs, etc. Twilight held up a knife and a screwdriver with her magic and grinned. “Let’s get ready.”
“You do realize we’re in grave danger, right, Fluttershy?” Twilight asked. She and Fluttershy were walking across the clearing outside of the cabin. The yellow Pegasus was filming Twilight from behind. “Ponies need to know,” She replied.
Twilight rolled her eyes and shook her head. “What does that even mean? ”
Fluttershy shrugged. “I have no idea,” she admitted. “It’s just the default excuse ponies give in documentaries for why they keep shooting no matter what happens. Also, I promised Rainbow Dash.”
Back at the cabin, the rest of the Main Six were using every bit of furniture they could find, and barricaded it against the front door. Big Ed had woken up, and watched the display from the floor. “Be careful with that vase,” He said with a groan, as he watched Pinkie pile a glass vase precariously on top of the pile. “That was one of my buddies’ during the army days.” Pinkie nodded and put another vase on the edge of that one. it looked like it was going to fall, but it stayed, like it was defying the laws of physics.
“Just try to relax Ed,” Pinkie said cheerfully. Ed looked at the two vases in awe. “How did you do that?” Rarity broke the glass in the window next to the front door and sat in a chair in front of it.
When all was secured, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, and Applejack met up outside in front of the cabin. Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy were still filming. Twilight came out from the forest and joined them. She had been setting up equipment around the area. “All right,” she said with a sigh. “I think we’ve done all we can do for the night. With any luck, sundown will come without incident, and we can head out of here at first light. I’ll be keeping watch here. You guys, stay in the back with Rarity and take your cues from her.” The others looked at each other in worry. “We are light on magic,” Twilight continued. “But we still have it, and Ed’s got weapons in the back, and God knows what he used to do with them.” She looked around at each of her friends’ faces somberly. “I’m sorry it’s come to this. But we will make it out of here if we work together.”
Fluttershy nodded. “You’re right, Twilight,” she said. “And we’re sorry it had to come to this too.” Rainbow Dash glanced at her friend with her eyebrows raised. “We are?”
BAM!
A blast of green magic hit Fluttershy in the shoulder. With a gasp of pain, she fell to the ground.
“FLUTTERSHY!!!” The ponies cried. Twilight immediately stood protectively in front of the fallen pony, her horn fired up.
“Take cover!” She yelled.”Go! Now!” a second later, another blast came from a different direction, and hit Rainbow Dash. She too, fell to the ground with a painful thud.
“RAINBOW DASH!”
All at once, multiple blasts kept coming at the ponies. Twilight fired a few blasts of magic of her own, and turned to Pinkie Pie and Applejack. “You guys have to go inside the cabin! Now!” She yelled.
Pinkie gasped. “No way, Twilight!”
Applejack shook her head vigorously. “There’s no way we’re leaving you out here!” She shouted.
After shooting another round of blasts, Twilight turned back to her friends with a hard look on her face. “Yes. You. ARE! ” With that, she teleported the two earth ponies into the cabin with Rarity.
“Twilight!” They shouted.
There was no way of getting out now. Twilight was about to teleport her two injured friends when a blast hit her horn. Twilight stumbled backwards, and shook her head to get rid of the dizziness. She saw pony figures behind the trees. With a snarl, she lit her horn once more.
A blast of magic shot through one of the windows of the cabin. Someone was shouting in a foreign language. “It’s the Serbs!” Applejack shouted. Outside, a Serbian pony shouted in pain. Twilight had shot an arrow at his leg with a crossbow. She dropped it on the ground, and continued to fire with her magic.
“Wowie, wowie kazowie!” Pinkie exclaimed. She was still holding her camera with her mane. Both mares were peeking out of the window. Another pony from outside was shouting in Serbian. Pinkie turned her head to Applejack who was crouching beside her.”What do you think that means?” She asked.
Applejack glared at her friend. “It means we need to get out of here, Pinkie!” She and Pinkie dove over a table and made their way to the living room. From outside, they could hear Rainbow Dash’s voice.
“Where did Everypony go?”
Pinkie bounced into the living room. “Rarity!” she chimed. “Twilight knows how to shoot a crossbow! ” Rarity still sat at the window, shooting out magic of her own to cover Twilight. There was more shouting outside.
Big Ed turned his head to the two Earth ponies. “I’m Serbian,” He grunted. “He said for you to surrender.”
“Everypony get down!” Rarity shouted. Blasts of magic where raining down on the cabin. Pinkie and Applejack were on the floor screaming.
Meanwhile, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy were still lying side by side on the ground because of their injuries. Fluttershy was somehow still holding up the camera. This is the craziest thing I've ever done, she thought. Rainbow Dash was reeling about what was currently going on. They were right in the middle of the cross fires, blasts of magic just barely missing them. “Holy Cow,” Rainbow exclaimed. A Serbian pony came out of the blue in front of the two Pegasi. He slowly walked towards them with his horn lit up.
Fluttershy gulped. “Uh… R-Rainbow Dash?”
Back inside the cabin, the three girls saw the pony advancing on their friends. Ed was unconscious. “Shoot him, Rarity!” Applejack shouted. Rarity didn’t take her eyes of the Serbian pony. “Sit down, and shut up! ” She hissed. “Come on, you ruffian…”
Back outside, the Serbian pony was coming closer and closer to the injured Pegasi, with his horn lit up, and ready to fire. Rainbow gulped. “Um… help? Somepony? Help! Somepony?”
“Rainbow!” Fluttershy wept.
“Hello? Somepony Help us!” Rainbow Shouted.
BAM!! BAM!! BAM!!
Three blasts of blue magic knocked the Serbian pony to the ground. The Pegasi sighed in relief. “Uh, thank you! Thanks!” Rainbow called. “ ‘Kay, where’s the other one?...”
At the cabin Rarity smiled victoriously. Pinkie Pie was filming her. “Rarity, you got him! You totally shot that dude!” Pinkie said excitedly with a grin. Rarity turned her head toward the pink mare.
“Of course I did,” She said with a huff. “Now, why don’t you grab a weapon and HELP ME??! ” Pinkie blinked and chuckled sheepishly.
“Oh, right.. yeah.. sorry.” She went to the back room. “Sweet, another crossbow!” She grabbed it, went to a window, and aimed it at a Serbian pony who was heading for the cabin. Then suddenly, it snapped. She looked over her shoulder at Rarity. “Um… Rarity… mine broke. A little help?” Rarity’s eyes widened. With a groan, she shot the Serbian pony before he could get to the baker. “Thanks, Raribear!” Pinkie called happily.
Rarity narrowed her eyes. “Never call me that again.” She turned back to look outside the window frame. “Where’s Twilight? I can’t see anything to the West.” Pinkie turned around to see Applejack behind her, eating oatmeal.
Applejack looked up. “This could be my last meal, Pinkie.”
They heard a thud from outside, followed by Twilight’s voice. “Rarity! Cover me!”
BAM!! BAM!!
Outside, Twilight rushed over to the two Pegasi, and looked over their injuries. “Rainbow Dash! Fluttershy! I need you guys to apply pressure to each other’s wounds, can you do that? Fluttershy, how are you holding up?”
Fluttershy blushed. “I-I had an accident,” She trembled.
“UGH!” Rainbow Dash groaned.
BAM!
Blue magic no longer came out of the cabin. The back door was blasted open. “Girls!” Twilight cried.
“He shot Rarity!” Pinkie cried. The Unicorn was slumped against the window. She hadn’t moved since she got shot. A Serbian pony walked towards them menacingly. He lunged for them. Applejack quickly got up, and bucked him in the face. The pony stumbled back, then without warning, he grabbed a frying pan and hit the farm pony in the head with it. Applejack fell down next to Pinkie Pie, her head spinning. Pinkie threw her arms around her friend, forgetting she still had her camera in her mane. The Serbian pony scowled as he walked towards them again, his horn lit up.
“This goin’ be so hard on m’ son,” Applejack slurred in Pinkie’s arms.
“You don’t have a son.” Pinkie said gently.
Applejack looked up at Pinkie. “You know what I meeeeaaaan…” She said dizzily. Just as the pony began to fire, someone else was speaking Serbian behind him, and hit him in the head, causing the pony to fall to the floor. It was Big Ed. He stood over the pony with the axe still in his back.
Pinkie’s jaw dropped. “Ed? You’re alive!”
Applejack gave him a warbled smile. “Thanks you kiiindlyy.”
Big Ed nodded. “No problem,” He said, and then he started to sway. “I feel…woozy…” He fell to the floor in front of them.
Suddenly, Twilight burst through the door, her horn lit up.
“Hey, Twi!” Pinkie chirped.
“What happened?” Twilight gasped, as she ran across the living room towards Rarity.
“That meanie Pony shot Rarity!” Pinkie said.
Twilight knelt next to Rarity who was still slumped against the window frame. “Rarity?” She gently shook the Unicorn, hoping to wake her. “Rarity, oh, come on Rarity, talk to me. Are you okay?”
Rarity groaned and opened her eyes. “This really hasn’t been my day, Twilight.”
STATIC
The Pony Police and Paramedics had arrived at the scene. The Serbian ponies were being arrested and were being read their rights. Rarity, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy were being checked over. Twilight was conversing with the head ranger. Applejack (Who had recovered from the frying pan to the head) and Pinkie Pie (Who was still filming) stayed behind on the cabin porch.
“It’s a darn shame,” Applejack said frowning. At their hooves, Big Ed was lying on the porch floor with yellow plastic covering his body.
“Here lies Big Ed Trottington,” Pinkie said with a sad sigh. “He was a gentle giant with a sensitive soul… and an impressive armament of medieval weaponry. If it wasn't for him, Applejack would be dead.”
“So would you, Pinkie.”
“Now, that remains open for debate.”
“There is no debate. Bang, bang. I’m dead, you’re dead.”
“I woulda thrown the camera at his face, Applejack.”
Applejack clicked her tongue in disbelief. “Oh, please. There’s no way you would've thrown—“
“AAH!!”
Big Ed’s hoof moved and both mares screamed. Out of instinct, Applejack stomped on it. There was a groan from under the yellow plastic. The two Earth ponies looked at each other, and then Applejack quickly crouched down and pulled off the yellow plastic. Big Ed was alive! “Doesn't anypony check for a pulse anymore?” He grunted.
“Jumpin June bugs!” Applejack exclaimed. “You’re still alive! “I’m… I’m sorry, I didn't know, Ed. Hold on.” Applejack raised her head and shouted, “I need an EMT over here right now! Ed Trottington is alive!” She lowered her head back to Ed’s level. “Hang in there, Ed. We’re gonna get you to the hospital STAT!”
Pinkie couldn't believe what she was filming. She grinned like crazy while Applejack looked back at her, completely bewildered. Ed spoke up.“Um, I kinda turned my back on modern medicine 10 years ago,” He said with a groan. “I…I’m fine. Can you just pull the axe out of my spine, please?”
Applejack grimaced. “Um…I think you might wanna make an exception for this one, partner. You don’t wanna get a staph infection.”
Big Ed pondered about this for a second. “Yeah, I suppose so.” He replied. “Oh… I’m getting woozy…” With another groan, he passed out once more.
Applejack lifted her head again. “Didn't Y’all hear me?” She shouted, running off to get help. “Ed Trottington is alive!”
(RD’s Voiceover.) It was over. The ordeal had come to an end.
(The next scene is happening in slow motion.) The paramedics and the police were just finishing up. One by one, Rarity, Rainbow dash, and Fluttershy were being lifted into stretchers. All of them smiled and waved at Pinkie when she passed by them with her camera.
So, the Bigfoot thing was a bust. Instead, we got stranded, injured, and we nearly drowned. And most of all, we uncovered secrets that almost took us the grave. But we stood up to the challenge.
Twilight passes Pinkie with a grin on her face, and gives a nod of respect.
We came. We saw. We conquered. And most importantly, we survived. Heck, we even made a new friend along the way.
Applejack walkes over to Pinkie with a smile as they both followed their friends to the ambulance.
We may not have gotten what we came for… but we gained so much more. There could be a lesson to be learned here… like always research about where you’re going… or always bring a map… or even that with friends, you could conquer anything! But the fact is… we didn’t learn anything… because we already knew that sappy stuff.
A Film By The Elements Of Harmony
Applause and cheers erupted the room as the credits rolled on the screen. The lights flicked back on. The Main Six had all gathered together at one of the rooms of the castle to watch the film they had put together. Also in the room where the CMC, Spike, Big Macintosh, Granny Smith, Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, and Princess Cadence, along with Shining Armor. Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy stood next to the T.V.
Rainbow smiled. “That’s pretty much it, guys, that’s our film.” Discord suddenly popped into the room and started clapping.
“Brilliant, ponies!” He praised. “I haven’t seen a film like that since Gone with the Winnie.”
Fluttershy smiled. “Thank you, Discord.”
Sweetie Belle munched on a piece of licorice. “I really liked it!” She squeaked. “The editing and the dissolve was a nice touch too.”
Granny Smith nodded and put her arm around Applejack. “Yes, well, you youngins are very lucky to be alive,” She said. “Those Serbian Ponies don’t mess around…especially when they’re wearing masks… and speakin’ Serbian.” Everyone nodded.
“Eeeyup.” Big Mac said.
“Well said, Granny!” Pinkie said cheerfully.
Applejack smiled and nodded. “We’re also happy to report that Big Ed will make a full recovery.” Once again, the room filled with applause.
Rarity smiled. “Bless his heart.” She sighed. “And if I may just add, that while I’m not particularly pleased with how I’m portrayed in this film, I must admit that it was well put together.”
Celestia nodded. “And if I may add,” She said in her regal tone of voice. “The girls’ heroics cannot be overstated.”
Everyone cheered for the Main Six as they grinned proudly and bashfully.
Luna nodded. “Yes… you have all done well, despite the circumstances at hand.” she said.
Shining Armor hugged his little sister. “I’m proud of you, Twily,” He said with a grin. Cadence joined the hug. “I’m proud of you too.” She said.
Spike laughed. “You guys were so funny!” Everyone in the room laughed along with him.
Apple bloom turned to her big sister. “That part with the hole had me in stitches!” She giggled. “And the part with the transmitter!”
Applejack shook her head and blushed. “Not my proudest moments, that’s for sure.”
Sweetie Belle shook her head. “No, Rarity was the funniest!” Spike grinned. “Not as funny as Apple Jacquelyn Smith!” he sneered.
Applejack frowned and turned to Pinkie Pie. “Pinkie, I told you to edit that out!”
Pinkie quickly shook her head. “I didn't leave it in. Fluttershy was in charge of the editing!”
Fluttershy smiled. “And I thought it was pretty.” Applejack groaned and covered her face.
Scootaloo gave Rainbow Dash a hug. “You were so brave!” She squealed. Rainbow smiled and hugged her back.
Applebloom spoke up again. “By the way, sis, did you and Pinkie Pie win the competition?” Applejack and Pinkie shook their heads.
“No,” Pinkie said. “We only found one apple.”
“We must have missed the rest when we were running and screaming through the forest.” Applejack chucked.
Scootaloo turned to Rainbow and Fluttershy. “What about you guys?” She asked. “Did you win?”
Rainbow and Fluttershy also shook their heads no. “No. Apparently, ours was too violent,” Rainbow said, rolling her eyes.
“And one judge said that it was all staged,” Fluttershy added. “So we didn’t win.”
Spike smiled. “At least yours got on T.V.” he pointed out. It was true. T.V. producers saw the footage, and they liked it so much, that it was being aired in all of Equestria at least two different times. It was coming on again later that night.
Rainbow smirked. “True,” she said proudly.
Twilight nodded. “And hopefully it will bring you comfort to know that the killers and the attempted killers will be prosecuted in the royal court.” She stated.
Cadence turned to the Main Six. “Well, it all worked out about as well as it could, considering that most of you had gotten injured.”
Applejack’s hoof was in a cast, and she had a bandage on her forehead. Rainbow dash had a cast for her wing, and Rarity also had a cast for her back hoof. Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Rarity all had bandages on where they had gotten shot. However, they were going to be okay. Applebloom hugged Applejack lovingly. “Nothin’ that my big sis can’t handle,” she stated proudly.
Sweetie Belle hugged Rarity tightly.
“Or mine!” She sang.
“Or mine!” Scootaloo chimed in.
“Well,” said Celestia. “We have to get going now. Royal duties call.” Everyone nodded and said their goodbyes. Discord bid them adieu, snapped his fingers, and disappeared. The CMC left to hang out with each other for awhile, and Granny Smith and Big Mac left for the farm. After Shining Armor and Cadence left, The Main Six and Spike decided to stay behind for a bit.
“I think we've had enough adventure for one week.” Applejack said with a chuckle.
Twilight smiled. “Yes… from now on, we’ll just stick to the part of the Ever free forest that we know. ” Everyone nodded.
Spike smirked. “Are you sure?” he asked evilly. “There’s always next year, you know! You could try again!”
“NO!”
The End
Fluttershy put the finishing touches on wrapping Rarity’s leg. “Alright. That’s the best we can do for now, Rarity.”
Rarity was wrapped in a blanket. Her mane was messy and wet, and her face was smeared with dirt. “I stepped in a bear trap.” She sulked. Fluttershy started to wipe Rarity’s face with a cloth. “This is so humiliating,” Rarity continued. “Of all the worst things that could happen, this is THE. WORST. POSSIBLE. THING! ” She suddenly noticed that Rainbow Dash was sitting next to her and she had been filming her the whole time. “Do you MIND ?!” She hissed. Rainbow quickly stood up, bringing the camera out of her face.
“Does anypony know where we are?” Applejack asked, trotting out from behind Rainbow. “Because I certainly don’t.”
The cyan Pegasus nodded. “Agreed. We can follow the river up a ways, but the tracks won’t be good once the sun goes down.”
Applejack turned to her fellow athlete. “Well, didn’t you guys bring a map?” Rainbow Dash handed her camera over to Fluttershy.
“Yeah, well uh, I sorta kicked it into the creek.”
“YOU DID WHAT ??!” Everyone except the Pegasi shouted.
Rainbow Dash burst out laughing. “Kidding!”
Fluttershy smiled sheepishly at the rest of the group. “We actually never had a map.” Everyone rolled their eyes.
“Well, we accidentally spilled water on our map.” Applejack sighed.
Twilight Sparkle looked around at her friends, and then turned to Rarity. “Do you think you can move on that leg?” She asked.
Rarity sighed. “Not very fast, I’m afraid.”
Rainbow dash began to shiver. “Man, we’re gonna freeze our flanks off!”
Twilight stood up. “Okay. This is what’s going to happen. We’re gonna set up camp for tonight. It’s too dark to try to fly out of here, and it’s best if we stay together. We’re going to back ourselves up to the water so that we don’t have to worry about a 360 degree perimeter. We will build a fire, and at first light, I will fly out of here, and I will come back with help.”
Pinkie Pie gave Twilight a worried look. “But Twilight, it’s not safe to go out all by yourself!”
Twilight turned to the pink mare. “Pinkie, everypony has to stay here. Half of us are injured, and Fluttershy is the only pony who is able to take care on everypony’s wounds. Plus, you have to stay here and help her. I’ll be twice as fast on my own.” Rarity shakily starts to stand up.
“Twilight’s right,” She grunted. Fluttershy and Applejack started over to help her, but Rarity Politely refused. “I’m fine, Darlings, I’m fine. It’s best if we set up a perimeter, and I shall take watch.”
Rainbow shook her head. “No, Rarity, you’re hurt. I’ll take watch.”
Applejack also shook her head no. ‘”You’re hurt too, Rainbow. I’ll take watch.”
Rarity held up a hoof. “No girls, I insist. Both of you are hurt, and you need rest. I won’t be able to sleep a wink tonight anyways, so it’s only fitting. Besides, I still have magic. I will take watch. Twilight will set the camp and protect the herd. I shall alert you if anything goes wrong.”
Applejack slowly nodded. “Alright.” She said hesitantly.
Rainbow took Pinkie’s camera out of her mane. “Well…at least take one of the cameras with you,” She said, handing the camera to Rarity. “It would mean so much to us if you see anything… just point and shoot.”
Rarity frowned at Rainbow Dash. “What do I look like to you?” Rainbow paused, and smiled.
“A marshmallow!”
Rarity rolled her eyes. Applejack walked up to her. “Here”, she said, taking off her Stetson and putting on top of Rarity’s head. “It’s gonna be cold tonight.”
Rarity adjusted the hat. “This actually feels rather delightful. Where did you get it?”
The Farm Pony grinned. “Got it from my Pa,” She said proudly. “He won it from an apple bobbing contest.”
Twilight, Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Pinkie pie sat around a campfire. It was already nighttime. Fluttershy kept the camera rolling as their ordeal continued. “This fire is really impressive, Applejack”, Pinkie complimented. “I had no idea you could make fire with sticks! My parents would always scrape rock together to make a fire!”
Applejack smiled. “Well, I don’t quite know how your parents did that Pinkie, but rubbing two sticks together to start a fire has been around for years.”
Fluttershy sighed contentedly. “I love the outdoors.”
Rainbow Dash glances at their tracking device and frowns. “Uh, nothing’s beeping on the Bigfoot tracker.” Pinkie was confused at first.
“Huh?”
Then the realization dawned on her, and she looked at Applejack with wide eyes. “Ew, Applejack. That’s what you ran off to do?” Applejack blushed a deep red and covered her face with her hooves in embarrassment. Twilight and Rainbow Dash however, looked amused.
“Wait,” Rainbow snickered. “What did you even use to –“
“Forget about it.” Applejack cut off, irritated. “We’re not talking about this. Ever.” A silence followed, with everyone smiled knowingly at Applejack. The Blonde mare blushed even more. “You can all kick rocks!” There was a noise off in the distance. Twilight stood up.
“Everypony stay put,” she said, as she left.
***
Not too far away, Rarity was sitting under a tree, shivering and jumping at every noise. She was still wearing Applejack’s hat. Using her magic, she trained Pinkie’s camera to herself. “It’s so…cold ,” She shuddered. “My ankle is a little worse off than I let on.” She turned the camera to her leg. Blood was seeping through the bandage. “I’ve lost quite a lot of blood.” She turned the camera back to herself. “It’s time to be honest,” The unicorn said earnestly. “I’m no Element of Generosity. Not tonight..”
***
Back at the campfire, the four ponies were huddled together, silently watching the flames. Pinkie could sense the tension and fear in the group, and decided to try to lift their spirits. She started to sing softly…
Close your eyes, Give me a hand, darling
Do you feel my heart beating? Do you understand?
The others were watching Pinkie with silent curiosity. Feeling comforted, Fluttershy leaned her head on Pinkie’s shoulder, and started to sing along with her.
Do you feel the same? Am I only dreaming?
Is this burning an eternal flame?
Applejack looked over at Rainbow Dash, who looked back at her with a blank expression. The two finally joined in the song.
I believe it’s meant to be, darling…
***
Rarity continued, with tears streaming down her face. “I would like to apologize”, She whimpered. “I’m sorry, Sweetie Belle, that I didn’t spend as much time with you like I should have… but I’m fairly certain… that you are going to grow up to be a fine young lady. Mom and Dad… I’m sorry that I didn’t visit you as often as you would like…you did a fine job of raising me… and I’m sorry if you felt insulted when I insulted you clothing choice…”
***
At camp, everyone got into the song, singing in a perfect melody…
I watch you when you are sleeping
You belong with me Do you feel the same?
Am I only dreaming? Or is this burning
(Burning) An eternal flame?
Say my name..
Pinkie stood up on all fours, lifted her head up proudly, and delivered the next part of the song while the rest of the ponies vocalized.
Sun shines through the rain, My whole life… so lonely—
“Hey, Guys!” The singing immediately stopped as Twilight appeared from behind them with a fake smile plastered on her face. “Hi. Yeah, how about we don’t attract attention ourselves by singing a song? ”
Rarity was getting worse by the moment. She shudders as she looks around at the darkness. “I’m going to die out here,” She whimpered. The fashionista sniffled, and looked into the camera lens again. “Girls… you are… the best friends I could ever…ever…” Rarity collapsed on the ground. The camera was still on the unicorn, although it was on the ground beside her. Suddenly, a big hairy creature came up behind her. The creature lifted her up over his shoulder, and carried her off into the night.
