As Hearts Harden

by Autumn_Fire

Rating: teen
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, Sad, Main 6, Applejack, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Nurse Redheart, Tragedy, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life
Length: 3111

Something is very amiss and it could lead to the loss of a pony

Twilight decides to end her own life when she is pushed too far and everypony tries to grapple with the loss of one of their best friends.

Published 2014-08-25 13:30:04 UTC
Last updated 2014-08-25 13:30:04 UTC

Black as Night

It had been nearly three days since Rainbow Dash had seen Twilight and she was getting extremely worried. Though she may have been mad at her for calling her dumb and everything, she was still one of her best friends and she knew that she was just in a lot of pain right now. She couldn't bare the thought of one of her best friends suffering all alone. She flew quickly to Sweet Apple Acres to see if Applejack had any idea as to the whereabouts of her friend.

When she touched down she saw that both she and Big Macintosh were busy bucking tons of apples. She quickly ran over to her.

"Hey, Applejack?" Rainbow dashed asked

She kicked down a large load of apples into a large wooden tub sitting just below the tree.

"Yeah, sugar cube?" Applejack replied, sweat dripping from every inch of her and panting like a worn out dog

"Have you seen Twilight anywhere? It's been nearly four days."

"Nah, I haven't." she said "I have been working the orchard non stop for the past few days. What's a matter? Did you all have a scuff or something?"

"Something like that. I'm over it now. I am just worried is all."

"Maybe Pinkie has some idea? She seems to know the whereabouts of everypony in Equestria."

"Alright. I will check with her next." Rainbow Dashed paused for a moment "She does have the zipper off her mouth doesn't she?"

"I believe she does."

"Did we ever find out who did that?"

"I'm 'fraid not. Once that spell wore off she wouldn't say a peep. She just said that it wasn't important. I wonder what has gotten into her?"

"Well, I'm about to find out."

Rainbow Dash made a huge bolt up to the sky, nearly knocking Apple Jack on her back, and flew straight to Sugar Cube Corner. There, she found Pinkie Pie sulking.

"Pinkie Pie?" Rainbow asked in surprise "What's wrong with you?"

"I don't know." she said quickly "I just feel this bad energy floating around. I feel like it may be my Pinkie Sense but I have never gotten these sensations before."

Pinkies ears flopped back and forth separately from each other several and she got a long shiver running throughout her body, as if she was sitting inside a cold freezer.

"It feels almost like..." Pinkie stopped mid sentence "never mind... that couldn't be... It couldn't..."

"What couldn't Pinkie? You're starting to scare me."

"Don't worry about it. I am sure it's nothing."

"Anyway, I wanted to ask you something: Have you seen Twilight anywhere? She hasn't been around in over four days now and I am starting to get worried."

A sad look played across Pinkie's face.

"I don't know a-and... and I don't care."

Dash could see that she was try to stifle back some tears. Something was definitely wrong.

Night came and she has asked every pony in Ponyville if they had seen her but all the results had turned up with unknowns. It was time to visit the Golden Oak Library to see if she was just laying about at her home.

She flew swiftly to Twilight's residence to find every light was off and all the blinds we shut. She reached the door and put her ear next to it. Complete silence. It was so quiet you could hear a pin drop. She tapped on the door with her hoof.

"Twilight? Are you home?"

There was no reply, just more silence. She tapped again, a little harder this time, and noticed the door was unlocked. Now she was worried.

She slowly walked inside and felt a certain chill about the place. It was a very sinister cold, like fresh snow from a Windego being pressed directly against her fur. She shivered and stiffened. Through the faint moonlight she could see a large dark outline. She finally found a candle and put a flame to it. She shrieked in pure terror.

Broken Pieces

Broken Pieces

A loud scream rang throughout Ponyville like a hot knife through butter. It could be heard all the way out in Sweet Apple Acres and it made Applejack's blood run cold as ice and her heart skip a beat. She jumped straight out of her bed to see where such a terrible scream had come from. She could see Fluttershy flying full speed toward Ponyville and she decided to follow suit. When she arrived she saw both Rarity and Pinkie Pie were there as well.

"Did y'all here that?" Applejack asked

"Most certainly." Rarity said with a shiver

"Yeah.. it was quite terrifying.." Fluttershy said timidly

"Who do you think screamed such a horrible scream?" Pinkie asked in a quick manner

"I'm not sure. But it sounded like it came from the Golden Oak Library." Fluttershy said

"Do y'all mean to say that Twi is in trouble!? We need to hurry it up then! Let's get a move on!" Applejack said and they all dashed towards Twilight's house.

When they arrived the door was unlocked and there was only a single candle lit.

"This is bad... this is very very bad..." Fluttershy said anxiously

Applejack rushed straight in to investigate and her mouth fell agape.

"Applejack?" Rarity asked concerned "What in the name of Celestia has gotten into-"

Her words cut short when she saw Rainbow Dash on the floor completely unconscious and Twilight hanging by a rope from her neck. Dead. Rarity's eyes begin to fill with tears and she dipped her head, unable to speak. Applejack just stood their, completely stunned and unable to believe what her eyes were focusing on. Fluttershy remained outside, her fear getting the better of her. She had no idea that one of her best friends lay dead inside.

Applejack finally broke out of her trance and ran up to Twilight's body, using her strength to knock her down from the fan. Rarity remained a motionless crying heap, unable to speak or think clearly.

Applejack checked her friends neck for a pulse. It was silent and her body was colder than ice. Tears began to form in her eyes and splashed over her friends lifeless face.

"N... N-no... This... this couldn't be..." Applejack said to herself "She must still be alive... she... she has to be... this..."

Applejack then broke into uncontrollable sobs, cursing the heavens for taking such a beautiful pony away from her. Fluttershy then began to creep slowly in. Her eyes immediately filled with tears of sheer pain.

After about an hour of this, Applejack slowly pulled Twilight atop her back. Rarity did the same of Rainbow Dash. Together they walked slowly to the hospital to see just what had happened.

Funeral Processions

Funeral Processions

The five of them spent the night in the hospital. Rainbow dash awoke on several occasions, screaming and crying, no doubt from a nightmare about Twilight Sparkle. It was after the fifth nightmare that she refused to close her eyes again. She was just simply too afraid. The other four were fairing no better. Fluttershy wouldn't go to sleep to begin with, Applejack wouldn't stop tossing and turning, and Rarity merely stared out the window thinking deeply, but not saying a word. At some points she would even forget to breathe momentarily to which she would start heavily panting. By the time six o'clock in the morning rolled around, they got the answer they were all afraid of.

"So," Applejack began, her voice quivering "What is the story on Twi?"

"She didn't make it." said Nurse Redheart with a glum look on her face and her eyes hidden by her hair "She had died at least three days ago... there was just no way to save her..."

Rarity finally began to cry again. Silently of course, for she felt that it wasn't lady like to cry in front of others. But the more tears that came out the more she began to shake uncontrollably and whimper. She just could not continue being brave.

About six days after the incident Twilight's funeral began in the Ponyville Cemetery. Everypony had put on their nicest black dresses as courtesy of Rarity and almost all of Ponyville was in attendance. Even the three princesses Celestia, Luna, and Cadence along with a large portion of Canterlot we also there to mourn the loss of such a shinning star.

The coffin containing Twilight was beautiful. It was a nice red oak with a silver finish. Placed atop the coffin was one of Twilight Sparkle's favorite books The History of Contemporary Magical Spells and Hexes.

Princess Celestia walked up to the Podium and began a speech but the grief made it too hard to focus. Twilight's mom, Starshimmer Velvet, ran up in the middle of the speech, crying furiously. Even Princess Celestia, strong and calm by nature, could no longer hold back her tears. Large, salty tears streamed down her white cheeks.

Large storm clouds formed over the sky without the Pegasi moving them into place. Rain quickly pelted the scene. It was only because their hearts were beginning to harden due to the nature of such a hard loss.

As the ponies left the scene the only one who remained was Rainbow Dash. Applejack, Rarity, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie quickly joined her side.

Rainbow rocked back and forth, tears still running down her face. Her mane was in shambles and looked as if it had not be washed for days.

"I-I could have saved her... If only... If only I didn't call her an egghead so many times... If only I had checked on her... If..."

Rainbow Dash's face contorted with pain, as if she had been punched straight in the gut. She had an uncontrollable amount of tears pouring down her face.

"There, there sugar cube. There's nuthin' we could have done. It was her choice, not any of ours." Applejack said tenderly, rubbing her back with her hoof

All Rainbow Dash did was cry. She didn't know how she was going to make it without her friend, Twilight Sparkle. What was a beautiful, shinning, Utopian world where every dream came true, now was becoming a dark, bleak world, filled with nothing but empty promises and broken lives.

Epilogue

Epilogue

The Mane Six (now subsequently the Mane Five) were never the same since that tragic day. Ponyville itself seemed to be covered in a long shroud of darkness that sucked everything into it's void.

Rainbow Dash never spoke after the day of the funeral. Nor did she ever do any work as a weather pony. Something inside her snapped that day. All she did any more was lay on the highest cloud she could possibly find and look out into the distance or sleep.She was now just a hollow shell of what was once Rainbow Dash.

Fluttershy never left her cottage again. Her anxiety had gotten so terrible she feared that merely walking out of her house would lead to her being hurt or killed. She cried much more often than she used to and over the smallest things. She eventually wouldn't eat any longer.

Applejack returned to her life at Sweet Apple Acres. Though she wouldn't admit it, something had definitely changed within her. She was a lot colder than she used to be and she would snap frequently. She didn't talk much and preferred to be alone in the orchard. And no matter how brave a face she put on, she couldn't hide the fact that a large part of her had been buried along with Twilight.

Rarity was always somber and very depressed. She would have frequent spells of tears and melodrama to avoid thinking about how much the loss had effected her. She became a workaholic and would spend weeks, sometimes months, behind a locked door working on dresses that were mediocre compared to the eloquent, flashy, and absolutely astonishing ones they had previously been.

Pinkie Pie had sunk to an all new low. She would rarely exit her room and when she did she would be prone to fits of madness, similar to schizophrenia. She became very bitter and harsh towards others. Instead of taking pride in seeing smiling faces, she was jealous of them. She felt that if she couldn't be happy nopony else should be either.

Celestia, Luna, and Cadence continued their royal duties. Celestia became almost mechanical. She seemed to no longer have any emotion and be seemingly almost apathetic towards the rest of her kingdom at times. Luna slept all day and worked all day, never speaking to anypony. Finally, Cadence spent her time trying to spread as much love as her weak heart would allow.

The lesson they all learned was the suicide is never an answer and this effects every pony in an entire kingdom. It leaves almost nopony untouched. And they all silently vowed to never let another event like this happen again.

A Star Glows Dimmer

Twilight stared down at her hooves, a horrible sense of regret and disdain washing over her body like a thick black cloud. How could she? How? How did she? How did she manage to end up to be such a horrible failure in everypony's eyes? She had to backtrack. It had been such an eventual past week, she had almost forgot some of what she had gone through.

First, she had gotten in a terrible yelling match with Rainbow Dash. She had been so stressed about studying for her most upcoming report about the History of Abstract Magic, (which was a topic so broad you could probably fit the entirety of Equestria in it and still have more to discuss), that she mindlessly snapped at Dash for her lack of studying, eventually calling her dumb. Rainbow Dash of course was not happy about this but, for some reason, she enjoyed seeing her friend in such pain. It made her feel better about her own hurt. Like she was finally in control of something.

Then, almost directly after the incident, Pinkie Pie came along to try to spread her over shining joy and cheer. But, boy, was Twilight not in the mood for such nonsense. She kept getting in her face and for some reason, maybe it was purely instinctual, she cast an incantation that zipped Pinkie's mouth tightly shut, preventing her from speaking for two days straight.

After this her friends began to distance themselves far from her. Even Spike, her most loyal assistant, wanted to keep as far away from her as possible. At least for the time being, but she didn't know that.

What if they all hate me? Twilight thought in complete and absolute despair. She recalled all of the marvelous adventures they had been through. The struggle, the laughs, the tears. They had been through so much together. Yet, all it took was two angry outbursts for them to start hating her? What if... they had always hated her? Maybe she was never even their friend to begin with! Maybe they didn't actually "love" her, they only "tolerated" her? Twilight Sparkle noticed that outside her library it has begun to storm quite fiercely. Rain hit her window at an incredible rate and thunder boomed periodically. It was just like the storm within her own heart.

Large tears began to form in the purple mares eyes. She was alone again. Just like she was in Canterlot. Only this time even more alone than before with Spike leaving her. She just couldn't take it! What was her life for if she had no friends to enjoy it with? Out of the corner of her tear soaked eyes she noticed a long rope sitting peacefully on the floor.

It was time for her to take things into her own hooves. And nopony was going to stop her. Not like they care much anyway.

The Light Fades

Twilight used a simple levitation spell to guide the rope up to her. She was surprised that a failure such as herself could do it. At least she was good for something now. It was time to put Equestria (and herself for that matter) out of their misery of having to suffer with such a dumb and useless friend as herself.

She looked at the fan in bed room and closed both the blinds. Nopony should have to see this. It wasn't right. But maybe Pinkie would throw a big party, celebrating her death... She knew she would. She was the worlds worst friend after all.

She carefully used her levitation spell to tie the rope into a nose and then tied it around her ceiling fan. Then, standing on the edge of her bed, placed her head snugly through the hole. She had almost forgot the most important step in ending her life! Writing the letter. How careless she had been! She really was an idiot wasn't she!?

She pulled her head out and got back on the floor, gathering her quill pen and parchment. Then, after a long pause she began to write:

Dear Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Apple Jack, and Pinkie Pie,

I am sorry for being such a horrible friend. I am sorry for being such a loser egghead. I am just... sorry. I shouldn't have called you dumb Rainbow Dash... I am the real stupid one here. Pinkie, I am so sorry that I zipped your mouth closed for two days. That was such a horrible thing to do.

I know you all must hate me. And heck, I deserve it. I have never really been that good a friend anyway. But it will be better this way-

A few tears began to fall on too the parchment as she began to write her final words. She took a deep breath and continued writing:

and now you will all be happier knowing that the worst, dumbest, and meanest pony to ever exist will finally be out of your hair. Forever. I love you all.

Best wishes,

Twilight Sparkle

She began to cry hard, unable to truly believe that she has been pushed this far. But there was no turning back now. It was now or never and she wasn't about to freak herself out from doing something the clearly needed to be done.

She got up on her bed and stuffed her head back into the rope.

This is it I guess Twilight thought. And with that, she pushed off, succumbing to the darkness that had building in her for years. She swung back and forth for a long while before the final light drifted far from her eyes and fell into the bitter embrace of death.