Living with the Night

Chapter 8

Revenge!

Thunderlane didn’t get a wink of sleep last night, or the night after the prank war had been declared. Large black bags hung under his eyes and his feathers were a mess. Normally the dark Pegasus took time to make himself look somewhat presentable, but he didn’t risk being pranked during his most vulnerable moments. He was soon approached by a similar looking Caramel.

“He get you yet?”

“No, I’m going bucking crazy man!” He said while shaking. “I can’t work, I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, granted that last one is because AJ revoked my bed privileges for that ass comment.”

“Couch?”

“Worse, dog house and Winona hates sharing.” He cracked his back and groaned. The two heard something crash land behind them and the two took cover under a nearby bench. They heard a groaning noise and saw the blue furred Pegasus stallion shake off the crash. They saw his tired eyes and helped him up.

“Thanks guys.”

“No problem. I see you’re not fairing any better.” The three heard a giggling sound and saw the spa ponies giggling at them. Not a cute girl giggle, more like a ‘you’re fucked’ giggle. “Oh shit. They’re organized!” Caramel stated. Normally Thunderlane was level headed, but the exhaustion was clouding his judgement.

“Probably has the whole town in on it!”

“Last night I heard Dash giggling saying, ‘No way will they see this coming.’”

“He’s recruited our mare friends! This is payback for all the shit we’ve done!” Caramel gulped. The three stallions were at the end of their rope and a thought occurred to the tan stallion. “He could even recruit one of you!”

“What?” Now you’re just being paranoid.” Thunderlane stated.

“Is he?” Soarin stated. “You guys are probably plotting against me for starting this!”

“I’ll admit it’s crossed my mind.” Thunder stated. The three pounced on one another and a scuffle ensued. Soon a familiar human walked up to them shaking his head.

“Hey!” He yelled making the stallions pause. The three got to their knees and were shaking.

“Whatever prank you’re gonna pull on us, just do it!” Soarin yelled.

“We can’t take any more just get it over with!” Caramel cried. Connor threw his head back and laughed like a manic.

“You fools, I already got you.” He said as they got up. The three looked at one another in utter confusion.

“What!?” The group looked to see a familiar spirit of chaos with a bag of popcorn. The human sighed and started walking with the group following him.

“That’s right. I sat back and watched as your fear took control and made you all nervous wrecks. It was quite a show.” The three looked at one another and their jaws hung open.

“You got your revenge without doing anything?” Discord asked.

“Bingo.” Discord blinked and looked at the mortals.

“I misjudged you Connor, you’re an evil genius.” The spirit stated.

“Thank you, of course I could be lying.” He chuckled.

“Say what?” The three stallions yelled.

“Look where you’re standing.” The stallions all looked down as saw they were standing on a giant X marked in the ground. The three looked at him in shock as they heard a whistling sound. Connor pointed up and the group saw a large dot fast approaching them.

“Oh buck.” They saw a flash and the group was covered in blue gel. The three were slipping in the substance and were trying to get to their hooves. “What the hell is this stuff?”

“Poison joke in gel form. Something I had Zecora whip up for me. Which should be taking effect, right now.” Connor grinned as Thunderlane turned pink,Soarin’s wings shrank and Caramel’s voice went up three octaves. He looked up and saw a familiar blue Unicorn poking her head out from the cloud above. “Nice aim Azure.” The mare then teleported beside him and smiled.

“That was most enjoyable.” She said with a laugh.

“Yes, now duck.”

“Hm?” Connor pushed the mare down as a water balloon flew over their heads. Connor turned to see Dash wearing a headband, black paint under her eyes like a football player and a series of water balloons on her belt. Connor got to his feet and cracked his neck.

“And so it begins.” He said as he took his coat off showing a super soaker across his back and several different smoke bombs. A rubber chicken was firmly attached to his belt like a sword. Dash saw her colt friend’s wings and gasped.

“No! I wasn’t done exploring those yet!”

“D-dash!” He said in a dramatic voice. “Avenge me!” He said before fake passing out.

“NO!” Dash cried before turning to Connor who was ready for combat. Dash put two fingers to her mouth and a pink ninja appeared out of nowhere. “This. Means. War!” Dash yelled as she threw more balloons.

Connor easily dodged the and pulled out two water pistols and shot at the mare. Dash easily evaded the water blasts. Luna was now dressed in a similar spy outfit and dodged some of Pinkie’s cupcake grenades.

“私は名誉のためにこれを行う必要があります！” The pink mare cried.

*I must do this for honor!

“あなたは私たちの手に倒れなければならない！” Luna replied.

*You shall fall by out hand! Luna’s horn glowed and summoned a few pies before launching them. Pinkie pulled out a rolling pin and deflected the pie dishes of disaster. Connor ducked behind a building and brought out another water balloon. He flung it at the cyan mare, in a matrix dodge it passed over her head. She back flipped and threw two more balloons that were on a collision course with the human. Connor jumped and barrel rolled them with the rubber chicken drawn.

Luna lifted up ten cupcakes and launched them at the pastry chef, but the pink mare was too quick for her projectiles. Pinkie got in close and tried to slam a pie in the mare’s face. Luna grabbed a balloon from her belt and dodged the pink mare’s pie. Pinkie smirked and luna saw something sticking out of the pie. Her eyes shrank as she saw the barrel of Pinkie Pie’s prank cannon.

There was a flash and Luna thankfully teleported out of the way of the blast that covered the tree in what appeared to be blueberry pie. Pinkie was getting frustrated with the mare constantly dodging her shots. She only had one more round left. She grinned as she pointed the cannon at the distracted human. Connor was busy dodging Dash’s water balloons. He turned his head and his eyes shrank as he saw the cannon

“Sayōnara.” Pinkie said as she let the cannon fire. Time slowed as Connor saw the pie closing in on his face meter by meter. As it got within a foot, Connor saw a flash of blue and felt something hard knock him off his feet. Connor felt his shoulder blades dig into the ground as he groaned. He looked down to see Azure covered in blueberry pie.

“Azure why? That was meant for me.” He said as she reached up and touched his cheek.

“No, this is my time...your future lies beyond this.” She gasped and coughed up some of the blueberry sludge. Damn she’s a good actress.

Thank you.

Aren’t you supposed to be dying? Luna coughed again and gripped his shirt as she leaned closer.

“Avenge me.” Connor felt something soft press against his cheek before Luna’s head fell back and she stopped moving. The man shook his blush away and gave an angry yell. Pinkie blew her nose into a polka dotted tissue.

“The feels!” She cried as Connor closed Luna’s eyes and cracked his neck. He turned to the two mares with angry eyes and ha held a crystal in his hands. His trump card. He grabbed a smoke bomb and covered the square in a cloud of thick grey smoke. Connor put a gas mask and goggles on to shield himself from the pepper he had mixed in with the smoke. The two mares were coughing up their lungs and their eyes were burning.

The two heard magical discharge and Dash flapped her wings to make the smoke disperse. Their vision returned and they stopped cold in their tracks. Standing five meters tall was a replication of Cheese Sandwich’s party howitzer. Dash remembered that during her birth-aversary, it had broken down and Connor had helped fixed it up. Cheese was so grateful that he gave Connor one of his older models and taught him how to work it.

“This. Ends. Now!” He hit the trigger and a large flash erupted from the barrel and the two mares were engulfed in the same blue jelly that had claimed Soarin and the other stallions. Dash was still recovering from the pepper to dodged and the two were propelled back into a nearby tree.

The mares popped their heads out of the gel and waited. Dash turned maroon and Pinkie’s lips grew three sizes. Pinkie stuck her hand out and waved a white bandanna signaling their defeat. “Victory!” He yelled as he collapsed from exhaustion. Luna got to her hooves and sat down next to the man.

“Congratulations.”

“Couldn’t have done it without you Azure.” The mare blushed and leaned over towards him.

“Yes, and now here is your reward.” Connor blushed as Luna’s half lidded eyes locked with his. He was so captivated by her baby blues that he didn’t notice the pie in her hand before it was smashed on his face. “Huzzah! We are the last mare standing!”

“Not quite.” The man said as he sat up. “You see I figured you might try something so I planned ahead.” Luna saw a remote in the man’s hand and heard mechanical creaking. She looked behind her to see the cannon pointing right at her. The princess was engulfed in the same gel that had encased the other two mares and Luna’s fur was already tingling. She felt as though she was being swallowed by her fabric as she slid out of the muck.

She heard Dash’s boisterous laughter and Pinkie pie sputtering a she giggled. She looked forwards and saw the man and Discord, who had reappeared laughing on the ground.

“I take back what I said Connor,” Discord said wiping a tear from his eye. “you’re no genius. You’re a mastermind!”

“I aim to please.”

“What are you two-” Luna shut her mouth and looked down to see that her hands looked smaller. In fact, everything looked bigger to her. Luna was only an inch shorter than Connor, now he looked like a giant. “Why are my hands small?” Her voice had also changed to a more squeaking nature. Discord, gasping for breath summoned a mirror and Luna’s world shattered.

She was no taller than Pipsqueak, shorter even. Her once long mane now stopped at her shoulders. Thankfully her bracelet kept her disguise up, only now it looked like she was seven years old. “What the buck!?”

“Now now, Azure. That’s no way a young filly should talk.” Connor said in a teasing tone. Luna’s eyes were like two blue flames.

“You will pay for this!” She yelled as she charged her magic. She let loose a magic ball that deflated like a balloon before it even got within a foot of the human.

“Looks like your magic got downsized.” Discord laughed. An idea came to the man and he chuckled.

“Discord, you got a camer-” Discord was one step ahead of him and snapped a few shots of Luna, much to her rage. With another snap, the photos were materialized and Connor grinned. “Thanks, now I must leave you!”

“Get back here!” Luna would have ran after the man, if only her clothes had absorbed the effects of the putrid jelly and shrank along with her. She glared at Discord and pointed. “Give me clothes!” Discord looked down at his brown vest and red tie.

“I don’t believe we’re the same size.”

“We command you to give us clothing!” She stammered.

“Sounds like somepony’s having a temper tantrum.” Had Luna had her powers, Discord would be nothing more than a pile of ash. She realized that bargaining was her way out.

“I’ll tell you where my sister keeps her diary!” Discord’s eyes boggled and the clothes Luna had previously worn shrank to her body size.

“Deal. Now where?”

“It’s hidden inside ‘1001 Ways to Bake Cakes’ it’s on the top of her bookshelf.”

“Then I take my leave. I have some reading to do.” He vanished in a puff of smoke. Dash and Pinkie were still on the ground as Luna ran after the human who was headed towards Twilight’s castle.

~~~

It was a lazy Thursday morning. Just how Spike liked it. The teenage dragon had grown accustomed to Twilight’s crazy study habits. She spent the previous night reviewing the ancient Griffonian war. The dragon was dusting in the hallway when he heard the front door being flung open. The dragon walked towards the noise and saw the panting human.

“Um morning Connor.” The dragon said with a raised eyebrow.

“Oh good, just the dragon I wanted to see.” Connor ran up to him with a piece of paper in hand. “I need you to send this to Celestia.”

“Where are you wretch?” The squeaky voice of doom yelled out.

“Now would be appreciated.” Spike wasn’t sure what was happening and he really didn’t care. The dragon made the paper vanish in a flash of green flames as the door opened to show the small blue mare.

“Aha!” Before Connor could react the filly tackled him and her small fists pounded on his chest.

“This is the most adorable beating ever!” He cried out.

“Stay thy tongue! Where is that photo?” She yelled.

“What is with the racket?” The three looked up to see Comet in a T-shirt and shorts. His mane was a mess and he had dark circles under his eyes. He froze as he saw the blue filly on top of the man and started chuckling before bursting out into full laughter. “My ribs!”

“Stop laughing at us!” Spike’s ears perked up. There was only one pony he knew that talked like that.

“Wait a second, Princess Luna?” The filly only blushed confirming his thoughts. The dragon then joined the other men and keeled over laughing. “This is hilarious!”

“Ugh! Would everypony just shut up?” A messy haired Twilight wearing a robe. She froze as she saw the scene before her. A small blue filly beating, or attempting to beat up the human, while Spike and Comet laughing their tails off. “What is going on?”

“Poison joke fired out of a howitzer during our prank war.” Connor explained. Twilight only face palmed as Luna glared at the man.

“Where is that photo?”

“I don’t have it! I swear!”

“Then where is it?”

“You should know in three, two-” The laughter of the sun Princess echoed through the hills of Equestria and was probably heard in the Crystal Empire. Luna slowly looked at the human and frowned.

“You didn’t.”

“Oh, I did.” There was a flash of yellow light and Princess Celestia, still in her white robe wiped a tear away as she caught her breath. It was soon lost in laughter as she saw the small blue filly.

“Oh my goodness!” She cried as she fell on the floor laughing. “You look so adorable Lulu!” She scooped the filly up and squeezed her.

“Tia!” Luna said as she tried to break free from the mare’s hold. She looked at the human who was chuckling. “Help me!”

“And interrupt a tender family moment? No way.”

“We will mount your head on the wall by day’s end!”

“Sound like somepony needs a nap~” Luna was foaming at the mouth and was ready to turn the human into a scraps. An idea came to her and she looked at her sister.

“Sister, I demand he be punished!”

“Oh come now Lulu, it’s only a prank.” She then turned her attention to Connor. “Is this temporary?”

“Oh yeah, quick splash in some herbal mix and she’ll be back to abnormal.” Luna snarled at the words.

“That is not what we are referring to!” The man raised an eyebrow. What else could there be? He hasn’t done anything except...oh no. A sly smile confirmed his suspicions. “We have deduced that Connor is a pervert!” That got Celestia’s and the groups’ attention.

“I am not!”

“We were dressed in a skimpy maid outfit!” Celestia raised an eyebrow.

“That was Thunderlane and Soarin’s doing!” This girl is trying to kill me! So long as Celestia doesn’t find out about the shower walk in...wait she can’t read mind too can she?

Yeah. I can. Celestia cracked her neck and bore holes through the man.

“Total accident I swear!” Celestia only glared. “I didn’t know she was in the shower!”

“Again?” Twilight face palmed. Celestia's grew wide eyed.

“Hey Twilight launched me through her damn tree and I landed in the Cake’s oven! It took Red Heart three bucking hours to get all the splinters out of my ass! Some were the size of toothpicks.” He sized them with his fingers. “Wanna see the scars?” He shuffled with his pant buttons.

“Not necessary!” Comet said holding up a hand.

“Still, he needs to pay!” Little Luna stated. Her tone was dead serious. Celestia couldn’t help but giggle at her sister.

“Oh you’re so cute Luna.” She squeezed tighter.

“Very true.” Celestia set her down and smirked.

“Perhaps you’d like to join her?”

“Wait what?” Celestia’s horn flared and Connor felt a tingling sensation around his body. He felt his body shifting and Celestia winced as she poured more magic into the spell. She felt some sort of resistance to her magic. Soon, there was a blinding flash and Connor felt his clothes become larger. His once tight fitting shirt now seemed more like he was wearing one of Big Mac’s sweatshirts. He looked down at his small eight year old hands and growled. “Oh come on!”

“Serves you right!” Luna stuck her tongue out while the group laughed. Connor was holding up his now loose pants and hid his bright red cheeks.

“Oh you look so cute!” Celestia cooed.

“This is SO not fair!” His voice was higher pitched.

“As soon as we are restored to our proper body, then you shall.” Luna stated. Connor rubbed his face and sighed.

“Aloe and Lotus have a cure in their spa. We can go there just as soon as I get some proper clothes.” Celestia’s horn flared and her appearance shifted. Her wings vanished and her flowing mane turned to golden yellow. “What’s with the look?”

“I wish to see how this plays out and to keep Luna’s cover. So for the time being, I am her older sister Sunny Days.”

“Fine, but I still need clothes.” The front doors burst open to show a familiar white mare with a purple mane and an animal caretaker.

“I heard that somepony needed-” She froze as she saw the two de-aged individuals and she burst out in a fit of giggles. Fluttershy squeed and scooped the human up in her arms and cooed.

“Oh you’re so adorable~!”

“F-Fluttershy put me down.” The human stated. The mare ignored his cried and she squeezed him tighter. Connor’s face was a deep red, mostly due to the fact that Fluttershy was suffocating him with her strength and large breasts, not the worst way to die by any means but still.

“Idea~” Rarity chimed.

Oh god no.

What? Has she got the antidote?

No! She’s going to use us for dress up! That made Luna cringe and started to run only to be stopped by a yellow glow wrapping around her.

“Not so fast Azure~” Celestia cooed. Rarity then noticed the tall blonde mare.

“I don’t believe we’ve met.” She put her hand out. “Rarity.”

“Sunny Days, I’m Azure’s older sister.”

“Well, it’s a pleasure to meet you. Feel free to come along.”

“You’ll pay for this!” Luna yelled as she and the human were dragged off towards the mare’s boutique. The more the man struggled in the yellow mare’s grasp the tighter she squeezed.

“Rarity please, just get us to the spa so Azure can get back to normal and then I can get my real body back.” The man pleaded.

“Sorry dear, but that’s not possible.”

“What?” Luna asked.

“After Rainbow Dash and Pinkie got cured the twins ran out of ingredients to make the antidote.”

“What!?” Luna yelled.

“Don’t worry, they already left to go see Zecora to get more ingredients, but it’ll take a few hours to collect the ingredients and brew the bath.” Fluttershy said as she rubbed the human’s head. The two entered the boutique and Connor dreaded what strange monstrosities she was going to force the two into.

“This is all your fault!” Luna said glaring at the man.

“You slammed a pie in my face! I just retaliated. It’s your fault!”

“Is not!”

“Is too!”

“Is not!”

“Is too!”

“Now, now. That’s no way to talk to friends.” Fluttershy said ever playing the role of the mother. The two turned their backs to one another. Connor was first and Rarity outfitted him into several cute outfits. Unfortunately, Dash, Pinkie and AJ walked in when he was in the dreaded sailor suit. Their laughter could be heard for miles. Luna joined in a few rounds as well.

“It’s you turn now Azure~” Connor finally got justice as he put on a pair of dark grey pants, black shirt and grey vest. Luna was squeezed into blue ballerina outfit. The amount of dawws were uncountable. Luna’s face was bright red making her look like a raspberry. Next came a dress that looked like it came out of the Victorian era, complete with a small umbrella and tiny hat.

When this is over I shall seek eternal vengeance against Generosity. Luna broadcasted into the man’s head. She then teleported the clothes she was wearing onto her body.

I get second dibs. The child walked over to his battle clothes and grinned. He had one more smoke bomb. Luna, on my mark make for the door. We find Zecora, get her to make you an antidote. Then you turn me back to normal. Deal?

Deal. While the vultures of fashion weren’t looking, Connor and Luna nodded. The two slowly snuck towards the door. A rope then came around the two and dragged them back inside.

“Just where do ya think you two are headed?” AJ asked sweetly.

“To see if they have the ingredients ready so I can get back to normal!” Connor yelled as he and Luna struggled in the restraints.

“Just one more outfit please?” Rarity whined. She gave them both puppy dog eyes. “Then we’ll let you both go.”

“Pinkie promise?” Rarity went through the motions and nodded. “Fine, but just one more!” Rarity beamed and the two walked back into the changing room. Connor found what looked like a tuxedo. He groaned and put the infernal thing on, if he were normal size then he would have taken time to admire Rarity’s work. Right now all he wants to do is get back to normal. He came out and grumbles as all the mares cooed.

“Oh you look so handsome!” Pinkie chimed. The sound of a curtain moving caught the group’s attention. Connor’s face went bright red. There was the little Princess wearing what looked like a blue wedding gown. A small tiara sat atop her head and a small bouquet of flowers in her hand.

“Why do you have us in a wedding...oh.” She blushed brightly as she looked at Connor. The mares all squealed at the cuteness and rarity took a few pictures before the two went back inside their dressing rooms. Thankfully Connor was given a grey long sleeve shirt and blue jeans for a more contemporary look.

“A deal is a deal Rarity. Now can we go?”

“Fine.” She sighed. As they were walking towards the door, they noticed that the mares were following.

“So what do you two want to do now?” Pinkie asked.

“Go home and wait for the antidote.”

“I second that.” Luna said. Pinkie gasped and jumped in front of the two.

“Wait a second, you have a chance to relive your childhood and you’re not going to enjoy it?”

“Um, yeah?” Luna immediately regretted the answer as Pinkie frowned. Few ponies can say that they’ve seen Pinkie angry. This was a first for the human.

“There is no way that I am going to let you two squander this opportunity!”

“You’re not?” Both of the youths said unison. Pinkie then picked them up under each arm like she was carrying two bags of potatoes. She stomped through town making a scene and Connor heard giggles from all sides.

Luna, if we kill them can we get charged as minors?

I was wondering that myself. The group found themselves at Sugar Cube Corner. The two were sat down across from one another in a booth and waited. Pinkie came out with a plate stacked high with a large cake, covered in several different kinds of ice cream complete with three cherries on top. The groups’ jaws hung low at the sight and Celestia’s mouth was watering.

“Behold, the ultra, super, awesome triple layered cake. It’s got everything. A layer of vanilla, chocolate and strawberry. Topped with three different kinds of ice cream and three cherries.” Pinkie said in a very pride filled tone.

“It’s too awesome.” Dash said.

“It’s beautiful.” Celestia said with a sniffle.

“It’s...there are no words.” Rarity said. Luna and Connor’s eyes were wide.

“C-can we eat it?” Luna asked.

“I don’t know,” Pinkie pulled out two metal spoons. “can you?”

“Challenge accepted!” Connor stated as he grabbed a spoon and dug into the masterpiece before him. Luna was right behind him with spoon in hand. Ten minutes forty-five seconds. That’s how long it took to completely devour the sugary creation in front of them. The bowl was nearly empty, only one last cherry remained. Luna’s eyes were fixed on the small red fruit. Connor sighed and shook his head.

“Go ahead, have the last cherry.” All eyes turned to the man. Though it may not seem like a big gesture, for a child offering the last cherry was like giving the other a kidney.

“Th-thank you.” Luna said with a blush on her face. Rarity couldn’t help but fawn at the words.

“So now what?” Fluttershy asked.

“Well, they just ate about fifteen pounds of sugar. So now all that energy has to go somewhere.” Dash said. The mare had an evil idea and ‘booped’ the human’s nose.

“Tag you’re it!” The mare then hightailed it out of the boutique with the human running close behind. The mares all looked at one another and couldn’t help but giggle.

“C’mon, we’d better make sure they don’t hurt themselves.” Twilight sighed. While the mares trailed behind at their own pace, the two downsized adults were tearing their way through market street.

“Get back here!” Connor yelled.

“You gotta catch me!” Luna teased. She was so busy taunting the man that she didn’t see the pony she barreled into. Luna landed on her butt as the stranger fell back.

“Hey watch where you’re going!” A female voice cried out.

“Why don’t you watch where your standing?” Luna shook her head and saw a white Unicorn mare with electric blue hair standing up. The mare adjusted her sun glasses and frowned at the filly before she was tackled by the human.

“Ha! Got you.” The human then noticed the mare and his jaw dropped. “Vinyl? When did you get back?”

“Do I know you?” Vinyl raised an eyebrow at the child. She had seen several humans on her most recent tour, but never actually got to know them too well.

“I bring your speakers back from the grave and you still don’t recognize me?” The child deadpanned. Vinyl’s jaw dropped and her red eyes looked over the child again. The gears stopped turning as everything fell into place.

“Connor!?”

“Took you long enough.” The mare burst into laughter as she clutched her stomach. “Yeah, yeah laugh it up.”

“The hell happened? You’re tiny!” He shot a dark look at Luna who only grinned sheepishly.

“Magic mishap.” Before Vinyl could continue laughing the group was approached by a charcoal Earth pony mare that had a refined air about her.

“Vinyl, I told you not to cause a scene.” She sighed.

“Oh relax Tavi.” Luna tapped on the boy’s shoulder to get his attention,

Who are they? They look familiar.

The white one is Vinyl Scratch, AKA: DJ Pon-3. She runs the music shop in town and is a DJ.

Why haven’t I seen her around?

Last I checked, she was on a tour.

And the grey one?

That’s Octavia, she’s a cellist in the Canterlot orchestra and Vinyl’s mare friend.

Mare friend?

Yup. The white mare rolled her eyes as Octavia lectured.

“Relax Octy, I was just,” She gilled as she pointed to the tiny human. “catching up with Connor.” Octavia looked at the young child and her eyes shrank.

“Oh my word.” She stifled a giggle. “What happened?”

“Long story.” The man face palmed.

“And who is this?” Octy looked at the blue filly. Luna smirked and gave them her best puppy dog eyes.

“Hewwo, my name is Azure.” She cranked her cuteness factor up to eleven with that sentence.

“Daww, what a sweet little filly.” Octavia cooed.

Yes, do my bidding mortal.

I heard that. Luna blushed as she realized she accidentally transmitted her thoughts into the man’s head.

“Don’t let her looks fool you, she’s a LOT older than she appears.” That earned him a slap in the back of the head from the mare. “Ow!”

“It’s not nice to make fun of a mare’s age.” Octavia lectured.

“I wasn’t! Azure got hit with poison joke, that’s why she looks so young.” He said as he rubbed the sore spot on his scalp.

“So that’s what happened to you too?” The white mare asked.

“No, I did that.” Azure said. “It’s his fault I’m like this anyway.”

“It was a prank war! What did you expect!?” Vinyl snapper her fingers.

“That explains the giant cannon I saw.” Connor sighed and turned his attention back to explaining their problem.

“So now I’m stuck like this until Azure here gets cured.” He grumbled.

“Poison Joke? I've got a cure for that.” Three heads turned towards the DJ.

“You do?” The three said in unison.

“Yeah, I was saving it for when I put some poison joke in Octy’s tea so she-”

“You were going to do what!?” The grey mare said as she glared daggers into her mare friend.

“Awe man!” Vinyl whined.

“Can we please get that cure? I don’t think I can take another round of dress up from Rarity.” Connor shivered at the thought of what other options the white fashionista’s demented brain could cook up.

“You poor child.” Vinyl gulped. She remembered when Rarity practically abducted her and made her try on formal wear. A DJ's worst nightmare. “Let’s get her a bath.”

“Thank you!” The two youths said in unison as they followed the mares.

“So how exactly do you two know each other?” Octavia asked as she looked at the filly.

“We’re roommates.” Connor stated flatly.

“Since when did you get a roommate?” Vinyl said as she looked at the human.

“About a month ago and I got out of the hospital. She’s Twi’s pen pal and I owed her a favor.”

“Right, I heard about the Tirek thing.” Vinyl said as they arrived at her and Tavi’s home. Vinyl walked over to her bathroom and pulled out a vial of blue liquid. “Here we are. You can use our bath if you want.”

“Thank you.” Luna said as she walked inside and closed the door behind her. Connor felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and answered the call.

“Hello?”

“Connor where did you and Azure go?” The librarian asked in a worried tone.

“We ran into Vinyl and Octavia. Vi has a poison joke cure and Azure is using it now, so tell Rarity to put her needle away. We’ll be back to normal size post haste.” He said ina triumphant tone.

“We’ll be right over.” Connor sat on the couch and waited until Luna was cured. Thanks to Discord, the mare’s clothes adjusted to her body size. When Luna came out Vinyl gave a whistle of approval.

“Nice catch Connor.” The man’s face grew bright red at the words and the group heard a knocking at the door. Octavia opened the door to see Twilight, Sunny, Dash and Rarity.

“Azure, I’d like to be normal sized now.”

“Oh but you look so cute~” Rarity cooed. “I have so many more designs I want to try.” There was only so much one man can take before he reaches his limit.

“Try it and I’ll dye your coat green while your sleeping!” The mare immediately backed off and she gulped. Rarity knew that the human always followed up on his threats. “Azure, please.” He begged. “I’d rather die than go through puberty again.”

“Fine, hold still.” Azure’s hands and horn glowed as she charged the spell. Sunny blinked and put a finger to her chin as she tapped on Twilight’s shoulder.

“Twilight.”

“Yes, Prin- I mean Sunny?” She quickly corrected herself.

“We brought Connor to Rarity’s boutique because he the spell I casted on him didn’t affect his clothes right?” Twilight nodded. “So what’s going to happen when-” The entire room was encased in blue light and the mares all covered their eyes and a faint ripping sound could be heard. The human stood frozen with his eyes closed for what felt like minutes. He opened his eyes to see his normal twenty-six year old hands.

“Yes! Back to normal. Nice work Azu-” He stopped when he saw Dash on the ground laughing her ass off. Octavia, Rarity and Twilight had crimson red cheeks. Vinyl’s sun glasses slid off her nose and clattered against the floor, revealing her wide eyes. Luna’s face was the deepest shade of red the man had ever seen. While Celestia was biting her lip to stifle a giggle. “Why are you all looking at me like that and why is it cold in here all of a sudden?”

“Damn, nice work Azure.” Vinyl chimed. Connor only looked at the mare in utter confusion.

“Um Conner, you might want to look down.” Celestia giggled as she looked at her sister’s red cheeks, wide eyes and she could just make out the smile slightly tugging at her lips. The man slowly looked down to see his naked skin a few ripped pieces of clothing on the floor near his feet. Any other guy would have died of mortification, Connor thought about doing just that until he hatched a plant.

“Twilight, Azure.” Their names being called snapped the mares out of their trance. “Consider us even.” Twilight keeled over from embarrassment right there. Vinyl quickly threw him a blanket which he used as a toga. “Thank you Vinyl.” The covering of the man’s naked body brought the mares back to reality. “Now, I’m going to go home and drink until I can’t remember what happened today.” He then looked at Luna.

“What?” She asked trying to advert her eyes from the man in the vain hopes of hiding her blush.

“I think it’d be better if you teleported us than walk through town like this. I mean, what would the public think?” He looked at the two musicians. Luna put a hand on the man’s exposed shoulder and charged her magic. The two found themselves inside their living room. Connor quickly made his way into his room and grabbed a fresh set of clothes before coming back down. Luna still couldn’t get that naked image of the man out of her head and was blushing brightly.

“We are so sorry Connor! We should have known your clothes wouldn’t have grown with your body.” The man waved her off and shrugged.

“Relax, it was an accident. Besides now we’re even.” He said as he sat down next to her. The man looked at his phone and he gasped. “I completely forgot! It’s trilogy day!”

“What day?” Luna asked.

“I watch the original Star Wars Trilogy back to back once a year!”

“Why?”

“Because the Empire wins if I don’t!” Luna raised an eyebrow at the man's words.

“I see. Just one question, what is Star Wars?” The man froze in place and dropped the remote. Time slowed as the device clattered against the hard wood floor. Luna saw shock and horror in the man’s eyes.

“What did you just say?”

“We’ve never heard of Star Wars.” Nope. He hadn’t heard wrong.

“What rock have you been living under woman!?” He yelled.

“The one floating in the sky for the past thousand years.” She dead panned.

“Okay, fair enough. To answer your question, Star Wars is one of the greatest film in the history of man and soon to be, pony-kind.” The man’s door bell rang and Connor answered it to see the white earth pony colt, this time dressed in normal clothes. “Pip, ya made it.”

“Uh-huh!” He smiled as he walked in to see Azure. “Greetings lass.” He said quickly adapting his pirate persona.

“Azure is gonna watch with us captain. She’s never seen it.” Pip gasped.

“Ye been marooned on an island landlubber?” Luna just frowned, but she couldn’t stay mad at the colt. Connor brought out his collector’s edition version of the original Star Wars trilogy.

“Now before we begin this epic quest, you two must know one thing;” The two leaned in closer to the man. “Han. Shot. First.” The man popped in the disk and took his seat between the two as they relived the story that took place a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away.

~~~

Meanwhile at Princess Twilight’s castle, the six mares and Sunny sat at the large table in deep discussion. Dash then stood up and slammed her hands on the crystal table. “I say we do it! I mean we all saw her reaction!” The cyan mare said.

“I must agree with you darling.” Rarity chimed. “Besides they looked positively adorable together.” The mares all gave a nod.

“Um, isn’t it rude to invade someone’s personal life? Especially when it comes to romance?” Fluttershy asked in her usual timid tone.

“Normally I’d agree with you darling,” The fashionista stated. “but if what Azure told us is true, then it’s been ages since she’s had a stallion’s or in this case, a man’s company.”

“I’m fairly certain, at least to my knowledge that Azure hasn’t had any intimate experiences.” Sunny stated. “From what she’s told me anyway.”

“I don’t know girls.” Twilight began. “You know that Connor doesn’t like others butting into his personal life and this is a huge invasion of privacy.” Twilight was also silently factoring in Azure’s true identity.

“Come on Twilight.” Pinkie whined.

“Ya gotta admit sugar cube, they do seem good together.” The farmer stated. “Plus ah really don’t think that Azure is the type of gal to judge a guy for being who he is.” Twilight knew what AJ was referring to. “Besides we owe the feller a lot. Heck without him we’d all still be single.” The mares all gave a nod at the words.

“Well, if it means anything, then I approve.” Sunny chimed in. “I’ve read the letters Twilight has sent to Azure and Connor sounds like an upstanding young man.”

“Thanks for the support Sunny.” Dash said. “Okay voting time. All those in favor of hooking Azure up with Connor?” Everypony raised their hands, Twilight was slightly more hesitant than the others.

“Great. We’ll meet here tomorrow and form a strategy.” Rarity chimed as the mares all left to get a good night’s sleep.