We hadn’t needed the Elements of Harmony in a long time.
And she hadn’t needed me even longer.
I’d been standing outside in the pouring rain for ten minutes, and I still hadn’t knocked. A big part of me wanted to throw the wilting flowers at the door and gallop off to some place warm and dry so I could spend the entire night wondering if she missed me…
But an even bigger part of me just wanted to feel that sweet sensation of joyous anxiety as she peeked out from behind the door and smiled. An even bigger part of me wanted to feel her soft, pearly coat against mine as her shimmering, sapphire eyes gazed longingly into mine.
I breathed shakily as my hoof slowly rose to the door, hesitated, and then softly knocked.
One minutes…
Two minutes…
The lights were on. She must’ve been home. What if I had the wrong address? This certainly seemed like a ‘Rarity’ type of house; all opulent with intricately-designed lace curtains and a soft, rosy hue of paint.
Three minutes…
It was going on four when a wisp of blue magic pulled back the curtains and quickly released them. Hoofsteps retreated. I could hear them travelling up the stairs… and then they stopped. She stopped. For some reason, I could just tell she was looking back at the door and smiling
Please let me in, Rarity.
The door slowly creaked open and the warm, welcoming lamplight spilt onto the porch, perfectly illuminating her angelic smile.
“Applejack?” she whispered, her smile slowly fading. “Oh dear… is something wrong? Nightmare Moon? Sombra? Has Discord finally backslid? Sweet Celestia, what does Twilight need me for now?” She opened the door a tad more and gestured for me to come in, a worried frown quivering on her lip.
I chuckled knowingly as I trotted in and stood of the interior welcome mat, soaking wet. “Nothing’s wrong, Rarity. Ah just… ah need y -” I clamped my mouth shut and blushed, deciding to backtrack on my words, “Ah just wanted to see mah old friend… it’s been far too long…”
Rarity eyed me for a moment before sighing in relief. “Thank Celestia, I thought there was something important going on… eek! No, no, no! Stay where you are, darling! You will get the floor all wet.” I quickly withdrew my hoof from her pristine, hardwood floor and planted it on the welcome mat once more, watching as Rarity trotted upstairs and took a left.
I supposed this was a good time to take a quick look around. Her house was far cozier than I had anticipated. The rooms weren’t exactly ‘small’, but they didn’t quite meet my expectations for a princess like Rarity. Had she finally grown more humble?
Hmm…
Nah.
It was quite apparent she was still her old self. The narrow hallway I stood in was adorned with multiple photos encased in ornate, wooden frames. Some were of Sweetie Belle, some of her parents, and some were even of our old friends. My eyes kept wandering back to my old friends. I had forgotten how much I missed them all. Those photos were of younger days and simpler times, back when our fights never went unresolved.
Despite popular belief, Twilight never grew an inch taller following her coronation. The only thing that had changed over the years was the new presence of wings and the lost presence of her smile. She was always so stern and business-like, carrying out her royal duties with military-esque precision and force…
There was once a time where she was the ‘Princess of Friendship’... that’s a laugh. She drove her only friends away long ago.
Rainbow Dash finally did become a Wonderbolt. I was mighty proud of her… we all were. She was hardly ever around for the next few months, since commute time to Cloudsdale and the several practices, shows and media appearances took almost all of her time. Eventually, she moved to Cloudsdale and always found an excuse not to return for a visit.
Pinkie Pie retired from being Ponyville’s number one party-planner. She met some stallion, moved to Fillydelphia and I heard she had two foals. I never got an invitation to their wedding or foal showers, so I decided to stay out of my rumored ‘cousin’s’ life. We all did.
Fluttershy was the only one who stayed behind in Ponyville. She never really changed at all, actually. She travelled a bit, but otherwise chose to stay holed up in her cottage with her animals. Without all of our friends to help bring her out of her shell, she backslid into intense social anxiety and generally avoided ponies. I spoke to her sometimes, but we weren’t as close of friends as I thought. We were all just holding onto one another by another friend’s glue.
And Rarity? Well, Rarity signed a contract with Sapphire Shores that required she live in Canterlot. She promised me she’d come back to Ponyville once it ended, but that was five years ago.
That was five years of waiting for her.
But she lied to me, and I was tired of waiting.
I blinked and realized Rarity has been standing there beside me, admiring the photos this whole time. She eventually turned to me and levitated the towel towards me and draped it around my shoulders.
“Thanks, Rarity.”
“Don’t mention it, darling. Can I get you anything? Tea, perhaps?”
I smiled and nodded softly, sitting down and running the towel over my forelegs. I usually shook myself dry, and the lack of magic only rendered my attempts more awkward. Rarity watched me for a moment, biting her lip slightly, before she seized the towel in her ethereal grasp and dropped it into her own hooves.
“Here, darling, let me help you.” she said softly, like a tired mother helping her foal reach the cookie jar on the high shelf. Stepping closer, she placed the towel on my foreleg and began to gently rub in a circular motion, a placid smile curling on her lips. “Just hold still for me.” She smoothed down my fur and went up to my neck, continuing to dry.
Eventually, she reached my mane and, leaning forward, bit the band keeping it in a ponytail. She smiled tenderly as my hairdo came undone and my soaked, straw-like mane fell over my face. She gently wrapped the towel around the hair and began massaging it until it was only slightly damp. By the time she had finished, my hind quarters had already dripped dry.
“There,” she cooed, “many hooves make light work. Now, about that tea…”
“Ah’ll have whatever y’all are havin’.”
With a slight nod of her head, she turned and trotted into the kitchen. “Feel free to have a look around.” she chimed. A quiet ‘mhm’ was my only response, as my mind was already on other things. The hallway led to a small room with a staircase leading up into a wall of darkness. The left led into the kitchen and dining room and the right, into a quaint living room.
Quietly, I trotted up the stairs and fumbled around for a light switch, eventually finding a small dial on the wall which I turned until the hall was dimly lit. The door at the far end was ajar, and from what I could see of it, must have been the remake of the infamous ‘organized chaos’ room where Rarity executed the majority of her fashion brainstorming. I took the left door, hoping it would lead me to a bathroom.
I found another dial on the wall and watched as the room slowly lit up. Unfortunately, I had not located the bathroom, but Rarity’s private boudoir. Ahem. I meant bedroom. Even I was beginning to speak fancy.
Centered against the wall was a king-sized bed with tall, oak pillars on each corners holding up lace curtains. Beside her bed was a round, glass table. A red alarm clock rested on it, next to a framed photo of…
Her and I.
I took a hesitant step closer to examine it. I was afraid that as soon as I blinked, the photo would vanish. No matter how many times I cleared my eyes, however, the image remained. I remembered that moment, but I couldn’t recall there ever being a camera there to capture it.
The two of us sat in a field. She, with her forelegs wrapped around mine, staring off with a contented smile, and I, tilting my stetson and chewing on a piece of wheat. I was blushing. I wonder if she noticed.
“Times have really changed, haven’t they?” Rarity said softly, smiling wistfully at the photo from the doorway. I nearly leapt out of my skin as I yelped in surprise and whipped around, breathing heavily.
“Oh, uh… Rarity! Sorry…” my face flushed a brilliant scarlet, “ah wasn’t trying’ to snoop… really, I-I just… uh…”
“Did you miss me?” she interrupted.
“What?”
She took a step forward, lurking towards me like a panther to its prey. She leaned forward. My blush only deepened as I contemplated whether or not to step back. Should I stop her? Is she drunk? Will she go and regret it immediately after?
“Did you miss me, Applejack?”
“W-well… guh… I…” I sputtered.
Maybe I'm getting ahead of myself here. Is she even going for a kiss?
She wasn’t.
“Tea’s ready!” she chirped, turning away and trotting down the stairs like nothing happened. I stood there, frozen in place, mumbling to myself with my eyes still wide open and my pupils shrunken.
So close.
Dammit, Applejack. You can’t just… you can’t do this to yourself…
“Are you coming, darling?” she called up from downstairs. I gulped and trotted down, trying to compose myself as best I could.
“Sure am.” I choked out, taking a seat at the table and forcing on a smile. What did you expect, Applejack? That she was really going to love you? Like THAT would ever happen. She trotted in a few moments later and took the seat across from me. With an orb of sapphire magic, she levitated the teapot and poured two cups of the steaming liquid.
“Milk or sugar?”
“Both. Two lumps please.” She nodded and spooned in two lumps and poured in a bit of milk. I watched as the cloud of white invaded the murky brown. “Thank ya kindly.” Rarity simply nodded and blew on the tea, her eyes searching mine. After taking a small, hesitant sip, she set down her cup and smiled.
“Ah, yes. Now you can finally tell me what you’re here for. As i recall, it wasn’t anything to do with the destruction of Equestria?”
“Well, no. Ah actually just wanted to talk to ya. Like old times, y’know? Ah really miss ya. Ah mean, ah miss the whole gang, but…” I wrung my hooves, blushing ever so slightly. I was trying to choose my words carefully so as to not reveal my true feelings for her prematurely.
She took another sip.
“You just wanted to talk then? Wonderful! How are our friends doing?”
“Fluttershy’s the only one left, actually… ah was wonderin’ when you were gonna come back… y’all promised me years ago that you would.” I glanced up expectantly at her. She only frowned slightly, took another sip of her tea and abruptly changed the subject.
“You never answered my question, Applejack,” she said stoically, “did you miss me?”
There she went again, dodging me. I clenched my hoof, banging it down on the table. The entire china set seemingly leapt into the air for a brief moment. Rarity sat there, her eyes widened slightly.
“P-please… be a little quieter…”
“Of course ah missed ya, Rarity! Ah damn well waited for ya all this time! Ah waited because…” I trailed off and looked away, biting my lip as tears began to from in my throat. I got up and trotted to the door, where my nearly-limp bouquet of roses still sat, propped up against the door. Retrieving it, I returned to the table and set them down in front of her.
“Ah waited because ah think ah still love you… and ah didn’t know how to tell ya because you were so… ya were so far away. Ya sent me fifteen letters. Only fifteen this whole. Damn. Time. And ah still kept them in a little bundle beneath my bed because ya know what?”
Rarity stayed silent, watching me intently. She seemed shaken. Slowly, she reached out and held my hoof in hers. She still didn’t speak, but I knew she was urging me to continue.
“Your letters were the only thing that kept me sane. Ah kept wonderin’ about ya… wonderin’ where you were goin’ or who y’all were meetin’. Ah kept wonderin’ if you missed me at all...” I had been trying to keep my voice calm, but I couldn’t seem to keep it from wavering, “those letters were the only things that gave me hope that maybe y’all could love me again.”
Rarity inhaled slowly. She looked tired all of a sudden. But there was something else in her eyes… I couldn’t quite place my hoof on what it was, but it pained me to see it dancing in her mind.
“Oh, Applejack…” she finally breathed, her sorrow-filled voice betraying her callous mask, “I’m so sorry… but you can’t… you can’t do this to me again… being your marefriend was one of the happiest times of my life. But that’s over now. I had to go to Canterlot, and you had to stay behind and look after Sweet Apple Acres… and just when I don’t need you anymore, you’re just trying to build me up again!”
I studied her with a quivering lip and watering eyes, my mouth falling open and shut as I fumbled to find the words.
“So, what y’all are tryin’ to say is -”
“I’m done,” she sighed, her entire form sagging, “I’m just… done.” She sniffled. She was clearly trying to fight back tears as she lifted up the bouquet of roses to her nose and inhaled. She squeezed her eyes shut and smiled.
“They’re lovely,” she said calmly, levitating them back to me, “but I can’t accept them.”
“A-ah’m real sorry they’re wilted…”
“Don’t be,” Rarity breathed, “sometimes beautiful things die, Applejack. But it’s not your fault.” She stood up and trotted to a cupboard, from which she withdrew a pink, porcelain vase, filled it with water and set the roses in. “They can be saved. If you put them in water quick enough, they can be saved… but our love waited too long.”
"But I..."
"Please stop trying to hold onto something that isn't there, darling. You'll only hurt yourself... our friends moved on, and now look at them! They're happy! They're successful!"
"Not all of them..." My lip trembled. “S-should ah go then?”
She nodded silently.
“It’s for the best, darling.” My head hanging low, I took the bouquet of roses in my teeth and trotted down the hallway. She followed closely after, levitating an umbrella made especially for earth ponies to me. “Here you go. You can keep it if you wish.”
“Thanks…” I said softly, doing my best to give an appreciative smile. Opening the door with some difficulty, I tilted my stetson to her and stepped out into the icy rain. She placed the umbrella on me and smiled.
“Goodbye, Applejack. It’s been fun.” She leaned forward and planted a kiss on my forehead.
I loved her.
I think some small part of me still had the day I left. And I wished some small part of her still loved me. But I knew there wasn't any hope of that. I couldn't help but wonder, as I stood on her porch in what little light flooded out from the half-drawn drapes and the icy rain, what would have happened if I had turned around. If I had simply left the bouquet at her door for her to find, dead on her doorstep, the very next day.
If I had left my little fantasy to live… would I be happier lying to myself?
“Goodbye, Rarity…” I whispered to myself, knowing she could no longer hear me. I released a breath I hadn't known I had been holding. As I began to trot down the wooden stairs of her porch, I heard a faint swish as a small, rectangular piece of paper slid out from the mail slot on the door. With an eyebrow raised and a quizzical frown, I lifted up the photo to my bleary, tear-filled eyes and smiled.
It was the photo. The one that I had seen in Rarity’s bedroom. A far smaller copy, but one nevertheless. I don’t quite know why, but it helped me feel a little less empty. The knot in my stomach loosened. And I smiled because I loved her. Our love was beautiful, but sometimes, beautiful things die.
We hadn't needed the Elements of Harmony in a long time.
And she hadn't needed me even longer.
Here's to the memories! Love, Rarity
Author's Note
Gosh, this is horrible. Please forgive me.
