Hey Celestia… Need a Pope?

by Anonymoose

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy
Length: 1097

Joe Average was just your average joe. One night, Joe attended a halloween party, dressed as Pope Benedict the fourteenth. An unexplainable event occurs, and Joe finds himself transported to Equestria, with the powers of the Pope.

Joe Average was just your average joe. One night, Joe attended a halloween party, dressed as Pope Benedict the sixteenth. An unexplainable event occurs, and Joe finds himself transported to Equestria, with the powers of the Pope, and all that they entail.

He is Pope Joseph the First, and he has one question for Equestria’s inhabitants:

Hey Celestia… do you need a Pope?

My contribution to the League of Humans Acting Piously. Lovingly dedicated to Rainbow Bob.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-11-05 05:39:59 UTC

Test, delete

1: Tell Me About Your Fic "This date is going to be perfect!" How did you come up with that?

Wow, how did I come up with that fic? I honestly can't really remember, it's been that long. I think it was a rehashed idea from another fic I cancelled.

It also came about because of the contradiction in my mind: Chrylight is so implausible, but I love it so much. And if you have read the sequel, This Date… Reprise, then you'll know how plausible I see the romance.

The other thing is Chrysalis. She is so alien to what pony culture would see as the norm, and that is always fun to play with.

2: How did you get interested in writing Pony fiction?

At the time, I couldn't tell you how I came upon FimFiction.net, I think I was reading a few tumblr ask blogs, and then a few deviantart comics, then I fell into the rabbit hole that was fimfiction.net.

The first fic I ever wrote was actually the Ditzy Doo story, Look Right Through Me, which I think at the time was because I had seen this really cute Big Mac/Ditzy fan art pic. And I am a huge shipper at heart.

3: What kind of research or work you did for the story?

For This Date? Hmm, a sum total of zero research. I have done some research for a few of my stories, notably Speciation (not sure if I am allowed to talk about that one, as it is a mature fic!), but for most parts, I don't do much research for my fanfics.

The bulk of the research is going over the episodes that might contradict the story I am going to tell, and deciding if I can work it into canon, or if I have to tag the story alternate universe.

Or just fuck it up, as I have in a few cases.

Maybe I should look into this research thing a bit more.

4: What is a typical day like for you? When and where do you write? And do you set a writing goal per day?

At the moment, writing for me happens whenever I can actually get to it. Prior to the birth of my first bub, I had set days, set targets, etc. These days I am lucky to remember to wipe my own ass, so fanfic is pretty low on my priorities.

Usually I write during my lunch breaks at work, or after 7:30pm when the bub goes down for the night.

5: What is the hardest part of writing for you?

Finishing a story that is worthy of the idea.

I've found, quite often, a good idea a story does not make. I've had ideas in the past that, in the end, I just had to give up on, as they wouldn't coalesce into a story I was happy with.

6: What is the best thing about writing?

Meeting new people. Honestly, I've made some pretty awesome friends through this. And just having fun.

7: What are you working on now?

Numerous things. I've actually stopped posting incomplete stories to fimfiction.net these days. Most of my longer, multi-chapter works are staying in gdocs only, until I am satisfied that they are done with. Then they'll move to fimfiction.net for others to read.

Beyond those, I am pretty much focusing on oneshots, as that is the sort of time my daughter will allow me.

8: What advise would you give to other authors?

1) Proofreaders, editors and grammar checking. Seriously. Nothing can turn a good story into shit faster than bad grammar.

2) Check with friends you trust to give you an honest opinion about your idea. What might seem like a great idea in your head may seem to others a big stinking pile of shit. There is nothing more heart breaking than pouring yourself into something and seeing it bomb.

3) Regarding the previous piece of advice: If a story does bomb, don't take it too much to heart. Don't rage against the readers, who don't understand your genius. Not everyone is going to enjoy what you write, but conversely, not everything you write is going to be gold. Accept that, and learn from it. Make your next piece better.

4) Don't be an asshole to your readers. If someone is nasty in your comments, nothing will rally other readers to his or her side than you calling them a twat-burger. I've seen a number of stories that have been downvoted just because the author didn't handle a negative comment with grace or dignity.

If your story bombs, or you're getting a lot of negativity, deal with it off site.

Another good one for starting writers is to get involved with a collab project.

9: Do you have any favorite fanfic authors or fanfics?

Hmmm, favorite authors would probably be: Rainbow Bob, Rated Ponystar, ThePrincessRarity and iisaw.

As far as a favorite fic goes, that one has to go to Cast-Iron Caryatid's Sharing the Night. I have read that one through multiple times.

10: If you were writing a book about your life, what would the title be?

"Help, I am stuck in a book."

11: What is your favorite word?

If we are going by statistics, I'd say the word 'Fuck', though that is just because I am a potty mouth.

12: What is your least favorite word?

Not sure I have any.

13: What turns you on?

Well, now… wouldn't that be telling.

14: What turns you off?

15: What sound or noise do you love?

I'm probably supposed to say something like "the sound of my babies laughter" or somesuch.

But in truth? The sound of a 1975 Shovelhead Harley Davidson.

So manly!

16: What sound or noise do you hate?

Silence, actually. Hate the complete lack of noise, drives me crazy.

17: What is your favorite curse word?

I think I discussed this earlier. Statistically speaking: fuck.

18: What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?

Teacher, actually… either English or History.

19: What profession would you not like to do?

Septic tank drainer. Seriously, and I mean no pun here, that job is shit. Worst six months of my life!

20: If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?

"I am powered by irony, you'll only find atheists in here!"