Chapters View Online
Silly Man, Trix are for Kids
prologue/Chapter 1:Drinking leads to violence
Prologue.
Equestria is a place of peace, the occational disaster may come yes, but order is always back by the week's end.
But not this time.
It was early morning in Canterlot, and the sky was overcast with ominous black clouds. Pegasi from every city came to try and clear the dark sky, but it was hopeless, this storm would come, ponies be damned.
And it did come, at noon a heavy wind set in, stirring dust, and debris. The snooty ponies of canterlot thought nothing of it, so it would rain, big deal. So they gather umbrellas, and stylish raincoats, and went about their way. The first drops of rain came soon after, icy cold, and making nobles Shiver. All the ponies were prepared now though, and didn't do much about it.
A faint wining noise began to fill the air, most couldn't tell what it was, few cared nor tried to determine it. That is until a nearby dinner table sat a café exploded under the weight of a falling body.
Most of the ponies in the area screamed, then immediatly wondered how someone had fallen out of thin air, heads all around the city turned to the sky, were the storm raged. Little black dots fell from miles up, out of the clouds. The shrill wining followed.
The serine calm of it all lasted several seconds before a stallion in his late thirtys, a retired royal guard, recognised the sound.
They were screams.
This day is now known simply as The Storm. That day screams filled the air, as thousands of people, humans, fell from those inky black clouds. When all was said and done, and the sky had cleared, the body count was high. Out of nearly eight thousand humans who fell that day, only a.few hundred survived. Lost and confused, these survivors, were given sactuary by a sympathetic Celestia. Every human who still lived, was given full citizenship, and the dead were given a.mass burial in a vally between mount Canterlot, and the surrounding mountains. A beautiful stone wall, and archway surrounded the massive graveyard, tended by the castle year round.
It did little to ease the pain of those first months, but would be a beloved place years later. No-one, pony, or human, could ever u derstand what caused that storm. Or what brought the humans to equis.
But this was eight years ago, and the lands have settled into peace once more. But many still had nightmares, the humans in particular.
~x~x~
Chapter one.
"Another shot please."
A glass of whisky was slid across the polished bartop, quickly caught by a hand, a human hand, which quickly raised the glass to it's owners lips.
"Ar'ight James, that the last fer tonight." Said the barkeep, an older pony. Cold Tap, a forty year old stallion, dressed in his fine stripped vest, with the pooch sleeved button up under it. His little red bowtie skewed just a bit, as he cleaned a glass. He wasn't much of a townsman, but to James he was like a father figure. Guess that speaks a lot about the human. And how much time he spent in the bar.
"Yeah, yeah I know Tapper, I know." James sighed, grabbing his jacket to leave.
He never made it to the door, as a sharp yell from across the bar caught his attention.
"Get your filthy hooves off me!" A woman screamed.
James turned instantly, dropping his jacket onto the floor. Cold Tap reached over the bar to him, trying to stop what he knew would be another barfight with the human involved. "Hold on James we don't-"
Jerking his arm out of Taps grip, he crossed the relativly small bar, over to one of the more secluded tables, were an overly drunk stallion, was harrasing a mare. From were he stood, she seemed to have been crying, which in Manehattan, wasn't very unusual but she also didn't seem to want said stallions company.
James placed a hand on the stallions shoulder, and spun him around.
"This lady would like to be left alone." He growled.
The drunken stallion huffed, and decided his head hurt to much to argue. Clumslimy he swung at James.
Now most people know a stallion that can't hold his salt, can't swing for much. But this guy probably wasn't ever told, because he tried it anyway, and like always he missed.
But James didn't, his fist met the guys muzzle with a solid thump. One that sent the stallion flying into the poor mares table. She scrambled back, away from the fallen male. "Oh sweet Celestia." She muttered, sitting on the floor.
James stratled the stallions waiste, quickly adding three more blows to his face, before the stallion rolled, throwing the human across the floor.
"Mind yer own." The stallion muttered, before kicking James roughly in the side.
When he turned back to the mare once again, she was staring at him in shock. He had grabbed his leg, pulling the stallion down again. Adding a kick to the ribs for good mesure.
James grabbed the dazed stallion, and dragged him to the door, were he was roughly tossed out. A stinging pain jolted down James back. A shard of glass, most likley from a bottle, was stabbed into his shoulder. Ignoring the pain, James walked back over to the mare, whom he now had time to properly look at. She was a unicorn, her coat was a sky blue, with a white mane, tinted with blue. Her figure was nice, with a slightly exaggerated hourglass shape. She wore a simple purple tanktop, with a black jacket, and blue jeans. Like all ponies she wore no shoes.
James offered her a hand. Which she gladly took. "Sorry about that miss. People like that ussually don't come here." He smiled at her. Before glancing at the door. "Well on off days mabye."
The shaken mare, smiled slightly, the fur on her cheeks still a bit wet. "Well for what it's worth, thank you."
James when to nodd, and winced. Which the mare noticed. "Sir, I think you're hurt."
James, in all his manly pride tried to convince her he was fine but she saw the blood on his nice white T-shirt. So she shushed him, and made him move over to a bar stool, where she took off his shirt, and looked at his back.
"Oh dear..." She whispered.
His back was a mess, and like the bars patrons, his blood was doing it's best to leave the area. Tapper walked around, first aid kit in hand, and gave the man a once over.
He sighed. Before moving over to give the mare space. "I hope you know what yer doin', cause I shure don't."
She snorted. "Yeah I know what I'm doing, my names Trixie by the way, what're yours."
Tapper pulled up a chair, and groaned when his sore hooves left the floor. "My names Cold Tap, this upstart," He motioned to the squirming human, whom Trixie was removing glass from. "Is named James Moore."
Trixie nodded, and grabbed a discarded, bottle of liquor, human made, and without warning, poured a generous amount onto the now glassles wound.
James jumped up at the pain. "Ah shit, that stings!"
The mare rolled her eyes, trying to stifle a laugh. "Oh it's not that bad, it's a shallow cut."
James just grumbled, while Trixie placed a piece of gauze over the wound. Taping it in place."See you don't even need stitches!"
Tapper laughed, then waited for James to redress himslef, before asking both to kindly leave his bar for the night. They complied, James wishing him a good night. Both stood in the cold night air, thankful for their jackets.
James offered to walk Trixie home, wherever that may be, and while they walked he struck up a conversation. "So Trixie, what where you doing in Tapper's bar?"
"Drowning my sorrows in salted meade." She replied.
James whistled. "Meade, heh, wouldn't have pegged you for a Meade drinker."
She smiled. "And I didn't peg you for much of a fighter, but you stood up for me pretty quickly didn't you?"
James only laughed. After walking, and chatting for quite a bit, they came across an open lot in the town. in which sat a show trailer, that seemed to have been there for white awhile. Weeds grew around its wheels, and a collection of potted plants, and crates sat outside it. A large crescent moon was painted on the wagon's side.
Trixie turned to James. "Well this is it, I guess I'll see you later James."
The man nodded. "Yeah, well if you need anything. Go to Tapper, he'll send you to me. Have a nice night Trixie."
James began walking, trying to get his mind away from the glances he had stolen at the mare's figure while they had walked. A few blocks away, he came to his appartment, a rundown building, that was close to falling appart. Ignoreing the signs about 'no trespassing' he walked in, and made his way to the third floor apartment number thirty two. Stepping in, he shut, and locked the door behind him, before grabbing his own stored bottle of whisky, and downing a good portion of it.
After weting his gullet, James laid down on the old matress lying in the would be living room. Wrapped in comforter he slipped into a restless sleep.
Author's Note
(AN: This fic is being rotten from a mobile smartphone during weekdays, I try to edit and revise from my laptop on weekends. If you see any sort of misspellings, or incorect grammar that is not intentional please leave a comment, and help me clean it up a bit.
Please, leave a comment on your thoughts! Have a nice morning/afternoon/night.)
Silly Man, Trix are for Kids
Chapter 2: Car (carriage) chase scene.
Chapter 2
Trixie shut her door behind her, once inside the small-ish wagon, she peeled off her warm jacket and replaced it with a quilt, covered in a checkered pattern. A bit of magic, and a cup of tea powder later, the unicorn was sipping away at warm tea. With a sigh her thoughs turned back to the bar, or rather the human from the bar. He was a bit of a looker, if a little rough around the edges. His gray/black hair, and warm green eyes, gave him a welcoming feeling. And though she hated to admit it, when he had removed his shirt, he revealed a toned, even muscular, body.
She violently shook her head, cheeks tinted red. "No! Bad Trixie! Don't think about the handsome human."
It took her a moment to realise what she said, to which she flopped back into her small chair with a groan.
'Be careful Trix, men like that can break hearts.' She mused.
Opening the book left on the chairside table. She began reading silently from where the little bookmark left off. An hour passed, before a sharp yawn made Trixie lose her place in the book.
"Damn." She muttered, deciding it was time for bed. Slipping out of her jeans, and top, she laid down on her built in bunk, on the wall. Wrapping a the still-warm quilt around herself she almost drifted off to sleep.
Almost.
A heavy banging on her wagon door, caused her to jolt up, consequently snaking her head on the wooden roof.
"Girly!" More banging. "I know you're in there! I followed you, and your little boyfriend." The banging started again.
Trixie almost paniced, but stopped herslef short. Panicing would only make things worse.
The wagon began shakeing back and forth, rocking violently. "Hey c'mon, open up!"
Now she could panic, and she did panic. Grabbing her jacket she tried to think of what to do, but the stallions yelling, and the wagon's rocking just made it imposible to focus. Stressed, and scared, her horn shined a bright blue light, and with a pop,
She was gone.
~x~x~
Tapper, had just finished putting his bar back in order, with tables, and chairs back in thier proper places. With a happy, but tired, sigh he went back over, and sat in one of the sturdier chairs.
"That damned boy, he just can't mins his own damned buisness." He groaned.
Then he helped loudly, when a scantily clad unicorn mare flashed into his bar in a bright light.
She looked around frantically, before seeing Tapper. "Oh thank Celestia you're here." She quickly crossed the room, and grabbed rappers wrist.
"I need you to take me to James."
~x~x~
James was awoken by a loud banging on his appartment door, followed by two hushed voices. Groaning, James rolled out of bed, and flopped onto the floor. Pushing himslef up, he yelled out to the incessant door knockers.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm up, I'm up." Glancing at his clock as he walked to the door.
'Six in the fucking morning?'
Annoyed, James yanked open the door, and was suprised to find Tapper, and Trixie standing in the decrepid hall.
"Tapper? And Trixie? What are you guys doing here?"
Tapper simply held up a hand. "Inside, we got things to talk bout'."
James sighed, a wonderful skill of his, and stepped aside to let them in. On a whim he closed, and locked the door behind them. Tapper, and Trixie sat down on his old couch, and James finaly got a good look at them.
Tapper looked like he was having a bad day in general, and Trixie, other than her jacket, she was wearing just her underwear, which she was trying to hide, with a blush painted on her muzzle. Being the gentleman he was, games tossed her a pair of sweats, he had grown out of. She quietly thanked him, as he sat down backwords in on a wooden chair.
The trio sat in silence for a moment before Tapper spoke up. "Boy, next time I tell you not to start a fight you should listen." He held up a hand when James tried to protest. "That damned stallion followed Ms. Lulamoon home. He tired to break down her door James, and he nearly did."
James looked at Trixie who was staring at the floor, unspilt tears in her eyes.
"Now what are you gonna do?" Tapper asked.
"Wait what!?" James sputtered. "Why do I have to deal with him, shouldn't you go to the guards or something?"
Trixie violently shook her head. "NO!" Realising her mistake she spoke softer this time. "No... Let's not go to the guards, I have a bad history with them." The two males just stared at her.
"Like really bad."
No one argued.
"Alright, so what do you two suppose, huh?" James featured at himself. "Ug I go start a fight, and he goes to the guards, I end up in prison." Then he pointed at Trixie. "And if you can't go to the guards, what does that leave us?"
Both said nothing, unripe Trixie suddenly had an idea. "What if we just move my wagon!"
Again blank stares.
She huffed. "Okay, so it won't be easy, but I can move it with my magic if someone distracts him, and once it's moveing, I'll just leave town!"
"And you'de just up an' move like that?" Tapper asked. "Cause' that seemed like more work than neccisary."
Trixie shruged. "I've been looking to move anyway, I just never had the motivation to do It."
James stood, pushing the chair back when he did. "Okay, then let's get this over with. I missing out on valuable sleep hours."
James isn't the nicest morning person is he?
With a plan in mind the three got ready, Tapper was already dressed to he waited by the door. James tried to put on a shirt but ended up yelping when he pulled at the cut on his shoulder, to which Trixie, to his embarrassment, had to pull the shirt over his head. Dressed, and ready the trio made to leave, only for James to shush them when he heard voices behind the door.
"It should right down this hall, Twitch told Fleetfoot, he saw that bitch going in here." The first voice said.
"Well, if Fleet wants her so bad why didn't he come get her!"
James tuned out the insuing argument, while he cursed under his breath.
"That dumbass from the bar sent his freinds here after you, which means we can't come back here either." He slammed a fist into the wall. "DAMN IT!"
Tapper shushed the man. "Get yer rears in gear!" He flung open the window, which led to a fire escape. "Move it or lose it kids."
Glancing at each other James, and Trixie both climbed out the window. Trixie when first, followed by James, then Tapper. The three could hear James door being busted down, as they climbed down onto the asphalt of the alleyway.
With silent agreement, the three made off for Trixie's trailer, hoping Fleetfoot, and his goons would be gone.
~x~x~
Ponies all over Manehattan, even some outside it knew two things. Manehatten is a noisy place, and steam from the sewers fills the air at night.
James made use of both.
When they arrived at Trixies wagon, this time with a solid plan. Trixie, and James would sneak past the, arguably, easily.destracted guards Fleetfoot had standing in the lot, while Tapper distracted them, by acting like a drunk old man.
Sneaking over behind a few of the boxes behind Trixies wagon, the two watched Tapper stagger around while the punks luaghed at him. Unfortunatly they were in the street, which was the same way the door to the wagon faced. To get caught, all they needed was a guard to look over his shoulder. But they waited, and when one of them was liaghing so hard he almost fell over, they snuk around the wagon, and Trixie quietly opens the door, thankful for the oiling she had given it a few days prior.
"Hurry up Trixie, we don't have time to be this sneaky." James commented while he moved plants, and pots away from the wagon's wheels.
Trixie just shushed him, and went inside. When the last of the pots were gone, James patted the side of the wagon, and waved at Tapper. Who started staggering off into the night. In truth he was just going back to the bar, where Trixie, and James would meet him later.
When the wagon started creeping foreword, James flim ed onto the portch-like extension infront of the door. It was about this time the guards noticed the noises, and tie ed around.
"Trixie! Let's move it!" He yelled.
The mare inside reacted, and the wagon suddenly shot foreward, both stallions jumping out of its path. James on the other hand, noticed the rapidly approaching buildings ahead of them, and yelled out.
"Turn right!"
Turning sharply the wagon lurched over, its two right wheels almost leaving the ground, as it rushed down the street. Again James was alarmed by the oncoming intersection.
"Left!" He yelled again.
Trixie obliged, and turned left on the intersection, and narrowly missed hitting a street lamp. The sound of a rapidly approaching carriage, made James sweat just a bit.
He groaned, in hi dsight this probably wasn't a good idea.
"Faster Trixie, they're following us!"
The wagon sped up once more, this time he had to direct them across the town, trying to avoide the following gang members.
"Left!"
They screached around another intersection, a d James had to shout again, when they almost hit a parked carriage. "Doge right!"
"Now left!" The gangs carriage made a horibble crunching noise as they rounded the corner. Most likley crashing into the parked carriage.
James laughed, and told trixie to slow down a bit. When the cart, or wagon, was back on its intednded route to Tapper's bar, Trixie stepped out onto the portch, her horn glowing faintly.
She smiled at James. "I usually steer from out here, but you made a pretty good navigator."
He just grunted, glad the hellish ride was over.
It wasn't five minutes later, when. Fire carriage sped past, and James recognised the direction it was heading in.
Tword his alpartment co
Trixie noticed to and looked to James. "He didn't."
"I think he did..."
~x~x~[sb]
They didn't have to meet Tapper at the bar, he was already standing outside the burning appartment complex, when Trixie's wagon rolled up.
James climbed down off the wagon, and looked at the ball of fire that had been his home for nearly six years.
"If I ever see that little shit again, I swear I'm gonna feed him his own cock!" James yelled, to which Tapper slaped the back of his bead.
"There's a lady here."
James just huffed, and sat on the concrete. Watching the flames eat away his life. "I'm fucked." He paused. "And homeless."
Trixies felt awful about it all, he had saved her twice now, once at the bar, and then with her wagon. And now he was being repaid with a burning home. It made her feel awful, and guilty. Tapper mearly shook his head, and muttered something about 'Fucking punks' before walking away. Presumably back to his own life.
Trixie Nast watched James, she had an idea, a way to help him. It was risqué, and not exactly the best idea, but it was all she had.
"James,... Why don't you stay with me?"
The human looked over his shoulder at her lime she had offered him a severed hand.
Trixie blushed and looked away. "Don't look at me like that! You helped me so I'm returning the favor."
"I thought you were leaving the city?" James asked.
Trixie stared at him. "And you wanna stay in this city?"
Touche.
"Fine, but at least tell me were your going, before I decide."
Trixie looked back at her wagon, and the old, faded sign painted on it.
It read: "The Great, and Powerful Trixie!"
"I think I'll go back to doing traveling shows." She said. "I used to be a magician."
James though about it, he though for a long time. Then a smoke crept onto his face.
"Shure, why not?" He stood up. "If you'll wait, I can get the last of my money out of the bank, and we can leave in the morning. Sound good?"
Trixie smiled a bit. "Yeah, sounds good."
That night she made sure to park the wagon on the safer side of town.
Next to a police station.
Under a streetlamp.
Author's Note
AN: The length, and format of this chapter will tbe the norm, for the rest of this fic. Please if you see a continuity error, point it out in a comment.
Gove me some feedback on how the story's going, comments fuel inspiration.
Thanks for reading!
INKthefallen.
Silly Man, Trix are for Kids
Chapter Three: The Man in the Coat (PT1)
Author's Note
Most of the first half of this chapter was rewritten by Guy Balkur. Give him your thanks! Second half will be out next week!
Chapter Three: The Man in the Coat (PT1)
Chapter Three
The wagon stood uncomfortably still, while the darkness of the night, ate everything in its way for Luna's art to make its show. Not far away from the protected carriage, lay prone on a building, was a dark figure. The shadow had his eyes cupped together as he looked at the unsuspected box with utmost interest. His black ski mask, hiding the features of who this mysterious person was.
A pony nearby seemed to be using his own set of binoculars to peek at the wagon as well; doing a poor job of being disclosed from the other spying creature. Annoyed, but rather amused, the figure removed a small but sturdy metallic cylinder. Moving around slowly on the ground, he fitted a dart that had the two letters, 'K.O.' labeled on it. He loaded the dart, before putting the nosey pony to sleep with a well calculated aim to the neck. The pony's snout, collided with the rough texture of the roof with a crumpling motion as his body fell limp to the affects of the narcotics, flowing through his veins. The remanding spy chuckled amusingly as he scoffed at the snoozing peeking Tom.
"Pssshh, Amateur. " The figure muttered, before noticing the opening of the carriage door. The figure hummed silently as he brought his focus back to the figure that stood outside. Alone.
~x~x~
James was having one hell of a night. With his home burning down and his life rolling over, were only stressed to the limits as the bed he was currently sleeping on was a foot too small.
"Damned tiny bed." He muttered.
Climbing out of the bed, he carefully suck past Trixie, who was snoring rather softly.His weight made the floor boards creek slightly as he tried in vain to exit the carriage. He was foot away from freedom when he heard a soft, but adorable squeak some from where Trixe lay. James turned around and saw her body form into a fettle position, obviously trying to comfort herself from a horrific nightmare. James sighed a bit, before grabbing the sheets that lay near her waist, and lifting them back over her shoulders. Trixie's face seemed to relax a bit as she felt his hand brush softly against her cheek. James, unknowingly, laid his hand against her right cheek, feeling for a rise in temperature. No signs of increased heat, relieved the small worry he had in the depth of his mind. With her sleeping snuggly again, James continued outside.
"Damn, forgot about the headaches." He grumbled, now worse off than before. Though his hands felt warmer.
He took the time to examine where he stood. The city this far north from where he usual lived, was a lot more quiet. Almost too quite for the likes of him. After what he had been through, it was unlikely somepony like Fleetfoot, would just give up on making him, and Trixie pay for his utter humiliation. Realizing he was freezing in the dark void, with nothing but pants on and little reason to us the untrained magic for warmth, he opened the carriage door. But As he turned around for one more look, he noticed a shadow standing up in the distance. The figure moved with the dark air, letting him know that he wasn't alone. He stared intensely, making out a human shape before hearing the thundering crash of a garbage can, and the scratching of a cat. He looked back at the spot, but the shadow had vanished. He shook his head, rationalizing it to be nothing but sleep deprived spooks . And maybe too much drinking.
~x~x~
James learned early that morning, that Trixie was an early riser. By six she was up and dressed, shaking the human out of his own fitful sleep.
"Come on, James wake up." She shook him again. "We have to go."
James grumbled something unintelligible, and rolled out of the small bunk, landing feet first on the wooden floor. Unprepared, Trixie had to step back to avoid being trampled. After she had stabilized herself on the ground, she lifted her hair out of her eyes , trying to straightened it again.
"I made some breakfast. That is if you are in the mood for eating." She said, shrugging. James wobbled some more before he sat back on the bed. He straightened his back, getting that great snap, crackling, pop feeling in his back. After he let out a large yawn, he nodded.
"Yeah, that sounds good." He smacked his lips some more before stretching his arms. "What'a we have'n?" He asked tiredly.
Trixie placed a tray on his lap, careful not to spill the dew dripping, fresh orange juice. The cooling juice glistened with mouth watering anticipation for the fatigued human. Next to it was two pieces of crust spreading toast, soaked slightly in the salted butter that made the center cushioned against your teeth.
"Sorry." Trixe said, as she sat on a small office looking chair inside the tiny cart. "No meat. This was the best I could do."
"It's great.' James smiled. "Better then nothing. And that's what I'm used to anyway. So don't worry too much about that."
"So did you sleep well Trixie?" James asked through a mouthful of toast.
The mare stiffened a bit, but relaxed somewhat, and said: "Y-yeah, I slept pretty well. Did you?"
James ignored the obvious lie, and instead continued the conversation. "Not too great actually, bed was a bit small, but I got over it."
Trixie hummed. "Yeah they aren't very big but I've gotten used to them."
The rest of the morning went on in silence, until Trixie began moving the wagon through the streets, this time from the seat above the door. Driving it like a carriage. James sat beside her, and eventually the ended up in the trafficked streets of Manehattan Square.
At this point, a whole new side of Trixie emerged. "Hurry it up!" she screamed.
"Oh, your that kind of driver." James said, A laugh bubbling in his throat.
Trixie just continued to fume, yelling ever few minuets, as they slowly left the city proper. Never once did they see the coated figure slink into the traffic jammed wagon, where he hid away.
James watched Trixie scream, and cuss the entire trip out of the city, she even taught him a few new pony-curses, he hadn't known before. Soon enough they left the city proper, and began to head west, in the direction of Trottingham, where Trixie planed to put on her first show in nearly a year.
~x~x~
As the sky began to darken, and the city was left long in there dust, James heard, for the fourth time, a loud bang from inside the wagon. Fed up, he asked Trixie to stop, and climbed down off the wooden structure. With a angry grunt he yanked open the door, while Trixie watched. When the door swung open, someone, or something tumbled out, landing with a solid thud onto the dirt.
The figure groaned, and started to sit up. "Oh jeeze, that smarts!"
The heavy foot, that landed on his chest probably hurt more.
"Who the hell are you?" James growled, while the cloaked man squirmed under his heel.
Trixie came to stand beside James, wearing a small frown. "Well, speak up."
Silly Man, Trix are for Kids
Chapter Three: The Man in the Coat (PT2)
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. 