A bad fan fiction

by Princess trixie

Rating: everyone
Tags: Alternate Universe, Comedy, Adventure
Length: 2557

All of you're fan fictions are actually real, and actually happened. Now Twilight finds herself somehow trapped in one.

It was the a normal morning and Twilight was doing just fine. That was until, it happened. She wakes up in a strange place, so similar and yet so different to her own. Not long after her arrival she discovered there is no way out and it's either play by the story or be eliminated all together.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-10-31 13:27:02 UTC

How It Started

Hello, my name is Twilight Sparkle. I'm the newest princess of Equestria along with element if magic. I have six friends: Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie and Spike.

If you're reading this that means you have been dragged into this as well. Pinkie will probably find this after a while so thank her for me. It might seem confusing right now but it will become some what clear in time. This book will become some sort of an entrance guide but mostly just somewhere to write and retell the past few weeks of my life, so I don't go completely insane.

I woke up unusually late (but that is to be excepted with the midnight study sessions), I went down stairs to find Spike preparing my breakfast despite it being the time I would have lunch. "Good afternoon, sleepy head!" He greeted in a cheerful manner, "you really should get to bed earlier. You're sleeping schedule is going to get messed up."

Spike is still a baby dragon so him doing something better than me normally makes him a bit cocky (even if it is just sleeping). I hope he can grow out of it but Rainbow Dash is living proof that you can still own that trait in you're late teens.

I rolled my eyes and sat down and our table, simultaneously levitating the blue berry pancakes spike had made for me.

"I thought you you would be on you're way to The Carousel boutique by now." I said, "didn't Rarity ask you to help with jem finding today?" My assistant sat on opposite me with his lunch, a turquoise saphire he had gotten on his last outing with Rarity.

While digging into his meal he replied, "I wanted to make sure I didn't have any jobs here. I am you're assistant first and for most!"

I waited a moment, thinking if I needed anything done. I have to get some more quills and those books from Canterlot should be at the post office now I thought. I guess I can pick them up myself!

Waving a hoof, I declined thankfully, "it's okay Spike, I can handle a few things on my own! All I have to do is close up shop before running a few errands!"

Spike reluctantly got up from the table, "if you insist Twilight but if you need anything just come and get me." I heard the wheels of his small cart against the hard floors of my new castle followed by a load bang of the crystal doors.

I eventually finished my tower of pancakes and put the plate in the sink. I have to admit, my kitchen is quite oddly placed in the castel. It's in between the court yard and my master library. Plus it's compleatly modern, with all the newest magic gadgets. Sertainly it's breaking the mold of the home (not to mention confusing me).

I was born and raised in Canterlot. Despite being the capital of Equestria, it is not really that advanced, at least in the technical area. That's more like Mane Hatton. Anyway, I have forgotten most of the things I have learned from there. It seemed like such a long time ago.

Soon enough I had gathered up my new saddle bags (my old ones had been replaced because they were unsuitable for my wings) and departed from the castle. Life in Ponyville had now calmed after the whole Tierk thing and the towns ponies had been treating like they had before my wings had even been achieved. I honestly liked it better like that. Being worshiped and treated like a goddess just made me feel uncomfortable; it just wasn't me!

I soon came to the Sofa and Quill store and trotted inside. I was quite cut off guard when I saw two of my best friends standing at the desk. It was Rarity, the only clothes designer in town, and Rainbow Dash, the fastest flyer in town.

"Oh, hello Twilight!" Rarity smiled and looked at my saddle bags then gasped, "Oh, you can go first if you want, we're not really in a rush."

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes, "Come on, Rarity! We have been waiting forever!" The white unicorn shot the Pegasus a stare and let me go through.

"So, why are you guys here anyway?" I asked curiously. Rainbow sighed and put her hoof to her forehead and let Rarity explain.

"I have been experimenting with this new kind of crystal on my outfits." she began, "Recently I have been talking with this photographer who lives in Mane Hatton and he wants to take some pictures of those outfits. The outfits were specially made for a pegasus and Fluttershy just did not want to get envolved in modelling after what happened last time. So, Dashie her was my last option! Just this morning I noticed that there was gem missing in one of the most vital spots and I badly needed another fainting couch and Rainbow Dash showed up just as I was leaving."

Dash grouned but then suddenly stood up and begged, "come on, Twi, you have got wings now. Switch witch me!"

"Rainbow Dash," Rarity cut in, "think of the hats!"

"This is ridiculous! I have Wounderbolts reserve training today and if I keep missing it, I'll get kicked out real soon!"

By the time their dispute was over the store clerk had returned and I asked for my quills. I received them and left the shop. I don't really know what happened to Dash. She probably stayed with Rarity and did the shoot, element of loyalty and all.

The second, and last, thing on my to-do list was to pick up the new books Princess Celestia had sent me. Well, not exactly new books. They were some the ones from the Canterlot library and the ones that I found especially interesting from the  Castel Of The Two Sisters.

Being an offical princess isn't that bad. I mean you don't have to wait in lines and you get everything you want in a snap of Discord's claw! Yes, I know how that sounds but I have to get some luxury sometimes! It's not a crime! On a related note, I got my mail right away!

Derpy, my former mail carrier, had sadly been demoted to just desk work and dealing angry custumers. Still, she wasn't that good at it. Her heart is too soft to argue with other ponies and paper work is not her special talent, so...

"Oh Twilight! Is that you?" Derpy said in her usual cheerful tone, "A stallion came in here earlier and he gave me a bunch of books. I'm guessing those are yours"

I nodded with a smile and the wall eyed pegasus dashed into the back and returned with another pony carrying  half of my books.

She blushed and looked at Feather May (her co-worker), "I hope you don't mind but I might have dropped some of them." I took hold of the books and put four of them in my saddle bags and held the rest with my telekinesis.

"It's okay!" I reassured her, "at least there all here."

I stepped out of the Post Office and into the warm air of the outside. However, there was something off. It might have been the sun or the ponies around me but there was just something. I suppose that it was sign. The ground became softer than usual and it felt as if the temperature went from ten to a hundred. I became light headed and my legs were unsteady. My magic failed and the books fell to the floor not long before I did myself.

Chapter 2

After what seemed like years I felt myself slipping back into consignees. my body found itself lying on a hard substance, the ground. What a nice way to wake up from what seemed like a pony napping! I could deduct that I was somewhere near the Everfree forest because of the wet grass tickling my cheeks.

Just the day before the incident there was a violent storm in the forest. Because of the mysterious ways of the Everfree none of the Pegasi in Ponyville could fight it from spreading. Thankfully it didn't get that far. sorry, I got a little off topic there!

Anyway, my ears started to work way before my eyes did so I was able to listen in on the conversation of two very familiar voices. They weren't too far away and seemed to be talking about myself.

"Oh, I'm so excited!" squealed a bubbly voice, "we already have our new Twilight!"

"Yeah, I'm happy as well..." said a voice that was a lot quitter and calm, "I just hope that we don't get too popular... I wonder what would happen if we got two Twilights!"

My eyes were starting to work and I opened them slightly only to be greeted by two bright blue eyes staring back at me! It felt as if my life was flashing before my eyes, though I was not in any danger, at least not yet. I hastily got up and stepped far away from the strange pony only to immediately notice that is actually Pinkie Pie. my zany, joyful and lovable friend.

I sighed with relief and put a hoof to my heart, "Pinkie, you scared me! Why am I here, what's going on?" Fluttershy, who was standing behind the pink party pony, rolled her eyes at my various questions.

"I forgot about this part..." Pinkie's hair flick lowered a bit and she glanced over to the pegasus, "do you mind taking this one? I mean I always do this and explaining it is the boring part..."

She gradually steped past Pinkie Pie and wrapped her leg around my neck and asked smoothly, "Twilight, can I ask something of you?" While she was leading me into the forest, I cought myself sweating a bit. I'm not exactly sure why I was at that point. Perhaps I was starting to get suspicious- too many unanswered questions for my taste.

I agreed with a nod. It was Fluttershy, how could I refuse? She was one of my best friends and the element of kindness. "Of course!"

"When we get to our destination, I want you to promise you won't scream shreak or panic. That would really just irritate me and I don't feel shutting your mouth force fully."

My eyes slowly shifted towards her and I saw that that she was completely serious. She can't be... She wouldn't... *What the buck is going on?!*** At that point, I was truly scared and I have faced Nightmare Moon, Discord and even bleeding Tierk but the pony who is scaring my is Fluttershy!

Despite my better judgement, I went along with this. Pinkie Pie bounced jubilantly behind us as we neared our destination. It seemed to be a normal bunch of bushes that you would see all over the Everfree, at least that was until Fluttershy pushed past some of the middel branches to reveal a small staircase leading underground. Carefully, she began to trot down the staircase only to be immediately followed by Pinkie.

I was left at the top of the stairs, staring into oblivion. I pondered my choices attentively while I looked left then right. Should I make a break for it? I woundered, there could be timber wolves down there, or even worse! But if Fluttershy can go down there with courage then why can't I?

I took a deep breath and put my front hoof on the first stair and continued to climb until I got to the bottom. Instead of finding a rabid pack of timber wolves feeding on the dead carcasses of my friends I found a quite quaint  room with a fine carpet and wood interior.

"Did Rarity help you with this?" I questioned politely.

A sudden panic shot into Pinkie's eyes and she lept from her seat and hid under the table that was placed in the middel of the room. "Rarity?! Where is she?! Follow up question, where are the nives?!"

Fluttershy tilted her head to see the pony in a better view and gave her a cold stare as if to say, "shut up." I helped Pinkie up from under the table and the pegasus placed her back on the sofa she was sitting on before, inviting me to do the same. I seated myself next to Pinkie as Fluttershy went into the next room to get what seemed like projector. She started to set it up and I could tell it would take a while.

I layed my head back on the top of the sofa, trying to figure out what was going on. I did not trust this situation what so ever and Pinkie's sudden breakdown was not helping. Why was she so scared when I mentioned Rarity? Why did Fluttershy ask me not to panic? And why were we in the Everfree forest?! Surely there could have been a better meeting place for this thing! One nicer and closer to my castel! My inner Canterlot pony was coming out deren all of this and I did not like it.

My head soon pressed against the wall and I noticed that this was also made of wood. "Is this mahogany?"

Pinkie nodded and smiled, "yeah! You sure do know your wood Twilight!"

While continuing to work, Fluttershy said, "you guys do know that sounds unbelievably wrong, right?"

The pink pony nodded once more only more vigorously this time, "yep, and I'm completely fine with that!" She stroked the wall and began to dribble, "mahaagoonnny...."

Turning away from the disturbing sight I directed my sights upon the pegasus. "Fluttershy, are you alright? I mean, you have been acting a bit... Mean today."

Glancing at me for a second, she replied, "well that's what happens when you're dragged into this crazy world without any warning..." I couldn't figure out the last bit because it was mostly just mumbles and grunts- though the first part was not much diffrent. She stood up and shook her head and walked over to the table where the remote was. She turned on the projector and it displayed two circles: one blue and one red.

She pointed to the blue one, "me and Pinkie call this universe Cannon. It is where me, you and everypony else comes from." She turned to me to see if I undertood so I gave her a slight nod to let her know I did. She then pointed to the red one, "this universe is called Fiction beacause it is a alternate universe to Cannon. We are all in Fiction at this point in time."

"You know about about alternate universes, don't you Twilight?" Inturuted Pinkie, "you read books all the time!"

"Actually I'm more into adventure and nonfiction..." I replied, embarrassed.

"As I was saying," continued Fluttershy, "we believe that all of were transported from Cannon to Fiction by some mysterious force beyond our power. The force has made it that we have to relive the same story over and over again until it decides we have to stop." A wicked smile spread across her face, "do you know what happens at the end of the story." I shrugged.

"You die."