The life of a Spriggan Fairy.

     I woke up to the sound of a cucco near my bedding. Yawning, I rise out of the straw and brushed myself off. Looking over, I see Kahlan sleeping in my hat that I had hung on a nail next to the barn's main door. I gently remove the hat from the nail and place the hat on my head, careful not to wake her up as it was very early and the sun was still not past the horizon yet. After ensuring that my little pixie was safe, I open the door to the barn and take a few steps out.

     As I walk out of the barn, I am greeted by a small cyan missile that nails me in the stomach. While doubling over, I grip the pony that ran into me like a vice. She lets out an adorable squeak when she realises what is happening. She squirms and tries with all her might to free herself, but my grip was like crystallite. A few more minutes pass and the pony sighs in defeat, just hanging limp in my arms. I release her and she falls over onto the grass with a yelp of surprise.

    "What was that for?" The rainbow maned pegasus demands.

    "Well, I only thought it was fair of me to hold onto you after you nearly destroyed my midsection." I retorted.

    "Sorry..." The mare says with a sheepish grin.

    "Nah it's fine, I've had worse. My name is John, what's your name?"

    "My name's Rainbow Dash, fastest flier in Equestria." She replies proudly.

    "Wait a second, weren't you at the hospital when I was there yesterday?" I inquire.

     Rainbow Dash just nods her head and swallows nervously. Was she scared of me? I mean, I could understand Applejack's reaction, I mean come on; I randomly showed up at her house and asked if i could spend the night at her farm. But this, I hadn't done anything to Rainbow Dash and she was nervous. Had word of my brutal decimation of that group of changelings spread like wildfire? Would every single one of these multicoloured equines fear me?

     My train of thought is derailed by a second pegasus that appears next to Dash. She had a yellow coat and a pink mane. She took one look at me and just stared. Dear Lord almighty, it seemed like she was gazing into my soul. To be honest, I was probably more afraid of this little pony, than she was of me. Only God knows why though.

    "H-hello," I stammered,"who might you be?"

     The pegasus lowered her eyes, and while I saw her mouth move, I didn't hear what she said.

    "Could you repeat that please, I didn't hear you." I asked in a soft, reassuring voice. Ok maybe I was wrong, maybe she is more afraid of me than I imagined. How fast had word of my little changeling encounter spread anyway?

    "F-f-fluttershy." She whispered as she began to shake.

    "Well, nice to meet you Fluttershy.  My name is John." I say, trying to sound like as gentle and warm as possible; hey if this works, maybe we could be on friendly terms.

    "What kind of creature are you? I've never seen anything like you before."

    "Technically I'm a human, but right now I'm in the form of my spriggian avatar from Alfheim online." I replied, trying to answer Fluttershy's question. "So what brings you two here?"

     Rainbow Dash opened her mouth to speak but was interrupted by a pink pony that bounced into existence. (personally I think she hopped out of the bucket next to the barn, but who knows for sure)

    "We all heard that you were holding the duel here at Applejack's farm because you needed to borrow her cuccos because you were going to cast a very powerful illusion spell on twilight that will make her think she doesn't have wings or magic and then you were going to stick her inside the fence and see how long she would remain there before she realized it was all an illusion, while sending the cuccos at her while she has to dodge them." The pink pony said, all of it in one breath. Dear gods, how is such a thing physically possible.

     'Its not, just learn to cope with it,' replied a strange otherworldly voice that seemed to be speaking to me inside my head. Thats Odd, I don't really remember having an AI.

     That aside, why did Applejack spill the beans on that? Or did that pink pony know more about it than she was letting on? Was she an omnipotent being that knew all things? Or was it just an odd coincidence that was

    'Again, don't try to understand Pinkie Pie, some people and ponies have tried and lost their sanity, just go with it; your life will be simpler and you will not have to worry about Pinkie breaking the fourth wall.

    "Ok , but what the hell do you mean by fourth wall? Are you the system admin, or are you more like an AI unit that is stuck in my head?

    'I guess you could consider me the author of your  actually I'm sitting here writing this story about you and these ponies, and  I was just trying to help you cope with Pinkie's ability to break the fourth wall. Crap, you didn't need to know any of that, ugh... look, just forget you ever heard me say any of this to you. I'll just make up another scenario that can explain to you why you shouldn't question Pinkie...'

     I found myself laying flat on the ground after a short while.

   "Are you ok?" Came Fluttershy's concerned voice.

    "Yeah, just feel like I got hit by a truck." I replied, staring at the three ponies in front of me. That said, I feel as if there is something I've forgotten...

    "Anyway, I need to set up everything for the duel, want to help?" I ask the trio, getting a few eager nods from Pinkie and Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy also nodded, a little less enthusiastic as the other two, but then again it was the thought that counted.

     The four of us made our way over to the cucco pen. The a few of the cuccos eyed me as we came closer. As we came to a stop in front of the pen, three cuccos literally flew at me. They landed, two on my shoulders and one on my hat, and just sat there. Pinkie and Rainbow Dash broke out into a fit of laughter. Fluttershy even cracked a smile as she saw how the birds just sat there using my shoulders, and my hat, as a perch.

   "Well, never thought I would end up as a perch, but at least I found the three super cuccos." I stated with a laugh.

   "What do you mean by super cucco?" Fluttershy asked with a look of confusion.

    "Well, if you look at the right wing, you'll see a grouping of three black spots three centimeters from the top of the wing. All super cuccos have this."

    "I never knew there were more than one kind of cucco." Fluttershy whispered.

    "Well, there are more than the normal and super cuccos. There are blue cuccos, golden cuccos, and even an evil cucco, but those are rare." I replied with a smile. I played to much Zelda back in the real world.

    "Well what we need to do now is get the cuccos over to the pen," I state cheerfully, "but be careful not to harm, anger, or generally do anything to tick off the cuccos."

    "What could a cucco possibly do us?" Rainbow Dash says with a laugh.

    "I hope you never find out." I reply ominously.

     The four of us (seven if you count my super cuccos) began to gather the rest of the normal cuccos. There were thirty-seven of these smart birds. Each of us tried to catch eight cuccos, Fluttershy deciding to catch the last one.

     Catching my eight cuccos, I quickly take them to the small fenced inclosure, careful not to do anything to provoke them. One of the super cuccos remained perched on the fence while the other two accompanied me back to the cucco coup. On the way back I heard the cry of a cucco ring out across the farm. I instantly hit he ground, scared for my life. I knew all too well what these birds were capable of. A rainbow streaked past me, followed by twenty-nine angry cuccos. Well, I guess Rainbow Dash does too.

     The cuccos chased Dash for a good ten minutes before we were able to herd them to the pen. Rainbow Dash had small cuts and bruises by then, but she was ok for the most part. What worried me most was how badly her pride had been hurt. While I may not know her very well, I could still see that while this experience may not have hurt her too badly physically, she was left with a mental scar. I honestly felt bad for asking for their help now.

    "Fluttershy, Pinkie; could you two take Rainbow Dash to the farm-house, I can handle it from here but Rainbow Dash will need some time to recover from her recent experience." I say, wondering if I should erase this from Dash's memory. It would be a mercy, but at the same time it would be risky. That said, the risks outweighs the benefits.

    "Okie dokie lokie." Pinkie replied  cheerfully, bouncing up and down in place. She then began bouncing over to where Dash lay shivering in the dirt.

    Fluttershy just nodded and went with Pinkie. She seemed too stunned to say anything after seeing her friend attacked by the cuccos.

    As soon as the three ponies were gone I began to set up a warp point. The process, while long and absolutely boring as pking noobs, was quite easy. After setting up the warp point, I tested it. The warp worked but left me covered in black dust, and it hurt quite a bit.

    "Well, I feel like I came out of a furnace, but at least I know what went wrong." I mumble to myself, readjusting the angles on the symbols in the circle.

     The warp point set, I turn my undivided attention to the forty cuccos in the pen. I let a grin fill my face as I look over the birds that will play a critical role in the events for today. While I knew that Princess Twilight would not likely use combat magic, I wanted my illusion to work perfectly. I'd play around with her for a little while, transforming things like a tree into an Iron Knuckle, or a squirrel into a warg hound. Who knows, maybe I could change the battlefields after a certain point, like from the farm here to the castle up there on the mountain. Thanks to Twilight my odds of winning were ensured. A malicious laugh escaped my mouth, the force of it shaking the trees nearest me. All the cuccos looked back at me, an expression of nervousness showing in their eyes.

     Suddenly a door flew open and an older looking mare stepped out. She looked over at me and narrowed her eyes.

    "Do ya mind, some of us are still tryin' ta sleep." She hollered across the farm.

    "Sorry ma'am" I called back.

     After that, the mare went back inside, leaving me to watch the sun rise over the hills.