Sexy Ponidius

by Tythen

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Random, Adventure, Crossover
Length: 7366

A mysterious contractor hired 16 ponies from their casual jobs to join a 'help' agency. For all the big jobs the 16 ponies get, things get out of hand. Based on the arcade game Sexy Parodius!

The Mane 6, Background 6, Shining Armor, Princess Cadence, Flash Sentry and Caramel decided to put themselves in the ordinary workforce in order to contribute to Equestria. However, a mysterious pony (or ponies?) had started a small 'help' agency and hired the 16 ponies and Spike as an accountant secretary. The agency's motto? To find treasure, own the biggest mansions, and let kindness, generosity and the process of helping others dominate the world! However, do the mysterious ponies have their own agenda of desires?

This small story is based on the Konami shooting game Sexy Parodius.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2015-06-06 08:41:12 UTC

Introduction: A new job? The mysterious contractor!

In order for a land or country to be very prosperous, it must have a willing and dilligent workforce who would work and toil to overcome any debts and repayments the land has. This path also goes for the land of Equestria. Here, the ponies are hard working with whatever occupation they have, doctors, fruit farmers like Applejack, the list is endless. 2 princesses, the Captain and his trusty lieutenant decided to join 12 other ponies to help out with the workforce and of course, work to earn their own money. However, the 16 ponies normal day of work is about to change when a mysterious pony made negotiations.

"Okay Flash!" Shining called as he finished forming a chain of parcels. "This one's good to go!"

"Roger." Flash saluted as he grabbed the chain of parcels and flew them to its destination.

"Phew!" Shining sighed as he continued making another chain of parcels. "Who knew this parcel delivery work would be hard!"

"I'm back sir." Flash reported

"That was fast." Shining noted "are you sure you've delivered them to the right place?"

"Unless there is some miscalculation with the coordinates of where the parcels go" Flash replied showing Shining a fully ticked list "affirmative."

"And that's why you're my trusty lieutenant!" Shining chuckled "but you really need to stop with this hardcore soldier personality."

"Negative sir." Flash shook his head.

"Hey." Shining noted as he pulled a small note off Flash. "What's this?"

"That's odd... I don't remember getting a note stuck on to me." Flash replied

"Hmm..." Shining read the note " 'Mr Armor and Mr Sentry, I have a special job for you that requires your talents. Please come to the Parodius bureau. Here are the locations...' "

"Sir." Flash pointed out "the location given on this note is quite close to one of the previous delivery locations."

"Well then." Shining decided "when we finish our shift, why don't we go there?"

"You're the boss sir." Flash complied

"Ahem..." Shining gestured

"Alright sir. I suppose 'I' can also use a little bit of adventure in my solider life." Flash corrected

"That's the spirit!"

In another area, Derpy and the Doctor were busy doing woodwork.

"Be careful with that saw Derpy." The Doctor warned as he hammered some nails into some pieces of wood.

"Okay then!" Derpy thanked and started cutting. After a few seconds, Derpy started to complain. "Hey Doctor..."

"Yes dear?"

"The part I'm trying to cut isn't splitting into half."

"Hmm... Maybe you need to apply more force." The Doctor advised "let me try." As the Doctor sunk the saw into the lined area of the wood , the long wood was immediately split up into equal pieces. That is, every part of the wood but the lined area.

"Well..." The Doctor whistled "this is a bit of a predicament."

"I swore I cut the lined part!" Derpy defended.

"We all know. Yet you didn't for some reason." The Doctor continued "we shall never know."

"Hey Doctor." Derpy pointed out "there's something on your hammer."

"Oh?" The Doctor looked at the hammer. Indeed, there was a note attached to it. The Doctor picked it up and read

"Dear Doctor of Gallopferey and his wonderful grey assistant. It is my biggest honour to enlist your aid for my agency. You will find the Parodius Bureau here..." And a location was pointed out.

"Hmm..." Derpy wondered "should we go there Doc?"

"I wonder... How did he know my identity?" The Doctor wondered "this seems very suspicious to me..."

"Doctor?"

"But if you want to go Derpy, then let's go!" The Doctor laughed

"Aww... You're so sweet." Derpy nuzzled

"You're just my assistant, and we'll leave it there." The Doctor blushed "to the Tardis!"

"Hello everypony!" Twilight waved "and thanks for coming to watch us perform. I'm your Princess of friendship and showmare, Twilight Sparkle!"

"And I'm her partner showmare and the Princess of Love, Princess Cadence!" Cadence finished, replied by an uproar of applause.

"Today, we will be singing a duet." Twilight explained "it is called 'Bad Apple!!!' By Alstroemeria records."

"It's originally from Neighpon for those who don't know the artist." Cadence added "and it was originally in Neighponese. However, we will be singing a translated version."

"Are you ready everypony?" Twilight asked and was answered with cheers.

"I don't think I can hear you properly. Are you ready?" Cadence repeated with even louder cheers.

"Let's do this." The alicorns said and the music started. The moment Twilight opened her mouth to sing the song, everypony in the crowd was swept off their feet and swayed by the alluring tune of the purple pony. The reaction was mutual when Cadence started singing too.

At the end of the performance, the two alicorns waved goodbye to their audience and relaxed in the dressing room.

"Man! That performance was awesome!" Twilight exclaimed

"Indeed." Cadence agreed "this showmare business is pretty successful and interesting." Until Twilight changed the subject as she saw something different.

"Umm Cadence..." Twilight asked holding up a small note. "Is this yours?"

"No... But I don't remember that being there either." Cadence shook her head "Maybe it's a letter? Who's it addressed to?"

"From the looks of it." Twilight read the note "us! 'Dear Princess Twilight and Cadence. Your showmare talents are amazing and sexy...' "

"Sexy!?!?" Cadence gasped "why would this pony even use that word?"

" 'But I believe you will do better in joining my agency of Parodius Inc. Here are the locations...' "

"Do you feel like doing something else?" Twilight asked

"Why not?" Cadence chuckled "but... I've got a bad feeling about this..."

"Hello everyone! And welcome to today's weather forecast!" Lyra announced on a loudspeaker.

"From the pegasi meteorology bureau, Ponyville will be Sunny all day with temperatures 25 degrees Celsius..." Bon Bon announced "and Cloudsdale..."

"Zzz..." Lyra snored. Her new job as the weather announcers for the peagsi was too boring for the lyre player to even open an eyelid.

"...And that's it for today's weather! Hope you have a pleasant day!" Bon Bon concluded

"... Is it over?" Lyra woke up

"You idiot. I had to take over your line... Again!" Bon Bon snapped

"Can you at least give me more lines?" Lyra pleaded

"Of course not! You always mess the locations up!"

"Dang it!!! This type of job isn't for me!" Lyra whined, but stopped as a note landed on her nose.

"Bon Bon?" Lyra asked

"I did not put that there." Bon Bon shook her head "what does it say?"

" 'Congratulations Lyra and Bon Bon!!! You have been invited for a special job! Come to the Parodius Bureau for more information!' "

"Hey! This thing's directed to us!" Lyra gasped

"But..." Bon Bon started

"Enough with this job! I'm going, and you're coming with me!" Lyra interrupted

"Errrgh..." Caramel winced as he carried a small load of furniture on his back.

"Come on Caramel! You can carry much more!" Applejack encouraged

"Too... Heavy..." Caramel gasped

"A few more centimeters!"

"Guh..." Caramel sighed with relief as he put the furniture down.

"My oh my..." Applejack sighed "yer a stallion. Why do you carry like a mare?"

"I'm sorry Applejack, I'm not as strong as you are." Caramel apologised

"Don't worry, I think that's it for the day." Applejack assured. "Tell you the truth, this is certainly something different from the farm."

"Um... Applejack? I think there's something on your hat." Caramel pointed out.

"Wha?" Applejack pulled down her stetson and looked at the note. " 'To Equestria's most strongest and weakest pony. Have I the job for you.' Dang, that's a big compliment for telling me that ah'm the strongest."

"And he's calling me weak..." Caramel cringed

"Don't let that get you down. How bout we pay a visit to this Parodius bureau?" Applejack asked

Octavia trotted through the streets of Ponyville,  tossing newspapers to every doorstep of a pony.

"Ahh... That's one street down." Octavia grinned "Now I've got a few--" Her sense of thinking was interrupted when hundreds of newspapers carried by... Soundwaves started flying over her.

"Wha? So many Newspapers!" Octavia gasped as she looked to the sky. "And that music? Oh no... Vinyl." With a sense of anger, she angrily stomped off to the source of the sound, seeing the unicorn tossing news papers in front of the bass speakers, allowing the vibrations to carry them in the air.

"Hey Octy!" Vinyl greeted "check it out! Great way to deliver newspapers!"

"Vinyl! Turn it off!" Octavia ordered right away

"What?"

"TURN... IT... OFF!!!" Octavia yelled and getting the message, Vinyl turned off the music.

"Vinyl!" Octavia scolded "you know you have to use the standard original way of delivering newspapers."

"But Octy, it's so long and tiring!"

"That's what being a papermare is about! Besides, it may attract dogs... Like that past time..."

"I remember!" Vinyl chuckled "10 dogs were chasing us all around Ponyville!"

"Dogs are only supposed to chase Mailmares! Not papermares! Their teeth would have sunk into my flesh if we didn't make it out in time! Just don't use sound waves to carry newspapers. In fact, it doesn't scientifically make sense."

"This is a world of magic Octy." Vinyl reminded

"Anyway" Octavia changed "there seems to be a note on one of your speakers." And pulled it off.

"What does it say?" Vinyl asked.

"It's a job offer... From Parodius Inc." Octavia finished "never heard of them."

"Sounds musical! Want to try our luck?" Vinyl asked

"You can try your luck. I'm staying here." Octavia replied

"Doing boring paper runs? I imagine that you can do it with rhythm, but it may be very weird."

"Thanks for giving me that thought." Octavia growled "because it convinced me to go with you!"

"Then let's go!" Vinyl laughed.

Meanwhile, Pinkie and Rarity had... Peculiar jobs, it involves stacking certain types of energy balls together in order to power up some machine that makes materials.

"Right... This goes there, and that goes there..." Rarity was busy piling rows of different colours on top of each other in the most colourful and stylish way possible.

"No Rarity!" Pinkie sighed "that's not how you do it!" Pinkie on the other hand, was combining 3-4 energy balls of the same colour in different patterns, which seem to make them disappear. "You need to get rid of them! That creates energy to make this machine work!"

"What? I refuse to believe that!" Rarity retorted and in her rebuke, slammed an energy ball down which in turn, started to create a combo of chained colours of energy balls. Rarity watch as her artful masterpiece disappeared right before her eyes, in which nothing was left.

"A 12-chain combo!" Pinkie applauded "now that's how you do it!"

"M-My masterpiece..." Rarity started until the foreman came in, beaming wildly.

"I saw that with my own eyes! Nice work with that chain reaction Ms Rarity! This astounding increase of energy for our business will be a astounding increase for your paycheck!"

"See? I told you that matching colours together is how you do your job!" Pinkie added

"Well done to both of you, feel free to take a month's vacation. By the way, some hooded pony told me to give this both to you. I'm going to be heading off to one of the mines." The foreman noted, passing a note to Pinkie before leaving.

"Hmm... Parodius Inc?" Rarity wondered as she looked at the note.

" 'Dear Rarity and Pinkie Pie!' Do you want lots of money to get better fashion materials and hold even bigger parties? Cause we've got the job for you!' " Pinkie Pie read "ooh! Sounds exciting!"

"I don't know Pinkie..." Rarity replied "but this our first job here and we've been already been given vacation time so... I want to do more. I guess I can't say no."

"Yay!!!" Pinkie cheered

"Ughh... So tiring!" Rainbow moaned as she placed rows of rice saplings in a paddy field. "Hey Fluttershy! I think this is your job!"

"I-I know that." Fluttershy replied as she plowed the ground with a hoe "but we were selected to do these things!"

"Does that farmer pony know that you're the green thumb around here?" Rainbow asked

"I wanted to take care of the farm animals instead!" Fluttershy complained "didn't you know that already!?"

"My bad." Rainbow sighed and continued on planting rice saplings. As Fluttershy continued plowing the fields, she stepped on something that didn't feel like dirt, and found a strange looking note directed to her and Rainbow.

"Hey Rainbow..." Fluttershy called "somepony requires our attention..."

"Really?" Rainbow approached "let me see... A job for us!? I accept! Anything to get away from this farm!"

"But Rainbow... We need to tell..."

"He can deal with it himself! We're going to Parodius Inc. now!" Rainbow cried and dragged Fluttershy her towards the exit.

Prologue: The contractors revealed! The vision of Parodius Inc!

Shining and Flash approached on what looked to be a one story office building with an extended hanging sign that says Parodius Bureau.

"Parodius Inc. huh?" Shining asked "looks promising..."

"Is there a problem Captain?" Flash asked

"Nah... I'm just worried about Cadence's and Twiliy's job. Are you fully aware what a 'showmare' is?"

"Affirmative Captain. I think the Princesses think that it's only based on their performing or dancing for stage entertainment. However, the real truth is that showmares intend to showcase their own "physical" attributes. That involves stripping, revealing clothing, pole dancing or even to the point of toplessness and nudity."

"Eee..." Shining cringed

"Captain, we don't wear clothes." Flash calmed "that's why this showmare business isn't that popular."

"I know that, but I don't want my wife or sister to go down the path of no return. It's going to bring shame to the Royal Family and our parents, even all of Equestria!"

"A better term to describe the princesses would be Vedettes. However, the 'showmare' or 'promotional model' is the preferred business term."

"I rather them be promotional models than showmares." Shining sighed

"You can discuss matters with them after we find out what Parodius is."

"You're not coming along as my wingstallion?"

"Captain, I am a royal guard. I don't think supporting my Captain with his personal family matters is a good plan."

"But..."

"Fine, but I shall say nothing." Flash nodded

"Shining?" A familiar voice called. Shining turned around to see his wife and sister right behind them.

"P-Princess!!!!" Shining cried out.

"Speak of Tirek..." Flash chuckled

"What's wrong dear?" Cadence asked "you seem pretty flustered, and calling your siblings by their title? This isn't like you at all!"

"Flash" Twilight grumbled "what happened?"

"..."

"Silent as ever, I guess it's classified to the royal guard only." Twilight sighed

"However, may we ask of your presence?" Flash started "for the Captain and I had received a note for discussion of a new job."

"Really? Same with us."

"Hello Twilight!" Derpy greeted as she exited from a blue police box.

"Derpy! Don't greet the princesses like that!" The Doctor followed

"Doctor Whooves and Miss Derpy. Pleasure to make your acquaintance." Flash bowed

"Did you get a note too?" Cadence asked

"Yes madam!" Derpy saluted "telling us to go to Parodius Inc!"

"Then..." Shining calmed "that's 6 of us... How many more ponies are being invited to join?"

"Maybe you can ask those 10 other ponies coming along." Flash pointed to an approaching group, which was made out of Lyra, Bonbon, Applejack, Caramel, Vinyl, Octavia, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, Rainbow and Fluttershy.

"Oh my... Everpony we know!?" Twilight gasped

"That seems to be the case Twilight!" Pinkie greeted "and hello to all of you too!"

"Seems that this contractor has hired 16 ponies in total." Flash concluded

"I'm pretty sure we can all count!" Rainbow Dash laughed. As the 16 ponies were busily chatting, the entrance of the building opened revealing 2 familiar looking unicorns, causing everyone to gasped.

"Now look at what we've got here brother of mine! It appears to be the ponies that we've invited." Flim started

"Indeed brother! They must be willing to hear about our job offer!" Flam replied

"You guys again!?" Twilight cried

"What are you singers up to now?" Applejack threatened

"Nothing at all Miss Apple!" Flim cheerfully answered "I believe that the past is now the past. And we are off to a fresh new start!"

"But to have a fresh new start," Flim continued "we need the help from all of you."

"Are you sure you're not pulling any tricks on us?" Rainbow replied

"Not at all dear!" Flim nodded "this is an apology for our past actions."

"Please forgive us!" Flam added "our job for you can provide plenty of bits!"

"I don't trust them..." Rainbow whispered

"We'll see about that..." Twilight replied then turned to the brothers "in that case... What is your job all about?"

"Our job..." The brothers introduced in unison "is to be the workers for our company, Parodius Inc.!"

"That is the most obvious." Shining replied "but what is it about?"

"I'm glad you said that!" Flim replied "Parodius Inc. Is an agency that will be devoted to helping and solving the problems of clients!"

"One-time job offers will be posted on this bulletin board!" Flam pointed "here, workers will be able to take jobs and complete them in return for payment!"

"But it's not just that!" Flim continued "there are some jobs that are very big! That is where clients will immediately come to the administration desk to report something going on, and once we've approved of the job, it involves all of you to go on an adventure in return for lots of money! Isn't that interesting?"

"All money gained from jobs will be stored in the coffers of Parodius inc. After a certain amount of days, we will distribute your payment depending on your performance!" Flamm concluded "our secretary here will deal with that." And introduced the young baby dragon.

"Spike!" Twilight yelped "you're in this too?"

"Well, the brothers said that there was money and bits to be earned." Spike explained "I've been given a free abacus just for signing up! I really like this thing, I can calculate so much stuff!"

"Wait..." Rarity paused "Spike gets a job related item when he joined as a secretary. In that case..."

"What do we get?" Octavia finished

"I'm glad you said that too!" Flam answered "each one of you will receive a special designated item each! However, it will only be presented to you if you join."

The 16 ponies got into a huddled circle

"You know" Caramel started "I really don't know why I'm here in the first place."

"That's because I dragged you along Car!" Applejack reminded

"Let's not stray off the topic. About that job... It doesn't sound that bad." Vinyl added

"But we know these guys, and they caused quite some trouble." Fluttershy reasoned

"Twice..." Rarity added

"But..." Flash countered "they're merchants. They are always like this. It's all about the bits."

"They did have a few interesting records about their business. With machines, tonics, singing and all." Shining added

"Whatever they did, they didn't really break the law." Cadence replied

"But..." Rainbow tried to reason

"Honestly" Pinkie sighed "I really wanted to do something fun, now that Rarity and I have been given vacation."

"I can agree with that." Lyra nodded

"I... Guess it doesn't hurt." Octavia agreed "newspaper jobs are pretty boring."

"I want in!" Derpy whispered

"Due to Derpy's woodworking skills, I think I'll keep an eye on her." The Doctor sighed

"Honestly, I think an adventure is something we need." Bon Bon conluded

"I guess... All in favor of our decision?" Twilight asked. Only to realise that the brothers also joined in the circle

"So" the brothers chorused "what do you say?"

The 16 ponies looked at each other and Twilight stepped forward and said "We don't have anything else to do. So deal!"

"Wonderful!" The brothers cheered "in that case, let us show you your specific benefits of working with us!"

"Specific benefits?" Twilight asked

"Each of you will receive special equipment to carry out your jobs if necessary. All-purpose tools If I need to mention!" Flim explained

"First up. Shining Armor and Flash Sentry!" Flam announced and the Captain and Lieutenant stepped forward.

"As a worker of Parodius Inc, you will be given this!" Flim presented two magic rifles. A blue-white rifle for Shining and a red-white rifle for Flash.

"N-No way!" Shining gasped "this is--"

"The Vic Viper" Flash finished "a one-of-a-kind magic weapon that was most treasured by the legendary warriors of old."

"And yours..." Shining started

"Is the Lord British." Flash answered "another one-of-a-kind magic weapon, also most treasured by the legendary warriors of old. Legend has it that the Vic Viper and the Lord British were always brought to battle and war together, never separated and never alone. Of course, these weapons were lost and split apart from each other a long time ago... Until now."

"How did you get these?" Shining asked "I thought they had been lost to the wilderness or bought by rich collectors for display!"

"Remember captain." Flash reminded "they are merchants, they can collect and sell any sort of items. From common trinkets to legendary treasures."

"Indeed!" Flam answered "the legacy of the 2 magic rifles are to be upheld for years to come, born to do battle!"

"Well then... Thanks!" Shining replied

"Vinyl, Octavia, you two will have this!" Flim continued and gave out a Rock-hopper Penguin Plushie to each. Both seemed to be wearing a bulletproof vest, while Vinyl's was a green in colour with a white belly as Octavia was Blue with a white belly, but was also wearing an eye patch."

"Aww! They look cute!" Vinyl blushed

"Although I appreciate the generous gift." Octavia replied "how will they help our job?"

"Don't be mistaken! These are no ordinary plushies, they have special magic powers built inside them!" Flam noted "these toys are concealed weapons that are used by the secret service. The green one is called Ivan and the blue one is called Toby!"

"Oh wow..." Octavia muttered as she looked at the serious face of Toby. "Despite the eye patch and bulletproof vest, he still looks rather innocent. Who knew this thing could be a weapon of war?"

"Twilight and Cadence, I give you..." Flim presented "Torpedo Rockets with shark-like faces on them!"

"What?" Twilight replied with discontent "that's it? My BBBFF and Flash get legendary weapons, Vinyl and Octavia get secret gadget weapons and what do we get? Rockets?"

"These rockets can fly faster than the wonderbolts, and can channel and enhance your magic with their own!"

"Really? Do you know the origin of these rockets?" Cadence asked

"Normally, these rockets are invented and developed by bunnies. And so, the magic from the rockets are all bunny related! You can expect it to have rabbit drones or carrot missiles!"

"WHAT!?" Twilight yelled "that's impossible!"

"It's very possible!" Flim replied "the bunnies designed it for use by special showmares, like you two!"

"Uh..." Shining started

"Twilight, the blue-stripe rocket is called Hikaru, and it will be yours. Cadence, yours is the red-stripe rocket, called Akane." As the Princesses checked out their rockets, they were somewhat disappointed, but very interested.

"Wow, I can feel a lot of interesting magic hidden in this rocket." Cadence examined.

"I still feel like we've got the short stick..." Twilight grumbled

"Now. Lyra and Bon Bon, Have I got the best weapons specifically for you!" Flim replied "Ocean Sunfish!" And threw goofy-looking fish at the two ponies.

"Wha!?" Bonbon gulped as a pink Sunfish landed on her head with its mouth wide open, attempting to eat her up.

"Hey! These things look cute!" Lyra giggled as she mimicked the blue Sunfish's head movements.

"These ocean sunfish are able to breathe and fly in the air!" Flam explained "they also have feelings and emotions too! The blue one is a male called Mambo, and the Pink one is a female called Samba!"

"Feelings and emotions!?" Bon Bon yelped after yanking Samba off, "more like the feeling of eating any living thing!"

"Don't worry." Flim laughed "the fish will get used to you later. Did you know it can fire bubbles as it's main projectile?"

"Oh really? That's very interesting for a fish weapon!" Bon Bon replied sarcastically "what else can it do? Fire different types of lasers?" Samba smiled.

"What's this?" Bon Bon raised as she looked at the smiling Samba "you really think you can fire lasers? Keep on dreaming little one, cause you're just a fish!"

"Anyway" Flim continued "Miss Derpy and Doctor Whooves, you will be receiving these." Flim replied as passed to the 2 ponies a halo each.

"Halos? We're not dead yet." The Doctor replied

"Not just any old halo, these Halos are gifts from the high and heavenly pony saints!"

"The pony saints?" Twilight asked "I've heard that they watch over the Princess and answer the prayers of all of Ponyville, though their existence is debated. But even so, there are many of them. Who?"

"Whoever wears the halo on top of their foreheads will be endowed with either the mighty powers of Michael and Gabriel! As they are the ones who presented this gift!"

"But they aren't gold or glowing." Derpy pointed "one's pink and the other's green!"

"That is to show who gave this gift." Flam explained "the pink halo is the gift of Michael, while the green halo is the gift of Gabriel. I present to you Derpy, the gift of Michael. And Doctor, the gift of Gabriel will be passed on to you."

"You know. I really appreciate your present." The Doctor replied as he accepted the halo "but I really don't think you should treat a sacred gift as an item for sale."

"And that's why we give this to you in order to preserve and treasure this special gift for the nation of Equestria. No strings attached!" Flam winked

"Now Applejack and Caramel" Flim instructed "you will have these two giant paper planes. They are known as Koitsu and Aitsu."

"Aww..." Caramel moaned as he looked at his gift, apart from the special name of Aitsu and how large it is, it was just another boring paper plane. "Can't we get something better?"

"You know Car." Applejack nudged "I was actually plannin to get some of my family to help, and Koitsu and Aitsu looks big enough to hold for 6! As you're a friend of mine, ah'm sure the family would love to help you out."

"Really? Thanks!" Caramel smiled "but what will we do for weapons?"

"The family's got a... whole lot of unwanted junk. Especially mine." Applejack chuckled "ah think there's better use for them now."

"Pinkie Pie, Rarity." Flim replied "I'm afraid that we have to give you this normal hoverboard , for working with Parodius. " And presented a blue and pink hoverboard.

"WHAT!?!?!?" Rarity cried

"Actually, a hoverboard sounds fun. But no fair!" Pinkie cried

"However!" Flam reasoned "the reason why is that you have the creativity and power to copy about anything! With that creative mindset, you can easily copy the weapons and abilities of your co-workers and their weapons while using this hoverboard as a base! It's only used for flying anyway."

"Really? Stop pulling my leg." Pinkie tested "I bet they're hard to perform."

"Not at all Miss Pinkie!" Flam continued "using your skills and the hoverboard as a base material, you should be able to copy the Koitsu and Aitsu Paper planes, the powers of Michael and Gabriel... And this!" He presented a blueprint of a magic vehicle. "This is the Thunder Cross! A special magic weapon that is well known for it's famous Boomerang Shot! It would be advisable to study the blueprint so you can build it by heart."

"Well..." Rarity examined the blueprint of the Thunder Cross, then looked at Applejack and Derpy's gift. "I'm very flattered by your words, and I am fond of my creativity skills. I'm not familiar when dealing with hard materials, but it shouldn't be hard once I get some practice."

"Hey Rarity! Look! I did it!" Pinkie Pie cheered as she jumped on a blue floating structure greatly resembling the Thunder Cross.

"That's incredibly fast Pinkie!" Rarity complimented "but then again, you're Pinkie Pie."

"Finally, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy!" Flim announced "you two get special magic weapons, just like Shining and Flash! However, the existence of these weapons are kept in secret, as they contain forbidden power." And presented a red magic rifle that looks similar to this.

"No way... 'black'  weapons?" That's so exciting!!!" Rainbow Dash squealed "I thought they were only rumors! Now I'm actually holding one!"

"I thought they were rumors too!" Twilight exclaimed "do you know how much trouble you'll be in if you're carrying around these weapons of destruction?"

"It only depends on the one who wields the weapon." Flam replied "it may be used for evil or for good, and we're sure that the Shooting Star will be in the right hands!"

"You bet Twilight!" Rainbow cheered "I'll take extra care of this!"

"And Fluttershy?" Flim replied "you get the Black Viper. This weapon is the shadow-like existence of Vic Viper. It's said that the Vic Viper is invincible because of this." And handed Fluttershy a weapon similar to Vic Viper, only that it was just white in colour, lighter, and it's barrel outline had deadly-like curves (similar to the Black Viper).

"Oh my..." Fluttershy gulped "I've never held a weapon, let alone a 'black' magic rifle!"

"Be assured, Rainbow and Fluttershy" Flash replied "that you will receive training on how to handle these weapons, before going out on jobs."

"O-Okay then."

"However" Flash noted "I am quite concerned for your safety. Both of you are dealing with 'black' weapons. Illegal weapons that rival the legendary power of Vic and British."

"If Twily trusts them, I trust them too." Shining replied "they saved the relationship between Cadence and me, as well as all of Equestria. I will allow the pegasi Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy authorization to operate the black weapons."

"I will also give my authorization." Twilight added

"And mine too." Cadence piped up "now the aunties can't do anything about it!"

"Well... Now that your job applications are accepted and settled, it is time." Flim stated

"For what?" Twilight asked

"The oath and vision of Parodius Inc!" Flam exclaimed

"Parodius Inc." Flim read "is a agency that will be devoted to helping anypony in need, whether the cause is great or not."

"With the gratitude and money from our clients, we will build up a vast treasure for each and every one of us! We can use our riches to build our own biggest mansions, and we can dominate all of Equestria through the longest chain of helping one another!" Flam finished then the brothers spoke together "Kindness! Generosity! That is the motto of Parodius Inc!" No response came from the 16 ponies

"What? No applause?" Flam asked "that's disappointing..."

"It's a bit exaggerating..." Rarity started

" 'Dominating all of Equestria' sounds like treason." Flash noted

"I think we all agree that the motto's a bit farfetched." Twilight concluded "but, it does contain some good works and values!"

"Well... Shall we end this with a hurrah then?" Flim asked

"why not?" Rainbow replied.

"Hurrah!" Everypony yelled, including Spike. Thus, Parodius Inc. is now open for business.

Settling in and being legitimately hired for Parodius Inc was busy with paperwork but completed before the end of the day. The next day dawned and the 16 ponies were ready to start their new job as hired helpers of Parodius Inc. Everypony had received a lot of new things that the brothers made. For example, two different ring-bounded, help directory books (one blue and one red), each listing 8 ponies and how and where to contact the specified pony.

"Well..." Rarity exclaimed as she examined the 2 pony help directory books "these directory books are quite well done! All the pages are bookmarked by cutie marks to show the page of that pony." Spotting the bookmark of three diamonds on the red book, Rarity flipped to the mark's page, revealing her mug shot and the details of her abilities and skills.

"Don't I simply look marvellous?" Rarity sighed with pleasure, until her train of thought was interrupted by the numerous sounds of activity. "Oh great... They're at it again."

"Hmm..." Shining studied the history and the instructions of the Vic Viper from a book borrowed from Twilight's castle. "The Vic Viper contains all types of different projectiles. Able to launch magic missile bombs that can apparently 'walk' in its forward direction with its two legs until it hits an obstacle, where it will explode. A choice between firing 2 magic bolts, one that normally goes forward as it does originally, but another bolt that flies diagonally upward in the forward direction. The other choice is to fire magic beams instead of magic bolts. Now the special thing is this..." And as he activated some mechanism. The Vic Viper released a green sphere of magic energy that seemed to follow Shining around. "This sphere is called an option. Whenever the Vic fires, this option will also fire depending on what my current firing projectile is. Last but not least, it can activate two energy-pulsing gears to act as a shield."

"That's about the gist of it sir!" Flash replied as he tested out the Lord British on a few training dummies, which softly exploded in a puff of smoke "but don't forget, the Vic Viper allows its user to fly no matter the wielder's race, that's one of the reasons why the Vic is deemed legendary. the Lord British has the same abilities and mechanisms as the Vic Viper."

"Right then." Shining nodded as the green option dissipated with the click of another button.

"I've also researched on all the other weapons that we received from the brothers. I had a hard time finding information about the black weapons, but that's exactly why they're called 'black' weapons."

"By the way..." Shining asked "what's with the toy penguin weapons?"

"Hey Ivan!" Vinyl chirped "let's go have some tea and eat some fish!"

"Vinyl, stop being such a kid." Octavia sighed "I still don't know why we get armed toys. What ever can they do?" She paused for a moment to look at Toby while Vinyl continued playing with Ivan.

"Really. What can you do?" Octavia asked as if she was expecting a response from the motionless and inanimate Toby. As she held the the toy in her arms, she noticed the small copyright tag sticking out on the bottom.

" 'If you are reading this..." Octavia read "then you need to know that this is not an actual toy. It is a weapon built by the Rockhopper penguins of Neighpon by the request of Equestria's secret service.  In order to activate it, tug the 2 blond feathers at the same time.' Hmm... That simple? Let's try it out..." And following the tag's instructions, pulled on the yellow feathers near it's eye. As a response, the toy made blood-curling penguin noises, startling the musical ponies.

"Octy! What did you do to Toby!?" Vinyl cried

"I-I don't know!" Octavia replied "there was this instruction to pull on the yellow feathers to activate it's weapon mode!" After a few noises, the penguin changed into it's sliding position and to the silent amazement from the 2 ponies, was floating in the air.

"N-No way..." Octavia gasped "so this is why it's a secret weapon."

"Do you think you can fly with it?" Vinyl asked

"Let's see..." Octavia tested as she grabbed the arms of Toby. Sure enough, as Toby felt pressure in his arms, he started to move slowly.

"Woah!" Octavia screamed and fell to the ground. The penguin stopped and continued hovering in the air

"Be careful Miss Octavia." Flash approached "the penguins will start to move whenever you apply pressure to its arms. The more pressure you apply, the faster it goes."

"Really?"

"In order to change direction, all you have to do is tilt the penguin in the desired direction." Flash instructed "Try it out!"

"Okay then..." Octavia sighed and with a deep breath, placed her hooves on the penguin and applied pressure. The penguin started to move once more

"Don't look down, don't look down." Octavia gulped. After a few seconds, she opened her eyes to see that everything was all right.

"Okay then, let's put on some more pressure." Octavia determinedly huffed to herself. Adding more pressure, Toby started to fly faster to the point of pushing Octavia into it's slipstream.

"No fear now, going to change the direction." Octavia breathed and started titling Toby. Sure enough, Toby started to change direction without any difficulty.

"You're doing great Octavia." Flash remarked. With that motivation and confidence, Octavia made a small smile and clutched hard on the penguin. The next thing that the pegasus and unicorn could see was an Earth Pony flying through the air, clutching hard to a penguin.

"Oh my goodness!!! This is extremely exciting!!!" Octavia yelled with sophistication.

"Even with having fun, she still speaks formally." Vinyl sighed

"And that is what determines Miss Octavia." Flash concluded. "I'll be checking the Princesses now."

In another patch of skies, the princesses were having fun with their bunny-invented rockets.

"This thing's fast!" Twilight yelled "maybe this isn't bad at all!"

"Indeed Twilight!" Cadence agreed "I think this is the best gift ever!"

"Now..." Twilight remembered "how do we get the weapons activated?"

"Allow me Princess..." Flash approached, "all you need to do is this... You'll need to connect your magic to the rocket."

"Okay..." Cadence nodded, and tried to do it first. An energetic, jumpy and fluffy feeling coursed through the mind of the princess.

"Ooh! My mind feels so soft and fluffy..." Cadence giggled "so many bunnies!"

"Next procedure, just simply use your magic. However, the magic from your horn becomes the missile."

"I don't understand..." Twilight asked,

"Basically, when you normally fire offensive magic, it comes from your horn, correct? Now, if you use your magic, it will come from the rocket instead. Depending on what you fire, say, single projectiles, the missile will launch mini projectiles of their own enhanced with your magic."

"Let's see..." Twilight tired it out, as she aimed at a wooden dummy Flash provided, The two eyes on the missile fired a different projectile in succession, obliterating the target.

"Woah!" Twilight gasped "that's amazing!"

"These rabbits are very cunning and smart when it comes to anything." Flash explained, "I believe Fluttershy's rabbit shares some similarity with them."

"Any other weapons?" Cadence asked with excitement.

"Hawk wind, missiles that fire either to the bottom or top, and will glide across any surface. Spread bomb, large bombs for destroying any targets on the ground. Carrot, every time you launch a projectile, three carrot missiles launch from the missile with it. Formation Option, like the most of the other weapons, you get a special partner drone. In this case, it will be a cute rabbit drone, where it can launch the same things as you do, Hawk wind, Spread bomb and Carrot. The special thing about your options however, is that depending on which missile attack you choose, be it the Hawk Wind or Spread Bomb. The options you have will place themselves in different formations. Picking the Hawk wind places the options adjacent to you, this is the formation option. For spread bomb, the options will be constantly rotate around your surroundings, this is the rolling option. Last but not least, the Star. Since you've had your experience of being showmares, a beautiful pattern of stars will surround you. This will not only make you look very glamorous, but also acts as a shield. Any questions?"

"Just one, how do you know all of these weapons?" Twilight asked,

"During my years of military service, I have taken a large interest in weapons. From melee, magic and legendary weapons." Flash smiled, "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to make sure that Lady Rainbow and Lady Fluttershy can handle the black weapons." And he flew off.

"Huh, Flash looks rather bland on the outside, but his knowledge and demeanour is certainly... Frightening. Do you think the same?" Cadence asked,

"I fear I may be scarred for life if I find out..." Twilight replied "one thing's for certain though, I'm glad he's on the side of Equestria and the law!"

Finally, Flash visited the two pegasi friends, examining their weapons.

"Whowee!" Rainbow spotted "just the stallion I needed to see! You have any idea what this thing can do?"

"It destroys large acres of land and can vaporise anything and anypony in it's way if the wielder so wishes it. A weapon so dangerous that it is deemed a 'black' weapon and is illegal and forbidden in all of Equestria and beyond." Flash answered,

"Yikes." Was all Rainbow could say, Fluttershy just shook in terror as she tried to hold the Black Viper with trembling hooves and legs.

"And that's why I'm here to instruct you on how to use the Shooting Star and Black Viper. These weapons are special. They automatically have two option drones once powered up and are auto targeted on enemies. That is to replace their option slot, where instead, the weapon generates 'black power' to power up their weapons, drones and projectiles."

"Sweet!" Rainbow continued,

"Now the special feature of these weapons is that it has a 'charge & release' mechanism. Two modes can be selected, one is wide shot, circular blasts will fire out, covering a wide range. More power, the more circular blasts fired in a spread pattern."

"And the second one?" Rainbow asked,

"Spark Laser. Charging and releasing the trigger will fire a very thick beam. The more power, the longer duration it will fire."

"Cool." Rainbow smiled, Fluttershy still kept on shaking.

"One more thing. The weapon will also generate a force field to protect the user. This is called the Psycho Field." Flash instructed then flew to Fluttershy "don't worry about what you have in your hooves. If you don't want to use it, then that's alright. You can hand it over to the authorities."

"N-No." Fluttershy replied "I-I don't like holding let alone using a weapon like this... But I just can't give away such a gift this dangerous... I'm sorry about this."

"No problem, it is rightfully yours after all. You can always leave it in the holster, you wouldn't need it much anyway." Flash comforted, looking at his watch he remembered something. "I believe it is time to be present at the Parodius Bureau, we wouldn't want to be late to our first day of the job!"

Meanwhile in Parodius Inc, Flim and Flam seemed to be discussing about something

"Are you sure this would work brother?" Flam asked,

"Well of course brother! With the money we collect from our employees, we'll be super rich and will afford everything for ourselves!"

"Yes... Lots and lots of beautiful mares. Heh heh heh..." And the two started daydreaming of themselves being surrounded by tons of giggling sexy mares.

"That's right girls! Your body earns your dough!" Flim laughed,

"Come and get some! Make us feel good!" Flam laughed with him, until one of the mares slapped both of them. This woke the brothers up, finding themselves looking at 16 angry ponies.

"Wh-Wha?" Flim and Flam darted their heads around, realising it was just a dream.

"Pardon me if I misheard myself, but does it sound to me that they were going to take the money for their own?" Rarity asked,

"Retaining salaries and wages from employees is a crime, with consequences of high fines and even imprisonment." Flash added

"Umm... It's just a dream!" The brothers gulped.