Celestia Makes Dinner.

by overlord-flinx

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 1225

Celestia makes a simple dinner... How hard can that be?

One average evening, one average princess, one average kitchen, and one average checklist on how to cook... Somehow, this sounds very familiar.

A simple one-Shot about sweet Celestia doing perhaps one of the most mundane tasks... Again, this sounds familiar.

Published 2014-09-05 20:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2014-09-05 20:50:02 UTC

Mac n' Cheese

Most humblest greetings my sweet sister Celestia,

I regret that I must delegate a near trivial matter such as this to that of a note; however, due to a summons in response to recent events, events that need not bear repeating, sweet sister. Regardless, I am under stringent parameters in light of these events, thus I leave a simple note for you to explain your late-night situation. Due to a slight oversight on my own part, months ago I swore an oath to our tea/supper chef that he may have this exact night off every year... I still question the reasoning behind such a deal, why only the one night and such. No matter, I suppose. It has, however, placed you in a precarious situation.

I am aware that you are profoundly better at preparing breakfast than I. Granted, my only time of preparing breakfast had been my last... By royal decree, if I may expand upon the point, sweet sister. However... if memory is to serve me right, evening meals had eluded you in our youth. Fear not though! Your sister Luna was gifted foresight in this matter and took the liberty to work up a small dinner for you. Think nothing of it, sweet Celestia; it is merely my thanks for your hard work in recent events; and the dedication you have shown to me.

As for the meal I have prepared for you. I have ordered the chef before he departed to place the platter I made in the box of refrigeration. Simply follow the instructions below and all shall be well.

With great love,

Luna.

"Oh, Luna-Luna-Luna... Ye of little faith. You should know by now not to doubt your older sister. While I do appreciate the gesture, I think I'll capitalize on this opportunity to show you just how much your sister has learned in your years away." A sly, confident smirk swept a line across Celestia's face after she finished reading through Luna's letter. Luna obviously was issuing a challenge to Celestia after Celestia 'shamed' her before the breakfast fiasco. Or, maybe Luna just wanted to be nice and prepare dinner for her sister after the three months of reconstruction that had to be done to Canterlot... Perhaps Celestia would just make something small to prove her point, and eat Luna's dish to be nice.

With a small nod and a gentle pat atop the avian head of her dear phoenix Philomena, Celestia excused herself from her study and tip-hoofed down the dimly lit halls of Canterlot castle. Down the hall, across the parlor, around a dozen or so watch-guards doing just a terrific job of protecting the princess. As Celestia crept and slinked around the dark halls of the castle, she considered if she would have to apply a mandatory night-shift training session for her guards... As well as considering why she was sneaking through her own house... Bah, it was too fun to end JUST yet.

It did not take long for Celestia to meet the doors of the closed kitchen. Slowly, with a hint of her magic, Celestia creaked the door open and poked her head in. Just like Luna said, not a soul was in the kitchen. Not a chef, not a server, not a cleaner (which would have to be addressed in the morning, of course); and the kitchen itself was near pitch black except for the pale illumination of the moon coming in from the skylight. Celestia had a glint from the tip of her horn trigger all of the dormant lights in the kitchen to flicker on and set the room ablaze with light. The princess of the morning herself had to squint her eyes suddenly with the bright shock of white in the kitchen cutting into her eyes. "Oh! Yes, right... Note to self, have the white tiles in the kitchen exchanged for something less... Reflective," Celestia blinked a few times, trying to get the bright spots out of her eyes before she started cooking.

Now, she had to think... What would make a good evening meal? What's good for dinner? What goes best with supper? What do you have for tea? There had to be something... Broasted spinach with a light vinaigrette? No, far too extravagant. What would she tell Luna when she got home? 'Sorry, sister. I didn't eat your nasty-nasty plate of food because I wanted some classy food!'. Horrible. Just horrible... No, Celestia would have to think outside of the box for this one. Something... Simple... Of course! It was so simple. Celestia horn grew bright as she started to orchestrate all of the cabinets and cupboards in the kitchen to her will. As boxes, mixes, bags and bowls cascaded through the air, Celestia thought back to something her prized student once told her.

Have you ever had macaroni and cheese, princess? It's really yummy! My sitter, Cadance, makes it for me every night she watches me! She even lets me help make it! She said it's so easy, and it is!

Finally Celestia found it within the clutter of cascading boxes and kitchen delights. A simple box with an animated mitten on it in front of a freshly prepared bowl of "mac n' cheese". "Alright, Mister Heifer Helper... How do you make Mac n' cheese?" Celestia muttered to herself as she turned the box over with her magic to read the instructions scrolled out on the back; the box rattling with little macaroni noodles as the box turned.

How to make on stove-top:

1. Stir the macaroni into 6 cups boiling water.

It was as simple as Twilight had said. The box was soon emptied of all the noodles into a hovering pot. Celestia guided the pot over to the stove and gently placed it over one of the burns, finally letting the magic hold disappear off of it. One by one, glass cups ducked under a now running faucet of water, filling themselves up only to be poured right back out into the pot until Celestia counted out six total cups of water.

2. Boil rapidly, stirring occasionally for 7 to 9 minutes or until the macaroni is tender.

...Seven to nine minutes... The box was quickly turned over once again for Celestia to read the front of the box. "Heifer Helper Instant Mac N' Cheese". Instant? Since when did the definition of instant become seven to nine minutes? And further more... Where was the instruction on how to work in the cheese? What sort of macaroni and cheese didn't have cheese? It was clear that Celestia would have to improvise on the directions a little. It was clear that this box was a simple misprint. First of all, she would have to make these noodles instantly tender. All it takes is a simple spell of flashing time and--

Globs, chunks, wedges... That was what Luna was greeted with at the front gates of Canterlot Castle in the morning. All of her guards plastered against the walls and ceiling by thick wads of smooth, warm cheese and bits of noodles throughout the entire castle and gardens. The only thing that wasn't plastered by cheese was her older sister, quietly chewing spoonfuls of a single bowl of her own craft.

"...And why did you not eat my broasted spinach and vinaigrette?"