Metal In Equestria

by SurrenderedEndeavor

Rating: mature
Tags: Romance, Comedy, Tragedy, Adventure, Human
Length: 2048

A metal band from Chicago is flung into Equestria, thanks to Twilight Sparkle's curiosity.

A crazy group of foul-mouthed guys in a band known as Superkill are transported to Equestria thanks to one of Twilight's spells. With emminent danger threatening the land, Celestia will have to give them the chance to fight back!

Everything will get crazy! Especially for Twilight!

Will the normally rude boys find what they've actually been looking for? In Ponyville of all places?

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-04-18 21:48:59 UTC

Metal Band 1

Metal In Equestria: Chapter 1

It was about one in the morning at an unnamed night club in Chicago, near the heart of the city. It was still lit brilliantly even into the early morning hours. Backstage the band was yammering, and they were mostly drunk. "…and then she tells me 'oh Napoleon Dynamite was the greatest fucking movie ever!' Then I told her 'look, it's not like it cured cancer or some shit like that! It ain't that great!'" Jiggs yelled. The air in the backstage lounge was dense with cigarette smoke and the paint was peeling off the walls.

There were two couches placed opposite to each other against the walls, Jiggs stood up between them. On one sofa sat Packie, a shy guy who happened to have some raw talent with music and was listening to Jiggs yammer. Opposing him was Wallace, who was half-drunk and more asleep. "Ya man, I hate it when my little brother says some stupid-ass shit like that. I'm glad I don't have to deal with that little turd anymore." Packie said.

Wallace sat up, his blue jeans looked somewhat moist. His long brown hair was tangly and ratty since he rarely showered. His dirty pale skin was a testament to this. "Cool story bro." Wallace said rather nonchalantly. "Shut the hell up Wally!" Jiggs yelled back. They rarely got along when they were partially drunk. Only the phase in between sobriety and being hammered was unpleasant. "Well when does this show start? My fingers are twitching" Wallace said. "Like in 10 minutes or something… I figured we'd have been out there by now." Packie replied "Hey Jiggs, quit smoking that shit, it smells like your mom's scrotum in here." Jiggs was pretty pissed now. "Well I bet her scrotum was bigger than yours, blondie!"

Packie put his hand on his head and ran down the length of his clean, short, blond hair. He looked up at him with a clever look on his face. "Y'kno that just made you sound like an idiot, with a mom who's got some non-metaphorical balls, right?" Packie replied. Jiggs looked down at Wallace on the couch, as if he were depressed. "Yeah but I don't really give a shit. Just grab your case Pack, we're on now." "Bout fuckin time…" said Wallace.

As the crew was about to perform their show, unbeknownst to them, a parallel universe had its own events unfolding.

Twilight Sparkle was reading one of the many books in her library. This was nothing out of the ordinary for her as she hadn't had any adventures with her other friends recently. She looked gloomily at the book, reading rather slowly. Her tree house library was rather quiet and she thought that Fluttershy must have taken the birds out somewhere, for there were no singing birds today. "Hey Twilight!" called Spike. The purple dragon stood but a foot in stature, and Twilight barely noticed him standing right next to her. "Yeah, what is it? I've almost got that spell." she said somewhat irritated. Spike looked up at her annoyed. "…well, I thought you might want to see what I found." he said. "Sure!" she exclaimed, "Hit me with it."

Spike started "so, I found this in one of the upper levels, it was kinda torn up, but I know we've had pretty good luck with those kinds of books before…" he kept on "… but this particular one is dated almost 2,500 years ago." She looked at him astonished. That was the oldest book she had ever seen, and it was in fairly good condition considering its age. She also made the realization that this book was written before the time of Princess Celestia. "What's the title?" was all she could say.

"I'm not sure…" he said "…the letters are faded… and… I just don't know, can you take a look?" He scanned the outside of the book, flipping it over in his claws. She levitated the book out of his grip in front of her. She could hardly make out the letters of the title, DI M N SIO AL- SPEL S. She looked perplexed at Spike. "If I'm not mistaken, this is a book to traverse other dimensions."

Spike replied quickly, "Which means… what exactly?" Twilight walked across the room. She knew quite well the seriousness of the power which she possessed and also the spells which the book might hold. Pacing back and forth around the room she contemplated even opening the book, but then it struck her that the Princess herself probably didn't even know about this. The thought of this caused her to immediately open and start reading the book, because she could finally know something the Princess did not. She skimmed pages at first, rapidly. "Are you sure this is a good idea?" said Spike. "Not really, but it's a book of magic and there aren't too many of those left. Plus I've never seen a book quite like this one in Canterlot."

"Do you think the princess would like to know? I mean… that book's older than she is after all. She probably has never seen something like that."Spike chimed in.

"I know, but…I've never seen it before either, and why would it be sitting in Ponyville's library? I'll tell her after I read some of it for myself."said Twilight with a somewhat suspicious tone in her voice. Spike ran up to her and closed the book with a loud CLAP! She looked at him, annoyed. "I think you should tell her. It's only polite and she could help you possibly." He said defensively. "I know, I know… but I saw a spell in the book about Earth." She mentioned this because up until that point in history, Earth was considered only a scientific theory. Possibly it was Equestria in another dimension or universe as some pony scientists speculated. But then again, what point was there to science in a world where magic existed. Science in Equestria was a dying profession, since every pony was perfectly happy there using only magic.

Spike walked around the room and shook his head. "There's no way that's possible. Some ponies said that a long time ago and everypony laughed at them. I don't want to see that happen to you." Twilight started "well from what I've studied, Earth is entirely plausible. The science was there and there is no other explanation for all of the non-magical ponies. They could've come here maybe using one of these spells from Earth. It's been speculated even that there are ponies there if it exists." Spike stopped and looked in disbelief. He got wide-eyed and a distrustful smirk came across his face. "Yeah but there is barely any proof to support that."

"I know…" she said "… but doesn't it sound like it's worth a try? We could maybe find a dragon for you, though…" she thought for a moment, searching her memory, "…I haven't heard of any existing there." Spike liked the idea, but reality set in for him. "And how do you know that? There probably isn't even an Earth." Twilight looked out her window. "We won't know till we try."

Back on Earth, In Chicago's underbelly, the city was a buzz and lively.

Jiggs and Packie were setting up equipment on stage of the club. The blue curtains between them and the crowd was all that separated them. Wallace brought out the instrument cases, black and white stickers covering them. His curly brown hair dangled in his face as he set down the cases and brushed it out of the way with his hand. His black shirt had the two letters "SK" on it and they were traced with molten lava as a graphic design. It was Packie's idea for the design and the other guys weren't feeling creative that day. "Hey asshole, where's the amps?" They had to yell because the crowd on the other side of the curtain was restless and loud.

"They're under those blankets" Jiggs said. He was essentially the team captain, but only because he could afford the good stuff. Wallace took off the blankets, revealing two, five foot high amps. "Yeah they set me back about 3 g's each, but if this show plays good we'll make that back tonight!" Jiggs walked over to Wallace and the amps. His black hair reached to his shoulders on each side, long and straight with a part down the center. He had a bit of a beer belly and almost always had a cigarette in hand. He wore a black shirt with the words "And they walked" on it. These were the lyrics for one of their songs they would play later, a crowd favorite. "We can't turn em up too high, they'll blow… but the crowd should be able to hear us just fine!" The noise of the crowd was near deafening.

Packie finished setting up the microphone. Even though Jiggs had the money and brains to run the group, it was Packie who had the talent. He walked over to his guitar case. Hand written in red spray paint on the side of it said "If man saw all colors at once, then he could relinquish his prejudices" Packie thought of that once and thought it sounded deep and thoughtful or something like that. The case also had a large black sticker with yellow letters reading "LET IT FLY" He always had a recurring dream of flying and thought that suited him best, it was his favorite dream.

He opened the case and took out his ESP-1000 LTD guitar. He spent two years trying to pay it off, the best years of his life, and he knew it was well worth it. It was jet black and he wouldn't have it any other way.

"Hey dream boy!"Packie snapped out of it, staring blankly at his guitar. Wallace continued "… dude wake up! We're on in like 2 minutes or something!" He was setting up his last cymbal in a hurry, "SABIAN" was written on the side. He adjusted his seat and sat down, feet on the bass pedals. His legs were going to hurt in the morning. Jiggs shut his case, half-holding his custom made Gibson Grabber II bass guitar. At the same time both Packie and Jiggs jacked into their amps which read "MARSHALL" on the top. The two turned around and faced the direction of the crowd, though the curtain was still between them.

"You fuckers ready?" shouted the club owner."You guys are the last act so make it glorious, you get me?" he said louder. He was standing just off stage and the guys could just barely hear him. Wallace looked at the backs of Jiggs and Pack, both wearing black shirts. 'We need more color' he thought to himself. Packie raised the height of the microphone for himself, he was the only vocalist. "Yeah yeah, we know, we'll sound like heaven opened up or something!"Jiggs said, catching his breath. "It'll be good, get me?"

The curtains started to pull to the side, fairly quickly, Packie's blond hair shimmering in the bright light. The stage was open and Packie moved closer to the mic. He put one hand on it and kept one his guitar. The crowd got quiet and he spoke into it "so… we… are a band…" He stopped for a second. The sound of wine glasses made tinkling noises as they hit tables, the crowd's interest on Packie. He kept going "…and we are here… to make sure you all enjoy yourselves." He stopped again and looked back. Wallace gave him a nod. Jiggs looked to Packie and said "Let it fly, fucker."

Packie moved in close to the stand. He spoke calmly at first and then became more guttural in tone, "I play guitar, he plays bass, and he plays drums…" as he pointed to them "and we are gonna play some songs and if you don't like em then FUCK YOU! WE ARE SUPERKILL!" He put both hands on his guitar and Jiggs did the same and dropped his cigarette. Wallace brought up his sticks and clacked them together. "ONE,TWO,THREE!" Wallace shouted angrily. The club flooded with sound.

….To be continued