Fallout Equestria: A Day in the Life
Fallout Equestria: A Day in the Life
A Wasteland Short Story by volrathxp
What can I say? This is the life!
Guard duty. Guard duty never changes.
I mean, come on. Guard duty is pretty daggone boring if you ask me. It's the same thing, day in and day out. Raiders get close to our settlement, and we shoot them. Slavers get close to our settlement, and we shoot them. Hellhounds get close to the settlement... well we hope not. Haven't ever had that one come up before. I suppose we'll just die horribly then.
I suppose one might wonder, if guard duty is so excruciatingly mind-numbing, why am I doing it? Well, on one hoof, it's pretty consistent pay. I make enough caps that one day I'll be able to just settle down and relax for a good long time. Maybe even try and find a tropical island somewhere... if they still exist that is. Heck, I'd take a pool of clean water every now and then! On the other hoof, it's gotten me out of my previous occupation.
You see, I used to be a thief. The Infamous Outlaw Night Lock, they called me. Well, I called myself that, at least. That's right, I was a thief... in a lawless Wasteland of looters, raiders, and other unspeakable horrors. Anyways, as a professional thief I stole things for other ponies, griffons, you name it. I was good too. I've broken into some of the biggest and best places ever. I've stolen from Steel Rangers, Red Eye, and even broke into Tenpony Tower once!
So then why, out of all the awesome places in the Wasteland that I could be hanging out, am I pulling guard duty in a dump of a wasted town called Dodge Junction?
I ask myself that every morning I wake up, to be honest.
I look up to the morning sky. Drizzling rain comes down from above and I grumble beneath my helmet. Rainy mornings suck. The tower I'm in is relatively exposed to the elements, thanks to the gigantic hole in the canvas above. Still, at least there's a breeze.
“Raider,” my spotter next to me says. I nod and engage my battle saddle, bringing my sniper rifle to the fore. My sights align on a blood-crazed pony yelping and hooting beyond the wall. He's got a cleaver in his mouth, and he's hacking at one of our KEEP OUT signs. I sigh, pulling the trigger. Raider pony's head goes kaboom in a colorful explosion of gory red.
“Don't raiders ever get bored?” I say under my breath.
My spotter chuckles, putting down his binoculars.
“Nah, they ain't got the brains to be bored,” he says.
I disengage the battle saddle and sigh.
My spotter cocks an ear at me. “You alright this morning, Lock? You seem a little off.”
“I just... have you ever wondered if there's more to life than this, Shot?” I blurt out. “Like, if there was something out there better than just poppin' raiders every day?”
“What? You're Mister Big Shot, aren't you? You used to be out there,” Strike Shot says, grinning widely. “Why not go back?” I grimace hesitantly.
“I... I can't do that,” I say, flapping my good left wing at him. “You know why that is.”
“Right, right,” Shot replies, pulling his binoculars back up to his eyes. “I forgot, you lost a wing during the greatest heist in the entire Wasteland.”
“I did!” I protest. “It was my greatest achievement in my history as a thief! And also my greatest failure... That's why I'm no longer the Infamous Outlaw Night Lock.”
Shot rolls his eyes.
“Right, and I'm a Goddesses-damned Ministry Mare. Got another raider comin' up,” he says.
I grumble, engaging my battle saddle. I take aim and I shoot. Pop. Another raider head explosion littering the road with bloody remains. I drop the rifle and sigh again.
“Just never ends, does it?” I say aloud. Shot snorts, and I glare at him. “What?”
“You crack me up, Lock. You go on and on about how boring this place is, and how much you miss being out there, but yet you're still here,” he says. “Shooting raiders with me. I'm starting to wonder whether the Infamous Outlaw ever actually existed.”
My eyes widen. How dare he think I'm making this up!
“He did too! I mean, I did too!” I shout. “I really did do all those things!”
“Prove it, then,” Shot says, smirking at me.
“I really – wait what?” I say, blinking. “Prove it?”
“Yeah, prove it. Prove to me that you were the greatest thief in the Wasteland,” Shot says. “Give me something concrete, otherwise shut the fuck up and get back to shootin' raiders.” He turns his attentions to his binoculars. “Speakin' of which, you got about three comin' in.”
I tear away from Shot and back to my sniper rifle. Three sharp retorts later, three dead raiders join the others we've killed so far this morning. I turn back to Shot.
“Alright, you want me to prove that I really am the Infamous Outlaw?” I ask. Shot nods calmly, a sharp grin on his face. “Fine, then I will.” I lift up my right forehoof and remove the boot on it. I extend the appendage out for him to see.
Shot's eyes widen, and then he cocks his head in confusion.
“You painted your hoof red.” he says flatly. I groan.
“No, you dummy. My hoof was painted red to mark me as a thief. That's why I keep it covered up all the time. Happened when I got caught at Tenpony Tower. I can't go back there, for sure,” I say. “They know me there. I can never remove the mark of the thief.”
Shot blinks and then places his own forehoof on my own.
“You fucking idiot, it's just paint. And it's fresh. You did this earlier this morning,” he says angrily. “Now would you please show me some actual proof? I'm getting a little tired of the games.”
I sigh, replacing the boot on the hoof, muttering about how he would know how magic paint that marked a pony as a thief was supposed to work.
“Fine. You remember what I told you before about my final heist? The one where I lost my wing.”
“Yeah, you never shut up about that one,” Shot says. He peeks out the binoculars again. “Geez, few more raiders incoming.”
I nod, pulling up the sniper rifle once more. There's at least five raiders this time, all wearing the same markings as the ones we've already downed. I kick my reload in and go to work, sowing death in the ranks of the crazed ponies. Five clean shots and they're all down.
“So, there I was, hired by none other than one of Red Eye's personal attaches to acquire a magical orb of power from an old abandoned museum on the outskirts of Manehattan,” I say casually, setting my sniper rifle to my side. “At least that's what he called it. I'm not really sure what it was.”
“Yeah, yeah, I've heard this part. Get to the part with the proof,” Shot says.
“I'm telling a story here,” I say, growling under my breath.
Shot rolls his eyes.
“Oh, I'm sorry,” he replies. I can practically hear the sarcasm dripping in his voice. “Please continue.”
“Alright, so there I was heading into this old museum...”
*******************************
“This place looks like a dump,” I said, looking up at the front of the ruined museum. The sign next to the museum's entrance had rotted away completely, leaving only the letters EUM visible. I trotted up to one of the doors, pulling it open. The door fell off its hinges, nearly splattering me into the ground. Thankfully, I jumped back to avoid it.
I stepped into the museum lobby and whistled. This place hadn't been touched since the end of the war, it seemed. Skeletons littered the lobby in huddles of three to four a piece. One large pile indicated that there had been a tour group of some sort going on during the Last Day. I sighed. What a worthless waste of life, I thought. Several neat looking displays also dotted the room, showing small pieces of art in addition to a large map of the museum. Unfortunately the map was rotted away, meaning I couldn't use it. I sighed and started trotting towards the exhibit halls.
Red Eye's contact said that the orb thingy was in one of the main exhibit halls. His documentation from an old newspaper said that the orb was being billed as the 'Electro Orb', an item of apparently great power. I shifted past an old desk that had fallen in the hall, keeping an eye out for any security measures that might have activated. Old places such as this had an annoying habit of having security robots that still thought the zebra were attacking.
Seeing nothing, I continued forward. The main exhibit hall looked as though somepony had digested its contents thoroughly and then spat them back out for good measure. Displays of foreign pony cultures lay smashed in pieces, while several sculptures of the Princesses were torn apart. A few of them were even missing their heads. I shuddered as I passed them.
I made my way through the main exhibit hall, feeling as though somepony was watching me. Despite the odd sensation, I pressed onward. I stopped in front of the largest display in the hall. The sign for it had fallen to the ground in front of the display. It read SEE THE WONDROUS ELECTRO-ORB! IT SHIMMERS, IT SHINES, IT PULSES!I glanced up at the pedestal. Sitting just on top of the display was a perfectly round sphere, still flickering in the darkness. I grinned, taking wing to fly up to the top of the display to acquire my prize...
****************************
“Wait. So somepony just left the thing there out in the open?” Shot interrupts.
I glower at him.
“Would you at least let me finish?” I ask.
Shot shrugs and pokes his head back into his binoculars. “Sure, but you got some more raiders out there,” he says.
I groan, pulling my rifle up. Three more of the buggers. How many has that been so far today? Seven? Ten? I've lost count. Three quick retorts of the rifle and raider brain adds to the already gory decorations along our main road. I put my rifle down and turn back to Shot.
“Alright, now then... where was I...?” I say aloud.
“You were just about to tell me why some fucking idiot left something so valuable just lying around out in the open,” Shot replies. “I mean, fuck... somepony would have had to have looted the place before you.”
“Well if you wouldn't interrupt me, I'd be able to explain that,” I say. “Anyways, I was flying up to the display to claim the Electro-Orb...”
*******************************
I landed on the display next to the sphere. It pulsed and flickered, giving off an eerie light. I took a few steps toward it, reaching out to claim it from its final resting place when I noticed something on the side of it. A sticker had been placed on the sphere so that nopony looking up at it from below would notice it.
I peered closely to read the sticker. I blinked.
REPLICA – Made in Neighpon
“Arrghh!!” I shouted loudly, smacking the sphere with my forehoof. The thing was a fake! The whole trip had been a complete waste of time! I growled, hitting the sphere again and again. Due to the absolutely cheap manufacturing, the sphere fell to the ground, shattering into a thousand pieces. An alarm began to sound, echoing in the main exhibit hall.
“Umm... uh oh,” I said. I jumped into the air and glided to the ground, trying to remember which way I'd come in to the hall. A security robot suddenly appeared out nowhere, its metallic forehoof lifting to reveal a high powered magical energy blaster.
“HALT INTRUDER,” it said in its overly robotic voice. It fired, spewing hot fiery death at me. I jumped behind one of the overturned tables and engaged my battle saddle, barely missing being turned into a puddle of goo. A sleek custom made pistol whipped out to my side. I took aim and fired several shots at the robot. Sparks flew through the air as my bullets punched through the rusted metal monstrosity. It fell over in a heap of sparking, smoking junk.
I breathed a sigh of relief. The alarms were still going off, but at least it was nothing more than robots. Robots I could handle. I grimaced, looking for a way out of the main hall. I had to get back into the back offices. I figured if the Electro-Orb that had been on display was a fake, that the museum had to have the real thing somewhere.
I leaped into the air, trying to get my bearings. There! A door at the back of the hall that said EMPLOYEES ONLY! I flapped my wings, soaring happily towards the door when several more security bots began firing at me. Forced to land, I tucked and rolled under a display of Neighpon Pony culture. The remnants of once beautiful plates and sculptures melted under the laser fire of the robots. I jumped out and sprinted across the hall until I hit the door.
It was locked. Shit, I thought. Shit shit shit! I could hear the robots whirring behind me. I needed to get through this door! Pulling out my trusty bobby pin and screwdriver, I went to work. I panicked, jamming the screwdriver into the lock so hard it broke. Howling, I kicked at the lock until it fell through the door. Blasts of laser fire seared the walls around me. I jumped through the door and landed on my face. I could hear the monotonous demands of the robots bearing down on me.
I sat up and reached into my saddlebags. I pulled out a blue-banded apple grenade. With a grin, I ripped the pin out and tossed it back into the hallway. A loud *BANG* followed by several loud pops told me that the robots would be troubling me no more. The alarm still blared in the distance. I was going to have to be careful now that the security system had been activated.
I turned around and groaned. The room was tiny, made smaller by shelves filled with cleaning supplies. Brooms and mops sat propped up in the corner. I'd broken into a fucking broom closet! I'd even broken my screwdriver for this!
“Great, just great...” I said aloud. Sighing, I wheeled about and made my way back to the busted door. I peered out into the exhibit hall and breathed a sigh of relief. The robots had thankfully been reduced to molten slagheaps. I grinned.
“Yeah, stupid robots,” I said. I took a moment to scan the rest of the exhibit hall. Along the far back wall was several double doors that looked important. I decided to give them a shot. I crept along, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. I made it to the doors in record time and breathed a major sigh of relief when I found that they were unlocked. I pulled open the doors and nearly jumped for joy. A long hallway extended deeper into the building. Doors sat along each of the walls. Each one of them was closed.
I started trotting down the hall. I stopped after a few minutes when I quickly realized... there weren't any signs anywhere! Not above the doors or on the walls, nothing! How in the heck did ponies get around in this place?! With a groan, I trotted over to the first door and pulled it open...
*******************************
“Wait, you're not seriously going to make me listen to how you got lost and had to open each and every door, are you?” Shot says.
“But it's part of the story!” I protest. “It's all part of the story!”
“Listen, Lock. Either get to the point, or I'll get rid of your other wing,” Shot replies, giving me a deadpan stare.
I gulp loudly. “Fine, fine. To paraphrase, it took me about two hours of locked rooms before I finally found the warehouse portion of the museum.”
Shot's binoculars came up. He groans. “Finish that later,” he said. “Got a group of ghouls incoming.”
I engage my battle saddle and bring up my sniper rifle. Sure enough, four to five feral ghouls are shambling down the road. I grimace and take aim. The ghouls snap and scatter as my shots take out three of them off the bat. Two more shots and the others are dead too.
“Lot of activity today,” I mutter.
“Wasteland is always active,” Shot replies. “Anyways, you were at the warehouse...”
**********************************
“Whoah,” I said upon entering the warehouse. The massive room sprawled out in all directions and was filled with shelves and storage containers. Old oil paintings, sculptures, and statues sat propped up among the shelves, in addition to crates marked FRAGILE. I grinned widely. This had to be the place!
I took a few steps forward and perked my ears up. Up ahead, I could hear the sounds of shuffling hooves and... loud talking? My eyes widened. Were there other ponies here? I dipped into one of the shelves behind two large crates and waited. The shuffling got louder. A foul smell began to assault my senses, nearly causing me to gag. I held my breath as two ghouls came into view. They were wearing what appeared to be security barding.
“Jeez, that alarm is going off like crazy,” one of the ghouls said. His voice grated on my ears.
I continued to hold my breath, hoping and praying that they wouldn't hear me.
“Do you think what the Prophet said is true? That someone got through our defenses?” the other ghoul said. This one sounded... female… ish.
“I think it's probably just a radroach or something. Those things are notorious for setting off alarms,” the first ghoul replied. “Regardless, we're on full alert until the alarm is shut off.”
My eyes widened. Not only were there ghouls living here, but they were the ones who set up the alarm system? What could they be... I blinked. The orb. That had to be the only reason why they'd be guarding themselves so well inside this place. I grimaced, deciding to take a chance and find out. I waited until the two ghouls moved on and then quietly crept out from behind the crates.
Spreading my wings, I flew up to the top shelf so I could see the rest of the warehouse. My jaw dropped. Out of the storage crates and shelves, the ghouls had managed to build a fully functional town! Emergency lighting illuminated the settlement, while massive storage containers had signs on them for the general store and bar. It was all very impressive. However, the most important thing was in the dead center of town.
The Electro-Orb. It was there, sitting on a pedestal much like it had been in the exhibit hall. A low chime emanated from the ghoul at the base of the thing, and every ghoul stopped in unison. I blinked. What the fuck...? I thought. The ghouls prostrated themselves before the orb, almost as if they were praying to it. I scowled. I didn't like having to take the thing, but a job was a job, and I most certainly needed the money. But how was I going to get it from the center of town with every ghoul watching? I needed a plan.
*BANG*
A gunshot echoed from below somewhere. I yelped and looked down, seeing an earth pony ghoul standing next to the shelf I was perching on. She had a sad grimace on her face and a smoking barrel hanging off of her battle saddle. I moved to pull out my own pistol when I felt it. The pain arcing up the side of my body. I looked back and realized what had happened.
You idiot, you've been shot, I thought as my eyes rolled into the back of my head and I passed out. The last thing I remembered was falling down towards the ghoul, her eyes wide as saucers.
*********************************
“Wait, wait, wait. What do you mean, the last thing you remembered? You're not dead, doofus,” Shot interrupts.
“Would you let me finish? Of course I lived, otherwise I wouldn't be here,” I reply, glaring at him fiercely.
“Fine, fine, hurry up then,” Shot says. “It's almost the end of our shift.”
“Alright, so I passed out from being shot, and the next thing I know, I'm awake and tied to a pole in the center of town...”
**************************************
My eyes fluttered open. Where am I? I thought. My vision fought to swim into focus, but eventually I settled on a pair of eyes. A pair of rotting ghoul eyes. I yelped and tried to move away but I couldn't. I was bound to something. I closed my eyes, hoping and praying that the ghoul would go away, but I could still smell him in front of me. I opened my eyes again, and the ghoul grinned.
“Boo,” he said.
I screamed. The ghoul chuckled as he took a few steps back.
“See, Prophet. Just a rat looking for a hole in the ground,” he grated as he looked behind himself.
My terrified eyes followed the ghoul's gaze, meeting those of a much older looking ghoul, this one a unicorn ghoul. Ghoulicorn? Whatever. He was wearing flowing blue robes and he held a staff in his magic. A pointed hat complete with tiny broken bells adorned the ghoul's head. Oh, and he also glowed bright green. It was quite creepy.
“Or a thief, come to take our precious object,” he said. His voice didn't have the same grated quality as the other ghouls. His voice was smoother, silkier.
“What do we do with him, then?” the first ghoul asked.
“Why don't we ask him?” the older ghoul said. He took a few steps towards me, and I could feel the heat coming off of him. “Who are you, and what are you doing here?”
“I... I got lost,” I squeaked. “Was trying to find shelter.” Good... good... lie your way out of this one, Night Lock, I thought. They have to know why you're here, they'd be stupid if they didn't.
“You got lost,” the ghoul replied. “That wouldn't have anything to do with you smashing the replica of the Great Power, would it?”
“The... what?” I said. I glanced up. I could see the orb from where they tied me up. “You mean, that thing?”
The ghoul rolled his eyes at me. “Yes. That thing. Why are you here?”
I sighed. It was time to fess up. Maybe they'd let me go? I highly doubted it, but it was worth the shot. I started to wiggle my wings slightly against the ropes. I was pretty sure they hadn't noticed, because I was quickly on my way to freeing myself. Apparently knot-tying is not a skill taught to crazy religious ghouls.
“Fine, fine. If you must know, I'm here to steal, plunder, and otherwise pillage my weaselly black heart out, and that involves stealing that there Electro-Orb,” I said. “But I promise I won't, if you let me go.” I grinned smugly. I was feeling pretty good about myself, keeping them talking and all.
The assemblage of ghouls, on the other hoof? Not so much good feelings there. I think all they heard was the first part, because all they did was gasp loudly. The older ghoul grimaced at me.
“I see,” he said. “You would seek to desecrate the holy symbol of Electrum? The Great Power is not for the taking.”
“What would you have us do, dear prophet?” one of the ghouls next to the older one asked.
“Execute the thief. No one must know of our society here. The Great Power does not belong to them,” the older ghoul replied. He turned with a swish of his bells and trotted off.
I grimaced. Shit. I knew they weren't going to just let me go! I had to come up with something. “Hold it!”
The older ghoul turned. “What?”
“Don't you want to know who I am first?” I asked.
“I don't particularly care who you are,” the older ghoul said. He glanced at the other ghouls. “Kill him. Slowly, if you will.”
I grinned and snapped my wings out, snapping the ropes. I dropped to the ground and started running away from the mass of ghouls.
“Get him!” I heard the old unicorn ghoul shout from behind me. He did not sound happy.
I jumped over an earth pony ghoul who'd tried to tackle me and spread my wings, taking to the air. I swung around, barely dodging a blast of gunfire that had been leveled my way.
“You idiots! Do not shoot so closely to the Great Power! You'll damage it!” I heard the old ghoul respond.
I grinned, flapping my wings and landing next to the Electro-Orb. I stood triumphantly as the ghouls leveled their weapons at me. I knew they weren't going to shoot, so I reached out with my wings to grab the orb.
“Ghouls of the Museum!” I called out. “I am the Infamous Outlaw... Night Lock!”
“Who?” the unicorn ghoul responded.
I groaned loudly. “You know… master thief and…” I started to say. I could see the crowd starting to glaze over. “You know what, whatever. Look, it’s Princess Celestia!”
I pointed across the settlement, getting at least more than half of them to look away. Quickly, my wings yanked the orb off its pedestal into my waiting hooves. I shot off like a rocket amidst shouts and screams. Upwards I soared, heading towards the skylight above. I was home free! I was... shot. Pain screamed up my sides as I felt it jump right up and bite me in the ass. The orb came tumbling out of my hooves as I fell back down towards the ground.
“Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!” I yelled, trying to extend my wings out to get my bearings. More gunshots echoed throughout the room, just barely missing me. I had thought I was going to make it when a blast from a grenade slammed into my side. The orb and I went flying through the air, tumbling into a shelf full of crates. Thankfully, I landed on pillows. I groaned and sat up.
I tried to move, but sharp pains all up my sides stopped me. I looked down, my eyes widening in horror. My left wing was gone! A charred lump of flesh and bone hung off my side, which was ripped and torn from the blast.
*********************
“Wait, your left wing? But you have your left wing,” Shot interrupts. He sneers at me. “I knew you were just making this shit up, Lock! C'mon already, stop fucking with me.”
“I meant my right wing, alright?” I snap back at him. “It's been a while since I told this story. Some of the details are a little fuzzy.”
“Right, like which wing you lost. That's fuzzy alright,” Shot replies.
“Anyways... as I was saying. I had just lost my wing...”
*********************
My wing! My wing was gone! I struggled to get up, to move, but I was frozen by the pain of losing my wing. My eyes finally drifted from the stump to the orb. It had landed conveniently on the pillow across from me. I groaned. Maybe I didn't want it anymore, but I had to get it. I'd lost too much already on this mission, I wasn't about to lose my prize as well. I felt myself... drawn to it. Like a moth to a flame, I needed it.
With resolve, I began to pull myself over to the orb. It pulsed in the darkness. I lifted it carefully and placed it in my bag. With a grunt, I managed to stand. I had to move. The ghouls would be investigating whether I'd died pretty soon. I could already hear their shouts. I kicked out with my front legs, knocking the back of the crate off.
I looked down and gulped. The shelf I'd landed on was pretty high up, and I would have to climb down to get to an exit. I glanced back at the pillows, an idea forming in my mind. I grabbed some of them and began to tie them to my hooves. With my new pillow shoes intact, I leaped from the side of the shelf. Using my one good wing to slow my descent, I landed on the ground hard. I started moving, discarding the pillows along the way.
Alarms blared as I charged back down into the halls leading to the main exhibit room. Several ghoul patrols shouted at me as I ran past. I had to keep moving. I had to get the hell out of here!
With a final burst of speed, I jumped over the threshold into the exhibit hall. The clacking sounds of guns being loaded met my ears and I dove immediately behind a nearby statue. Laser fire struck the ground where I'd been. My eyes widened as I realized just how close that had been.
“Come out with your hands up!” I heard a gruff voice shout from inside the hall. I peeked out to see who it was. A griffon with an assault rifle stood at the head of several armed mercenaries. They all wore the same insignia: Red Eye. Believing that I was home free, I stepped out cautiously.
“It's okay! It's just me! I was hired to steal the thing!” I shouted back. I pulled my bags aside to show that I had the Electro-Orb.
The griffon snarled under her breath. “Put down the bag and stay still,” she said calmly.
I narrowed my gaze at the griffon. Something about this was off. Way off.
“You're not the one I'm supposed to deliver this to,” I replied.
The griffon cocked her weapon. “I said, put the bag down. Now. As in, right now, before I blow your fucking head off you wingless bird!”
I grimaced. Yeah, I knew what was going down. Send a thief in, and then turn on him so you don't have to fucking pay him, is what was going down. The orb pulsed inside the bag. One look at it, and I knew I didn't want to give it up. It was important. And it wasn't worth the money that Red Eye was offering for it, especially if he was going to renege on his deal and kill me first.
I heard shouting coming from the halls behind me. The ghouls were closing in. Could I use that to my advantage. A sharp grin emerged on my face.
“What are you smirking for, you fucking prick? Drop the bag and get on the ground. I won't say this again!” the griffon snarled.
“Sorry, no deal. I've got to get paid, after all,” I said, preparing to take to the... oh, right the wing. My eyes widened as I tried to come up with another plan that didn't involve me dying. I didn't really want to die. I'd grown rather attached to living.
Thankfully the ghouls chose that exact moment to burst into the exhibit hall and start shooting. The griffon took the first shot straight to the head, going down like a dropped anvil. I yelped as several bullets whizzed right over me. Taking the distraction for what it was, I started galloping forwards. Several of the mercenaries looked like they were going to pursue me before they were suddenly embroiled in battle with the ghouls. I praised Celestia for small miracles.
I weaved through the battle, trying to do my best to stay low so nopony would see me. I had to get out of here before somepony shot me! Ducking behind a statue, I watched as two ghouls tore into one of the mercenaries savagely. He screamed as they ripped apart his body. I shuddered. That was not a way to die.
The two ghouls stopped and turned, looking directly at where I was hiding. I yelped and leaped out to the side as the two ferals jumped onto the statue. I grunted, pushing myself to my hooves. I started running, the ghouls right on my tail. I was running out of room to hide, and the entrance was still far away! One of the ghouls nipped at me, missing my leg by a hair.
A shotgun blast tore at the air behind me, turning the ghouls into paste and splattering my backside with rotted fleshbits. I stopped on a dime, turning towards where the shot had come from. The unicorn that stood across from me was well known to me. He was the leader of a highly strange group of bandits that I'd stolen a lot of caps from. They referred to themselves as the Capitalists. He grinned widely, murder in his eyes.
“We meet again, Night Lock!” he shouted, lifting his shotgun in his magic. His coat was pristine compared to other bandits I'd met, and he wore a clean cut suit and tie. His mane was perfectly slicked back, and I could see a cutie mark of a few pre-war bits on his flank. He was slightly pudgy, but highly dangerous.
“Spiffy Fat Cash,” I said, narrowing my gaze at him.
********************************
“Wait... his name is actually Spiffy Fat Cash?” Shot says.
“Yeah, why?” I ask.
Shot snorts loudly. “That's the most absurd name I've ever heard! You're just making that one up!”
“I'm not! Now would you let me finish?! We don't have a whole lot of time left before shift change,” I say.
Shot rolls his eyes and then looks down his binoculars. “Maybe you oughta take care of them raiders first.”
I grimace, pulling up my sniper rifle. I glare down it, seeing a few more raiders on the road. These ones are different. This lot was wearing nice prewar suits, but they were brandishing weapons. I blink. Could it be...? I think to myself. Shaking the thoughts away, I take aim and fire, dropping all of them within seconds.
“Alright, taken care of,” I say. “Now, as I was saying...”
***********************************
“I see you remember me!” Spiffy Fat Cash proclaimed, still grinning. “I can't forget you, my friend! You have something that belongs to me!”
“Sorry, I don't have your set of Daring Do books you were planning to sell anymore,” I said. “I gave them away to an orphanage.”
Spiffy growled. “Those were mine to sell, and you know it!”
“Sorry about your luck,” I said. The growling of ghouls and the sounds of battle behind me reminded me that I needed to move quickly. “Now, if you'll excuse me. I have somewhere to be.”
“I don't think so,” Spiffy said. “I've been following you for some time now, Lock. I know you came here for something important. I want it instead. Now hand it over!” He brandished his shotgun.
“Just you, Spiff? Please. You know you can't beat me. I'm the Infamous Outlaw,” I replied casually. I grinned at him and darted to the left.
Spiffy snarled, taking aim with the shotgun. Buckshot ate the ground where I'd been standing. I heard shouts of “Get him!!” and “For Capitalism!” as the rest of the Spiffster’s little gang popped up out of the woodwork. The thunderous roar of hooves followed after me.
I jumped past Spiffy, the angry unicorn following me with his shotgun. I kicked out, catching him in the leg. He fell forward, dropping the shotgun to the ground where it discharged into one of his gang members. Spiffy stood, picking the weapon back up in his magic.
“I'm going to get you, Night Lock!!” he roared, giving chase after me.
I dodged and weaved between shots, laughing as I finally made my way to the entrance lobby of the museum. I was home free! Now all I had to do was lose the Spiffinator. The unicorn in question burst into the lobby, waving his shotgun around madly.
“You can't run, Night Lock,” Spiffy said, grinning maniacally. “I know how to find you. You stick out like a sore thumb. Run, and I'll always win. Capitalism always wins.”
“Piss off,” I said angrily. “It's time we end this little game of ours, Spiff. I hate to say this, but it's been fun. Not.” I kicked out with my back leg, striking one of the displays. I had to hope that it was enough. The blaring alarm that followed several antagonizing seconds later told me I had been right. The alarm system in the lobby was only truly activated when one of the pieces in the museum were threatened. The displays had counted towards that.
The alarms surprised poor Spiffy, who jumped in the air a bit before regaining his composure. I started galloping towards the front entrance. A massive gridded steel gate was being lowered into place slowly in front of the doors. I had to be quick. I dove forward, slamming through the glass of one of the paned doors and out onto the front steps. The metal gate fell closed with a final clang, preventing anything from getting out.
A ring of buckshot caught me by surprise. Spiffy stood before the gate, firing into it to try and hit me. Fortunately for me, he was a terrible shot.
“I told you all, this is the day you almost caught the Infamous Outlaw, Night Lock!” I shouted with glee. Without even listening to Spiffy's retort, I turned and started walking. My sides hurt like hell and the stump that had been my wing was throbbing too. I stopped briefly to take some Med-X, but I hadn't time to waste. I had to get the orb to...
Fuck, I thought. If Red Eye's group had sent the griffon, that meant they really weren't interested in paying me for the orb. I pulled the saddlebag out and looked into it. The orb still pulsated. I admit, I got lost in its warm light. For some strange reason, I wanted to keep it. I didn't want to sell it. If I could figure out out how to use it... I could be even richer!
I placed the orb back into my saddlebags and kept walking.
*******************************************
“So wait, that's it? You just kept walking,” Shot says as I finish my story.
“Yup. I gave up being a thief after that. A few more close calls and I realized that with only one wing, I couldn't do nearly as much as I had been able to do,” I say. “I found a town to be a guard at, and I've been doing that ever since.”
“But yet you did all those things without the wing in the story,” Shot replies flatly.
“Sure, but that's just adrenaline,” I say. “Does weird shit, I gotta tell you.”
“And this town you guarded? It wasn't this place. You've only been here a few months, tops,” Shot says.
I nod. “The last town I was in was attacked by raiders. I barely escaped.”
Shot narrows his gaze at me. I can tell he's scrutinizing my story. He doesn't have time to reply when a shot rings out in the distance. His binoculars come up and his eyes widen.
“You... you'd better see this,” he says.
I blink, taking a peek through the optics on my sniper rifle. The road is filled with them. Raiders, slavers, ghouls, you name it they are out there. Each one of them is armed to the teeth. At their head... a unicorn bandit wearing a perfectly cut prewar suit. Spiffy Fat Cash. He held a shotgun in his magic.
“Shit,” I mutter under my breath. “Shit shit shit! Not here too!”
“What do you mean, not here too?” Shot says. “We gotta warn the town!”
“Ain't no use,” I said. “We're already dead.”
“What the fuck does that mean?” Shot says.
I grimace, and reach down into my bags. I can feel it there. It's always there. Always hungry, waiting for the right time. I realized it after I'd come to the first town. The orb wants to be used. It wants its power to be used by others. In doing so, it calls out to others. It's how it managed to keep a group of ghouls enthralled with it's very presence. It's how they've always found me, cutting a swath of destruction across the Wasteland.
I pull out the orb, and Shot's eyes go wide instantly. The pulsating piece lights up the sniper tower.
“You... you kept it,” he says. “You fucking kept it, and they want it don't they? That's why the last town you were at was destroyed! You fucking asshole!”
“Yeah... I'm really sorry about this,” I say. “But I'm out of here. I can't let them have this. It's too powerful for anypony to try and use.”
I turn and head for the door leading down to the ground level. Strike Shot grabs me and tries to stop me, but I shrug him off and keep going. I make it out of the town just before the horde strikes. I gallop hard until the fires are tiny specks in the distance. I stop for a brief moment and sigh.
I've never told my story to anypony except for Strike Shot. Perhaps I should have taken him with me. I don't really know.
I turn back around and keep walking. I've got several days ahead of the horde to find a new place to live for a while. They'll never catch me, not while I still live and breathe.
For I am after all, the Infamous Outlaw... Night Lock.
Author's Note
Whee, this was actually kind of fun! I had a good time with this! This one was another one shot I wrote for my Patreon account, for a patron by the name of Cross_Wolf. He's a cool guy. Pretty awesome sauce.
His idea for me was something based on a FoE OC of his, Night Lock who was a thief who lost his wing and then became a guard. I tried my best to put a little twist on that concept. I hope he likes it.
Also, you’ll note that this fic also gives a fun little shout out to *another* patron of mine, Spiffy of #FOE fame. You gave me this idea, even if you don’t know it, so hope you enjoy it.
Thank you guys for the support and the fun ideas. Keep em coming! And don't forget to pledge!