Celestial Disposition

by Dany D

Rating: teen
Tags: Main 6, Princess Luna, Gore, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Sex, Adventure, Discord, Princess Celestia, Human
Length: 4512

What happens when you turn into Celestia in the middle of school? Government issues, magic, and- Oh, hey, it's Equestria!

One day, I become Princess Celestia in the middle of Lunch at school. A year of testing, spellcrafting, and preparing later, I end up in Equestria, thanks to Discord. Now, I get to meet Celestia, Luna, and others of Royal Company as I troll the shit out of everything. Maybe I'll learn some new tricks too.

Thanks to Blazing Archangel for pointing me to this picture. It fits perfectly!

Due to circumstances, this fic is no longer going to be updated since it was merged with Life as a Sonic OC Redux

Published 2014-09-14 00:10:05 UTC
Last updated 2019-09-28 01:53:38 UTC

Chapter 1: Transformation

Chapter 1: Bottling the Pain

“I’m not who you think I am.”

“Then who are you?”

“I'm just a human guy, trapped in a princess's body, thrown across the dimensional barrier.”

This was the exchange between me and Princess Luna in my dream. The only problem was, it wasn’t my voice. It was Celestia’s. Unfortunately, my inner alarm clock dispelled any chances of finding out just what was going on, so I tried to imagine the rest of the scene for the remaining ten minutes there were left before the actual alarm went off. Yet my misfortune streak continued, as I couldn’t settle on any direct lines of dialogue other than that already presented.

Not that it mattered. After all, it was just a dream, not some story I was writing. Either way, I still had to get out of bed, throw on my shoes, and get packed and ready for school. Fun fact: I go to a Robotics academy where they require you to have a laptop. Eeyup. I had to pack a laptop with me. As I survived another day at school, I found myself unable to think about much more than that dream. Eventually I started asking myself questions, like could it be real? Was there a hidden message there? It got to the point where I felt the need to share, but I never got the chance.

It was just near the end of lunch time when I decided to tell someone about my dream. I already had a headache from thinking about it too much, so I almost didn’t notice when my head started to pound. Just as I spotted someone who might care about what I had to say, I felt every molecule in my body ignite. The closest to this pain I can compare is standing in the very core of a blue sun. I had never felt such pain before, and it more than warranted the collapse and agonized screams that immediately followed. The worst of the pain was in my head, so that was the one part I tried to hold onto, as if it would make any difference.

I couldn’t tell who was around me, or what they were saying, but I knew my pain had attracted a worried crowd. I tried taking controlled breaths to help think through the agony, but then my bones started to reshape themselves. I brought the broken arm to my face, trembling, and when I saw my skin, my blood ran cold. It was pure marble white, and they were growing fur.

“No, no, no!!! Not here! I can’t be- GAH!” my hand snapped and popped, reshaping itself into what I knew all too well would be a hoof. I knew there was no point in denying it. I knew what I was becoming, and there was nothing that could be done about it. I could feel every bone in my body growing, shrinking, changing in ways I never even knew possible, and at some point I thought something had caused internal bleeding.

“WHY THE HELL COULDN’T THIS BE PAINLESS!?” I managed to shout through a slower part of the change, right before I grew wings. At this point, I was used to the pain, enough so that I was at least more aware of what the crowd was saying. I tried breathing like I did before to lessen the mind-numbing effects of the pain, and found that it really helped. Either that, or my body was finally nearing the end of its worst changes. I may have been in less pain, but I was quaking in my place on the ground, allowing tears to run freely down my still morphing face.

“Are you okay?” I heard a freshman ask. It was rather insensitive, but I understood where he was coming from. I think that would be the first question on my mind if this had happened to someone else. One of the teachers was about to scold the freshman for being so insensitive, but I raise a hand – err hoof now I guess – to stop her.

“No, i-it’s okay.” I told the teacher, a little off-put by my now feminine voice, but not surprised. I turned my attention to the freshman to answer his question, wiping the tears from my face and removing the tattered clothes from my oversized body. “I’ll live, but it’s not going to be easy adjusting.” I said, looking myself over as the pain finally left. The change was now complete. Remembering a number of fan fictions, and how they described quadrupedal movement, I made an attempt to get up. Thankfully it worked, but my knees were a bit weak. I wasn’t sure if I could take more than a few steps without collapsing. But some sense of respect willed me to uphold Celestia’s strong outer image, and I focused my willpower on staying steady and strong.

As I looked about the faces that witnessed my transformation, I saw many filled with shock and awe. I guessed they were surprised at how easily I took to this change, acting like it’d happened before, even how quickly I stopped crying. In all reality, I'd only read about a thousand fanfictions on the subject, so I knew what not to do, like panic and cause mass chaos. I'd read enough that it was almost as if I was prepared for an event like this happening. Although every day I think about it, I'm actually rather dumbfounded when I realize just how little time it took for me to recover. I think maybe a piece of Celestia's many centuries of emotional practice helped me on that one. But if I'd inherited her awesome emotional control, what else could have changed about me mentally?

“So… just what are you?” I heard someone say, interrupting my musings.. I turned to find a tomboyish girl had asked the question. I took the question as lightly as the one before, and gave my answer.

“I’m an Alicorn. A special mix of Pegasus and Unicorn.” I said, earning plenty of WTF faces among those who'd  never heard of such a thing. I was a bit relieved that so many people here knew, and were capable of explaining it.

“You’re going to need some rest and time to recover from that. It sounded like it hurt beyond mere words.” Someone said. It was one of the seniors. I smiled at him kindly, but rejected his statement.

“I’ll rest later when I return home. As it stands, I still have work to do.” I said. He and the teachers shot me incredulous looks, the rest of them just looked confused. I shot back a smirk, shaking off the rest of the pain and shock in doing so. “You didn’t think I’d let something like this stop me from getting my schoolwork done, did you? As long as I can still function and I’m still around, there is never an excuse for not completing assignments.”

I guess I now carried Celestia’s royal air, or something to that effect, because no one challenged my declaration. I was also starting to feel better, but for some reason I felt really stiff, like I’d just woken up from a long nap or something. Well, now’s as good a time to figure out how to work this body as any. I thought as I stretched my legs and loosened my neck. I even managed to flex my wings too, after working out how to move them in the first place. Of course I didn’t know the regular stretching exercises for ponies, but that didn’t matter much. I still felt better from that simple stretch.

Right about then, the bell rang for class. I was about to automatically head for the Game & Sim room, but the crowd didn’t go anywhere, and they were in my way. I chuckled a bit. “So are you people going to class, or am I going to have to try and fly over your heads?”

Some of them looked confused, but others looked at me in new awe. “But do you know how to fly?” someone asked. I shook my head, but kept my small smile.

“Only a little, but I have no practice in this alien body.” I replied. Many realized what that meant, and went on to go to class, effectively clearing my way. I smiled and trotted on without thinking too hard about how I was doing it, and ignoring the stares I got from anyone who didn’t see what happened to me. I quickly ducked into class before I caused too much chaos, and not really listening to a word others said about me. I didn't care if they knew who I was or not, I just wanted to get to class and avoid contact as much as possible. This teacher hadn’t witnessed what had happened out in the halls so when I trotted in, I almost got a spit-take to the face. I took a quick few steps back because getting hot coffee in Celestia’s mane wasn’t all that appealing.

“WHAT ON GOD’S GREEN EARTH!?” he practically shouted. I cringed, because my hearing was improved, and the volume he chose hurt.

“Um… I’m right here. You don’t have to shout.” I said calmly. Now if I were Pinkie Pie, I probably could have gotten away with shouting back, asking why we were shouting, but I wasn’t.

“You just…. You just talked…” He said, dumbfounded. I rolled my eyes. Of course he’d act like this. I’m a magical, winged, talking horse. You obviously don’t see one of those every day. But his shock got me thinking about the difference between his reaction, and that of the Academy students. Unlike my teacher, the students and some of the more friendly teachers knew the kinds of things I was into, to the point were it only came as a surprise that it actually happened. No doubt the pain I went through during the change had some impact on the students' reactions. I went to set up my laptop on one of the tables near an outlet. My teacher recognized my laptop.

“Where did you get that?” he demanded more than asked. I almost felt insulted because of the level of demand in his voice. I was royalty now, and he just demands something from me? I stopped myself from acting on that insult and instead replied to my clueless teacher.

“It’s mine.” I said simply, even as more students began entering the room. They had all seen my change, so they looked at me in sorrow rather than the shock I was getting from the teacher.

“No, that belongs to a student of mine.” He responded.

“You’re talking to him, Mr. Spence.” I said, while trying to figure out how to turn on my wireless moue with hooves. I figured now was a good time to figure out telekinesis. So I began testing my theories as I spoke with Mr. Spence.

“I… what? You mean to tell me that my student turned into a giant, talking, winged unicorn, just like that?” he asked.

“Didn’t you hear me screaming in agony out there?” I asked, going through my second theory, and moving on to the third. “Yes!” I cheered as my third theory worked. I basically just imagine my arms and hands grabbing it and picking it up. I used that to flick the switch and turn the mouse on. Setting it down, I looked at Mr. Spence. He was quite obviously in shock that an inanimate object moved on its own, and someone like me turned into something that wasn’t supposed to exist. A quick look around showed me that the other students were looking at me in awe. I couldn’t help but smile.

I managed to spend the rest of time in school in peace, not needing to leave the class room until the end of school. The academy was special like that. We ran on a different schedule than the regular school. Mr. Spence didn’t bother me for that time at all. Or anyone really. I think he was just having a hard time accepting that one of his students was breaking the laws of normality. Still, I was doing okay so far. After the last bell, I decided I’d get some flight practice in while I wait for the bus to arrive.

I went out to the bus loop and accidentally ran into the principal there. I facehooved because I forgot he always waits there, but figured it was probably for the better.

“What the heck? Princess Celestia?” Wait, what? My… my high school principal knew who I’d become? He was a Brony?! “What are you doing here?”

“Um… I’m not who you think I am.” I said.

“Then who are you? Because you look a heck of a lot like a certain Alicorn Princess.” He replied.

“I’m Jason.” I said. He froze.

“But… What happened?” He asked.

“A lot of pain, and other factors no one knows.” I replied, not wanting to revisit that particular memory so soon.

“So now you’re the Princess. How have you adjusted so far?” He asked.

“Well, I learned telekinesis, so that’s a plus. I was just about to practice flight, now I’m outside, but now I suppose I’ll need permission.”

“Oh, uh… sure. I don’t mind, as long as you don’t crash into anyone else.” He consented. I smiled at him as I trotted to a fairly open place. I flexed my wings a bit to get used to how they felt, and then I extended them. Then, I crouched, leapt into the air and started flapping. I was startled at how quickly and how high I launched myself, but I forced myself to remain calm. I began flapping regularly, just hovering where I was for about half a minute. Then I tried moving forward. I shot forward so fast, I thought I left a bit of my mane and tail behind. I had to stop myself and turn around, and this time, I flapped my wings a bit more gently. Thankfully, I managed to stay in the air the whole time.

I smiled at my quick learning, and decided I’d try a combination of flying and magic. I soared into the air, and began sky writing, first a T. I flew above it to check it, and it looked great. I finished the other two letters just the same, and then I descended to the ground. Looking back up, I smiled at my work, even if it was simple. TIA. That’s my name, from now on. I thought. I looked down as the principal called me.

“Jason, your bus is here!” he said, pointing to the one just rolling in.

“Thanks, but hey. Just call me Tia from now on. My name doesn’t fit me anymore.” I said. I’d have to spread the word tomorrow though.

“Alright, Tia. See you tomorrow.” He said, waving.

“You too.” I waved back, getting on the bus, or rather, trying my best to squeeze through the door. It was kinda low profile. I mean cars in the street didn’t see me unless they looked close. But I was still fully visible to everyone on the bus. Not that there weren't really all that many in the first place. My bus route went to the less populated area of my city, so really I could take up a few rows in the back seat. I decided to sit in the back so I didn’t distract the driver so much.

“What the heck is a horse doing on a bus?” I heard someone ask. I sighed. It was going to be a long trip home.

Chapter 2: Meet Celestia and Gamer Luna

Chapter 2: Astral Displacement

When I got home, I was half expecting the entire apartment complex to be overrun with kids, but evidently they all had better things to do. So I was okay to just rush into my house, because I wouldn’t be seen by anyone who hadn’t already seen me. However, before I opened the door to my house, I realized something important: my dad doesn’t know what happened to me. If I just walk in, and he sees me, he’ll freak out. I should have sent him a message first… Oh well. Too late for that now.

I trotted inside, preparing for the worst, but hoping for the best. What I found, I was not prepared for at all. My dad was in a wreck. He was crying quite openly. Now it takes a lot to break him like that, I know, so I’ve never seen him this bad. Whatever happened, I just hoped someone he loved didn’t die again. When I opened the door, he immediately looked at me.

“Jason…” He almost whispered. I guess he found out somehow.

“Dad…” I said, but it just didn’t sound right with Celestia’s voice. I was at a loss for words, too. I just didn’t know what to say. I thought he’d be the one to help me get through this when I got home and let loose the bottled up emotions. I was pretty good at bottling up emotions when the need arose, but it looked like I’d have to keep them hidden away until I helped dad through his depression.

I calmly walked up to my father, some kind of instinct driving me. It wasn’t just my connection to him as family, but something else too that drove me to want… no, need to help him.

“Jason… I saw the pain you went through… I saw what happened…” He said, tears free-falling to the floor. I gave him a strong hug to comfort him. I guess the event had been caught on video and uploaded to YouTube, and the school sent Dad an Email about it.

“It’s okay. I’m alive, and that’s all that counts. I’m still here, and I don’t plan on going anywhere anytime soon.” I told him. Even the sound of my voice seemed to calm him down.

“But… what about what happened to you? What are we going to do about it? How are we going to fix it?” Dad asked.

“None of that matters right now. Just remember that I’m not dead, and I’m still me.” I told him. I felt a bit of my own darker emotions lifting as I spoke to my dad. He didn’t say anything else, but just cried into my coat… a coat that was now as much a part of me as anything else I’d been given.

We spent a long time like that. It wasn’t until the sun went down that I realized my dad had fallen asleep. I chuckled a little, and taking my dad in my magical grip, I carried him to his bed where I lied him down and even lied the covers over him. I suddenly felt like a mother, doing this for him. The roles have been reversed. Funny, I never imagined I’d be playing the Mother’s role in this relationship.

I felt my own fatigue catch up to me then, and I knew I could finally get that rest I needed. I trotted off to my own room, and collapsed onto my bed. I was asleep within mere seconds of falling onto my bed.

***

“Discord, what happened?”

“Something attacked me. I don’t know how, but it stole my Chaos.”

“Stole your Chaos? I didn’t think that was possible.”

***

I was awoken by the feeling of unfamiliarity. I could tell somehow that I was no longer where I’d gone to sleep, maybe because of the ambient magic, maybe because I was far more comfortable, or maybe because I had some sort of sense for this kind of thing, either way, I knew I’d been moved. Thanks to years of conditioning, I could get up real quick without a single complaint. So that’s what I did when I felt the feeling of unfamiliarity. One instant of sight was all it took to conclude I wasn’t where I’d gone to sleep. I quickly looked around, trying to register where I was.

The room was mostly purple, like a cartoon night sky. There was a fireplace not that far from me, and a door just behind me. I was on something resembling a bean bag, but it was pretty flat, and functioned more like a bed. There was also a desk, on which lied a quill in ink, and lots of paper. Somehow, this place was familiar, but as I was still waking up, I just couldn’t wrap it around my head. I tried looking around for some clue as to where I was. My efforts were rewarded with a picture. On the desk, a picture sat, showing Celestia with her student Twilight, and her sister Luna. It took about 10 seconds to register what this meant.

“I’m… I’m in Celestia’s room!” I quietly exclaimed. My attention was drawn to a window, where I could hear someone groaning. I quickly got up to see who it was. When I got to the window, my breath caught in my throat.

“C-Celestia… what happened?” Celestia was lying collapsed in a heap on the balcony. She was obviously exhausted. She’d just done something huge, and whatever it was totally drained her.

“I couldn’t… close… the gate. I’m… sorry.” Celestia breathed. At least she was alive… Still, I had to do something. She obviously knew what was going on, but in her state, there was no way I was getting much info. Still, I had to try.

“You’re in really bad condition. What can I do to help?” I asked. I knew I had to help if I wanted anything more than what I got. What she said next caught me by surprise.

“Take my place… Act in my stead… and let me rest. That’s… all I need.” She replied. Her struggle to stay conscious was becoming more evident as she spoke. “Tell my sister… everything.”

And then nothing. She was gone. There wouldn’t be anything else from her for a long while, now. I gave a short, solemn bow, before lifting her with my magic, and bringing her to her bed. As I set her down, I reflected on her request. She wanted me to step up to the plate? Honestly, she must be going nuts or desperate if she’s asking someone else to take her place. Why would she ask someone else to be her?

I hardly had time to contemplate my questions, because no sooner did I set Celestia down, than a knock came from the door.

“Your Highness, I’ve brought you breakfast.” I heard someone say from outside. At the mention of breakfast, my stomach rumbled. I quietly giggled, and then went to answer the door. On the other side stood a servant with a plate of omelets and bacon-shaped hay balanced on her back. I smiled thankfully at her and accepted the plate.

“Thank you.” I said simply. I caught sight of Luna just down the hallway, and she saw me too. She smiled and waved at me. I smiled and waved back, mainly because I didn’t want the guards by the door to get suspicious. She was headed my way, too.

“Good morning, Tia.” She greeted happily.

“Good morning, Lulu.” I replied uncertainly. I wasn’t sure how the day played out for the Alicorn Sisters, but at some point, when I had a moment of privacy with Luna, I’d tell her what was going on. But until then, I’ll have to just play it cool.

“You know you seem well rested for somepony who’s worked on a big project overnight. Are you sure you didn’t just use that “project” as an excuse to go to bed early?” Luna asked. I couldn’t tell if it was suspicion or playfulness in her voice, but either way, the question surprised me. It was a good thing I hadn’t already taken a bite of my omelet, or I would have choked. Thankfully, I didn’t have to answer. She moved on to another question that surprised me more. “So, what’s with that bag?”

Wait, WHAT?! I almost gave myself whiplash with how quickly I looked at the bag hanging by my side. It was my laptop bag! I’d forgotten it entirely when I was comforting my dad yesterday! Unfortunately, I did have to answer this question. So I spit out the first lie that came to my mind.

“Oh, it holds a device relevant to my uh… project.” I said rather hastily. Then I realized just how many ways that lie could go wrong. Now I was going to have to show her the laptop and act like an amateur in handling it. I just hope sharing information about it will be enough to distract her from the relevance of whatever project Celestia had been doing… “It’s quite interesting. It seems to run on electricity rather than magic.”

“Oh? What is it?” Luna asked curiously. I lifted it out of the bag and showed it to her.

“It might be called a laptop, based on a few pop-up messages, though it might also be called an Acer. I’ve discovered it used massive amounts of data to run multiple “programs” at a given time, though the more it runs at one time, the slower the whole system runs.” I said. I opened it and pressed the spacebar to wake it up. I entered the password and only just managed to avoid acting awkward when my Rainbow Dash wallpaper showed up. Luna was watching me operate this alien machine with rapt interest. I looked immediately at the Network icon and I was not very surprised that there was no connection. However, I was surprised when a second later, it picked up on my home network. What the heck?! But… how is that possible?! The network’s in a whole other dimension! I shouldn’t be able to reach it! Unless…

“Tia, what is all of this?” Luna interrupted my mental tirade. Right, I still had to distract her with information. Wait, Celestia asked me to tell Luna about what happened to her. I didn’t want anyone else but Luna to hear, and what I was showing her on the laptop was a perfect excuse to invite her into Celestia’s room. I nearly beamed with joy as I set my plan into motion.

“Hey why don’t I show you more in here?” I asked, moving slightly back through the door. Luna smiled and almost accepted, but then one of the royal guard came tearing down the halls.

“Princesses!” He shouted. I closed and put away the laptop. I could already tell it was going to be a long day before I could tell Luna about the Event.

“Princesses! Discord just showed up and said he needed to speak with you two!” the guard said. Luna immediately turned towards me, but I was still looking at the guard.

“Lead the way." I demanded firmly. I had the feeling last night's dream was about to come true.

Chapter 3: Remodeled

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Chapter 4: Trollestia "Plays" with Blueblood

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Chapter 5: Meet the Mane 6

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Chapter 6: First Strike Gone Wrong

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Chapter 7: Of Nightmares and Super Saiyans

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Interlude: Why me?

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Chapter 8: It's Skurrin Time!

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Interlude: So are we Dating?

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Chapter 9: Make a Badass Out of You

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Interlude: I'm Better, I Swear!

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