The oppressing heat of the room weighed down on me, forcing me forwards and into my hands. In a shitty, plastic seat in the reception area I heard the quiet thumps of feet on the tile floor and the murmur of questions being thrown around. "What did she look like?" and "Do you know where she may have gone?" were commonplace here in the heat, but the ones that really dug into me seemed to be spoken louder than the others. "Has she acted suspicious before?", "How well did you know her?", and "Do you think she was a spy?" made my fingernails dig deeper into my scalp, threatening to draw forbidden blood.

"Can you believe this?" I overheard one guard whisper to another. "Not even a week after we learn about this guy, and already someone's gone and done something crazy." The clinking of armour and a sigh. "I dunno if we should even bother at this point. I heard the lieutenant say that whoever this bird was, she was in deep. Weaseled her way right into the Ministry of Health and kept tabs on important tech and advancements that were made. Breaker told me that her apartment was going to be a treasure-trove, but it was an inferno when they got there."

My ears dulled their conversation out. I didn't want to believe it, but here it was right in front of me. Sylvia— if that was even her real name —was a spy for the Gyphon Empire, seeded deep into the medical scene way before I had even gotten to Canterlot, or even Equestia for that matter. At least, this was the most likely outcome in my head as I sat there stewing in my contempt and misery. Nobody could ever know for sure now. She was gone— erased from the board in a moment's notice.

A firm grasp held my shoulder as I contemplated every conversation, every cup of coffee, every moment I had ever had with Sylvia. I rotated my head to find I.V. of all people sitting next to me. He gave a sort of reassuring smile, but he looked just as tired as everyone else. "Wild day, huh?" he chuckled weakly. "The real important ponies really just attract trouble. I thought it was a myth."

I gave an exasperated sigh and leant back in the sparsely padded chair. "Tell me about it," I groaned as I felt my muscles burn and joints shriek. "I thought I'd avoid this shit when I moved here, but it seems like once you've lived in Ponyville it follows you everywhere."

I.V. let out a sudden laugh of amusement. "Oh yea! I forgot you used to live there!" He gave a little laugh with wonder in his breath. "Man, must be pretty fucked up there. I mean, after everything that's happened: Discord, Tirek, and I'm sure there's plenty more to come!"

A wave of nostalgia hit me as my bones began to cool off from the strain of the day. "Yea, I guess you could say that. It's nice at times, though. Quiet, too." I remembered the lush green fields near the Everfree, the crawling wisps of cloud in the blue sky, the breeze that could calm even the most heated of person. "I kind of miss it," I admitted quietly.

"Ah, so even after all that, it's pretty good, huh?" I.V. mused, now joining me in slumping back in his chair. "You can only imagine the backbone on those ponies there. Picking themselves up after each sudden fall, only to come back stronger."

"That's were you were going with this?" I laughed weakly in amusement. "Fuck off, I.V., you know I'm fine. It was just really fucking sudden."

"Ah," he said in mock surprise, "the "I'm fine" response. How enlightening. It definitely isn't something people say when they're hiding what they really feel." I smacked him lightly in the arm, raising a chuckle from him. "Carter, I know you're not fine because I'm not fine. Everything seems so fucked up now: Cross cried in front of me for the first time in years, you look like you just went toe to toe with a minotaur for several hours, the whole hospital is covered in guards and we can't leave until they say it's okay to."

I looked far past the walls of the hospital, far into the reaches of space as I thought about what he said. "Cross... cried?" I asked in honest disbelief.

"Yea," he admitted solemnly, "and not even the stern, suppressed crying either. Like, ugly crying."

"That's..." I couldn't put into words how I felt. Cross was a strong mare, stronger than anyone in the hospital. She would be the one consoling the families of those who didn't make it. For her to cry like that... Sylvia must have meant a lot to her. "That's awful."

"Yea."

We both sat there as the guards processed more and more staff and patients, slowly melting into our seats from the heat. How did I feel? I.V. was right: I definitely wasn't fine, but the more I thought about it, the more it felt like I didn't feel anything. It was just was what it was. It was like I didn't care that this was happening, or that Cross was crying, or that I.V. was sitting next to me.

"You know," I said suddenly, startling the both of us, "I used to be homeless."

"Really?" came I.V., looking honestly surprised. "Back in your world?"

"No," I laughed pitifully, "it was here in Equestria. Back in Ponyville. When I came here, it was really sudden and nobody really knew what to do with me. I just slept in my office and nobody ever seemed to notice. I think some people were happy about it, honestly. It meant that I was always around for the night shift if something went wrong. Soon enough, people just... forgot. It was commonplace after the first month or so.

"And I mean, I was completely fine with it! I'd wash in the showers in the hospital, wash my clothes at the laundromat, and spend my off hours out on the town. I'd even walk out in the middle of the night— and I mean like one or two A.M. middle of the night. Those walks were... magical to me, man. Back in my world, you can't see the stars from cities anymore, but at night in Ponyville... I remember just laying out in a grassy field and looking out into into the sky and think about how different everything was.

"I remember how alone I felt in those moments. Like, I mean yea, I had friends— AJ would come with me and camp out underneath the stars some nights. We'd make a bonfire and talk about things: her family, her friends, and I'd fuck with her and pester her about a boyfriend— or coltfriend, or whatever you wanna call them. But... every time she would ask about me, I just deflected the question and laugh it off. I didn't want to bum her out by telling her how isolated I felt at the time.

"I think... I think that's what I feel like right now," I admitted solemnly, "like I did back then. Like I'm staring up at the starry sky and thinking that no matter how hard I wish, or try, or whatever, from the moment I got here I was "the human" underneath everything else that made me, me. That I'll always be alone in one way."

The silence was reason enough to look at I.V., but even then I didn't. I was too lost back in time in that field with AJ to care. "Dude..." I.V. breathed, unsure of what to say. "I... I had no idea."

"I mean to be fair," I laughed a little, "I don't think anyone on this planet can have an idea what it's like. Except maybe Discord, but he doesn't really talk about himself or his kind that much." I took a breath, but it came out as an exhausted sigh. "Yea, I'm going to miss those nights. Something about the stars makes me feel small, or like I could just fall off the world at any moment. Not a good feeling, but for some reason I remember it with fondness."

I.V. took his time coming up with his next words. "Maybe," he began cautiously, "maybe because it was normal? Like maybe you felt like you were back home?"

I thought about his carefully picked words to see if there was any truth to them. "Yea," I confirmed after a minute of silence. "That's exactly how it is."

I was in the garden when Celestia caught me after court. There was no doubt she had heard what happened at the hospital, and there was no doubt that she would be worried about me. She caught me kneeling next to some of her personal patch in the garden: a place she had reserved for her own flowers, or whatever she felt like planting. There was no telling what I was doing, because I wasn't even sure myself.

Jogging up to me in her daily dress and jewelry she wore during court, she stopped and hesitated speaking when she saw me playing in the dirt. "Carter?" she ventured, gaining my attention. "What... what are you doing?"

"Gardening," I stated simply as I parted the soil with my fingers, "I think. I'm not really sure what the hell I'm doing." I reached over to the flower I had bought on my way here and brought it out of it's plastic shell. Celestia knelt next to me as I slowly placed the plant into the hole and covered it with the loose soil. "I think that's right..." I mused, wiping my forehead with my wrist.

I turned to Tia with an exhausted smile, making her slowly begin to chuckle. "You've smudged dirt all over your face!" she laughed as she licked her thumb and tried to get it off. "Honestly... you're all about sterilization in your profession. How can you get so dirty?"

"Says the mare who pinned me to the bed and—" Tia's eyes widened and her cheeks flushed as she put her hands over my mouth. I gave her palm a lick and she reeled back in playful shock, laughing before smearing it over my face. Joining in on her mirth, I fell to my bottom and looked up at the evening sky. A sigh escaped me, sounding as tired as I was after Tirek had wrought havoc in Ponyville. "It's been one of those days. I mean, pretty much everything went wrong."

I turned to Celestia and opened my mouth to apologize for letting the blood slip away, but she read me like a book and covered my trap with a finger. "It's not your fault, Carter. It never was, nor will it ever be," she comforted quietly, releasing her hold over my lips. "I've already looked into the matter, so don't worry about it. You just need to focus on what you need to do. Like... gardening apparently?"

"I thought it might be nice to share a hobby," I admitted, looking away in embarrassment. "Get as much time in as possible together doing the things we love before... you know."

Tia instinctively opened her mouth to say something about my inevitable demise, but stopped herself and adopted a look of understanding. "Yes, I think that would be nice," she agreed with a sad smile.

There was silence after that. We both leaned into one another and looked up as the sky went from orange, to red, to blue. When the stars came out, I felt at peace being small and insignificant. I pressed my cheek up against Tia's, and when she turned to look at me, I gave her a peck on the lips.

"C'mon," I said as I stood suddenly. "I haven't eaten since this morning. Let's go get some cake."

"Cake?" she laughed as I helped her off of the grass. "Why cake? Not that I'm complaining or anything!"

"I mean, I've been overdue for that birthday I missed, so why the hell not?" I explained as I began to wipe the loose dirt off of my clothes. "It's been one of those days after all. I could really go and drown myself in sugar right now."

Celestia gave a soft smile as she suddenly came in for a hug. It startled me, but I gave into the hug nevertheless. The softness of her fur was a comfort to my aching skin, and the warmth of her body held me up for the rest of the night. When she parted, she flushed and looked away. "I've missed spending time with you," she admitted. "It was getting kind of boring around here."

I returned the smile when she finally brought her eyes back to mine. "Yea. I missed this too."

Okay, maybe I was wrong about the drowning in sugar thing, I thought to myself as I made my way through the streets back to my apartment. It was the dead of night, and there weren't many ponies around as I wandered down the main street. The ones that were dressed obviously: neon-dyed hair and piercings all over their bodies, or dressed for easy movement on the dance floor. They were most likely going to one club or another, but it didn't really matter.

I had been walking for twenty minutes— I didn't live that far away from the castle, but not too close either. Upon seeing the night life alive in this city, I didn't take much notice of most walking down the alleys or hiding private acts in the shadows of the night. It wasn't until later as I was nearing my house that I noticed a figure walking the same direction as me. They wore a grey hoodie with the hood pulled so tight that I couldn't even see what race they were.

They were ahead of me by about a block, and turned down the street where I lived. Something was off about the way they moved: slow and methodical, yet with an air of anxiety about each stride. I followed as I would have anyways, and stopped at the corner of the intersection. Hiding behind the shop corner there, I peered around to spy the hooded figure walking up to the building that I lived. They stopped, and looked up to the many windows that lined the street.

It was a good five minutes before the figure looked back down and stood completely still. Instead of entering the building or doing something unexpected, the figure seemed to slouch as if sighing. It then pulled something out of it's pocket and took a good, long look at it before putting it back and resuming on it's way down the road.

I saw the yellow talons against the night sky, and had a pretty good feeling I knew who it was.

Author's Note

OoOoOoOOoOOOOooOooooooOOOOOoOooOoOoOOOoOoOooooOoooOOOOoooOoOo

The mystery deepens!

But yea, character development.
Let me know what you think down below.