Dead on the inside

On a late but calm evening, a lone man sat in a hospital's corridors. Not exactly the place for smiles, but the man was smiling, nevertheless...Worried, nervous and sweaty, but happy, still. His eyes were covered by dark sunglasses, but they could not hide his joy. He sat right in front of the door from which he was expecting a nurse to come through any moment and deliver great or even greater news. His wait was nearly at an end.

The sound of the door opening lifted his head sky-high and doubled the wideness of his smile...The nurse's expression, however, did not bring joy. The man didn’t pay much attention to that at the moment and asked right away, "So?...Is it a boy or a girl?”

The man's excitement rapidly faded with each second the nurse lingered on her answer. Only a shade of a grin remained in the corner of his lips when the nurse finally spoke up. "I’m sorry, Sir...I'm afraid your wife isn’t doing too well...”

Whatever was still left from a smile had faded from the man's face entirely now. "W-what do you mean?"

The nurse sounded rather unconfident for a moment. "Sir...uhm...I-I don't know how put this..."

"Just give it to me straight, please! Don't keep me in the dark!"

The man's tone gave the nurse the confidence she needed to finally speak up. "Sir, as much as it pains me, it is my duty to inform you that..." She paused one final time as her expression grew ever more grim. "You're going to have to make very painful decision..."

A brief moment of silence struck the room. Only the noises coming from inside the operation room were the only sounds even remotely close to the corridor with the man and the nurse. The heart rate monitor beeping, the doctors discussing something that could not be heard properly from their angle, and of course, the moaning maiden on the table.

The man hung his head ever so low...He already knew exactly what choice was the nurse talking about. "I...see...” the man whispered, engulfed by his self-scolding inner thoughts. I knew she wasn’t ready for this...Why, oh why did I make her go through with this? Inhio, you idiot!

"Sir?...”

The nurse's voice rang through his ears like a church bell and cleared his mind of the unwelcome thoughts...Despite the long pause, he did not need much time to realize just what answer he wants to give. "Her...Her, of course! My wife!” Inhio got up from his chair as he spoke up and walked closer to the nurse. His words, undeniable and clear as day, left the nurse a bit confused.

"Sir? A-are you sure? I was only about to just state the choice I mentioned, but you’ve already...”

The nurse's loud speech got cut short by a voice three times as loud and fierce. "As sure as the moon that watches over us in this dark night and as clear as the seven seas...Yes!...The only thing I’m not sure about is raising a child that came into this world through the death of my other half!”

Inhio stepped closer and closer to the nurse as he spoke, up to the point where another step taken would’ve led to stepping on her feet. The nurse backed up a bit, avoiding the frustrated man, and although she was a bit scared of his tone, she more than understood his attitude. "Yes, Sir.” The nurse obediently walked back into the room to give the verdict to the doctors who had already begun the process to extract the dead fetus from Inhio's wife without waiting for the nurse. It’s no wonder they had heard the decision from Inhio's own mouth. For all they knew, half the hospital did.

Inhio slowly walked up to the window of the operation room, took off his shades and looked upon his saddened and weakened wife. As she turned her head to look back at him, a waterfall of tears rained down upon the ground...It was unclear whether her expression meant "I’m sorry!” or "How could you?”

Inhio lifted his hand up to the window and placed his palm against it, still maintaining eye-contact with his wife, Angela. For a brief moment, he lowered his head and pushed his forehead against the window and gripped his hand into a half-fist position. He then raised his head again and restored eye contact, after which he opened his gripped hand and drew a heart-shaped figure on the window.

Angela knew Inhio inside-out and perfectly understood each of his motions. In the order as they were, they meant "I’m with you.”, "I feel your pain.”, and as for the last three words...Lets just say that they didn’t even need any additional explaining.

Despite Angela's expression carrying nothing but misery and agony, Inhio found comfort inside himself. For his love for her was undying. As insanely outrageous as it may sound, he’d use his own two hands to strangle this and a dozen other babies just to see his wife still breathing...even if it meant not being there to breathe by her side.

***

The couple left the hospital in Inhio's car, early on the next morning. Angela needed a lot of rest after the horrid evening, and Inhio gladly waited for her, all night. She still had little strength left after the night and didn’t feel much like talking, and the man didn’t feel much like bothering her either.

Unfortunately for the couple, all the parking spots near their house were filled, so they had to park a good bit from home and walk through a not-so-safe neighbourhood. Inhio held his wife strongly by his side as he walked her home, hoping that they wouldn’t run into any trouble along the way...Alas, trouble found its way to them.

A crowd of dangerous-looking people crossed their path. Inhio wasn’t really a fighter, nor would he feel much like fighting, even if he was, not while his wife needs him, more than ever. Naturally, he tried to resolve this conflict through words...but it wasn’t long before both of them realized that words were of no use here.

"Please! For the love of decency, she needs help! Just let me take her home, first...” He resorted to begging, but not even that helped. Inhio threw himself towards the bandits in a desperate attempt to hold them back, or at least keep them away from his wife until help arrives. Sadly, it wasn’t long before he found himself beaten and lying on the ground, only able to watch over as the bastards moved closer and closer to his wife.

The people here were the very embodiment of evil, that became clear to Inhio when he saw their leader pull out a knife while approaching his wife. "Oi, hero! Keep yer head up, eh? Wouldn’t wanna miss out on the show, now, would ya?” their leader taunted the man in a mocking tone.

Feeling helpless, Inhio did the only thing he could. He crawled towards the man holding the knife and silently prayed to the god he never believed existed. He didn’t rely much on god, he was just hoping to claw at the bandit's leg in a desperate attempt to keep his wife alive for as long as he could.

The cruel man laughed wickedly as he raised his arm and swung his knife towards the trembling woman who had already begun to faint from too much stress.

His fun, however, was cut short. The man's arm stopped in midair, and his face froze in shock from the sight he just witnessed. The beaten man who was far away from him and was still barely crawling just seconds ago, was now standing proudly and holding his arm so firmly that he could not move it right or left.

The bandit , still a bit dazed from the sudden shock, added another taunt as readied his free arm for a blow. "Oi, lads, would ya look at this, now. We got ourselves a true family man here! Ha ha ha ha ha!”

Inhio didn’t budge. He ignored the bandit's laugh entirely. It was as though he was no longer himself, for the moment, but a force of pure light, here to purge the unjust. His will to defend his wife to the death woke up strength the likes of which he had never felt before.

"Seems like this one has some trouble staying down!” As the bandit launched his free arm towards Inhio's sides with all his might, he ended up being the one taking a heavy blow to the ribs, instead.

The man moaned in pain. The powerful blow forced him to bend. A single hit so vigorous was enough for him to yield the fight, he would probably do so too, if he could only find the strength to breathe. Unfortunately for him, Inhio was not done with him, and before he could realize what was going on, another blow sent him flying through the air and landed him unconscious at the feet of his gang.

The gang first stared at their fallen leader, but soon turned their attention to the man that dealt the blow, right after hearing a small, black, plastic object drop to the ground. Inhio's eyes were exposed as he stared back at the criminals and shouted "Leave!" Whether it was the one hit KO, or the man’s burning gaze, it did not matter. The cowardly dogs fled like hens from a butcher's cleaver.

After calming himself, Inhio looked at his own hands, and then at the unconscious bandit, still barely believing what had just happened, himself. He would stay and ponder on this question for longer, but he had his priorities sorted. He picked up his shades and walked up to his passed out wife. He picked her up gently in his arms and carried her home.

He Carried her up the stair case and put her in bed, and the only words he said to her since she walked out of that hospital came now, and those were just an offering for a glass of water. She didn’t seem to recall anything of what had happened on the street, just minutes ago, so Inhio decided to not bring it up. Besides, he probably wouldn’t be able to explain even half of it, anyways.

He sat and watched over her for hours. Seeing her unable to get some proper rest hurt him, and every time she turned to try and find a more comfortable position, Inhio felt a spike impaling his heart. After a couple hours of the same grim situation, Angela switched to sitting on the bed and quietly asked if he’s mad, to which Inhio replied without much thinking, "At myself...or the baby? At the man who was responsible for putting you in this painful state, altogether, or the thing that tried to take your life for a chance to walk the Earth?”

A question that sounded so full of sarcasm could only sound like the clean truth to someone who really knew Inhio...he’d never joke like that. "After all that...” Angela burst into tears in the middle of her sentence. "You still try to pin all the blame on no one but yourself...”

She covered her eyes as she wept loudly. Inhio didn’t hesitate to rush over and wrap his arms around her. "And who else should I blame?”

With the way she cried, it was difficult for her to keep a sentence uninterrupted "Me...you know damn well...that I wanted that baby more than anything...you can’t tell me you’ve forgotten how I practically begged for it...I...” She took her hands off of her face to look upon her husband as she finished. "I’m the only one to be truly held responsible for this mess, and you know it!...Me and my...”

"Hush!" he interrupted her. "Rest now...you’ve had a long day...try not to think about it.” Inhio calmed her as best he could. He hushed her and held her tightly in his arms, and she soon responded with a hug just as tight.

***

The couple recovered seemingly soon enough, and had their life back on their feet. They tried as best they could to forget that fateful day. Although they never spoke of it, the thoughts were still always there...such deep wounds don’t heal so easily.

Inhio still regretted his decision ever so dearly, and he never stopped blaming himself for putting his wife through so much pain. Nevertheless, he was still ever so glad that it was all behind him and would never happen again...or so he though.

In one early autumn morning, half a year after the incident, the couple found themselves in a position similar to the one nine months before the painful day.

"No! I will not let you go through this again!” Inhio had to resort to yelling at the one person he’d protect until the day his bones began to rust. He calmed himself, sat down and continued in a quieter voice. "I’m sorry...Mayhap you have recovered from that day, but it seems that I still haven't...”

Angela sat down next to him and put her arm on his shoulder. Inhio turned towards her and looked her in the eyes before speaking again. "Seeing you in that state...that...I...I’m not sure I could go through with that again...I...I just don’t...” He hung his head and covered the sides of his head with his hands.

His wife slowly leaned on him and whispered in his ear, "I’ll be fine. I know it, this time. Please, I need you to trust me on this.” She put her arm on his cheek and turned his face towards her own. "Do you not trust me?”

"I do...I always have.”

The tides had turned...this time it was the woman that smiled while the other was frowning. "Then prove it.”

Inhio cursed himself a thousand times before agreeing...with a face about as happy as that of a boy who had just lost his hamster, he replied. "Only if you prove it back.”

"W-what do you mean?” Angela was slightly confused about the reply. Inhio then got off the bed and got down on his knees and grabbed her hands and held them firmly as he asked, "I want you to promise...no...I want you to swear to me...”

"Anything, my love! Just say the word!” She answered his grip by also holding his arms tightly.

"Swear to me...that if the event from half a year ago repeats itself...”

"It won’t!” with a fierce shout, Angela interrupted.

"If" He placed a special emphasis on that one word. He also hoped that it wouldn't happen again, but he had to be sure. "If it does...I want you to swear one thing to me...do you remember how the last time they made me make the decision between you an the baby?”

Angela paused a bit, not sure about where this was heading.

"I just want to be sure, that if the past repeats itself, and this time, it’s you, instead of me making that choice, for some reason...I want you to swear to me that you will save your own life instead of the child’s.”

Angela didn’t want to keep the man waiting, so she gave her reply after just a short moment of thought.

"I swear.”