M235

It’s been a while since I opened you up. I got you back when my sister and I were in Canterlot a looooongg time ago. She told me I could get you if I was actually going to use you.

I’m so glad I said sure, even though I hate how I sounded. My voice cracked even harder back then.

Now I can talk to you, because, well, I guess you will just understand me more. I don’t think sis’ has gone through something like this before. So… I don’t know where to start but I guess the best place is at the beginning.

So, Scootaloo, Apple Bloom and I were walking to the Cutie Mark Crusaders Clubhouse. It’s been a while since we had a meeting there, because, well… stuff was going on, and we didn’t want to worry everypony else at the time since everything was so… eh, that didn’t matter! The point was that we hadn’t been there in a while and we wanted to meet at the clubhouse. So, with just the three of us, we were walking down there and chatting about all this stuff when suddenly, we hear a faint crashing noise.

At first, we just chalked it up as nothing and kept on walking, but as we got closer to the clubhouse, the noise got louder.

And then…

I screamed. No, wait, we all screamed.

We all watched helplessly as the tree that held our clubhouse fell in a fiery mess.

Everything was just too much at that point. Thoughts were just coming and going. What was I going to do? How was this going to be fixed? Rarity was going to be so mad.

But that was the least of our problems. With all those thoughts going on, I let myself look around and… I caught my eye on something that caused all this.

And all my worries about the clubhouse were gone.

It… was tall, white, and had this long blonde mane. But what little fur was left on it was spotted in black and white rocks. There was…

My stomach is churning just thinking about all this.

One second.

~~I can write this down without wanting to throw up.~~

~~I’m sorry.~~

~~I’m better.~~

I haven’t been better but I think I can continue. There was a lot of… blood. And there was pieces of metal everywhere. What it once was I don’t know. There was just pipes and… tires and lot of random stuff.

But none of that mattered to what was dying in front of me. At first, I was frozen, not knowing what to do, but I knew I had to do something. So I took a breather, turned to the girls and told them to get help as fast as they could, while I tried to… do something with whatever this thing was. I needed to help it somehow. I was tired of being ignored. I was tired of being so… useless.

I wanted to feel like I was worth it, so I needed to help this… whatever it was. It had these hands like Spike only his looked less sharp—or maybe they should be because the fire might’ve…

I don’t want to think about it.

~~My stomach hurts.~~

I think I need to take a break. I can’t write all this down without wanting to cry or throw up.

I’m sorry. I’ll tell you more about that at another time. Point is that this happened and it has made me really, really upset, because I don’t know if this… thing will make it. I really need to figure out who this pony is—this isn’t a pony but whatever this thing is, I need to know.

I need to know so I can sleep better. I’m tired of waking up in a cold sweat. I’m tired of feeling trapped.

I just want to have things go my way for once.