Luna gets stoned and eats all of Celestia’s cakes
"Tia! Your cakes are delicious!"
Dear Princess Celestia:
Applejack, Fluttershy, and I returned this afternoon from an excursion to the Everfree Forest. Applejack wanted to find some safe herbs to try an experimental herb-garden back at the barn, and since I know a couple of plants from my time with Zecora, she figured I should tag along.
Fluttershy decided, since we weren’t going too far in, to come with us and see if there were any of her animal friends who needed anything.
We spent a good couple of hours looking around, and Applejack got a couple herbs she could use.
However, we found something peculiar: In a glade a ways in, there were a number of rather beautiful herbs growing with pretty little white-mauve flowers. I’ve never seen this particular type, so I picked a couple of the plants to bring back; I’m happy I decided to bring a specimen glass along with me.
We decided to make a quick detour to Zecora’s, to see if she knows this variety of herb; however, she wasn’t home, and a notice on her door said she’d be gone a few days.
Since I knew we’d miss the afternoon train to Canterlot by the time we got back to Ponyville, I decided to keep the plants on ice overnight and send it out to you first thing in the morning. You’ll probably receive it before Zecora gets back, and anyway, it’s nice to send something for study other than a magic or friendship report this time.
I hope you like the flower.
Your faithful student,
Twilight Sparkle
Celestia walked slowly through the halls of Canterlot Castle. It was late afternoon, and she had finally completed most of the tasks set for her that day.
She had a small smile on her face as she entered the kitchens.
“Cook!” she called brightly.
“Princess!” came the reply, muffled.
“I’d like a tea-service sent to my chambers, and a selection of your fresh cakes; the small ones you were set to make today. They sound delightful.”
The cook emerged from a back room, his face troubled. “Ah, Princess.” He bowed quickly. “Um…”
Celestia cocked her head. “What troubles you, Cook?”
“Ah, well, you see… Princess Luna… um, she… confiscated all the cakes.”
Celestia blinked. “Luna… confiscated the cakes?”
“All of the cakes.”
Celestia shook her head, her smile back. “Surely,” she said with a laugh in her voice, “you don’t mean a—”
“Forgive me, Princess, but she took all of the cakes. All of them. Every single one.”
Celestia’s eyes closed for several seconds before they opened again. “Whence were the cakes delivered?”
“She asked them to be sent to your chambers, Highness.”
Celestia tilted her head again, thoughtful. “She is making a jest, surely,” she said, calmly.
The Cook fidgeted, an unsure smile on his face. “Perhaps.”
Celestia smiled softly. “Perhaps that is all it is. No fear, Cook; I will see to Luna. Send up my tea when it is ready.”
The Cook bowed again, relieved, and Celestia turned and exited the kitchens, heading up to her chambers.
Celestia stood in the doorway to her chambers, her face aghast. She counted the remains of at least four large cakes on her end-tables, detritus from three more middle-sized cakes on the floor, and remnants at least a dozen hoof-sized mini-cakes scattered about her bed, with at least another dozen ready to be eaten.
And on her bed—
“Luna!” she shouted.
The mare in question was upside down, her head facing the door, her hind legs propped on pillows, her wings spread.
Luna chuckled with great glee. “Tia! Thou art here! Where there are cakes, there so is Tia!” She giggled.
“Luna,” Celestia said sternly, walking into the room and shutting the door with magic, “care to explain?”
“Well, dearest sister, ‘tis an amusing story,” Luna replied. She flipped a mini-cake in her hoof to the air, caught it, and flipped it again.
“Hee, hee, hee… Tia, thy student Swirly Sparkle… she sent you a letter, and this most delightful herb… Something she picked up in the Forest… Wanted to show it to you, I think… maybe… Where was that letter…? Maybe in… HERE!”
She flipped another tiny cake into her mouth, chewing. She giggled. “Nope! Not in that one.
“Too bad, Sparkly Sparkle was most curious about this herb, but with her friend—wassername, Zecky? Becky? Zecooly? The weird one who lives deep in the forest—hey, we used to live deep in the Forest! Hahaha, you’re weird, Tia!”
Luna stuck out her tongue, waving her hooves by her ears.
“Well, I came looking for you—you know, Cook had these lovely little cakes ready—Oh, my, I’ve eaten all your cakes! Hahaha, normal day for you, is it not, Tia?”
Celestia snorted, a slight frown marring her brow.
“Well, I came to tell you all about the cakes, but you were soooo busy with Court, so I waited here. And you know, I smelled something delicious! So I looked, and I found that letter, and I kept smelling something, so I looked, and there was this pretty little flower like a cuuute little star, like that cute little filly Sparkle-Sparkle, and I just wanted to try it, it smelled good.
“So I did, and oooh it made me all tingly, and I WANTED CAKE!”
The Royal Canterlot Voice of the Night’s Princess washed over Celestia. She closed her eyes until it faded. Luna had flipped over, a big cake-eating grin plastered across her face.
Celestia opened her eyes, made a single, precise eyeroll, and dropped her head with a sigh.
My faithful student, Twilight Sparkle:
I believe the herb you sent to me for study is a particular variety of the “Starflower”. In fact, if my botanical reference is correct, this is known as the “Aromatic Starflower”.
I trust you find the name apt, but there’s more to it than that: Aromatic Starflower grows amid damp, dark groves, with little sun but plentiful moon-light and star-light. They were used as therapeutic and healing agents among Tribal and Classical-era ponies, but such usage was discontinued several centuries past given the uncomfortable side effects of long-term usage, not to mention short-t—
I apologize; Luna… ate your herb, and she’s been acting strangely since. I’m trying to keep an eye on her as I write this, and I have yet to lower the sun fully for night. Luna has devolved to a level of silliness I have not seen since we were foals, and has gained an enormous appetite for sweets.
…as in… well…
…she’s eaten all my cakes.
Especially the tiny, delicious, hoof-sized ones…
Your distraught Princess,
Celestia
In Ponyville, within the quiet, seemingly-perpetual dusk filtering into Golden Oaks Library, Twilight Sparkle sat in the waning light and finished reading the message Princess Celestia had sent her, and performed a single, well-practiced facehoof.
Author's Note
The idea for the herb ingested by Luna is a combination of cannabis (of course) for the effect, and the Trientalis or "starflower" family of plants because I wanted a pretty flower.
So far as I know, there is no "Aromatic Starflower", nor are Trientalis herbs particularly affective in the manner of marijuana.