//-------------------------------------------------------// Twilight slowly reads a book -by Michael Hudson- //-------------------------------------------------------// //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 4 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 4 She opened the book and her eyes scanned the page. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 5 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 5 Page after page passed and her eyelids grew heavy as the hours sinked by. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 6 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 6 Hour after hour, page after page, the time passed unbearably slowly for the tired alicorn. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 7 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 7 She yawned and spent a moment looking down at her small, scaled assistant. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 8 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 8 He had been able to go to bed when she had wanted, only shortly after having received her book. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 9 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 9 Now she sat here, wanting to sleep but being unable. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 10 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 10 Thus she continued. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 11 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 11 On and on the book continued, reciting pointless fact after pointless fact. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 12 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 12 At least facts I have already read a hundred million times before. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 13 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 13 She sighed and turned the page. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 14 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 14 And the next page. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 15 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 15 And the next page. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 16 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 16 Suddenly, she turned the page. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 17 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 17 Twilight facebooked the book and pushed it to the side. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 18 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 18 She wanted to rest, and maybe she could afford just a moment or two. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 19 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 19 A simple few moments… //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 20 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 20 Grumble. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 21 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 21 “Damnit!” //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 22 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 22 Twilight immediately moved off of her bed and swiftly trotted down the stairs, each hoof resounding within the dark treehouse. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 23 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 23 Her horn glowed bright to illuminate the nice wooden furniture. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 24 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 24 She went into her kitchen and licked her lips when her eyes happened upon some cake from a party with Pinkie earlier that night. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 25 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 25 Now if only it hadn’t left me so drained. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 26 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 26 She picked it up and bit into her lip. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 27 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 27 Twilight had had so much to eat earlier that day, and this could upset the peculiar balance of her normal dietary system. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 28 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 28 She shrugged and slammed a hoof into the counter to flip the cake into the air. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 29 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 29 She opened her mouth wide, her jaw stretching to its absolute maximum and chomping down on the moist chocolate cake. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 30 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 30 Twilight shuddered in almost ecstasy as she savored the flavor. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 31 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 31 Her saliva mixed with the glorious pastry and melted it in almost a minute. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 32 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 32 More like 54 seconds, but I suppose close enough. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 34 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 34 With her snack devoured, Twilight slowly trotted up the stairs. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 35 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 35 She had given herself enough of a break and now had to get back to her book. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 36 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 36 Her extremely boring, annoying, aggravating, book. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 37 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 37 She opened the book and a small pain in her head told her that her superior intellect to most was already to the point of rejecting such dreck. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 38 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 38 She shook her head furiously and continued to read, against her minds warnings. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 39 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 39 On and on she read, never ending the sheer torture she had been assigned. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 40 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 40 The horror of the book knew no rest. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 41 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 41 Well it did know rest, or perhaps not. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 42 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 42 I mean the horrors never began in the first place. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 43 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 43 It would have been so much better if it had horror. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 44 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 44 Or plot. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 45 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 45 Or anything of interest, especially seeing as I am being forced to read this! //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 46 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 46 “Argh!” //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 47 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 47 Spike jumped as Twilight let out her raucous and rough scream into the heavens. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 49 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 49 Spike curled back up, his short tail wrapping around the small body. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 50 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 50 Unfortunately, because of his annoyance, the shovel shaped end slapped into his eye. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 51 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 51 “Ow.” //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 52 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 52 “Don’t hurt yourself Spike. Only one of us should be in agony tonight.” //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 53 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 53 Twilight curled herself back up tighter. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 54 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 54 She was cold at this point and the cacophony outside was driving her insane. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 55 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 55 She glared at the world outside, cursing the fact that she could not control and force the elements under her control. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 56 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 56 Yet at least. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 57 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 57 Yet. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 58 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 58 So onwards she read. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 59 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 59 Page by page by page by page. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 60 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 60 Wait. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 61 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 61 Sorry, Twilight was swatting at a lady bug that had landed on her bed. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 62 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 62 Now she continues to read page by page by page by page. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 64 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 64 “Someone just end this already. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 65 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 65 Please?” //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 66 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 66 Twilight moved to push the book away. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 67 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 67 It had no use to her and Celestia must have known that. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 68 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 68 However, this page was titled "Necromancy and all of its wondrous uses!”. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 69 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 69 Twilight’s eyes lit up at the mention of new magic and leaned in close. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 70 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 70 The veins in her eyes could be seen as she almost pressed her face back into it. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 71 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 71 The page read, Necromancy is merely a filly’s tale meant to scare little ponies. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 72 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 72 All unicorns who study it are stupid, and therefore, seeing as you are probably begging this to be of even the slightest interest, you are stupid. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 73 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 73 Continue reading please for our four thousand word description of paint drying for five minutes. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 74 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 74 We will continue to explain this process as it dries for nine hours. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 75 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 75 Twilight’s eyes twitched. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 76 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 76 Twitched again. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 77 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 77 Rage burrowed deep within the mare now grew, growing more powerful by the moment. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 78 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 78 She had had enough. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 79 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 79 This book now mocked her and would pay for the transgression. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 80 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 80 Her mind flashed a thousand different ideas from banishment to being forced to be put into the Apple family toilet. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 81 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 81 Which was an outhouse. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 82 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 82 However, she decided that the classic approach to book destruction would be best. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 83 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 83 She threw the book into the air, her eyes glowing bright white. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 84 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 84 Magic filled the room and Spike was rudely awaken as Twilight hovered in the air. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 85 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 85 More and more power grew in the tree. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 86 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 86 It threatened to break the house, wrend it from its roots and destroy the poor house. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 87 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 87 Finally, the spell was cast. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 88 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 88 The book lit on fire, burned up in five seconds, and then the ashes quickly disappeared. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 89 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 89 She had done it. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 90 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 90 She had destroyed the book. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 91 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 91 The book was the bane of her existence, and she had destroyed it. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 92 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 92 Burned it to ashes. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 93 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 93 Murdered literature. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 94 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 94 She smiled at having murdered the terrible book. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 95 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 95 It was horrible. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 96 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 96 No good. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 97 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 97 Very bad, even. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 99 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 99 But no, the book had to be murdered so that nopony would have to suffer what she went through. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 100 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 100 Twilight let out a content sigh, and curled up in her bed. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 101 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 101 She was asleep very quickly, a content smile on her face. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 102 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 102 Her dreams were filled by the only dreams that a mare in her predicament could have. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 103 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 103 The only type of dream that anyone in this predicament could have. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 104 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 104 She dreamed a dream, of that there was no doubt. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 105 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 105 However, the dream of millions of facts and books, being punched, doused, and then burned as high as the sky (or her when she has the extra bits) was beautiful. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 106 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 106 However, then the problem came. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 107 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 107 Facts pushed the glory out. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 108 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 108 Boring mundane facts. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 109 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 109 About what? //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 110 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 110 Only the most horrible, frightening, boring thing ever. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 111 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 111 So there she sat in her dream, thinking only about how paint may have dried for nine hours. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 112 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 112 Twilight woke up screaming. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 113 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 113 She couldn’t take it, she had to know. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 114 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 114 It would haunt her until she died. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 115 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 115 The bookstore manager was glad to see her, but not so glad as every book was ripped from its shelving. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 116 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 116 Finally, she had it back in her possession, and she was going to READ IT! //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 117 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 117 And there she sat, for hours, reading about how paint dried. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 1 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 1 It was a dark stormy night with winds as powerful as tanks knocking against the treehouse of the ever infamous and highly regarded Princess Alicorn Twilight Sparkle. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 2 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 2 She was just laying down on her wondrous sheets and wearing her normal silk pajamas. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 3 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 3 She had reading to do, and though the book did not look interesting, Princess Celestia had assigned it so she had to read it. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 33 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 33 She thanked her messy style of eating as she licked her lavender muzzle, enjoying each sweet morsel of sweet frosting. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 48 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 48 “Jeez Twilight, with a scream like that, you might just pierce the heavens or something.” //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 63 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 63 She stopped as she got to the next chapter, needing to shake her head to try to clear the pain building behind her eyes. //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 98 //-------------------------------------------------------// Chapter 98 She almost wished she hadn’t burned the book so that she could repeatedly punch it over and over for being so miserable to her.