In a Pickle

by Final Draft

Rating: mature
Tags: Sex, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy
Length: 2469

Twilight gets into a pickle. Then a pickle gets into Twilight.

Twilight decides to take up gardening for a rather odd reason, and quickly gets discouraged when her plants fail to grow as fast as she wants. Rather than wait for nature, she uses a spell to speed up the growing process. This results in sentient vegetables. Sentient, phallic vegetables.

Published 2014-09-27 23:50:07 UTC
Last updated 2014-09-27 23:50:07 UTC

Cu-cum-bers

Applejack trotted up to the front of the Golden Oaks Library and anxiously knocked on the door. She'd spent all morning getting the seeds that Twilight had requested, and couldn't wait to find out why her friend needed them so urgently. When the unicorn opened the door, she greeted her friend warmly and invited her in.

"Did you get them all?" Twilight asked, pointing to Applejack's saddlebag.

"Sure did," the earth pony replied, reaching in and pulling out a small satchel. Twilight wasted no time in levitating the satchel over to her table and she emptied the contents. Seeds of varying shapes and sizes spilled out, and Twilight quickly organized them. Applejack stood over her, waiting for a thank you. "Does that all look to be in order?" she asked.

"Let's see," Twilight said, stroking her chin. "Cucumber, summer squash, winter squash, zucchini, carrot—yup, they're all here," Twilight said, sweeping them back into the satchel.

Applejack watched as Twilight opened the door to her laboratory and walked through it without another word. "Uh, Twi," Applejack called after her. When she didn't receive a response, she followed after her friend. Twilight was already at the bottom of the stairs, standing in front of a large indoor garden.

There were heat lamps and irrigation troughs lining the garden which took up the majority of the laboratory. As Applejack approached, she saw the garden already had little tags indicating what would be grown in each plot. Twilight used her magic to plant each of the seeds, not realizing she'd been followed.

"So, uh, Twi," Applejack said as she approached. "Mind tellin' me what you're up to?"

Twilight turned, surprised to see her friend was still there. "Oh, AJ, I, uh…thanks for the seeds!"

Applejack tilted her head, knowing something wasn't quite right. "Y'all right Twi?" she asked. "Yer actin' kinda…funny."

Twilight shifted her hooves and bit her lower lip. A slight hue of red lit up her cheeks as she tried to avoid eye contact with her friend. "I'm having a bit of a…problem," she said slowly. "You know…a mare problem."

"Oh," Applejack said as realization slowly came over her. "Oh, sorry, Ah didn't mean to pry. Uh, that doesn't have anythin' to do with needin' those seeds, does it?"

Twilight's blush intensified, confirming Applejack's assumption. "They're, um, they're for an experiment, let's say," Twilight laughed nervously.

Applejack chuckled uncomfortably and took a few steps back towards the stairs. "Well, Ah'll just leave you to that then," she said. She got halfway up the stairs and stopped, feeling the blood rushing to her cheeks before she whispered, "The cucumbers work best." The door closed, leaving Twilight with a slight feeling of relief. Even if she had wanted to keep her experiment secret, it was nice to know Applejack understood.

Twilight shifted her rear legs, trying to get her mind off of the uncomfortable heat emanating from her marehood. Oh, she was in heat all right, and this month she was going to do something about it. She focused on planting the rest of the seeds, and when she finished, she doused the crops with water.

"Okay," she said, turning on the heat lamps and stepping back. "And now we wait."

Waiting turned into a painful task. Twilight paced around the table, watching the soil absorb the water, all the while, the friction on her sensitive sex was causing her extreme discomfort. She could feel her fluids seeping out and trailing down her legs, matting her fur together.

A half hour went by like this, and still the seeds had failed to sprout. Twilight finally approached her agriculture books and began flipping through the pages. To her dismay, she saw that most of her crops would take about sixty-two days to mature. She'd been so focused on crop yield and size that she'd overlooked the growth cycle completely.

The need to be rutted was clouding her mind, and she threw the book in frustration. She plopped down on the hard floor and stared up at the ceiling. Her hoof subconsciously rubbed at her swollen clit as she tried to think.

I could just go buy some—but what if somepony figures out what I'm using them for? Buying just one cucumber would be just as suspicious as buying twenty. I'm not reusing them; that's unsanitary.

Her hoof was drenched in her juices and small moans escaped her mouth. She continued working small circles, giving her vagina only a small amount of what it craved. Such stimulation only proved to make Twilight more frustrated, and she finally had to force herself to stop.

When she stood up, she looked at her little garden with agitation. Within two months, it would provide all the vegetables she'd need to stay satisfied. That was far too long a wait for Twilight. She knew there were risks to casting spells on organic materials, but there were other forces driving her thought process. The thought of a twenty inch cucumber penetrating her more deeply than any stallion ever could was the primary one.

Her horn began to glow as she focused her magic on the rows of seeds. Slowly, the soil parted as little stalks rose up towards the heat lamp's warmth. Despite the quivering in her loins, Twilight managed to keep the spell under complete control. Over the course of a few minutes, the sprouts flowered and vines coiled across the soil.

As the first of the fruits began to grow, Twilight licked her lips hungrily. She watched as one cucumber in particular reached maturity, growing like the member of a horny stallion. Only this was green and didn't have attachment issues. Plus, it would last until she was done.

The other crops came in nicely as well; several different gourds pushed through the soil as they expanded in size, taking up a vast majority of the table. Twilight looked at the winter squash in contemplation, debating if she could handle them. The length was shorter than a cucumber's, but the girth was where the problem lay.

While she was thinking about mounting one of the squash and riding it reverse cow-pony, she briefly lost control of her spell. The vines and leaves of the plants shivered angrily before she regained her focus. No damage had been done, so she continued on. She did find it odd, however, that as the vegetables grew, they started gravitating toward her.

It only makes sense; they grow towards the biggest source of nutrients. My magic is now the biggest source of their nutrients, Twilight rationalized. And how nutritious it was! The vegetables continued to grow well after the point of normal maturity, reaching sizes that would stretch even the loosest of mares.

The magic from Twilight's horn ceased, and the stalks and vines stopped expanding. Twilight was absolutely seeping in anticipation as she walked circles around the table. It was like she was at market, picking out which one she wanted to purchase; exactly the scenario she had wanted to avoid in public.

She decided to take Applejack's advice and began sizing up the cucumbers. I need one with length as well as girth, she thought to herself. The perfect cucumber for her needs dangled at the front of the patch, practically begging to be inserted into her. Twilight smacked her lips and reached out to hold the behemoth, just to feel its weight.

"Oh, this will work nicely," she said, bobbing the cucumber up and down on its vine. She gave it a small tug at the stem, trying to remove it from the vine, but it held on. The vegetable seemed reluctant to go anywhere, so Twilight used her magic. The cucumber rose up like the member of a stallion, suspended in Twilight's magic. Still, the vine would not release the vegetable.

"Come on," Twilight said with frustration. She accidentally pulled too hard, causing the entire plant, roots and all, to fly out of the garden. If nothing else, she had the cucumber ever closer to where it needed to go.

Wanting to waste no more time with the stubborn vegetable, Twilight brought the vine of swollen produce over to a padded mat she'd prepared for the occasion. She lay down on her back and spread her rear legs in anticipation. Her vaginal secretions would provide supple lubricant, but just to be sure, she brought the cucumber up to her mouth.

She ran her tongue up and down the waxy skin of the vegetable, coating it with her saliva. Her hips gyrated as she took the cucumber into her mouth, thoroughly enjoying the experience. If the cucumber had been a stallion, it likely would have felt the same way.

After a few moments of oral enjoyment, Twilight slid the cucumber out of her mouth. Saliva trailed from it to her tongue as she brought the cucumber down to its final destination. She arched her back as the tip of the vegetable pressed against her marehood, and she prepared to take it.

Her lips spread, wrapping tightly around the foreign object. The first couple inches caused Twilight a little discomfort, but after that, it was smooth sailing. She let out a sigh of pleasure as more and more of the cucumber entered her. She closed her eyes, just visualizing the massive vegetable as it traveled toward her uterus.

Something suddenly pressed against her anus, causing her eyes to fly open. She looked down to see a second, slightly smaller cucumber pressing against her back door without the use of her magic. The vines moved on their own accord, bringing the vegetable to her.

It wasn't the only one either. Several of the other cucumbers on the plant were also making their way to her. The cucumber already inside of her vagina began thrusting even though Twilight had released it from her magic. The sensation it was causing hindered her ability to react to the situation.

The roots and vines of the plant managed to wrap around her rear hooves, giving it leverage over her. She tried to scream, but a cucumber was thrust into her mouth the second it opened. As much as she wanted to break from the vegetables, her much needed orgasm was on its way.

Just enjoy it, a small voice inside Twilight's head whispered. The plant was doing her a favor, after all. So she began servicing the cucumber in her mouth as if it was a stallion. While she went to work on that, she relaxed enough to allow the persistent cucumber to enter her anus. Enough of her juices had leaked down to provide an adequate amount of lubrication, and it slid in painlessly.

With all of her holes filled, Twilight embraced the fruits of her labor. They are fruits if they have seeds, right? No, these are still vegetables: cucumbers. But on a PH scale, mares are acidic. Does that mean the ones inside me are now pickles?

Twilight's thoughts were scattered and incoherent as the building pressure inside her mounted to explode any moment. Her body rocked as the plant rutted her senseless. Each of the cucumbers (pickles) penetrating her pushed harder and harder as they tried to get their entirety into the unicorn.

A sick, slopping noise came from between Twilight's legs as she finally came. Her eyes rolled back in her head, and shivers of euphoria racked her body. It was the relief she'd been craving, and she just wanted to enjoy her after glow. The pickles, however, were still continuing their rhythmic thrusting.

Twilight let out stifled moans as a second, more powerful orgasm began to build. With the extra lubrication from her previous orgasm, and thanks to the vigorous rutting she'd received, her vagina was loose enough to allow a second cucumber to enter. A third cucumber tried to follow, but instead took to pushing against her swollen clitoris.

The sensation was almost too much to handle, and Twilight braced for the dam to break. She thrust her hips in time with the pickles, ensuring they were deep as they could possibly be.

Almost! Almost! ALMOOOOST!

The force of Twilight's second orgasm was immeasurable in any form of mathematic or scientific calculation. All of her muscles went into spasms and even the vines had a hard time containing her. The muscles in her jaw even spasmed, causing her to bite down on the pickle in her mouth. Her teeth went clean through it, and she nearly choked as the severed half went down her throat.

Every last pickle inside of her pulled out and the plant began writhing in pain. Twilight lay in a puddle of her own juices as the vines unraveled from around her and the plant flailed about. With what little clarity of mind Twilight had, she used her magic to subdue the injured plant.

"I'm sorry!" she tried apologizing, but the plant didn't understand; it was just a plant, after all. Carefully, Twilight brought the cucumber vines back to the garden and plopped it into the soil. The roots dug in and slowly it stopped convulsing. Twilight watched and waited to see if it would once again reach out for her.

All was quiet in the lab, and Twilight drew a deep sigh of relief. She stumbled back to her mat, exhausted from the ordeal, and with a plop she lay down to rest. Her experiment, while it had a few hitches, had been a success, and the horrible horniness she'd been experiencing was finally eased. The plants would continue growing, and she could use them whenever she needed.

Or they would use her whenever they felt like it…

As Twilight lay facedown on the mat, she felt something hard press against her beaten pussy. It was much larger than a cucumber, and she turned to see a winter squash forcing its way into her. Nearly the entire garden had uprooted itself and was crawling toward its biggest source of nutrients. Twilight was going to have her salad tossed by a tossed salad.

Author's Note

Rarity levitated a forkful of steamed vegetables to her mouth and hesitated. "Twilight, we do appreciate you having us over for dinner—for the fifth time this week—but would it be too much to request more variety from your meals?"

Rainbow Dash looked at her bowl with disinterest. "Yeah, no offense, but your cooking isn't the best. Everything tastes like pickles!"

Tried to find a place for the above somewhere, but couldn't manage to have AJ there and not freaking out about the whole "Twilight feeding her friends her organic sex toys" thing. Anyway, you just got to read a story about Twilight being gangbanged by a garden. I hope you enjoyed it to some degree. I don't plan on writing any (much) more clop after this.