Equestrian Navy Chronicles

It was a beautiful sunny morning on the deck of the RES Polaris. Lightning Dust finished her scouting runs, Derpy had baked fresh raspberry muffins for breakfast, even Captain Blueblood was in good spirits sporting his new ruby broche. All seemed well on the Equestrian Seas.

“BARK!” Loose Screw the ship medic yelped after checking Lieutenant Encore Bravo’s temperature.

“*cough! *cough!* What? The feather-flu?!” Bravo said through coughs and wheezes.

“BARK! prrrrrr.” Loose Screw continued.

“Gotchyu, plenty of bed rest, and fluids.” Bravo mumbled drawing the covers back over him.

“Ribbit! WOOF!” Screw said, then packed her things and made for the door.

Alone, Lt. Bravo laid back in his bed for a few minutes until Derpy entered the room with a plate of muffins and a glass of  juice. “I heard you weren’t feeling good Lieutenant Sir, but I brought you your breakfast, I hope you feel better.” Derpy said setting the tray next to Bravo.

“Thank you Miss Hooves, if you wouldn’t mind *cough*, could you bring this list of daily officer duties to Captain Blueblood, *COUGH* COUGH!* COUGH!*.....uhh.. since I’m not feeling good today, he’s gonna have to take care of my daily responsibilities.” Bravo moaned handing Derpy a sheet of paper with a list of duties that he normally performs on a daily basis.

“Yes sir, Mr. Lieutenant Encore Bravo Sir!” Derpy saluted, then left the room and headed for Captain Blueblood’s quarters.

Captain Blueblood was in his quarters, standing in front of a large elegantly crafted mirror in front of him admiring his shiny new uniform and the fine ruby broche he purchased before leaving Canterlot. “A fine accessory for a royal officer, hehehe.” Blueblood giggled to himself until he was interrupted by  a knock at his door, “come in” he groaned.

Derpy entered the room and saluted, “Sir Captain Prince Blueblood sir, Lieutenant Bravo sir  is  sick sir, so he wanted me to give you this list sir.” Derpy said holding up the piece of paper.

Blueblood picked it up with his magic and read the note to himself. The list read as followed:

Number one: Assign the scouts to a specific  direction and set distance.

Number two: instruct the cook on meal arrangements, and what to cook.

Number three: make sure the oars are polished and maintained

Number four: check current location on map

Number five: double check current location on the map

Number six: triple check current location  on the map in case you missed anything when you double checked your position on the map

Number seven: DID YOU CHECK YOUR POSITION ON THE MAP YET!?!?!?

Number eight: poker game with Comet and Lucky after dinner.

Blueblood was puzzled by some of the tasks on the list, “poker? that’s absurd” he thought. But then he simply brushed it off as quickly as it came. “Well, easy enough to remember, Miss Hooves, send Miss Dust out on her usual scouting run, have the yeoponies check their oars and bring me my breakfast, I’m famished!” Blueblood said crumbling up the list.

“Yes sir, but um sir don’t you think sir that you should check the maps sir?” Derpy said in a timid and confused tone.

“That can be dealt with later, I can’t do this on an empty stomach. And as for meal arrangements for the rest of the day, make due with what you have, surprise me!”

Blueblood continued.

“Yes sir, right away sir.” Derpy said then left.

“This is too easy, if Bravo can do this everyday, I can do it in less than an hour.” Blueblood said confidently.

--three hours later--

Blueblood was in the center of his quarters doing yoga when suddenly First Mare Trixie Lulamoon stormed in with a look of terror and fear.

“Captain sir! We have a prob........uh...may Trixie ask what are you doing?”

“OH! Uhm, nothing, what’s the problem that caused you to intrude on my personal time?” Blueblood said, blushing in embarrassment as he quickly snapped to his normal posture.

“Sir, we have a problem, Lightning Dust has been gone for 3 hours, there’s some strange rattling noises coming from the kitchen, and......”

“And what?” Blueblood asserted.

“And we’re lost.” Trixie said shyly.

“Nonsense, with my guidance I’m sure we can........” Blueblood stepped out of his office seeing an incredibly thick fog over the ships deck.

“Ugh! This is dreadful I can hardly see my own hoof in front of my face! How can this get any worse?”

Suddenly Lightning Dust came hurdling onto the ships’s deck and crashed in front of Blueblood and Trixie. Moments later Comet Tail and Lucky Clover came to her aid and picked her up. Still somewhat dazed, Lightning looked to Blueblood and said, “there’s something out there! IT’S AFTER ME!! AHHHH!!” Lighting began to contort and flail around, knocking both Comet and Lucky unconscious and then flying around in crazy zig-zags around the ship.

“She’s gone mad” Trixie said in a sheepish tone.

“How can this get any worse?” Blueblood said.

Moments later Derpy bolted out of the kitchen door screaming “EVERYONE RUN FOR LIVES IT’S THE APPETIZER!! AHHH!!”

All of a sudden a large red and yellow scaled dragon named Garble smashed down the front portion of the kitchen cabin roaring and then flying around breathing fire.

“How can thi....”

“Sir, Trixie advises you to please shut up.” Trixie said plugging Captain Blueblood’s mouth with her hoof.

Pulling her hoof off his face, Blueblood was now in a state of panic seeing the chaos around him, “WHAT DO WE DO!?!? I’M A FAILURE WITHOUT THAT BLUE FEATHERHEAD HERE!! I need him, I NEED BRAVO.”

--half a minute later--

“Buck off! I’m tryin’ to sleep flank-hole!” Lieutenant Encore Bravo said as he  heard knocking on his cabin door.

“PLEASE BRAVO! I’M A MESS WITHOUT YOU!” Blueblood said in a pathetic pleading tone from the other side of the door.

“errrrgghhhh. fine...*sniff* *cough*..uuuggghhhh. I’ll come.” Bravo said opening the door, but obviously still looking very weak from the feather-flu

“THANK YOU, I LOVE YOU!” Blueblood said embracing Lt. Bravo. After a few moments,  he released Bravo, who then was on the ground barely responsive. “uh-oh, do not fear my blue-friend, I shall carry you!” Blueblood stated with pride.

With his magic Captain Blueblood  dragged Bravo onto the deck by his tail, to see all the crew running around and screaming from the chaos.

-meanwhile somewhere outside of this fanfiction--

Discord is sitting back in a  floating rainbow beach chair eating milk-duds, and watching the chaos from a TV screen in a cloud. He then turned to us and said, “this is better than cable.” xD

--meanwhile back in the actual story--

“What do we do lieutenant? This is anarchy!” Blueblood said in desperation.

Bravo cracked open his eyes and surveyed the chaos. Suddenly Garble swooped down and tried to grab him, but Blueblood somehow worked up the courage to get in the way and stop him.

“NNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!” Blueblood yelled as he followed his step by striking at Garble with all his might.

*SMACK*................ Blueblood lightly smacked at the dragon’s face. The two adversaries then stopped. Garble held his face while wearing an awkward expression, all the while Blueblood stood there frozen, wearing a look of pure fear.

“Uh, dude, did you just slap me?” Garble said rubbing his cheek.

“um, n-n-ye-ni-yes.” Blueblood stuttered.

“Lame dude, now it’s my turn” Garble said about to roast the poor unicorn alive.

“Hey Captain.” Bravo said inching towards Blueblood.

“what is it Bravo? Don’t you see I’m cowering in fear!?” Blueblood responded.

“Can I see that broache?”

“Nu-HEY!” Blueblood said as Bravo quickly snatched Blueblood’s new ruby broache and waved it in front of Garble knowing that gems were like candy to dragons.

“Look at the pretty ruby Ga-ga-bull!” Bravo said hypnotizing Garble with the dragon’s mindless hunger for gems. “See the pretty ruby?!”

Garble nodded with drool dripping from his teeth. “FETCH!” Bravo shouted as he threw the ruby as far as he could, prompting Garble to fly off into the fog to find it barking all the way. xP

“Easy, as hay-fries...urrgghhh” Bravo said as he passed out.

--three more hours later--

Lieutenant Encore Bravo awoke back in his cabin surrounded Captain Blueblood, First Mare Trixie, Doctor Screw Loose, and Chef Derpy Hooves.

“What’s going on?” Bravo said seeing his audience around him.

“Well the ship was roasted by a dragon” Trixie said

“You owe me a new broache” Blueblood huffed.

“RUFF! ARROOO!” Screw Loose added.

“OH! And Comet and Lucky are in a coma, Lighting Dust is flying around screaming in fear, and we’re still lost in the fog.” Derpy stated and concluded with a wacky smile.

Meanwhile outside, the ship was still buzzing with mayhem, until suddenly the ship crashed onto an island. Back inside Bravo’s cabin, the group inside looked out the window, “Well at least we’re not lost at sea anymore.” Bravo said casually, prompting Blueblood and Trixie to groan in frustration.

THE END.