I suppose this is where I'm supposed to persuade you to read on; so here goes nothing...
I am Doctor Cipher. Some regard me as a villain - and they're right.
My...'assistant'... Inkis Pie and I are here to rid the world of those who are deserving of it; which is most ponies who I have ever had the misfortune to encounter.
I have developed a drug. A very powerful one. It causes severe nightmarish hallucinations, so much so that people can even go as far as murdering they're own child, thinking that it was a giant spider.
But now Inkis is turning against me. I have nowhere to run. This may be the last thing I will ever write, or do. The royal guard is after me. Celestia's forces are cruel and unforgiving. Send help.