Villainy - A Profession

by Link02

Rating: everyone
Tags: Princess Cadance, Comedy, Queen Chrysalis, Shining Armor, Discord, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 2474

With wedding plans going askew, a seal made not long ago begins to crack.

With Queen Chrysalis still disguised as the bride, Cadance, and Twilight sealed in Crystal Mines below, things begin to go askew as the chaos she's causing has an unintended side-effect.

'Surely you could have done better than that, Chrysie.'

[Chapter Two is now up! However, being fresh, expect there to be a refined version sometime later.]

(Things will become clear soon enough.)

Looking for editors and pre-readers. http://www.fimfiction.net/blog/23471 Apply if interested.
Cover image (temporarily) by glancojusticar

Published 2012-04-23 00:24:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-04-23 14:36:10 UTC

An Unwelcome Guest of Honor

"Mares and Gentlecolts."

crack

"We are gathered here today to witness-"

crackle-crumble

"-the union of Princess Mi Amore Cadenza-"

A yawn and an early morning stretch.

"-and Shining Armour."

"Oh. Took them long enough."
A long serpent-like tail drags its way across the royal gardens, following a goat and lizard pair of legs.

Meanwhile, down in the Diamond Mines, where Canterlot rests itself upon, Twilight Sparkle and the true Cadance had traveled a long way through its winding maze of crystalline walls.

"Oh... we're never going to save him..." spoke the tearful Cadance.
'We will! We just have to find-' Twilight replied, spotting an open way through the ceiling of the cave.
'There!', she used her magic to then teleport both herself and Cadance up above the opening, only to come face-to-face with the missing bridesmaids who were placed under a hypnotic spell.

"You're not going anywhere...!" called out the bridesmaids all with a ghoulish tone to their voices as they made their slow approach towards the two. Backing away slowly, both Cadance and Twilight needed to come up with a plan to get passed the bridesmaids if they were to make it to stop the wedding in time.

With a brief moment of good thinking, Cadance produced a bouquet of lavenders to use as a distraction, throwing it off in to the distance with a levitation spell, watching as the bridesmaids movements shifted towards catching the bouquet. With that out of the way, they could safely make their way towards the wedding ceremony.

"If there's anything I've learned about handling a group of 'friends', it is probably best to keep them apart from each-other at all times... bah, but where's the fun in that?! Watching their antics was great fun!"

The creature made its approach towards the doors of the castle, easily disposing of what he saw as the 'red-shirt guards' at the click of its claws.

"...and if there's anything some ponies should know about me - it is that I sure do know how to make an entrance!"

The creature finished, closing the doors behind it as two dazed guards lie at the front doors as a few others showed up to check on their health.

As the guards began carrying the two away, Twilight and Cadance made their way inside without being noticed. Twilight had taken note of the slithering tail that was seen going inside and wanted to pursue further in the case that things could get worse.

"Laaaa daa-di-daaaa~ Laaaa doopty-daaaa~" sang the rather joyous creature as he slinked his way across the grand hall towards the Wedding Ceremony, only to glance outside the glass windows to the reception area to see the local DJ setting her equipment up. With a smile, he continued on towards his destination, humming the rest of the way. Just behind some of the pillars in the hall, Twilight and Cadance stood separate from one another, watching as the strange creature was heading in the direction they were going. With a confused look from behind the pillars, they glanced to one another.

"Discord!? H-Ho-How did he-" struggled the mouthful words of which Twilight needed need to say after their moment of silence.

"...The Wedding!", Cadance reminded Twilight through the brief confusion.

Having reached the back of the castle to where the the ceremony was taking place, the creature known as Discord stood tall as a hat and a tie were magically fixated to his body, the hat; broken and crooked, hanging pierced by one of his horns and the tie flailing around attached to the end of his tail.

"Princess Cadance and Shining Armour," spoke Celestia from beyond the doors

Well, here we go!

A big, cheesy grin glowing on his face as he tilted his hat slightly with his tiger paw, he made a coughing gesture before slamming the doors open with a kick of his goat hoof and a flick of his claw. Only moments later, Twilight and the real Cadance approached him from behind, looking passed him and in to the wedding hall, determined to put a stop to the fake Cadance's plans.

"Surprise~!" called Discord as he made his way along the walkway, seeing ponies left and right watching him in awe of his approach, only to have them soon realize that it was in fact the "Discord", as he summoned a milkshake and straw in to the grip of his claw.

Somewhere else in Canterlot was a shocked Pony Joe after checking underneath the bar only to come up and see one less Milkshake to be served on the tray.

"Hey! Who took one of my orders?!", he asked to no one in particular.

Discord, sipping from the straw loudly, watched as the strawberry milkshake emptied halfway to his stomach, only to look back up towards the supposed bride and her groom.

"You know... you haven't really done much of a good job so far... It's been rather boring to watch. But I must say that one musical number you did was quite splendid!"

The shocked impostor was at a loss for words and Celestia could only barely keep her mouth from hanging. Shining Armour on the other hand wasn't really holding much for reaction, which Discord didn't really enjoy seeing, so he decided to cut off the feeding line of magic that the impostor Cadance had set up before the wedding.

A slightly dazed Shining Armour shook his head, blinking a few times before questioning what was going on.
The impostor could only hiss in response to her magic feeding supply being cut off.

"Well, you had your chance but I decided to cut you short a bit."

A brief moment of silence washed over the hall as Twilight and Cadance shook off their daze and made their way passed Discord's towering form.

"Discord?!", called out the rest of Twilight's friends, who were currently working as bridesmaids.

"Cadance? What? There's two?", questioned a confused Shining Armour, only then just taking notice of the large Draconequus in the middle of the room, as though he was attending a tea party and he hadn't noticed the giant, pink elephant sitting at the table, having a cup of tea. "Discord?! Twilight, what's going on?!"

Applejack decided to speak up amongst her friends, "Ah don't understand! How come Discord's here? ...and why are there two of Cadance?"

"She's a... a changeling!" Cadance began to explain, slightly unnerved by the presence of the large figure that loomed a few hooves behind her wearing a smirk on his face as his gaze drew back to the impostor.

Continuing, "She... she takes the form of somepony you love... and gains power from feeding off your love for them!", trying to put passion back in to her voice and shaking herself free of the nerves she was getting.

Had things gone smoothly all along and this had been her wedding... she held a slight fear in having her nerves playing up had that actually happened, but wanted to get through this and to be with her love at home... or at least someplace better than here at that very moment.

Perhaps with Twilight... and perhaps her friends too. Lots and lots of cake after getting through all of this. Yes. Most definitely.

A Reunion of Tremors

The impostor having been caught was beginning to feel more tense than she first realized.

As confident as her mindset may have once been, she began to start feeling what could be compared to cold feet, having to face the appearance of a new and unexpected development take her by surprise. This could be a turn for the worse for her.

Had it been just Twilight, things would have gone much better than she had planned, the joy in picturing the foal as she would get dragged away; her magic restricted.

With the addition of Cadance, things would be getting a little hairy, but she would have no fear of facing such an easy target were she to reveal her true form and begin her plans with her army outside, waiting in the distance, ready to strike on her command.

Now with this... this was getting to her nerves. She felt both anger and fear in what was to come, but steeled herself ready, regardless of what events might follow. Her plan was yet to be foiled completely, but she needed to find an ace to hide up her sleeve before anyone could realize what she could have in mind.

The power she had gained from feeding off of Shining Armour was strong. Very strong. However, it had been cut a little early and she did not feel... complete. Whole. She needed additional power and she needed it more than she had ever desired before.

She decided to wing it.

"Ah, ah, ahh" tutted Discord in regard to the impostor's angered expression.

He leaned down towards the true Cadance and whispered, "Would you mind throwing this at her for me?", holding out to Cadance the Milkshake glass he held in his claw.

Cadance took the glass from him using her levitation magic, returning a brief smile.

"With pleasure."

She launched the glass at the impostor, full speed, only to see the sudden reflex of the impostor's magic that caught the projectile and its contents mid-throw.

"First flaw; the impostor forgets one highly important detail" remarked Discord, dryly.

With a click of his claw, his form had magically appeared out of nowhere behind the impostor and Shining Armour, stretching his arms across both of their shoulders and looking to the guilty of the two.

"You, my dear, need to learn how to conceal things more easily. I am amazed however as to how long the sickly green glow of your horn has been left unnoticed. Sure, I could have left that flaw be, but where's the fun in that? Which reminds me; I should probably write a gossip column of my own some time!"

Discord's focus shifted with a grin towards the three bridesmaid 'Cutie Mark Crusaders' who had been hiding themselves behind Rainbow Dash, Applejack and Rarity, only to peek out in response to the mentioning of a 'gossip column'. They quickly hid themselves again as the three ponies they were hiding behind responded with little more than angry glares, seeing as to how little they could do in this current situation, having not formulated a plan themselves for such a scenario without the aid of Twilight, whom they had shunned up to this point since the events that had transpired earlier that day.

"Of course, I'd need my own newspaper! But whatever should I call it?" questioned the honestly curious Discord.

He disregarded the presence of Celestia standing just behind him and waved his tail around, back and forth in front of her face as the tie flopped over one of her ears. She knew most of Discord's tiresome antics and this tail-tie wasn't the first she'd seen from him. She was still surprised at how short the seal had lasted and needed to quickly come up with a way to send him packing, keeping the tie lopped on her head. This peculiar antic of Discord's had the awkward tendency to actually help her think calmly. She shook her head lightly, throwing the tie off of her, trying to remove the thoughts she was having that looked back to earlier times.

Her composure had mostly managed to return, yet she allowed for the events to go on a little longer to see where Discord was going with this and to see what this impostor really was. She felt a pang of guilt having not realized the difference in magic that the impostor had been using.

She had kept watch on Canterlot throughout most of the day prior through her telescope and had seen glimpses of whom she had then thought was Cadance acting rather strangely, even with the way she was using her magic.
She had brushed it off as pre-wedding stress and yet it had been bugging her as the differences in magical auras were too great apart to that of the Cadance she'd known.

The last time that Celestia and Cadance had spoken was little over a fortnight ago and seeing as to how little contact between the two was made since then had left her feeling a little unsettled... but the wedding had to go on.

For both Cadance and Shining Armour... and her prized student; Twilight Sparkle, whom she had shunned during the practice ceremony only a short while ago.

She had never felt so low in a thousand years. Her negligence had cost her the feelings she felt she had torn from Twilight's heart and shattered... yet she had to hold her firm composure.

Much silence had undergone the past few minutes with a tensity that Discord was only now beginning to realize as he had been pondering the answer to his own question, having taken the glass of milkshake back from the still, magical hold that it was under with his paw.

Discord took yet another small sip from the straw.

"Hmm... how about... Emerald Times?"

A few disagreeing voices sounded from the crowd. Twilight had been glaring at Discord throughout most of this silence, giving a few glances towards the impostor who's identity was still yet to be revealed. Discord was really trying her patience.

A random colt from amongst the crowd pushed forward to the front and sounded his opinion.

"What about... Equestria Da-"

"NO!" replied most of the crowd in a hurried manner.

"Aww..." sadly spoke the colt who returned to his place in the crowd, watching as a few ponies around him gave him an irritated glare.

Suddenly, the doors to the ceremony hall burst open as guards took formation at the door as the princess of the night made her way in with her composure held mostly firm, with a hint of tiredness, having been awoken to the urgency of the matter at hand.

"Why, it's so nice to see you again, Luna!" called out a beaming Discord as he waved her over, "Come on! Join in with the reunion! We're all here now!"

Luna could only sigh as she made her approach.

"Do you know what time it is? We are unsure of whether this may all be a bad dream or not" Luna called out to her sister. She didn't really like it when her sister pulled this prank on her, but this time things were a bit too odd to be considered a trick from Celestia.

Discord responded to this with a click of his claws, as the milkshake he was holding had suddenly appeared floating over Luna's head, pouring its contents down on to her.

"Ha. Ha. Very funny" Luna flatly replied.