No, correction. If I were drugged, I’d likely be happy right now. Instead, I am feeling like absolute shit. Like there’s fucking ice water running through my veins.

Struggling, I managed to bring the world back into focus, and gave the white horse thing my most stern of all glares. The very same glare I’d give to a misbehaving student who was trying to discretely masterbate under his desk, while paying no heed to the actual lessons that I was attempting to teach to the ungrateful youth. It’s the same glare I gave to my lovely ex girlfriend, before I married the love of my life, when I caught her stealing what little I had, and pawning them off so she could pay back a loan from her second husband.

And just like with all those other times I gave my teacherly glare, this time too, it was entirely ineffective.

“Mr. Finn, please. This is all for your own good.” Spoke the white horse, unaffected by my deathly glare.

“What the hell are you doing to me?! Stop it, now.”

“I’m sorry, but this must be done. As you’ve no doubt realized, I am indeed casting a spell on you. This spell is to ensure that you remain sane and coherent, which under the current circumstances, is no easy feat. I transported you to a different land, and this was against your will. Interdimensional teleportation can unfortunately take a toll on one's subconscious, which is why I have been casting relaxation spells on you, to cloud your mind, and ease your transition. It also helps surprisingly well as a conversation starter, as it gives a sense of inner warmth and acceptance to whomever it’s cast upon.” Said the white horse with the billowing mane. I was silent throughout her entire explanation, and listened carefully to each and every word. Logically, everything that she said had made total and complete sense, at least in regards to my mental state. I’m sure being thrown from one dimension to the next could cause quite a few mental breakdowns, and Celestia was simply trying to avoid that, for my own sake. But still, this entire situation was just beyond crazy, and if she hadn’t of stolen me from my own dimension, or wherever the fuck it is I came from, none of this would be needed. I’d likely still be teaching a bunch of ungrateful little fucks, and living my life as a normal and relatively sane teacher, if such a thing can truly exist.

And yet, here I am. A land of magic. A land of ponies. The fact that I am now in an entirely different dimension, brings up a rather important question, doesn’t it?

“Why am I here?”

I honestly wasn’t entirely certain if I had asked that question before, or whether or not I had received some form of answer. The question carried with it a weight, like the simple act of asking lifted some kind of previously unnoticed burden. But this question wasn’t of a philosophical nature, no. It was a literal question of why and where I am in space and time.

Okay, so perhaps it was somewhat philosophical as well, though that was definitely not my intent.

Celestia looked at me with a soft smile, and when our eyes met, I could see a wealth of deep knowledge and understanding hidden within them. “Mr. Finn,” she spoke, “to be entirely honest with you, I don’t really know why I brought you here, simply that you are an important part to Equestria’s future. So in short, what you do here is why you’re here.”

Wait, what? Did she seriously just answer my question, while also not quite answering my question? That’s a rare talent, and one that I both respect, and despise. At the same time, no less. It definitely warrants a glare.

And unsurprisingly, she’s once again totally immune to my teacherly glare, which I’d be mostly fine with, if it hadn’t caused her to giggle at my expense. I swear, I even felt myself physically deflate, and could hear an unusual whooshing of air as my mood turned its tail towards depression.

No, hang on a moment. That wasn’t in my head. I literally heard myself deflate. I even felt lighter, almost like a bunch of hot air had just escaped through my ass, or wherever it was hot air usually escaped from. My entire body was also unusually tingly, and felt like a bunch of tiny insects were crawling around under my skin, causing my hair, and subsequently my fear, to rise.

If only it were bugs…

“What the fuck is happening to me?!” I screamed out in fear. “Why am I blue?!”

At this point, the horse known as Celestia decided to frown for a brief moment, and looked at me with deep concern and, for whatever reason, curiosity.

Author's Note

Okay, so I've been sitting on this chapter for almost two years. Figured it was about time I published it, and make my dramatic return to fimfiction.
I'm not really sure if people still want to read this, though if ya do, let me know in the comments. I'll definitely continue it if there's some kind of demand for it, though my life has been very busy lately, and I can't promises frequent updates.

I'm also going to test a shorter chapter system for a while, between 500-3000 words per chapter, just so I can get the creative juices flowing again. If everything works out fine, I'll try to hopefully write more in my off-time. But like, I've been super busy with pro gaming lately, that I've had no time to really write much of anything. Seriously, pro gaming is like, 5% actual gaming, and 95% studying game strategies and tactics. If I knew how much brain effort I'd have to put into this shit, I'd have gone into some other profession instead.