Chapter 1: The Literary Device
Perhaps to most ponies, this day would be a very ordinary day. A day in which nothing of note were meant to occur. A day where one would relax and say:
“What a beautiful morning!”
That was indeed what a certain lavender unicorn named Twilight Sparkle said as she stepped out of the Golden Oak Library. The mare had a smile on her face, a smile that one could only attribute to be on par with one famous pink party pony mare. If somepony who had known Twilight for a number of years… say her brother, Shining Armor, were to comment on that smile, he would say:
“That’s the same kind of smile that Twilight had when Spells and Potions for the Intrepid Mage IV came out.”
What indeed could brighten Twilight’s day even more than it already has? The weather was perfect. There were no disasters to be had. She had completed all her recent assignments and today she had woken up feeling refreshed and better than ever!
What else could brighten her day but a literary device?
That’s write. A typewriter.
You see, Twilight was about to take her first steps out into the wide world of Equestria, when her hoof came into contact with the mysterious literary device, with a soft metal clang. Intrigued, her gaze drew down in astonishment as she took in the magnificent device. A fully fledged typewriter complete with burnished copper metal, coated over with standard light olive paint and with a smooth matte aluminium finish on each binary key.
Twilight looked around. Perhaps somepony had accidentally left it on her doorstep, she didn’t remember ordering one.
Twilight telekinetically jostled it around in mid-air as she scrutinised every inch of the typewriter. There were no markings to indicate ownership to anypony…
At a flip, the unmistakable sound of flittering paper filled the air as a small scrap fell from the typewriter to lie calmly on the ground.
Oh, a note! Twilight thought excitedly. Perhaps it could help her find the owner.
However, the note did not contain a single word about the typewriter’s previous owners. Instead, it held a confusing statement.
Use with care.
Twilight snorted, what a superfluous note. Of course she would use it with care, all her equipment was treated with the utmost respect and care. Why, the last time she broke something was- okay it was yesterday but she fixed it just as quickly as she broke that flask! It wasn’t her fault that the potion exploded, the author had a glaring mistake in his annotation!
Twilight turned her attention back to the alluring features of the typewriter. Sure, she was a quill and ink mare herself but she had always wanted to try a typewriter.
Twilight squealed. Now she had one!
Twilight brought the typewriter to her study room as quickly as she could. She gently set the typewriter on her study desk and drew up a chair. Quickly, she primed the typewriter with some ink and made sure the ink roll was clear. Carefully, she ran a clean page through the typewriter, setting it to the correct position at the beginning of the margin. Twilight was mainly stocked in parchment but she always kept a sheaf of paper, just in case of paper emergencies.
Twilight felt a shiver of anticipation work her way up her spine and just she was about to bring her hoof to the cold metal of the typewriter key, she paused.
What exactly would she write about?
Perhaps a scientific report?
No, that was a little too dry for a first run.
Perhaps a news article?
But she couldn’t think of anything interesting to write about. The morning had only just started.
Perhaps a short story?
Twilight smiled. Of course! A small fiction never hurt anypony.
It was a fine morning in Ponyville. Twilight had enjoyed the brief rest she had from…
——
Twilight woke up with a start and found she had been at the desk with the typewriter for the greater part of the day. It was a shame because that day had had such nice weather. She found a blanket wrapped around her withers and felt a glow of grateful warmth for Spike. He must have found her dozing at the desk again. Still though, most of her day was gone and she could no longer visit her friends or organise for some orders on her checklist. She chided herself for getting too involved in the mysterious typewriter.
She chuckled.
Twilight was not a mare to let that little issue perturb her from enjoying the rest of the evening. She made her way down to the lower floor of the library, intent on thanking Spike for being so endearing.
Spike looked up from a comic he had been reading and quickly waddled over to Twilight, thrilled about something.
“Twilight, I’ve gotten a letter from the princess!” he yelled in excitement, drawing out a scroll from behind his back. He presented it proudly.
Twilight’s eyes widened.
“Oh thank you Spike! Would you like to read it out loud?” Twilight replied gratuitously.
Spike shook his head.
“I think you should take a look for yourself”, he said eagerly, pushing the scroll to Twilight again.
Twilight took the scroll in her telekinetic grip, breaking the seal and unfurling the parchment to reveal the contents within.
As she scanned the writing, she felt her eyes become wider and wider until they threatened to pop right out of their sockets.
“B-but h-how?!” she stammered, glancing between the letter and Spike.
Spike gave a good-natured shrug.
“Is it because you’re super smart and caring?” he replied as Twilight wrapped him in a hug.
“Oh that’s so sweet of you”, she mumbled, then broke apart practically dancing.
“I can’t believe I’m getting honoured with the Star Swirl Medal for Scientific Advancement!” she cheered, literally bouncing around the library in barely suppressed energy. She stopped mid-air.
“I have to tell my friends! I have to tell my parents! I have to tell my brother! I have to tell Celes- Wait she already knows, of course. I-I-I have to tell everypony!”
A sudden knock from the door, snapped Twilight out of her grinning stupor. She was still smiling even as she faced the two Royal Guards who bore deadly serious expressions.
“Miss Sparkle?” One of them addressed her, giving a cursory glance at her cutie mark to confirm.
Twilight felt her smile die down a bit. It came back in full force a little later when she noticed the two guards were pegasi.
“You must be the escort!” Twilight laughed in giddy joy, clapping her hooves together in glee.
“That’s right Detective, you’re needed to work on a series of robberies that have been happening all over Equestria”, the guard replied in a serious tone.
Twilight backed away from the door slowly.
“D-Detective Sparkle? Was I not getting the Star Swirl Medal for Scientific Advancement?”
The guard cocked his head inquisitively.
He drew out a letter from a small side-saddlebag as his partner spoke for him.
“No, Detective. We’ve been sent by the crown because frankly, you’re the best of the best. We need you back, Detective.”
A shuddering roar split through the ensuing silence of both parties. They darted out to the streets as one crowd to gaze horrified as a gigantic star studded Ursa Major came lumbering into the town.
A familiar showmare came running towards Twilight.
“Twilight!” Trixie shouted in an uncharacteristically humble tone, as the Ursa Major pounded just behind her. “I’m so sorry, only you could defeat this rampant Ursa Major!”
An Ursa Major? Right now? Impossible! Twilight thought shakily. A cold finger of dread skittered down her spine.
“Twilight Sparkle!” a voice called from above.
Twilight felt a few strands of hair pop out from their rightful place in her mane.
Twilight turned jerkily in time and saw Princess Luna land with a thud on the ground before her.
“Twilight Sparkle!” she repeated in a wheeze. “My sister has gone mad! She has devoured all the cake within Canterlot! You must help! Only your unique bond with my sister could possibly turn her back to the sister I know and love!”
“Twilight!” Twilight heard her name called once again and she snapped her head around to see her friends galloping to a stop before her. She dreaded what was coming.
“My mannequins have started moving on their own!” Rarity cried, flinging her hooves in the air melodramatically.
“My clouds have started to turn into ice!” Rainbow added, crossing her arms.
“My cakes have started to talk and they’re mean!” Pinkie shouted, holding out a chattering sample of confectionary.
“My animals have decided the invade Ponyville!” Fluttershy yipped, trying to ignore the a rat shaking its fist at her.
“Mah apples turned into pears!” Applejack growled, stomping a hoof. That one wasn’t so bad.
“Twilight!” They all begged.
“Twilight!”
“Twilight!”
“This can’t be real”, Twilight muttered to herself. “This can’t be real. It’s like straight out of-”
Twilight froze, a prickling sensation made its way up her forelegs.
“Fiction”, she finished, pushing desperately past the pleading ponies. She made it just inside the library and slammed shut the door, magically bolstering it with a small shield spell. The door bulged inward as the assorted mass of ponies banged their hooves on the door. Twilight looked nervously at the door for a moment but let loose a sigh of relief when she saw that the door held, just barely.
Twilight ignored the desperate cries of her friends as she scrabbled to her desk and grabbed the nearest piece of paper in her hooves.
The Ursa Major pounded through the town. Trixie cried for help as the claw swept downwards. Suddenly, Twilight was there, having teleported from Canterlot after hearing Trixie’s call for help. Banishing the Ursa Major with her advanced magical spells, Twilight saved the day-
Twilight groaned, the fiction was becoming all too real!
What could she do?
In a bout of desperation, she tore up the page, waiting for something to happen.
A few tense moments passed and neither the knocking or the shouts for help died down.
Twilight sagged, looking at the typewriter. She contemplated destroying it.
Then suddenly, the roar of the Ursa Major was cut off, mid-bellow.
Twilight’s eyes widened.
She quickly flittered about her room, finding and destroying as many pages of her demonic writing she could. Each sound of tearing paper filled her heart with guilt, but Twilight kept at it, crying tears of sadness. She must do this. She must be strong. For her friends. Page after page was decimated in a manic bid to end this madness.
Finally, as the last page was ripped, Twilight collapsed onto the floor of her study, sobbing.
A moment later, in a flash of light, Luna was there.
Twilight felt a hoof on her withers and she was grateful for the contact.
“There, there Twilight Sparkle”, the Princess of the Night consoled, stroking the distraught mare. “There, there.”
After a few excruciating minutes of crying her heart out for the souls of her lost stories, Twilight looked up gratefully from her prone position to regard the lunar goddess.
“Thank you, Princess Luna”, she whispered softly as Luna nodded in acceptance.
“That is quite alright, my little pony”, she replied giving Twilight an encouraging smile. “Take a few moments to rest and then we will deal with the crisis.”
It was then that Twilight realised that neither cakes nor Celestia had been in any of the stories she had written.
“Ah”, she croaked, feeling utterly drained. “Pony feathers.”
Author's Note
Hope you enjoyed that small piece as a distraction from me writing Just Roll With It.
I like making puns. Hope you enjoyed that plot device. Okay sorry, sometimes I think I'm funny but I'm not!
Next Chapter: Twilight finds out that one of her pages were not torn. It was a ship fic. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
As always, my honourable compadre readers, thanks for reading!
