Editorial Mandate

by LightOfTriumph

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Noteworthy, Comedy, Daring Do
Length: 1022

Noteworthy, A. K. Yearling's editor, is in a meeting with his client.

Hey. I'm Noteworthy. Right now I am having a discussion with my client and good friend A. K.

It is going to be a long... LONG day.

Dedicated to my editor Ephraim Blue on the occasion of his 16th birthday. The kid's almost five years younger than me, and a thousand times smarter. I hope this story about a long suffering editor will act as a modest and heartfelt thank you.

Published 2014-10-09 13:20:03 UTC
Last updated 2014-10-09 13:20:03 UTC

Editorial Mandate

"There's no new chapter," A. K. smiled. Looking straight at me.

My mind blanked. "What?"

"Nope!" A. K. smiled. "Not today, it isn't finished."

Now A. K. was a very good friend of mine, so leaping across my desk and killing her with my bare hooves wasn't wise, as tempting an option as that was. I just had to calmly explain to her that if I had to tell my bosses and her fans that the launch of the new book would have to be delayed ONCE AGAIN because of her writing process, there wouldn't be a creature that they wouldn't consider nasty enough to feed us to. Just keep your head, Noteworthy. Don't lose your head

"A. K.?" I asked calmly. "ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR DAMNED MIND?!?!" That "calm" thing was fun while it lasted, but I knew it couldn't last long...

"Would you keep your voice down?" A. K. hissed.

"Why?" I said. "Why do you keep doing this to me? Why do you even want an editor at this point when you give me nothing to edit?"

'Because I can't proofread worth a damn!" A. K. smiled.

"You got that right!" I held up a copy of her last chapter with more read on it then black. "I have an idea for the next book. Daring Do and the Quest for the Missing Apostrophe. You team up with the army of superfluous commas you summon from the ether to stop Auizotl from making the world forget that it's as in 'it is' as a funny mark that looks like a teardrop in it..."

"Yeah, yeah," A. K. laughed.

"You read Ancient Hieroglyphs better then you read plain equestrian," I said frankly. "You'd think that with all of the freakin' things you've read one of them would be a grammar textbook."

"I get it!" A. K. said giggling. "I can barely spell! We understand, now listen. It's going to be another week..."

"Another week?!"

"But I promise, it's going to be the best chapter I've written for you yet!" A. K. smiled at me.

"Will it be worth postponing the launch of the book to your insane fangirls?" I asked earnestly. "Keep in mind this will include the mare who broke into your impossible to find house and raided your stuff to find the manuscript. Will it be worth it to that crazy girl?"

"That's not what happened... exactly," A. K. protested.

"Did I get the 'broke into your house,' part wrong?" I asked sharply. "Because that's what happened A. K. I know. I had to spin it. And how did you respond to this felony invasion of privacy? You put the psycho in your next book! That didn't set a dangerous precedent at all! There have been seven more attempted break-ins. The problem is most ponies can't find your house. So what do they do?"

"They break into yours?" A. K. started awkwardly.

"They break into mine!" I responded emphatically. "I have had no less then nine of your psycho groupies in my house. All of them asking where to find you!"

"I can think of worse ways to meet Mares," A. K. smiled.

I was not amused. "I'll admit," I growled. "One of them would have been pretty cute if she wasn't CARRYING A KNIFE!!!"

"Oh...," A. K. said meekly.

I paced around the office and took a deep breath. "Okay," I said calmly. "I can't give the new chapter to the publishers. That's fine. Maybe I can give them a teaser for the book after this one. So what's the next book about?"

A. K. breathed sharply through her teeth. "Okay, Note?" she started slowly. "I'm gonna tell you this next thing, but you have to promise not to freak out, okay?"

I sat there with a plastic smile on my face, preparing to freak out.

"As of right now there are no plans for a next book.

At that moment I think I had a massive stroke. It was around the time that I remembered how to form consonants and vowels into words that I managed to eke out a solitary sound. "Whyyyyyy?" I wasn't sure if I was asking A. K. or cruel, cruel fate.

A. K. shrugged. "Nothing's been going on."

"'Nothing's b-," I sputtered. "Nothing's buh- You're DARING BUCKING DO!! Get something going on! Go find an ancient haunted artifact, rub your nose on it, and then be shocked when something bad happens! 'Daring Do and the Attack of the Snot Dripping Elder God!"

I dropped down crumpled on my desk. "Pills," I whimpered. "I need some kind of pills. Preferably Hydrogen Cyanide."

There was a pause, and then A. K. burst out laughing. "Oh wow, Note," she smiled. "You are fun to mess with!" She threw a stapled stack of paper on the ground. "Those are the next two chapters. One is early because I won't be here next week. I'm checking out a pyramid in Isla Burro. You should have more fun on your birthday, Noteworthy."

I was stunned. Even I had forgotten. "You remembered?"

A. K. smiled. "Of course I did," she said. "You're one of the few people on this planet I can call a friend. So I gave you something else, I proofread those myself. That should save you some time."

I was moved. As nuts as A. K. made me sometimes it was good to have her as a friend. "Thank you," I smiled. "I really do appreciate it."

A. K. smiled again, and left the room.

I looked down the first page and I noticed three errors on the first paragraph alone.

I giggled. "It's the thought that counts."

Author's Note

This is dedicated to my editor Ephraim Blue. Thanks man. I know it can't be easy dealing with my constant, grammar errors and use of, superfluous comma's and shoving the apostrophe where it shouldn't be!:derpytongue2: Happy (belated) birthday, man.

Remember writers, your editor is the only person who gets you unfiltered. Nopony deserves that. Give your editor a hug today. Let him know he's appreciated.

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