Big Blue and Little Pink: First of the Chosen

by DestinyQuill

Rating: teen
Tags: Crossover, Alternate Universe, Human, Dark, Comedy, Adventure
Length: 5467

A man turned into a centaur, what used to be a peaceful world of magic, and the minions of cruel gods attempting to destroy it. I've got to go and reunite these… Elements of Harmony, while fighting off monsters I've only ever seen in

Today started like any other day. Now this “Pinkie Pie” character is following me, talking almost non-stop, and a God wants to make me into her Champion. What use am I in a war between Gods, you may ask? No clue. All I know is that she likes my morals, and won't let me die completely if she can help it.

Now I've got to help reunite these “Elements of Harmony,” all while protecting an entire country from aliens I've only ever seen in video games, armed only with a magical GameBoy capable of letting me choose and give short-term superpowers to my partner, the zany mare who shares my soul and hers, Pinkie Pie, as well as my new half-human body and power of Sound. My, how a life can change.

For those that wish to know: Slow-building romance! Mares who hate him for being an upstanding, important male (gender oppression sucks)! Princesses who feel guilty for having caused unnecessary/necessary pain to an innocent! Someone Discord dislikes for being to chaotic while liking harmony! Utter insanity! Mega-morphing pony power! Random outbursts of music and pain! Applesauce! Changelings with Anorexia! Self-Directed Crossover to other stories involving Nikki's Angels!

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-10-15 17:06:27 UTC

Chapter 1: Birthday in the City - A New Friend Arrives!

Beyond the reaches of time and space, nine pulsating lights swirl around one another, orbiting a small, crystalline structure, which in turn rotates and shifts upon itself, almost like water, if water were sharp, stiff, and likely to liquefy anything to come into contact with it. Images of many worlds, times, and events flicker between them, like sparks from a fire, as tides of energy flow across and through the region.

“Fate is like water. Always changing, flowing, shifting… but there are tides and currents. Fate is a part of the river of Time, flowing from beginning to end in an endless force. Harmony binds it together, Chaos creates the waves, Life tends to follow along without protest. However, Life has a funny quirk. While sometimes it follows without question, other times it fights back; It'll forge it's own path, pushing against the norm to achieve greater things. Destiny may want them to die uselessly, but they may want to make a difference. Now, most of the time, Destiny will push back, and Life will eventually succumb to the oppressing force of Destiny. But, Life doesn't always work alone. With an outside force guiding it, Life can overpower Destiny and forge itself a new path. Such is the way of Reality.”

“Yeah, yeah, I get it. Now, I'm going to go chose my champions. I will defend Creation from those monsters, regardless of the consequences. By my powers, I shall prevail!”

“What of the lives of those you displace? You must choose those that Fate forgets, Sister.”

“That would require endless… Wait, I feel something. Hmm? This one… he has the moral standing to match your own, Brother. He feels… familiar… Ah! He is not aware, but he is in tune with the Element of Laughter! Perhaps She can interact with him?…”

“Time will tell, Sister. For the sake of all that is, was, and shall be, find your champions.”

“I will. I shall never let the fate that befell us repeat!”

----(|--Birthday in the City; Something Arrives!--|)----

BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEE-THUD!

A tinny voice echoes through the small apartment, rattling on about various events in the news, the weather, and the status of the strange electrostatic interference following a comet on a collision course with the New York Harbor. This too was soon silenced by a flailing fleshy form.

“Shut it, ya stupid radio. Tryin' ta sleep here... Wait. Radio... Radio shouldn't have gone off…”

The sound of a crank-wheel creeped through the room, and suddenly, my side-table's drawer burst open, a blast of confetti spreading through everywhere as small party blowers screamed at me, before a high-pitched voice, far too happy for the time of day, declared “Surprise! You got the day off! I'll see you later, Isaac.”

“Jenny, I will get you for this. Mark my words.” Upon saying such, a small sign swung down in front of my face, declaring the same message in child-like script. “Yeah...” I muttered, shoving the sign out of the way as I grabbed my favorite cobalt 'Party Time!' sweatshirt, and my sneakers, before stumbling out of my room towards the welcoming smell of flapjacks. For all the problems Jenny causes me, she is a great cook. She slid a plate stacked high with golden pads of heaven, then the syrup and butter, before chugging a coffee and flinging herself out the door. Grunting a 'goodbye' and grabbing my phone, I unlocked it just in time to receive a message.

'Duck, duck, little goose, lest your's be cooked.'

With a heavy sigh, I complied. Just in time, it seemed, as the lamp suddenly fell, it's cord swinging it right through where my head had just been. I dropped my phone in shock, as another message popped up, declaring 'Told Ya!' I ate my delicious flapjacks in silence, as I checked the sender. “377-746-5474? Not a recognized number...” Checking online got me no results... I gave up, slightly worried, as I grabbed my bag and wallet. Today seemed like a good day to wander through the city. I was planning to go watch the comet land, so why not? I tried to send a 'thank you' to my mystery savior (I'm a nice guy!), I got an 'Invalid Number' error. That didn't stop them from sending me a 'You're welcome!' With a shrug and a shudder, I left my apartment, locking the door behind me.

The elevator was out again, and twelve minutes later, I stepped out of the stairwell and into the lobby, only to hear from the manager that they'd fixed the elevator eleven minutes earlier. Biting back a curse, I thanked him and headed out the parking garage to grab my old, beat-up Teal VW Bug. As I reached for the door, I felt my knee twinge, and I instinctively dropped to rub it, as a bird flew by where my head had just been. “Okay, I'm officially scared.” Somehow, I've already dodged two head injuries through random luck.

“Laughter will make it better!” called that high-pitched voice, from the other side of the parking garage. I whipped my head around, and all I saw was a speaker shorting out in the distance, sparks shooting out from it and the nearby lights. Today is not shaping up to be a good sixteenth birthday. Dangerous, creepy, and nearly painful, if not deadly. Wonderful.

“… I'm… not sure what I was expecting, but this wasn't it.” The sky was clear for miles in every direction, meaning my telescope would be unhindered in my search for the comet. The beach was eerily empty, as the news had stated that anybody could come watch the comet's impact, so long as they left it alone. Yet, with the exception of a few sea birds, I was the only person I could see for miles. Setting up my telescope, I felt a strange urge to aim at the Northernmost edge of the visible sky. Unsurprisingly, it was devoid of any small comets or other space debris. I fiddled with my phone until I got the radio to play, looking for a hint as to where to look, before a message popped up.

'Look up by the Answer, and due Southeast.'

Figuring there was no point arguing with this surprisingly knowledgeable voice, I angled my telescope with my compass, before looking up to find the comet at exactly 42°. “Ah. That answer.” My phone chirped again, saying 'Bye and see you soon!' Ignoring the fact that someone was speaking to me when they really shouldn't have been able to, not to mention the fact the predicted and helped me avoid an event too spontaneous to have been pure luck, I sat back and watched the comet until it burned away, before packing up my stuff and pulling out a drawing pad. I scribbled for a bit, trying to think of something interesting to draw, before I noticed an odd glint at the shore. I wandered over, a found a cute little golden figurine, depicting a smiling four-legged cartoon character. I reached out to grab it, but when I touched it, I felt a massive shock before I collapsed onto the beach, my consciousness fading fast. I don't know if I fell asleep or fainted, but I soon left the world of the waking.

I looked around my new surroundings. Or, more accurately, the lack thereof. I was in a vast white expanse, yet I could still feel ground beneath my feet. Looking all around myself, spinning in place and looking above and below me revealed nothing but faint wisps of color, drifting through the void aimlessly. That is, until I moved to take a step.

The entirety of the realm I was in began to shake and flex, before the ground itself suddenly erupted into a torrent of earth and plant matter. Dust obscured my vision, and a deafening roar caused by the rending of the earth all around me filled my head. When it settled, I was standing in a tightly-woven forest, with a visible path before me. A sign sat just a few feet in front of me, reading 'Danger' while pointing ahead, and 'Safety' while pointing back. I was about to turn and head to whatever it deemed safety, when I heard a scream. Somebody was out there, and they needed help. Sure I was scared of the dark, possibly deadly forest, but somebody needed help, and they needed it soon. I sprinted into the 'Danger' section, taking turn after turn while running to where I heard the scream from. I could hear a horse running around, and every once in a while, another scream, before I finally burst through the final opening, and saw a figure made of shadow staring down at me. It had the whole 'Glowing red eyes and scary outlook' thing going on, and it held an over-sized butcher’s knife dripping with fresh blood. It vanished when I made to attack it, and I heard one final scream that ended in a dull thump. I dropped to my knees, the adrenaline fading away as my sprint caught up with me. “I… I couldn't… I couldn't save them… Just… just like with…” I felt my eyes begin to burn, as a wetness trickled down my face. Once again, I'd been there, and been unable to save someone. Just as I was about to scream at the heavens for taking another life I could have saved, I heard a noise.

A scared murmur, like that of a terrified child, sounded off behind me. I turned, and saw the golden statue, now large enough to have its eyes at my chest level, meaning it was roughly four feet tall. The base of the statue depicted a trio of balloons, and that mark also appeared on the flanks of the pony-esque creature, almost like a brand. A sudden glint caught my attention, and I leaned over to inspect it. The butcher’s knife was embedded in the back of the statue, and blood was trickling down from the golden body. I gently removed the knife, and saw the damage within. The statue had real blood inside, and I felt that it was in fact the thing that had screamed. I ripped off my shirt, and wrapped it around the body, then put pressure on to maybe stop the bleeding. It continued to pour in spite of my efforts, and I felt my eyes tear up again. Here was another life being lost that I should have been able to save. Something inside of me clicked. I turned my head towards the foreboding clouds above, and in defiance of all that is holy, pledged to not let another life end. I felt something break free from my body, and I instantly felt weaker. My back ached with a sharp, deep pain, but I felt the wound on the statue seal up. As soon as it did, the blood that had spilled flowed back over the statue, and sunk in, turning the surface pink. A new-found heat spread through the now fleshy statue, and it collapsed onto me, groaning in pain. My vision faded, as it’s large, baby-blue eyes focused on my face, surprise and fright still making the pupils contract.

The grating, repetitive shriek of some sort of machine dragged me away from the gentle caress of sleep, as my other senses kicked in and scrambled to piece together what was going on. Wrenching my eyes open only gave me a blast of very bright white light, probably electric if the faint buzz was to be believed. I could feel thin, smooth sheets covering my body, now severely lacking in clothes, and I scrunched up my nose at the scent of ammonia and gauze, the signature blend of stimuli bringing to mind one specific, slightly fear-inducing word. 'Hospital.' I hated the hospital. Every time I've gone to one, I've had to face severe pain for some reason or another, often with very inefficient or clumsy doctors having to do more work, more painfully, and then charging me ridiculous amounts for their failures. I heard faint voices beyond, and I tried to get my eyes to adjust to the light. Why they paint these places bleach white and stuff them full of overly bright lights is beyond me. When my eyes had finally adjusted, I was met by a peculiar sight. I was in the hospital, there were doctors all around… but that pony I'd seen in my dream was curled up next to me like a cat. The doctors and nurses completely ignored her, scribbling away on various clipboards, checking on other patients, and basically going about their business as if there wasn't a brightly colored pony acting like a cat while nestled up against one of the patients. I stared at the pony, who began to stir before raising it's head with a yawn, and looking around while frowning at the strange room, before noticing my stare. I reached towards it slowly, and it watched my hand in confusion, before glancing over at me with a smirk. It shoved it's head into my hand, and nuzzled me as I sat there in shock. A doctor glanced over, and called out to me.

“Hey, you're awake! We couldn't get you to drop that plush, if you were wondering. Welcome back to the world of the living, Isaac.” I stared at the pony, then at the doctor, the back the pony.

“Wha…” I croaked, my throat too sore and dry to sound normal. “What the hell… happened to me?” I burst into a coughing fit as he brought me a cup of water. “Thanks.”

“You were struck by lightning, it seems. A storm was brewing around the destination of that meteorite, and you were in the wrong place at the wrong time. They found the source, by the way. Some sort of electromagnetically charged radioactive crystal. It was on the news, you'll probably be able to see it later.”

“Umm… can I go home now?” The doctor gave me an incredulous look.

“I'm afraid not. You'll need to stay here so we can keep an eye on you. You did just have a near-death experience, after all. I'll call the nurse in with your things, though.” He turned and began tapping on a tablet mounted by the door, presumably to get said nurse.

A little nagging feeling at the back of my mind got my attention. “What about my car?”

“Your emergency contact… Jenny? Jenny took care of it for you. It's fine.” As he said that, the pony looked over to the door, drawing my attention to it as well. The nurse immediately stepped in, and I found my clothes were fine, save for a burn on the back of the jacket, shaped like four sharp-edged whorls. I figured I'd patch it in white when I got home, to keep both the awesome new mark I got in a freak event, and the sweatshirt I've had since big sis Reyna died. Just another memory in the fabric. I felt a strange pounding sensation, and I noticed the needle in my arm giving me something. I glanced over to the doctor, who seemed hazy and distant, as he mouthed the word 'sleep' over and over. The pony cuddled up against me, its body heat helping me to relax as I slipped into chemically-induced sleep. Hopefully my slight fear of hospitals won't rear its ugly head… Ah, who am I kidding. Of course it will.

I was back in the hospital, but the doctors and nurses were gone. I got up and walked towards the window, seeing as it was too dark and wet to see anything but flickering pairs of lights through the multiple panes of glass I was sure I was looking through. Those couldn't be millions of eyes in the dark. They had to be city lights! … I backed away from the window, and turned to see the door knocked off its hinges, with a oval-shaped imprint about two feet up from the base. I shrugged it off, assuming 'Battering Ram' before peeking my head out into the hall. One way led to a blood covered mess, the other led into eerie, all-consuming blackness that seemed far too dark to be normal. Deciding blood was better than whatever could be in that hall, be it sharp broken glass, needles, or some sort of maniac waiting to remove my body parts in painful ways, I turned to the crimson smeared hall, and began looking for a way out. Many cracked windows dotted the extensive wall, though those that revealed the contents of their rooms did so only in flashes, revealing lurking shapes that could have been human, but just as likely were machines. Yes, machines, not large creatures capable of completely rending the flesh from my body, the blood from my flesh, and my soul from the remaining essence. Surely that wouldn't happen! … I sprinted down the hall, keeping my head down and my arms crossed in front of me.

That's when I heard the scream.

Ever since the car accident that took the lives of so many… my parents, Jenny's parents, and Reyna… at least that drunk bastard got what was coming to him… He survived, and got life in prison for technical homicide, as well as DUI. I always wondered what would have happened if I had been able to help them. I hated myself for having been unable to help in the accident. Jenny took over my care-taking in a battle of foster parents and custody, being the closest living 'family' member and being mentioned in the will eventually won out, though. She acted as a annoying big sister sometimes, but she could be motherly from time to time. Most of the time, she was just a good friend. But in spite of the way my life worked to become normal again, I still hated hearing screams. I associated them with pain, fear, and the need for a hero. Something I doubted I could ever be.

I sprinted down the remainder of the hall, and found a strange sight, to say the least. The pony was strapped to an operating table on the other side of the only lit, unblemished window I'd seen as of yet. She seemed to be hyperventilating, if her rapidly pulsing chest was anything to go by. There was a small amount of blood on her hooves, implying she may have been walking through the hall or room beforehand. I looked at her face, searching for any sign of trauma, when I noticed her shrunken pupils. When before I'd seen her eyes, they were bright and full of life. Now they seemed small, almost as if she was hiding them.

I stepped up to the glass, and her eyes widened upon noticing me. She opened her mouth, but seemed too tired and frightened to actually make noise; she simply breathed heavily as she pleaded with me for rescue with those brilliant sky-blue eyes of hers. Looking around, I found a fire extinguisher halfway out of its compartment, and soon I was hammering on the glass, attempting to break through.

BOOM BOOM *crick* BOOM BOOM *Crack* BOOM BOOM BOOM *CRUNCH* BOOM BOOM KABOOM! The glass spread across the floor, as I swung the extinguisher around to clear a large enough space to climb in and out, possibly carrying the pony. Stepping around behind her, I found the release for the table's straps, and putting an arm across her chest, deactivated it. Faster than I could blink, the pony wrapped itself around my body, hugging me as it sobbed openly, fear and relief finally getting through to her.

I gently carried her out of the room, only to find a new horror. From behind each of the windows, thumping could be heard. Whatever had been in those rooms before had seen me destroy a window, and now they were attempting it. The pony looked on in confusion, as my eyes flitted back and forth in fear. CRICK! Hearing a window begin to break snapped me out of my fear, and I held the pony closer as I turned and sprinted down the hall, away from the breaking windows and the darkness that seemed to be following me. I was glad the pony weighed so little, she felt like my backpack as she clung to me for dear life. We soon reached the end of the lengthy hallway, and it split down two directions.

I was almost going to go right, before the pale, spindly arm reached out. I screamed 'Nope' repeatedly as I quickly made my way away from that horror, flinging myself and the pony down the left hall. Taking a risk in the fairly empty hall, I glanced behind me. Such horrors do not belong on this mortal plane, I tell you. Bloated bodies, spiked limbs, body parts reshaped, re-positioned, and re-purposed. They had vaguely human characteristics, but they were no longer supposed to be among the living. Some scuttled along the ceiling like monstrous crabs of death, others hung from the walls or scurried along the floor, all sprinting after me. The pony started to turn when one yelped, but I gave her a slight shake of my head to say 'NO.'

Turning back to the hall, I found it was soon going to end. Rather abruptly, I might add. The ceiling had given out under what appeared to be a helicopter, or at least, most of a helicopter. There were no turns to take, no windows to break, and the pony wouldn't have made it through the helicopter without my help. I decided that with my dying breath, she would, at least hopefully, live. I flung her into the cockpit through the open front, and with a sad smile, I turned to meet my fate. I looked at the swarm of monsters as they ran for me. I closed my eyes, and felt the blades dig into my flesh…

Before a blast of light and sound filled my senses. The blade withdrew from my stomach, and I opened my eyes to see an astounding new development. The pony had found the weapons controls, it seems, as the chain guns began pouring lead into the mess of angry broken flesh in front of me. It slowly began to melt away into another crimson smear, before the ammunition finally ran out, leaving the guns clicking until they jammed, and all was quiet again.

Drip… Drip… Drip… Drip… Floppa-thud.

I dropped to my knees as my strength faded, my stomach burning from the gash and impalement. I looked up to see the crying pony, as she nuzzled me, trying to get me to stand. I just shook my head, pointing down at the hole in my body. She looked at it, and glared.

Then she opened her mouth. I expected a growl, or a whinny, maybe even a whine. I did not expect the tear-filled voice to come from her all-too human maw. “NO! I will NOT lose this friend! He saved my life twice already, so I will do my BEST to keep him ALIVE!” she screamed, as her body began to glow. She drifted into the air, as if held by the wind itself, before her entire body burst into brilliant blue light. A single tendril of energy drifted down into my chest, wrapped itself through my body, and I felt something shift. The pony dropped down as my stomach stopped burning, and I lunged over to catch her. Whatever she'd just done must have taken a lot out of her, because she had fainted with a simple, gentle smile on her face. I held her close as I faded, wanting nothing more than to keep this sweet pony safe, even if it meant being impaled by another flesh monster. She would survive, just to spite the cruel gods that chose to end my parents.

A week went by, Jenny visited a few times, keeping to her job in the meantime. The Pink One, for the most part, slept peacefully. Every once in a while, she'd start to thrash about, likely trapped in some new nightmare, but I'd help her settle down, by petting her and holding her close. The doctors came in sporadically, talking about muscle damage around my legs, and how I was apparently growing a large amount of hair. They claimed the small dosage of steroids they were giving me would on occasion excite the many follicles of hair covering my legs, rather than merely helping the muscles to regrow while I went through therapy. I waved off their concerns, as the hair problem didn't really bother me.

On the eighth day of my recovery, I was told I could return home, so long as I kept up my stretches and daily jog, as I'd recovered quickly, and needed only to make sure my legs stayed in top shape for a month to make sure everything was fine. I tucked the still snoozing pony into my nearly empty backpack, and headed out into the bustling midday commotion of grand ol' New York City. We soon arrived at the apartment, where Jenny stood waiting. I gave her a hug, as is tradition when one of us got back from being gone a long while, before heading into my room. I carefully lifted the Pink One out of my bag, and carried her into the living room. Finally, I flopped down on the couch, petting her as she began to stir. Her head shot up, and she looked around frantically.

“Huh? Where's… oh, there you are Isaac. I thought you were gonna die! That big meanie-pants stuck a big bony blade through your belly, and you were bleeding, and… I THOUGHT I LOST YOU!” she wailed, jumping up to hug me as I held her in my arms. I tried to help her calm down, mumbling quietly as I soothed the wailing pony. That is, until I heard a chuckle from the recliner across the room.

'So, you are the first she found. Mother will be most pleased with your moral standing.'

I stared at the new arrival in my bedroom, having heard the voice, in spite of the fact her mouth had not moved, and my ears only heard the continuous wailing of the Pink One. “Bwa?” I managed, my brain trying to catch up with the new revelation of 'SHE JUST USED TELEPATHY,' and other such confusing thoughts. Then a ringing sound could be heard, and I looked around in confusion, before looking back at the strange woman. She was shaking slightly… she jingled… “Are… Are you… giggling?” I asked, now entirely confused.

'Why yes, I am. You are most amusing, sir Isaac.'

“Why?” Whoever this was easily creeped me out, and yet she also made me feel calm. Like, angry wild animal protecting you from some loon carrying a gun kind of calm. It was weird, but she had a soothing aura emanating from her body.

'I am Laughter, daughter of the goddess Aquarius, and spiritual guardian of any and all bearers of the Element of Laughter, my namesake. Your new companion, Pinkie Pie, knows what I refer to. I was sent here to administer the test of character, but the Dark ones have already begun. You were only to face a simple challenge, young Pinkie, as were you, Isaac. Yet the Dark ones interfered, attempting to end your lives. You pushed through in spite of the adverse nature of the challenges, and proved your moral standing.'

“Let me get this straight, 'Laughter.' You're saying we both risked our lives, and nearly DIED, as a TEST!?” I screamed, glaring at the confusing woman in front of me. That is, until Pinkie stuck her head out in front of my face. She glared into my eyes, but she still smiled. I felt… calmer, with her staring at me. I gave her a hug, and when I let go, she looked back at me.

“Isaac, you heard her, right? She said that she was gonna give us some tests, but some big ol' meanie pants guys made the tests go wrong. They were just gonna be simple, but instead they got all bad and scary. We made it through, I got a new friend, and we can have a big party 'cause we made it through the scary tests and lived!” she declared, somehow all in one breath. She then gave me a big hug, which I gladly returned. Still, something was bugging me.

“Well, I suppose so. But… Laughter? Why were we going to go through the tests anyway?” Laughter gave me a hard look, then sighed, her shoulders drooping as she did.

'If things in the Aether were going better, you wouldn't have had such problems. Being that this is not Aquarius's realm, she was forced to… improvise…'

The mood of the room seemed to darken as she said this. I pulled Pinkie in close, becoming wary of Laughter. “What do you mean, 'improvise'?” I asked, as Pinkie nuzzled me.

'What do you know of Destiny, Isaac?'

I snorted at her. Pinkie glanced up, but curled into a ball on my lap. I started petting her, while staring at Laughter. “What is Destiny? A miserable little pile of convenient excuses.” I had a vague feeling I just made a joke, and the Pinkies's snickering didn't really help.

'Hilarious. Though, I can see where you'd get that impression from, with how your kind treats that ideal. Destiny has always been, and always will be. Certain things will happen whether you move to fight or help them. However, your actual Fate is not set in stone. For example, a frog may be destined to be eaten by a Heron. His Fate may be to survive and fight back, to die by the Heron's beak, or to have died beforehand due to some random event. Destiny is as real as Time, and more solid than stone, but it doesn't always mean what it may appear to mean.'

“Okay, I'll give you that one. Back to the topic at hand, though… What does this have to do with Pinkie and me?

'Pinkie's Destiny has yet to be fulfilled. Yours, however… You had a dark Destiny. You were to be stuck down at a young age, and yet, here you are. That lightning strike killed you.'

“You… you mean I… Died?”

'That depends on your definition of death. Yes, you did 'die', but by the powers of the Element of Laughter and Aquarius herself, you were saved. We need your help, Isaac. We denied Destiny, and as such, Reality itself will attempt to eradicate you. The longer you remain here, the more it will fight to remove you.'

“Remove me? But… But I didn't do anything wrong!”

'Indeed. You have two options. One: Leave this realm, and never return. You will get to live, remain with Pinkie, as she doesn't belong here either, and become the Champion of a God.'

“What if I want to stay here?”

'The other option, allowing you to remain in this world, will result in something I doubt you'd wish to happen. As Reality fights to remove you, it will push harder and harder to do so. You will eventually die, likely in a cataclysmic event that may take the entirety of your world with it. You are currently a proverbial 'bug' in the system of Reality. You should not exist, and the Lord of your realm has been gone for a long while, and is not likely to return, so he cannot make the necessary changes to allow you to remain. If you truly care for the denizens of this realm, you will need to leave. You cannot stay here.'

“… Fine. I'll go. If you really need my help, then fine. I just need to say goodbye.” Pinkie and Laughter stared at me in shock. Laughter looked like she was preparing to fight against me in an argument, and Pinkie… I don't even know how she got that coffee cup, but she pulled a full spit-take and let her jaw drop. I gently set her down beside me, and turned to head into the kitchen… when I saw Jenny, jaw hung loosely from her face, utter shock leaving her dead to the world. Crap. Ya know? I'd hoped for a normal, maybe casual sixteenth birthday. Now I've apparently died, been saved by a god, and been chosen to become a Champion. If this was where my life was headed… I dread to see what will come next.