Hey you.

Yes you. Come closer.

See this lovely stallion behind me? Those are custom-made wheels right there. And that seat? Pure velvet, imported from the Griffin Kingdom.

Still not convinced? This stainless steel frame can take the weight of five thousand ponies. Why would you need that many ponies on one bike? We don’t care, we did it anyway!

For just the low low price of ninety-nine, ninety-nine bits, this beautiful beast can be all yours.

And what’s more, order today and receive your own ‘Tirek Bell’. Now you can drain your enemies magic as you pass by them!

Order now

Co-authored with Warewolves. An awesome writer who you should totally check out! Do it >_<