Proper Science

by Tailgate

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Adventure, Crossover
Length: 2316

Twilight knows nothing about science. Obviously these guys do.

Twilight has encounters of the Kerbal kind. Perhaps she could learn what true science is from the masters themselves.

Contains unicorn Twilight.

Chapter 1 proofread by lebowski42.

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2014-10-11 15:10:03 UTC

1 - Sometimes, the rocket is invented before the wheel.

        Laying under the cool shade of a mighty oak, Twilight was engulfed by her text on species indigenous to Gryphonia. The ground was sparsely littered with fallen leaves stained the colors of fall. A large, empty field sat to one side of her, and to the other side, the path through the Everfree forest that led back to Ponyville.

        Twilight smiled at the sound produced by the crisp page of her book when she turned it. All her usual distractions were absent; No ponies bothering her, no duties from the princess, and most of all, no disasters of global proportions.

        She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, enjoying the sweet scents of the changing seasons. She opened her eyes as a Robin flew past her. The swift little bird danced through the sky, leaving Twilight to watch with admiration.

        The long sound of beating wings was then dominated by screeches of fear and alarm as a swarm of various birds streaked overhead. Twilight’s gaze followed them in confusion. She pulled herself up off the ground as they disappeared from sight.

        She spun her head around and scanned the forest for whatever caused the birds to flee. With her magic, she lifted up her book and took note of her spot before she gently shut it and held it by her side.

        Twilight felt uneasy, unsure if it was merely something as small as a fallen tree that spooked the avians or if a predator was skulking the woods. She stood silently, glancing between the sky and the Everfree forest, stuck deciding of taking a risk and entering the forest with the chance of encountering whatever it was or staying by the field through sundown and nightfall.

        Twilight trotted to the forest tree line as she evaluated the pros and cons of staying versus leaving. Just under the cover of trees, her body froze as a new sound caused her ears to perk up in attention.

        A sound unheard of which she had never before heard reached her ears and forced fear into her heart. A low rumble could be heard in the distance. Alarmed and scared, Twilight dropped her book on the ground and ran behind a tree to huddle down and hide.

        With her hooves tucked under her and her rump sticking up in the air, her breathing picked up its pace as the once dull noise turned to a roar. A roar that passed just above the tree cover.

        Twilight gasped as specks of a bright light cut through some of the upper leaves of the forest she hid in. She stared in shock and surprise as the light slowed down and finally stopped just outside the tree line.

        Picking her vulnerable and exposed form up that even a possum would sigh and shake his head at, she crawled close to the short grass that grew in the surrounding area. Crouching just behind one of the final trees at the edge of the forest until the trees scattered at the border between itself and the field, Twilight peered up to look at the light.

        Her blood froze as a new wave of fear rode down her spine. With an involuntary shiver, Twilight dropped to the ground and kept her eyes on the large metallic cone that lowered to the ground.

        She could feel the roaring of the flames spilling out from underneath it alongside the beating of her own heart. Thoughts raced through her mind as to what it was. Thick smoke followed its path down as it lowered to the ground.

Four circular bars lowered from the side of the machine and extended in length. At the ends of each were circular pads that formed the bottom of the quadpod. The fire that spewed from beneath it slowly died out as it got closer and closer to the surface.

Her fear relinquished its power over her as curiosity took its place in her mind.

The fire beneath machine cut out, causing it to drop the last few feet. Twilight’s ears twitched as the suspension system of the machine creaked when it impacted the ground.

Still hiding behind the tree, she stared at it in a mix of apprehension and interest. A small block at one side of the machine popped out and dropped a singular pole covered in small steps that lead up to the outline of a square in the side of the machine.

The outlined square popped out of it and was pushed open by a small orange arm. Twilight held her breath as she watched a small orange figure with a large white helmet streaked with red stripes and some sort of see-through material at the front step out of the machine and go down the extended ladder.

Two more of its distinct features was that it had black boots and blue straps on its orange jumpsuit that appeared to be some sort of harness. The bipedal creature itself stood at just below her neck.

Once it reached the bottom of the ladder, it lifted an arm and gave the hatch entrance a thumbs up. It then waddled a few steps away from the flying machine and pulled out a metallic pipe.

Twilight let out the breath she had forgotten she was holding and internally calmed herself down as she watched the creature plant the pole in to the ground. The pole itself then proceed to extend vertically and pop out a little flag adorned with a symbol that resembled the machine and what looked to be writing of some sort.

The first creature was then joined by another as it jumped out of the hatch entrance instead of using the ladder. Twilight jumped as she saw some sort of gas coming out of a small box on its back as it plummeted and then bounced on the ground.

Her eyes snapped opened as she watched slack-jawed as it literally bounced off the ground, landed on it’s front, and after a few seconds of no movement, pull itself up. She gasped for a second time as she caught a glimpse of its face as it turned.

        Past the glassy-material of its helmet’s visor was a cylindrical head that was almost sickly green in color with dark fur of some sort on top in a neatly trimmed pattern. Two large, bulging eyes with large black dots as pupils and no visible irises looked around curiously. It also had a wide mouth that stretched from one side of it’s face to the other, almost always in a shape that appeared to be smiling.

        Twilight tried to tuck herself further behind the tree as it’s gaze haphazardly scanned the forest she hid in. She sighed in relief as it turned back around and joined the first one in doing something. Squinting her eyes to try and get better contrast between the creatures and their backdrop, she watched as the first one bend down and scoop up some dirt with its hand.

        The second one walked up beside the first and watched as the first waddled back to the flying machine, climbed up the ladder, and into the ship. Shocked, Twilight sat in silence. She pondered their actions and how they arrived.

What are those? What are they doing? It looks like they are collecting samples…

        Twilight watched as the creature pulled out a small device and started waving it around and pressing buttons on it. It then pulled out a small notepad and a pen from a pocket. It placed the device on the ground and whilst looking at the device, the creature wrote something down on the note pad.

Are those… scientists? First contact with aliens andthey’re scientists!

        Twilight leaped up from the ground with enthusiasm and started a brisk trot over to the creature that stood near the flag the first had placed.

        Twilight gave it a merry grin and spoke to gain its attention, “Hi there! I’m Princ-”

The creature turned around to look at her. Seeing her, its face contorted to one with a twinge of fear and it started doing a combination of running and waddling back to the machine’s ladder whilst yelling something.

“Ayda! Jeb! Bob!” It waved its stubby arms frantically at the base of the ladder.

Twilight held out a hoof and visibly winced when it ran away, “Oh- Please don’t run! I just want to talk!”

        Two round heads poked out the hatch entrance. Twilight sat still as the faces of the two aliens examined her. One with a wide grin on its face and the other with a look of pure elation.

        The two of them climbed down and joined the third one at the base of the ladder. The latter of which pointed at Twilight and spoke, “Quo za daht?”

        The one that Twilight had seen scooping up dirt shrugged and turned to face her. It latched onto the sides of its head with it’s stubby little hands.

        Twilight wondered what it was about to do until a loud click was heard and its helmet came off its suit.

        Twilight got a better look at the creature underneath it’s helmet. It was almost completely furless except for the short patch that wrapped around and on the top of its head.

The creature handed its helmet to one of the other creatures which then threw the helmet and the device which had been left on the ground into the flying machine. The former then stopped in front of Twilight and waved at her with a grin to rival Pinkie Pie.

        She lifted her head back up and waved back at the creature, “Hello there! Like I was trying to say earlier, I’m Twilight Sparkle! I had watched you land and I saw you take some samples, I presume you’re scientists?”

        Without losing its eerily smile, it gave her a thumbs up, “Science!”

        Twilight then tilted her head and asked the creature, “Who are you?” -Twilight pointed a hoof at herself- “I’m Twilight Sparkle.”

        It pointed at Twilight, “Twilight?”

        Twilight shook her head eagerly and practically screamed with joy, “Yes! Twilight!”

        The two creatures behind the original started to repeat Twilight and they pointed at her while the one without the helmet in front of the other two pointed at itself and stated, “Jeb,”- Jeb then pointed at the one which Twilight had seen second -”Bill,” - he lastly pointed at the third -”Bob.”

        Twilight looked at the three of them and pointed a hoof at each one as she recited their names, “Jeb, Bill, Bob.” She received nods from each as she pointed them out.

        Now unsure of what to say, Twilight stood silently until Jeb started waddling towards her.

        “Zuna jav Science!” He said as he stopped in front of her and poked her chest.

        Slightly stunned by the physical contact so easily given by Jeb, Twilight looked up at the sky and took note that she had about an hour till sunset. She then nodded at Jeb and asked, “You want to see my science?”

        Jeb nodded furiously and gave her his trademarked grin. He turned around and started waddling over to his ship. When Twilight did not follow him, he turned to her and motioned for her to follow.

        Curious and with her fears extinguished from their common love of science, she followed him to the base of the ladder. Both Bill and Bob had climbed up the ladder as she had approached it. Not entirely sure how she was going to get up to join them, she waited outside.

        She admired the sleek and slightly dented metal exterior of the ship. Now that she was closer, she could see a small window pane on one side of it. She could also see the machine part that had spewed out the fire. Unsure how it worked, she resigned to staring at it until Jeb spoke up from the top of the ladder.

        “Fulleh!”

        He motioned for her to climb up, apparently oblivious to her predicament. Resigning to at least trying, Twilight trotted up to the ladder and started climbing. Carefully placing each hoof on a bar and wrapping her forelegs around the ones above her, she slowly climbed up the ladder and into the machine.

Inside the small compact space sat three chairs, two of which were occupied. The first chair was in front of a control panel loaded with buttons and a single thrust lever. Also on the panel were several displays, each unreadable to Twilight. The other two seats were placed on opposite sides in the middle of the flying machine, each surrounded by various storage compartments.

        She trotted to the center and sat down. Jeb waddled over to one of the storage compartments and opened it up. Reaching inside, he brushed the soil he had collected onto his glove and waddled over to Twilight.

        Dropping it and then pointing at the fallen dirt, he stated, “Science.”

        Twilight looked down at it and then back at Jeb. Slightly disappointed, she frowned, “Is that it? No more science besides this dirt?”

        Jeb smiled and clapped, “Science!”

        Twilight wondered exactly what creatures had stumbled upon the technology to travel through the sky without wings but still saw the study of dirt as an exciting branch of science.

        In that moment of her lack of attention, Jeb had shut the hatch and strode over to the last unoccupied seat and pushed a button, “Sani jav une science! Irrel tor trek!”

        A crackle split the air and a voice responded, “Ujer, vont.”

        Twilight glanced up at the ceiling looking for the speaker but found no one as Jeb slammed the thrust handle forward, kickstarting the ignition of the ship’s rocket thruster and sending Twilight sprawling across the floor as she futilely attempted to grab on to something to hold