GTA 5 : Cleverpony (Prologue)
Once upon a time, GTA had an Easter egg inside it. However, not many people knew its existence. The reason why only few of them knew is unknown. However, some stupid people had managed to get their hand on the Easter egg anyway.
But little did they know... they're... - well, who's care - here is a story of them in a land of pony.
It was a beautiful morning in Los Santos city. The sun raised and gave a epic view of an owl man in a red jacket on the top of skyscraper.
"Alright, men. We're gonna go to an adventure." the owl man said. "It's gonna be fulled with fun, danger, challenge and stupidly. We're gonna have the most fumiest adventure the man ever dreams! Some of us may not return, but it doesn't matter. We will seek the greatest thing ever beyond this Los Santos city."
Four gamers were standing behind Vanoss. First was Delirious in a hockey mask and blue jacket, Next was Wildcat in a pig mask and white motorcycle helmet with his gangster jacket, beside was Basically in a black monkey mask with panther pants and yellow shirt, and Nogla was an ugly man in a green shirt and fake diapers.
"So it's-"
"Shut da f*ck up." Wildcat yelled.
Vanoss paused for awhile...
"It's a-"
"Shut da f*ck up."
"Shut up, Wildcat!" Vanoss turned to Wildcat. "Why you interrupt me, I'm trying to make a video here."
"I don't give a sh*t." Wildcat said. "By the way, how did we get up here?"
"We got here on helicopter, dumbass!" Marcel said. Vanoss laughed.
"Aren't we here to find an Easter egg?" Delirious said.
"I dunno, I thought you guys know!" Vanoss said.
"Well, let's get into our real deal before it get off the rail again." Nogla said. "Well, we heard there is some sort of Easter egg around here, so we're gonna find and paint some sh*t it."
"Yeah, but without paint our sh*t on it" Basically said. "Well, if there is a GTA Easter egg we haven't found yet, it's probably already rotten right now." Delirious laughed.
"Okay, anyone here know what the f*ck Easter egg is!" Vanoss said and laughed shortly.
"No / No, I don't care. / I just followed you." Everyone said.
"So why don't we go to a store and buy some sh*t instead?" Wildcat said.
"Welp... that's sound like it's gonna go in our clip..." Vanoss said.
"Okay, everyone, follow me to the store! Weeee~!" Wildcat yelled and jumped off the ledge, but nobody followed.
Vanoss put out a sniper rifles. He waited until Wildcat pulled out a parachute, then Vanoss sniped him. Wildcat died and hit the ground like a brick.
(*SPLAT*)
Everyone burst out of laughing, except Wildcat. "Oh lord, that was good." Vanoss said. "Alright, guys. Hop in the helicopter. We're gonna get down from here and find the Easter egg."
"Yeah, let's go/ Yaaaay, to the store." Everyone said and entered the helicopter. Delirious went to the pilot seat while other sat in the cabin.
"You guy are f*cking a**hole. I hate you guy. God dam'it" Wildcat said.
The helicopter later found as a wreck in front of a clothing store. The cause was Wildcat tried to bombed Vanoss helicopter with his launcher while Vanoss and Delirious fought on pilot seat. The result was everyone had died and they had to waste their time walking back to the store
"Yay~ we made it." Delirious said.
"Well, after we wasted completely twenty minutes just to get here." Vanoss said.
"Guy, look! I found an Easter egg suit!" Delirious said.
"What!" Vanoss said. Everyone deadpanned when they saw Delirious.
"That's a ugly green suit from another DLC, your stupid f*ck!" Wildcat said. Everyone laughed.
"Oh god, really! I wasted a lot of my money on this one!" Delirious said.
"That's your own fault." Wildcat said. "Alright, Let's go ham now. We will going - To - find that aged Easter egg."
"Yeaaaaah!" Everyone cheered.
"So, where is it?" Vanoss said.
"I don't know." Wildcat said. "I think you all know we're just pretending"
"What!!" Vanoss said. "You didn't tell me!"
"Yes, I did telling you, you retard!" Wilcat said. "I said it, like few seconds ago."
"I've just joined the game!" Vanoss said.
"Because you tried to get that cinematic bullsh*t and didn't listen to us, so you deserved it." Wilcat said.
"Yes, you too, Delirious. You distracted us with that stupid suits." Basically said.
"Yes, I do... What! How!" Delirious said.
"So, there is no aged Easter egg?" Vanoss said.
"You should listen to us, Evan" Basically said.
"Okay, I'm sorry." Vanoss said.
"Then stop fooling around, a**hole." Wilcat said.
"So, why we're here in the first place?" Delirious said.
... (*Akward Silence*) ...
"Oh / Oh well..." everyone muttered.
"Hey, everyone, what's that?" Vanoss said.
"Don't fool arou - OH WOW." Wilcat said. "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SH*T!!?"
"Oh, I have never noticed that thing before!" Delirious said.
"Okay, seriously," Nogla said. "Stop acting like we didn't notice it before this session."
"Haha, I'm sorry." Vanoss said.
At the beginning, Wildcat had been the first one who found 'the Easter egg' in GTA. He had invited his friend to see it. the Easter egg was a black arch at across of the clothing shop. They surrounded the arch and looked closely.
"Alright, it's time to get real!" Vanoss announced.
"Yeaaaaah!" everyone cheered.
"As you can see. This conjoined dildos is an Easter egg here in GTA 5." Vanoss said. Everone laughed suspiciously.
"It's a miracle." Wildcat added.
"It's so beautiful, man." Delirious said.
"It looks like a modern art." Nogla said.
"Are you sure it's not here before?" Vanoss said.
"I can't remember, but a curved turd like this is probably hard to go unnoticed." Wildcat said. "Or probably we're just retarded, so... yeah."
"Is it a decoration?" Basically said.
"Yeah, It's the most ugly decoration I've ever seen." Vanoss said.
"Hey, what's this?" Delirious said and touched the arch.
(*BOOM*)
"WHAT THE F*CK!!" Delirious yelled.
"OH Sh*t! tons of fairy dust is coming out from the turd!" Wildcat said.
"Oh my god, my game is lacking like a bitch!!" Vanoss said.
"Sh*t, my game is gonna crash!" Nogla said.
"Claim down, claim down, people." Vanoss said. "Everything is gonna be just fineeeeeeeeeee! NO!!"
"It's not FINE!! Everybody Panic!!" Basically yelled.
"No no no no no no no no, please NO!" Wildcat said. The team couldn't get up. They were pushed around. After the blast had stopped, a cloud of sparkle golden dust was covered their entire screen.
"Okay, It's stop, guys." Vanoss said.
"Wow, looks like this is what Youtube expecting in our video." Wildcat said. The team stood up.
"Okay, the cloud is fading." Vanoss said. "Drum roll please."
(*Drum Roll*) (*Ta-Dah*)
"Oh look, It's Nether Portal!" Basically said.
"No, It's obviously a f*cking Rainbow Portal." Wildcat said. The arch had turned into a rainbow. "But here, we've found the Easter egg!"
"What are you talking about. We're pretending the Easter egg has existed, Wildcat." Nogla said. "By the way, It looks so gay..."
"Okay, Okay, let me check inside this wavy surface." Delirious said. He went through the portal. "Oh, guy! There's a way to the other side!"
"Really!" Everyone exclaimed.
"Let me see it!" Wildcat said. He went through the portal after Delirious came out. "Yes, there' a way, but it's too f*cking far."
"So, who will go first?" Vanoss said.
Everyone pointed at Delirious. Wildcat went out the portal and pointed at him. Delirious turned back and pointed to nobody.
"Who are you guy pointing at? There is nobody behind me." Delirious said.
"We're pointing at you, dumbass!" Vanoss said.
"Get in, Delirious." Wildcat said
"Yes, you said it's beautiful, so you go first." Vanoss said.
"I didn't say sh*t!" Delirious said.
"You've activated it, so you're automatically the first one to get in." Basically said.
"Can I be the last one?" Nogla asked.
"Nope." everyone said.
"If you go in the portal and your game crashes, it mean the rest of us is safe and we won't get in, Okay?" Vanoss said.
"What! Why!?" Delirious said.
"I think there is a rumor about this aged Easter egg, actually." Wildcat said.
"STOP with an Easter egg lie bullsh*t already." Vanoss said flatly.
"Noooo." Delirious yelled.
"Get inside already, Delirious! Don't be such a little b*tch!" Basically said.
"Alright, alright, alright, alright." Delirious said. "Don't call me a little b*tch, you lil' b*tch"
Delirious and Basically laughed. Delirious paused in front of the portal.
"Well guys, I'm here to-"
"Shut the f*ck up and get in already, lil' b*tch." Wildcat said and kicked Delirious.
"Ouch!" Everyone laughed. "Alright, you f*cking a**hole. I'm leaving!" Delirious went in the portal and went back out. "Well, if I can't make it, tell my wife I love her."
"We don't care." Vanoss said.
"And you didn't have a wife, Delirious." Basically said. Everyone laughed.
"F*ck you guys." Delirious said and laughed. "Okay, I'm going in! To infinity, And beyond!!"
Delirious ran in the portal. Fairy dust flowed out. Everyone waited casually outside the portal.
"Did you reach another portal yet?" Wildcat said.
"What are you talking about! He's just entered the f*cking portal." Vanoss said and laughed.
"It's too bright! I can't see sh*t!!" Delirious said.
(*Falling*)
"What the hell!" Delirious said.
"Hey, what happened!?" Nogla said.
"I suddenly fell through!" Delirious said.
"How, Delirious?" Basically said.
"Go see it yourself." Delirious said.
"f*ck you." Basically said and laughed.
"Okay, who's next?" Nogla said.
"You're next, Nogla." everyone said.
"What!" Nogla said.
"Hurry up, Nogla. Don't waste our time!" Vanoss said and kicked Nogla into the portal.
"You f*cking a*-"
(*Falling*)
"NOOO!" Nogla yelled.
"Okay, Nogla. What did you see?" Wildcat said.
"I see a bunch of prick on the map, you f*cking sl*t." Nogla said. Everyone laughed.
"Nogla, did you die!?" Basically said.
"No, I'm just falling into the void." Nogla said. "Now I'm drowning. Good f*cking job, you c*ntlord."
Vanoss laughed. "What an instant narrating." He said.
"Yeah, whatever, Nogla. I'm not a retard who get drowning while falling." Wildcat said.
"That doesn't make any sense." Vanoss said.
"Alright, my turn." Basically said. "This is how to make this legitimately. Watch this sh*t."
Basically darted into the portal.
(*Falling*)
"I fell." Basically said.
Everyone laughed. "Wow, such skill!" Wildcat said.
"Incredible gameplay!" Vanoss said.
"F*ck you guy." Basically said.
"You guys are a f*cking faggot, Mkay." Wildcat said in a retarded voice. "This is how yo' run in the portal, watch this sh*t."
Wildcat went in the portal. Delirious and Nogla regrouped with the crew.
"Here I go, B*tch!" Wildcat yelled.
(*Falling*)
"Nailed It!!!" Wildcat yelled. Everyone laughed.
"Okay, your turn, Vanoss." Delirious said.
"Well, watch this!" Vanoss said and ran through the portal. "An elite GTA player style, owl sprinting!" Vanoss went in the portal. "To Narnia!!!." Vanoss yelled.
"By the way, isn't owls are not good with a bright place?" Basically said.
"Oh sh*t." Vanoss said. "But, no, I have my special owl goggles with me. I'm afraid no light."
Wildcat chuckled "What the hell did you talking about. You're just wearing a mask, Evan." Wildcat said.
(*Falling*)
"I fell." Vanoss said.
"Allllllllright, guys. Sound like nobody is gonna make it. I will going to buy some cheeseburger now." Wildcat said.
"Seriously, Wildcat." Vanoss said. "Alright, guy. let go through the portal and left Tyler here." Everyone but Wildcat laughed.
"Whatever, I bet you still can't do this even after I’ve taken a big sh*t." Wildcat said.
"No, we won't!" Basically said. "By the way, let's serious go ham now, guy."
Twenty minutes later, Wildcat had brought and finished his cheeseburger. After experiment, They had finally realized how to get to other side without falling through invisible holes.
"Alright, we've finally known not only the portal is sh*tty, but it's also lack of building regulations. So, we had to figure out how to go across here safety." Wildcat announced.
"Yeah!!!" everyone cheered.
"Not gonna lie, whoever came up with an idea of this portal is a f*cking retard... but! here is how to do it." Wildcat explained. "We will throw a C4 inside the portal. If there is an invisible hole, the C4 will go through. If it's not, the C4 will stick on the ground."
"Yeah." Vanoss said flatly.
"It took us forever to figure this sh*t out, so no F*CKING around inside the portal, Okay." Wildcat said.
"Evan, Delirious..." Basically said. "We need to watch these guys out." Everyone laughed.
"Okay, c'mon in, guys." Wildcat said and led the crew in. "Kobe." Wildcat threw C4s inside the portal to check the way.
"I think I should be in charge of throwing the C4" Vanoss said.
"Shut up, Evan. I know you're gonna f*ck us up." Wildcat said. Delirious, Basically and Nogla laughed.
Vanoss chuckled "Come on, Tyler, We're friend." Vanoss said.
"I want to see what's behind that portal now, guys." Delirious said.
"Yeah, me too." Nogla said.
"Me, three." Basically said.
"Okay, stay... low." Tyler said.
"Stay frosty." Vanoss said and laughed.
"I'm glad we're making some progress right now." Nogla said.
"Well, these nasty holes are wasting a lot of our time." Tyler said.
"These nasty holes, huh?"Vanoss said. Delirious and vanoss laughed suspiciously.
"I wonder if I want to get in these nasty holes?" Basically said.
"Okay... we're getting closer." Wildcat said.
"Look at the top, guys! We can see the whole map from here!" Delirious said.
"This is trippy as sh*t." Nogla said.
"I'm so high right now." Basically said.
"Whoa!!"
"What Wildcat!?" Vanoss said.
"Be careful, man. There is a really wide invisible nasty hole here." Wildcat said.
"Oh sh*t, The C4s are lined up like a crooked snake." Nogla said.
"I can't believe you can handle a C4, Wildcat. I thought you have hooves." Vanoss said.
"Don't underestimate my hooves, man!" Wildcat replied and did a flip off. "Do you see this hoof, man. It's gone in thousands and thousands of hookers' pu**y in Los Santo, you know!"
"Oh god!" Delirious said.
"Disgusting!" Nogla said.
"ฺI know, but how that’s relate to C4, Wildcat?" Vanoss said.
"I don't give a sh*t. I only just told you how I got my STD - Whoa!" Wildcat nearly slipped into an invisible hole "Oh god damn it, you f*cking hole b*tch!"
Everyone laughed "F*cking hole b*tch?" Vanoss said.
The crew managed to reach the end. The exit way were made out of stone. It was covered in mosses. The gang gathered in front of the ancient portal. They were excited and couldn't wait to go in.
"We made it dude." Wildcat said.
"Man, it looks like a Stargate or something." Vanoss said.
"What do you think what’s behind this, man?" Delirious asked.
"I don't know, just get in and see it." Wildcat said and exited. "Whoa, guy!"
"What's happen, Tyler?" Basically asked.
"Come in, man. You need to see this." Wildcat said.
Everyone exited the portal. They found themselves standing inside a small ancient ruin in a jungle. The graphic was changed significantly. From realistic 3D to candy-colored comical texture. The wild jungle looked completely unfriendly. The crew looked around then looked in their map.
"It's a f*cking new map, a whole new map!" Vanoss said.
“Delirious looks like his stupid character in Gmod.” Wildcat said.
“F*ck you.” Delirious said and laughed.
"Yeah, I can't see Los Santo anymore. It’s completely a whole new continent." Nogla said.
"Whoa!" Delirious said. "Guy, look!"
Everyone turned to Delirious. He was holding an assault rifle. It had a texture of red candy cane.
"What?" Vanoss said.
"A CS:GO gun?" Wildcat said. Everyone laughed
"Nonononono, look at this sh*t!" Delirious said. He shot a confetti out of his gun. "Look at this, b*tches! I'm shooting confetti, mothaf*cker!"
"What!" Basically said.
"How did you get that? I want one." Wildcat said.
"Look in your weapon menu. They're all replaced." Delirious said.
Vanoss and his friend took out their 'packed-a-punched' weapon and started to shoot around crazily.
"Wooooooooo! This is amazing!" Basically yelled.
"Yeah, unlimited ammo!!" Nogla said.
Wildcat spun around and shot up to the sky and yelled. "Yeeeeaaaaaaahhhhh!"
"Yeah, f*cking right bois!" Vanoss said.
Confetti rained down from the sky like a celebration. The crew continued to shower themselves by their gun.
After they had fooled around with their packed-a-punch gun, they moved on. It had took them for awhile before they had gotten bored from shooting a confetti to the sky and each other.
"Alright, let's explore this f*cking map!" Wildcat said.
"Yeah!" Everyone cheered.
"So, where should we go first?" Vanoss asked.
"As I've seen on the map, there is a village nearby." Wildcat said. "Since there is no car and some sh*t like that, and we can't call an Uber, so we have to go on foot. Well, are you guy ready for an adventure!?"
"I'm f*cking ready!" Vanoss, Nogla and Basically yelled.
"Hey, let's go to that cloud city!" Delirious said.
"I don't care." Wildcat said "Okay, here we go, bois! Let’s go to the village!"
"Hey, f*cking wait for me, god damn it!" Delirious yelled.
After they had walked for awhile, the gang found the forest to be plain boring and huge. Vanoss looked in his map and found they're still too far from their destination.
"Welp, sound like we have to spend like f*cking hours to walk through this sh*tty jungle." Wildcat said.
"Jungle walking Simulator." Vanoss joked. Basically chuckled. "Order today for thirty-ninety nine."
"I guess it's just a jungle there." Nogla said.
"Well, it certainly has an Easter Eggs somewhere around here." Basically said. "Something like, an alien trapping in an ice."
Vanoss chuckled. He said. "Well, sorry for anyone who watching this video to see us spending thirty hours walking in a jungle, and-"
"Hey, Vanoss." Delirious called.
"What!?" Vanoss said.
"Did you see that?" Delirious said and pointed to the woods. "What is that glowing sh*t over there?"
Wildcat chuckled "What is that glowing sh*t over there?" He imitated Delirious's voice.
"Oh, wait. It's moving." Vanoss said.
Wildcat put out a launcher out. "I don't know what it is, but it's time for that glowing sh*t to die."
"Waitwaitwait, they might be friendly." Vanoss said.
As expected, a wooden wolf came out from the woods and crashed Basically.
"Sh*t, It f*cking hit me!" Basically yelled.
"F*ck! It come after me!" Nogla yelled.
"Let me handle this wooden Wh*re!" Wildcat said and launched a rocket at the wooden wolf. He missed. A firework exploded behind Delirious few meters away.
"Nogla, could you get out of the f*cking way. I can't shoot!" Basically said.
"I'm doing it right now, you c*nt!" Nogla said. "Oh no!"
Wildcat preciously aimed on the wolf. It's running around crazily. "Okay, I got this, I got this!" Wildcat said.
Wildcat launched his rocket and hit the wolf. Firework explored and destroyed the wooden wolf. Delirious put out a squeaky hammer and beat a dead scatter wooden wolf.
"Die, f*cker, die!" Delirious yelled.
"It's already dead!" Vanoss said.
"Oh, I didn't know. I think it's still alive..." Basically said, hit his squeaky hammer on the scattered wooden wolf.
"Wow, what a retard." Wildcat said, stood over the scattered wooden wolf and picked his nose. A short moment later, the pieces of wooden wolf was glowing and assembling themselves.
"Oh f*ck, it's back!" Vanoss said. He pulled out his launcher.
"Die, you f*ck!" Wildcat said, shot his firework rocket at the assembling wolf. It was exploded, then reassembled.
"Ahh, you motherf*cker!" Wildcat yelled. He rapidly launched his firework rocket at the wooden wolf. Everyone, but Delirious, put out their launcher and shot the wolf.
"Yeah, shoot it. Shoot it, girls! Shoot it!" Delirious shouted behind from his friends.
Finally, the wolf gave up. Delirious quickly charged in and hit his squeaky hammer at the scattered wolf.
Delirious laughed and said. "Take that you wooden b*tch!" Everyone laughed.
"Thank for your effort, Delirious." Vanoss said.
"Hashtag, thatdawoodenb*tch!" Nogal said.
Wildcat and Vanoss launched their firework at Nogla, killed him.
"Why!?" Nogla yelled. Everyone laughed. "F*ck you guys. Now, I'm lost inside this sh*tty forest... Wha!"
"'Wha' what?" Vanoss said.
"No! No! Please! Help!" Nogla yelled. "They aregoeawawaw!"
"Speak English, Nogla!" Vanoss said.
"A pack- a pack of wooden b*tch! A pack of wooden b*tch is after me! No~" Nogla yelled.
"Sound hot." Basically said
"Yeah, let's leave Nogla to enjoy himself here." Wildcat said.
"What do you mean 'enjoy myself', you f*cking morons!" Nogla said. Everyone laughed. "F*ck you guy, I'm gonna bring these wood b*tch to you guys. Suck it, you f*cking s*uts."
"What! No!" Vanoss said.
"What the hell, Nogla!" Delirious said.
"I love to share, so shut the f*ck up." Nogla said.
"Who! I saw them!" Wildcat said.
"Sh*t!" Basically yelled.
"Runnnnnnnn!" Delirious yelled.
(*Benny Hill Theme*)
Everyone ran away from wooden wolves. They went and circled around a big tree. The wolves quickly got confusing. It look them for awhile before they realized the gang had left. A wolf groaned. It slapped another wolf's head, span it. They didn't give up and continually pursued the gang.
The wolves quickly found the crew. The gang, however, had welcomed the wolves with launcher. The wolves utterly got destroyed and humiliating by the gang. Wildcat and Delirious had teabagged the scattered wolves before ran off with their friend. The wolves revived themselves. They were extremely angry, but still pursued the gang
The wolves found the gang again across a cliff. However, this was the end for them. The wolves tried to go across a wooden bridge, which they didn't know the gang had planted C4s on. They detonated the bridge. The wolves and their hope scattered into pieces and fell into a stream below. The gang was celebrated by shooting their launcher into the sky. They were cheering crazily and yelled something like "Get rekt, b*tches!"
After their flawless victory, the gang moved on to their destination. They had been laughing along the way.
"Man, that was so entertaining!" Vanoss said.
"Yeah, they can't touch these d*ck" Wilcat said.
"Anyway, what did you guys expect to see more in this map?" Nogla said.
"Pony, maybe?" Basically said.
"Nah, but possible." Nogla said.
"Hey, suckers. We've here now." Wildcat said and pointed forward.
They went out the jungle, stood on a grassland. The gang could see a village not to faraway. The village was medieval and colorful. Most structures were made with flammable material. They could see an apple farm not too far away. A bright blue river flowed in front of the village. Mountains were at miles away and one of them had a big city. The gang looked around. Vanoss cheered flatly and jumped around on the grassland.
"Yay~ we're here~" Vanoss said. "I wonder there is a rainbow waterfall somewhere."
"There is a rainbow waterfall over there." Basically said and pointed toward a city in a cloud.
"C'mon innnn, guys. Let’s check this town out" Delirious said, indicated his friends to follow him.
"It's going to be a ton of stuff to explore." Nogla said. "I can smell it."
"Smell it?" Basically said. "What are you, Nogla? A dog?"
"Don't worry 'bout that sh*t. If this session turned out to be a pile of dog sh*t, we still can have a montage of killing Nogla." Wildcat said.
"What!" Nogla said. Everone laughed
"Alright, guy. Let's not waste our time further and check what's inside." Vanoss said.
Everyone walked to the village. Nogla mumbled something. After a stroll, they finally got their feet inside the village. Basically had seen something flying in the sky. He stopped and looked carefully.
"What's happen, Marcel?" Wildcat said.
"I think I saw something." Basically said.
"Really?" Vanoss said. "What's it?"
"I'm not sure." Basically said.
"What are you talking aboot? I don't see sh*t." Delirious said. He pointed to a boot beside a house.
Vanoss and Wildcat laughed. "Aboot, you said!?" Vanoss said.
"You're lying, Marcel!" Nogla said.
"I'm not lying. It's up there! Look! They think they're sneaky up there with a giant head sticking out of a cloud!" Basically said.
"Nope / Didn't see sh*t." Wildcat and Delirious said.
"Nah, there's nothing there." Nogla said.
"Yeah, I can't see anything here." Vanoss said, walked toward a herd of colorful ponies. They were looking at the crew. The owl man pointed and wandered around. Ponies stepped away when Vanoss got closer to them.
"It's f*cking three feet in front of you. Open your god damn eyes, you b*tch!" Basically yelled.
"Oh, where, where?" Wildcat said and pointed around him. "You mean this one, or this one."
"Yeah, I mean those f*cking ponies in front of you, you idiot!" Basically said.
Vanoss accidentally bumped into a pony. "Oh hey~ I think I found one!" Vanoss said. "I legitimately didn't see it at all in the first place, totally." The pony looked at him and awkwardly smile. The stallion slowly walked away and pretended nothing is happen.
Delirious crouched down and walked to a herd of ponies. They stepped away as the hockey masked man walked through. "Yeah, I think they might be somewhere here." Delirious said.
"No, they're literally around you, you f*cking dumbass." Wildcat said.
Ponies' reaction were mixing with curiosity and anxiousness. Some ponies hid in their house or any cover their can find and peaked at the crew. Some pony simply looked at them on the street.
"They're staring at us." Nogla said. "Okay, let's me see if I can do something to it." Nogla put his thumbs in his ears and did a ghost voice. "Ooo, I'm so scary. Ooo." Nogla said and walked toward two ponies hiding behind a small plant that won't fit them.
"Well, that's sound interesting." Delirious said. He did a ghost voice, walked toward ponies behind boxes and said. "Ooo, I'm gonna eat you alive, Ooo."
"Eat alive!!" a magenta pony behind a box yelled. The mare freaked out.
"Oh sh*t, they can hear us." Delirious said.
"Yeah, we're gonna made a dinner out of you all. Did you hear that!" Wildcat yelled.
"Made a dinner out of us!" ponies said.
It started with small amount of pony panicking first, then it drastically became worse by the gang's prank and packed-a-punch weapons. Similar to citizens in GTA 5, every ponies screamed and ran for their lives. A turmoil ensued when every pony tried to get in their house. Some pony ran into each other or hurt themselves by accident. Ponies shut their door and window tight. The street were quickly deserted, left the crew standing on the road.
"Welp, that escalated very quickly." Vanoss said.
The gang walked around the isolated village. They saw ponies peeking at them through windows. When the gang looked at them, they quickly closed a curtain and peaked through, but their big eyes could still be seen clearly through. After the gang had walked pass, the ponies slowly opened their curtain and stared at the gang. Pegasi ponies carefully looked on the ground from cloud. Vanoss and his friends gather in the middle of street, figured out what to do next.
"Hey, Wildcat. these ponies are pretty smart." Vanoss said. "Just sayin'"
"Yeah, I know." Wildcat said. "They all are f*cking chicken like pedestrians back there, too." Everyone laughed.
"This is very promising. We've a lot of thing to do here" Nogla said.
"So, what should we do first?" Basically said.
"I have an idea." Wildcat said.
Wildcat had noticed they can interacting with various things in the village - especially door and NPCs. He walked toward a house. His friends were watching from faraway. The crew had changed their clothes to their 'impractical' military outfit. The pig man had a C4 on his back, placed by his friends. Wildcat knocked the door. It had took them for awhile before a yellow pony with an orange mane slightly opened the door. The pony peeked anxiously through the door to see the pig man. Wildcat thrust the air at the front of the door. The pony slightly tiled her head.
"Surprise, b*tch!" Wildcat yelled.
Vanoss detonated his bomb, killed his friend and destroyed the door. Wildcat's corpse launched into the air while the pony was launched back into her house. Wildcat’s friends quickly ran into the house with their packed-a-punch gun. The mare pulled herself up, but quickly backed to a wall when she saw the crew.
"Go go go!" Nogla said.
"Breaching clear! Breaching clear!" Basically said.
"Stand by six! Stand by six!" Delirious said, held a squeaky hammer. The mare was shivered with fear.
"Here, we found the terrorist!" Nogla said, pointed his packed-a-punch gun at the pony.
"Stop acting like a navy SEAL." Vanoss said. "When you're pointing a Nerf gun at random pony and said random sh*t." Everyone laughed
"F*ck you." Nogla said. "You do it then, Even"
"Hey, wait for me. I wanna be a part of it." Wildcat said.
"Here, we need to interrogate this b*tch." Vanoss said, approached toward the yellow pony.
The team surrounded the pony. Wildcat joined later and pointed his launcher at the poor mare.
"Here! We’ve found the target!" Wildcat yelled.
"We've already established that, Wildcat." Basically said.
The pony was confused. She sweated. The pony's pupils darted around crazily. The pony begged. "P- please! You can have all of my carrot, but please don't hurt me!"
"Wow, carrots! My favorite!" Delirious said
"Shut the f*ck up, Delirious." Vanoss said, kicked Delirious.
"Ouch! why!" Delirious yelled.
"Aye Aye, pony, we doesn’t have any interest in your carrots. We're here just to find John Conner and his b*tch!" Nogla said, ignored his friend completely.
"Yeah, where are they!" Wildcat yelled.
"That's right. We don't want you god damn carrots!" Vanoss yelled. "Tell us where is John Conner!?"
"What!" the pony exclaimed. She was startled. "No! I- I don't know what you're saying."
"Oh, what?" Vanoss said.
"You need to say in your game or they won't hear you, Evan'." Basically said.
"Oh okay, hold on a second." Vanoss said, toggled in-game mic. "Here, can you hear me?"
The pony nodded. Delirious cut it. "Where are they?!" Delirious yelled.
"I don't know anything! I’m just a farmare!" the pony said and covered her head.
“Farmare?” Delirious said.
“I think she mean ‘farmer’.” Vanoss said.
"Where is John Corner!?" Wildcat cut. "Where did you hid him and his bi*ch!"
"By the way, why did we have to find that dumbass." Basically said. "We're not even that Terroriser guy."
"Oh, make sense." Nogal said. "Em, let me think..."
"The hell!" Vanoss said. "What a terrible set up!"
"Oh, yeah. I've figured it out." Wildcat said. "Where is John Conner!? He's borrowed Batman's porn and doesn’t return them for a month!"
"What!" Basically and the mare said.
"Yeah!" Delirious said. "Badman can't jerk off because of him! Where is John Conner!?"
The pony was confused. Vanoss shot a wall beside the pony and scared her. She flinched and moved away.
"WHERE ARE THEY!?" Vanoss said.
"Pl- Please! I didn't know who 'John Conner' is! All I have is my carrots!" the pony said. It started to tear.
"Don't play game with me..." Basically threatened. "Tell us where is John Conner... or you're de- no I, mean- a non-living pony." Basically put his packed-a-punch handgun closer to the pony.
"You wanna be a non-living, huh!?" Nogla said. "We will skin you alive and jerk off to it if you don't tell us."
"Okay, guys. that's too much." Vanoss said, nervously laughed.
"Yeah, tell us where is John Conner or Batman's porn, or we will beat the sh*t out of you!" Wildcat said.
They'd been silent for a moment before laughed.
"I can't take this seriously." Nogla said.
The pony were confused, nervous and scared. The crew tried not to laugh at the scene where the pony getting scare at their Nerf gun and random threaten. The pony was about to cry. The crew started to feel bad about it.
The pony said. "I-"
"No!" Wildcat yelled.
"She didn't say anything yet!" Nogla said.
"Spread your sh*t!" Delirious said.
"Yeah, ma'am, spread your sh*t!" Basically said.
"Stop it!" Nogla said.
"Alright guys, I think she knows nothing about John Conner and the porn." Vanoss said.
"Yeah." Everyone agreed. The yellow pony was bloomed with hope.
"But!" Vanoss said. The pony felt her heart fell into her hooves. "We must leave no witness..."
"No..." The pony lamented.
"Time to die, little pony b*tch..." Wildcat said.
The crew pointed their packed-a-punch gun at the pony. It moved away and shielded herself hopelessly.
"No, please!" The pony pleaded.
"Say your prayer, Carrot pony." Vanoss said.
"Say it, say it, say it, say it." The crew chanted.
Chanting continued, the pony wept. It lied down, wanted to merge with the floor. Beyond the crew's expectation, She cried out and run toward the crew. The yellow pony knocked Nogla over and got away.
"Wah!" Nogla yelled.
"Sh*t, She got away!" Vanoss said. The mare ran out the door. "Nogla!"
"I didn't do sh*t! You do sh*t!" Nogla yelled.
"Actually, we don't need those porn that much." Wildcat said. "We just said random sh*ts to scare someone here."
"Except Nogla and Delirious, because they're retard." Basically said. Vanoss and Wildcat laughed.
"F*ck you guy." Nogla said. "Now, we're absolutely gonna be chasing by a cop."
"Wept, let's get da hell outta here before it get more ugly." Wildcat said.
Twilight was bored. She had a day off today. The princess read her books again and again in her library and the Cutie map didn't summon her to anywhere. The princess stepped down from her chair and flicked her ears when she heard a fuss in front of her castle. She ran to the front door and investigated. She found a crowd of pony waiting for her.
"What's going on, everypony?" Twilight asked.
"Princess Twilight!" one of the pony said. "There is something in Ponyville!"
Everypony reported her in chaotic order about 'bullies'. Twilight nodded and said. "Don't worry, I will check them out."
The princess left the castle and flied to the village. Everypony cheered and followed her.
"Oh, sh*t! their cops are after us!" Wildcat yelled. “That’s unexpected!”
"What did you expecting from threaten somebody, you dumb b*tch!?" Nogal yelled. “A medal!?”
"Shut up!" Wildcat yelled.
The crew had been hiding inside a tall building. They had used every packed-a-punch gun at police ponies, but turned out to be useless. Delirious swung his squeaky hammer around to threat the police ponies, but quickly ran into a cover to avoid being hit by lasers.
"Oh sh*t, sh*t just got real! sh*t just got real!" Vanoss yelled, shot his launcher at police ponies.
"We got our a** kick here!" Nogal yelled.
The crew was panicked, but Vanoss had come up with a plan. He announced. "Guy! Use our trump card!"
"Trump card?" Nogla said.
"Donald Trump card?" Delirious said.
"Yes, our trump card!" Basically said.
"Yeah, our trump card! Let's use them!" Wildcat said. "By the way, what's our trump card?" Everyone laughed.
"Alright, let's me tell you what’s our trump card." Vanoss said, told his plan to the crew.
Princess Twilight arrived at the front of town hall. Police pony captain saluted to the princess. Twilight looked at an awful mess around the town hall and sweated. It had been awhile Ponyville had turned into this way.
"So, captain, what's the situation?" Twilight asked.
"Everything is under control, ma'am. We've successfully trapped the criminals inside this public building." the captain replied. "They had terrified ponies in this village and threatened Mrs. Carrot Top. She was retrieved and sent to a hospital here. The mare is still traumatized about the attack."
"Poor Mrs. Carrot..." Twilight said. "I will visit her after this... Okay, are you sure the criminals inside the town hall have responsibility in terrorizing Ponyville?"
"Certainly, ma'am. The witnesses have spoken." the captain replied. Twilight turned to a mob of pony. They nodded.
"Alright, let me handle this." Twilight said.
"Wait, princess." the captain said. "Please be careful, they're -em- not pony."
'Not pony?' Twilight thought. She walked toward the town hall with police ponies providing her a protection. Twilight cleared her throat and announced. "Dear anypony inside, please come out from a town hall and surrender. You have no where to run now."
Twilight had waited for awhile before a stallion criminal from the inside replied. "Alright, okay. We're coming out... God damn it."
The princess frowned when she heard unfamiliar words. Five criminals walked out from the town hall with their hands up. Twilight quickly noticed they're human, even through they might be different from many human she had met. The criminals lined up in from of the princess. Police ponies kept their eyes on them without blinking an eye. Four of them worn a mask. One of them was really ugly.
"Here." the criminal with an owl mask said. "We surrender, 'kay."
"Really?" the captain doubted.
Twilight put herself together and said. "You've caused many trouble toward this village and we have no choice but put you all under custody. You have-"
"Hey!"
"What? hi." Twilight faced an owl man.
"I know that we're a completely a**holes here, but would you like to see our magic trick as an apology before taking us to a jail?" an owl man said.
"Yeah, he's a magician, Hoo-dini. He can do many magic trick!" a pig man said. The criminals laughed. Ponies talked to each other.
"Well, can I call for an attorney?" a white masked man said.
"I guess no... other that that, I think it might be inappropriate to do a magic trick here." Twilight said.
"Too late!" an owl man said. "Ninja Vanish!"
"Ninja Vanish!" other criminals said.
The criminals were vanished into a thin air. Ponies and police ponies was panic and looked around for the criminals. Twilight was panic at first, but she was later amazed. She approached and ran a diagnosis spell on the ground where the criminal had stood. She frowned when her magic detected nothing.
"Princess, what should we do!?" the captain said.
"Search the village." Twilight said. "Look for their trace. They shouldn’t getting too far from here."
"Yes, ma'am." the captain replied.
Police ponies and ponies had searched for the criminals, but at the end of the day, they'd found nothing. Ponies felt relief, but they had to clean up what criminals had done later. They're complaining and discussing how to handle the criminals later. Twilight and her friends had joined other ponies cleaning up the village. The princess told her friends about what's happen and they suggested a way to catch the criminals if they’ve come to the village in the future.
Twilight later told her friends to visit Carrot Top with her. Her friend agreed and headed to the hospital after they had done cleaning up.
